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VOL. III.—NO. 50. Cltcljiunilton Visitor D. W. 0. BOULLY, Proprietor. CASH SUli'Cßll’VioN RATES. On* copy ■ no ' e*r $2 00 (na ropv s'x months 1 00 Ote copy three months 75 Any one furnH'lngr five subscribers, with ,j,c nionev, will receive a copy free. Sabsciibow wi-biw* tlieiv papers chnneeT fv.jiii ov.e p<>- t oftice to another, mint state ♦ tie name of the post office from which they wisii it change 1, as well as that to Which they wish it sent. All subscriptions must lie pni'l in advance The paper ill he stopped at the end of the time paid for. unless sub: ip',; ms are pre viously renewed. fifty numbers complete U. . r, amt AI}VEUTISi> I ■. t A !'Eh , tjr F1 mo it in f mi's |'2 mos 7 g 2 50 Si - *. 00’ : 10 Of) u iit'lic: 150 •" 11 00 18 00 * 500 0. of)j 1-. .00 22 00 j inciie- .5.50 „1T JJtl Is 00 • 27 00 ( column. • j 1150* UOO 25 00 85 00 1 cotnmn. .112 50 25f00! 40 00 00 00 5 enlmuo I 22 00 41 00l 02 00 K'O 00 Mandates and Uo-.'tbe let OxeoeJilig six jims will be published free Payments to be nude quarterly in advance, acoordini to schedule r ites, unh ss otherwise sg-eed upon. Persons eemling adver*iKPm"nts will state the length 'if time t 1 ev wish tloon miblished and ttie spice they want them to oc m v. Parties adver'i->n' by contract will be re gtrictel to their legitimate business. T)E<u£ advbutwbiests. Sheriffs sales, per inch, four weeks.. .$3 50 ■ > mortgage ti fa sales, per inch, eight weeks ....... 5 50 Citation for letters of administration, "”i r 'ian-ddn, etc., thirty days 3 00 Xotiee to debtors and creditors of an estite. forty davs 5 00 Application for leave to sell land, four weeks } Sales of land, etc., per in U, forty- days o 00 *• “ perishable property, per inch, ten davs 2 00 Application for letters of dismission from eti irdianslitn. forty davs 5 00 Am Mention for letters of dismission from admin' tntion. three m -ntlis 7 50 Establishing b st paper*, the full spare of three m-mths. per inch 1 00 Compelling titles from executors or ad ministrators. where bond has been then by the deceased, the full space of three months, per in -1) j TIT* E rav n tiers, thirty days 3 00 Bn e for foreclosure of moitcagc, four month*, men hlv. per : noh 0 00 S-de of insolvent papers, thirty days... 300 two week o - Tt ;.xsi ness Opt c3.s jsr- T- ii- j'eiil^ins, D N • TlfiT, - 7 3 - V '--t - ' %::y/...; v^V-- _ *5-* ... _. - - =-'" r ' HAMILTON. US. 11l os. S. MITCHELL, M. L>., lirsidi n) Physician anil Silicon, HAMILTON GEORGIA fqwial atientionygiven to o| eraiive surgery 'pn~ Terms osh *jp PRESTON GIBHt 1 , * s SURGEON and PHYSICIAN, Hamtt/ton, Ga. Wi'l't'C frmnit'at the ho* ! or tho store of W H J. ’nn b n milf-s profr i' v '■nvaved. CJIA TIAIIOOCFU HOUSE, ■>v J. T HIGGIn : .) i Lt. *;. WKSI POINT. Ci A ~ALONZO A. DOZiGl’, Attokney and Counselor at Law, COLUMBUS, GA. Practices in State and Federal Courts in Georgia are' Alabarua: Make-* Comrr ercinl IJt w a specialty. Offi* e over C. A. Re bi & Co’s store, Columbus, Ga. dec4-1 v Ilincs Dozier, ATTORNEY-AT LAW, HAMILTON, GEORGIA Will practice in the 01 attain och*e Circuit, or anywhere else. Office in the Northwest •orner of tV e Court-lue s**, up-stairs. j arj ß Columbus Dental Rooms, W. T. POOL, .Proprietor, rtrrp'n Frrr TritOn? r<lnmLiis fia. Jij\ NKINH OUSE COLUMBUS, GA. ffes. F. NL GRAY, Proprietress- A. SFi.r/rn*, Clerk. JL K(EHNK, merchant tailor, JJi Jrsftd C!ebtis, Gn, His on bn4 ofO. n t!• fyr fJ'wW;. French CissiiiMrieE, Ytttfin"?, etc. Ca ting done at rest enable rate . Have your cVti os made by me. end I enar trnte** i>erft- t Kati*-fac f i'*n in stvle and price JHOUSE ANLf SIGN PAINT]NG. I am now prepared to do any kind of Paint in?—Hnnae. Si nor Ornamental. I nan mend your Umbiellas and Parasols, anH m ke them as good its new. Prices low. Give me a trial. My' shop i opposite the market-house, Columbus, Oa. junll-em w. D. SMITH, Natural Artist. Hamilton Ig I Visitor A FftSuT FOE LIFE. It w as in the latter part of Novem ber 18■ 4,_that I found tnvself at sun set, on oue of the dreariest davs I ever saw, waiting tnv Vhanecs a! a liule Arkansas Million for n seal in a coach, wli’-h the telegraph operator assutcu me would start in a couple of {hours for the town of C my next destination. I sat in the opera t r’s little cage, beating a tattoo '•uo my feet, and for the first time in a week fueling utterly jaded and worn out. Tiie door, facing the dense and gloomy forest outside, looked like some yawning aperture to a cavern, the oil lamp inside seem ed naturally to intensify. the. inky blackness ou side. The operatin', a weary, pale-faced man, seemed glad of company, as