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VOL. E-NO. 44. kOFI-iTy, Proprietor. rates - CAn $2 00 M py°nc .. X 00 ,rxV ftlX in° nt * lS ~tr C ° P I .hrce months 76 Co, ’- T f n ;,biDff five subscribers, with ny ° n v will’recei ve a copy free. m on i?' . ui.hine their papers changed abscribor ■ o^ce to ano ther, must state 1 oDe If ihe post office from which they -r^ ]ge d. l as well as that to which wfc , h 7ntions must he paid in advance. !' 6 ''{per will he stopped at the end of the ! raid for, unless subscriptions are pre g numbers complete the yeiir, ca sh advertising rates ' — r mOB | 12 mgs '-“‘■fYn " 10 J^v inches.-I ’’ - 1 ir, 00 22 00 i*" 6W 1100 18 00 27 00 infhei '' e6O 14 00 -25 00 3500 jolnnin.. “ 05 00 40 00 60 00 i! u,nn -- 00 no 41 00 62 00 100 00 and deaths not exceeding six r f mentsto in advance, Sto schedule rates, unless otherwise n C fnns°sending advertisements, will state length of time they wish them published Vths snace they want them to occupy. Parties advertising by contract will be re 'ictU to tlieir legitimate business. T.r.O AI. ADVERTISEMENTS. ,Kill's sales, per inch, four weeks. .$3 50 I mortgage fi fa sales, per inch, & taUon'for^'letters of administration, euanlianship, etc., thirty days ...... 3 00 otice to debtois and creditors of an •state, fortv days •• ■ • •-•••••; -plication for leave to sell land, four les'of 1 ian<i. etc., per inch, forty days 5 00 '• “ perishable property, per inch, te’i (lays • ‘ V ~ nplication for letters of dismission from Guardianship, forty days. ... ... ■■■■■•’ 1 nplicatiorrfor letters of dismission from administration, three months.. ( oO it-iHfehing lost papers, the lull space __ of three months, per inch ‘ uu omnellinff titles from executors or ad ministrators where bond has been given by the deceased, the full space of three months, per inch ‘ stray notices, thirty days 3 w ule for foreclosure of mortgage, four months, monthly, per inch. *> ale of insolvent papers, thirty days. . . o t U [omP'tead, two weeks -* * ’ B-u.si33.esi3 Ogt-x 1 cS.s W. T. POOL, D. S., Iroad Street, COLUMBUS, GA., W/K i-isit Hamilton and vicinity oncerlfe lt : c ]j un;m me smnracr. t ->,.. (attended to Plate work and tilling done n the best and latest styles. Satisfaction gnamntced, or no charge. mayß-0m , * mi/WKI.L C R BUSSELL RUSSELL ct XUS SELL, ATTORNEYS AT LAW, COLUMBUS, GEORGIA Will practice in all the State Courts. Dr- T- I_i- Jenl^ins, Ir.:.:: TIST, HAMILTON, GA. TIIOS. S. MITCHELL,- M. D., Resident Physician and Surgeon, e, HAMILTON, GEORGIA Special attention given to Operative Sur gtry and treatment of Chronic Diseases. Terms Cash. WLDEuTtIGLUTIHIIFT, ~ DENTIST, COLUMBUS, - - - GEORGIA Oilice over Chapman’s drug store, Ban “°ipb st ; near city terminus of N. & S. R. R. Kespecfnl! 7 offers his services to the peo- Pb of Harris county. ju2oly CEA TTAIIO O CHEE HOUSE, By J. T. HIGGINBOTHEM. t EST point, ga HENRY C. CAMERON, Attorney at Law, HAMILTON, GA Hr7~J. W. CAMERON, HAMILTON, GA. Special attention to Midwifery. Charges Moderate. Hinoa Uozier, ATTORNEY-AT-LAW Hamilton, Georgia nr Wi 'l practice in the Chattahoochee Circuit, an .vwhere else. All kinds of collections ft seen—either way. It ANKINHOUSE COLUMBUS, GA. J. W. RYAN, Prop’r. RUBY restaurant, Rar and Billiard Saloon, UNDER the RANKIN HOUSE. DUO j. iv. RYAN, Prop'h. Hamilton iKI Visitor. ‘DOMESTIC’ FASHIONS. All of the latest styles in dress furnished in patterns cut to any measure—price from t. nto thirty cents each. Send for Catalogue, which is free to all. ‘DOMESTIC’ SEWING MACHINE The most perfect and reliable machine in the world, and capable of doing work that no other machine can. Send for prices and directions how to choose. ‘DOMESTIC’ MAGAZINE. f A leautiful Family Journal, published montilv at SI 50 a year—intended to make homebappy. Send for specimen number— price 16 cents. Address DOMESTIC S. M. CO., jul' 6m 27 Marietta st, Atlanta, Ga. TIFF. T- MOORE, At Van Riper’s old Stand, COLUMBUS, GEORGIA Offers his services as a 1 to all wanting Pictures from card to life size. Old Pictures can be copied, enlarged anc' colored in a satisfactory manner, in oil or water. ' Lor.g experience and unsurpassed facilities enable me to offer as good inducements as any Gallery in the State. All work guaran teed to suit customers, or no charge, at rates -asJoi.litSACn .r_.lv leri 1 ™— J, & l KAUFMAN, WHOLESALE