The Cartersville courant-American. (Cartersville, Ga.) 1888-1889, August 30, 1888, Image 7

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JlfEDipop. BY WALTER BESANT. (’HALTER F. ALL TilE PEOPLE STANDING. ,j% f.jr \a' \>. •■. f#w% A~% HEN the sun rose over U ft B T\f y certain Sunday early in L,. \ May—year of grace sev- enteen hundred and six- A' >A f i'fi t ty four —it was exactly • four o’clock in the morn y f xl / ing As regards the coast of Northumber land, Ik- sprang with a leap out of a per fectly smooth sea into a perfectly cloud less sky and if there were, as generally happens, certain fogs, mists, clouds and vapors lying about the moors and fells among the Cheviots, they were too far from the town of Warkworth for its peo- ple to see them The long cold spring was over at last, the wallflower on the castle wall was in blossom; the pale prim roses had not yet all gone, the lilac was preparing to throw out its blossoms, the cuckoo whs abroad, the swallows were returning with tumultuous rush, as if they had had quite enough of the sunny south and longed again for the battle ments of the cast le and the banks of Co quet the woods were full of song; the nests were full of young birds, chirping together, partly because they were always hungry, partly because they were rejoic ing in the sunshine, and all the living creatures in wood and field and river were hurrying flying. creeping, crawling, swimming, running, with intent to eat each other out of house and home. The eye of tfie sun fell upon empty streets and closed houses—not even a poacher, much less a thief or burglar, vis ible in the whole of Northumberland; and if there might be here and there a gyp sies tent, the virtuous toes of the occu pants peeped out from beneath the can vas. with never a thought of snaring hares or stealing poultry Even in New castle, which, if you come to think of it, is pretty well for wickedness, the night watchmen slept in their boxes, lanterns long since extinguished, and the wretches who had no beds, no money and slender hopes for the next day’s food slept on the bunks and stalls about the market. Noth ing stirred except the hands of the church clock, and these moved steadily; the quar ters and the hour were struck But for the clocks the towns might have been so many cities of the dead, each house a tomb, each bed a silent grave. The Northumbrian folk began to get up—a little later than usual because it was Sun day—first in the villages and farm houses, next in the small towns; last and latest, in Newcastle, which was ever a lie abed city Wark worth is quite a small town and a great way from Newcastle. It has only one street At one end of it is the church and at the other end is the castle. The street runs up hill from church to castle. In the year 1764 the castle was more ruin ous than it showed in later years, because the keep itself stood rootless, its stairs broken and its floors fallen in—a great shell, echoing thunderously with all the winds As for the walls, the ruined gate ways. the foundations of the chapel, the yawning vaults and the gutted towers, they have always been the same since the destruction of the place The wall flow ers and long grasses grew upon the broken battlements, blackberries and elder bushes occupied the moat; the boys climbed .up to perilous places by fragments of broken steps, the swallows Hew about the lofty keep; the green woods hung upon the slopes above the river, and the winding Roquet rolled around the hill on which tae castle stood—a solitary and deserted place Yet in the evening there was one corner in which the light of a fire could always be seen It came from a chamber beside the great gateway —that which looks upon the meadows to the south Here lived the fugleman He had fitted a small window in the wall, constructed a door, built up the broken stones, and con stituted himself, without asking leave of my Lord of Northumberland, sole tenant of Wark worth castle When the first comers had looked up the street and down the street, straight through and across the other, and exam ined the sky and inspected the horizon, and obtained all possible infomnation about the weather, they gave each other the good morning, and asked for opinions on the subject of hay* Then one by one they went back to their houses—which are of stone, having very small windows with bull’s eye glass in leaden casements, and red tiled roofs Aftei breakfast, for two hours by the clock, they fell to stroking of stubby chins and to wondering when tfte barber would be ready This could not be until stroke of i), at least, because he had to comb dress and powder first the vicar’s wig for Sunday Heaven forbid that tlie church should be put off with anything short of a wig newly combed and newly curled! And next the of* his wor ship Cuthbert Carnaby. Esq., justice of the peace, and second cousin to his lord ship the Earl of Northumberland, newly succeeded to the title When this was dene the barber addressed himself,to the chins and cheeks of the townsfolk, and this with such dexterity and dispatch that before the church bell began he hud them all dispatched and turned off And then their countenances were glorious. &nd shone in the sun like unto the face °f a mirror, and felt as smooth to amoved finger as the chin ami a Eiaid. Thus does art improve and cor r cct nature The savage who wearetb heard knows not this delight it was a day on which something out of the common was to happen, a day on expectation wa3 on and wbn at ’A o’clock the first stroke of the church !