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STUFFING THE KING
A Dusky Kongo Monarch Who
Fairly Reveled In Roast Pig.
HE WAS KIND TO HIS WIVES.
Anything on the Menu That Didn’t
Tempt Hi* Dainty Taste Was Passed
to Them, but When His Favorite Dish
Came on It Was All His Very Own.
During his residence in tlie Kongo
town of San Salvador John H. Weeks
had many strange experiences, which
he relates in ids hook. "Among the
Primitive Bakougo.’ hut one of the
most entertaining pictures that he
draws of the strange habit# and cus
toms of tiie people depicts the king,
whose naivete and childish guileless
uess are in strong contrast to- the char
aeteristics of his European coutempo
r'aries.
Occasionally, says Mr. Weeks, we In
vited him to dinner, and the piece de
resistance was a sin king pig, which in
those days we could buy for a shilling’s
worth of doth or beads. Although his
house was 400 yards away, lie al
ways came in his state hammock, car
ried by six of ins headmen. Fortunate
ly the headmen were strong and in the
prime of life; otherwise the king's
weight would have taxed them too
much.
The hammock wasTif native cotton.
"Thrown, dyed and woven in a neighbor
ing village. It was covered with red
cloth adorned with tassels and bells,
and a canopy was arranged to shield
the rider from the sun. As there were
no docks in the palace, we asked our
guest to come at sunset, and no sooner
was the sun below the-horizon than we
heard tiie shouts of the people as they
accompanied tlie king's hammock to
the station.
As lie got nearer we could hoar the
tinkling of the ferret bells on tiie ham
mock, the hurried, heavy breathing of
the hammock carriers and their short,
sharp sentences of direction to one an
other. They were not at all sorry to
lower -the hammock at our door, where
we stood ready to receive anil welcome
him. who. although black, had come in
the most kingly manner he knew and
was certainly very dignified in most of
*nis ways and words.
The hoys quickly put the dinner on
the table, and the king eyed every dish
hungrily. I said to him one day when
I was visiting him in his courtyard and
we were both in n joking mood. "Do
you know what the poorer class of
English boys do when they are invited
to a feast?"
‘‘No," he said. And as he saw me
hesitate he asked, "Well, what do
Have You Stopped to think
That you read all important happenings in the County and in
fcSS THE PROGRESS first?
Why not become a regular subscriber to the Official Organ
of your county and read all the news while it is still news ?
our JOB DEPARTMENT is unexcelleed in
South Georgia.
The Coffee County Progress
“The People’s Paper.”
they do?"
"Why, they eat very little all day,"
1 replied, "so as to have plenty of room
for the feast.”
The old man rolled with laughter,
snapped his fingers, slapped his thighs,
and tears came from his eyes as he
said: ‘‘Why. white man, that is what 1
do, but I did not know that anybody
else was cute enough to think of that.
But. Mfurnu Weekisl, I am smarter
than those white boys, for 1 don’t eat
anything all day when I uni coming
lo take dinner with you at sunset."
After that 1 could understand the hun
gry look in his eyes as lie watched the
dishes put oil the table.
Native provisions of all kiuds were
very cheap, and by sacrificing one or
two tins of preserved goods we were
generally successful in working out a
menu of six or seveti single courses.
Soup made of fowl and goat bones,
with odd bits of meat and seasoning,
a tin of fresli herrings baked or fried,
a roast fowl, stewed goat, roast suck
ling pig and baked rice pudding with
stewed pa paws were our dishes. Out
drinks were lime juice made from fresli
limes and coffee grown in the district.
The king would squat on the ground,
with a row of five or six favorite wives
immediately behind him and the six
headmen who carried the hammock,
standing against tiie wall. The king
would take a few spoonfuls of soup
and paks tiie rest down with a piece
of bread to his waiting wives, who
would quickly and quietly finish them
The fish lie would eat all up, because
it came from the white man's coun
try. while tiie wives pouted their dis
appointment. We would give him a
liberal share of the fowl, but that was
so common that after he had selected
the best pieces the rest was finished by
the expectant wives;
Goat came nest, hut was treated with
as scant courtesy as that bestowed on
the fowl, and meanwhile the old man
would turn ids eyes repeatedly toward
the roasted pig.
When at last that was put before us
we piled bis plate with a liberal por
tion. which rapidly disappeared, while
all the time bis wives were making
mouths in the semidarkuess. He would
grunt assent to more when we asked
liim. and again we would load his
plate. It was the moment for which
lie had lived all the long hours of
that day, for he had heard that the
white man had bought a pig for dinner
Farcical Roles.