he no doulr was, a poor old chap, and delayed me with questions about the dreary world to u hich lie was at tacliMUoidy through hisFjinslrumeut and ■Bn occasional newspaper. FI as certainpiljjjihat the’ coach generally made"the trip* in about" an‘liourjand a half or* two’ hours. I suggested the probability that, as the night pruiiiisedjso had, perhaps the coach would lay over. In fact I rather hoped that this might he the case, as I began to hate the idea of being whirled through the dark woods with a fierce wind twisting .the branches together overhead, and smashing the dry limbs and twigs with a great noise. The operator declared that, as it was the mail coach to C , it would undoubt edly go, whatever the prospect; as to company though ho fancied I would have pretty much my own way, as there did not seem to he any passengers besides myself. He walk ed down the pisiform to the station room, and came back with the intel ligence that it was empty. Just at that moment a ruan pushed the door open and looked in; the glimpse I had of him was not, enliv ening. lie was heavily wrapped and his fine very nearly covered by a thick black beard. The operator, busy at bis tabljß ifot -observed llie intruder, and I made no comment except a yawn of general dissatisfac tion. “There’s a house down the road a quarter of a mile whe.te you might stay ail night,” ventured the operator, listlessly turning the pages of the last year’s almanac, not rais in<r Ids eyes at all. Mine was not a suspicious nature, and yet I took no heart in his suggestion, and began to think all manner of things about the man with the almanac. A house down the road. I went to the door and lookhd out. The man who bad looked in on us bad Been sitting on the step formed by the threshold. I was sure it was the same. He got, up hastily and walked down the platform; not glancing bulk. lob served then that I # wore- a Imav. captoe cloak and low bat. The wind blew a hurricane and there was not a star visible; as to road I could see none, nor in fact anything, but about twelve inches of the frosty rails on which the operator’s lamp light fell. I closed the door sud denly, as if I had retired within. I can not say that it was my purpose to watch the man in the cloak, but I closed the door. It was very dark on the platform, except under tiie ( grimy window. The man came back softly, and I scraped a wax taper to light a cigar. The black beard and a pair of glittering eyes were within two feet of me- Was he disconcerted ? He walked on the other side of the platform leis urely. The rain began to fall in big splashing drops, chilling me thorough ly in ten minutes. I went back into the operator’s room; he still idled over the almanac, scarcely looking up as I entered. Soon after there was the distant rumbling of wheels, the j trample of horses, and a few bugle tones came down mournfully in the wind. “ Tiirre’s a coach,” said the opera tor, “and Bill Woodford’s horn. There must he something wrong! This- is not his fun ” L : o(,ts gleamed at the outer end of the platform. The clumsy ol 1 coach rumbled up, the driver in a gray overcoat wooly cap helped to tret the mail ban in the boot, shouting out, “This way, if you please, gentleman, and not an inch y’ time to spare.” “What’s up, Woodford.'” said a deep 1 a=s voice, “ and where s Sam to-nsglit?” HAMILTON, HARRIS 00., 6A„ FRIDAY, DECEMBER 24, 1875. “ He’s gone and give his ankle a j baddish twist, that’s all. Come, look ! alive there 1 ’’ h I buttoned up my co it, felt that I my pistol was all right; I had taken it from the black bag just beLr.'e the ; ! ‘ n ' iv: ‘ l of Hie I clambered in, ook a to; ward seat, and as somebody | swung a lantern backward and f.u --| ward, discerned that, save a very old gentleman, who seemed to be dozing in the back, I was the only passen ger. The driver cracked his whip, and with a ten itic jolting, we stanod at a ; bilious rate of speed. We had, per | haps, accomplished fivo or six miles in j this say, when the rickety old affair gave a sudden lurch, before emping IU a full stop, and the dr , ,-r . are ! - al the window drip*-mg wir, mm ; We’ll have to tumble here for the night, f reckon, gents, for the storm lasi Light lias blown a tree right square in the road, and the leader has got a rock in bis foot and can’t |go on anyway.” Pleasant prospect truly. “ There’s old Job Silvers’ cabin yonder; we can put up with him, I guess, until tnornin’.” ' As the driver bad already begun to unhitch, there was nothing to do but beg hospitality of Mr. Silvers, and the old gentleman and myself scrambled out, the former growling savagely when he found the road an kle deep in a sticky