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VOL. I.
r Chatter* Chatter* nml No Matter,
beep within the wooden border
Of a vale I strayed, one day,
brawn on by the sweetest music
Wafted through its shady way;
“Chatter, chatter,
And no matter,"
Was the song it seemed to say.
As I wandered, grew the music
Yet more clear and sweet to me,
Till I found a bubbling brooklet
Gliding onward tathe sea;
. , “Chatter, chatter,
And no matter,"
Gliding onward, fresh and free.
In a pool its waters tarried,
Silent, by a mossy bank,
Where the wecpfng willows drooping,
Singing rose and dipping sank;
“Chatter, chatter,
And no matter,"
Breeze-kissed branches rose and sank.
Standing on its brim I pondered,
breaming on its perfect glass,
Till I seemed to see beside me,
Gazing down, a joyous lass;
- “Chatter, chatter,
And no matter," . j
With the pool her looking glass.
Then the years seemed swiftly fleeting,
Once again, but aged, stood
The woman now, a-looking backward;
Thinking of her maidenhood;
“Chatter, chatter.
And no matter,”
in her long passed maidenhood.
l-'ar out from the wooded valley.
Then 1 journeyed to-the sea.
Where 1 heard the tides a-beating
Crooning how a song to me;
“Beating, Beating,
Time a-fleeting,
From the brooklet to the sea.
— IV. M. Hazeltine, in Yankee Blade.
An Extraordinary Discovery
“When I was a youngster and asked
my father for money he used to tell me
ihat money,didu’t grow on bushes, and
until the summer of 18S1 I believed
him,” said a well-known resident of
Belleville, whose pretty cottage over¬
looks the placid Passaic. “I changed
my mind in that year, however, upon
discovering, to my extreme satisfaction,
■hat at least. on one occasion money
eould bo picked from bmhos with as
much ease as I could pick ripe rasp¬
berries. It was on the Fourth of July,
md on that day the woodcock season
opened. I was out early with my setter
Belle, and wo crossed the river to pick
up some birds that I had located in the
tittle strip of alders a short- distance
ibove the Jersey City water works. It
was a dry season, and the birds were
thick along the river, liav.ng b;ea
driven there by lack of moisture along
the mountain brooks and in the wools.
“I had killed four b.rds, when Bolls
came toward me v. ith a $10 bill in ber
month. You may imagine my surprise.
Tlook the lid from the intelligent
brute, i x imined it, and found it moist
with dew but perfectly good and
whole.
“ -You know a good thing when you
see it, Bello,’ I said, •Go and see if
here is any mote like it there,’ and she
started , ff at a bri-k trot. I watched
ber and saw her spring up and
something from a bush in the thicket.
A moment later she was at my feet with
a $20 note in her lmutb, holding it as
tenderly as she would a bird. I was
utterly astonished, and plunged wildly
nto tho th eket, regardless of the cat
briers and other thorm which el ung to
me like the hands of a drowning man.
I had not gone 25 feet before I saw a
$10 bill .mpaled on a thorn of a wild
app e tree and just ahead was another
3 prout decorated like a Christmas tree,
with bills on every thorn.
“I went right to work gathering in
the-fruit. Tneve were tens, twenties,
and hundreds twisted around the
‘wigs, stuck'on thorns, cr crowded in¬
to the crotches of limbs. Several bills
were scattered over the ground near by,
and whilo I was gathering them Bello
brought in a ten and a twen y from
some distance ahead, I heard a gun-
shot some distance behind me, and it
spurred me on to extraordinary indu -
try while the money market was easy.
;I plunged ahead, picking bills from
the bushes as I went along and shoving
them into the pocket of my shooting
coat. I came across two more little
trees trimmed with greenbacks, and
then located a regular savings bauk
lost in the woods. It was a big black
locust, with a trunk ten inches in di¬
ameter, completely covered with bunch-
BS of cruel thorns down to within a
foot ol 1. e ground. Tito thorns wero
plastered all ov;r with bills, many of
which wexe stained with blood from
the fingers of the person who placed
them there. I believe I p eked up
$1810 from this tree, and not a bill
was less than a five.