DEALERS IN GROCERIES, Provisions, Liquor, Tobacco, BAGGING AND TIES, And all articles in the Grocery Line and its branches. We sell as low as any other House in this city. Nos. 14 and 1G Broad St., COLUMBUS, GA. Mr. JOHN W. HODO, of Harris county, is with us, and will be pleased to sec his frijnds and acquaintances, and take pleasure in serv ing them. J. & J- KAUFMAJ. £B922s2<£-I!IASy9& MAGIC ERASIVE SOAP, > For removing Pitch, Paint, 'Hfr, Grease and Rosin from Clothe 4 and Carpets. • Tills soap will also cure nearly all diseases of the skin that flesh is heir to. It will mre a turn or sc-ild fjuifkcr Ilian finy cpici known remedy. Use it for tetter, rlngwrtm, salt rheum, fever sores, ulcers, rough shin, tan and freckles, pimples or blotches on ‘.he face, erysipelas or neuralgia : also for shaving and shampooing. It is undoubtedly the finest article for keeping the skin white and soft that has ever been manufactured. I also manufacture a superior article of Laundry Soap, which I sell at the unprece dented low price of four and a half cents per pound—warranted to give satisfaction. Address M. McKEIGHAN. sole proprietor and manufacturer, Atlanta, Ga. oct3o-8m J. H. BRAMHALL, WATCHMAKER, JEWELER, and Singer Sewing Machine Ag’t 99 Broad St., Columbus, Ga. HAMILTON, HARRIS CO., GA„ FRIDAY, NOV. 13, 1874. A FORTUNE FOR SI! One Gift is guaranteed to one of every eleven consecutive numbers, 850,000f0r ONE DOLLAR ®fow is jour rail. Fortune helps tho; e who help themselves. 500,000 Tickets , at $1 each , num bered from 1 to 500,000, inclusive. The exceeding, tj low price of ttekets brings it toithin the reach of all. ®\h In aid of Public Improvements m the ci<y of Denison, Texas. TT-TEd TURK: AJ3 Gift Concert Ass^.tion WILL GIVE A GRAND COJi^ THURSDAY, DECEMBER 31,1874 And will distribute to the Ticket-holders $250,000 IN GILTS. DEPOSITORY, FIRST NIT. BANK, DENISON. Distribution to commence immedi itely after the Concert. Managers of distribution chosen by Ticket-holders and prominent citizens. I.TST OF gifts: 1 Grand Cash Gift $ 50,000 1 “ “ “ 25,000 1 15,000 1 10,000 1 5,000 1 2,000 1 1,500 10 .. .. .. SSOO each.. 5.000 20 250 .. .. 5,000 SO 350 .. .. 4,500 50 100 5.000 100 .. 1. .. 60 .. .. 5,000 100 25 .. .. 2.000 200 20 .. .. 4.000 500 10 .. .. 5,000 1,060 5 .. .. 5,000 1,500 24. .. .. 3,750 40,250 1".... 46 250 49,767 Grand Cash Giftsam’nt’g to $200,000 22 prizes in real estate ain't’g to 50,000 49,789 Gifts, amounting to $250,000 REFERENCES. Knowing that the management of this As sociation will lie conducted as represented, we cheerfully recommend the same to the public: James Leona-d, John Holford. John B Mc- Dougall, W II Winn, H Tone, ,1 M Cook, Aldermen city ol Denison, Texas. Judge Wm D Kirk. J Nevius, City Treasurer. W B Boss, Done Star Mills. E E Fuller, Alamo Hotel. M Go'dsoll & Cos, merchants. Wm Hughes, real estate broker. First National Bank, Deni-on. Col Frank Schrader, ex-mayor. Daily and Weekly News, Denison. Samuel A Cook, real estate broker. Col T H "Warren, real estate broker, Chas E Maurice, U S Commissioner. Col Samuel Brooks, Galveston, Texas. Jos Perry, Attorney M, K & T railroad. J W Jennings, ex-postmaster U S Senate. Col L W Shepherd, Alamo Hotel, Denison Gen G A Beul, US Army, Ft Griffith, Texas. Merchants’ and Planters’ Bink, llenison, Tex. S G Eddy. Division Supt. M, K & T railroad. Col E J Strang, (j MUS A, Denison, Texas. Goode Stinnett & Cos, cotton broker*, Denison E D Chadick, man. Cotton Compress Cos, Dcn’n A statementof the distribution will he pub lished and forwarded to ticket-holders, and all gifts promptly paid a*"ter (he distribution. GOOD and RESPONSIBLE PERSONS WANTED to w ork for the interests of this Association. Libeeal Commissions Allowed. HOW TO REMIT TO US. Money should he sent hy Express or Draft, Post-office Money Order or Registered Letter. Address all communications to ALPHEUS R. COLLINS, Sec’y, oct23-td Denison, Texas. E- T>. SCOTT & CO, BANKERS, 3 Exchange Court, NewYork T-jlToera-l MADE ON COTTON. TO THE TAX-PAYERS OF HARRIS COUNTY! Wishing to give all persons who arc sub ject to pay tax in this county a fair opportu nity pf doing so, I hereby announce the foi lowhg appointments: Goojman’s, September 10. October 8 and 81 Okli', ail's, “ 17, “ 5 Nov 8 Hamlton, “ IH, “ 0 “ 2 Whitfeville, “ 21, “ 19 “ !i David Von’s, “ 22, “ 20 “10 Whitaker’*, “ 28, “ 21 “1! Upperltith. “ 24, “ 22 “ 12 Lower Pith, “ 26, “ 28 “ 18 Blue fe|lb)g. “ 2b. “ 24 “ 14 Valiev Pains, “ 28, “ 26 “16 Milne'r’H 2b, “ 27 “ 17 WaverlylHall, “ 80, “ 28 “18 F.llerslie.V ictober 1 and 29, and November 19 Catania, tetober 2 and 80, and November 20 I reapecLully request the land owners to make out \* scnedule of tbeir did rent (arm crops, with their names attached, and have it ready foiyne at mv appointments. sep4 \ JOHN B. HASTEY, T. C. J*~VGiD Q'JACKS. B n i gentleman who has suffered AfcJßa from Nervous Debility, weakness. fj etc.,Yhe result of imprudent habits c mtractedin tenth, and who took medicine for months Athout obtaining a cure, lias since cured liWiielf permanently by very simple sanitary-yules, and an outward appli ance worn with Die utmost eccrecr ; and so satisfied is he tilt by the same means every case can be cur, A treat he will send full par ticulars free to althat are affected. Aidless Jons liAi.2, b... 5,-o, I'cYork. \ Letter from Florida. Greenwood, Ela., Oct. 29, 1874. Ei>. Visistok. —Agreeable to prom ise, I will attempt, this delightful evening, to write jyou a few lines, “which leaves me well and doing well, and hope yen (are enjoying the. same blessing.” I W<?arrived in Greenwood or* the 24th inst,, and wena pleased 'to find some improvements since visiting this place last. Several pf the storehouses have been remodeled, aii/1 present quite a handsome which add very much to the Apoks of this beautiful little villago.' k Crops in this section -nave turned out much better than*" they did last year. The twterj/&U wns general throngin':-'} ll the eonhjy, but did very little daitdbige. ''Thu continued dry wetfuuir caused the cotton to shed much of its fruit, but an estimate oi at least twenty per [cent above last year can safely be Counted on, The corn crop is not so large as last year, but as the old corn has supplied the fanners later than heretofore—thereby saving the early use'ef the present crop—the production will be ample to meet the requirements of making another crop, with probably some to spare. The cane is much injured by the continued dry weather during the summer, and will fall off about twenty per cent, though, as a general thing, enough will be made for home con sumption. Ground peas, potatoes, etc. are good. u Mr. William Butler, living near here, planted four Cuba yam potatoes, which lie procured from a gentleman passing through the neighborhood, from which he gathered seven meas ured bushels. These are the most prolific potatoes known, but it is diffi cult to keep them during the winter. The caterpillar, drought, rust, and all other calamities combined, have not affected the cotton crop in Jack son near so as the little “catch alls” that arc set up all over this country. There are a, multitude of midnight thieves who lie in wait for the cotton to be housed, and in many instanefs take H/Xfm the . field, and under oovef of mtjlnigra, barter It to these numerous “abominations.’’ The practice of buying and selling cotton, and other produce after night fall should have the condemnation of every good citizen/ The thieves have no favorites, and if is the imperative duty of every If.inner to put a stop to it; if necessary, organ ize in each neighborhood, and take the matter in their own hands. The thefts are principally by negroes, but the while man that encourages it by buying from them is but little, if any, better than the thief. The election for senator and legislators comes off next Tuesday', nml here, like every where else, a N*are of hungry office seekers stand ready to make the sac rifice and do the honors of the State. “Yours, Truly,’’ attended a regu lar old-fashioned barbecue in lee in terest ol the Democratic party, given last Friday, near Fort Jackson. Col. Jno. Erwin a cultivated gentleman, and Democratic nominee, invited your correspondent to ride down with him, and on the way we losi our course, and enquired of a rough “pine/ woods” fellow if lie could give us directions. Of course he could. “You will go to the first house and take that on yonv right hand, go on a little furt her and take the next one on your left baud, go ’till you come to another one and take that on your back, then take a half a dozen cross roads and yotTaTT lost, or J'ifl no judge.” We thanked “Fluey’’ lor his kind information and rode away, soon ,to find that we or the road was lost; nevertheless wo reached the place in