utire, and the rrhi pouring in torrents. “I should like to throttle that villain, and shoot that cursed leader on the spot,” said the old gentleman, making off towards the mi-erable shanty, to the right some thirty yards. After a supper of frizzled bacon, fried eggs and excellent coffee, which was not so bad a supper, eaten before a spaking fil e of birch logs, the host, a tall, sjriin old man, with the facto of ono of Napoleon I’s. soldier-, albeit with a certain look of simplicity im possible to a soldier, conducted me up a rude pair of stairs to a sleeping apartment. The room sloped low in the ceiling on two sides, being just under the roof, and was furnished with two narrow beds and two chairs. 1 took off my coat and waistcoat, and filing myself into bed, putting my pistol and watch under my head. The grim old man excused his pov erty and took away the candle, his cowhide shoes creaking on the stairs as he descended. On second thought : I took my watch from under the pil- 1 low, and placed it between the mat) j tresses on the further side of the bed next to the wall, and soon fell asleep, lulled by the droning voices beneath, and the rain that fell on the shingled roof, a sound I used to love in my boyhood. I was awakened by the creaking of u,o hoard floor under a sleekened foot. The room undoubt edly owned another occupant than myself. Whether legit imate'y so, re in:. 1 to be discovered. What money I had, T carried in tl ■ riubt pocket of my wo •- s, the -mV- t place by all means. Ia so car ried a large, clumsy jack-knife, such as sailors cut tobacco with. I don’t know why I should have remembered the knife, but I did. The walking had ceased, but I fatfried I heard a stifled breathing in the room; this might have been only fancy. However, I gently drew my self to the side next to the wall, be tween which and The bed there was just room enough for a human body and slipped to the floor. I think I smiled at this impulse, but at that moment the creeping recommenced, followed by a smothered oath, and I kimw that someone was softly ap proaching the bed. I bad ceased to smile. I did not admire the idea of 1 a tierce struggle in the and rk, and . most unfortunately my tapers were ; in my waistcoat, which I had thrown I on a chair when retiring. Nevertheless, I had no notion of : being a quiescent party to a murder, | and I began to work my way to. the | foot of the bed, w hich I had sueoeed ied in doing very quietly. I thought | of the knife again, aud opening it j stuck it in my waistband, a thing I would not do again under the same i circumstances. If I had only remov ed the pistol. As the novelist would I s-y, all this occured in much less time than it would take to write it, or to read it either, and only a very tew moments bad elapsed since my first waking. My next move ua~ rather singular. I bad no'iced a light print spread on the bed, a gaudy j piece of calico like our attic w indow curtains at home. I snatched this from the be 1 and sprang to the side | wLfucj nguse j'rweedsd} A man leaned over the bed; he turned with a growl of rage, but be ing lithe as a cat, i enveloped his bind with the calico, rny hands at ■'its throat in an instant. Then began a fearful struggle as wo rolled on the ll ior together. My assailant then dragged me nearer the bed, and it flashed Upon me in an instant that the recovery of the knife was in his mind. I felt now with mv left hand for mine; it was gone. It, had slip ped out during ihe scufll \ and I was thankful that 1 had not been thrown on its sharp point. The burly ruffian had torn the muf fler from his head, and was altogether fixing me in short order. The dotn inant idea m bath of us now was to seize the knife by tlie bed. And my chance was not worth the flip of a penny, yet if anything would be cal culated to lend a man supernatural * i-i, f }•' strennth, it. was conditions like tlifec, and I astonished myself. With asu per-human effort I got on top, and planted my right knee on his breast, and again seizing his throat with ties peration, soon had the satisfaction of feeling bis clutch relax, until lie was as powerless as a child. My strength began to fiil now, and a cold, sickly sweat broke-out of my body at every pore. My would-he murderer lay very still, scaroely a tremor betraying that there was life in him. There was a hurried tramping of feet be low, and a pule light glimmered on the ceiling as the grim old man and two or three others ascended tho stairs, bringing candles. We had aroused the household, although nei ther of us had cried out. As lam not a fighting character, and my cmir age nothing to boast of, 1 think I may safely acknowledge that I showed the white feather when it, was all over, and dropped over from exhaustion and excitement. My man with the black board, who bad followed tne three days with an intent to take my life, believing me to be another person (this I after wards vlearned), was hold in charge until daylight by the coach driver, and tliu host, and at last astonished these worthies by knocking them both down and making his escape. 