“Down near the foot of the tree was
a fluttering strip of blue silk, evidently
the hem of a woman’s dress. Up to
this moment I had been too busy to
think, but this rag set me to wonder-
ing. How on ear. h could a woman get
into that thicket-,-1 thought, and get-
ting down on my knees I found the
prints of narrow, sharp.heeled shoos in
the moss-covered u£tf. . ILwag^s wosisr.
5m and after tevuriaa .tfcft iAil
THE ENTERPRISE f
sight I followed the trail, picking from
the bushes on cither sido of the way an
occasional bill. A hundred'yards from
the locust tree, the track led to tho
edge of the river between two water
willows, aud in tho soft mud for several
feet from the shoro I could seo foot
prints leading out towards the channel.
I went back through the willows and
as ured myself thet tho tracks wero not
doubled, and then 1 w-alkod up. and
down the river’s eigo for a quarter of. a
mile hunting for further traces of tho
femiuine boots. There were none,and,
concluding that the wearer must have
committed suicide, I returned to the
willows and began a search there, I
walked out in tho tracks as far as my
hip boots would permit me to go, and
much further than 1 couli seo bottom
in tho dirty water. Then I was satisfied
that whoever she was she lull drowned
herself after disposing of her wealth.
I returned to tho locust thou, aud, tak¬
ing up tho strip of silk rolled it up
curefutly, and put it in my vest pocket
‘■1 was in no mind for shooting, aud
was about to start for home when 1
thought of Belle, and whistled for her.
She did not come, nml I moved on
through tho thicket. As I passed an
opeuing I caught sight of her stiiuchly
pointing, mid walking up Hushed and
missed a wooilccck. Tho bird circled
cut over the river and pluugeri back to
the thicket somewhere in the neighbor¬
hood of the willows. I was vexed at
missing the bird, and determined to
get it if there was a chance. So, send¬
ing Belle ahead, I pudied on toward
tho willows, and was soon gratified to
see B-Le point again. This time 1
killed the bird and sent Belle after it.
She letrieved the deal bird beautifully,
and, dropping it at my feet, made
another dash into the brush, aud a mo¬
ment later cam; back with an alligator-
skin hand-bag, which she hold in her
mouth until I took it. I opened it and
found it one-quarter full of money in
bills of a large denomination. Bendcs
tho money there was a small morocco
case containing a hypodermic syringe, a
small bottle labelled morphine and con¬
taining a few grains of tho drug, a
pair of kid gloves, a button hook, aud
a dream book. That was *a’i. Not a
scrap of writing or anything to betra;
the identity of tho owner of the hag
and money. In returning toward the
road I plucked a piece of a gray os¬
trich tip from the branches of a tree
and found a ladies’ watch neatly bed led
in a boll of moss with tho chain carc-
fully coiled around it. 1 kept my eyes
open then and looked at every inch of
the way, following the footstep! care-
fully and coming out on tho road with-
out finding anything more.
“I went straight horns, carrying the
bag in my hand, and when I got in my
bedroom I locked the door an I began
to empty my pockets on the bed. When
the last bill was in sight I arranged tho
bills according to their denomination,
and began counting. There were tim¬
tccn one . hundre d.dollar notes, one five
huadreJi gcven ty-four fifties, eighty
twoatk% fifty.three tens, and nineteen
^ or $7725 m
‘'Nowldon’t believe anybody will
be surprised when I say that I kept that
money. I commenced spending it the
afternoon of the day I got it. I put
$100 in ray pocket and went to New¬
ark, and as a natural consequence got
on a Fourth of July spree and did not
show up at home until my -money was
gone and I had borrowed 10 cents from
a friend. That was on the morning of
the 7th, and I felt like a fool. I made
up my mind then to take care of every
remaining dollar. It win the “basis of
what Ihavo got now, and I think I
have doubled it twice since. I have
told this story to two or three persons
aud I am not afraid to tell it to the
world, provided my name is not used
and I don’t get a horde of beggars after
mc. establish
“If anybody can owner¬
ship of the money I stand ready to pay
it over. My theory is that some drug-
crazed creature from New York got oil
the train at Arlington and wandered up
the river to the woodcock thicket anl
tlieu took another dose of morphine.
