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BUDGET OF FUN. HUMOROUS SKETCHES FKQ3I VARIOUS SOURCES. Spring—Ingratitude—An Object Wes¬ son — Rea I Courage — Equally Pleasant to Contemplate—A Shrewd Servant, Etc., Etc. Behold! the days of spring are here, All nature sings in joyful tune. The birdlets warble sweet and clear, And the small boy in the next yard amuses himself by artaching his sister’s pet doll to a full-grown, able-bodied toy bal¬ loon. The leaves are pressed by fairies feet. And the morbid feline proceeds to rehears? her summer serenade all through the dew-steeped night. The sighiug youth writes sonnets to bis girl, The tailor maid now dreams of gowns and flats, The lilies sweet their banners white unfurl, And the hoarse young man with the large life and flabby countenance makes ™X’’ by l0Ud ' y blWlins ‘ ' Sha,i The lovers stroll the shaded Janes along, The genial tramp from each keg drains the' The grass now sprouteth upward green and And strong. carefully taking of all the bv note above facts you may. without resource to fickle almanacs, spring feel reasonably sure that gentle is here. —New York Sun. INGRATITUDE. Judge—“Prisoner at the bar, have you anything to say before sentence is passed? Prisoner—“Yes, your honor. Will you please date my sentence from the time that that lunk-hended, long-winded, son of a gun of a lawyer of mine started to talk?”— Life. ' REAL COURAGE. Jones and his friends were discussing ° the latest lion accident. “Why, I ve been in the cage myself a dozen times," boasted that inveterate joker. “And yon weren't afraid?” “Of course not; the lions had been taken out. ’’— Judge. AN OBJECT LESSON. Mrs. Brown- “Johnnie broke a pane of-glass, but as he told me about it at once, l eave him an apple.” Mrs. Cobwigger— -That will teach him a great lesson.” Mrs. Brown—“I'm afraid not. As soon as he had eaten the apple he wen! * and nroke another window.'’—- Enoch. A SHREWD SERVANT. Young Cavalier (to his man servant)— “John, what has become of the letter that was on this table?” John—*‘1 put it in the postoffice, sir.” “But it wasn’t addressed.” “I know it, sir; but l thought you didn’t want anybody to know whom you was writing to, sir.”— Teeis Siftings. EQUALLY PLEASANT TO CONTEMPLATE. “Father,’’said Mr. Skinnphlint’s eldest son, with blood in his eyes, “that horse of ours is a treacherous beast. He’ll be the death of me some time, or I’ll be the death of him.” “Then I’ll sell him,” replied Mr. Skinnphlint, gloomily, “A funeral would east me every blamed cent the animal is worth.”— Chicago Tribune. THEN IIE WENT. He (at 11:30)—“A friend of mine paid me a high compliment to-day.” She—“Indeed.” lie- l 4 5es; he said there was a good deal of vim and go in my composition.” She (looking at the clock)—“There may be a good deal of truth in the first part of his statement, but—what, must you go so early, Air. Green ?”—Yank x Blade. AT THE OFFICERS’ MESS. Seuior Lieutenant (to new waiter, pro- moted from the ranks)—“When you re- move the plates always ask each gentle- man if he desires a second help of soup.” Next day. Waiter (changing the plates)—“Will the Herr Lieutenant take any mere soup?” Lieutenant—‘ ‘ Yes." Waiter—“There isn’t any left."_ Fliegendc Blaetter. A HEAVEN ON EARTH. Mrs. Gushine—“Oh, I am so charmed with your home, Mrs. Quiverful. Such a beautiful house, and such pleasant sur roundings! and then such daughters, too. I hope the young ladies realize that their home is a perfect paradise.” Uncle Joe (a mean old thing)—“Oh, they live up to it, Mrs. Gushing. I as¬ sure you there is no marrying or giving m marriage here.”— Lite. TO TEST HIS ENTHUSIASM. Ernest Peachblow (to the new boarder from Chicago)—“Ah, Miss Lafitc, the study of the occult sciences interests me greatly. I love to explore with the keen eyes of knowledge all the dark depths of the mysterious, to delve into the regions of the unknown, to fathom, as we mav say, the unfathomable.” Miss Lafitc—“May I help you to some of the hash, 3!r. Peachblow?”