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THE FAYETTEVILLE
NEWS.
raBLlSfflHVG CO.
Devoted to the Interests of Fayetteville, Fayette County, and the Publishers.
VOL, 5.
SnbseripUoB Price 91.00 Per lnn f tm JLirmmm.
The Children's Land.
I knew • land a beautiful land,
Fairer than isles of the cast,
Where the farthest hills are rainbow'
spanned,
And mirth holds an endless feast;
Where tears are dried like the morning
dew,
And joys are many, and griefs arc few;
Where the old each day grows glnd and
new,
And life rings clear ns a hell;
1 1* l ho land where the chimes speak sweet
and true
Is the land where the children dwell 1
There are beautiful lands where the rivers
flow
Through valleys of ripened grain;
There arc lauds where armies of worshipers
know
No God but the God of Gain.
1 he chink of gold is the song they sing,
And nil their life-lime harvesting
Are the glittering joys that gold may bring,
In measures they buy and sell;
But the land where love is the coin and king
Is the laud where the children dwell.
They romp in troops through this beautiful
land
From morning till set of sun,
And the Drowsy Fairies have sweet dreams
planned
When the little tasks are done.
Here are no strivings for power and placo,
The last are first in the mimic race,
All hearts arc trusted, all life Is grace,
And Peace siugs “All goes well”—
For God walks daily with unveiled face
In the land where the children dwell.
. —[John Jerome Kooney.
FAIRY’S SECRET.
“A trip to the Yellowstone! You
are too good to me, papa.”
I took her iu my arms, my own
child, from whose cheek the rose had
faded, and in whoso deep-brown eyes
sad shadows had grown.
Sho was of a nature peculiar to
those whose childhood days have been
spout with cldorly people. She felt
deeply. Events that merely ruiHod
lighter natures left lasting effects upon
her. I had watched her tenderly since
her mother had put her iu iny arms,
and left me alone. When she grew
listless and the sweet eyes drooped,
I laid aside all cares and took her
away.
She looked so like her mother the
day we took the train at Chicago. Her
brown dress, just matching her eyes,
lent a deeper shade to her chestnut
hair. As we neared a city in North
ern Illinois Fairy exclaimed: “Oh,
papa, is this another Rome? Surely
it is a city built on seven hills.”
“Galena!” shouted the brnkemnn.
“What climbers tho people must he
here,” sho continued, looking at some
of the long rows of stairs uscendtp
tho steep hills.
The city seemed to be laid out in
terraces. Wc stood at the foot of
Main Streot and looked up at two of
these terraces, with trees of an im
mouse height apparently on each.
I settled myself comfortably and
prepared to go to sleep. Fairy read a
while, but soon drew n locket from
her dress. She touched the spring,
and the sad look camo again .to her
sweet eyes. I had tried lo learn her
secret. Was she sighing for a moth
er’s love ? Perhaps I had better get
married, I thought. I rcsolve.l to
give the mailer serious thought al
some future time. Unknown io
Fairy, I resolved to stop over at
Cheyenne, whore sho was horn, and
Ella, my wife, was called away-
Capt. Storry had often asked mo to
visit the old fort. It would bo liko
old times to sco Hie boys again.
“Do you remember Capt. Slorrcy,
Fairy?” I asked her. “Ho is an old
follow like mo, but a nobler soul
never inhabited a human body.”
I did not think that Fuiry heard.
Sho turned her head quickly and
caught her breath. “You wish to
stop and sco him, papa?” sho asked
sweetly.
“How well I remember tho morning
ho came two yoars ago—you wore
nineteen. Ho asked for you as if you
were a two-year-old. Wo saw you
kneeling over a flower bed, your white
dress and flowing hair making a prottv
picture. Do you remember I told you
to come and kiss papa’s friend? How
llal wont to kiss you and you drew
back so proudly. He rated me sound,
ly for not lolling him you were a lady
grown. Why, Fairy, it seems but
yesterday that you played upon our
knees at tho old fort. You wero such
good friends after that. Why, Ha 1
was like a secoud father.” And so ]
rattled on, lost in old memories.
Hal had stayed at o:ir house for si.\
months and had left suddenly, ]
thought. He smiled strangely, ]
thought, when I, with a fathei’s
adoration, was eulargiug upou Fairy’s
charms.