><*!l began, all the boya with one an 'he sa n* design turned their steps— slowly at first , and us if the business did not greatly matter, yet should be seen into—toward the churchyard They were all in Sunday best; their hair smooth, their hands white, their shoes brushed and their stockings clean, they moved us if drawn by invisible ropes; as if they could not choose but go; and whereas on ordinary Sundays not a lad among them all entered the church till the very last toll of t lie bell, on this day they made straight for the porch at the first, and this although they knew that if they once set foot within it. they must pass straight on without lingering, into the church, and so take their seats, and have half an hour longer to wait in silence and good behav ior with liability to discipline For a rod is ever ready m church as well us at home, for the back of him who shows lumself void of understanding The fugleman, who wielded that rod was strong of arm. and no boy could call him self fortunate, or botst that he had es caped the scourge of folly till the service was fairly done Out in the fields, and in the fair mea dows, and down the riverside, and along the quiet country paths, and among the woods which hang above the winding of the Coquet, the sound of the bell quick ened the steps of those who were leisurely making t heir way to oil arch, so that every man put best foot for’ard. with a “Hurry up. lad! Lose not this morning’s sight! Be in time! Quick, laggard!” and so forth, each to the other At Morwick Mill. Mistress Barbara Humble would not go to church, though her brother did Nor would she let any other of the household go-, neither her man nor her maid, nor the stranger, if any, that was within her gates, but at 10:o0 of the clock she called them together and read aloud the Penitential Psalms and the commutation service. The show, meantime, had begun. At the first stroke of the bell there walked forth from the vestry room a little proces sion of two First came a tall, spare man of 60 or so. bearing before him a pike, tie was himself as straight and erect as the pike he carried, he wore his best suit, very magnificent, for it was his old uni form kept for Sundays and holidays—tlfat of a sergeant in the Fourteenth, or Berk shire Regiment of Foot, namely, a black three cornered hat, a scarlet coat, faced with yellow and with yellow cuffs, scarlet waistcoat and breeches, white garters and white cravat. On the hat was in silver the white horse of his regiment and the motto “Nee aspera terrent." He walked slowly down the aisle with the precision of a machine, and his face was remark able. because he was on duty, for having no expression whatever You cannot draw a face or in any way present the effigy of a human face which shall say nothing; that is beyond the power of the rudest or the most skilled artist, but some men have acquired this power over their own faces—diplomatists or soldiers they are by trade. This man was a soldier He was bo good a soldior that Lo Lad Loon promoted, first to be corporal, then to be sergeant and lastly to be fugleman, whose place was in the front before the whole regiment, and whose duty it was to lead the exercises at the word of command with his pike In his age and retirement he feted as the executive officer in all matters connected with the ecclesiastical and civic functions of the town, whether to lead the responses, to conduct a bap tism. a funeral or a wedding, to set a man in the stocks and to stand over him. to cane a boy for laughing in church, to put a vagrant in pillory and stand beside him, to tie up an offender to the cart tail and give him five dozen, or. as in the present case, to wrap a lad in a white sheet and remain with him while he did public pen ance for his fault. He was constable, clerk and guardian of the peace. The boy who followed him was a tall and lusty youth past 16, who might very well have passed for 18. a boy with rosy cheeks, blue eyes and brown hair; but his eyes were downcast, his cheek was Hushed with shame because be was clad from head to foot in a long white sheet, and he was placed so clothed, for the space of half an hour, while the bells rang for