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SOUTHERN BANNER: AUGUST 6, 1878. Low Flit Lind. ! ST JONHS. Thetc wnx a man aud his name was Brown, Ami he lived about a mile and a half from ton n ; And this here feller he waa awfully down In the mouth, for his crap wax liken for to drown, Been* l is 80 wax low, flat laud. Ids very midriff hi; niked and pained '> As he notised how the weather mined and rained; ■■ • And hia dratted 80 hit couldn’t be drained. And hi i corn wr.s vallcr and the weeds they gained, .And til l taldpoles threatened for to take that land. If a cloud come up a9 big as a gourd, Why, that wa» enuff, and Jiit ripped and roared, As if u!l the water that ever wax stored Sines the days of Noah had suddenly poured On that miserabl 1 80 of low, flat laud. The weather bu *o bit wu* all in a musa; And itstid of gittin better the weather got wuss; And Brown ’lowed he wouldn’t raise nnthin but pus— Leey, aid he didn’t do quthin but cgss And mope around the edge of that low, flat land. But Missis Brown, slio usen fot to smile, And she sed sbo thought it wan’t wutli while for a banian for to let their temper rile \V hen Providence wanted for to moisten the siie, And drip a little wntet on that low, flat land. Aud so. while Brown be poked fild slumped, His wife slio waa’t a partikle stumpt; And imo the weeds this woman she jumped, And oil summer long she fairly humped, Hcitcltto makes erup on that low, flat land. i< . . And when the eoru-gethen a time came rouud, lustea l of crap all gettin drowned, Thar wus 80 to the aker on that low, flat ground; And Brown sed he rceone 1 as bow he found Hit wu;; more in the woman than it wax in the land ,. —Monmouth (Ill.) Review. The Trimbles of a Poet. While Colonel Bangs, editor of the Argus, was „siti ing. in his. office one day, a man- whpse - hrofv , was clothed •-with thunder entered. Fiercely seizing a chair, slammed his hat on the table, luirl id fas umbrella on the floor and sat ilojfn. “ Ar.- you editor ?’■ 1R asked. •• Yes.” “•Can you read read writing ?” *• Of cours e.” “ Read tliat, then,” he said, thrust tug at. the colonel an envelope with an inscription on it. “ B said the Colonel, try- ing to spell it. “ That’s riot a B. It’s au 3,” said the man. *• S; O yes; I see! Weil, the words look a little like ‘ Salt for Dinner,’ or * Souls of Sinners,”’ said the Colonel. “No sir,’’ replied the man, “ noth* ing of the kind ! That’s my name— Sam’i II. Brunner. I knew you couldn’t read. I called to nee you about that poem of mine you printed the other day, on the Surcease of Sorrow.’” “I don’t remember it,’* said the Colonel. *‘Of oou.se you don’t because it went into the paper under the infa* mous title of ‘Smearcase To-morrow.’” “A stupid blunder of the compo sitors, I suppose.’’ “ Yes, sir and that’s wliai I war.;, to see you about. The way in which that poem was mutilated was simply scaudeious. I havn’t slept a night since. It exposed me to derision. People think I am an ass. Let tne show you,’’ ' / 4 Co ahead,” said tho Colonel. “ Tne first line, wheu I wrote it, read in this way. ‘Lying sy a weeping willow, underneath• gen- • tie dope. That is beautiful, poetic, affecting. Now how did your vile sheet present it to t he public ? There it is! Look at that! Made it read this way “ Lying to a weoping widow to induce her to «1o]ie. Weeping widow, mind yon! A widow ? This is too much! It's enough to drive a matt crazy!” “I’m sorry,’’ said the Colonel; “ but—’’ “ But look a*herc at the fourth verse, said the man. “That’s worse yet. What I said: ‘Cast thy pearls lefore the swine, and lose t! era in the dirt. I wrote that out clearly and distinct* ly, in a plain, round hand. Now, what does your compositor do? Doesjie catch the sense of that beau tiful sentiment ? Nor sir! He sets it up im this fashion. Listen : ‘ Cart thy pilla before the sunrise and love them if they hart. Now, isn’t that a cold-blooded out rage on a man’s feelings? I’ll leave it to yon if it isn’t?’’ “ It’s hard, that’s a fact,” said the Colonel. “ And jlhen Uafcq* the .fifth verse- In the-, original manuscript; it said, plainjiS daylight : - -—_____ * Take away the jingling money, it is only glittering dross. A man with only one eye, and a cataract over that, could Lave read the words correctly. But your pi rate ap8tairs~there, 'do you 'know what he did ? He made it read: ' Take sway the jeering monkeys on a sorely glanderec hone !'