While I had been droamiug, we
had passed over the great plain", with
their huge herds of cattle uud pretty
Westoru cities. Cheyenno was reached
at last. How changed it seemed!
Some of the dour faces were the same-
They grasped my hands, these old
comrades, «gd J w«l young again,
1 was surprised when, turning sud
denly, I saw a tall, slender lady put
her arms arond Fairy and kiss ber
sadly. I knew ber, Elinor, my wife
friend and the widow of our beloved
commander. Sho, too, was visiting
the foit At the hop the next evening
it dawned upon ino that Fairy was no
longer a child, and that she was ns
lovely as Ella (my wife) was when
first saw her and gave her my whole
heart.
But why did the girl look so wist
ful ? 1 went to whero she stood.
“Fairy, Capt. Slorrcy left last
night for Californio. I am so sorry.
Elinor Aloe’s arm tightened about
Fairy’s .waist. Although tho dear
girl never flinched, yet her cheek
paled. Elinor knew then, I thiuk
what Fuiry’s secret was.
“Are you bliud Captain ?” she
asked tnc one day. To save my soul
couldn’t see what she mount.
Sho was a lovely woman of about
thirty-live, with a face sweet and sym
pathetic, and a carriage like a queen
She suggested that we pay a visit to
her home in Santa Barbara, and see
Yellowstone on our way back. AVe
readily consented.
I cannot tell you of that trip over
tho Rockies. I was inspired,uplifted
awpd. When deep emotions pass
over us we are sometimes left speech
less
Tims with me, I felt my disadvan
tnge; but words failed to express tho
grandour of those snow-capped peaks
as they raised their jutted sides to the
blue sky. Tho deep canyons where
thousands of feet below flowed tho
Colorado—ah, how clearly it showed
us that porsevcrauco will wenr away
the hardest obstacle, aye, evou ada
mant. The Mexican costumes still
cling about Santa Barbara and seem
to instill the air with a vague, sweet
novelty. In this quaint city of roses,
so liko beloved Italy, I left my darl
iug iu Mrs. Aloe’s tender care, while
l took a trip tip the coast. When I
met llul at ’Frisco, I tell you, I felt
my forty-:lircc years lightly.
Hal went back to Santa Barbara
with me. I was telling him how
the last year Fuiry had drooped. Sho
was so dear to me, and so was my
friend, and I could not keep the tears
back. Hal walked down to the beach
and back again
“Bertie,” he said at last, “I am an
old fool, but I lost my henrt to Fairy
that summer I spent at your home.”
“Why, man, you are old enough to
be her fulher!” I exclaimed
“I am not yet forty, Bertie,” he
said. “Of course, I know I can never
win her; she is as far above me as the
stars. But I do love her. It camo to
mo late, but it is real aud earnest,
Bertie.”
I looked at Hal. Ho did not look
old. The brown cnrls were untouched
by time’s silver pencil. Tho unliuod
face, merry blue eyes and stalwart
figure showed n man in tho fulness of
his prime. After Hal had spent
few days iu Santa Barbara, he said to
to me:
“Why don’t you marry Airs. Aloe?
She is alone; so are you and Fuiry.
Sho needs a woman’s care; and Airs
Aloe is such a perfect lady,”
1 pondered over his words. As
Fairy seemed beltqr, we tarried in
Santa Barbara until nearly five mouths
had passed. I was walking on (lie
beach one day when I saw Airs. Aloe
coming towards mo.
“Elinor,” I said, “I am a blunt old
s oldior, and I buried my henrt in El
la's grave. But I have a deep, loyal
regard for you and you aro alone.
Fairy and I need you. Will you Lo
my wife?”
Elinor placed her hand in mine, and
wo wc wont io tho old mission church
aud wero married there ami thou.
We saw Fairy as we camo in, silling
o i (ho veranda, gazing out on the vast
Pacific.
‘Fairy,” I said, “this is my wife.’'
•Aly mother!” And I loft Iho
two—dearest to uio on earth—to
gether.
Wo passod the summer in the Yo-
semite, whero naturo shows herself in
majestic beauty. Capt. Storroy was a
frequent visitor to our home. Never
by look or action did he betray his
secret. With pain I observed that
Fairy avoided him. I was ou tho
verge of telling Elinor more than
once, but could not betray my dear
friend’s secret. Fairy seemed so
Imppy, aud yet at times there
came' that wistful look that so puz
zled me.