ser vice in the church porch, and then to stand up before all the congregation to ask pardon of the people, and to repeat the Lord’s Prayer aloud in token of re pentance. The porch of Wark worth church is large and square, fifteen feet across, with a stone bench on either side The boy was stationed within the porch on the e;istern side, and close to the church door, so that all those who passed in must needs behold him At his left hand stood tLs 4j X li /Jffiihi v m] (IfCy At his left hand stood the fugleman. fugleman, pike grounded and bead drect, looking straight before him. and saving nothing except at the beginning, when, discipline for a moment gave way to friendship and he murmured; “Heart up. Master Ralph! What odds is a white sheet?” The* he became rigid, and neither spake no* moved. As for the penitent, he tried to imitate the rigidity of his companion, biri with poor success, for his mouth trembled, ami his eyes sank, and his color canie and went as the people, all of whom h knew, passed him with reproachful or pitying gaze The church and the porch and the churchyard were a’l eyes, he was himself a gigantic monument of shame Here was a lad found out and convicted on the clearest evidence and confession he had made fools of the whole town, here he was before all. undergoing the sen tence pronounced upon him by his wor ship. Mr Carnally, and a sentence so sel dom pronounced as to make it an occasion for wonder, and the offender was not a gypsy or a vagrotn man. or one of them selves, but young Ralph Emblet.on. of Morwick Mill, and the offense was not robbing, or pilfering, or cheating, or smuggling, or beating and striking but quite an unusual and even a romantic kind of offetfse. for which there was no name even, and an offense not falling within auy law Toward the close of the ringing there entered the church, walking majestically through the lane formed by the rustics. Mr Cuthbert Carnaby, justice of the peace, with madam his good lady He was attired in a full wig and a purple coat with laced ruffles, laced cravat, a flowered silk waistcoat, and gold buckles in Ins shoes, in his hand he carried a heavy gold headed stick, and under his arm he bore his laced hat. his ample cheeks were red. and red was his double chin Though his bearing was full of au thority. his eyes were kind, and when he saw the boy standing in the porch he felt inclined to remit the remainder of the punishment “8o Ralph.” he said, stopping to ad monish him. “thy father was a worthy man. he hath not lived to see this But courage, boy, and do the like no more Shame attends folly Thou art young, let this be a lesson After punishment and repentance cometh forgiveness, so cheer up. my lad. ” “Ralph.” said his wife, with a smile in her eyes and a frown on her brow, “1 could find it in my heart to tiog thee soundly, but then thou art punished enough Ghosts indeed' and not a maid would go past the castle after dark, for fear of this boy! Let us hear no more about ghosts She shook her finger—they both shook their fingers—she adjusted her hoop, and entered the church The boy’s heart felt lighter; Mr Carnaby and madam would forgive him His worship went on. bear ing before him his gold headed stick and walked up the aisle to his pew. a large room within the chancel, provided with chairs and cushions, curtains to keep off the draught, and a fireplace for winter. After Mr. Bamaby there walked into the porch a man dressed in good broad cloth with white stockings, and shoes with silver buckles And his coat had silver buttons, which marked him for a man of substance His cheeks were full and his face fiery, as if he was one who. although young, lived well, and his eyes were small and too close together, which made him look like a pig It was Mathew Humble. Ralph’s cousin and guardian At sight of him the boy’s face Hushed and his lips parted, but he restrained himself and said nothing, while the fugle man gave him an admonitory nudge with his elbow The man looked at Ralph from top to toe. as if examining into the arrange ments and anxious to see that all was properly and scientifically carried out “Ta-ta ta'” he said with an air of dis satisfaction* “What is this? Call you this penance? Where is the candle? Did his worship say nothing about the candle?" “Nothing.” replied -the fugleman with shortness. "He ought to have carried a candle Dear me! this is irregular This spoils all But— Ah!