Newspaper Page Text
GENERAL L. J. GARTRELL.
A ttriof Mkrlrli of ||„ |ni*llr < *rr*. r .
CorrnpmdtHt* ThvniatriUt Enter prut
sln. Editor: From an editorial no.
pearing in your paper, the following is
an extract: “Many papers in North
Georgia are talking of General Gartrell
for Governor. General Gartrell is a
clever gentleman and an able criminal
lawyer. Will some of bit friends, who
are urging him as thelnan for the nom
ination, give light on the question of
his qualities ns a statesman, or any
other qualifications, that peculiarly fit
him for the position of Governor ?"
As you kindly call on “some of the
friends” of General Gartrell “to give
light on the question of his qualities as
a statesman, or anv other qualifications
that peculiarly fit him for the position
of Governor." we doubt not von will
take pleasure in publishing this answer
to your own inquiry.
Gen. Gartrell is a native of Wilkes
county, and was educated at Randolph
MAcon college, in Virginia, and Frank
lin college, at Athene, Georgia. lie
read law under General Robert Toombs,
was admitted to the bar in 1842 and
Nettled at Washington, Georgia, where
he soon rose to prominence in his pro
fession. He formed a partnership there
with the Hon. Isaiah T. Irwin, a prom
inent member of the bar of that sec
tion, and later was the partner of the
lamented Judge Garnet Andrews, who.
for rnanv years, graced the bench In
ins ability and impartiality. In 184$
General Gartrell was elected, by the
general assembly, solicitor-general of
the northern judicial circuit and dis
charged the duties of that position for
nearly four years with acknowledged
ability and fidelity until the summer of
1847,-when he was chosen by his fel
low-citizens of Wilkes county to rep
resent them in the legislature. For the
next term he was re-elected, and dur
ing his whole term of service in that
body took an active part in the debates
and in the enactment of all general
laws for the benefit, of the people, and j
as the rseords of the house and the |
comments of the public press at the)
time will show, discharging, his duties j
to the entire satisfaction of hisconsfit- j
uents, and attracting the attention of;
the people all over the state by his
ability as a legislator.
After thus serving the people for
four years, he continued the practice of
his profession in the Northern circuit
with great success until 1854, when he
removed to Atlanta, where he has since
resided
In the celebrated contest between
Hon. Hiram Warner and lion. B. 11.
Hill for congress in 1855 he took an
active part in the interest of Judge
Warner, the democratic candidate, by
bis efforts, contributing largely to
Judge War net's jplpSinii, a'nd In 1-8 50.
being appointed presidential elector on
the Buchanan Ureckehridge ticket, he
canvassed his district and other por
tions of the state in favor of their elec
tion, and cast his vote, as a member of
the electoral college, for those able and'
distinguished democrats.
11 is efforts on the stump during these
campaigns are well remembered by
thousands of our people as having been
exceedingly powerful and effective.
Judge Warner declined a re-election to
congress in 1857, when (ten. Gnrtrell
was nominated and elected by a large
majority, though the district was one
of those most closely contested and in
1850, he was re-elected by a large in
creased majority. Whiltrin the federal
congress, where he remained until tiie
state seceded, he was a member of the
committee on elections, was regent of
the Smithsonian institute, took an ac
tive part in the most important debates
of these eventful sessions, and was, on
all hands, regarded as one of the most
prominent members of that memorable
•ongress. After Georgia had with
drawn from the union and develop
i 1 it certai“ ' hat war was
moots render*-.. L c . . .
inevitable, returning to ~M S n:ltlve
lie raised the celebrated Seventh C eor *
gia regiment, was unanimously elected
its colonel and with it entered the con
federate army. While absent in the
army with his command he was elected
to tiie confederate congress and resign
ed his commission to take his seat in
that body in 1862 with the understand
ing on his parr, that he would remain
In congress but one term. In this
congress, composed of the very ablest
southern statesmen, he was made chair
man of the judicial committee —being
Assigned to that position by Speaker
SWvoek, tlint eminent Virginian—thus
filling the most important station in t he
lower branch of the confederate con
gross. It was a time demanding the
work of full grown statesmen and hero
General Gartell was fully tried and
found to be worthy and well qualified,
for here he rendered most valuable and
timely service bn the confederate cause
as is shown bv the journals aud remem
bered by his fellow members.