“Tell me,” I said one day, drawing
ber to my knee. She laid her head
ou my shoulder, and sobs such as on
ly well forth whou long suppressed
shook her form. She had never kept
a secret from me beforo, aud 1 was
pained. When sho felt belter she (old
me that (here was one preseuco she
longed for, and who, though perhaps
siio loyod not more (ban sho fibl we.
FAYETTEVILLE. FAYETTE COUNTY, QA., FRIDAY. APRIL 7. 1893.
FOIBLES OF SHARKS.
yet ono who, when awny, scorned lo
tako somo of tho sunshine with him.
This from my Fairy, whom I had
guardod so carefully and so well.
Who could lie be? Ah, poor Storrcyl
His chances were gone, indeed. If
Fuiry loved like ibis, she would never
love agnin. “Is it unreturued, dear?”
I asked her.
“Yes, father, he is far ubove mo.
He thinks mo a child.”
How my heart ached. My Fairy
was a woman with a woman’s doom
upon her. I told her then of her
mother—how sho had left me and how
dark the world all looked. “But,
dear,” I said, “you nro a soldier’s
daughter." Then she kissed mo aud
understood.
Sho was no longer listless. Sho
grew more thoughtful, more unselfish
and moro beautiful. She told us one
day she wanted lo go to Italy. 1
never could deny her anything; so she
went Ah, my Fairy, that sorrow has
moulded your character—made you
the woman you are today.
After Fairy had gone a little boy
came to us. It once seemed that my
heart contained no room for another
than I 1 airy, but tHe little fellow with
his eyes soon won liis place in my
heart. When llobbio was two the
longing for Fairy was so great that I
could Jive without her no longer. So
one day Elinor, Robbie and I sot sail
for Iinly.
We did not tell her we were coming
we dropped in upon her. Shall 1 over
forget that day? We entered unan
nounced. A tall lady, her bronze
hair in a classic knot, iicr brown eyes
sparkling, her sweeled lips parted,
turned to us. It was our Fuiry.
Wiien tho greeting were over she led
us to a room, and there wc saw wha*
had detained her in Italy.
There in white marble was a per
fect form in loose drapery. Tho
figure was gracefully posed on one
foot, one arm was upraised, tho beau-
tifnl head thrown slightly back. Tho
expression on the cold, marble face
was one of the sweetest patience. It
was my Fuiry’s work. I took her in
my arms aud silentiy looked at her,
wliilo Elinor eoftly whispered:
“Fear not in a world liko tins, for
you will know ere long, how sublime
a thing it is to suffer and be strong.”
We went to Venice, tho city in the
A Diver’s Experience With the
Marine Monster 0
They Are Rather Curious, But
Rarely Give Trouble.
sea. Unexpectedly I met S orry
took him home with me. As we en
tered our apartments we heard voices.
Nay, Elinor,” Fairy said. “I am
a soldier’s daughter and must go on to
the end with this locked in my heart
Forget it, Elinor. Harry Storroy
cares for me only as his friend’s
daughter. lam weak,mymother. Leave
me to fight it out alone. Forget the
weak words. Let no oilier hoar (item.
Would that they were not beyond re
call !” -
Elinor arose and left her. What an
id ot 1 had been. Fairy had loved him
all the time. 1 went out, leaving Stor
ey standing there.
Fairy lay upon Hie couch motion
less. Storroy went to her and stood
looking at her.
She raised her head and then stood
up. “Capt. Slorrcy.” She was the
self-possessed woman again.
But before she could speak he took
her in his arms,
'Nay, Fairy, your confession is be
yond recall.”—[Chicago News.
Hawaii's Immense Sugar Plantation.
Fifty miles from l’alu, in the north
ern part of Ala ill Island, is tho planta
tion of the Hawaiian Commercial
Company—one of tho largest sugar
estates in iho world, Dr. J. Mott
Smith says. On the sandy isthmus
connecting East and West Alaui, and
on a plain which was formerly an arid
desert, whore not a trco or scarcoly a
blade of grass ten years ago could be
found, can now be soon green pastures,
beautiful flower gardens, avenues of
ces and 12,000 acres of growing
sugarcane. On (his extensive planta
tion is n sugar mill cnpable of manu
facturing 120 tons of sugar a day.