— Puck. A LONG SEARCH UNREWARDED. 44W Why , old ,, fellow , „ what , s the . matter? , \ou look as though you hadn t been getting any sleep. “Well, I haven't, in a way. My wife lias always made it a rule to go through my pockets, so last night I thought I’d go through hers, to see how she liked it. 1 started searching for it as soon as she was asleep, spent almost all night look¬ ing for it, and couldn’t find it after all.” —Fliegendc Bio titer. DIFFERENT FROM HER TREATMENT, i • Bobby (looking- out of the window) — “What’s the matter with that horse, mamma?” I Mother—“The horse is balky, Bobby; he won’t obey liis driver.” Bobby—‘•Well, what’s the man par¬ ting him for?” Mother—“He is coaxing him." a,n t t,ie wa v you treat me wnen I m - balky. ’—ietudon Tid-Bits. HE GREW WEARY. Young Writer—“Have you read mv article in the current number of the Beery Other .Monthly Reciew, .Miss Pene- lope. , Miss Penelope—“No; that pleasure is still in store for me. I heard papa say, though, that he had read it.” Young Writer—“Did lie not think that I treated my subject in a very ex- kuustive manner, Mias Penelope—‘ Yes, J believe he did say something about being tired.” LOTS OF MILLIONS. An insurance agent who has an office o:i Earned street sat alone iu the office the other day when a fairly well dressed stranger entered, passed the time of day, said: “I called to inquire if vou could lend me 115?” “Why, you are a stranger to me,” was the reply, “Certainly, but I ask it as a stranger, Will you lend me five?” I i But you are not recommended.” “Just so, and neither have I any security to offer. Will vou or will vou not?” “I will not!” “You refuse?” “Ido.” “ Very well, sir. I happen to be the possessor of $4,000,000 in stocks, bonds- and cash. I have no relative to leave it to. I am trying human nature to find a man who dares risk $5 on a principle. When I find him I make my will in his favor. You have lost. Good day, sir.” —Detroit Free Press. HIS TEST. He rang the door hell with the air of a man who was in quest of information, and when the door was opened by a lady with an angry light shooting from each eye, and her brow loaded with a thunder cloud, he politely took off his hat, and said: “Madam, pray excuse me, if I detain you a moment.” “What is it ?" she snapped. t t 1 have been told,” he calmly began, ‘by every lady I have called on, that the most intelligent and accomplished lady in Atlanta lives at this number, and as the firm I represent positively forbids me from selling to any but the most refined and highly cultured, I will beg you to tell me whether or not I have been cor¬ rectly informed, before proceeding further.” The stern look in the lady's face had gradually softened as he spoke,the angry by light in her eyes was driven away a pleasant glance,and when he had finished, she smiled sweetly and asked: “What have you for sale?” The book agent swiftly undid his pack, and said: “Madam, I have here the most com¬ plete edition of--” and he sold her a copy iu five seconds. —Atlantic Constitu- lion. The Trade of the Amazon. The commerce of the Amazon River is carried on under the Brazilian flag. Foreigners are not allowed by law to own steamers or sailing vessels employed in inland navigation; hence it is necessary * or capitalists who control the carrying trade of the river to assign their interest to Brazilians. “There are forty steamers owned by an English line, which re- reives a large mail subsidy from the Brazilian Government for plying between main various ports and villages on the tributaries; and in return for this financial support it is well satisfied to fly the national flag. Auother company has eight steamers under similar conditions, and there are as m:w > 48 a doM “ m f °» th “ ri