time to hear some good speaking and get a fine dinner. Jno. McKinney, a young lawyer from Marianna, delivered quite an able addrfrss: also did Col. Erwin from Greenwood. West, a negro M, D., was called for, and made a spend id speech. Jfe said that Pin-man, the Radical candi date for the Eettate, is responsible for all the blood, both black and white, that has been spilt in Jackson county, lie accused him of being the cause ol’ the death of Miss Maggie McClellan, who was so brutally murdered in Marianna, and proved him to be a traitor to both races. Jfe urged the negroes to act with the Democrats and vole for their candidates. Furman is a white man, but is not half as respectable as the negro West. The Democrats are confident that they will carry the election in this county, “So mote it be.” Yours, Truly. A Visit to the Cave. Marianna, Fla,, Nov. 3, 1874. En. Visitor.— There are few, per haps, that are aware that a great natural curiosity— a wonderful cave— is (0 be seen in Jackson county, Fla. It has been the privilege of “ Yours, Truly,” to visit this cave, accompanied by an experienced guide, and a party of twenty-five*or thirty ladies and gentlemen. Our guide was a genteel and accommodating young man, and endeavored to ac quaint us with all its subterranean phenomena. 'The cave is some distance from any residence, and is in a disagreea ble swamp,—being near the Chipola river. There is a nafurnl bridge over the river, not more than half a mile from tho cave. There is a legend connected with this place—a circumstance in the time of the Indian wars in Florida. Gen. Jackson, piloted by an In dian, crossed bis troops over the nat ural bridge of Chipola, and camped near tho cave, all unconscious of its existence, while at the same time five hundred Indians were concealed within. The next day lie took up his line of march, and left the enemy to make theii exit unmolested. The surface above the cave resem bles a hillock, and is about ten feet higher than the adjacent grounds. This mound is very rugged, being covered with jugged corners of lime stone rock, of which there is an abundance near the cave. The open ing into the cave is near the top of the bill, and to go up to it is like as cending the steps of a largo building The first entrance is such that none but humble persons—persons willing to kneel —can pass. The roof is low in places, at others extended and spacious. Among the fir-t curiosi ties to be seen are the multiform sta lactites, hanging like icicles from a wintry roof, formed by the continual dripping of water, and yet the cave is seldom very damp. The water is continually falling with a tinkling click, yet it. can scarcely be discerned “ whence ft edineth or wbUfitv it gfcT etli.” Next is seen the “Lovers Leap,” a dark, deep chasm immedi ately in the pass, and can only be passed by holding to the notched rocks above. In looking into this dark vacancy,—there is “ darkness there, nothing more”—“Yours, Tru ly,” cast a large stone, which wont down its reverberating sides with sepulchral sound, never resting, over falling, so far as human mind can tell, to the cell where lies oblivion. This place is called “Lover’s Leap,” from the fact that a welcome here is given to all who crave a calm from dis appointments and grief, and here no disquieted dream of unrequited love can ever rack 1 lie bruin. To “Yours, Truly,” this appears as a prime de ceiver, ns nothing but darkness is hereto welcome the diseonsolatelovcr, and this can do no more than rest his mortal frame. Passing beyond this dismal place, we find a spacious hall, with walls of marble whiteness —the ceiling of which is supported by huge pillars of all fantastic shapes. One of those pillars bear the name of Shakspoare, from its resemblance to the aspect of that great man. AVe pass through a small aperture, and here are apartments which re semble a church, —the seats, the aisles, the gallery and the pulpit.. From this pulpit the merry crowd listened with great delight to tho mimicry of a real hard-shell sermon. Leaving the church, wo climb the rugged rock, and in the highest point of the cave , s a beautiful spring, as cold as ice and clear as crystal. A basin which holds the water is a cu riosity. Here the lights were all ex tinguished, when all was as dark as daakis ss itself. The young ladies sang iveral songs, and their voices sough), out every room and crevice. The