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SOUTHERN BANKER: APRIL 30, 1878. The Phonograph. AN EVKSIXG WITH THK MACHINE IN A WESTERN HOME. [Burlington Hawkuyr] It happened that Mrs. Barstinglow was going down to Keokuk lor a few days, and Mr. Barstinglow was incon solable. At one time he protested that she shonld not go; he could not endure the lonesome house during her absence. Atid then again, he declared that if she must go, h«? would neglect his office, and let his , business go to the bow wows, and lie would go with her. At length, how ever, she persuaded him to be rea sonable, and on her repeated assur ance that she would not remain away longer than three days, he consented to let her go. He even bought her ticket, and ordered the carriage and paid for it two days ahead, lest his resolution should give way and he shonld forbid her going from him. And from that time till the morning of her departure Mr Barstinglow spoke in subdued tones, and moved about with the air of a man whose heart was buried under mountains of grief. Before she left the house, Mr. Bar stinglow set the. phonograph in the sitting room, behind the ciock. Then she kissed her disconsolate husband, and begged him to preserve his pre cious life for her sake while she was away, and then she was gone. Every day, during her three days visit in the Gate City, she received a letter from her mourning husband, begging her to come back, and telling ber how lonesome he was without her, and how like a grave the empty house seemed, and iiow the hours dragged over his aching heart with leaden feet. And in three days she came homo, and tilled the solemn house with sunlight and laughter again. The evening after her return to Burlington, she took down the pho- , nograph. “ I wonder,” she said, “ what we . said last in its hearing? It must ; have been something while we were . discussing iny visit. Or may be it ( has caught some of your poor, longing moaning* while I was gone.” And then she turned the crank. “No,” croaked the phonograph,in ..ones, of hearty reassurance, “no . .danger of that; she’s safe in Keokuk ,Jor three days; saw her safely oil, myself this morning. Light your . cigar while I light another lump and mgke the room look cheerful.” “ 1'or mercy’s sake, Mulachi Bar- slinglmv,” she shrieked, “ what does this mean ?” Mr. Barstinglow now looked as though he really did wish she had never gone to Keokuk. “ It’s just as I tell you,’’ he said, with an effort to look unconcerned that was life a humorous book, a colossal success, so far as its utter failure was concerned. “ Somebody lias been talking all sorts of non sense into it ju«t for talks sake. How else could it get bold of such dreadful st uff in our dear little lionv*, lovey ?” Mrs. Barstinglow didn’t say, but she turned away and the phonograph asked carolessly. “ Throw round for the deal She thought she would faint, but she didn’t, and the pitiless machine proceeded to remark, with a variety of voices: “ It's my age.’’ You’ll have to straddle that blind if you come in.” “ Give me two cards.’’ “ Chip one.’’ “ I’ll see your little one and rai«e you a couple.” “ Push tlie bottle this way, Ben.’’ “ Ain’t yon going to stay in, Harry ?” “ Can’t stay in on a pair of sixes.” “Call you.” “ Two small pair, kings to head.” “Tens and deuces. Take the pot.” “ Barsty, get us something to eat. Old girl left the cupboard keys, didn’t she ?” “ Yes ; told her I was going to keep back, at home, to save expenses and keep out of bad company.’’ “ Ha, ha, ha! ! Ho! ho ! ho 1!’’ “ Oh!” yelled Mr. Barstinglow, unable to contain himself any longer, while his wife, more dead than alive, leaned over the phonograph and ground away at the crank, in a dazed kind, of way. “ Oh, keep it up! Thai’s right ! Keep her agoing ! Grind it all cut! Confound the dia bolical piece of black art and the vile assassin that invented it. Keep it up! That’s right! Believe a senseless diabolical piece of monstrou.se me chanism rather than yonr husband. Keep her agoing! Keep it up 1’’ And Mrs. Barstinglow did keep it up. She kept it up and listened to that phonograph swear and shout and howl; she heard it shriek. “ Oh 1 my eye, my eye!’’ She heard it tell some one to let some one else “ have it :>g tin ill the same placeshe heard it warn somebody to “ hold his head over the stove health, and not let his nose bleed on the carpet,” and at last, as it assured her very thickly and with some difficulty, that it was “ a ban’ of jolly goof ful-fuf-fellows,” and that it | “ won’ (hie) won’ g” ome till morn- “ \\ by,” exclaimed Mrs. Bursting- fin",” she ground it into silence, and low, in a countenance of amazement, i sank back, speechless and breathless, what on earth is it, saying?” while .Mr. Barstinglow took tin- pho~ “Oh, some nonsense some of your ! nograph out into the back yard and -visitors l:a\’e talked into it sometime | smashed it into so nianv and such .other,’/ replied her husband, nervous -small fragments that it couldn’t re- Jv ; “ people talk all kind- of sttilf in j produce even a steamboat whistle, to phonograph, you know. They say | And now, when people go over to ! the Barstinglows tor spend a pleasant evening, and happen to say, “ What have yon done with the phonograph, Mr. Barstinglow?’’ It affords the visitors entertainment for the rest of the evening to study the different expressions which creep over the faces of Mr. and Mrs. Barstinglow, while Mr. Barstinglow, ns he answers the question, thinks he would give ten thousand dollars if he could find out how the members of the Para* graphers’ Association tell lies so easily and make them sound so marvellously like the truth. TT!T» ATST DISSOLVED BONE, The highest grade ACID PHOSPHATE r Offered in any Fertilizer, therefore, the best and cheapest for Compost. Ktiwan Crop Food, A concentrated combination of Potash, and very high grade Soluble Phosphate, (put up in barrels, 850 lbs. each.) Nine years* use satisfies me that Etiwan Dis solved Bone is decidedly superior to, and will go further than, any other Fertilizer. Used alone, or composted with Cotton Seed or Staole Manure, furnishes the cheapest ahti best Fer tilizer for Cotton. Bone produces and ripens Fruit, will remain in the toil, if not cropped out, on account of drouth, andfee available in succeeding crops. Bone is the only material a planter can afford to purchase, and is indispensable. EDWARD BANCROFT, Ageut, Barry’s Corner, Broad St., Athens, Ga. feb5-3m. Horses and Mules. Will be here by the 5th of January, with two car leads of horses, and remain for the season at Gann A Reaves’ stable. dec25-tf. W.S. HOLMAN. FOR SALE OR RENT. A DWELLING WITH EIGHT GOOD rooms, fire place in eaeli of tire rooms, good double brick kitchen, stable carriage and out houses. Location on Hancock avenue, near Lucy Cobb Institute. [J. II. HUGGINS, 06-tf No. 7 Broad street. _ For Sale. A second-hand Wheeler & Wilson Sewing Machine; 1ms been but little used and is in per fect order. For sale cheap for ensb. Apply at *cg2SMf THIS OhFlCE ^ COCHRAN, ATTORNEY £JT Z.AW, Gainesville, Ga. /Real Estate and General Laud Agent fofthe purchase and sale of Mineral and Fanning Lands in Hall, and the other conntiesof North- oast Georgia. Mineral ores tested and titles to property investigated. Special attention given totuo purchase and sale of city property. may-2—6m J. N. DORSEY. Attorney. |£ SCHAEFER, ' ^ COTTOXT BTT’STER, Tocoa City, Gu. C'j. Highest cash price paid for