An American actor of versatile tal
ents was asked recently what type or
role is most difficult to play. “The
farcical,” he answered. "To enact
farce successfully one must play with
deadly seriousness. Half the effect is
gone once you begin to act your part
lightly. The constant strain to main
tain this mock seriousness is, of course,
exhausting, since you have no outlet
for your emotions."
COFFEE COUNTY PROGRESS
HIS FORMAL REPRIMAND.
It Wa* Not Exactly the Kind He Wae
Asked to Administer.
Dr. Simon I'arvlu, au English clergy
man, was at times absent
minded. Oil' e while he was visiting
in the home of a very great lady who
employed a large staff of servants,
whom she kept under extremely rigid
control, it chanced that two youn
footmen fell out about a pretty house
maid who had coquetted with hot!
and so far forgot themselves as to en
gage in fisticuffs. The old countess
was indignant. Her first intention
was to dismiss the culprits, hut t lie.
were excellent servants, and. more
over, tiie repentant maid tearfully in
terceded for them. The countess re
lented so far as to reduce the sentence
to a formal reprimand before tbe oth
er servants—a reprimand in tbe na
tnre of a moral le. ture to be duly ad
ministered by her distinguished guest
At her earliest request—she was her
self confined to her room bv gout-
Dr. Parvin. a man of imposing pres
ence and resonant voice, permitted
bimself to be escorted to the servants'
hall. On his return she sent for him
to come to her chamber to relate the
result <>f his mission.
“A fine couple," said fir. Parvin. "I
should say. an excellent match.”
“Match?" inquired tiie countess.!
“What match? Has the silly girl
made up her mind between them,
then? I vow, 1 thought she meant to
jilt them both, and serve tiie boobies
right. Pray tell me. how did John and
Thomas receive their reprimand?"
“John? Thomas? Reprimand?" echoed
Dr. Parvin vaguely; then, with a sud
den dismaying flash of memory; “Dear
me. I fear I have made a singular mis
take! When I entered tiie room the
younger servants were at the far end
in a group, and the butler and house
keeper were together, quite near, im
mediately in front of tne. in fact,
standing side by side, and—in shor.t.
madam. I married them!”
He had. indeed: lint, although nston
ished. they were fortunately not un
willing. They had. it happened, long
been contemplating matrimony and
were deterred only by fear of the coun
tess’ disapproval. Believing that she
would not disapprove the act of her
eminent guos*. they had readily abet
ted Dr. Parvin in his error The
countess was angry, but her anger fell
chiefly upon the ahsentiuinded divine.
Kile gave him a piece of her mind that
—if he had been any one else—he
would not easily have forgotten.—
Youth's Companion.
Two Ways of Studying Music.
Picture to yourself a little girl of
seven or eight seated before that pon
derous and portentous mass of Iron,
steel, wood, wires and hammers which
we call a “pianoforte" (sixty pounds
of dclicjite humanity trying to
express itself through a solid ton), her
legs dangling uncomfortably in space,
her little fingers trying painfully to
find the right key and at the same
time to keep in a correct position,
struggling hard the while to relate to
gether two strange things, a curious
black dot. on a page and no ivory key
two feet below it. for neither of which
she feels much affection., And vhen
picture to yourself tiie same child at
its mother’s knee or with other chil
dren singing with joy and delight a
beautiful song.—Thomas Whitney Su
rette in Atlantic.
A Matter of Money.
A wealthy stockbroker who gave an
imposing dinner, says tbe Loudon Tele
graph. dilated with much pride, but
with mangled English, on the delica
cies that he had provided Everything
in season and out of season, he de
clared. was at the disposal of his
guests.
"I notice you have no aspirates." ob
served one of them qnietly.
"No more I 'are.” replied the stock
broker. with crestfallen visage, “but if
money can get ’em." he added. “Pll
'ave some of the best in the market
next time you're ere."
Not to Be Pitied.
Pat (to Mike)—l got a letter from a
f riend.
Mike—Yes?
Pat—He says: “Every rib's gone. I've
only one shoulder, and I expect m.v
legs will be gone by the time you get
this letter."
Mike —Poor fellow! ts he in a bos
pital in France?
Pat —No; he’s in a butcher's shop.—
Exchange.
Mexican Beauties.
The most beautiful women in the
world are said by experienced and ob
servant travelers to be the Indian wo
men of the isthmus of Tehuantepec,
which lies just north of Yucatan, in
Mexico. They add to their picturesque
attractiveness by wearing whatever
fortune they may possess in the form
of gold coins strung about the arms
and neck.
The Very tdea!
Mr. Woggs l'm through with old
man Blimp. I told him we are goiug
to name our baby after some great
personage and asked him for a sug
gestion. Mrs. Woggs—What did he
«ay? Mr. Woggs—He said, “Name it
after ours.”— Puck.