Declining a re-election to congress,
he re-entered the army, was made brig
adier-general and organized Gartrell’s
brigade. which he commanded to the
clo.-e of the war.
Of l)ia life and conduct since the war
it is hardly needful to say anything.
Although at all times taking a deep in
terest in political affairs, he Ims de
voted himself to the practice of his
profession, and none who have witness
ed Ids devotion to duty, his untiring
industry and his almost matchless abil
ity in this useful and honorable sphere
can doubt his capacity for public posi
tion. y llia voluntary and gratuitous de
fense of the Columbus prisoners, charg
ed with the assassination of Asiiliurn,
endeared him to our whole people, and
The 11 art well Sun.
Bv BENSON & McGILL.
VOL. IV—NO. Its.
entitles him to the gratitude of lovers
of liberty and justice everywhere. His
zealous deft use of hundreds of Geor
gians in the federal courts has proven
their best, and often only, mode of es
cape from improper conviction for al
leged infractions of the revenue laws.
Could your people have heard him.
as we have in the court-house in de
fense of the life, liberty and property
rights of his clients, and on the stump
in defense of democratic principles,
they would not need to be told of his
qualifications for gubernatorial office.
General Gartrell was selected to make
the opening effort in the Tilden and
Hendricks's campaign in 187 G, and
right nobly did lie discharge this patri
otic duty, fully demonstrating the im
portance and necessity of democratic
victory, and affording fine proof of his
own familiarity with the principles un
derlying our complex system of gov
ernment and controlling its operations
when properly administered.
In 1877. ex-Governor Charles J. Jen
kins. that grand old Georgian, with
whom years before General Gartrell
served in the state legislature, made
him chairman of the committee on the
executive department in the constitu
tional convention—one of its most im
portant committees. Here he did good
work for the people, as the published
journals fully attest—having contribu
ted very largely to the adoption of the
measures guarding the public treasury,
and to the good features of the consti
tution framed bv tlmt bodr.
It will be remembered that this con
vention largely reduced the immense
patronage of the executive, provided
for the enactment of laws regulating
freight and passenger tariff on rail
roads, and checked the nccnmulntian of
county and municipal indebtedness,
besides adopting many other whole-
some economy measures. In fine. Mr.
Editor, General Gartrell has been tried
in many very important public trusts,
and has so filled them as always to sat
isfy the people who placed him there
His private business has always been
been successfully managed, and he has
never failed to promote the just inter
ests of those relying upon his profes
sional skill. A man of untiring in
dustry; of -excellent administrative
v-r—siving needed 'attention to mi
nute details—comprehending at the
same time the largo and seemingly
more important elements of affairs;
acquainted with the wants of and in
full sympathy with the masses ; capac
itated bv natural endowment; enrich
ed by liberal education and matured by
the experience of years of active pub
lic life to suggest needed measures of
relief; acquainted with the laws and
therefore able to enforce them infelli
gentlv and to require others to faith
fully discharge their duties under them,
he is the kind of man the people want
for governor. Among all the promi
nent Georgians mentioned in connec
tion with the governorship who pxccls
him in capacity, integrity, or devotion
to the public weal ? Justice.
A Demand for Men Eighteen Feet Long.
A Northern soldier who served in the
swamps of Smith Carolina during the
war toils the following stnrv : Among
the officers whom I remember well at
Morris Island was Colonel Sewell, of
New York, a most excellent officer and
an accomplished engineer. Col. Sewell
was engaged on the Swamp Angel, and
being very energetic himself, he was
iK;t afraid to enter the swamps. His
prise can S' imagined when one dav
one of his iie;! e,,a "ts wu.'*™ * ie had or
dered to take twenty met) and enter *ne
swamp, said he could not do it.