^ By George, I felt like braining him with a fire shovel! I was never so cut up iu ray life.’’ “It was natural, too,” said the. Colonel. “ There, for instance, was the sixth verse. I wrote: ‘ I am weary with tho tossiug of the ocean as it heaves. It is a lovoly line, too ; but imagine my horror and the anguish of my family, when I opened your paper, and saw the line transformed into: ' * I am wearing ont my trousers till they’re open! at the knees!’ That is a little too much ! That seems to me like carrying the thing an finch or two too far. I think I have a . i. . * constitutional right to murder that compositor; don’t you f” “ I think you have.’’ “ Let me read you one more verse. I wrote: ‘ I swell the flying ochocn as they roam among i tha hills, ’ f And I feel uiy soak awaken to tilt ecstasy that thrills.’ • No, what do you s’pose your .misera ble outcast turned that into? Why, into this: *' . )!•' , ‘ I smell the frying shoes as they roast, i.longj the bulb., : •’ l ' ••• > • ' 1 Audi peel my sole mis'iabeti £n the ere et ary Iha^lytl*/ . ; Gibberish, sir! Awful gibberish! I, murt .-lay that man. Where is lm at?” > < lie i< out just now, said ■ the Colonel. *• Coute in to-morrow.” 1 will,’’ said the. poet; “ and I will come armed.” Then he put on his hat, shouldered his umbrella, and drifted off down stairs. The Educational Wants of Middle and Southwestern Georgia. We are in receipt of two letters from prominent and influential gen tleman, one a citizen of Milledgeville, the other of Cuthbert, urging that a branch of the State University be lo cated at each of those places. \ j" ^ .Our Milledgeville friend asks that the Legislature donate the old Capt tol and grounds for an agricultural or military school, with such additional endowment as may be necessary. The represent!idi^e fro m Cuthbert, (a moat .exemplary and- public spiri- Never too Lat e to Learn. ‘Socrates, at an extreme old age, learned to play on musical instru ments’ Cato, at eighty years of age, be gan tc> study the Greek language. . Pluiaroh, when between seventy and eighty; commenced the study of Latin. Boccaccio was thirtyffivo years of' age when lie commenced Irs studies in light literature; yet litrbccame one of the greatest masters of the Tuscan dialed,—Dante and Plutarch being the other twy. ; j > | * Sir Henry Sjw Imau neglected the sciences in his youth, hut commenced announces t..at the poo ■ flalu-.! tte study of them when he was be* ^ftoj^ of jOl^tTiVlnteriof towns of Ween fifty and sixty years of age. Our (Coffee How to Make ilt. For a long time I used the coffee^ as coarsely ground as is usually sold in the Bhops. Although procuring the best berries jiossible, I did not uniformly succe ed in procuring at tlio breakfast table a first rate beverage. I consulted many wiseacnis, some of whom said that the water used should* be hotter, others that the coffee should be soaked in cold water, etc By accident one day, I happened; to have the coffee re-ground to the thinness of snuff Herein lay tl« mystery. I have never since foiled to obtain a strong, full flavored bev erage, an<L that too without using a large quantity of coffee. glufttl ri-ady to imie&aimplp no the State, .sown as the exa JJ^tffuWj^ollege, with UgnJAind adjacent, indu ing spring of ition t a new. and i Academy, ofaich acres more of ed land. The iguous, and other could |ble prices, "eijpugh \<t ibal&*tn admirabile^tperi- ar,u - - , corr«npondviip??laim3 that SouUrwelU&T Georgia slfoftld be pro videiJfAWjBaj’ikbp fqnd derived from thesim?T>ftliS’G'ovorJiuiiit Agricul tural scrip, as it is too Inconvenient, and (Ms ton much teeiixi<fter sons to |jpW^ithdns.” Both dries will bejibly represented by their best tnen at the approaching t^e tln^t ity Board of . «, Athens.foud iviH-theit and if e yA^dirablj(_*i\i! should like to sec tho pjgyer both n^ratflcd. tjJl ufd%rcat-. l v) 3rtlifflce tlil’cdricatiur.al advanta ges of flic ciriWitonWealth, anti two a Y"' *■*>-»■ . ' * • . «».