f er its tributaries . which sad under the Brazilian flag. These sixty steamers are gradually opening up the Amazon valley to commerce. Only the smaller vessels are now running beyond Maouos, at the junction of the Negro, but next year the largest English vessels will make regular trips to Yquitas, a distance of 3750 miles from the coast. This river trade is almost completely in the hands of the Portu¬ guese merchants and the mercantile houses represented at Para, a city of 50,009 in¬ habitants. — Bradstreet's. Legal Descent of Properly. Where a husband and wife arc lost at sea, the law always assumes that he, being the stronger, survived her by some minutes or hours. On this opposition he inherits her property (during the few moments that he survives her), and on his death his relatives inherit it from followed up in the French courts within the last tea years, it was found that the wife out- , ire(1 her husband, and the practice oi , he bw had (l) ^ _ erer5od> am: e.nt news. CONDENSED FROM THE TELE GRAPH AND CABLE. THINGS THAT HAPPEN FROM DAT TO DAT THROUGHOUT THE WORLD, CULLED FROM VARIOUS SOURCES. The striking carpenters of Chicago arc becohiing riotous. The gas titters of Chicago have decided to strike on next Monday. I he society of engineers Tuesday gave a grand fete at Brussels on in honor of Stanley. In t he Austrian reichsrath, no Monday, notice was given of 1,490 speeches to be made during the budget debate. ( harles E. Kincaid, charged with the murder ol ex - Represen ta t i ve Taulbee in W ashington, was, on Monday, admitted to bail in the sum of $20,000”. Malignant diphtheria is epidemic in the village of Vinning, Minn. Out of a population of 150 persons, there has been twenty deaths since the 1st of April. In the court of general sessions at New Nork. r on Tuesday, Daniel Finnigan eon- lessed to a burglary for which his brother, Henry Finnigan, was tried and convicted last. week. Ilis reported from Fort Worth that ping New Orleans will probably be the ship- point for the company that propose to ship 150.000 beeves annually to Europe and elsewhere. In the Brazilian cabinet, General Pers- coto General assumes the war portfolio becomes in the place min¬ ot Constant, who ister of the new department of education, posts and telegraphs. States Attorney Longcnecker has dis¬ missed the case against Woodruff, the Cronin suspect, at Chicago, on the ground that the State believes Woodruff’s confes¬ sion is a fabrication. In court in general term, at Washing¬ ton, T). C., on Monday, a decision was announced in the held celebrated pan-electric of vio¬ ease. The court the charge lation of agreement had not been sus- lained. interior A strong Swedish Africa expedition be started into from the of is to Loudon in May, under the leadership of Johann Zachrisscn. It will establish sta¬ tions along its route, to aid in suppress¬ ing the slave trade. A strike was inaugurated at John P. Squire & Co.’s Cambridge, pork packing establish¬ ment, in East Mass,, Satur¬ day morning. Between TOO and 800, all but a few of the employes, including teamsters, are out, and the • factory is practically shut down. The trustees of the American Cotton Seed Oil trust at New York, on Tuesday, formally retired from control of the com¬ pany, and turned its officers and property over to its successor, the Amevicau Cotton Oil company, which is incorporated un- dor the laws of New Jersey. The convention of working girls ad¬ journed their three days’ session in New York on Monday, after formulating plans for the extension of working girls’ clubs. A plan is also under discussion, at a sup¬ plementary session, for the establishment of a newspaper to be known as the organ of the working girls’ association. A Pittsburg, railroad Pa., dispatch situation of has Tuesday says: The never been more gloomy than at present. The Brotherhood of Railroad Trainmen has