1 have his knife yet; a keen Italian stiletto, a perfect beauty in temper and carving, and keen as a razor. There are many pleasing adventures in the life of a commercial traveler, or drummer, as they are called, hut tin re are also draw backs. Paper Cab Wiikeeb. —The exper iment is about, to be made of Using paper for the costrnction of wheels f>r drawing-room cors on one of the railways of New York State. The advantages of paper over any other light material are said by the inven tor of the new wheels to be the fol lowing: It is noiseless; it does not swell or shrink with the weather; it affords a stay to the tire and a latteral support, in turning curvs; at the same lime it adapts itself to any trifling ine quality of the inner surface of which wood or iron fail to do; and, finally, it seems to he stronger than any ol her material—many times stronger than any material of the same weight—of which a wheel can possibly be made. In the e wheels the usual steel tire with its “ rail flange ”is used. Upon the axle, as a center, t w o heavey cast iron flanges are fastened parellell to each oti.er at right angles with the axle, and in the plain of the diame ter. Tho inside one has an eight inch radius, the outside one com pletely covering the outer disc, and overlapping the tire onejiulf an inch. Through the compressed paper, from flange to flange, are passed strong bolts of the best iron, secured by nuts “screwed home” firmly, and near enough together to bold the pa per in its place without uunve rsary cutting away of its fibre or weaken ing the flanges. (QrThe ine of conduct chosen by a boy during the five years from fif teen to twenty will, in almost every instance, determine hi* charater for life. As he is then -careful or eare ; less, prudent or imprudent, industri -1 ousor iud rent, truthful or dissimu lating, intelligent or ignorant, tetnper aie or dissolute, so will he be in after years, and it needs no oropliet to easi ; his horoscope or calculate his chaa j CCS. fi£jr Jefferson says: War is an io -1 strument entirely inefficient toward redres-ing wrong and multiplies in [ stead of ideuiuifying losses. AY Vat to Teach our Jioys. Not. to tease hoys or girls younger than themselves. Whe i their play is ever for the day to wa-li their face and hands, brush the hair and spend tho rest of the evening in the house. Not to take the easiest chair in the room and place it directly in front of tho tiro and forget to offer it to tho mothgr when she cornea in to sit down. To treat their mother as politely as if sl e were a strange lady, who did not Spend her life in their ser vice. To be as kind and helpful to their sistera as they are to other boys’ sis ters. Not to grumble or refuse when asked to do some errand t hat must lie done, and which will otherwise take the time of someone who has more to do than themselves. To make their friends among good boys. To take pride in having their mothers and sisters for their host friends. To try and find amusements for the evening which all tho family can join it) large and small. To lake pride in being a gentleman at, home. To cultivate a cheerful temper. To learn to sew on their own but tons. If thov do anything, to take their mothers into confidence, and above all never lie about anything they have done. To make up their minds not, to learn to smoko, to chew, or to drink, remembering that those things can not bo unlearned, and that they tiro terrible drawbacks to good men and necessities to bad ones. To remember that there was nover a vagabond without these habits. To learn to have their money and invest it from the first |enny they earn, and they arc sure to be rich men. To observe all thoe rules and you are sure to he a gentleman. Tribute to a Mothkh. —Childrc >n look in those eyes, listen t,o that, dear voice notice the feeling of even a sin gle touch that is bestowed upon you by that gentle hand! Mako much of it, while yet you have that most precious of all good gilts, a loving mot her. Read the unfathomable 'ovu of those eyes; tho kind anxiety of that tone and look, however slight, your pain. In after life you may have friends, fond, dear, kind friends; but never will you have again the in expressible love and gentleness lav ished upon you which none hut a mother bestows. Often do I sigh in my struggle with the hard, for the sweet deep security I felt when, of an evening, nestling in her bosom, I listened to some quiet tale,, suitable to my age, road in her tender aud untiring voice. Never can I forget her sweet glances cast upon me when I appeared asleep, never her kiss of peace at night. Years have passed away since we laid her beside my father in the old church-yard; yet still her voice whispers from the grave, and her eye watches over me ail visit spots long sine • hallowed to the memory of my mother.