Then I think she wandered through the
brush in a state of exhilaration, and
finally brought up in tho river, She
left me a fine legacy, and it is all owing
to old Belle there that I stumbled on
it. She shall have the best of every-
thing as long as she draws breath.
The only thing that ever worried me
about the money was a superstitious
fear that it would bring mo no luck. -
haven’t had an unlock!/ day siucp I
Ruad it, and it, enabled mo.. to leave
the bench and go into business for iny-
se If, besides buying a mortgage on the
house I am living in, which I after-
ward bought outright. Buying the
mortgage looks Lkp going at it the
wrong wav, but I can assure you that I
, , ,
Sun. T ****
The tobacco business! ia Italy is run
CARNESVILLR GA.. MONDAY, APRIL -'8.1890.
Higher than Railroad Orders.
‘•No, w c dou'-t bounce the tramps
who rido on the bumpers-of our freight
train,” said a freight ■•conductor who
has a run to the West. “I preeumc
that we carry an average of a dizon
each trip, but if they remain between
the cars we pretend not to seo them."
“But it is against orders," was
urged.
“Oh, yes, but (here is a higher pow¬
er than gen eral orders, even for rail¬
road men. Five or six years ago I used
to he hard on the railroad tramp, III
have the train looked over at every
stop, and if we caught a chap he got
handled pretty lively. Nowadays I
ilirow out a hint to tho brakemen to
shut both eyes, and, if the tramp don’t
presume too much on my good nature,
no one will disturb him."
“What happened to change your
mind!' ’
“Oh, a little incident of no interest
to the public, but a great (leal to me.
I was married in December, three years
ago. On the third night I got an order
to run out with an extra. There was a
cold rain, which froze as it felt, and
olio of my crew got hurt at. our very
first stop. This left us short-handed,
and as we could not supply his place I
had to act for him. We wcic back in
the mountains, running strong to make
time, when the engineer whistled
brakes for a grade. I climbed <ut
of the caboose with tho bruke-
men, end had sot twe
brakes and was after tho third, when a
;urch of the cars threw me down, and I
fell between two of them. I had just
one glimpse of the red-cheeked bride
at home, just one swift thought of her
in widow’s weeds and her heart break-
ng, when a hand grabbed me. 1 was
going down head first, but the strong
clueth turned me over and my feet
struck the bumpers. I’d have gone
then, only some, one put my hands oo
thq. ladder,, flung liis arras around me
from behind to hold mo there and
said:
“‘You are all right, old man.
Your nerve will come back pretty
soon. > 1)
“And it was a tramp, eh!"
“It was, and he held me there until
the train reached its stop, and then
helped me down, for the sudden fright
lufd taken all ray streughth and nerve
away. But for him I should have been
ground up under the wheels, This is
the reason I keep a soft spot in my
heart for tho genus tramp, and why
when I sometimes walk the length of
every train and find every bumper occu-
pied, Hook skyward and pretend not
to sec as much as an old fur cap.