“ And why, sir. cant you do it?" cried
the energetic Sewell.
••The mud is too deep, Colonel.” re
plied the lieutenant.
“You can at least try,” said Sewell.
The lieutenant did so, and in an hour
returned, his men covered with mud
from head to foot.
“ Here, now,” cried Sewell, on seeing
them, “ what bring* you back?”
“ Colonel, the mud is over my men’s
heads. I can’t do it.”
“Oh, hut you can make a requisition
for anything that is necessary for the
safe passage of the swamp, and I will
give it to you, but you must go through
with it.”
The lieutenant did make a requisition
in writing, which was as follows :
“I want twenty men eighteen feet
long to cross a swamp fifteen feet deep.”
The joke was a good one, hot Sewell
was terribly in earnest? could not just
then appreciate it, and he promptly ar
rested the lieutenant for disrespect to
his superior officer. Another lieutenant
was detailed, and he went to the swamp,
felled the Jimber, and accomplished
what his unfortunate predecessor had
failed to do. Col. Sewell built his bat
tery with the aid of wheeMmrrows and
-ami. and the remains of it still stand as
a monument to his energy and skill ns
an engineer.
A friend of ours remarks that the
reason the softer sex call the men
bears is because they hug the girls so
tight. There'* logic by the armful.
HAKTWELL, GA., WEDNESDAY. MAY 19, 1880.
How a Married Woman Goes to Sleep.
There is an nrtiolo going the mu mis
entitled, “ How Girls Go tn Sleep."
The manner in which they go to sloop,
according to the article, can’t hold a
candle to the way a married woman yes
to sleep. Instead of thinking of what
she should have attended tn before go
ing to bed, she thinks of it afterward.
While she is revolving these matters in
her mind, and while snugly lucked in
bed, the old matt is scratching his legs in
front of the fire, and wondering how he
will pnv the next month's rent. Sud
! dcnlv she savs :
“ Janies, did vou lock the door?"
“ What dvir?”
“ The cellar door,” says she.
“ No,” savs James.
“ Well, you'd better go down and
, lock it, for I heard someone in the back
yard last night.”
Accordingly, James paddles down
stairs and locks the door. About the
time James returns and is going to get
into bed she rcmnrks :
“ Did you shut the stair door?"
“ No,” savs James.
“Well, if it is not shut the eat will
get tip into the room.”
“Let her come up, then," says James,
ill-naturedlv.
“ Mv goodness, no !" returns the wife,
“ she’d suck the hahy’s breath !”
Then James paddles down stairs again
and steps on a tack, nn<( closes the stair
door, and curses the cat. and returns to
the bed-room. Just ns bebpgihs to'
climb into hisci tub bis wife observes:
“ I forgot to bring up some water,
j Suppose you bring some in the big tin."
And so James, with a muttered curse
goes down into the dark kitchen, and
falls over a chair, and rasps all of the
tinware off the wall, in search of the
“ big ” tin, and then he jerks the stair
door open and howls:
“ Where the deuce are the matches?”
She gives him minute directions where
to find the matches, and adds that she
would rather go and get the water her- J
self than have the neighborhood raised .
about it. After which Janies finds the j
matches, procures the water, mines up i
stairs, and plunges into bed. Present- j
ly bis wife says:
“James, let's have an understanding
about money matters. Now, next week i
I’ve got* to*pay—.’’
“I don’t know what you've got to j
pay, and I don’t care,” shouts James, as
he lurches around and jams his face up
against the wall; “all I want is to go
to sleep.”
“ That’s all very well for yon,” snaps |
his wife, as she pulled the covers vici
ouslv, “ voif never think of the worry j
and trouble I have. And there's A ra
mi nta. who I believe is taking the
measles.”
“ Let her take ’em,” savs James,
sticking his legs, out as straight as two !
ramrods.