— Lord Macauley. ttay Idleness is demoralizing to any community, nnd the trouble i our young men are unwilling to com mence on a farm in a small way and work themselves tip on a larger scale of farming. Strumming on a guitar or singing love ditties under a pretty girl’s window at midnight may do well if the srrenader has been stead ily at work during the day, but if the sun rises and sets upon the idler, it seems that any girl of any sense would rather sleep Roundly than be awakened by a man with an oper atic voice and an empty pocket-book. S'-v?" iintend-. >m paid last year for the support of her war system, two thousand millions of dollars. Christians—all who profess and call themselves by that name—paid Nr mi-sions in the same time, live mil lions of dollars. Young ladies who are accus tomed to read the newspapers are al ways observed to possess winning ways, nio“t amiable dispositions, in variably make good wivos, aud al ways select good husbands. l&cU Hanging is brisk, but with a filling tendency. I ’tU People wtio sell coal dr busi ue >s on a “large scale,” A Cluu That Held a Regiment at Bay. Mr. Win. TANARUS?. Winans has in his noasossion a remarkable gun, and one that has an unwritten mid partly art unknown history more remarkable than tho weapon itsc'f. As to where it was made or by win? train of eir cnmslances its death dealing crack became a sound of terror along the Tennessee and Cumberland rivei-R during the earlier years of the late war, we shall not pretend to say. The very sound of tho gun became known and familiar, and an ominous one along infantry skirmish lines, and among the sharpshoots. Near the time of tho battle of Shiloh some infantry had been employed in skir mish or roqonnoitoring duty in the deep tangled woods. Crack, bang, boom roared at intervals the obi gun in the distance, at every discharge laying a soldier stiff and stark in death with unerring accnraov. Shift their podti ut as they might, the gun would bang away, and with a hiss and a thud there would Hitt one sol dier less. The direction of the firing was ascertained, and the entire regi ment was ordered to charge toward it without knowing where or what it was Ou they went, losing a man at every pace. N ithing was t accom plished, and the parly teturned, leav ing the murderous gun cracking away as they retreated. Shortly afYerwnd tho old firelock was heard again with her murderous music. It was re solved at all buzzards to find and cap ture the infernal machine. After per sistent efforts a tall, raw-boned, griz zle bearded, largo-sized Texas ranger was discovered in tho foliage of a large tree among the branches of which he was picking off his t -oa as well as he had picked off hundreds before. Brought to bay, 1 e contin ued to lo id are! shoot with deadly aim till brought down, and the fa tuous gun was captured. I" is a gun of immense calibre, lieing near eight feet long, with a smooth bore, sin gle barrel, large enough to admit a small walnut. —Dowling Green (Ay.) m l‘antcigrap/i. Hurtful Hicadinu. —A bud book, magazine or newspaper is as danger ous to your child as a vicious com panion, and will ns surely corrupt his morals and lead him away from the paths of safety. Every parent should set this thought dearly before his mind an 1 ponder it well. Look to what your children read, and espe cially to tho kind of paper that gels into their hands, for there nrG now published scores of weekly papers, with attractive and sensuous illustra tions, that are as hurlful to young ami innocent souls as poison to a healthful body. Many of thene papers Irt,vo attained largo circulations, and sowing broadcast the seeds of * n and and crime. Trenching on t he very borders of indecency, they corrupt the morals, taint the imagi nation and allure the week and un guarded from tho paths of innocence, the danger to young persons from this cause was never so great as at this time, and every father and mother should be on guard against an enemy that is sure to meet their child. Look to it then that your children are kept free-as possible from this taint. Never