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HE CARNESV1LLE ADVANC E, CARNESVILLE, GEORGIA.
Bliicial Brian Of Franklin Gcunfy.
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•is ' >tlm Pure 'll Editor
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J< MONTHS • I • • • I i I • 1 • I • • i I u
f m MGiiTKS • • • • • » • • • • • • O • • •
Enterd at tin; 1 *sL Oiiico at 1 '.irni'sv:i!i», (»eor”ia »:s Second
" «t to ’.
The bell .. rents make progress by
f et. not mil lea.
All 3 lost-’ 1 met) arc having
fashion chows n.v,
arr : t half so tired of
U_ men in the trenches.
Per. hunts are to be made smaller
.a oi tiller Why not make the hole
la rger ?
' : o far as the iir: i.s bands are eon-
ned, tile elet lions do not come a bit
t a often
A deadly parnbel of the various of-
li:ial war rcpt.rl-; would be more dead-
!; than parallel.
lost European rulers will find their
names prominently inscribed in. the
ot! r.- black books.
rho. all-wool suits made of vege-
t ht to nicely with a turn-
U J utid carroty hair
\ ot 1 g depresses a chap caught in
r on- niy’j) territory so much as to
1 adti ‘sst (1 as “Old Scout!”
>* 0 v rtheless, there are parts of Eu
rt v here the American free-lunch
c.t nter would make a decided hit.
''lie Host thing for a vessel threat¬
en! <! v. i'li destruction is to disguise
itself k ■ antly as a Swiss warship.
\ mouth or ;:in will serve a useful
P post if it makes a soldier in the
tr idles forget that his feet are wet.
There is nothing more pathetic
about, the last rose of summer than
tk re is about the last chunk of winter
cc 1.
On the principle that taking one’s
ur brelia along prevents rain, building
q. ike-j oof cities ought to
er.rthqutn:es.
A soldier’s description of a shower
b; th In one of the trenches shows how
m ;n’s ingenuity can ameliorate the
h 'Tors of war.
\s time goes on the number of men
w io are proud to have the bartender
c: 1 them by their first name grows
st -adily smaller
Monte Carlo reports decreased rev-
ei .tea as a result of the war, but this
is a “horror of war" that the world i
vi ws with equanimity.
■\ hen our prominent writers are not | i
at .-ertising smoking tobacco they are
P’ reha,-ung particular kinds of auto¬
mobiles. It is a hard life.
1 lie old-fashioned man who used to 1
h; 11'” seven laps ahead of his income | I
’. been forced by hard times to re-
ch.ce the distance to three laps. | !
The public is warned against wash-
it’-', its hair with soap Sound advice.
A" - ays mix water with it, except when
tin quality of soap is at hand.
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Our line of Furniture is^as good'and stylish as can be found anywhere, but our prices are cheaper regardless of
the war. We want to sell you and*we are a prepared to do so.
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CA KNEb^/1LLJHJ, GEORGIA.
The her. owife Is never among the
unemployed.
The new year and the old grouch
are incompatible.
Keep amoving if you would be
happy and live long.
Wliat is less noisy than a war seare
(hut failed to explode?
Domestic peace is often interrupted
over a scrap of green paper.
A four-year-old horse is still coltish.
How is it with a four-year-old auto"
However, when Medicine Hat does
have zero weather it passes it along
A good many aeroplane ascensions
have been made in the baseball war.
Some men go through life without
evdi knowing the comfort of a shirt
that fits.
A lecturer inquires: ”Is civilization
a disease?” It seems to be worse
than that
Xot always is the man who makes
the most money the best off at the end
of the year.
Only a bone-headed European poli¬
tician will oppose pensions a few
years hence.
The European war may go on until
j • some debating society settles it, one
j way or another.
! "No nows is good news’ does not
! i necessarily apply when there is a
j military censor on Juty.
I j A pessimist is a man who is worry¬
ing about how Europe will bo divided
j up when the war l9 over .
A merry liver and a happy stomach
go hand in hand, if we may express
it in that allegorical way.
|
j Yen can't judge the girls by their ap-
pearance in fashionable clothes. Some
of t! n are really smart.
