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Miscellaneous. ’ ■ I I I- 11l ■ ■! ■ Amendments and Criticism. A journeyman hatter, a com panion of Dr. F. on commenc ing business for himself, was anxious to get a handsome 6iu;.inoaid, with a proper in scription: This he composer! himself as follows—“ John Thompson, hatter , makes and sells hits Jar ready money” with the figure of a hat sub joined. But he thought he would submit it to hi* friends for their amendment. The first he showed it to, thought the word hatter tautologous, because followed by the Words ‘makes hats,’ which showed he was a hatter. It was struck out. The next observed, that the word ‘makes,* might as well he omitted, because bis customers would uot care who made the hats; if good, and to their mind, they would buy, by whomsoever made. He struck that out also. A third said, he thought the words ‘for ready money’ w re useless as it was not the custom of the place to sell on a credit; every one who purchased, expected to pay. These too were parted with and the preserption then stood,—“John Thompson sells hats.” Sells hats!” says his next friend; “why who expects you to give them away?” What, then, is the use of the word?” It was struck out, and hats wa*> all that remained attached to the name of John Thompson. Even this inscription, brief us it was, was reduced ultimately to ‘John Thompson,’ with the figure of a hut subjoined. We never saw parental feel ing and Christian resignation aov where better expressed savs the Philadelphia Press than in the following observa tion of the Uv. C. Wolfe, on the death of his children. VMv gems are falling away; bir l do hope ami trust it is because God is making up his jewels. * ‘I have lived’said the inde fatigable K. l>. Clarke,‘to know that the greatest secret of hu man happiness is this—never suffer your energies to stag nate. The old adage of ‘too many irons in the fire,’ con veys an abominable lie.—You w cannot have too many; poker tongs, and all—keep them all going.’ louch (itWVC l fir vte&zw r*. /k late Buffalo Emporium had an advertisement, which concluded with a notice that Mw * or three genteel persons of colour * could be accommo dated with hoarding and lodg ing. We suppose somebody as genteel as Sambo described to Cuffy, would suit the adver tiser. Cuffy . Well Sambo, how you cum on at de ball, last night? Sambo. Oh berry bad: I ask Miss Dinah to dance; and Miss Dinah she so berry gen teel, she—fainted away in a minute. An Irishman was vainly en deavoring to keep up with a sad-boat on a canal. On com ing to a lock, the boat lowered her sails to pass when the Irish man giving up the contest, ex claimed—Wrrali! my jewel, I'll run no longer with you, for if you bate me with your clothes on, what will you do when you strip to it.” When Dr. Johnson courted Hiss Porter, who he afterwards married, he told her, ‘that he was ol mean extraction, that he had no money, and that an un cle of his had been flanged ’ The lady, by way of reducing herself to an equality with him replied* ‘that she had no noie money than himself, and hat though none of her relation* had been hanged, she had fifty wiio deserved hanging,* A commercial traveller late iy left an article belonging to his wardrobe at an inn, ami wrote to the chambermaid to forward it to hint by coach; in mswer to which he received die following;'— •I It pe, dear *.r, 3 <>u*11 not feel hart— I’ll frankly tell ynu ill iw Ive in>uie a slul with yu<>v olvi Ami you imut make a sffiif! without it.’ Many a line woman lus lost her reputation thruugn the gab ling of mischief making gossips; indeed the whole hisluiy and progress ol scandal may be traced to something nke the following, Which is rather more at la.ge than a piece el the same nature heretofore pub lished: Mrs. Hopkins told me she heard Sum Grub’s wile say that John Harris’s wile told her that Granny Smith heatd that it was no and iubt the vv dow Ba ker said that ( apt VVoods wife thought that Colonel Lane’s wife believed that old Airs. Lamb reckoned positively that Peter Dunham’s w.le had told Nell Cuscudgeu that her aunt had declared to the world that jit was gen‘.rally believed that mother Parker had said in plain terms that she heard Betsev m Cook say that her sister Polly , had said that it was well known bv the neighborhood that old M rs. Should made no bones of saying that in her opinion it was a mutter