cotton. Agent or Winsliip’s Gins mid Press. oc20-lfi75-tf J^IVERV AND SALE STABLE. Carriages, Ituggles «3k horses tor hire. Terms reasonable. E. M. WHITEHEAD, Washington, Wilkes cdtTnty, Ga. rv26-1875-t< LIVERY, FEED MID S1LE..SU61E, GSeoxguu '? -• GANN & REAVES, PROPRIETORS. Will be found at their old stand, r^ar Frank lin House building, Thomas street. Keep al ways on hand good Turnouts and ca.etul dri vers. Stock well cared for when en'rusted;to our care. Stock on 1:v-1 for sale a* all Ciiiea. deelStf. • I :my lb in", for talk.” ill's.,.Barstinglow, looking milv half convinced, geve tin* crank another Umsc. “ Tbis.^is.geod whisky, Barsty,’’ ejaculated the.-iaachiiic, very earnest ly. Yqu don’t get it in Burlington do you ?” Mr*. iBarfitingletv gave a little shriek. “ My .dear;’’ „s;jid her husband, locking fiow.quite,,os* worried as he had looked wher»Jie i»vas begging her not to go to ’Keokuk, “ put it away ; somebody has had.it ojit in the stable, and it might e»y .somethin" perfectly shocking, you know. (Put it away.” But Mrs. BsistingJow.iEpon whom the spirit of investigation; descen ded with great power, ground away, and the Phonograph, ,jjj a voice, marvellously like her husband’4, went remorselessly on. “Not much; they don’t-makeithis kind now. It’s some old Mononga- hela, copper distilled, that Mrs. Bar* ntiiiglow’s mother gave her for modi ' cinal purposes thiee years ago. Fill 1 up, there’s plenty of it, and J can replace it with any kind of beverage when it's gone. The old girl wont know the difference.” Mrs. Barstinglow felt herself turn* ing to stone, but flip next turn of the crank brought out an nproarous— “ Ila, ha, ha! Here’s to the o. g.’’ That fanned her p!.»yel$ into a flame, Great Jerusalem! Gen. Grant has re.'ched the Holy Land, antThas been received in the City of Sion with open arms. Our consul at Jerusalem writes the Department of State an account, of the reception of General Grant, laying stress on the many offi cial attentions shown to the distin* gnished visitor by th** foreign consu lar body and the naiv- authorities, lie was met at Kaloiirah, five miles from Jerusalem, by the dragoons and guards of the several consulates of the Greek patriarch of the Pasha of Palestine, and by a company of'Riv alry, and was welcomed to tlie city with military honors. The Pasha’s military hand of music was in atten dance upou hi;n daily, niid during the tiny* of his stay he received every Hfark of consideration from the Pasha, the local consuls and the dignitaries of the (JrfcJf find Armenian churches. 3-A.3VT HARHIc_ Boot and Slaoe-MaJsex. ATHENS, GEORGIA, - '' (Ovkb Jacobs «fe Miciiaki.’s Stork.) Firt-t class work turned out ou short notice, ht liberal -rices. Give ire 1 call and get -eo ' material n‘u-1 tine work. marelil8-ti ”87 7. - ’>,. I The Quarterly Reviews i ,VN!> | BlaclcutroocUs L£a.gazine ' The Leonard Scott Publishing Co.. II RAIU LAY ST.. NEW YORK. j Continue their authorized Reprints of the FOUR LEADING QUARTERLY REVIEWS. EoiNnrRr.it Review (Whig) London Qcartkrly Rev«ew (Conservative,), WtisTMiNisTKK Review (Liberal^ Bkitisii Quarterly Review (Evangelical), BLACKWOOD'S EDINBURGH MAGAZINE. The British Quarterlies give to the reader well-digested information upon the great events in contemporaneous history, and contain master ly criticisms on all that is fresh and valuable in literature, as well aa a summary of the triumphs of science and art. The wan likely to convulse all Europe will form topics for discussion, that will be treated with n thoroughness and ability nowhere else to be lonnd. Blackwood’s Magazine is famous for stories, esaays, and sketches of the highest literary merit. TERMS (Including Poatage)i I’ataiile Strictly in Advance. For