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“I WOULD RATHER NOT.** [Original.] Colonel Robert Bears and his daugh ter Churlotte were all In all to each other. They were only two, there he lug neither mother nor brothers 'nor sisters. All Charlotte knew at her mother was what she had leen given to understand—that she had died dur ing Charlotte's Infancy. Charlotte had often tried to Induce her father to talk about her mother without success. Hire naturally inferred that his loss was too great to dwell upon. She had also asked for a picture of her mother, but was told that none was In posses sion of the family. Colonel Sears was wealthy and not only gave his daughter everything she needed or desired, but made her the medium for what he !>ostowod In char ity. Strangely enough, she took a fan cy to establish a home for erring wom en-a small affair In which temporary shelter and encouragement were given to a fow who had been unfortunate, but who had not yet started on a life consequent upon their mlsfortuno. Iler fntlier was away when she conceived this design, and when he returned he tried In vain to dissuade her from It. But she bad a strong will and was loath to yield. Besides, she had gone so far that lu case she abandoned her home all thai had been Invested would ,bo a dead loss. ''Her father consented, but Charlotte could never persuade him to enter the place. Indeed, It seemed to have some strong repulsion for him. One day a carriage stopped at the door of the Honrs residence. A Indy en tered the house and usked lo see the colonel. He was not nt home, and the maid took the message to Charlotte. Charlotte went down into the room wfiore the lady wns waltlug. She found a woman with a sad face, from which great beauty was fading. She was richly dressed and In uppearanoe and manner a lady. “Father is uot at home,” said Char lotte. “Can Ido anything for you 7“ “I told Ihe maid to announce me only to your father. She did wrong to go to you. Mo, you cuu't be ol’ service to me.” Charlotte wondered what business the Indy might have with ter father, but was too well bred t > ask. The lady made no move to depart, but sat looking nt the girl, who stood before her wailing. It seemed to Charlotte that she had a very kindly face. “1 fear you are disappointed in not finding ray father. If you will give mo your name, I will tell him as soon as he comes in that you havo been here, and he will call upon you.” “How are you getting on with your home?” asked the lady without notic ing the offer. “My home? You moan the home for girls who have beeu unfortunate? It isn’t mine; I only manage it. Father has given all tho money for it.” “You mean, I suppose, by unfor tunates. girls who have sinned without suspecting that they were sinning, pure In mind and Impure under the law. Would >ou take in one who had trans gressed the law knowingly?” “I would rather not” The lady winced. “Are you very happy?” she asked presently. "1 have nothing to make me unhap py.” “Your fnther is very good to you. lie is u good man.” “Every one agrees with you in than” “And your mother—was she a good woman too?” Charlotte's happy*expression at hear ing her father’s praises left her. “1 know uothlng of my mother,” she said. "Nobody seems sufficiently Informed of her to satisfy my craving for knowl edge of her. But I’m sure she must have beeu a good woman.” “Why?” “Well, fnther seems to feel her loss so keenly. Tie hnsn’t the heart to speak of her.” The Indy was silent for n time. Tier eyes were wandering, lighting oeca sionnlly on Charlotte with an expres sion that Charlotte could not fathom. Presently she said: “Your mother was a good woman.” “You know her?” “Well.” This was the Inst went the visitor spoke. File arose. Charlotte begged her to tell her more, but a resolute ex pression came over the visitor’s face, and she went out without looking hack. "Who shall 1 say called?" asked Charlotte. lint there was no response. The lady got Into her carriage, and as Charlotte listened to the sound of retreating wheels she felt that her longing for more Information on the subject nearest her heart would never be gratified. Later Colonel Soars called at the home of the woman who had visited him. "Ton were at the house yesterday," lie said. . "Yes 1 had an important announce ment which T Intended to make to your daughter, explaining all to her, but I eoultl not do It." "What