Below is the OCR text representation for this newspapers page.

RHEUMATISM MOVEMENT CURE. UY K. 3. MTKDETT, or TltE Hawke ye. .Yen' York Weekly. One day, not a great while ago, Mr. Middlerib, who is a constant reader of the New York Weekly, read in Ins fa vorite paper a paragraph copied from the Praeger Landwirthschajliches Wo • chenblatt , a German paper, which is an accepted authority on such points, sta ting that the sting of a bee was a sure cure for rheumatism, and citing several remarkable instances in which people had been perfectly cured by this abrupt remedy. Mr. Middlerib did not stop to reflect that a paper with sue!) a name as that would be very apt to say any thing ; he only thought of the rheu matic twinges that grappled his knees once in awhile, and made life a burden to him. lie read the article several times, and pondered over it. lie understood that the stinging must be done scientifically and thoroughly. The bee, as he under stood the article, was to be griped by the cars and set down upon the rheu matic joint, and held there until it stung itself stingless. He had some misgiv ings about the matter. He knew it would hurt. He hardly thought it could hurt any worse than the rheumatism, and it had been so many years since he was stung by a bee that he had almost forgotten what it felt like. lie had, however, a general feeling that it would hurt some, lint desperate diseases re quire desperate remedies, and Mr. Middlerib wa3 willing to undergo any amount of suffering if it would cure his rheumatism. He contracted with Master Mid lle rib for a limited supply of bees, hum ming and buzzing about in the summer air, but Mr. Middlerib did not know how to get them. He felt, however, that he could safely depend upon the instincts and methods of boyhood, lie knew that if there was any way in heaven whereby the shyest bee that ever lifted a two-hundred-pound man off the clover could bo induced to enter a wide-mouthed glass bottle, his son knew that way. For the small sum of one dime Mas ter Middlerib agreed to procure several, to-wit: six bees, sex and age net speci fied ; but, as Mr. Middlerib was left in uncertainty as to the race, it was made obligatory upon the contractor to have three of them honey and three humble or-, in the generally accepted vernacu lar, bumble-bees. Mr. M. did not tell bis son what lie wanted those bees for. and the boy went off on his mission with bis head so full of astonishment that it fairly whirled. Evening brings all home, and the last rays of the de clining sun fell upon Master Middlerib with a short, wide-mouthed bottle com fortably populated with hot, ill-natured bees, and Mr. Middlerib and a dime. The dime and the bottle changed hands. Mr. Middlerib put the bottle in bis coat-pocket and went into the house, eying everybody he met very suspicious ly, as though he had made up his mind to sting to death the first person who said “ bee” to him. Ho confided his guilty secret to none of bis family, lie hid liis bees in his bed-room, and as lie looked at them just before putting them away he half-wished the experiment was safely over. lie wished the im prisoned bees did not look so liot and cross. With exquisite care he sub merged the bottle in a basin of water and let a few drops in on the heated in mates to cool them off. At the tea table he had a great fright. Miss Middlerib, in the artless simplici ty of her romantic nature, said : ”“ I smell bees. How the odor brings up—” But her father glared at her and said, with superfluous harshness and execra ble grammar: “ Hush up ! You don't smell noth ing.” Whereupon Mrs. Middlerib asked him if be had eaten anything that disa greed with him, and Miss Middlerib said: “ Why, pa!” and Master Middlerib smiled as he wondered. Bed time at last, and the night was warm and sultry. Under various false pretences, Mr. Middlerib strolled about the house until everybody else was in bed, and then he sought his room, lie turned the night lamp down until its feeble ray shone dimly a3 a death light. Mr. Middlerib disrobed slowly— very slowly. When at last he was ready to go lumbering into his peaceful couch, he heaved a profound sigh, so full of apprehension and grief that Mrs. Middlerib, who was awakened by it, said if it gave him so much pain to come to bed, perhaps he had better sit up all night. Mr. Middlerib checked another sigh, but said nothing and crept into bed. After lying still a few mo ments be reached out and got his bot tles of bees. It was not an easy thing to do to pick one bee out of the bottleful with nis fingers, and not get into trouble. The first bee Mr. Middlerib got was n little brown hpney-bee that would not weigh half an ounce if you picked him up by the ears, but if you lifted him by the hind leg, would weigh as much ns the last end of a bay mule. Mr. Middlerib could not