A Busy Preacher. *
If there be any busier man in New
York than Rev. Morgan Dix of Trinity
Corporation he would, says a corre¬
spondent of the Richmond (Va.) Ttis-
patch, do well to step up and be identi¬
fied. Besides attending to the vast
routine business of the Trinity Corpora¬
tion, with its $20,000,COO invested,
preaching regularly, marrying 1 people,
visiting the sick and officiating over the
dead, he is called upon by men and
women of every walk in life for advice
on all sorts of questions. No matter
iio w early you go to his office in tho
morning you will find adozen or twenty
people ahead of you. They all want to
tee the distinguished rector of old
Trinity in person and explain to
him their various schemes and trou¬
bles. The writer of this waited two
hours in his office the other day for an
opportunity to get a word with liim on
a matter of private business. In per¬
sonal appearance, Dr. Dix is one of the
most srriking.men in New York, and
always attracts a great deal of attention.
He is a strong preacher, a deep thinker,
and his voice has lost none of the charm
that made him famous as a preacher.
While not exactly the fashionable
preacher, he is called upon by society
to officiate at weddings that arc un¬
usually profitable. His personal in¬
come is cnofiflaous, and he has a com¬
j fortable fortune. He gives away a
great deal of money, aud has helped
more young men to get on in fho world
than any preacher of the day.
Salt and Fresh Water.
When fresh water is introduced into
a salt-water aquarium it wifi remain on
the surface, unless the milled, whole is thor-
oughly stirred of Tho fresh
vyater 0 f i-jrers is not thoroughly
mixed with flier salt water of bays,
p u t_ fl 0 w 3 off on the surface, and only
at considerable distance or after long
time is the salt water predomin^it.
Hence it is quite credible that tho
salt water of the South Atlantic ofl
the mouth of the great Amazon Rioter
is fresh and fit for drinking above a
buchdrel leagues from land.
The Burglar’s Mistake.
“You are here for safe burglary, I
believe," remarked the prison visitor to
an inmate.
“Naw," replied the latter, “I
thought it was safe, but it Wasa’t.”
THE NAJA-KALLU.
A Curious Stone Used by Cobras
to Attract Fire-Flies.
The Green Light Which It Emits
Acts as a Decoy.
The cobras are perhaps the only ser¬
pents which will cat insects. They
feed on ants, grasshoppors, a variety of
beetles, etc., but seem to havp a special
preference for fire-flies, porhap? becauso
tho latter caii bo caught at night much
more easily than any other kind of in¬
sect. I have often for hours watched
cobras in the grass catching tho fire¬
flies, darting about hero and there, a
proce s which requires considerable ex¬
ertion on the part of the serpent. Now,
every eutomologist knows that tho fly¬
ing lumpyridm consist entirely of males.
Tho females, which are not very numer¬
ous, me much largor aud cannot fly, as
they have only rudimentary wings.
They sit quietly in the grass, omitting
a greenish light, which is much strong¬
er than that of tho mn’es, and fades
and becomes brilliant nt regular inter¬
vals, If a glow-worm be watched for
a time, a steady current of malo insects
will bo observed flying toward it, aud
alighting in close proximity.
Now it so happens that tho uaja- kal-
lu, a little pebble of chloropliano or
fluor-spar, emits in tho dark a greenish
light, which is so much like that o f tho
female lampyris that is an easy matter
to deceive the male fire-fly with it, by
setting it up as a decoy. The cobras
have gradually como to take advantage
of an experience made by them, acci¬
dentally, I dare say, thousands of years
ago. It may frequently happen, for in¬
stance, that a cobra finds one of theso
shining stones in tho .gravel of tho dry
river-beds (where they are by no means
uncommon), being attracted to it by its
glow at night, and taking it fer a glow¬
worm. It would then, at any rate,
notice that tho fire-flies cou d be caught
much more easily and quickly in the
neighborhood of that shining ob¬
ject than anywhere else and
would habitually return to
it. Several cobras might thus como
together, and there would bo comp;ti-
tioD, and from this moment to tho find¬
ing out that success in capturing fire¬
flies depends on the possession of this
phosphorescent pebblo, and to the seiz¬
ing of it in order to prevent another
snake from monopolizing it, is, in my
opinion, no great step, and involves no
exceptional powers of reasoning. The
cobra carries, it about, and soon learns
to treasure it, for it affords it in caiy
means of getting its living. All it has
to do is to deposit the stone in the
grass at night, and the obliging insects
literally fly down its throat.