announcement?” "The man the law called my hus band has died In the asylum, whore he had existed for a qyacter of a oen- A Romance Marred. [Original] Crash! The automobile struck the carriage nt the fore right comer and demolished It, leaving a young lady to be extricat ed from the rubbish. She S?agged her self out, and when a young man, white as death, leaped from the motor she was standing looking dazedly at the ruins. “Great heavens!” he exclaimed. "Are you alive?” "Yes,” replied the girl; “at least I tbluk so.” “And not hurt?” "Not at all.” And she straightway fell Into his arms In a dead faint. By this time a crowd had gathered. The man holding the girl looked übout him for some place of refuge and, see ing a drug store, carried her there, the crowd following. A sprinkling and a stimulant revived her, aud she ex pressed her desire to go to her home. The chauffeur had meanwhile examin ed the automobile, fonnd It but slightly damaged and pulled It up In front of the drug store. The gentleman sup ported the girl to the sidewalk, put her in a rear seat of the motor and sat down )>esldc her. The chauffeur turned the crank, and the preliminary chug chugging commenced. “A romance!” shouted oue of the crowd. “Isn’t It lovely?” said another. "What a pretty pair!” cried a third. The vehicle began to move, and the couple had the extreme relief and pleasure to escape, followed by such shouts as: “Send us tickets to the wedding.” “This (June) is a good month for mar riages.” And one fellow with neither wit nor delicacy cried, “I wish you a large family.” Now, this might havo been the cud of the unpleasant part of the Incident had It not been that n reporter for a society paper happened to be among the crowd. Ileulizing his opportunity, he called a cal), followed th. couple, got their names, and tho next morn ing Iris paper contained an account of the accident, the embarrassing circum stances and the remarks of the crowd. The article was written in true repor tortal style and intended to bo witty and facetious, the writer condemning the remarks as Indelicate, then scat tering them broadcast in print. The principals In the comedy were Albion Grammont, a young man of in dependent fortune, and Alice Hunt. They were both members of the same social circle, but had never met. Gram mont could not banish the sight of the lovely figure arising from the wreck of her carriage nor the delicious expe rience of having that figure in Ills arms. The girl dwelt upon the teuder solidludo she had seen in his hand some eyes and the comfort she had felt In knowing that there was one with her who would take every care of her. In short, the affair was from the first just what the crowd affirmed It to be—a romance, or, In other words, a sudden ease of love on both sides. The harm was all done by the re porter. Had he subordinated his and his paper’s Interests to that of the young couple the affair might, not withstanding the remarks of the crowd, have gone smoothly. But had he done this he would not have been a report er. One could as well expect a weasel to spare a couple of Bpring chickens. Grammont made love to Miss Hunt lie was never seen with her by others— but, the story of fhelr meeting having gone out among their acquaintances, the lady vowed that she would never marry a man with whom her name had been so ridiculously connected. “Suppose we an' married,” she said. “The papers will contain columns of accounts headed ‘A Romance In High Life,’ ‘A Crowd’s Predictions Realized,’ ‘lie Met Ills Fate In a Crash,’ and all that. Then I would have to read It all over again by the wastebasket full. No, I'll never consent." “I wish,” said Grammont—“l wish I had that reporter’s nock on a block and It was a mile long. I’d like to chop it In a thousand places." “I’d like to stick him full of pins," said Miss Hunt. "Why not l>o married privately?” Suggested the lover. The lady, who had from childhood counted on a fine display at her wed ding, held off from this for a year, but nt last consented to the plan that they should at once go abroad and remain there till the incidents of their meet ing had become an old story. This was by no means la accord with bar tury. I went fo you to' claim you openly and tell Charlotte that here after we might live together a happy trio. 1 dared not break In upon her innocence. Her impressions must re main ns they are.” “And