—bareheaded”—he stood as far back as the breadth of the porch would allow, so as to get the full effect and to observe the picture from the best point of view—‘An a long white sheet! Ah! bareheaded and in a long white sheet! Oh. what a disgraceful day! These are things, fugleman, which end in the gal lows For an Embleton. too! If the old man can see it what will he think of the boy to whom he left the mill? And to beg pardon” —he smacked his lips with satis faction —"to beg pardon of the people! Ah. and to repeat the Lord’s prayer in the church —the Lord’s prayer—in the .church aloud! The Lord’s prayer—in the church —aloud —before all the people! All! Dear me—dear me!” He wagged his head, as if he could not tear himself away from the spectacle of so much degradation Then he added with a smile of perfect satisfaction a de tail which he had forgotten “Standing, too' The Ixuxi’s prayer—ln the church —aloud—before all the people —standing' This is a pretty beginning, fugleman, for sixteen years If the Lord’s prayer in itself were some thing to be ashamed of he could not have spoken with greater contempt The boy, however, looked straight up into the roof of the porch, made no answer nor seemed to hear The speaker held up both hands, shook his head, sighed and slowly withdrew into the church Then there came down the street an old lady in a white cap, a white apron, a shawl and black mittens, an old lady with a face lined all over, with kind soft eyes and white hair, but her face was troubled. Beside her walked a girl of 12 or there abouts. dressed in white frock and straw hat trimmed with white ribbon, and white cotton mittens, and she was crying and sobbing “Thou mayest stand up in the church." said the old lady, “when he repeats the Lord’s Prayer, but not beside him in the porch. ” “But I helped him.” she cried “Oh, I am as bad as be! lam worse, because I laughed at him and encouraged hkn “But thou bast not been sentenced.” said the old lady “It is thy punish ment, child—and a heavy one —to feel that Ralph bears thy shame and his own. too. ” “I was on one side of the hedge when Dame Ridley dropped her basket,” the child went on, crying more bitterly *“* was on one side and he on the other Oh! oh' oh! She said there were two ghosts — I was one. ” When they reached the porch the girl, at sight of the boy in the sheet, ran and threw her arms about his neck and kissed him. and cried aloud enough for all within to beam , “Oh, Ralph, Ralph, it Is wicked of them!" ’ * * These words were, heard all over the church, and Mathew Humble sprang to Ins feet, as if demanding that the speaker should be carried off to instant execution for contempt of court All eyes were turned upon his worship’s pew. and I know not what would have happened, be cause his periwig was seen to be agitated and the gold head of his stick appeared above the pew; but luckily just then the bells clashed all together, frightening the swallows about the tower so that they flew straight to the castle and stayed there, and the vicar came out of the vestry and sat down in the reading desk, and, as was his custom, surveyed hi 9 church and congregation for a few minutes before the service liegun It is an old church of Norman work in parts, patched up and rebuilt from time to time by the Percies, but there are no monuments of them Tlte vicar’s eyes fell upon a plain whitewashed building, pro vided with rows of ancient ami worm eaten benches, woru black by many gen erations of worshipers The choir and the music sat at the west end hi front of the chancel was a square space in which was set a long stool While the vicar waited the fugleman marched up the aisle, followed by the hoy in the sheet, and both sat on this stool of repentance Then the vicar rose —lie was a benignant old man, with white hair—and begun to read in a full and musical voice how sin tiers may repent and find forgiveness But the people thought lie meant his words to apply this morning especially and only to the boy in the sheet This made them feel surprisingly virtuous and in dined to sing praises with a glad heart So, too. with the lessons one of which dealt with the fate of a wicked king All the people looked at the hoy in the sheet, and felt that, under another name, it was his own story told beforehand prophet ically, and when they stood up to sing in thanksgiving, their gratitude took the form of being glad that they were not upon the stool When the psalms were read the people paid unusual attention, letting the boy have the benefit of all the penitential utterances, but taking the joy ous verses to themselves And the litany they regarded as composed, as well as read, exclusively for this convicted sinner Among the elder ladies there was hope that the offended ghosts might—some at least—be present in the church and see this humiliation, which would not fail to dispose their ghostlinesses to a benevolent attitude, and even influence the weather It seemed to the boy as if that service never would end To the congregation it seemed, on account of this unusual epi sode. as if there never had been a service so short and so exciting When the commandments had been re cited. Ralph almost expected to hear an additional one. “Thou shalt not pretend to be a ghost.” and to he called on to pray, all by himself, for an inclination