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VOL II~NO. 45. fiainilton Visitor n w. I). BOULLY, Proprietor. SUBSCRIPTION RATES. copy three months (5 nv one furnishing five subscribers, with ' money, will receive a copy free. c„l,seribcrP wishing their papers changed , nne no- t-office to another, must state of the post office from which they changed, as well as that to which wish . |t sent ft Ali'' nhsrriptious must be paid in advance. The paper will be stopped at the etuKof the | m naiil for, unless subscriptions are pre liouslv renewed. fifty numbers complete the year, CASH ADVERTISING RATER. "Trir-s 1 mr> S mos 6 mos 12 mos O&rz r2M) $ 4 50 TToo $ 10 00 1 “hes . 450 725 11 00 18 00 1 ndttg 500 90015 00 22 00 Inc ef- 550 11 00 18 00 27 00 in.. 660 14 00 25 00 35 00 ! mn 12 50 25 00 40 00 60 00 tjZ,:.' 22 00 41 00 62 00 100 00 ' M'd deaths not exceeding six n-'J will h: published free. Payments to he made quarterly in advance, according to schedule rates, unless otherwise '°Pcrsons°eending advertisements, will state th length of time they wish them published an i the space they want them to occupy. ■Parties advertising by contract will he re itrictod to their legitimate business. Legal advertisements. Sheriffs sales, per inch, four weeks. $3 50 " mortgage fi fa sales, per inch, ei/ht weeks ■ • 6 * Citation for letters of administration, guardianship, etc., thirty days. ■ • ■ • • 3 00 Notice to debtors and creditors of an estate, forty days “ lK> Application for leave to sell land, four Sat'S of iaridv vtc. per in li, forty days 5 00 “ *"• “ perish ah'3 property, per inch, Application foi letters of dismission from guardianship, forty days. ° w Application for letters of dismission from _ administration, three months < w Establishing lost papers, the full space of three months, per inch •• • w Compelling titles from executors or ad ministnitors, wliere bonrt b* been given by the deceased, the full space __ of three months, per inch < Estray notices, thirty days ■ ■ • ■ Buie for foreclosure of mortgage, four mouths, monthly, per inch ” YV Rale of insolvent papers, thirty days. • ■ j* w Homestead, two weeks ' Business coytSe W. T. POOL, D. S., BaaiD Street, COLUMBUS, GA., Will vLit Hamilton and vicinity once a Hoatli duriu't the -iuiomer. All calls i.rumpi ]y itfcnded to Plate work and tillinfS done lu tl best and latest styles. (Satisfaction or no charge. luayß thn i a nuasKLt. c * mvm-kil AUSSELL £ RUSSELL, ATTORNEYS AT LAW, COLUMBUS, GEORGIA Will practice in all tlio (‘tale Courts. TDr. rr. i_t- Jonlcms, HAMILTON, GA. TfclOS. S. MITCHELL, M. I)., Resident I'liytitian and Surjeaß, MA3IILTON, GEORGIA Special attention given to Opera tive Pur |ery and treatment of Chronic Diseases. Terras Cash. jjpVVVIU, TIQ-NEH, dentist, ; COLUMBUS, * * GEORGIA. Office over Chapman’s dme stove. Ran dolph st, near city terminus of N An. -“• f Respecfuli y Offers his services to the peo ple of Harris county. |U • CHA TTAHOO CHEE 110 USE, By J T.HIGGINBOTHEM. WEST POINT, GA HEN Y C. CAMERON, Attorney at Law, HAMILTON, GA DR. I. W. CAMERON , HAMILTON, GA. Special attention to Midwifery. Charge# moderate. Mines Dozioi*, ATTORNEY-AT LAW HAMILTON, GEORGIA Will practice in the Chattahoochee Circuit, or anywhere else. All kinds of collections ifcsHTO —either way. it X int no us e COLUMBUS, GA. J. W. RYAN, Prop’r. RUBY RESTAURANT, . Bar and Billiard Saloon, UNDER THE RANKIN HOUSE, janie J. W- RIAN, Prop's, i P’ tiAMi£,TON ®SIS Visitor. ‘DOMESTIC’ FASHIONS. All of the latest stylos in dress furnished in patterns cut to any measure—price from ten to thirty cents each. Send for Catalogue, which is free to all. ‘DOMESTIC’ SEWING