This great change was brought
about by storing tho rain gifts of tho
clouds, which for ages had fallen on
barren rocks forty miles distant and
un to waste into the sea. Tho work
of transferring the rainfall from the
mountains to tho sugar plantation is
one of tho greatest pieces of engineer
ing in the Pacific. Twonty-eight tuu-
nels, 3x8 feet, cut through solid rock,
somo of them 300 feet through, had to
bo dug before good results were ob
tained. Tho water is brought through
pipes, and they deliver 8,000,000 cubic
feet of water a day. The Commercial
Company owns 25,000 acres of laud
this vnlloy, and 12,000 acres of (he
truct aro constantly under cultivation.
[New York Tribuuo.
Sharks are very common all along
the coast of Australia. They become
moro numerous, larger aud more vo
racious the nearer we go to iho
equator. Passengers who make ocean
voyages may often see them from the
deck of the ship, but I see them in
their native clement, says a diver In
Chambers’ Journal. A day seldom
passes when I am at work that I do
not sco some of those creatures. They
do not scctn to recognize a diver when
clad iu his diving dress as something
which is good to eat. Probably he is
mistaken for Borne other great se ft
monster with which the shark would
just as soon as not meusuro his
strength.
At all events sharks rarely give us
any active anuoyance. At first when
we go into a new country they exhib
it some curiosity. They sometimes
come and inspect us and our work,
m oving slowly around us with per
ceptible motion and smelling us like
great dogs.- It gives one a very hor
rible feeling of insecurity, I assure
you, when one of those monsters
twelve or fourteen feet long runs his
hobo around your body, and without
oven a solitary “wag” of his tail to
indicate good fellowship. The shark
will swim away right enough when
ho has finished his inspection—at
least he has always done so wilh me—
and although annoying I can stand it
now.
Sometimes when you go down of a
morning you will find half a dozen big
and littlo sharks who have evidently
selected the sile of your operations as
a camping ground. This is awkward.
Perhaps they have observed the dis
turbance ut (he bottom of the sea,
and, like marine constables, they “arc
waiting for tho fellow who made it to
run him in.” This is an awkward
experience, for those sharks do not
clear off and admit your claim. They
say all animals have a fear of man,
but sharks cannot recognize a man in
a diver’s costume. They neither op.
po6e nor assist us in our operations—
they simply ignore us. AVe have to
be very careful then, walking arou id
about these pigs without disturbing
them.
1 have occasionally used a small
crowbar as a weapon and struck a
small shark on the nose when he was
annoying me with his persistency.
The shark will then turn and go oil
with a rush. I would not, however,
like to try my crowbar on a shark len
feet long. After his rush awny he
might return for further investiga
tion.
1 have had many nasty adventures
with sharks when pursuing my occu
pation. I recollect one tiiat gave me
a considerable shock. I had been en
gaged blowing up a reef of rocks so
as to enlargo a little harbor on the
coast. It was my duty to make the
hole and put in tho charge of dyna
mite. The charge was exploded in
the evening after we left off work.
On going down every morning I was
accustomed to go over to a certain
ledge which was always a good rest
ing place for lobsters. Morning after
morning I had invariably found a
pair or moro of these crustaceans,
which I sent to tho surface in a bas
ket.
On the morning to which I now
refer I walked straight to the ledgo
aud ran my hand carefully along its
lower side. 1 was surprised to find
my hand scraping wtiat I took to lie
the rock, but I was surprised still more
whou l observed my hand groping
within a foot of the mouth of a great
shark which had retired to rest in this
cavity.
Tho shark must have been as much
alarmed as 1 was, for it made ouc
sprinting from its resting place and
disappeared in tho dark wall of tho
ocean. The shock to me was greater
than I could have believed, and even
yet I do not care to think about it. It
is hardly necessary to say that I did
not return to that ledgo for lobsters
for somo time.
task, an aged man—who is hired for
♦his purpose and receives a small com
pensation—lays his hand upon the
head of the little one aud exclaims:
“Long may you live!"