you—I?” “We must continue to suffer.” Charlotte did not see her mother again till after she had been married and had children of her own. Then when her father was old and lonely he engaged a housekeeper. As soon as Charlotte saw her she recognized the visitor of some years before. ROSALIE WHITING. In YTRAGQon this Stare Offers You The Best Beys’ Gothfog Made You Find the Label in Every Garment RPPPM (m /hey Are ■ Absolutely Guaranteed HR are net many makers, who have %>,,<• W. reached the mark of superiority by which p J ve judge heys* clothing; only about one in ten; you jj:,;/- h _ can count them on the fingers of one hand. |lll Put we’ve found the best of all. We’ve gone over the field, sorted, sifted and rejected until we’ve settled Sllll If A sAjrnpr.* 11* a ai\ jp£>B• 4m $ I JjP CLOTHES FOR BOYS M duce, the best any store can sell, the best 998 S in you gee style, quality WB i'S : I =* j ana better service. You secure more of v ; 4&. value in these respects than in ordinary 888 r| . ••• doth, linings and materials used; and B| i- ' 4 because of the newer way of cutting, fit- fA; _ . ' I ting and shaping these into garments. p| Hf ftrjgf Peep the came XSSdfi i:.D li mind.'^l I|r ; !•.'••; -,1 Icc:’ tu!t,s!aaN c-- 7to | 17; also Fussiansi, Sailers a?id Jar,ir>r* for yotf.ig?^era ! &jjdyp > : .v 2’i to SO A ? r r ..v -7*rietv cf f?.t Ir.o that are soil- ‘ Umi >vf?ky% • able and tj! ike c.-!ora and eras desired. Prices $5.00 to $12.00. ajSSflSi : m imm g station, but there was no other alterna tive except to face the jokes of their friends and acquaintances and the vo luminous accounts of the affair in the newspapers. So they were married with great secrecy and sailed for Eng land an hour after the wedding. On the arrival of the next mail after they land reached London they received a newspaper containing an article marked In blue pencil with scare heads: SHE AROSE FROM THE WRECK AS VENUS FROM THE SEA- Was succored by the man whose car riage caused the damage. Received prema ture congratulations from a gaping crowd. Tho match predicted by this paper came about in due time. Private wedding of Mr. Albion Grammont and Miss Alice Hunt. Secret out and all society amused. Given away by an application for license. Mr. Grammont the moment he caught sight of the headings tried to keep the paper from his bride, hut It was too late. She had seen enough to tell the story. She rend the headings, then had a good cry - . All this happened some seven or eight years ago. If the Incidents con nected with the first meeting of Mr. and Mrs. Gramruont are not forgotten, they have at least become an old story. GRACE ADA IIOWE. A Yankee Trick. [Original.] The colonies of North America, hav ing been composed of different nation alities, were diverse. New Y’ork was Dutch, while the adjacent colony on the cast Connecticut was English, and the two no more mingled than oil and water. Indeed, the border line was the scene of a continuous quarrel. On one side of this line lived Jona ihaa Fym, a young Yankee, while on the other lived Katrina Bleeker, a young Dutch girl. Pym used to stray across the boundary line to hunt and fish In the Dutchmen’s territory, which only tended to Increase the hostility between the two peoples, especially firing the sluggish Dutchmen against the sharp wltted New Englander. But when It was learned that Jonathan’s incursions were for very different game than fish or fowl, indeed that he was courting Katrina Bleeker, all tho Dutchmen on the border laid down their clay pipes, set their schnapps mugs on the table and vowed that no Dutch girl should marry with the hated Yankees. Then they took up their pipes and their mugs and began to consider how they should prevent such a horrible catastrophe. The re sult was th?t Katrina was shut tm in one ox raose little forts hunt along tne eastern edge the Dutch colony. When Jonathan next stole over the border to the trysting place he did not find his love, but a note scribbled In a mixture of Dutch and English toll ing that she expected to be shut up immediately in the fort. Jonathan went back to his people and told thorn of his misfortune. They listened to him with occasional Interruptions such as “Dew tell!” and “Want t’ know,” and when he had finished and asked them to help him out of the difficulty they volunteered to a man. The next day all the Yankees living near Jonathan’s home