MACHINE. The most perfect and reliable machine in the world, and capable of doing work that no other machine ran. Sena for prices and directions how to choose. ‘DOMESTIC’ MAGAZINE. A beautiful Family Journal, published monthly at $1 50 a year—intended hi make home happy. Send for specimen number price 25 cents. Address DOMESTIC S. M 00., ju!3 (iin 27 Marieita st, Atlanta, Ga. TIFF. T- MOORE, At Van Riper’s old Stand, COLUMBUS, GEORGIA jOffern his services as a I s is. otosx* o, jp la-o x* to aU wanting Pictures from card to life size. Old Pictur* s can be copioil, enlarged and colored in a satisfactory manner, in oil or water. experience ani unsurpassed facilities enable me to offer us good inducements as an*; Gallery in the State. All work guaran teed to suit or no cunrge, at rates h low aw any. ju)3-6m J. & J. KAUFMAN, ■wholesdxe EKti-ra* im GROCERIES, Provisions, Liquor, Tobacco, BAGGING AND TIER, And *ll articles in the Grocery Link *n<l its branches. We odl a* low as any other House in this city. Km. 14 4 HI Bf#A St., COLI'MtS, fit. Mr. JOHN W. nODO, of Harris conntv, i with us, and will he pleased to see his friends aud acquuiu lances, and take pleasure in s,Vy ing them. J. & J. KAUFMAN. MAGIC ERASIVE SOAP, For removing Ditch, Paint, Tar, Grease and Rosin ft om Clothes and Carpets. This soap wilt n’so cure nearly nil itincazf* of the shin that flesh is heir to. *lt will cure a bum or scald quicker than any other known remedy. Use it for tetter, ringworm, suit rheum, fevor sores, ulcers, rough skin, tan and freckles, pimples or blotches on the face, erysipelas or neuralgia; also for shaving and shampooing. It is undoubtedly the finest article for keeping the skin white and soft that has ever been manufactured. J also manufacture a superior article of Laundry >Soap. which I sell at the unprece dented low price of four and a half cents per pound—warranted to give satisfaction. Address M. McKEIGHAN, sole proprietor and manufacturer, Atlanta, Ga. oct3o-3m J. H. ERAMHALL, WATCHMAKER, JEWELER, and Singer Sawing Machine Ag’t 99 Broad St., Columbus, Ga. HAMILTON, HARRIS CO., GA, FRIDAY, NOV. 20, 1874. A FORTUNE FOR 81! One Gift is guaranteed to one of every eleven consecutive numbers, $50,000 for ONE DOLLAR KQW ZB YQTFE TIME. Fortune helps those who help themselves. 500,000 Tickets , at $1 each , num bered from 1 to 500,000, inclusive. The exceedingly low price of tickets brings it within the reach of all. In aid of Public Improvements in the city of Denison, Texas. THE TEXAS Gift Concert Association ■WILL GIVE A GRAND CONCERT THURSDAY, DECEMBER 31,1874 And will distribute to the Ticket-holders $250,000 IN GIFTS. DEPOSITORY, FIRST NIT. BASK, BENIjjON. Distribution to commence immediately after the Concert. Managers of distribution chosen by Ticket-holders and prominent citizens. LIST OF GIFTS: 1 Grand Cash Gift $ 50,000 1 “ “ 25.000 1 15,000 1 10,0001 1 5,000 *1 2,600 1 1.500 10 SSOO each.. 5,000 20 250 .. .. 5.000 30 150 .. .. 4.500 50 100 .. .. 6,000 100 50 .. .. 5.000 100 25 .. .. 2.500 200 20 .. .. 4.000 500 10 .. .. 5,000 1,000 ■ 5 .. .. 6,000 1,500 .. .. 21 3.750 40,250 1“ ~ .. 