Those present thereupon sit down lo
a great feast, of which even Iho little
hero of the day receives his share in
the shape of a tiny piece of the ricc-
flour cake, which was donated liy his
grandmother. All who have made
presents (of clothing, bracelets, etc.,)
to the child since i's birth are invited
to the repast.
On this day Iho infant is also pres-
cnled with a red bed, a low chair of
the same color and a cap upon which
cither golden, silver or copper orna
ments representing Buddha or eight
cherubs or writfeu diameters (that
signify old age and riclios) arc placed.
Before the child is put into the now
bed, however, tho father consults a
calendar and selects a lucky day.
The almanac also informs him which
things shoti'd bo removed from the
presence of tho child. In one in
stance it must not touch or see objects
mado of bamboo during a certain
time; in another instance articles of
opper and iron are pioicribed.
Objects which are denoted as harm
ful by the calendar are citiier con
cealed or taken away.—[Sun Fraucisco
Examiner.
FOB THE HOUSEWIFE.
Plowed Up a Fortune.
“Speaking of money,” said Joint I.
Spencer, “brings to my mind (ho
great find the Owens fumily made
near Bedford, Ind., somo two years
ago. That country is rather hilly,
and Hie ground not very desirable for
agricultural purposes. This family
lind some 200 acres of laud and largely
used it for pasturage. However,
about the time I refer to one of the
Owens boys decided to cultivate a
small portion wuicli lie judged to be
belter soil ihan the rest. AA’ith this
point in view he began plowing in
the early spring. In the course o 1
liis work lie struck a sung. Before
turning the plow aside lie endeavored
to draw out the snag. By striking
the horse he forced the plow only
deeper into the earth. The sudden
start of tho horse jerked the sunken
log loose from the earth and revealed
a heap of silver aud gold coins. He
gathered the find of coins and removed
them to the house, whero he polished
up the many pieces and took an ac.
count of their face value.
‘The find included rare old Frenct
coins, both copper, silver and gold;
American silver dollars, someAIexicat
and some coins of the Revolntiouarv
period.
“The face value of the many pieces
fooled up $500, but the market value
was something like $10,000. The old
set tiers assert that the money was left
there by somo former resident, who
feared the appioach of tho Indians.
Having buried the money he probably
engaged in a battle with the Indians
and never lived lo return and lake up
hell ensure. The money, no doubt,
ay under that log for fully sixty
years, and possibly longer.”—[St.
Louis Globe Democrat.
THE BEST WAY TO SINGE A CHICKEN.
A most convenient aud in every
way desirable method of singeing •
chicken is over the blaze of a little
alcohol lamp. If it is roastod a most
delicious additiou is mushroom sauce,
To make this sanco, brown a table-
spoouful of hatter in a saucepan, and
after mixing with a tablespoonful of
flour brown agaiu. Add lo this a half
pint of good stock, a little salt and
white pepper, half a can of mush
rooms aud two or three olives. When
it is thoroughly blended it is ready to
serve.—[New Yotk AVorld.
FARINA SOL'P.
Farina soup must be made from
stock. Prepare your stock the day
before you waut to use it. Wheu
cold, remove every particle of fat
from the lop; take the stock carefully
from the bowl, leaving all the sedi
ment In the bottom. Put two quarts
of this stock into a porcelain-lined or
grauite kettle, and let it simmer gently
uutil reduced to three pints. Then add
a teaspoouf ul of grated onion and a
palatable seasoning of salt and pepper,
one clov.e one and one-half ounces of
farina; put this into a bow), take the
bowl in the left hand, sprinkle it care
fully into the soup, stirring all the
w^iile. A wooden spoon must be
used; the farina must be sprinkled in
very slowly, and the stirring must be
continuous to prevent the lamps.
Cover the kettle, let the soup boil
gently for fifteen minutes, and it is
ready to serve.
A recent novel says of ouo of (he
Chinese Babies.
When a Chinese baby is a mouth
old it is giveu a nawo. Its head is
also shaved for the first time, a cere-
mouy which is called “munefot,”
and is made the occasion of great re
joicing iu rich families. All members
of the family aro present iu their holi.
diy attire, ami tho baby to be shaved
is clad in a light red gurmont.
characters: “Ho was as gupdy «. J, Tho lll!U 14 >^»b>vod is wrapped
red man with tho blues,” ’ in l a P er carefully preserved.