There arc even reasons for believing
tliat , individual . experience is
no 1 now i
necessary J to cause any J cobra to act m
this m inner, but that even a young
,cobra, on finding such a stone, will in- j
stiucFivoly take it up, aud use it in the
manner I have described, For it must j
be borne in mind that there is an in¬ |
herited race memory nmon g the 1 ower I
animals which is often far stronger than
the memory gathered during the short
lifetime of the indivilual. What
causes a blind kitten to spit and put up
its bscle if a dog is brought near it? It
never saw a dog, never saw anything,
yet it knows there is some danger
ahead. Thus the accumulated experi¬
ence of tho cobra’s ancestors during
countless generations now causes it to
act in a manner which wo refer to in¬
stinct.
Sueh are the remarkable facts con¬
nected with tho uaja-kallu, tlie cobra’s
shining stone. Who can tell whotber
the old traditions of snakes earying
precious stones, of which we still find
traces in our fairy tales, may not have
their source in some such fact as this?—
Harper't Magazine.
The Owl Crazp.
Tho owl ernzo has struck Washington
with full force, One correspondent!
there writes about it: Owls here, owls j
there, owls everywhere! Vcril; ope ,
would think that owls had saved the |
American capital as the did Rome, '
geese
Five small, but monstroui, imitation I
owls, made of real feathers, but not
owl feathers, with gilt halos around
their staring eyes, swing upon a perch
in the drawing-room of my boarding!
housdT In tho room of a friend the !
splasher for the wnshstand is embroid¬
ered with owls. In the shop-windows j
on tho streets I see owls of all imagina- j
ble varieties, from the genuino biid, !
stuffed in life-like hideousnass, to a) !
pair of plush owls in a jeweller’s win- j
dow with diamond eyes and amber beak
set in gold* and with golden or gilt j
claws, I caunot tell which. Ornament- j
ing the window of a private residence I
saw a transparent-owl, and at a house j
where I called tlm inevitable owl sat j
perched on. a candles.ick on the mantle- j
piece, J
A New Kind of Care.
A traveller recently returnod from
Faking says that ho saw there a peculiar
method of euro. In a ternplo outside
ono of tho city gatos is to bo found a
brass mule of life size,supposed to have
wonderful healing properties. Patients
suffering from every imaginable disease
sefck this tomplo to obtain a euro. The
method pursued is as follows: Hup-
posing you suffer from sciatica, you go
with all speed to this famous tomplo,
and having discovered tho particular
part of tit® brass mule corresponding to
(ho painful rogiou of your own body,
y ou must rub tho animal a certain num¬
ber of times aud then with the same
baud shampoo your own disablol mem¬
ber, aud then—-well, thou the pain
goes.
The special feature of this method of
cure is its delightful simplicity. Is
your tooth aching! Just scrub tho
mule’s teeth aud afterward your own,
and the cure is complete. Have you an
ulcer of the cornea? Bass tho tips of
your fingers to aud fro over the particu¬
lar eyeball of the mule, and then with
well regulated pressure rub repeatedly
the nffUctod eye.
Tho mule has unhappily lost hissight
during tho many yoars ho lias bocu en¬
gaged in his beneyolont work, tho eye¬
balls, wo are told, having boon gradu¬
ally wern away, as the result of con¬
stant friction, until now you have only
tho empty orbits to oporato upon.
Tho animal is patched in all direc¬
tions with fresh pieces of brass put on
to cover holes produced by the. constant
friction of eager patients, and a now,
perfectly whole mule stafids ready at
baud, awaiting the day when his old
colleague, having falion to pieces in the
temple, shall give him an opportunity
of likewise benefiting prosperity.—
North China Medical Jour mil.
