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“Miscellaneous. The Irascibility of a Poet . We copy the annexed article from the N. Y. Spectator. It partakes largely of the spirit of M’Donald Clarke. He h a strange genius, hut notwithstanding all his fol lies, possesses many excel lent qualifications both of head and heart. Album , Original Repartee. —A cer tain poet, who has written tome of the best Stanzas , and some ol the ivorst lines of any American bard; and who for some particular eccentricities, (hut which he has at length thrown aside,) has been reput ed mad , being some time since, In the Assembly Hoorn, at the City Hotel, was interrupted in his ‘dreams of fiction* by a stranger, who thus accosted him: ‘la your name C e?’ C——e is my name. 1 ‘I have come a great dis tance, sir, for the express pur pose of seeing you.* ‘lndeed! And do you consid er yourself amply remunerated for the fatigue of along journ ey, by a view of my delectable person?’ ‘Yes—you are a strange looking creature. I have heard much of you. Some people say you are mad! and I have heard a number of ladies assert that if you paid proper atten tion to your dress, you would be a very pretty man.* A pretty man! Now, by Heavens, sir, 1 consider that one of the most rascally com w pliments they could have paid me. A pretty man, sir, (like yourself, for instance,) is, in my opinion, one of the most contemptible objects that ever came from the manufactory of Heaven!* ‘Why so, sir?* •Because, sir, the epithet im plies the absence of all that is manly—-They might as well apply the term to the Ocean in a storm, an eruption of Mt. JE ua, or the falls of Niagara.’ ‘Well you are really a; strange fellow; and in mv o m pinion, a greater knave than fool.* ‘Do you think so, sir? 1 re all v wish that I could recipro cate the compliment. But I am certain that no trait In your character will hear anv com panion with your sillvness, Which like \aron‘s rod nr Iha roah k s lean kine, swallows up all the rest* ‘Y>u are severe.* •You say that you have come a great distance for the ex press tmrpnse of seeing me as you would go to see a Bear, an Elephant, or a Hottentot Ve nus?* ‘Yes. * ‘Now sir comply with the terms; fifty cents a sight.* ‘lndeed! Well, there.* ( Gives him the money.) ‘Stay sir, take back 25 cents —children half price!’ ‘Again! Why you show no mercy to one who is anxious to serve you.* ‘To serve me? Then unite your fortunes with mine. Ev ery wild beast that is exhibit ed in this city, is accompanied with a monkey.’ The stranger finding the po et ‘to much for him,’ as the pugilists say, and perceiving that he was no more deficient in feeling than in wit and tal ents, begged his pardon foi having so rudely intruded up on his meditations, and was about retiring, when the poet returned the rc9t of his money, and taking him by the hand, assured him, that as impudence and ignorance are always unit ed, he could very safely par don his presumption. THE OLD MAID'S DIARY. At the age of fifteen she is anxious for coming out, anti the attention of the men. At 16, begins to have some idea of the tender passion; 17, talks of love in a cottage, and disin terested affection; 18, fancies herself in love with some hand some man who lias flattered her; 19, is a little more diffi cult, in consequence of being noticed: 20, commences fash ionable and dashes; 21, still more confident in her own at tractions, and expect a brilliant establishment; 22, refuses a good offer, because he is not a man of fashion; 23, flirts with every young man she meets; 24, wonders she is not marri ed; 25, rather more circum spect in her conduct; 26, be gins to think a large fortune not quite so indispensible; 27- prefers the company of ra tional men to flirting; 28, wish es to be married in a quiet way I with a comfortable income; 29, almost despairs of entering the married state: 30, rather fear ful of being called an old maid; 81 an additional love of dress; 82, professes to dislike balls, finding it difficult to get good partners; 33, wonders how men can leave the society of sensible women, to flirt with chits; 34 affects good humour in her conversation with men: 85, jealous of the praises of women; 86 quarrels with her friend, who is lately married; 87- thinks herself slighted in society; 38, likes to talk of her acquaintances who are married unfortunately, and finds consolation in their mis fortunes; 89, ill nature increas es; 40, very meddling and offi cious.— N: B—A growing pen chant; 41, if rich, as a deinier resort, makes love to a young man without fortune; 42, not succeeding rails against the sex; 43, partiality for cards and scandal commences; 44, se vere against the manners of the age; 45, strong prediction for a Methodist parson; 46, enraged at his desertion; 47, becomes desponding and takes snuff; 48, turns all her sensibil ity to cats and dogs; adopts a dependent relation to attend on her feline and canine nursery; 50, becomes disgusted With the world, and vents all her ill humour on her unfortunate re lation!!! The Scotch are very in quisitive people. Their vari ous questions are deemed ob trusive, and are carried to a great length. Two gentlemen fell in together, both travellers on horseback and strangers to each other, when the follow ing conversation took place: ‘Raw evening, sir,* rather ob served the one, with an Aber deen accent ‘You will likely be a stranger in these parts,’ con tinued the Aberdeman: ‘lf I can laconically replied the oth er, looking neither to the right hand not to the left. ‘Per haps like myself, you may he going to Baud?’ ‘Perhaps,* re sponded the other, yawning. In that case, perhaps, you will ‘ put up at Cullen?’ ‘I may, or I may not,’ answered his com panion-—‘Pardon me in the liberty of the question, sir, may I ask if you are a bacheler?’ 1 ‘No,’ Oh! married, I beg your : pardon, I may have uninten -1 tionally touched upon a painful ’ subject; your black dress ought to have checked my inquiries; I beg your pardon sir—a wid ower?’ No, no, no.’ Neither a bacheler, nor a married man, nor widower; in Heaven‘s name, sir, then, what, can you be?’—‘A divorced man, and be and and to you, since you must know!’exclaimed the stranger, clapping spurs to his horse, and dashing out of sight in an instant. Reasons for Emigrating. —A Scotch gentleman, in the warmth of natural veneration, was praising Scotland for the cheapness of provisions; a ’ salmon might he bought for • saxpance, and a dozen maeker al for twapence—And pray Sir asked one of his listeners, how come you to leave so cheap a country? In gude truth mon, replied the Scotchman, although the fish is plentiful e nough saxpences and tvva pences are unco scarce. AGRICULTURE, In order to disseminate extensively the many advantages whiih must flow from the developemeot of new resources and valuable improvements in the Agri cultural World, it is reasonable to pre sume, that a proper medium for the accu mulation and distribution of practical knowledge, must prove of the first impor ance. A periodical publication, devotetd to these purposes, if conducted with spir it and industry, cannot prove otherwise than eminently useful. Under these impres.-ions, the publishers have determined on oflciing to the Agri cultural community, the FARMERS MAGAZIXE, as a repository of useful information’ satisfied that they cannot render to their ountry a more valuable service, or betterc ontnbute to its permanent prosperity,c han in subserving, as they hope to do, itst agricultural interests. The leading feature of this publication will besustained by our own ample resour ces, united to the promised contributions of several Agricultural Societies, and the assistance of distinguished agricultu rists in this and other States. The Literary and Scientific Depart ment will be conducted by a gentleman, heretofore editor of a popular literary journal. In furtherance of their views, the pub lishers solicit original contributions on Agriculture, Horticulture, Rural and Domestic Economy, &c. and the co-oper ation of agriculturists and the friends of agriculture throughout the country, to whom is respectfully submitted the foi lowing, PROPOSALS FOR PUBLISinXG In the City of FhiLdelphia Fa. THE FARMERS’ PRACTICAL MAGAZINE/ Or, Agricultural and Lit ei ary Caxele. The FARMERS MAGAZINE is de signed to contain information drawn from authentic sources, relative to the improvement and management of remark able Farms; sources of manure; number and kind of stock: Farming Utensils/ Laborers, Dairies, kc. Agricultural Im provements, Drawings and Descriptions of useful inven'ions; Critical Notices and Reviews of such publications as may tend to the interests of the Husbandman: Improvments in the Breed cf Domestic Animals Accounts ol suth Foreign and Domestic ‘Frees, Shrub*. Vines, Plants, Seeds, and Grains, as are considered ne cessary or useful for Subsistence, Com fort or Ornament, with information rel ative to their treatment, growth, requisite kind of Soil, and, in short, w hatever may tend to increase tile product ot the soil and advance the iural economy of the country. Insertion will always be given to such Reports, Addresses, and Papers as may be communicated for publication by the several Agricultural Societies of this and other States. A Land Register will contain, as far as practicable, a list of Farms which are uovv, or may hereafter be for sale, ac count of their size, situation, quality, and such other particulars as may be deemed useful. Space will be afforded for the solid ard sterling beauties of Literature, the useful Arts and Sciences, Chemistry, Natural History and Philosophy, Biography, and Travels, State of the Markets in the prin cipal Seaports, &c. &c. >C7*TERMS —The Farmers’ Maga zine will be published semi-monthly; the price is three t dollars per annum, payable either at the time cf subscribing, or on receipt of the first number. That form and size has been adopted, which is deemed most convenient for binding, while the quality of paper, the beauty of the type, (entirely new,) and the general execution of the work, will be such, as it is hoped, will reflect credit on the pub lishers, and gatify its patrons. Address (post paid) THOMAS C. CLARK, Agent for the Proprietors, No. 48, Makel-gtreet, Philadelphia* OSrEditors copying the above, may contribute to the interests of an invalua ble science, and will receive a copy of the wt>*k. THE CABIXET Is published every Saturday , by P. L. ROBIXSOX , JFarrenton. Geo. at three dollars per annum , u hich may he discharged by two dollars and fifty cents if paid within sixty days of the time of subscribing.