repress a groan. “ What's the matter with you ?" sleepily asked his wife. It is very hard Mr. Middlerib to say he only felt hot, but he did it. lie didn’t have to lie about it either, lie did feel very hot indeed. About eighty six all over, and one hundred and nine ty-seven on the end of his thumb. lie reversed the bee. and pressed the war like terminus of it firmly against the VOL. Ill —NO. 13. rheumatic knee. It didn't hurt so badly as he thought it would. It didn't hurt at all. Then Mr. Middlerib remembered that when the honey-bee stabs a human foe, it generally leaves its harpoon in the wound, and the invalid knew that the only thing this bee had to sting with was doing its work at the end of his thumb. lie reached his arm out from under the sheet, and dropped this disabled atom of rheumatism liniment on the carpet. Then, after a second of blank wonder, lie began to feel round for the bottle, and wonder what he did with it. In the meantime strange things had been going on. When he caught hold of the first bee. Mr. Middlerib, for rea sons. drew it out in such haste that for the time he forgot all about the bottle and its remedial contents, and left it lying uncorked in the bed, between himself and bis innocent wife. In the darkness there had been a quiet but general emigration from that bottle. The bees, their wings clogged with the water Mr. Middlerib had poured upon them to cool and tranqnilize them, were crawling aimlessly about over the sheet. While Mr. Middlerib was feeling around for it, his ears were suddenly thrilled and his heart frozen by a wild, piercing scream from his wife. “Murder!” she screamed, “murder! 0!i! help me ! Help! help!” Mr. Middlerib sat holt upright in bed. His hair stood on end. The night was w-arm, but he turned to ice in a minute. “ Where in thunder,” he said, with palid lips, as he felt all over the bed in frenzied haste— “ where in thunder are them infernal bees ?” And a large “ bumble,” with a sting as pitiless as the finger of scorn, just then climbed up the inside of Mr. Middlerib's night-shirt, until it got squarely between his shoulders, and then it felt for his marrow, and said, calmly: “ Here is one of them.” And Mrs. Middlerib felt ashamed of her feeble screams when Air. Middle rib threw up both arms, and, with a howl that made the windows rattle, roared : “Take him off! Oh, land of Scott, somebody take him off!” And, when a little honey-bee began tickling the sole of Mrs. Middlerib's foot, she so shrieked that the house was bewitched, and immediately' went into spasms. The household was aroused by this time. Miss Middlerib, Master Middle rib and the servants were pouring into the room, adding to the general confu sion by howling at random and asking irrelevant questions, while thoy gazed at the figure of a man a little on in age in along night-shirt, pawing fiercely at ilie unattainable spot in the middle of his back, while ho danced an unnatural, weird, wicked-looking jig by the dim, religious light of the night-lamp. And while lie danced and howled, and while they gazed and shouted, a navy-blue wasp, that Master Middlerib had put in the bottle for good measure and va riety, and to keep the menagerie stir red up, had dried his legs and wings with a corner of the sheet, and after a preliminary circle or two around the bed to get up His motion and settle down to a working gait, he fired himself across the room, and to his dying day Mr. Middlerib will always believe that one of the servants mistook him for a burglar and shot him. No one, not even Mr. Middlerib him self, could doubt that he wa3 at least for the time, most thoroughly cured of rheumatism. Ilis own boy could not have carried himself more lightly' or with greater agility'. But the cure was not permanent, and Mr. Middlerib does not like to talk about it. .Josh hillings on Editors. An editor is a male whose bizness it is to navigate a nuzepaper. He writes out editorials, grinds out poetry, insert deaths and wedins, sorts out manu sorips, keeps a waste basket, blows up the printer, steals matter, fites uther people’s battles, sells his paper for a dollar and fifty cents a year, takes peas and sorghum for pay when he can get it, raizes a large family, works nine teen hours out of twenty-four, knows no Sunday, gits abused hi everybody and oust in awhile whipt bi somebody, lives poor, dies middle-aged, and often broken-hearted, leaves no money, and iz rewarded for a life of toil with a free obituary notice in the nuzepapers. The American Flag. Whoever attempts to haul down the American Flag shoot him on the spot. Whoever attempts to flag the Ameri can Haul spot him on the shoot. Whoever attempts to shoot the Amer ican Spot haul him on the flag. Whoever attempts to haul the Ameri can Shoot flag him on the spot. Whoever attempts to spot the Ameri* can Flag shoot him on the snoot. The best lime on record—lunch time. ill'll# HARTWELL, GA„ WEDNESDAY. NOVEMBER 30, 1878. 