of the heart to keep that injunction But the vicar threw away the opportunity and ended as usual with the tenth command ment He gave out the psalm and retired to put on his black gown The music—con cisstinor of a v-inlin a trinlnneello and a clarionet —struck up the tune, and the choir, among whom Ralph ought to have been, hemmed and cleared their voices The Northumbrians, as is well known, have good voices and good ears The tune was “Warwick." and the psalm was that which began Lord, in the morning: thou shalt hear My voice asoeml to thee. The boy trembled because the words seemed to refer to the part he was about to play His own voice would, immedi ately. be ascending high, but all by itself. He saw the face of his cousin. Mathew Humble, fixed upon him with ill concealed and malignant joy Why did Mathew hate him with such a bitter hatred? Also he saw the face of the girl who had been his partner, her eyes were full of tears; and at sight of her grief his own eyes be came humid He did not take any part at all in the hymn When ft was finished, the vicar stood in his pulpit waiting, his worship stood up in his pew. his face turned toward the culprit, in his hand his great gold headed caue All the people stared at the culprit with curious eyes, as boys stare at one of their companions when he is about to be flogged Just then the girl left her seat and stepped deliberately up the aisle and stood beside the boy in the sheet And the congregation murmured wonder The fugleman touched the boy’s shoul der and brought his pike to tentiou “Say after me. ”he said aloud Then to the congregation he added “And all the people standing “I eonfess my fault." he began s “I confess my fault,” repeated boy and girl together “And am heartily sorry, and do beg for giveness And then the Lord’s Prayer The boy spoke out the words clearly and boldly, and with his was hear! the girl’s voice as well, but both were nearly drowned by the loud voice of the fugie maiL It was over then. All sat down; the girl beside Ralph on the stool of repent ance. and the sermon began When the vicar had drubbed the pulpit to the very end of his manuscript, and the service was over, the three stood up again and remained standing till the people were all gone “Come, lass.” said the fugleman when the church was empty, “w-e can all go now Off with that rag. Master Ralph " He unbent, his face assumed a human expression, he laid down the pike “What odds. 1 say. is a white sheet? WTr% think, ’twas a show for the lads which they haven’t had for many a year. And May nigh gone already, and never a man in the stocks yet. and the pillory rot ting for want of custom, and never a thief flogged, nor a bear baiting If it twasn’t for the cocks of a Sunday afternoon and the' wrestling, there would have' been nothing for the poor fel lews but your ghosts te keep 'em out of mischief And. lad.” he pointed in the direction of the mill, “your cousin means more mischief It was him that laid information before his worship “OIW” said Ralph, clutching his fists. “Ay. him it wa.% and his worship thought it mean, but he was bound to take notice, for why says his worship, ‘he can’t let this boy frigkfceu all tLo rr.rdds out of their silly senses Yet. for his own cousin and his guardian' that’s what his worship said •Oh!' Again Ralph clinched his lists “Should 1. au old soldier, preach tnuTim? Never But seeing that your cousin is no rightful officer ol yourn. nor yet comrnis sioued to carry pike in your company. why. I. for one” “What, fugleman?" “I. for one* if I was a well grown boy. nigh upon IT, the next time he gave orders for another six dozen, or eveu t hree dozen. I would ask him if he was strong enougn to tie up a mutineer ." The boy nodded Lis head “Cousin tbof he he." continued the fugleman, “captain or lieutenant is he not The boy had by this time divested him self of his sheet, and stood dressed in a long brown coat and plainly cut waistcoat, he. too. wore silver buckles to his shoes, like his cousin, but not silver buttons, his hair was tied with a black ribbon, and his hat was {Tain. without lace or orna ment \\ hen his adviser had finished, ho walked slowly down the empty church, hand in hand with the girl In the porch he stopped, threw his arm round her neck and kissed her twice. “No one but you, Drusy.” he said, “would have done it I’ll never forget it, nev%r. as long as I live Go home to granny, my dear, and have your dinner ” “And you will go home, too. Ralph?” “Yes. lam going home I’ve got to have a talk with Mathew Humble " Left alone in the church, the fugleman sat down irreverently on the steps of the pulpit, and laughed aloud. “Mathew Humble,” he said, “is going to be astonished. ” CHAPTER ri. THE ASTONISHMENT OK MATHEW HUMBLE Ralph walked homeward with head erect, eyes Hashing and clinched lists. He was thinking what he should do. how he