Bow Booth Rebuked Two Girls.
During his stay at Baltimore, recent¬
ly, Booth was beset by young girls who
were desirous of meeting 1 the actor.
This is not the first time ho has been
thus importuned, and ho awaited an
opportunity to deliver a wholesomo
lecture. The other day, while seated
in his room, a card was brought to him
bearing (ho names of two misses. He
told the waiter he would moot them in
,the parlor. With stately step and
wearing his gravest look, the tragedian
descended the stairs and entered the
presence of his visitors. In freezing
tonos ho bade them good day, and asked
of them their business. “Oh,” said
the younger of tho two, who was
not more than 17, “we saw you play
last night, and came to form your ac¬
quaintance." Here was the great trage¬
dian’s opportunity. Drawing his slight
form to its fullest length, ho delivered
his lecture, and it is pretty cortaiii the
girls will not soon forget his words.
After reminding them of tfheir indescro-
tion and the dbngfer attending the pur-
suit ... of nctors, . , be said, ., looking , nt ... tho
cards, . , that . ho , _ knew , the names wero as-
sumfld> ..if I knew your right names,"
ho 6aid( , a should ccrta raly inform
y0U( . parellts .“ Tho girls wer0 conl .
pletely taken aback, and, muttering an
apology, they hastened out of the
hotel.
An Indian's Fight with a Boa.
One day an Indian made an excursion
to a mountain near Chevantzieurm,
Mexico, to look after s >me fuel for hii
hut. While cutting up a dry oak lie
suddenly felt a bite on his leg, given in
the fraction of a second. A moment
Inter ho felt coiling around his liody
tho terrible fold of a boa constrictor.
Instinctively he leaned his head over
toward tho wounded leg arid was ul-
m .st fascinated by the glare of two
bright basilisk eyes, that gleamed like
fiery coals in the head of the serpent.
Quicker than a flash tho 'Indian
ducked his head and caught tho neck
of the reptile between his jaws, sinking
his teeth in tho quivering flesh and
clinging to it with tho desperation of
tho dying. Tho huge scr.cnt lashed
his tail and tried to twist its head in
order to bury its fangs in the Indian,
but tho latter clung on and began io
chew away at thq neck of tho boa,
j* the thinnest and most delicate
part of the snake’s anatomy. After
chewing for "' long time, the Indian
a.
succeeded in beheading his antagonist,
the folds dropped from around his
and the Indian was free.—Ncu>
Mexico News.
The Bird Ou the Silver Dollar.
“As to the buzzard on the dollar
piece," said Director Leech, “I would
certainly like to see that changed for a
more heroic bird, with his head higher
in the air. Wo have, at tho mint in
Philadelphia, the stuffed figure of an
eagle that used to fly around the build-
ing, which would serve as a good
model. Do you know we had to take
a feather out of ibe tail of the bird on
the dollar? After we had struck off a
couple of million pieces we found there
wore eight feathers in his tail, when
there should have been but seven."
SCIENTIFIC SCRAPS.
Dr. Ilauau of Zurich has successfully
propagatod cancer in rats by inocula
tiou.
Soft oolitic stone is now made inti
hard marble by treating it with a chem¬
ical solution.
The French government lias recently
forbidden all military physicians tc
make auy uie whatever of hypuotism.
A Moscow foundry fuses metals by
electricity. Tho glare is greater thor
tho sun, and employes work two hours
per day.
The maximum power gonoratod by all
electric uiotor is usually considered
seventy-five horse power, but experi¬
ments indicate that ono hundred horse
power will bo reached.
Aluminium form d tho subject of
soveral interesting addresses before the
rcoont convention of mining engineers,
and cooking utensils iipido of the new
metal were among the curiosities dis¬
played.