After tho bn/bpr jj#s poifopmod hi*
The A'egetable Structure of Coal.
The substance of coal lias been so
compressed iliat the forms of the
plants composing it cannot usually be
seen. But when a piece of it is made
so thin that it will transmit light, and
is (lien subjected to a powerful micro
scope, its vegetable structure may
cadily bo distinguished. Immediate-
y under every separate seam of ccal
here is a stratum of what is known
as fire clay. This stratum is always
present and contains in great abumi
nce tho fossil impressions of roots
ml stems and twigs, showing that it
was once tho soil from which vegeta
tion grew hixuriently. It is common
also to find fossil trco stems lying
mashed flat between tho layers of
black slate which form the roofs of
coal mines as well as the impressions
of tho leaves, nuts and seeds which
fell from these trees wliilo they were
living. In some beds of cauuel coal
wliolo troos havo been found with
toots, branches, leaves and seeds com
plete, and ail converted into the same
quality of coal as that by which they
wero surrounded.— [AVashiugtou Star.
A DISH FOR A KING.
Baked apr!as withcocoanut. is a dish
dainty enough to set before the king.
It is prepared thus: Peel and core six
large greening apples without break-
! them. Set in a pan aud fill each
apple with sugar. Boil the skins aud
cores in water till soft, and strain
them through a cheesecloth bag. Pour
the juice thus obtained over the ap
ples, cover closely and boil the fruit
till half tender. Transfer the apples
to another pan, sprinkle them thickly
with freshly grated cocoauut mixed
with sugar, and set iu the oven to bake
to a delicate brown. In the meantime
strain the liquor the fruit was cooked
in into a saucepan and measure it.
Allow for one pint liquid one pound
of sugar and boil quickly for five min
utes. AVkeu the apples are done place
on a fancy dish, pour over the syrup,
heap fresli cocoauut in little mounds
on the apples, powder with sugar, set
ou the icc till cold and serve. If prop
erly prepared the apples will be sur
rounded by a bed of clear thick jelly.
— [New York News.
STEAMED DESSERTS.
There arc many simple steamed des.
serts which may be cooked in hot
water iu the oveu or in a steamer
over a pot. One of the best of these
is an old-fashioned custard pudding,
which calls for a quart of milk, five
eggs and sugar and flavoring to the
taste. Tut these into little cups.
Little tiu pudding moulds which hold
nbont two gills each are as good as
anything for the purpose. Grease
tho moulds before tho puddings ar«
put in, and set them in a pan of boil
ing water reaching to half the height
of the cups, and steam them forty
minutes. Do not serve them in cups,
but turn them out on a desert platter.
Serve one mould to each person, with
a little cream sauce over it. For a
steamed lemon pudding use three
tablespoonfuls of butter aud six of
powdered sugar, beaten to a cream;
finally the yolks of six eggs, tile
grated peel aud juice of a lemon and
tho white of six eggs. Cook iu ex
actly tho same way as for the custard
pudding. ALiko an orange pudding
by substituting tbe rind aud juice
of an orange for tho lemon. — [Now
York Tribune.
Kissing the Children.
Kisses in the morning
Alake the day seem brlgh'
Filling every corner
With a gleam of light;
And wbat.hnppinees be misses,
Who, affection’s impulse scorning,
Departs, and gives no kisses
To tbe children in the morning.
Many think It folly;
Many say it’s bliss;
A ery much depending
Ou whose lips you kiss.
But the truth I am confessing,
And I’d have you all take warning,
If you covet any blessing,
Ki9s the children iu the morning.
Kisses in the evening
W hen the lights are low,
Set two hearts a-liaming
With affection's glow.
And tbe angels swarm in numbers
Round the pillow they are pressing,
AVho are wooed to peaceful slumbers
By a dear one’s fond caressing.
Kisses In the morning
Arc not out of place;
Kisses In the evening
Have a special grace;
And it seems to me that this is
For indulgence, lawful reason ;
Sweetest tulips—I mean kisses
Ye are never out of season !
— [The Ledger.
HUMOROUS.
Love may be blind, but lie knows
wheu the parlor lamp is tc > high.
A revolver is no large weapon, but
it can be made to cover a very large
man.
About the hardest crop to raise on a
farm nowadays is the boys in the
family.
She —lou know you broke yotu
promse to me. He—Nevermiud, lean
make another just as good.