any one Review $4 QO For uny two Reviews 7 00 For any three Reviews 10 00 For all four Reviews |.u 00 For Blackwood’s Magazine 4 OC For Blackwood a ml one Review 7 on For Blackwood and two Reviews 10 00 For Blackwood &u«l three Renews Ill eu For Blackwood and the tour Reviews 15 0o CHAELES F. STUBBS, (Successor to Groover, Stubbs & Co.,) eeTTQN FACTOR —AND— Genera/ Commission Merchant, AGENT; FOR THE Quitman Factory Tania, 94 BAY STREET, Savannah, Georgia. Bagging, Tie*. Rope and other supplies Air mailed. Also, liberal cash advances made on consignments for sale or shipment to Liverpool or Northern ports. r ■ Mr. A. A. WInn, Cashier and Correspondent of the late firm of Gro^fer, Stubbs & Co., has an interest in the business. augSl-tf. J OB WORK OF EVERY |DE- acription done at this office ' T r» j-iito > >.!- v : • 1 i v •* it - ft ' 1 ; • •t . tf t»>*>«o , i I i:>:r 1 1 ei.ni • STOVE DEPOT. ATHENS, GEORGIA. w. a. SUl'EUJNlENDENT. IjnnbtJn Excellenza Cotton Fertilizer JLJSTD DOBBS’ CHEMICALS -FOR— rmr The undersigned has just had manufactured to bis own order a large and fresh supply of the well known * *-’V j if. j. # .jv i . *.. i - • Excellenza Guano andDofcbsChemicalsforComposting which he offers to planters of Northeast Georgia and surrounding country, at the same price aa last year «Biit Douno tor tottoD on Dasisof middling rayao These Fertilizers have been inspected by authority of the State and found to be up to former stand ard and above. All persons desiring to purchase in Athens, will call on the undersigned at his store. They can also be obtained from the following agents. S. M. SHANKLE,*. Harmony Grove, Ga. BOON & ALEXANDER, Maysvillo. Ga. McWHORTER A YOUNG, Antioch, Ga. P. H. BOWERS,. ... Franklin Springs, Ga. W. A. ROYSTON “ « Ga. M. M. JOHNSON, Bowersville, Hart county, Ga. A. R. ELLIOTT, Grove, Elbert county, Ga. R. H. KENNEBREW, Lexington, Ga. S. C. DOBBS, Athens, jan223u>. GUANO1 GUANO! HOUSE, BETTS & BO., NO 6s BROAD STREET, ATHENS, GEORGIA, GENERAL AGENTS FOR Carolina Fertilizer .♦ I! , Eagle ‘Ammoniated Bone Phosphate- AND Eagle Compound Acid Phosphate. The above Fertilfcers are offered to the plainer* of Northeast Georgia with the arsuranee tlial their commercial Talue fa equal to any in the warki-t. 'J liourands of Karmen, in Carolina, Georgia, and Alabama are ready to atteat their value, and we beiv no hesitancy in recommending them to our friend* and customers. Prices as Low as other Slahdurd Fertilizers. jan83m. v HOUSE, BETTS & CO. and Tinware PLANTERS’ HOTEL, ATJGrTJSTAi GEORGIA. ! 3XTE5“W jSL R.A OEMENT. ■ Hates B.educed to $3 per Day. | HAVING LEASED THIS WELL KNOWN HOTEL, I enter I upou its.management by Reducing Rates, and asking ol the Travel- i ing Public, especially my friends of Carolina and Georgia, a continu I ‘ . j am*e of that liberal support they have always given it. B. FORMERLY OF CHARLESTON, TROPRIETOK. jai)2ii 5ui Wando Fertilizer AND Wando Acid Phosphate, MADE BY Wands Phosphate Company OF CHARLESTON, SOUTH CAROLINA Our Fertilizer and Acid Phosphate rank among the highest grades in the market. Sold for Middling Cotton at 15 cents per pound, STANDARD GUARANTEED. Send for Circulars with Analyses and Terms. For sale by J. H. HUGGINS, Athens, Ga. feb.12.2m * ecottse Atlanta, Georgia,. The proprietor of the MARKAM HOUSE takes this method oi informing the traveling public, that notwithstanding the great Euro pean war, his hotel will continue to entertain with its usual hospitali ties and first-class accommodations, such ns he flatters himself has given great popularity and success to his house, and general satisfac tion to those who have honored him bv becoming his guests. Board reasonable and accommodations first-class. 3=2.