Engineers use kerosene to removo the
fca'es which form on the inside of boil¬
ers. The oil is poured into an empty
boiler aud tho water then turned on.
Tho oil, floating ou the water, comes in
contact with the scales before the water
docs.
Dr. Roger Williams, of Bt. Bartholo¬
mew's Hospital, London, has found
that out of 12, 808 cases in which chlo¬
roform had thoro been mod during the
past ten years, ten had resulted fatallyi
whilo thoro ha 1 bocu only throe deaths
out of 12, 58f cases in which ether hud
been used.
Tho serv'ea bullet for tho now Eng¬
lish magazine rifle is, it is sail, to be a
compound soldered bullet, ono advan¬
tage of which is diminished friction,
and consequent less heating of tho bar¬
rel, experiments showing this to lie ton
degrees le3s after twelve rounds had
been fired.
A new idea for preventing the spread¬
ing of burning oil on the surfaco of the
water in harbors consists of u floating
dam built up of galvanize! iron boxes.
By means' of this device a section of n
harbor may be cut off from tho rest, and
burning material confined where it will
do least damage.
A sculptor in Paris, named Frederick
Beer, has discovered a procuss for mak¬
ing marble fluid and molding it ns a
metal is molded. The new product,
called beryf, costs but little moro than
piaster, and is especially well adapted
to tho ornamentation of bourns aud the
construction of floors baths, etc.
Some extremely curious and interest¬
ing oh.crvations on the temperature of
the exposed surface of the human body,
as the hands and face, lately carried on
in Belgium, have been found to givo
a direct utility to observations of solar
radiation, and show that our bodies are
quite sensitive meteorological indi¬
cators.
Tho e’ectrieil prodess 1ms been suc¬
cessfully adopted in South Australia
for the recovery of the minute gold-
dust that lias hitherto been lost in the
work of soparnting tho metal from fho
ore. The economical value of tho pro¬
cess has been abundantly proved, and
the returns are suftiiiently good to com¬
pensate for tho somewhat high expense
of the process.
The experiment has been made of en¬
deavoring to increase the efficiency of
the heating surfuc; iu stoam boilers by
pine ng within the tub33 a number-
eight or more—of libs, running nearly
from encl to end. These rib* project
iuto the space through which tho gas
flows, thus offering a large surface for
tho absorption of heat, while they also
penetrate into tho hot centre of the
gaseous column. Tests show an aver¬
age gain in evaporation of 20 per cent,
iu favor of these ribbed tubes.
Why the Lesson Stopped.
The ton of a well-known Cambridge
family was being given some doctrinal
instruction with somewhat unsatisfac*
tory results, ono evening, when his
Irish nurse appeared lo put him to bed.
Here was an opening; “Tom,” said
his grandfather, “who takes care of
you at night?” Tom looked amazed at
the stupidity of the question. “Why,
Bridget McCarthy, of cour30, grand¬
pa!" Still undismayed, the old gentle¬
man persisted: “Who takes care of
Bridget McCarthy, Thomas?" This
was too much for the young man, who
looked first at his instructor and then
at the stalwart proportions of the Irish
woman. “I should think,” said he,
“that Bridget McCarthy was big
enough to take care of herself, if she's
over going to be!” There was no more
doctrinal instruction that evening.—
Wide Awake
Not Necesiary,
Father—I dou’t believe you’ve an
ounce of brains in your head.
bon—They are entirely unnecessary,
fathah. I go only in fashionable socei*
NO. 17.
Off for Slnmberland.
Purple waves of evening play
Fpon the western shore* of day.
While babies sail, so safe and free,
Over the mystic Slumber Sea.
Their little boats are cradles light;
The sails are curtains pure and white,
The rudders are sweet lullabies;
The unchors, soft and sleepy sighs.
They're outward bound for JSlumberland
Where shining dreams lie on the sand,
Like whisp’ring shells that murmur low
The pretty fancies babies know.