Those deep-sea photographers should
hurry up and furnish us with the pic¬
ture of a mermaid's boudoir.
However, none of the nations has
, f " U!;d , !t necessary 80 far t0 ' h£t P ,ow *
shares as eentraband of war. j
:
The old-fashioned man who used to
let one leg hang out the side of his
buggy now toots a motor horn.
N 0t a11 !! U :r;; ey in th ° TIT, 13 T '
' . lSal1 t d 111 baeelul! playeis. , A Holstein *
bul1 was soU1 tliC othcr tIay lor § 26 * 000 -
I
Geologists declare the ea th is one
hundred million years old. And yet it
looks bright and new every sunshiny
morning.
Too much codiality is dangerous.
A western man has to pay $500 for
breaking another man’s finger in
shaking hands.
| Why is it that nn nrctJc cxnlorrr
ways lectures in winter. whereas
. could ns easily call around in
f when his subject would bo so much
more interesting.
A Massachusetts man has received
j only ment fifteen asking answers for perfect to his Prob¬
j a wife.
ably the rest of them are busy look-
in;; fer perfect husbands.
l
j ; A health expert advises tv public
to eat. bran, as It is a great health
food. Rut why turn to bran when
Newfoundland is frantically hogging
for new markets for its canned lob-
I ster?
I
j It is said the Russian troops got
command of an important mountain
j position by hanging to fhe tails of
their hardy ponies as the animals
scaled a strop summit . These feats
are certainly among the strangest
• talon of the war.
A cot lege profecror proves by history
th.at the best work of the world has
boon done by men of sixty year - or
ti' i>r. Well, a mr.r. ought to have most
of the foolishness out of his her..* by
the time ho reaches sixty
There has been a dec led falling eff
in the diamond trade owing to cir
cm.--lances beyond the control of the
diamond merchants. Rut t lie oread
and meat trade remains mere relive
than ever People having get i’’(o the
0; • : o’ .-afing are indir posed to give
It up if they can help it
Somebody says the women are going
to wear high silk hats. This will re¬
lieve mere man of a crushing respon¬
sibility that he never really enjoyed.
Unless one’s nervous system 13 bad¬
ly deranged, he will get just about as
much pleasure out cf the muttonheads
c; this world as he will from its wise¬
acres.
The generally accepted definition of
a ‘‘joy sleeper” is a fellow who
"pounds his pillow” at an hour of the
morning when nearly everybody else
is at work.
To keep the boy on the farm give
him an auto, says a student of the
problem 1! is quite conceivable that
it will have more of a pull with him
than a plow.
When a very eminent and respect¬
able magazine begins to advertise
“Nothing about the war,” one almost
suspects that other people are getting
tired of it, too.
One reason for calling womankind
the “fickle" sex may be found in the
changing waist line thereor A man's
waist line stays put in all but cireum-
ferential measurement.
----
It Is said that a motor car in Euro-
pean war service lasts only about ten
days. Then it is ready for the scrap
heap. Just think of that when you
are struggling with your upkeep!
The Liberty bell is to be heard from
coast to coast over the pew long dis-
tance instead of being sent on a junk-
eting trip. Those modern inventions
do cut out some of the old abuses
A dispatch states that China will
give $25,000 for the murder of an
American. Shq,„can get him murdered
much cheaper than that in this coun
try, if the old scale of thug prices is
still in force.
The congress of tailors which Oar,
™'S. are 0 verr r Ssh1} b Sy thTnk
the y 0U1 ,g nanitl Webste.rs and Henry
Clays cf the law schools of this eoun-
try ' are going to accept any dictation
of tha , kind
____
Battleship hats are declared for cer¬
tain reasons to be the latest style for
women. There was a time when there
seemed to be a foundation for the
submarine type, but at the present the
drea dnaught style seems to carrv the
mass of fashion.
Onc-eytd Pete, Harvard's educated
worm, succumbed to the strain. Hut
he is not the first who found culture
extremely trying.
The fact that a girl whose speech is
gone can siill sing will cast a dense
gloom over quite a few amateur
musical organizations.
A British fcrce, it is said, has cap¬
tured the Garden of Eden. If so i;
is not the first time the spot lias been
the scene of serious trouble.