A\ hen a man inherits a portion ol
a goodly estato he has no trouble iu
findiug people ready to take his part.
“Today was prize day al my school,' 1
said Jimmie. “Aud did my little boy
get anything?” asked papa. “Yep.
Got kept in.”
Banks—Rivers, how do you suppose
that wonderful bird, the phoenix, ever
caught fire? Rivers—probably from
a defective flew.
A bird in the hand is worth two !u the
bush,
Though gorgeous '.heir plumage and re-
s»i;
But, instead of an oriole, robin or thrush,
Let the bird be a bright, golden eagle.
Air, S.'owthink—I—ei—you have
noticed how the days are getting
longer and Aiiss Pei t!y—It seems
to me as though it's the evenings.
“You have been in my mind all
day, Aiiss Angie,” lie cooed sweetly.
“Great mercy'” groand the girl iu
agony; can it le that I am us small as
that?”
“AV’ell, mademoiselle, isn’t ho a
handsome fellow? ’ “Yes, he is, but
certainly one of his legs is too short.”
“Too short? Quito the contrary; ono
of his legs is too loug.”
“Why are you so naughty, Johnmo
It seems with mamma worn out and
papa witli a broken arm, you might
try to be good.” “Iloh!” said
Johunie. “That's just the time to be
bad. No one can lick me.”
Reasonably Explained.
“Claude, do you kuow what has be-
come of the pie erve that was iu this
bowl ?”
“You mean the evnpora'eJ peaches,
ma’am?”
“Yos.”
“Don’t you think they might have
evaporate 1, mamma?’—[Judge.
There aro 1695 mil road bridges of
various classes in Massachusetts, ac
cording to oftlcial figures, which also
show that tlioro havo been 18,647 train
accidents in the United States dating
lift last twenty yp#rs.
HOLSKHOLD HINTS.
If a new clothes liue is boiled it will
not “kink.”
Stains made by acids can be neutra
lized by ammonia.
Half a lemon dipped iu salt will
clean copper and brass articles aud
make them look like new.
To rciuovo hard grease spots from
| a stove put a few drops of kerosene
oil ou a cloth aud rub them with this.
Use a damp cloth dipped in baking
soda to cleau tiu ware. Rub well,
rinse aud wipo dry with a clean
towel.
To remove stains from marbles, rub
them with au old toolli brush dipped
in powdered chalk and ammouia
mixed to a soft paste.
A tablespoonful of ammouia to a
quart of water is the best medium for
cleaning windows, lamp cliimuey*and
ftiiy kind of glassware, „ 1
Hushed AVitli Business.
He was a big, strong, Lcnlthy-look-
ing fellow, and when lie knocked at
a kitchen door on Antoine street and
asked for something toeal, tiie woman
was not charitably disposed.
“AVant something to eat?” she
snapped.
“I'm very hungry, ma’am,” lie re
sponded.
“You ought to be.”
“1 am,” lie admitted humbly.
“\A by don’t you go to work?”
“I haven’t lime, ma’am.”
“Haven’t time?” she asked iu sur
prise.
“No ma'am, I'm busy.”
“Busy, indeed!” she said sarcasti
cally. “I’d like to know what keeps
you busy?”
“Hustlin’ around from houso to
house, ma’am.”
“AA’hat?”
“Hustlin’ around from house ta
house, ma’am, tryiu’ lo gii something
to eat, lakes up all my time, so I dou’t
havo any loft to work in. That's the
gospel truth, ma’am; and if you don’t
give me a bile, I’ll havo to wasie two
or throe precious hours, ma’am, look-
in up somebody that will,” and his
nerve saved him. —[Detroit Free Press.
Why Turtles Cannot Bite.
A r ory few people know that ncithei
a turtle, nor a tortoise, uor a toad, is
provided with teeth. There is a gen
eral superstition (hat a turtle can bite
off a man's ti'iger, but the turtle can
do nolhiug of the kind. Its jaws aro
very s'rong, and the horny membrane
that runs around he jaw, where, iu
other animals, toolh are found, is so
lmtd and tough that iho lurtlo
crush.Ihe boiicx "f 'lie hand lo put]
but A) for hi: tug off even a linger, i
font]#, to tbo turtle, an impossibility.