should begin his mutiny; what would be the issue of the fight Whatever the result, there would be joy in bringing, if only for once. hand. fist, or stick into con tact with the face or figure of his cousin It was he. was it. who informed against him to his worship? It was no other than his cousin who had compassed this most disagreeable of mornings And now. doubtless, he waited, with a great cane, his arrival at home, in order to administer another of those “corrections” of which he was so fond Hitherto. Ralph had sub mitted quietly; but he had been grow ing; he was within a month of 17; was it to be endured that he should be beaten and flogged like a child of 10, because his cousin hated him? When he left the fields and turned into the lane leading down into the river, he began to look about among the trees and underwood as if searching for something Presently he espied a long, pliant alder branch in its secoud year of growth which seemed promising He cut it to a length of about three feet, trimmed off leaves twin's, balanced it critically with & tentative nourish or two in the air “As thick as my thumb," he said, “and as heavy as his cane Blow for blow. Cousin Mathew This will curl round his shoulders and leave its mark upon bin legs ” Morwiek Mill stands upon the River Coquet, about two miles from Warkworth You can easily get to it by following the banks of the river, which is perhaps the best way, though sometimes you must off shoes and stockings and wade across knee deep to the other side The mill consists of a square house upon the edge of the river, with a great wheel on one side, and almost all of the water of the river is here diverted so as to form a sufficient power for the mill wheel At the back of the mill, which is also a sub stantial dwelling house, is a great careless garden, with pigsties and linnies for cat tle. and vegetables and fruit trees, and at the side are two or three cottages. where live the people employed at the mill All the fields which lie sloping up from the river side belong, as well, to the owner of the mill The owner at this present moment was no other than the scapegrace Ralph, and his cousin. Mathew Humble, was his guardian, who had nothing at all in the world of his own but a little farm of thirty acres The thought of this great inheritance, compared with his own meager holding, filled the good guardian’s heart with bitterness, and his arm. when it came to correction, with a superhuman strength He would be guardian for four years more, then lie would have to a strict account of his guardianship, and the burden of this ob ligation, though he had only held the post for two years, filled him with such wrath and auxiety that he was fain, when he did think upon it. which was often, to pull the cork out of a certain stone jar and allay his anxieties with a dram of strong waters He was very anxious, because already the accounts were-confused, the stone jar was always handy; therefore, lie had become swollen about the neck and coarse of nose, which was a full and prom inent feature, and flabby, as well as fiery, about the cheeks In t hese times of much drinking many men become pendulous of cheek and ruddy of nose at 40 or so. but few at 26 Mathew was not at this time giuch more than 26, say ten years older than Ralph The kitchen, dining room and sitting room of Morwiek Mill was a largo, low room, with one long window At the sides of the room and between the great joists were banging sides of bacon and hams, besides pewter pots and pewter dishes, brightly polished wooden platters, china crips, brass vessels, whips, bridles, a loaded blunderbuss, cudgals. strings of onions, dried herbs of every kind, and all the thousand things wanted for the con duct of a household. At one end was a noble fire of logs burning in an ample chimney, and before the fire a great piece of beef roasting, and now. to outward scrutiny and sense of smell, ready to bo dished A middle aged woman, full, comely and good natured of aspect, was engaged in preparation for that critical operation This was Prudence, who had lived at the mill all her life She looked up as Ralph appeared In the doorway and shook her head, more in pity than in reproach And she looked side ways, by way of friendly warning, in the direction of the table at which sat an other woman of different appearance She was perhaps five m >ix and thirty with thin features and sour expression, not im provi-d bv a east in her eye This wag Barbara. sisTet of Mathew Humble, and now acting in the capacity ul mistress of Morwiek Mill, toi her brothel was not married She had open before her the Bible, and she had found a most beautiful collection of texts appropriate to the case of fools in the book of Proverbs The table was laid for dinner with pewter plates and black handled knives and steel forks The beer had been drawn, and stood in a