bring into your bouse a paper or periodical that is not strictly pure. Wn at is iuk Sun? — Prof. Ru dolph, in a lengthy paper on tho sun says: A mol ton or white hot mass, 856,000 miles in diameter equaling in hulk 1,860,000 worlds like our own, having a surrounding ocean of gas on fire 50,000 miles deep, tongues of dime darting upward moro than 50,000 miles, volomic forces that hurl into the solar atmosphere lumi nous matter to the height of 160,000 miles drawing to itself all the words belonging to our family of planets, and h dding them all in 'heir proper places aitrti tng with such superior force ,; e mi ous of solid and stray mas-o that .ire wandering in the faihi mlcss abyss that they rush help lessly toward him and tall into his fiery embrace. And thus he cohtin ues his sublime and resistless march through his mighty orbit, having a period of moie than 18,000,000 of years. Sga- A Detroit woman could think of but twenty-nine different ingredi ents to put into a mince pie, and she wept at the idea of losing her powers of memory $2.00 A YEAR. WIT and HUHOR. Queen of ’Arts—female graduate* At dinner a fowl is very good {jure. Notes of admiration—love letters. The first, thing in a boot is the last* Sweetness and light—a love match. The coming woman—Annie Yor— sary. A high-toned young man—a tenor singer. A gkl of in-liroad usefulness—Sally ratus. , , , Cheap drapery—the curtains of tho night. Academy of design—a young la dies’ hoarding school. Moderat • thine expenses; bo nofc die; keep thy oounsel. Speaking of the Isreafites, were they not to he mama born? If rocks ever bled, they wonlil bleed quartz. Tito tnan who would like to see you—tho blind man. Always getting things down Ho a fine point—the needle maker. When may bread be said to b% in h Jute 1 ? W.iutt it has a little In dian in it. A good temperance work—remov ing the bars at the mouth of thb Mis sissippi. “ llail, gentle Spring I” says Thomp son, and gentle spring hailed, and snowed too. Why cannot a tf uqteratice man kiss a Jewess? lie bus sworn mot to taste jew-lips. * ! / Dubious weather—w’ethor or no. A Dubuque youngster, learning that tannin could boused to make the skin so bard and tough in expos-: id places that chaffing and blistering would not occur, acted accordingly; and now any amount of the parental hand and shingle has no terrors for him. Tho following epitaph, copied from a Pennsylvania tombstone, has been sent to the Historical society of that Slate: "Here lies the bodie of Mar garet Fay, her would if her could, but her couldn’t stay; her had bad legs and a haddish cough, it were her legs as carried her ofT.” “ Ma,” said a small boy approach ing his mother, and exhibiting unmis tablc symptoms of a severe pain in the stomach, “ do green apples grow in heaven?” A Mr. Smith went into business with a German. After being in bus iness for about four years, they broke. A biend meeting the German asked him how it was. “You see, my friend Schmidt and I go iltto one bus iness. lie had five thousand dollars and I had experience, which I puts against his money. Vel, we go in one, two four years, and wo close up, when I had tho five thousand dollars aud my friend Schmidt had the ex patience.” A white minister at a colored wed ding said, “ On such occasions as this it is customaiy to kiss the bride, but in tniß case wo will omit it.” To this unclerical remark the indigns&fc bridegroom very pertinently replied: “On such occasions it is customary to give the minister ten dollars, but in this case we will omit it." A witty old judge who had spent un evening with a young lawyer whose office was on the seoond story, on taking his departure stumbled on the stairs and fell to the bottom. The lawyer hearing the noise rushed out and seeing the judge lying on his back at the bottom of the stairs, has tened down nnd with great anxiety asked, “Is your honor hurt ? ” “No, but my legs are.” “My native city has treated me badly,” said a drunken vagabond, “ but I love her still." “ Probably,” replied a gentleman, " her still is all that you do love.” Japanese officials commit anicide when found guilty of theft or embez zlement. American officials retire to their farms and receive the congratu lations of friends. The Shelbyville (Ky.) Republican says that the worst case of seffisboesw t hat it has been permitted to present to tho public, emanated from a youth who complained because bis mother put a bigger mustard plaster on kia younger brother than she did <. him after they had been eating melon*! and hard apples. A woman is composed of two hun dred and forty-nine bones, and just sixty-nine muscles, aud three hundred I and sixty-nine pins.