1111.1.110Z1 MI AM. lIILLItOZIMI. Chronicle A Conetitvtionaliet. The attempt, partially successful at present, to array a solid North against a solid South will continue with vigor and pertinacity. It cannot be denied that the South is the bulwark of the Democratic party, and it is unfortu nately true that this is the one objec tionable feature which may make a Re publican President in 1880, seeing that the Senate and the House will be in opposition. We do not think any part of the country would have cause to re gret a return to power of the Democ racy. even under the circumstances stated ; but no pains will be spared to make the Eastern and Western masses so believe. We of the South have but to put ourselves in their places to un stand what a tremendous appeal this is to their still tender sensibilities and prejudices. We must make up our minds therefore that a prodigious strain will be put upon our patience, and that the chief argument used against us will lie the solidarity of such States as South Carolina and Mississippi. It is true that thousands of colored people are either not voting at all or voting with the Democrats ; audit is equally true that the Radicals themselves have established the consecration of a pre cedent that forbids going behind re turns. But, none the less, will they have a powerful weapon of offense in this matter and they will use it with all the vehemence of brains, wealth, and machinery in energetic combination. We should not passively bear these im putations, but we must keep our tem pers. There is ample room and oppor tunity to legitimately give blow for blow. When we are accused of intimi dating colored voters, we may. answer that if any diplomacy is used here it is not any worse, and not near so exten sive and reprehensible as that practiced in the North. General 11. F. Butler, in the concluding speech of his cam paign, shows how the Republican saints manage in sanctimonious Massachu setts. He said: “Intimidation of working men and employees of the strongest character was called for and vigorously used. Nearly a whole trade, the shoe and leather trade in Boston, the largest in the State, closed their stores on the day of election, that the merchants might watch and control the vo‘es of their clerks, partners and other departments.” The coercion of white men at the North is well known, but the saints pre tend that there is freedom of election everywhere but in the South, notwith standing the duress, legislative and in dividual, put upon thousands of men of their own blood and race. The New Orleans Democrat, referring to this very subject, bits the nail on the head when it says: “ Mr. Blaine and his friends knew not what they were doing when they gave the franchise to the negro. They' did not know that when the negro and the white man dwell to gether. one must rule. Where the ne gro rules, as DeTocqneville told them fifty years ago, the white man is anni lated. Where the white man predomi nates the negro survives, but as an in ferior. This is the law of Nature and of God; and Mr. Blaine, with the whole Radical party at his back, can neither change it nor alienate the sym pathies of the Northern white man from his Southern brother.” Autumn Tints. Josh Lilling*. Mankind are very proud of their judgments, but they arc az often con vinced against what they call’their judg ments az enny other way. The world all praze the philosoher, but toss their peuuys into the caps ov the monkeys. It iz alvvuss safe to follow the relig ious beleaf that our mothers taught us —there never waz a mother yet who taught her child to be an infidel. A sassy man iz either a koward or a phool —take your choice gentlemen. Whenever you cum akrust a man who distrusts everyboddy, you have found one that it iz safe for everyboddy to distrust. If you are in search ova man’s true karaekter, examine him at home by the fireside; there he iz the hero ov ocka shuns, and iz angelik or devilish in spite ov himself. Those who have real merit are alwuss the last ones to see it in themsclfs, and the first ones to see it in others. If 1 was going into the hermit bizzi ness, I would go into the heart of a grate city rather than into the heart of a mountain —a grate city iz a grate soli tude. Thare iz only one kind ov person who iz fit to liv in solitude, and that iz the one who iz capable of adorning enny posishun in society. Athens Chronicle: Another victim to the fascinations of the intoxicating cup. Mr. J. P. Piedgnr, one of the ope rators at Princeton factory, was found dead last Sunday morning, near the front entrance to the campus. The Coroner’s jury gave a verdict of death from excess in drinking whiskey. •• WOl I.IVT YOU r Ho told me my lips were the sweetest And