“ It seems to me yon have no sense
or feeling,” whines his wife, “and if
you had any respect for me you would
not eat onions before you come to bed.
The atmosphere of the room from the
smell of onions is horrid ”
“ Well, go down and sleep in the
kitchen, then, and let me alone,” says
James.
Hereupon she begins to erv softly,
hut about the time James is falling in
to a gentle doze she punches him in the
ribs with her elbow, and says :
“ Did von hear that scandal about
Mrs. Jones?”
“What Jones, says James sleepily.
“ Why, Mrs. Jones.”
“ Where?” inquired James.
“I declare!” says his wifi* “you're
getting more stupid every day. You
km? w Mrs. Jones that lives at No. 21.
Well, day before yesterday. Susan
Smith told Mrs. Tliorrnson that Sain
Baker had said that Mrs. Jones had— '
Here she pauses and listens. James
is snoring in profound slumber. With
a sort of rage she pulls all the covers
off him, wraps herself up in them and
lavs awake until 2 a. m.. thinking how
badly abuse 1 she is. And that is the
way a married woman goes to sleep.
Thomaston Times: We saw this
week the greatest curiosity we have
ever seen. We allude to Mr. Zaok
Gaultney, of Taylor county, the Geor
gia dwarf. He is undoubtedly the
worst deformed person we have ever
seen. He is twenty-five years old and
is only forty-six inches high. His gen
eral weight is one hundred and five
pounds, of which his hands and feet
will weigh half. His little finger is
fourteen inches in circumference, which
will give you some idea of the enorm
ous proportions of his hands and feet.
One of his hands will weigh at least
twelve or fifteen pounds. He converses
fluently, and seems to be intelligent and
well informed. This is his first visit
to Thomaston. Everybody who saw
him seems to he at a loss to account
for this singular phenomenon.
A few years since, at the celebra
tion of onr national anniversary, a poor
pedlar who was present, being called
upon for a toast, offered the following:
“ Here is health to poverty; it sticks
to a man when all his friends forsake
him”
Devoted to Hart County.
■of all the hnrfible accident* wo could
hear nf. but still lie laughed and iHiigh
' ciK * Mnltr'iii'e <vta eqnrtllv useless, and
there seemed nothing lint death foy him.
j He could not eat, drink or sleep ; noth- \
ing but laugh. Ilis mouth stretched
twice its usual width and his jaws were
almost paralyzed. 1 got your paper j
( and commenced reading your column
Jof comics to him. Before I got to the
lend of the first one I could notice an
improvement in him and by the time I
had got half slirough the column bis
mouth was entirely closed and he was
as cairn as ever, lie lias never laugh
ed since, and I don’t believe lie ever
will. That is the cause of my grati- j
tude. Is it not enough?"
The publisher thought so, and con
cluded to dispense with the original col
umn of funny paragraphs.
How to Cure a Toothache.
All tfie Year Round.
Some months ago an English tourist,
lingering in a country church-yard, was
present at a funeral, and observed
among the group of mourners a young
man. who particularly attracted atten
tion by his swollen face, and the utter
dejection of his appearance. “ Here
at least is one true mourner,” thought
the Englishman. While this thought
was passing through his mind the sup
posed mourner took up a skull which
lay on the top of a heap of dry mold
and crumbled bones. lie raised it to
bis lips, and, with bis own teeth, ex
tracted a tooth from it. Horror filled
the stranger as he watched this pro
ceeding, and saw him throw the skull
carelessly away, while he wrapped the
tooth in paper and put it in his pocket.
“Can you tell me why he did that ?”
asked our tourist of an old inan who
had stood beside him during the fnrie
ral ceremony. “ Ay, surely, your hon
or; the poor boy was very bad wi’ the
toothache, an’ it’s allowed to he a cure
if you draw a tooth frae a skull wi’
your ain teeth. lie’ll sew the tooth in
his clothes an’ wear it as long as he
lives.” “ You don’t tell me so! Do
you think the remedy will be effectual?”