46 250 49,767 Grand Cash Gifts am’nt’g to $200,000 22 prizes in real estate am’t’g to 50,000 49,789 Gifts, amounting to $250,000 REFERENCES. Knowing that the management of this As sociation will be conducted aw reprrsent-ed. we cheerfully recommend the same to the public: .T imes Leona and, John Holfurd, John B Mc- Dongal!, W H Wiun, II r r-ne, J M Cook Alderman city of Denison, Texas. Judge Wm l) Kirk. J Kevins, City Treasu'er. B [loss, Done Star Mills. We* kl v Times, Dcni^n. K E Fu'L r, Alamo Hotel. M Goldsf JI & 00, merchants. Wm Hughes, real estate broker. First National Bank, Deni-on. Col Frank Schrader, ex-mayor. Dai'y aud Weekly News, Denison. Ranine! A Cook. Veal estate broker. Col T H Warr-n, real estate broker. Chap E Maurice, U S Commissioner. Col Samuel Brooks, Galveston, Texas. Job Perry, Attorney M. K & T railroad. J W Jennings, ex-postmaster U S Senate. Col L W Shepherd. Alamo Hotel. Denison Gen G A Beui, US Army. Ft Griffith, Texas. M rchants’ and Planters’ Bank. Denison,'lex. S G Eddy. Division Supt. M, K & T railroad. Col K J Strn", Q M USA, Denison, Texa. Goode Stinnett & Cos, cotton brokers, Denison EDCbadick, man. CottonCompreßßCo, Den’n A statement of the distribution will be pub lished and forwarded to tii ket-holders. and all gifts promptly paid after the distribution. GoBad RESPONSIBLE PERSONS WASTED hi work for the interests of this Association. Lises* l Commissions Allowed. HOW TO REMIT TO US. Money should be sent by Expre-sor Draft, Port-office Money Order or Registered Letter. Address all communications to ALPHEUS R. COLLINS, Sec’y, oct23-td Denison, Texas. E- 3P- SCOTT & CO, BANKERS, 3 Exchange Court, NewYork Liitoeral Advances MADE ON COTTON. TO THE TAX-PAYERS OF HARRIS COUNTY! Wishing to give all persons who are sub ject to pay tax in this county a fair opportu nity of doing so, I hereby announce the fol lowing appointments: Goodman’s, Septemlier 10, October 3 and 31 Cochrao’s, “ 17, “ 5 Nov 3 Hamilton, “ 18, “ 6 “ 2 Whitesville, “ 21, “ 19 “ 9 Davidson’s, " 22, “ 20 “ 10 Whitaker’s, “ 23, “ 21 “11 Upper 19th. " 2-4. “ 22 “12 Lower 19th, 11 25, “ 23 “ 13 Blue Spring. •• 20, " 24 “14 Valley Plains, “ 28, “ 20 “ 10 Milner’s, ” 2l>, “ 27 “17 Waverly Hall, “ 30, “ 28 “18 Kller-lie, October 1 *nd 29 and November 19 Catania. October 2 and 30. 'andCovember 20 I respectfully request the land owners to make out a sere dale of their different farm crops, with their names attached, and have it ready for me at my appointments. sep4 JOHN B. HASTEY, T. C. Avoid quacks. A gentleman who has suffered from Nervous Debility, weakness, etc., the result of imprudent habits contracted in youth, an i who took medicine for months without obtaining a cure, lias s’nce cured himself permanently by very simple sanitary rules, rd an outward appli an,.„ worn with the utmost secrecy ; and s-i satisfied is he that by the same means every case can he cured, that he will send full par •iculars fiee to all that are affected. Address . Viuai Lamb, boa 3386, Nw Yorit. ALMOST A GHOST STOIIT. “ Did you ever see a ghost’ ” was the appeal. “ Well, I. came: deuced near it, I can tell you,” said young Howard. “llow near?’’ dried the company, drawing their chairs to the fire. “It was in that desolate, God-for saken part of New Jersey,” said Howard, “near P-v-negat, Shoals. What with the nature of the soil there, its barrenness and sterility, the jagged, repelling grimness of the rocks, and the wild, desolate infinity of the waters, there’s something about Barnogat that breeds an affini ty with ghosts and spectres. There bad been a wreak >f„ a '.eoasiing schooner in tiie viein’ly, and although the news didn’t make much of a sen sation in the newspapers, it brought despair and desolation to one heart at least—that of the young mate’s mother. He was an old school-mate and warm friend of my own, and 1 volunteered to go down and Ree if, the body could be found and brought' home. “ When I reached there the whole aspect of the place struck me as for bidingly wild and lonely; and when, toward the close of a stormy day, poor old Jack’s body was washed ashore, stark and stiff, nrd distorted almost beyond recognition, I wasn’t able to lend the