echo and reecho borne r.pon the pure, cool air was beautiful indeed. Ag in wo lighted onr candles and repair'd to the register room, and here ~-e inscribed our names with the thousands of others already upon the walls. The names of many of the citizens of Harris county are as fresh as they were when they were inscribed there twenty years ago. Many of those who wrote their names upon these walls are now silent in ihe grave. All over the wails are seen myriads of sparkling joins, which, when crushed, are bin drops of wa ter contained in hollow spheres ot isinglass. These subteraneoug observations are delightful, but we cannot dwell longer tunotgf them at this time, so we wend our way Lack to the en trance. We bid adieu to the cave, and to you also for the present. Yours, Truly. _ A Georgia Rebel. It is a matter of history, says the New York Sun, that while Bullock w is Governor of G orgin, from which State he absconded in order to elude the officers of justice, bonds to a large amount were issued illegally. After the Bullock King bad been de posed from power the Legislature of Georgia appointed a committee to in vostbnto tho circumstances under which various descriptions of bonds were issued, and decide upon the question of tlieir validity, it being un derstood that the State would repu diate all liabilities for the payment of all fraudulent issues. While tho pro ceedings growing out of this measure were in progKess, the holders of some of the oonlosted bonds sent a retainer of $5,000 to Gon. Bob. Toombs, with a request that he should appear be fore the legislative committee and ad vocate the payment of the bonds, but tho unrepentant old rebel refused to receive tho retainer, saying in effect; “I don’t want your money. I jm-o pose to appear before the legislative committee in the interests of Georgia, and without, charge toiler, and I will spend SIO,OOO of my own money to prevent the payment of your rascally bonds.” Please Stop My—What? —We clip the following sensible hints from tho Baptist Watchman: “Times arc hard, and money is scarce, business is dull, retrenchment is a ditty—please stop my —’’ Whis key? “0, no; times are not hard enough for that. But boro is some thing else that costs mo a large amount of money every year, Avhich 1 wish to save. I’leaso stop my—” Tobacco, cigars, snuff? “No, no, not these; but I must retrench somewhere please stop my” Rib bons, jewols, ornaments and trinkets ? “Not at all: pride must ho fostered, if times aro ever so hard ; but T be lieve I can roc a w-ay to effect quite a saving in another direction) please stop my—'” Ton, coffee, and un healthy luxuries? “No, no, no, not those, I must think of something else, /dqi.l luty/ it now. My paper costs $2,00 a 'year ; I must save thaf! That, w ill carry me through the panic easily. I believe inretreiichment and economy, especially in brains.’’ American Pencil Factory.—Sev en years of patient study have result ed in the invention of n series of ma chines by which Amerf an lead pen cils aro made, in Jerse City, entirely by machinery. From he time tho plumbago and rough strips of cedar and other woods enter the maeliineiy until they arc turned out together, polished lead pencils, ready to be tied up hi packages, no hand labor is re quired. The materials used are American, the plumbago coming from Tieonderago, New York State, and i lie Cedar from Florida. The pencils are made of .five different grades, and they are said to be of such a,quality that they can compete at once with (he best pencils of German manufac ture. If such bo the case, American pencils will have no difficulty in find ing a market, for the process by which thoy arc manufactured is tho cheapest in the word. The D/sgkacj.fi: . Goat,— There is and old goat ow n;] on Lewis street which lias received a greht deal of training from the boys. Last Fourth of July they discover ed that if they stuck a fire cracker in tho end of a cane and held it at Wil liam, he would lower his head and go tor them, and they have practiced the trick so much that the goat will tackle any human being who points a stick at him. Yesterday noon he was loafing near the corner of Third and Lewis streets, when a corpulent citizen came up and stopped to talk with a friend. They happened to speak of the side-walk, when the cor pulent eitiz n pointed his cane to the left of the goat and said, “That’s the worst piece of