“ It’s like enough, sir,” replied the old
man, showing where a tooth was sewed
in the lining of his own waistcoat.
“ It’s five years since I pulled that one
the same way, and I never had a touch
o’ the toothache since.”
Girls in the M ine Vats.
A resident in Italy vouches for the
following: In the vineyards in Paru
g, : ;i the gil ls mount ladders and clip the
rich humi.es, dropping them into the
baskets. With industrious workers one
day is enough to clear ml average vine
yard. When the grapes are ail gathered
in they are carefully picked from their
stems for the pressing. This last process
is the same primitive, simple operation
that was performed by the patriarch
Noah. The grapes arc thrown into an
enormous vat, where the juice is trnmp
vd out of them by the bare feet. At
this stage of the vintage you may see j
hundreds of young ladies of the city of
Perugia coming fourth in groups in the j
morning, beaming with pleasant mys
tery and excitement.
Your ordinary tourist whose only in
tellectual and instructive pabulum is
gathered from the guide books, has not
the remotest conception of their object. 1
He may think they are out for an early
| constitutional. But early constitution
als are not the rage with Italian ladies.
.Shall I tell you the secret of all that
mystery and excitement? They are off
to the country to tread in the wine press
es. It is a novel holiday to them, be
sides being a most salutary exercise.
; Even prim old dowagers are known to
“ wade in” and banish the rheumatism
by a half day’s exercise in the wine
press. Apart from the, healthful exer
cise of tramping, the new mash nrt as
The Ftinti) Column.
Camden
A city paper thought it must do like
its neighbors and have a paragraph col
umn. It advertised for the right sort of
a man in his way. “ Wages no object.
Good looks not desirable. Good sense
not expected.” The man came mid
went to work. One column was bis task,
and be furnished it. It looked well as
printed, and the publisher hom'd for
good resets. During the following day
a plain-looking farmer came in and ask
ed the editor for the man who wrote
that column. The paragrapher was im
mediately summoned.
“ It on are the author of this column,
I hear," said the farmer.
"Yes, sir," proudly rubbing his
hands.
“1 owe yon a debt which I can only
partly repay in money, hat here are So
which I insist on vour taking as an indi
cation of the gratitude I feel toward
you.”
The man of paragraphs took it and
asked what was the especial cause of
gratitude.
The farmer said : “ You saved my
brother’s life after he had been given up
by the doctor. It was this way : He was
takisi last Monday with a fit of laughing
hysterics which got worse and worse.
We hud tried everything in vain ; had
taken him to funerals, deathbeds, scenes
$1.50 Per Annum.
a hath to the limbs, while the uprising
fumes are considered eminently utoWtUch
ic. After the trending performance
these ladies wash themselves in hot
wine, taking a moderate decoction inter
nally for the stomach’s sake. The ef
fect is pleasant and rejuvenating, and is
especially noticeable in the vim witli
which they participate in the dance,
which is the usual sequel to treading in
the wine press.
Beauty at Auction.
“Grandfather Ackley, of the village
of Watkins, N. Y., had rather a novel
experience recently while “crying off"
a vendue in the town of Hector, near
Revnoldsville. After disposing of the
articles on the sale list there was a lull
in business and the crowd was getting
impatient waiting for “Grandfather"
to “ come down," or rather announce
tiie close "of the sale, when a pretty,
plump, rosy girl asked him to oiler her
to the highest bidder. “Grandfather,”
being of a modest, retiring disposition,
seemed reluctant, hut the girl insisted,
iso lie proceeded to “cry" her off. The
first bid was offered by a timid young
man w ith n pianissimo voice, who weak
ly offered $77). A bald-headed man
“went him fifty better" and the bidding
went along lively until 82,000 was of
; feted. At this juncture the girl’s father
■* went a thousand better ".and “Grand
father" closed the hid to that gentle
man. “Grandfather" looked the crowd
of young men over, and, raising himself
up in a dignified wav, proceeded to nil
dress them in the fnllwning manner:
“Gentlemen, 1 am surprised, miv more,
deeply mortified to think that you should
let such a prize slip through your builds
fi>r such a paltry sum. Why, do you
know this young lady would, if married,
get up in the morning and make a fire
without jarring the floor enough to wake
her lord and master up; and further
more, if I was as young as some of you,
I would swim the whole length of Sen
eca Luke, climb a liberty-pole, throw
the pole away and climb up fifty feet
farther rather than lose the opportunity
you fellows have." It is needless to say
the assemblage roared with laughter.