great brown jug foaming with with a venerable silver bead Ralph ob served without astonishment that the plate set for him contained a piece of dry bread, ostentatiously displayed It was to be his dinner This pleasing maiden. Barbara, who re garded the boy with an affection almost r.3 great as her brother s that is to say. with a malignity quite uncommon, first pointed with her lean and skinny forefinger to the page before her. and read aloud, shaking her head reproachfully “ ’As a man who easteth firebrands, ar rows. afid death, so is the man that de- BRIGHT bits. A suicide in the City of Mexico chose to leap from the bell tower of the cathe dral, a fall of lb!) feet. It was histori cally bloody ground, being the spot where thousands were sacrificed in Aztec times. Spoiled by time: Free Lunch Expert (to bartender) —“These encumbers uin t as fresh as they might be, Mr. Bat-keep.” Bartender —Tiny were fresh enough when you began on the lunch, but how longdo you expect cucumbers to remain fresh?” —New York Sun. Mrs. Pompano—Mary Ann, just ruu across the street and ask that man with a whitewash bucket if he is engaged. Mary Ann (returning alter an animated conversation with Julius IMumbob) — Please, mum, he says he's been married for twelve years.—Drake's Magazine. “What a.simple and modest bathing suit Miss Spider always wears,” remark ed the minister. “Yes,” replied Miss Vivacity, unconsciously. “You will al ways find a girl modest at the seaside when she weighs only eigty-five pounds.” —Puck. Youth — I’ve got some poetry here I'd like to have you look over. Editor —Yes, sir. Have you got your license with you? Youth—My license? Editor—Yes; your poetic license. Youth —N-n-no. I didn't know I had to have one. Editor—We never look over any poetry without first seeing the poet's license. Good day.— Time. Full of business—“Mr. Sampson asked me to be his wife last night, papa.” “And what did you say?” 1 told him I could have ttie usual thirty days or o per cent, off for cash, and then he stop ped and apologized. What am I to think of him, papa?” “Think of him,” shouted the old man. “That young fel low is full of business, and you can't say ‘yes’ too quick.”—Grip. TRY IT ON Cfl. To the man who has tried every other remedy for Blood Poisons, we commend the following experience of a well known woman. SHE HAD TRIED EVEKYTHIG ELSE. Clover Bottom, Sullivan County, Tenn., June IS, 1887 —Blood Balm Cos., Atlanta, Ga: Sir:—l have been thinking of writing to you for some time to let you know of the wonderful cure your B. B. B has affect ed on myself and daughter. She, a girl of 16 years, was taken with a very sore leg below the knee. I called on the very best doctors that the country could afford, and they tended on lier for four years to no purpose. Her leg got worse every year I used about BO bottles of other medicine to no purpose. I lie doctors said the only remedy left amputation. That we all was onposed to I was in Knoxville the Sfh of January, 1886, and while buying a bill ot drugs called for a go id blood purifier, and Messrs. Sanford, Chamber-arid & Cos. recommended the B. B. B. I purchased one half and zen bottles, -.nd to my utter surprise after using three or Fmr bottles my girl's leg was entirely leded. I also had a very ugly running sore on the ca f of my leg and one bottle cured it, after having tried all other remedies I wish you much sucess, and I do hope that all suffering humanity may hear and believe in the only true blood purifier. I have tried three or four other purifiers but the B. B B is the only one that ever did me or mine any good. You can use my name if you wish lam well known in this and Washington couiitv, also all over Virginia. R. S. Elsom. BLOOD TAINT FROM BIRTH. Boonville, ixd., January 2b, IS,->7 I shall overpraise the day that you gen tlemen were born, and shall bless the day that vour medicine was known to me. I had blood poison from birth, an I so much so that all the doctors of my town said I would be crippled for li e. They said I would lose my lower limb. 1 could not stand in my class to recite ray lesson*, eleven bottles of your Balm cprfcd me sound and well You can use inf name as you see fit. In my case, there were knots on my shinbones as large as a hen s Ppwr Yours, MirtleM. Tan nek. THIS FOR FUN. All who desire lull information about the cause and cure of Plood Poisons. Scrofula and Scrofulous Swellings, Ulcers, Sores, Rheumatism, Kidney Complaints, Catarrh, etc., can secure by mail, free, a copy of our 82-page Illustrated Book of Wonders, tilled with the most wonderful and startling proof ever before known. Address, Blood Balm Cos., 719-lrn Atlanta, Ga. Dy-i'.epsia, Desi*ur, Doath. These are the actual steps tVhich follow indigestion. Acker’s English Dyspepsia Tablets will both check and cure this most fearful of diseases. Guaranteed %J. it. Wikle & Cos. cow