-r schools equally with that be of ituutloula- After this he became a most learued antiquarian and lawyer. Doctor Johnson applied * himself to the D itch Language but. a few years before ills death; 11 1 • l i I .ill Ludovico Monaldesco, at the great age of 115 0" f CX? of his own times. Ogilby, the translator of Homer and Virgil, wa$ ui)^qu;^ited. with Latin atuV Greek until lie was past fifty. • « ■ ’ Franklin did not fully commence hisjphilosophical pursuits till lie bad 1....1 ll. O 1 til PUBLISHED EVERY TUESDAY MORNING AT j / <4 f | . Terms, $2.00 a Year, Invariably in Advance. reached his fiftit-th j-ear. Di-jden, in his sixty.-efijhth year, conmienced the translation of the Iliad, his most pleasing production. Tltousands of ex.iiuples ofirtJn wllo" v cAmn f Aiced a nmri mniify-j either tor livvliuood i.r a.iiust-iiient, at an ad vanced age could he cited. But ev ery one tim^n^r witif Jite l)i<fgjj:ipiiy of distinguished men will recoiKct in dividual cases enough to convince him that none Iml the siek aud indo lent w ill ever say: “ I am too old to learn.” • * An Arkansas Cow. ‘ The yield of milk' from ^Norlftern dairy cows is incredible to tU‘|jwo|w in regions where cattle are raised mostly for beef and hides. at Dbhlouega, ble benefit to 1 But the means to consummate these desirable projects we appre hend wou ld have to be provided fW ’fw'BWfi MjilUl■! fllonrh hat,, and a gemt ; Stat.ti by taxatiot. under the tew, constitu tion"’ of Cite' State,ayijT .fhjvpne we would.cheerfully abqnI^.^rTif : ‘l|ch measure. It is almost icnpossilile to expend <5»tlbddf 'riiHf\([^Qwl0gvirtnally control- the gftfernmewif bOtll» State and Federal.V^ut ! tfio present instance, so far as tho avails of the agricultural ««ript»re njoncerned, we do not see h^w they could be consis- fjom,- their present Aeut#|*sLliv« ‘channels. 1 Predicated upon tho-promise to in corporate the fund with the Univer sity eiido^Tneu^ . the city of Athens built Moore College at her own charges, ‘ and' the Sta te expended $15,000 for its equipment. The old mint at Dablonega was given by the government of the United States ning a n’mn that the tar quaffs W milk a The “Southern Banner,” established in the year 1816. A H’ll IF lift is, consequently, sixty-two years old. Beginning when sci- -- ! i l ; f} ence in this country was, comparatively speaking, in its in fancy when the “art” of printing was carried on by a slow A tourist traveling in Sweden wa JiM«ll|%^itl|(»|[) V t$p'4ia^i%8h 0 uId intensely delighted wit It the c oftee Be converted into tin educational e9- served on tho steamboats and hotels, tablishment, -and bo regarded a At.Upsala we determined to find out branch ofthc University, bow they made such perfect as wc had just drank, and stepped into the neat little kitclun of the * 1 2 l ^§fay hold that the- University tel, and this was the reportJl laspeottHiiriarilifveks* riUu in the Tftke any kind of coffee pot or urn %ric«flttiMl &rf^m1& z-Tdegraph and snspend a bag made of felt or very heavy flannel, so long that it reaches the bottom, bound oh n wire just fitting the t:*p; put in the fresh ground pure coffee, and pour on freshly boiled writer. The (laid filters through the bag and may tie used at once; needs no settling and retains all the aroma The advantage of this over ordinary filter in Us economy, as the-coffee stands and soaks out the strength instead of merely letting the water pass through it. A French chemist asserts that if tea be ground like coffee before hot water is poured upon it, it will yield nearly double the amount of exbilera ting qualities. Another writer says: ine butternut suit, ttying to sell a cow i&tike-rnarket- therfe.- It was* a animal^ ami the itfer iivjas info: Wd'give day, iLfed well. Up stepped the Ju^ge. “What do you ask for that cow ?’’ “ About $30. She’ll give five quarts of milk, if yon feed her well,” replied the planter, and he proceeded to describe her go oil qualities. Said the Judge“ I have cows on my farm, not much more than half as big za yonr cow, which give twenty to twenty-five quarts of milk a day.” The planter eyed the Judge sharply for a moment, as if trying to remem ber whether he had ever seen him before or not, and then asked : “ Stranger where do you live ?’’ “ My home is in Iowa.” Yes, stranger, I don’t dispute it. There was heaps of sogers from Iowa down here during the war, and, stronger, they was the all-firedest li ars itt the whole Y r ankec army* Mebbe you motight be an officer in some of them regiments? and tedious pijoeess--tvh : eiV “buck skin balls” were used to j>re4A4hl ink over the rough and unsightly types upon which the paper was printed, with Home News one and Foreign NewsAwo months old, the different Proprietors have battled with Trie changes dRHime—kept pace with the advancement of science, and the rude types and rough presses have been laid aside and their places are now occupied bylall the beau tiful appliances known to the art. ! The-BANNETR is not only\the oldest but the 'largest paper it*.; i} ’' in North-east Georgia, and its columns are weekly tilled with reading matter sfoited to all classes aqdconditions, embracing •x^i#J5,^(felTICS, |r^ri» . r *<! ART, SCIENCE, - 3 -- ’ fLITERATlJgjP, POETRY, AGRICULTURE, HORTICULTURE, DOMESTIC AND OTHER RECEIPTS, STORIES, WIT, HUMOR, &C., AC and Mes»mg*r. Some time since a clever Tuscueran was arrested for cattle staling and hanfed u]> before Judge Flack at Elko for trial. The jury acquitted him without leaving the box, and upon his return here a friend inquired as to thti result of his trial. “No cause of action,” said the gentleman; 44 1 merely killed the ox in self-de fense and ate him for spite, and, of course, 1 was acquitted by the intel ligent jury.” Loyd Garrison 44 confidently pre dicts” that women will vote within If you put a piece "of lump sugar the next decade, and Wend«.-H Phil- the size of a walnut into a tea pot, you will make the tea infuse in half the time. Persons who have tried this last experiment say that the result is satis factory.—Journal of Chemistry. lips says that 44 if we gain in the coming fifteen years as much as we have in the last thirty, women will hold spear and shield in her own hands.’’ PRESCRIPTION _____ For th * r needy Cure of .Seminal Weakiie**, Manhood and all dlaorden bronght nu by indis cretion or excess. Any Druggist ha-i the I ngre- dients. Address, Dr. M. IaQCIX A CO.. 130 tl’est Sixth Mtnei, Cincinnati, O. TOTHB Citizens of Athens Ax&d Vicinity. The nmlcrairned has this day purchnsAi from his brother, Maj. THOMAS A. BURKE, bis entire interoat in the BOOK AND STATION ERY BUSINESS AT ATHENS, and intend* to run a First Class Book Store, ln| which the Beet Goods, latest and most popu lar Boo)ts, aud indeed evenrthing oauVily kept in a Good, Well Appointed Book Store, may be found- Being connected with the well known tnd extensive whoiesaie house of J. W. BCBKE &CO., MACON, GA. His facilitic-s for keeping up stock and keeping everything at Bottom Prices, will give luma decided advantage in buying Boots ,fcc, at Lowest Rates, anil lie intends to give his custo mers tho full benefit of in, by SELLING AS CHEAP AS THE CHEAPEST. He asks Ida old friends iu and around Athens, to give him a share of tho patronage. To all he extends n hearty invitation to cotue mid buy. Maj. T. A. Burke will still be connected with the house, and will have charge of the business, and ho asks his friends and the public to con tinue tiie. patronage heretofore besiowed on him. JOHN W. BURKE. June U.t: NOW IS THE TIME TO SUBSCRIBE. In view of the vital questions which are agitating this and foreign countries, anti the elections that are to take place this fall in Georgia and throughout the United States, a synopsis and discussion of which will be contained in our columns, we are sure that our paper will not only be acceptable but a necessity to every family. Therefore, send in your names and money anti keep posted with the progress ot the times. (BP^-nUlliWfcKHrt.w-Sr HS.W,, . .. . .. . c 0 II R E S-BO N I>E N CI E, j Recognizing the fact that nothing adds more to the popu larity of a paper than an interchange of views between those among whom it circulates, we invite correspondence upon all topics of interest to the public, and especially the current news and agricultural progress of the section of coun- try in the territory of North-east Georgia. vj| o ADVERTISE 11S. With a bona tide circulation of 2,000 copies weekly which guarantees not less than 8,000 readers, throughout- Georgia and the South, and especially in North-east Georgia, one ot the richest sections in the South, we are confident that ad vertisers could find no better medium through which to make their wants known than the columns of the Scjtherx Banner. Address, H. H. CARLTON, Editor & 1’rop’r-