The House that Itiini Built.
The Almshouse : This is the house
that rum built.
The Drunkard: This is the beast
Hint lives in the house that rum built.
Intoxicating Drink : This is the ser
pent in flowery guise, with artful tongue
and dazzling eyes, that welds the chain
that binds the beast that lives in the
house that rum built.
The Grogshop : This is the monster
who holds the rein over the serpent
who welds the chain that binds the
beast in cruel pain that lives in the
house that rum built.
The Beer Saloons : These are the de
mons of the land, who hold the mon
ster at their commajid, and to the ser
pent they do say, together we will take
our way, and weld the chain so strong
ly now, that every beast to us shall
Bow, and dwell in the house that rum
built.
Temperance: This is the star of
promise bright, to stop the demons in
their delight, to scare the monster in
his career, and to the serpent lend a
fear, that he no more may weld the
chain that binds the beast in bis artful
train, who lives in the house that rum
built.
Reformers: These arc the soldiers
who take the field with the star of
promise for their shield ; they go to
gether hand in hand, to hunt the de
mons who haunt the laud ; they'll break
in two the welded chain, and set the
captive free again, who lives in the house
that rum built.
Imprisonment by I’iemntiih
A good story is told of Judge Kent.
A man was indicted for burglary, and
the evidence on the trial showed that
this burglary consisted in cutting a hole
through a rubber tent, in which several
persons were sleeping, and then pro
jecting his head and arm through the
j,ole and abstracting various articles of
value. It was claimed by his counsel
that, inasmuch as he never actually en
tered into the tent with his whole body,
he had not committed the offense
charged, and must, therefore, be dis
charged. Judge Kent, in reply to this
plea, told the jury that, if they were
not satisfied that the whole man was
involved in the crime, they might bring
in a verdict of guilty against so much
of him as was thus involved. The jury-,
after a few moments of consultation,
found the right arm, the right shoulder
and the head of the prisoner guilty of
the offense of burglary. The Judge
sentenced the right arm, the right
shoulder and hood to imprisonment at
hard labor in the State Prison for two
years, remarking that, as to the rest of
his body, he might do with it what he
pleased.
A young lady sent twenty-five cents
and a postage stamp in reply to an ad
vertisement of “ How to make an im
pression," and received an answer,
“ Sit down on a pan of dough ?”
WHOLE NO. 191.
WANTED A FIDDLE
A mnn from Sooth Arkansas stop|M-d
his wagon near the edge of the side
walk, in Little Rock.climbed down and
entered an undertaker’s establishment ;
“ Are you the man that sell#coffins?"
he asked a the undertaker advanced
to meet him.
“Yes, sir; can I do anything for
yon.'"
" Yes, 1 ettm in for a sort rtf busi
ness transaction, but I reckon I’ll hnve
to enter into particulars in order to
the thing clear. My father, the old
man, was a mighty curious sort of a
feller. I<ong time ago lie tuck into his
head that lie was gwinc to die, and ns
he was a religious man and ready for
death, lie thought, the next heat tiling
was to arrange for Ids burial, so he’
made himself a coffin outen white oak
, skantlin, The war com on and he went.
At Shiloh he got killed and never need
ed his coffin. I’ve got it out here in
the wagon. Shall I bring It In?"
“ No, sir; I don’t care to sec it."