side-walk in this to wn.” Tiie goat Lad been eyeing the cane, and tlie moment it came up he low ered bis head, made six or c-igi)t jumps, and his head struck the cor pulent citizen just on the bolt. The man went over into a mass of old tin, dilapidated butter.kegs and abandon ed hoop skirts, and the goat turned a somersault the other way, while the slim citizen threw stones at a boy seated ou a doorstep who was laugh ing tears as big us chestnuts and cry ing out: “Oh ! it’s nuff to kill a fel ler ! Detroit Free J A ress. BffirTbe newspaper is a sermon for the thoughtful, a library for the poor, and a blessing to everybody. $2.00 A YEAR. WIT and RUMOR. There is a sly fellow up town who lias laughed in bis sleeve so much iliat it lias be tome threadbare. Births are being announced as “Our Young Folks for April,” in the Turner Falls, Mass., Reporter. Placards on tho St. Louis street cars declare that “This car can’t wait tor ladies to kiss good-by.’’ A Georgia paper promises to pub lish a ‘-thrilling cereal.** Its readers will make an oat of it. If a man is killed by his hired man, should tho coroner render a verdict of “killed by his own band?’* Value the friendshiji of him who stands by you in storm ; swarms of insects will surround you in sunshine. Macbeth must have been a tobacco chewor, as his way of life had fallen “into the sear and yellow leaf.” Two horns will last an ox a life time, but many a man wants that niuuhei every morning before,break fast. Why is a London milkman like Pharaoh’s daughter? Because lie takes a little profit out of the water. Juynesville lias an educated jig called Ben Butler. There is a chance for a libel suit,—on tho part of tho 1%- Why do women talk less in Febru ary than in any other month ? Be cause it iR the shortest month in the year. A New Jersey paper boasts of a new subscriber one hundred and three years old. Wo shouldn’t call him very new. The Democrat at Mayesville, Ky., announces the marriage of James Legget, of Buckskull, to Sally Drink ard, of Buckshort. “Don’t count your chickens before they are batched.” Enumerate not your adolescent pulle ts ere they cease to be oviform. An agricultural paper recommends a quart of brandy to cure the stag gers. We havo thought brandy was the cause of staggers. “This engine won’t work,” said a fireman to the chief of the fire depart ment. “No wonder,” was the repfy; “it was made to play.” The difference between a tale-bear er and sealing-wax is, that sealing wax burns to keep a secret and tie tale-bearer burns to tell one. The editor of a Nashville paper is accused by his neighbors of having caught cold while sleeping in church with his pew door open. Sidney Smith was once visiting tho conservatory of a young lady who was fond of her flowers, and used (not very accurately) a profusion of botanical names. “Madafne,” said be, “have you the si plonk psoriasis?” “I had it last winter, and gave it to the Archbishop of Canterbury, and it came out beaulif dly in the spring ” Soptenis psoriasis is tho medical name for the seven years ilch. An exchange has an acquaintance who remarks that he Las oftenjieard the proverb, “A friend in need is a friend indeed,” but ho nays lie can’t seo where the laugh comes in. He has a friend in need who is always borrowing money of him. “Do you know why you are like the third term?” said Susan Jane to her brother, who lingered to talk with her Adolphus after the old folks had retired. “Ho, I don’t.” “Weil,” replied his saccharine sister, “it’s be cause yon are one too many-. A negro insisted his race was men tioned in tho Bible, for be had heard tho preacher read,. “Nigger Demus wanted to be born asraiu.’* “I v.a< on the trail of a doai,” re- market! a young man who had trod on the trail of a beautiful maiden’s dress the othar night. ° • A young man charged with bein lazy, waa asked if he took it from his father. “I t hink not,” was the reply; “father’s got all the laziness he ever had.” A little follow tumbled into a foun tain and managed to crawl out before any one reached him. Pale and dripping he was put to bed, and wheu his mother requested the young man to thank God for saving him, Young America answered: “I ’spose God did save me, but then I held on to the gw ass, too.” An Illinois woman who wanted to go to a masquerade party dressed as Mary Queen of Scots, looked through the Bible to see how the character was dressed. |