fellows down there a helping band. I was seized with a nervohs chill, and went in doors to the brandy-flask. Propped up with an artificial courage, 1 went out again and found them hauling their helpless burden towards a fisherman's hut close by. They bad flung it in an old tarpaulin blanket, and I couldn’t help protesting inwardly against, the rude Way in which they bumped it along through the break ers and over the rocks. “I thought of that tender, wom anly heart at home in the east, and the gentle reverence that hedged about even her every thought and feeling about Jack, and f determined there and then that he .should be ta ken home to her ig some shape that wouldn’t appall or horrify her. “ They lunched at me when I spoke of n cofiin, but nevertheless I resolved npon get I ill" one, if such a tiling could be had for love or money. Not ihfti a coffin is absolutely requis ite in'nil cases. Ii wouldn’t, have mattered a pin io either Jack or my self if, tied up in an old tarpaulin, with a weight heavy as destiny it self, we were forced to the bottom of the sea. But to a woman, an old church-ridden, conventional woman, a victim to circumstance and custom, a coffin was the only thing i hat could vender the affair respectable, or in deed bearable. “I passed a sleepless night,, and went off before daylight in search o' an old man hat bore a queer reputa tion about there for appropriating any thing that came in shore, and rendering it useful or ornafneninl with a rude knack he had in the car penter line. The boys told me there was a little of everything in his old rookerv, and they hadn’t the least doubt, f conhl even find a coffin there, or something that could be modeled into one. “Tl was a good h*ngitp to Us dwelling, and I penHicd ilici’c wbb a foreboding tliril my joiiniey u.is p>r notliing; but njion iiroacbitig-ibosiilf jeol to him, be slated bis road'nfsj at. once lo oontp’y with my dorrand. “‘But vvliai will you do lor maio l 'ills? ” I asked. “ ITo suil’ei' vrijn’y, arid opening a door that led up to n soil of loft, bn beckoned me to follow him. In'fluff, loft i bore was wood readily adapted to build a sli'p. a bouse, a tlieatn— any ibiug and every thing ihut>nlubl !>e desired. Not common wood, Li ok you, but wreckers’ materiel.— pi tie's of French walnut, exquisitely car veil tv basvo'iei', biis of precious ebony, of Reads’.wood, of box, and some of that delicate tvb le pinetbai e.vliales a delicious s jp riii ive. Tlie boys bad said that, be was very#>•>;• ia the cfirpente" Mne. i was iu spl.cd wilbato , of lip 1 in bis < a ! nci.y, anti bis willi.ig.it s to under take the j'.b tvns o.s’y ce rlcd by .us dc e luinatioii .0 lie • >n:■ 1 well io-' do iug it. “‘Don’t, yon fret, young, men,’ said the oln skeleton. • T'i 1 iix i. fo ■ you in a sbajie that’ll s< : ii. I’ll have it ns scrumptious as a nui —that is, e> you’re able to liear the heft of the expense. It’s costly, yev know, to hev tilings pious and nice down this wav; we can’t a'Ws afford it; tli.-n the sea bein’ handy, it’s a temptation to save time and money; but efthe expense ain’t eonnte it:—’ “ ‘ Xevv mind th expense, part.,’ I exclaimed. ‘You do the thing up nicely for me, and I’ll see yon through; but it must be don- at once; the body is almost beyond saving now, and I want the coffin by to-morrow-night. It must be ready to bo shipped be fore daybreak the next morning.’ ‘“All right,’ Raid tho old screw. ‘I don’t mind losin’ a little sleep to be obligin,’ ef only the expense— ’ “ ‘You old vulture,’ I roared, I’ll pay you half on the spot!’ Ami J counted out to him enough green backs to make his sharp old nose come down and chop over his chin with an unctuous smack of apprecia tion. ‘“I’ll hov it that scrumptious,’said the wretch, with greedv enthusiasm, -that you'll clap your hands over it. It'll bo that peart and pious that you needn’t be ashamed of it in a church!* “I nodded approvingly, and started on the home stretch with the com fortable feeling of a man who has done all he could to ameliorate an irremediable suffering. All that day there was a threatening aspect of the winds and waves that boded more mischief on tV-it, malevolent shore. Massive heavy clouds hung black as ink over the sharp jagged rocks, and a fierce under-tone in the elements told of a conspiracy for a tempestu ous debauch. “My poor old Jack lnd been washed and shaven, his last toilet ren dered with nil die care that his old friend, and school-fellow could be stow upon a melancholy labor of love; ,a few hot tears burst from my burn ing eyes, and fell upon that strange and unfamiliar face; and finding it become less and less recognizable as T gazed npon it, I covered ii rever ently with nay handkerchief, and sal. silent and alone with it and the dark ness, waiiing for the old man with the coffin. “As the day waned and Iwi'igV gathered, a wail broke forth Irom the rocks and waves; a tew belated gulls flopped tlicir wings heavily over the water (hat began to lash furiously the low sandy shore. Presently a few drops fell, the precursors of one of tlioe furious storms that riot on that desert const. “An agony of impatience seized me. I got upon my feet, and paced lo arid fro the louse hoardsofthe lint. “ Was I, then, condemned to stay here, powerless 1o save niv poor Jack from being (he puppet of yon der malignant fends of (lie shore and ihesea? T knew if the coffin were delayed uniil the storm increased in I ary. Ihe road to the old wrecker’s home would be impassable, flooded, aid without a dew. “ Was it. then, destined that he -■hon'd be thrown into the greedy maw of the sea, after ail, and his place in (be dear litlle oh well-yard at, home know him no more? There were prayers even then offered up for him in that dear little village in the vallev, not only by the thin and with ered lips of his mother, hut sweet and roseai ones were trembling in It's behalf that late had clung to liis own in rnpflive, and gentle young fingers would gather flowers for his grave and inminur benisons there lor many a year. Oh, was it, then, inrw-sitde to give this joy to my poor old Jack ? “I stalled up with n melcd'ch in u ion tbe florin a.id ils sn •roundings, and witb an impulse of despciaiion wrapjied niysell’ in au old tiirjirml'n and ventured forth, “I suppose mv nerves were pret.v well unstrung, fertile dead face, ol mv lost comrade followed me with a grotesque and horrible pr- : sl e.ricy. 1 st vnegled against the feeling, but it seemed to nio the murky air was full oi sbiq.ielcsH floods and bodib .s spirits of devilish tmipfnqni. !es. “BlqinbVng along, the rain beat ing merejlessly down, milking the oe|;y path iieriloiLslv sinoe •, I made vny way slowi/ ill the di l .•ctiori <>'■' the old wrecker’s abode. *■ Feeling ihe pa.li step by st > ; n and sto**in, it l i*M have tnkeii me many hones f o irn li-.ii a mile, for 1 had scarcely gone Itfdf-vvay when I found by my w.