“ You see this is a ground hog case
with me. F had intended to keep the
coffin nil my life, because I thought a
grent deal of the old man. and wouldn’t
have consented to part with it only for
this reason : My house burned down
night lieforelnst and burned np my fid
dle. The coffin happened to lie over
at. a neighbor*, and of course wasn’t
burned. This neighbor found out that
the coffin held just six bushel* of shell
ed corn, and every time he sells corn
lie borrows it. Now, you see, bavin
lost my fiddle I am ruined. I can’t
even cat. When my wife died that
fiddle kept me from the expense of
mnrryin agin. I’ve got, to have another
fiddle, and if you’ll get me a fiddle I’ll
give you the coffin. Oh. she’s a stun
ner, and will (it nine men out of ten.
She’s perfectly clean, for corn don’t
hurt a coffin, f put down bacon in her
one year, hut kept her under the drip
n long tim ‘ afterwards. Come what
do you say?"
“ I don’t wan* your coffin.”
“ I’ll bet you haven’t not a coffin in
the house that will wear ns well. Give
I inei a fiddle, and take her. Iron hoop*
around the. head, and three spikes at
[the foot; can’t break it."
“ 1 have too many on band now.”
“ And you'll always have ’em on
hand unless you get the right kind.
Nothing abort of a fiddle will get her.
No banjos or horns, nothing but n fid
dle. Speak out. Do you want the
coffin? Iron hoop around the head.
Do you want her? Holds water like a
| bucket, Don't leak a drop. Fit any
body. Got more fine points than any
coffin over brought to l.ittle Rock. Do
you want her?”
“ No.”
“ Won’t raffle her off for me?”
“ No.”
“ Won’t take a chance if I raffle her
off?”
“ No."
“ Then, sir. I have no sympathy
with yon whatever. You don't appre
ciate a good thing. You haven’t soul
enough to sec the beauties of mechani
cal art. You haven’t sense enough to
tell a hickory stump from a dogwood
snpliir”
The coffin will cither be taken
home or rallied off at ft fair.
•
Retrace of Worldly Compromise.
It is getting to be too much the fash
ion to compromise. A compromise
may do in politics -though even there
it rarely works well long. But, as some
one has well said, “ on moral and reli
gions questions a compromise is treas
on to light.” Lafayette once illumi
nated the compromise in this way:
“ Two men get into an altercation
about arithmetic. Twice two are four
says one stoutly. No, replies the oth
er, twice two are six. Both are un
yielding, and the dispute waxes warm.
A.third person approaches, and lays a
hand gently upon each. Gentlemen,
he says, reason is not infallible. The'
wisest and best men have erred. We
arc all prone to rush to extremes. You
my friend, affirm that twice two are
four. You who are equally my friend,
affirm that twice two are six. Compro
mise, my friends, compromise. Meet
each other haif way. Agree to say,
hereafter, twice two are five.
It is thus that too many Christians
ar: trying to compromise. God says.
Thou shalt love the Lord thy God w ith
all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and
with all thy mind. The compromising
Christian says, ” I will love Him with
half my heart, and with the other half
I will love the world.” Compromising
Christians go further. They go with
the world and pursue their pleasures
six and a half days of the week, and
quiet their consciences by a half day’s
attendance at church, when the weather
is fine and they fee! in the right mood.
Their piety “hath this extent, no
more.”
• Johnny, where's your pa?”
‘■Gone fishing, sir.”
“He was fishing yesterday, wasn’t
he ?”
“ Yes, sir.”
“ What did lie catch ?”
“ One catfish, the rheumatism, two
eels, the toothache, and some little
ones. Ma says he’ll catch hell to
night; just wait till he gets home.”
A little girl who was sent out to look
for eggs came back unsuccessful, and
complained that “ there wore lots of
hens standing around and doing noth
ing.”
“ I’m a moderate drinker,” asserted
an old toper to a temperance lecturer,
who was trying to induce him to re
form ; •' I only take one drink a? a
lime.”