Below is the OCR text representation for this newspapers page.

'Do not speak slightingly of tho rooster because he does not lay eggs; remember Chrtymgig is .(joking. . If ygu could Judge by' appearances, the floorwalker would, own the store. Most any man can-shift his views on the tariff overnight If the other side gives promise of furnishing him with a better job. . How , would you like to be the at mosphere In, a, presidential year? , k r~ i{ Freese to a friend from whom you can borrow money until he asks you to return some of It. While justice Is blind, sometimes you fancy that its trained ear can. hear tho clink of money. ■. s Count your chickens before they arc hatched, If you think flgures woa’t lie. If time Js money, ragtime Is probably rag money. TTbe progress Publshed Every Thursday. H D SMITH, Editor ami Publisher Entered at tho Rostoflloa in Vienna Gn., is second-class mail iimttor. Gossip Is n feminine pastime wlilch when practiced by men is simply get ting a lfne on things. VjL There might be a difference of opin ion ns, to whether a poorhousc wore better'than none. ‘ Also Several Things. Ton And on talking to tho man It Isn't uuoh a joke, Because the ono who also ran You learn Is also broko. better'than Possibly the mule does not care how soon the automobile tdkes Its place as flr?t aid . to war. A soft answer tumeth many a fresh young man down. Needs a Bodyguard. She—It Is not good for man to be alone. He—I should say not when there Is a holdup man on each corner. •S GRFAT ATTRACTION. When a politician tells tho truth-you may be sure that he lias a point to gain, by doing so. In those states where the women vote does the law also give them a right to sit up all night to wait for the returns? No wonder With pr r Declarlns ■ That Ufo • Wo .w.use . !■ welcome spring ilmuksglvlngf " idrdles slm? r • rth living. 11 keeps the data delaying, scarce can wait, ■ arc laying, •up, cold storage' eggs winter dining c. stomach pegs ... .ichher lining. •'•’ho Ions ., they tire kept in store TJk- less 'hey hold attraction, And so we long for Bpring once more And for the hen In action. Tho murmur of the com fed hen, Tho music of her cacltlc. Are melodies that stir us when The storage egg wo tackle. Imagination wafts us high To peaks aloft nnd dizzy, Where wo can look down from tho nky And watch the hens get busy. Then hall the great domestlS bird. Sweet consort of tho rooaterl Who wouldn't apeak for her ft word? Who wouldn't be her booster? And may she kindly stretch n point And set tho works In motion' If gentle spring Is out of joint Or has a backward notion. A bad pen ip, will rclutn to the ebfiochcun' pi u to PBRT PARAGRAPHS. When a boy Is named Boy It !b at-a time that he Is too small to lick those who hand him such a cognomen. • citation ip more brll. •a I thing. SdiT'rflmoa thi limit than the 1 Isn’t tho promoter with stock in sell In a radium mine almost duo? It is a universal weakness of the city man to think that ho would be n glit tering success ns manager of a chicken farm. Tnit-: It Away. . I don’t ilk.- 10 complain. But If there Is anything that gives mo a pain It Is to have a r-reat, big. ten by twelve splinter From the backbone of winter Sticking over Into spring When It Is clearly time to ring Off on zero days And maRe n raise AorMRTHA 1 y//CAMNOT Tl Of a few bushels of Bunshtne. Several baskets of superflno Perfume lndoned air, Some breezes from down whoro Tho orange blossoms grow And where snow Is a curiosity. But, dear met It fs a different thing Wtien you’re looking for spring A man likes .to get board where lie won’t get bored. Yellow dogs think that this country Is suffering from an overproduction of tin cans. . However, Washington was both too modept and too truthful to say himself that he neve? told a lie. On most every train, Expecting It to alight, take off Its things and. remain, To .have the baggageman unload a ear of toe Actors will bo pleased to' fall down and worship any one who will Invent a stage that Is all center. — i'. Judging from his actions yon some times think that the man without a past is. trying his best to accumulate Before the snow Is off tho ground one. what a wonderful gnrdon a man raises — ! in his mind. The fact that horse traders are born ' — nnd not. made Is no particular credit to Of course what Washington told his their parents. wife when he came home after a night — ,f ‘ \j[it^,H»e.boys does not count It Is a slow office boy who does not — know’more than his boss. Homo men may be born great, but — yon can't pflovo It by their immediate . . -I.... •- -* neighbors. >« Aji optimist Is a man who foods a flock’ of hens all winter. In prohibition states they carry their lifo preservers around In a small bot- A man goes Into wedlock with bis oyes open, but n fow weeks of It may cause them to opeu even wider. ■ Did He Accept? Although a man may feel certain that the world can get along without him, he. bates to give it a chanco to try. THF ANSWSR, And’cheerfully say That there la more to follow. Talk],about life seeming hollow YbVleo? like taking a rapid Plunge Into the lake If some way to shake Cold weather does not appoar In tho near Future. You look at tho caso (This way: Winter Is all right in Ms place. But Its place is<the winter time. And you hold It a orlme :!{' , ■ » To have oold weather butting’ In Just .when you want to begin To enjoy life, Enough Is enough Of uiytMlng, and you oall It tough Tliat just wh'en you .have given your ordpr For a full doweled, double book action spring that old winter should got the notion that It was a star sum* ' mer boarder. Jt takes two to play at the game of love, but three can make It much moro Interesting. A lawyer would not think of charg ing for trying a case of champagne. Overeating kills moro men than over work, but the former Is the pleasanter death. Tho tempter came and whispered In bis ear, “Here arc fame and money if you will just depart ever so little from the straight and narrow path.” Of course the reader Is all worked OP to know his reply, but without go ing into details we may just remark that he was human and draw the cur tain to slow'musio. A shallow man should take a tumble to himself pnd dig. Naturally most of the trusts are formed at the seaboard, where the supply of water Is unlimited. . asSeWnA , ni . The man beHInd the. shovel. The man behind itho gun, The man behind tbs counter This blooming land may, run. There’s nothing doing for tho gent Who only Is behind In rent Don’t klpk a man when he's going downhill unless you ore certain that ho has no gun. When you cast your bread on the waters, If It doesn’t return to you go fishing. Where He Belongs, "What would’ you do with a man who cant sing, but will keep at 1 It?” “Send him to Sing Bing If I ctjuld have my way.” A Big Iittta,,': Man wants but little hero below. Well. I deny the charge; Or, granting that It may be so, He wafits that iltUe largo. While It Is true that there la plenty of room at tho top, the ground floor Is good enough for most men. 'll' ,h*l. 1 T* ■ ' ■ It Is one thing for tho officers of the law to smqah a trust and another thing for the trust to find It out’ Poets naturally have It In for the manufacturer* of wastebaskets. Room For Improvement Into a wollho slipped and fell And cried while growing wetter: “Don’t worry, friends! I'm feeling well. But out I would feel better!” Useful Knowledge, “How is he getting along studying iermnhr “Famously,. Ha can say zwel beer He a native. 1 * Its One Drawback. . “After all, is money worth striving ft*?’’ “It might be if one could get a lot of ?t usd never have to wear a dress suit to prove that ho had It.” - These Is no patriotism In a mort gage; l£ works full time on all legal holidays. Radical Mary Is three hundredweight eej>e on growing largo and gra The man who can write passes never lacks for friends. Rural. Free Delivery That you must have a That is* approved by the Postmaster General ^et your mail on the R. F. Dm We have for latest approved by the Postmaster on the market; General. j. J. COOPER, Proprietor mm