It might not be a bad idea to make
it a rule that divorces shall be given
out only in pairs, to mothers and
daughters or fathers and sons.
Every modern invention, apparently,
has been turned to the uses of war ex¬
cept the mechanical piano and the
phonograph, and they often induce es¬
trangements.
The trouble about having an autemo-
bile horn with a soothing sound is that
it might put a pedestrian to sleep in¬
stead of waking him up.
A big cigar company reports earn¬
ings for IP 14 a million in excess of
those in 1913 Another proof that the
people have money to burn.
A physician blames the tango for
many human ailtnot ts. It was consid¬
erate of him to wait until the tango
had been superseded by newer dances.
--—_
The man y: ho tried to commit sui-
cide by swallowing insect powder is
i - r ’ • b!v one of those unfortunate in¬
dividuals who never does anything
right.
Statistics show that it has required
'0,000 worth of Zeppelins to kill no
persons, thus adding the high cost of
bembh’g to the rest of the world’s
burdens.
As the news from the front carries
no weighty information regarding
Sikhs, Gurkhas, pet dogs, and actress’
nurses, there must be some real fight-
ing in progress.
The department of agriculture con¬
cedes (hat English sparrows are suffi¬
,
cient destroyers of alfalfa weevil and
cutworms. Then why not give them a
chance for their lives?
Bibles for soldiers is the latest ; and
the good books are certain to be re-
ceived with acclaim if for no other
reaaon than that a Bible in the pocket
has often stopped a bullet.
Organizing fer peace and keeping a
loaded gun in your hip pocket may
seem a bit Paradoxical as a national
P°^- C T> ljut isn't any fool policy at
the Present stage of world civiliza-
tion '
--~—
Before San Francisco is called up
by Iong distance there Ehould be an
ur -derstanding that the person at the
°*- ber end is not to waste any time
telling about the glorious climate out
there. The minute rate is too high.
Eive stock in the United States is
* ncreas ’ ng in numbers, according to
tne I110E;t recent government reports:
1S privilege of every one to
say it is high time. A million more
beef cattle than a year ago is one en-
couraging item.
Whether the hair of the dog is a
reirmdv for his bite or not should de¬
pend on actual practice So far as we
can see the same rule will apply to
the project to cure hay fever by an
injection of the extract of the pollen of
the plant asserted to cause the dis¬
ease
Prisoners of war in Germany are to
be put to work on the farms, receiving
two and a half cents a day. As the
farmers for whom they work must
lodge and feed them, their wages will
keep them in stamps, unless they pre¬
fer to save up the money to live on
when the war is over.
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• This is to announce that ii
j c d C. nolbruok, a vil
Carneivfiic, ua. o’
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will supply all motor I
now
car owners of this com¬ n
munity with
r'i
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P Tubes and wes 0 Accessories u H
v: yi tv An growing demand for i-
ever
IWS Firestones in this locality and
every locality where quality is i
' appreciated has made it necessary
WMk • to establish headquarters here. Ill G.
%lsr The Exclusive Firestone Tire factory—the Factory in Larg¬ the * | •I H ij
1tei est P' 6
World—has again increased 78%. greatly n
and the output has jumped a
m This enormous output, made under ill; N
pis perfect possible factory to sell Firestones conditions, at makes a price it m m Btf; i
no greater than others are forced .
to charge for tires made in less 1
EG economical factories. ■1 .1
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Cali ai Firestone Headquarters I M 1
Above for Biggest Tire Value u M
1
FLeetone Tire & Rubber Company 1
Akron, Ohio—Branches and Dealers Everywbera
"America's Largest Exclusive Tire a::d Rim Makers 9 *
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Designed end :V
Patented -t
1867 '■ ,i --
Tv/enSj7'3evc.2i Years A cp 11
the first Cortrcht Metal Shingles were put on, E
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$!psi / rt.: pj
W VS They’re still on—still in good condition, and
the only attention they’ve had is an occasional M
The coat of paint. j I
Standard sKgaxa Fireproof, In addition Stormproof to the lasting qualities, they’re !
and inexpensive. H
EvcrZir.co s’?-' l For Sale by J