-.lcli ii was nearly midnigb'. I’iie same lurid gleam of lightning that allowed me the i'-’cc oi iny watch gave me al so a fleet glimpse of something lying in the road before me, almost at my feet. “ I looked, and started back in hor ror: a peculiar sensation came to my scalp; I felt my hair, so to speak, rising on cud; lor there, in a defile of the road, half wedged in the shel ter of a rock, was a coffin. Tho pe culiar shape of it was only dimly dis cornablc, and either exaggerated by this dimness or else the coffin was of •rtffstitie size. ITowdid it get, there? Did the fiends about me contrive this shape to deceive my half delirious senses? I looked again, and slowly I saw the ponderous lid rise, a skele ton hand came forth; then an arm. At his* half of the form emerged front this terrible rest.ino-.plnce, and, wrapped about with a winding-sheet, seemed struggling to leave the coffin altogether. “T seized mv pistol with a trem fii ng hamb T cocked it. “ ‘ Don’t shoo* young man!’ onod iho snoot re. ‘Yo’ll snilo the polish, cf vor do. This cussed rain has e’on o’most done for it already. It was pious end noe'-t. a Knoll back, but it’s pretty well spiled now, I’m af'ard.’ “It was mv oil wrecker, carpen ter, and coffin-maker, TTo explained to mo that be, had started on time with the coffin, and kept ap till the storm had come noon him, and was forced to rest awhile under the over hanging rock. TTc thought, very nronerlv. that no hotter shelter could he found than tho coffin itself; and he was rh'ht. We might both have crept inside,' and there would have been room for more. Wbv on earth did von make if so big?’ T said. *T don't want my poor Jack to lie around loose in this way. ' “'Well, where’s tho odds?’ said ;he accomodating nr!inr>. * "You didn’t scorn to spare the entente; so T llmeght I’d leave nlenty of elbow room. We can find snt.hin or other for ballast, T reckon down below.’ “Poor Jack lies to this day in tho singular coffin thus provided for him, and over him the arbutus blooms, and tender violet f, and all the dainty flowers dear to a young girl’s fancy i r an old woman’s love.’’ WoNnrr.miT, Ritsotj units op Texas. —One of tins Texas delegation ofmez ehauts recently sent to Si. Louis to consult in regard to direct trade, re marked at ihn St. T.ouis Exchange ;ha! no one is yet tlwoii lily ac quainted with the vast, resources of that Slate. Its wonderful grazing canacily is indicated by the fact that if exports 000,000 heed of eat lie per annum. Tl, is declared noon good aniboiity that even under ils present meagre system of cultivation it can produce, with any thin" like a fair vic'd, one bab? o' cotton, t won’ v-iivo bnshe’s of wbea , forty bushels of corn, aud six! v bushels of oats tot be acre. Texas idenied last, year i,)00,- 000 acres in cotton; Georgia i.°00,- 000 acres; Ab bfma T,900,000 acres, and Mi -I si-mi i TOO,OOO acres; and not w’; bs'anding I o fact that Teens rkilled p half mil on less acres tbno MiHM*Mnpi v ii, i-- n w estimated thai she wi'l malic qh-j as much if not more cotton than any n;LYr Slate. Tt. him-: not be lingo;ton [bat they have in Texas over ] J 0,000,000 ac os of'and—a B;afo six times as "urge as die Slate of Pemww’vcoin; and as its development may bp said lo hr vc jn>l cin-.i.Tieucod, ii, miy v.c'l be led to imaginatioti to say what, her future will be. Soc- Theodore Parker married ii Ap-.il 1f;3(5, Lvdia 1). C.'-A only daughter of Jot’ii Cabot of Newton, with whom bp bad plighted troth live years previously. The following eo!etions are entered in lus journal on Ids wedding day: I. Neve’, except for the boat of ••ani.es, to oppose my wife’s will, 9, To discharge all ser dees for her sake freely. 3. Never to tcnld. 4. Never lo look cross id her. 5. Never to weary her with . m lii arid-. 6. Promote her piety. 7. To bear her burdens. 8. To overlook her foibles. 