collected, with pikes, matchlocks, scythes and pitch lurks. and set out for the fort where Katrina was a prisoner. The approach wua over an open field, and the Dutch man on guard In the fort happened to be awake. He raised the alarm, and presently a little six pounder sent a shot over the heads of the advancing Yankees. Jonathan called a halt. Now, Jonathan did not wish to sacri fice the lives of his friends simply 7 to gain a wife for himself, so he Invested the fort, hoping to starve out the garri son. But, whether It was that fear had taken away the Dutchmen’s appetite or that the fort was well stored with pro visions, tho starvation process was a failure. Still there must be a dearth of fresh food, for the Yankees had kept the venders of perishable property away. Jonathan, true to his Yankee blood, preferred stratagem to blood shed and concluded to try to reduce the fort by the former method. He with drew his forces from one of the ap proaches, a swampy piece of ground, leaving the Dutchmen to suppose that he had been driven off by the mos quitoes. Then he concentrated the prin cipal part of his force behind a barn that had been incautiously left stand ing quite near the fort The next morning the Dutchmen saw a number of women, with baskets on their arms, making their way across the swamp. They came on, chatting among themselves, and when a short distance from the fort sat down their baskets and themselves for a rest. The baskets contained butter and eggs, and the women kept up a clatter, discuss ing the merits of their produce and what prices they would get for It when they reached the settlement. The sight °* ,^ e ro^s o - fresh butter and the white eggs tickled the stomachs of the Dutchmen gapjng at them over the parapet of the fort, and it was not long before the women were hailed to know if they would sell and why so many of them were together. They replied that they would sell if they could get af much, fpcjlieir wares as at the settle ment and that they were going to gether for J?rptetfism_JfrpjEO, AU.e. ,In- a point. Be this as if may, the’gates of the fort were thrown open, and the butter and egg venders entered. They had scarcely got Inside and set down their baskets when the main Yankee force concealed behind the barn made a rush upon the gates. The Dutchmen were about to run to the as sistance of those who were shutting them when they were set upon by the women and either held or driven back, while those coming from without over came the gatemen, and In a few min utes the whole Yankee army was !n the fort. A Dutchman Is no hand to defend himself against surprise, and those defending the fort surrendered at discretion. Jonathan told them that his only requirement was that Katrina should be permitted to choose between going with him or remaining with them. Katrina was brought forth and chose to go with her Connecticut lover. Then there was a wedding at which much Holland gin was consumed and a peace. Before leaving the Yankees had sold all the butter and eggs they had with them to the Dutchmen for a good price, but when the latter came to break the eggs they found them to be of white stone, while the butter was painted wood. ERNEST LEON MUNRO. A Mighty Rare Autograph. There are an unlimited number and variety of the genus autograph col lector. Some have the grewsome fad of collecting all autographic matter re lating to the assassins of our presi dents. To be successful even In this limited range requires much careful research and great patience. The more Inconspicuous and unknown the sub jects chosen the more difficult the task of collecting. It may be suid that It Is an easier task to secure an authentic autograph of Napoleon Bonaparte or of Cromwell than one of the practical ly unknown murderer of President Mc- Kinley. The very obscurity from which the perpetrator temporarily emerged Is hard to penetrate and there fore makes the securing of his auto graph a difficult task.—Collector. Tobacco as a Drug. I know that many are of the opinion our northern simples are weak, imper fect, not so well concocted, of such force, as those In. southern parts, not so fit to be used In physic, and will theref* fetch their drugs afar off senna, cassia out of Egypt, rhubarb from Barbary, aloes from Socotra, tar- Llth, agaric, mlrbolanes, heripodacti;3 from the East Indies; tobacco from tho west—Burton’s “Anatomy of Melon cboly.” -