taken up the cause of the switchmen. The Brotherhood of Trainmen resolved to cling to the switchmen in their de¬ mands, and presented grievances of their own to be adjusted. The Inman line steamship “City of Boston” unloaded a part of her cargo at her dock at New York, Monday morning, without having entered the custom house. In consequence the custom house author¬ ities stopped the work of unloading and seized the vessel. Notice was sent the Inman line officials calling for an expla- nation. In default of this, confiscation is threatened. FIRING ON THE AGENTS. ILLICIT DISTILLERS IN NORTH CAROLINA SHOOT AT THE REVENUE MEN. Three weeks ago the internal revenue agent at Statesville, N. C., was informed by a Wilkes county man named Lem Wallace that there were five illicit distil¬ leries within a radius two miles in Wilkes near the Iredell line. Wallace volunteered to guide the officer to them. The agent made an appointment with him to meet him four nights ago, and accompanied by Deputy Collector Harwell, left States¬ ville for the meeting point. The guide failed to show up, and the agent and deputy rode on toward Wilkes. They met Deputies Pinnex and Mas- tin and two storekeepers. The party were riding along the road with woods on one side. Eight shots w ere fired at them in quick succession by men in ambush. The agent’s horse reared and fell back cn him. Keeping the horses between them and the woods the officers got away. This was about 2 o'clock in the morning. The igent's horse was struck in the jaw with i rifle bali and the agent got a slug through the brim of his hat. Harwell’s horse got a load of buckshot in his ihoulder. The agent was badly bruised by the falling of his horse on him, but was not seriously hurt. This is the first occurrence of the kind in that section. HE FORGOT UIMSELF. Miss Hauteur—How beautiful her high notes are. Bingley—Yes,but you should have seen the ln-autiful high note I had to give when I borrowed the money for our tickets. Oh. ah, excuse me—yes, they arc beautiful.—(Lawrence American. WRIGHT. W. F' ALLKN. F. II. WRIGHT & ALLEN, --DEALERS IN- Dry Goods, Groceries, Hats, Shoes, HARDWARE AND SUPPLIES. We can furnish you with High Grade Fertilizers, the best on the market. Try them. Best quality Corn, Hay, Oats, Bran. Our stock of Ladies’ Goods is complete, and we extend a cordial invitation to call and inspect same. You will be pleused with what we have to show you. ± CRAWFORD SHERIFF'S SALES. O EORGIA— Crawford County. —Will U^be he sold town before of Knoxville, the court Ga., house withiu door the m iegal hours of sale on the first Tuesday in April next, the following described property, to-wit: Lot of land No. 77, in the Seventh District of said couuty. con¬ taining 2J2 1-2 acres, more or less, levied on under a fi. fa. i-sued from the Justice Court of the 529th district, G. M., said county, in favor of Johu A. Houser, vs. B. F. Lee. 8. M. L ‘e an I E. 8. Lee, as the property of said defendant found in tueir possession. Levy made by the con¬ stable of said district and turned over to me for sale. Terms, cash. Witness my hand officially, this February 26th, 1890. B. A. HARTLEY, Feb. 23th, ’90. Sheriff. G EORGI A— Crawford County. —W. J. McGee, Administrator de bonis non of David McGee, dec ased,lias applied such me for letters dismissory, and letters will be granted applicant on the first Monday in April next, unless good objections are filed. Witness my hand officially, this Januarv 1st 1890. O. P. WEIGHT, Ordinary. Jan. 1st 3rn. G EURGIA— Crawford County.- Ed¬ ward Mi chell has applied to me lot of personalty and valuation homestead. I will pass on same on the first Monday in March next. Witmss my hand officially, this Jan. 31st, 1890. O. P. WRIGHT, Ordinary. G EORGIA— Crawford Count y.