9. To love, cherish, and ever de fend her. 10. To remember her always most affectionately in my prayers; thr.s, God willing we shall be blessed. In an article upon American watch manufacturing, a contemporary states that it represents a capital of nearly five million dollars, and that the an nual production of watches in this country is about two hundred thous and. $2.00 A YEAR. WIT iui.l HUMOR. Drawing materials—corkscrews, j Men of the time—chronometer ma kers. When is a girl not a girl ? Wi en she is a baby. When is a balloon not a balloon? When it is aloft. A health that is very rarely drank —the public health. Farmers gather what they sow. but seamstresses sew what they gath er. A pickpocket never to much in his business until he gets his hand in. A Wisconsin dairyman asks for in formation about the “cremation” business. Why does grass resemble'a pen knife? Because tho spring brings out the blades. There is one suit in which a man nover feels satisfied, and that is a law-suit. A gentleman said, when a pretty girl trod on his toes, that he had re ceived a stamp of beauty. The genius who is to 'invent a practical substitute for work has not yet been horn—and never will be. Tho poor old father of a bootblack sayß nothing gives him moro pleasure than to seo tho son shine. A Methodist minister being recentj Iv asked if ho had moved to his new appointment, said: “Yes, but it is a disappointment.” Bogianing of a Judge’s charge In Iowa: “Gentlemen of the jury, you must now quit eating peanuts and at tend to this case.’’ A New York woman to shield her husband, who was charged with re moving the end of her rose, swore that she bit it off hersolf. Beware of contracting friendship with surgeons. When you most need their sorvicos they will probably cut you. “Dear,” said a good old lady who was unable to keep up with her work, “T shall bo glad when I get into eter nity, no ns to have plenty of time for everything.” The difference he tv, een noted in on and noted women is said to be that them,' n always like lo see themselves in piint, and that, the women prefer to sen themselves in silks and velvets. A revelers exclamation about bis pus p jivt: “Ob ! that someone, asr Col idi >n threatened to do with Rus sia, world crnmnle up the passport, literally, like a sheet of paper.” A Indy teacher in a national school was amazed by seeing ft perfect for est of juvenile hands fly up in the air, ami shako and gesticulate with vio lence, “kYhat, do you want?’’ Cho ms; “Tor hair’s failin’off?’ A pcddlnr calling on an. old lady (o dispose of some- good*, inquired of her if she could tell him of any road on which no peddlar bad travelled, “Yes,” replied she; “I know of one and that’s tbo road to heaven.” The Chicago’ reporters are tender ofthe feelings of the unfortunates; ii 1 so )l>e daily papers of that city veeanlly announced that “two ladies and three gentlemen left for the pen i entlary last evening under official escort.’’ , “Put me in the same room,” say* an old philosopher, “with n number of young girls, and I will tell you, when the postman knocks—merely bv watching the looks of some and the actions of Ihe others—how many of them arc in love.” A ynnng gentleman remarked to bis female companion the othi ; even ing, “Ah! the most beautiful ever ing in my recollection. Luna looks peculiarly beautiful.” “Was that herjnst went by?’’ quickly asked the vonng lady. “She sunk up and buuV down twice!’’ exclaimed a little six-year old while explaining to her mother how her playmate fell into a pond. The man who by mistake took a drink from a bottle of muscilage, aaye he has felt ‘iettick np” ever since. A scapegrace remarked that the principal branch of cdneatioia in his school, was a willow bratich.jj Man is mister, but a Woman is a mystery'. The latest fashion in Chicago—one term marriages. The markets—Ladies hair has an upward tendency.