And there, among the dream-Bliells bright
The little ones will play all night,
1’ntiJ the sleepy tide turns;—then
They'll all come sailing home agaiu.
—Caroline Kvans, in lit. Nicholas.
HUMOROUS.
A bank cashior is liko a revolver.
He’s all right as long as he doesn’t go
off.
Womon do not marry for money, but
they say it is oasier to love a rich man
than a poor one.
It makes all the difference in thi
world whether it is tho hand that it
shaken or tho fist. .
The rejected lover who had deter¬
mined to hang himself finally com¬
promised by hanging his head.
“Do you keep auy secrets from youi
husband?" “Only one.” “What is
it.” “Tho fact that I rule him.”
There is hope in the future for everj
man. Even for the youth with a pair
of tight shoes on there is tho blissful
prospect of beltimo.
“Bo not over-zealous iu urging your
friend to disclose a secret,” says a phil¬
osopher, and ho iE right. Let her alone
and she’ll let it out herself before long.
Lawyer (drawing will)—Your ostate
is much smaller, sir than is geaorallf
supposed. Sick Mau—Yei, but keep
that quiet until after the funeral. 1
want a good show of grief-stricken
mourners.
Lockycr, tho astronomer, ‘attribute,
warm Winter to a decrcnse of solai
cuorgy aud not sufficient licatiug (h«
equatorial regions to attract polar cur¬
rents. That must be it. The weathrq
has loafed along for three months with¬
out energy enough to catch cold.
A Monster Tree.
A correspondent from Minnesoli
writes that a tamarack treo (larlx Amer¬
icana) hns lately been found which
measured seven feet eight iuches ia cir
cumfereneo four feet above tho ground,
and was estimated to bo 125 feet high,
tho largest cedar (thuja cccidentails)
observed by the samo correspondent,
measured ten feet four inches iu cir¬
cumference at four feet above th<
ground, and was about seventy fee'
high. Belli these trees grow near t
brook of constant spring water, aud in
alluvial soil, rather stony.
A monster elm tree stands on tin
Avery Durfee farm in Wayne County,
N. Y. Two feet above the ground ii
measures thirty-three feet ten inches ir
circumference, and five feet above th«
ground twenty feet and ten inches. li
is sixty feet to the first bmb and th«
total amount of lumber in the body
of tho tree is 16,250 feet.
E ghty years ugo when the farm win
cleared, this tree was left as a land-
mark. It was then a giant among the
surrounding forest trees.
A correspondent in Gleuelleu, Tenn.,
sends us the following memorandum
with regard to a largo tulip treo recent¬
ly cut down ncartliat place. The small¬
est diameter across tho stump, three
feet from the ground, was seventy-eight
inches inside tho hark, which showetl
004 layers of annual growth, with only
thirty-eight layers of sap wood occupy¬
ing a width of an inch and a half. The
diameter increased three iuches iu the
thirty years, beginning with tho 536th
year of the tree's age, aud six inches in
twcuty-five years, beginning at a period
when tho treo was eighteen inches in
diameter.
The Time He Remembered.
There is a certain greatly honored
author in our midst whoso absence o!
mind is notorious. Not long ago this
gentleman had occasion to make a lec¬
turing v.sit to Portland, aud stay ed while
in that city at the house of a friend.
After he had returned he took a sort of
inventory of his things, and, tobisown
surprise, raised nothing. Having oc¬
casion to write, on his arrival home, to
the friend at Portland, ho added this
postscript:
“For once in my life, I believe 1
came away, when I left your house,
without leaving anything whatsoever
behind. The experience is so unusual
that it seems to mo well worthy of re.
mark t"
The same afternoon, returning from
a trip down (own, he found at hi*
house a letter from Portland which had
crossed his own, and also an express
package; and the letter read:
“16end this morning by express your
umbrella, ruhbers and tcothbm h, which
you left at oar house when you wen*
away. Transcribe