Settled.
"What profession do you think your
boy Josh will choose?"
“Law." replied Farmer Corutossd
".Tosh kin talk louder an' longer when
he's got the wrong side of an argoment
thin anybody 1 ever heard."—Wash
ington Star
SHE SPURNED RICHES.
New York Woman Forced to Take a
Fortune.
Some persons are born rich, others!
acquire riches and a few have riches
thrust upon them.
To the last-named class belongs!
Miss Editli H. Hitching, of Ncvr York.
Miss Hitching must take a legacy of
$l!)4,8fl0 left to her by Frank F. Rip
ley, an uncle, who died last Novem
ber in Brooklyn.
When first fold that her legacy
w-ouid be $40,000, Miss Hitching said
she would not accept it. because the
money was “tainted” and “coined
from the life blood of the people.”
Had her uncle left her the entire
estate she might have accepted it.
she said, as “reparation for wrongs
he had committed against his mar
tyred family.”
Ail appraisal of tiie estate in
Brooklyn allowed that Miss Hitching
received virtually the entire fortune.
She must accept the riches, lawyers
assert, because no one has a right to
abandon title to property. Claims of
$7.‘5,000 for hospitals were denied by
the appraisers.
MOVIE CENSORSHIP.
Measure Creating Board Adopted at
Washington.
A bill to create a national board
of censors to puss on all foreign and
domestic moving picture films shown
in tills country and to prevent the im
portation and interstate shipment of
immoral pictures was agreed upon at
Washington by the house education
committee.
It would provide for a board of five
members and a large number of dep
uty censors to be located in the larger
cities of tiie country. All li'nis ex
cept those dealing with current news
would have to be submitted to censors.
Shippers of improper films would be
subject to fines ranging upward to
SI,OOO.
' A fee of $2 on each original film
and fifty cents on each reprint would
lie assessed against tiie producers, but
provision is made for lowering this
fee if it ts found that the running ex
penses of the hoard can he met at a
smaller cost than the* teital revenue
iliat would lie* proeluced from this levy.
42 MEXICANS SLAIN.
Had Running Fight With Unite
States Troops.
A full sepiaelron e.f twei hundred
anel thirty men of tiie Eleventh
cavalry surprised and routeel a much
large*r force of Villa bandits at Ojo-
Azules, seventeen miles south of
Cusihuirachic. Forty-two Mexicans
were killed and a number wounded.
There were no American casualties.
The American command, under
Major Robert J-. tiowxe, had been pur-
suing the luiiidiis under Generals
Crux Dominguez and Julio Acosta, for
several days when they encountered
them encamped in the huddled adobe
huts of ()jo-Aisulrs.
The Mexicans were completely sur
prised and sprang from their pallet*
half clothed. After firing a few wild
shots they began a flight, each man
shifting for his own safety. Some of
them were aide to seize their homes.
already jaded from a hard day's ride
previously, hut others fled into th*
hills afoot.
RETIRED ON PENSION.
Remarkable Record of Rock Island
Engineer.
Engineer James If. Sheehan, of
Rock Island. 111., retired on a pensions
by the Chicago. Rock Island and Pa
cific railroad, after a half century of
continuous service for that company,
lias tiie unusual record of not havtng
injured .; passenger or employ*, sn<t
never himself having received a
scratch in an accident.
Sheehan became a fireman for th»
road out of Chicago when 1(5 years of
age. He is now (55. His petition id
$88.15 per month.
MILLIONS OF DAMAGE.
179 Buildings Destroyed in Dub lid
Rebellion.
Oife hundred and seventy-nin*
buildings were destroyed during the
fighting in the streets of Dublin, K
was announced by the chief of th«
fire department.
Tiie damage to buildings in Mil*
city is placed at $5,000,000, while th«
damage to stocks in I lie buildings i*
estimated at $.’1.7.50,000. Among th*
structures wiped out by artillery and
fire were business buildings, public
buildings and dwellings.
FOR HOME MISSIONS.
Women of Methodist Church Raise
$3,432,505.
Tiie women of the Methodist Epis
copal Church have raised $",4.’52,50.*
during the last year for homo mission
purposes, according to figures sub
mitted to the general conference at
Saratoga Springs, N. Y.
This is an Increase of nearly SIOO,.
000 over that raised during the pro
ceding four years. The money is con
tributed through the Woman’s Homs
Missionary society.
Are You Saving?
The little savings bank in the home
means more for the future of the chil
dren of u family nlmost than all of the
advice in the world. It gives them the
right start.—William McKinley.
Duty and pleasure make a bad team
to manage.
PAGE SEVEN