— James A. Moore and John 1. Cham- piou, executors of James Roberts, de¬ ceased, have applied lo me for letters of dismission from their executorship. filed, will Un¬ less good objections aie I grant them letters dismissory on the liist Monday in June, 1890. Witness my bund officially this the 4th day of Much, 1890. O. V. WR1GIIT, Ordinury. Q E( )RGI A— Crawford Count y.— W. K. Eubanks Executor of Eligah Eubanks, deceased, has in due form ap¬ plied to me for letters of dismission from his executorship. Unless good objec¬ said tions thereto are filed, I will dismissory grant to W. K. Eubanks such letters on the 1st Monday in June, 1890. Witness my hand officially. P. WRIGHT, O. Ordinary. Ij EO RGIA— Cr aw ford Coun ty. — W . M. Taylor, administrator of estate of Rufus Carter, deceased, has administration applied for letters dismissory from the of said estate, and such letters will be granted on the first Monday in May next, unless good objections are filed. Witness my hand officially, *0. this January 27th, 1890. P. WRIGHT, jan 31-13 Ordinary*. pEOUGlA —Crawford County. —A. t|C. Sanders and James ofThos. M. J. Sanders, Sanders, executors of the will deceased, have applied to me for letters dismissory from their executorship; therefore all persons concerned are here¬ by required to show cause, if any they have, on the first Monday in May next, why such letters should not be granted. Witness my baud officially. January 27th, 1890. O. P. WRIGHT, Jan. 81—13t Ordinary. P EORGIA— Crawfor d County. — II. U M. Burnett, administrator on estate of Mrs. Martha Stem bridge, deceased, has applied to me for letters of dismis¬ sion from the administration of said es¬ tate, and same will be granted on good the first Monday in July next, unless ol jeetions are filed. Witness my hand officially this April 1st. O. P. 1890. WRIGHT. Ordinary. O EORGI A —Crawford County. —W. 13 J. Slocumb. as administrator of the estate of S. P. Williamson, deceased, has applied for letters of dismission from said trust. This is therefore to cite all peraons concerned to show cause, if any they have, within the time should prescribed by law why said application not be granted. hand officially this, tht Witness my 31st day of March. 1890. O. P. WRIGHT. Ordinary. PROFESSIONAL CARDS. R. D. Smith. W. P. Blasihgame, SMITH & BLASINGAME, ATTORNEYS AT LAW, Knoxville, Ca. Prompt and faithful attention given to. all business entrusted to their care. MOSEY CHEAP AND EASY. (O) If you want CHEAP ANI) QUICK 3IOXEY, on easy and liberal terms, you can get it by calling on W. P. BLASINGAME, Attorney a? Law, Knoxville, Ga. DR.W.F. BLASINGAME DENTIST, Knoxville, - - Georgia. I respectfully tender my services in the Practice of Dentistry to the citizens of Knoxville and effort surrounding country, and will spare no work and to perfect secure satisfaction. my patrons com petent S-®’*Charges Reasonable. KNOXVILLE HIGH SCHOOL SPRING TERM. . .January 13 o ......I une 27 FALL TERM. Opens.. September * ... 1. Closes.. ... December 19. Rate of tuition for All Classes. $2 pei month. A jrro rata alio wain e will be made for Public Fund. Each pupil will be taught by the most modern methods. hei I cordially solicit your patronage. Fwr- • information will be eheerfuHv fur¬ nished by C. C. POWER: Principal. THE HARRIS HOUSE, KNOXVILLE, GEORGIA. Always open to public patronage. We try to please our guests. Comfortable Room aud good Fare. Free hack to and from Depot. Z f T. KARRIS, Proprietor. NOTICE. I will be at the following places for re¬ - iving tax returns for the present year, _ T’ t a * r ‘ ’ c* iru on Monday. T S? > Cl 4 i i € “ “ Tuesday. c t it i i i i Wednesday. it it “ Thursday. Webb’s Oi 44 “ “ Wednesdav. Hammocks 1st “ “ May Thursday. Beasley’s 3d 44 4 4 Friday. Knoxville 10th “ “ 4 4 Saturdav. R. H. KNIGHT, Tax Receiver. March 19th. 1890. tf A SIMPLE RATIFICATION. “Well, papa has ratified our engage* ment, Josephus, dear.” “Good! But what did he say? “Hesimply said ‘Rats!’”—(Puck.