fairest he ever had known, The bobolink envied my sinking. Ami the nightengalc mimicked its tone; My dimples they quarreled with cherries, Just under eyes tender and blue ; Mv tresses they angered the sunbeams, T smiled on him, •* wouldn’t yon?” • lie told me my Ungers were dainty, My lips only moulded to kiss, “ And wouldn't 1 give one of the sweetest For such a poor bauble as this?” Mavbe 1 ought not to have done it. lint he looked so beseeching and true, And the ring was so pretty I took it. And gave him a kiss. “ wouldn't you?” lie told me there was a dear little cottage •Just down near the roeks by the sea, Where the sweet roses nodded a welcome, And the mocking birds waited for me, With himself, of course, for a master — •Twas made plenty large for us two, I forgot what 1 said, but I'm thinking I kissed him again, “wouldn't you?” No Fraud Aluml Him. Detroit Free /Vi\yh. Yesterday when a benzineish-looking man entered a saloon on Grand River street and stated that lie felt like hav ing a shake of the ague, the bar-tender coldly replied that be might have four of them for all he eared. “1 have no money, and I must have a drink of gin or a shake of the ager,” continued the man “ No money no gin.” “Have you no heart?” appealed the stranger. “ Yes, sir, but it’s ten years since I saw a man with a shake, and 1 shall really enjoy your performance. Please let me know when the show begins.” “ It—it (shiver) will begin (shiver) right o-f-f!” stammered the man, and it did. Ilis lips turned blue, bis hands grew cold, and lie shook. At the first shake a brick fell from his coat-pockets. At the next an egg-plant was shaken from another. In about a minute lie shook down four onions, an empty oyster can, a ball of string, two new pie-tins, a stove-handle and about 20 cigar-stubs. Where they came from no one could see, but every shiver was accompanied by a rattle and din. “ Got it pretty hard,” remarked the snlodliist. “This is only the b-b-beginning,” shivered the man, as he backed up to the stove. There was no fire in it, and the pipe was shaken down in a minute. Iu tlie confusion two tables were upset and a decanter knocked off the counter, and a free fight ensued between five or six men. When peace reigned the man with ague was found on a barrel outside shaking so that the iron hoops rattled. You scoundrel!” shouted the sa loonist. “ Don't I s-shake?” inquired the man, “and can I help shaking?" “ You have damaged me SSO worth !” “ I’m s-sorrv, but didn’t I warn you, and d-didn’t you want to see this per per-perforinancc? Do you s’pose I'm a fraud, and that 1 ggo round per-per forming for nothin'? E-fifty dollars is my l-lowcst figger, sir, and I s-sornetimes get a hundred!” Paying in Promises. Abbeville. (S. C.) Medium. “I brought up some cotton to-day and sold it but I had to pay taxes, buy some provisions and settle up my guano ac count and am dead broke. 1 had in tended calling 'round and paying for my paper, but haven’t got the money just now—will be in town again some day and see what I can do for you.” “Hope deferred niaketh the heart sick,” and we are tired of such empty promises as this —the very cast wind of indefiniteness. Why have we to wait until every store account, guano bill and tax execution arc satisfied? If the paper ain’t worth the subscription price nobody will force you to take it, blit i don’t call around at the office and say you want it and that you will pay for it and then never do it. Our subscription | money, although it is but two dollars, is jof as much consequence to us as the merchant’s store account or the guano agent's bill. Publishing a newspaper is no child’s play. It is a constant, steady expense. It takes time and tal ent and money. It is an every-day, all year job, through storm and sun, week in and week out. The profits of the business, even under the most prosper ous conditions, are very small. Come; up, then, and pay your subscription, pay it promptly, pay it in full and pay it in money. Sell your wood to some body else and bring us the cash, turn your potatoes into money, drive your ducks to some other market. You wouldn’t think of paying your phy.-i- ■ cian in pinders or a lawyer in ’possum grease—why bring such trash to publish ers and try to palm it off on them for money they have worked for and hon estly earned. “ I will pay you in the fall ” and “ I’ll call’round again” ain't worth a cent. You can’t buy a box of blacking or a pound of cheese with any such currency. The Jens as a People The editor of the London Truth is himself a Jew, and a very able one, and he makes the following remarks; j “ 1 have never understood the touchiness of the Jews at being called Jews, even w hen the term is used rather ns a desig nation of race than opprobriotislv. I j see nothing to lie eitlier particularly ashamed of, or to bo particularly proud i of, in being a Jew. In England Jews have a great advantage over Christians, because while they have the advantage of being Englishmen, they also have the advantage of belonging to a power ful fraternity, hound together like Free Masons, ever ready to support any of its members. No people are more exclu sive than Jews, and no people have more marked traits of character. Let an Englishman and a Jew have the same fortune, and the latter will spend more than the former. Out of business they are more ostentatious, more liberal and more el aritablo than Christians. I would rather, with an eye to mv own interests, do business with a Christian than a Jew; but were Ia beggar, I would rather beg of a Jew than of a Christian. Curious Facts About liliiul Torn. An exchange has these interesting facts ; about “ Blind Tom,” the celebrated col ored pianist: Blind Tom’s birthplace is Georgia, and he began to excite atten tion ns a musician at the age of four years. All sounds afforded him delight; even the crying ofa child caused him to dance about in a state of ecstucy. When at home ho often bit and pinched his brothers and sisters to make them emit cries of pain. If kept away from the piano, lie would beat against the wall, drag chairs about the room, and make all sorts of noises. When in London a (lute was produced for him of a very complicated pattern, and having twenty two keys. He frequently rises up at night and plays this instrument, imitat ing upon it all sorts of sounds which he may hear at the time. Once, when an agent attempted to make him stop play ing a piano in a high-toned hotel at three o’clock in the morning, Tom seized him and threw him through the door. In Washington he threw a man down stairs who came into his room. When at home in Georgia he lives in a building nbo t two hundred yards from the house and there remains alone with his piano, play ing all day and night, likeone possessed with madness. Bad weather has an ef fect upon his music. In cloudy, rainy seasons, he plays sombre music in minor chord : and w hen the sun shines and the birds sing he indulges in waltzes and light music. (Sometimes he will hammer aw ay for hours, producing the most hor rid discords imaginable. Suddenly a change comes over him and lie indulges in magnificent hursts of harmony tikon from the best productions of the mas ters. He played nearly as well at the iige of seven as he does now. But now his repertoire is much larger, as he can play anything he lias ever heard. He now plays about seven thousand pieces, and picks up new ones everywhere. A Womau with a New Pair of Shoos. I’itfhburg Commercial Gazette. When a woman lias anew pair of shoes she performs altogether different from a man. She never shoves her toes into them and yanks and hauls until she is red iuthe face and all out of breath, and then goes stamping and kicking around, hut pulls them on partway carefully, twitches them off again to take a last look and see if she lias got the right one, pulls them on again, looks at them dreamily, says they are just right, then takes another look, stops suddenly to smooth out a wrinkle, twists around and surveys them sideways, ex claims: “Mercy, how loose they arc,” looks at them square in front, works her foot around so they won’t hurt her quite so much, takes them off, looks at the heel, the toe, then bottom and the inside, puts them on again, walks up and down the room once or twice, remarks to her better half that she won't have them at any price, tilts down the mirror to see how fhey look, turns in every possible direction, and nearly dislocates her neck trying to see how thoy look from that way, backs off, steps up again, takes thirty or forty farewell looks, says they make her feet look awful big and never will do in the world, puts them off and on three or four times more, and a.-ks her husband what he thinks about it, and then pays no attention to what he says, goes through it all again and final ly says she will take them. It's a very simple matter indeed. For severe burns, takeuuslackcd lime and pour water on it. When the water is drawn off clear, mix flax-seed oil with it until it becomes yellow and thick like syrup. Apply to burns at any stage, the earlier, however, the better. We publish this because we are confident it is tbe best application in severe cases, as well as slight burns. —South Georgia Agriculturist. The deaths from yellow fever in the South, since the commencement of the dreadful epidemic, now aggregate some thing over twelve thousand. There is no more irnplaceable enemy than hr who feels he has wronged you. WHOLE NO. 117. THE PEACEFUL REVOLUTION. What a All rend Vnrlliprii Hc|Mililicnu Hay* About It. &e*]lold't Letter lo Cincinnati Cumnrmal. The more I see of the condition of affairs here the more am I convinced of ' the utter and entire hopelessness of the attempt of the Republicans to do any thing as a party-. They had as well disband at once, make terms with the enemy and how to the inevitable. The record of the party is such, and the bitterness of the whites so great, that nothing hearing the Republican name can survive locally in power here. Un der our form of government there is absolutely no remedy for this, no way fo prevent a powerful and embittered minority from overcoming a weak and defenceless majority. South Carolina is lost to the Republicans, nnd will hereafter be as Democratic as Georgia. I asked the postmaster here, an in telligent colored man, if he also thought the case entirely hopeless. He said lie did. The Republican party was de parting this life in South Carolina about as fast as anything lie knew of. If it was lawful and possible to station flic whole United States army in the State, with a detachment in each dis rict, the party might l>e saved so long ns the army remained, but, the moment the army was withdrawn, down would conic the w hole fabric.* It can't stand alone any more than an empty- hag in u heavy wind. If there was no other objections, (and there are many) Congress has forbidden he use of the army for such purposes, and prosecutions under a section of the Revised Statutes don’t amount to a row of pins. So there is no wav hut to fold our arms under the I Constitution and see the Republican party in South Carolina ground into the sand. But it's an ill wind that blows no good. With the end of the party here will end the race antagon ism. the riots, the outrages, ami the massacres. These have long since ceased in Georgia and in every' other Southern State where the Republican party has not vexed the white people by existing. The hopeless condition of the blacks here is last drawing upon them, and they are bowing to the inevi table. Hence the formation of Demo cratic clubs among thorn, and their “cheers” for the Democratic speakers. But those only come from the throat. In his heart the darkey wishes the grand old Democratic party in per dition. The North, whence they look ed for support has abandoned them. State after State has wheeled into the Democratic column, and they' submit, as they- submitted in slavery, because it is their nature. Indeed, if [ was a South Carolina negro, owning no prop erty hilt seven ol.il Iren and two dogs, (which is the average,) and working for ten dollars a month, I don't believe I would risk my- life and alienate my white neighbors in an etfort to keep John Patterson in the United States Senate. The very presence of l’alter son in official position has caused many a poor darkev to suffer. When the whites look at this man they feel like killing six niggers. Nothing less will alford an escape-valve for their pent-up leeli ngs. The Champion. Virginia (A’<**.) Chronicle. “Thelaziest duffer I ever seed,” re marked Jim Blodgers, “were a man that the hoys used to call Old Laydown. They couldn't find out his fust name, cause lie were too lazy to recollect it. lie b’longed to the same sekret society ns me mid we paid him $lO a week ben efits for three weeks. Said he hurt his leg. Found afterwards by the doctor, and a dozen eye witnesses that he in jured his shins l>v walkin’ up agin a cob web. Fact. Lazy? You bet lie were easy goin.’ One afternoon he fainted in the street and were brought home to bed. We weren't to be catclied this week on benefits. Baid he had fainted from loss of blood. Doctor examined liim and found a mosquito bite under bis left ear. Fact. You bet he took things comfortably. He used to lure a small boy in warm weather to hold his straw for him while he sucked his sherry cobbler. Axed me one day if there weren't some cheap way of work in’ a tooth-brush by machinery. Said lie wished he could eat without workiu’ his jaws—'feared they would wear out too soon. Fact. Well, I don’t mind if I do. Woman’s Loro for the Beautiful. Virginia (Xev.) Chronicle. A woman went into a barber shop on C. street some weeks ago and wanted to know how much it would cost to dye a man’s Hair and moustache. The price was named, and she then asked the bar ber to get his dye and follow her. “ Why can’t the man come here?” asked the barber. ‘‘He’s dead,” replied the woman, “and the last thing he said when ho was passing away, was : ‘ Sally, fix me up pretty for the funeral.” Ilis hair curled beautifully, but was a little gray. “ It wont look well to sec a woman cry ing round a coffin with an old gray bearded man in it. So I want him fix ed up a little. He was always a beauty when he had his hair dyed. I know I’d want mine fixed that way if I was gray and dead.” The barber dyed the man’s hair in the highest styfe of the art, and the widow remarked, when all was over, that “He was the loveliest corpse ever buried on the Comstock.” Fall openings—chestnuts.