of fact thfct Dolly Light linger would soon be o bliged to lengthen hei % apron strings . Why ought a young goat sleeping to he sent before a magistrate? Because it is kid , napping: Receipt f°r Indigestion , Chole ra Morbus, Summer com plaint in Caildren, or any complaint in the stornucti or Bowels, viz: Quarter pound rhubarb, half ounce carraway seed, half ounce orange peel; iniuse them in one quart best French bran dy, and let them stand lor twelve hours before using For a grown person, two thirds of a wine giass lull once a day, or every six hours (if the case requires it) —and iur a child, a tea spoon lull taKen at discretion. Ibis mixture checks the most obstinate dys eiitaiy; keeps the bowels gent ly open; promotes digestion, and is one of the most effect ual to nicks in all the materia luedica. Remedies fur Indigestion. Os indigestion two ul the prominent Futures are flatu kJice and acidity; and the rem- these states are cleai ly indicated. They are al kalies and niagnes*a; and the advantages which the latter, in the general way possesses over the former, is tins: that, as containing an alkaline prin ciple, the stomach acidity i* neutralized by its administra tion; and a purgative suit being formed, in some measuie, by the combination, the doubie purpose is thus effected ol a corrective and an aperient. A tea spoon full or two of mag nesia, thrown into a glass ol wu er, and taken before going to res., will often anticipate as it were the acid formation in tfie stomach, which Would be otherwise consequent upon a little irregularity oi eating or dr nking; and will desiine the individual to a good, who oth erwise would pass a restl s uncomfortable night. When a more positive purgative is re quired, it will be right to com bine the sulphate of magnesia (epsom salts) with the car bonate (common magnesia.) 1 wo large tea sp >ons full of the former, with one of the latter, will constitute a good a perient; and for a gouty invalid, one tea spoon full of the fluid I caibonate of ammonia (sal vol atile) will be tound useful; or, if the hahit be cold, two o: three spoons lull of tincture of rhu barb may be advantageously mixed with the salts and mag nes’a. Four thousand pounds of BACON. The subscriber will sell four thou sand pounds of Baron cured in the best manner, low for cash, or on a credit until the 25th day of December next, the purchaser giving small notes with good security. Apply at the Post Office. JOHN MOORE. W arrenton, June 21. 4-ts AGRICULTURE. In order to dissemiuate extensively the many advantages which must flow from the developement of new tesomcet and valuable improvements in the Agri cultural World, it is reasonable to pre sume, that a proper medium for the accu mulation and distribution of practical knowledge, must prove of the first impor ance. A periodical publication, dovotetd to these purposes, if conducted with spir it and industry, cannot prove otherwise than eminently useful. Under these impressions, the publishers have determined on ottering to the Agri cultural community, the FA RMEIiS* AIA GAZINE, as a repository of u-dtfl information; -atisfied that they cannot render to their ountry a more valuable seivice, or betterc ontribute to its permanent prosperity,c iian in subserving, as they hope to do, itst agricultural interests. The leading feature of this publication will be sustained by our own ample resour ces, united to the promised contributions f several Agricultural Societies, and the assistance of distinguished agricultu rists in (hi* and other States. The Literary ami Scientific Depart ment will be conducted by a gentleman, h-re to fore editor of a popular literary journal. In furtherance of their views, the pub lishers solicit original contributions on \gricu!ture. Horticulture, Rural and Domestic Economy, &c. and the co-pe*- a ion of agriculturists and the fiiends of igncUiture throughout the country to horn is respectfully Submitted the ful .owing. PROPOSALS FOR PUBLISHING In the City of Pci. THE FA KM E RS’ P R ACT'ICaL MAGAZINE; Or, Agricultural and Literary Cazele. The FARMERS MAGAZINE is de igned to contain information drawn liom authentic sources, relative to the mprovement and management of retnark bie Farms; sources of manner; number tnd kind of stock: Farming Utensils,* Laborers, Dairies, kc,. Agricultural Im* urovemet ts, Drawings and Descriptions f useful inven ions; Ci ideal Notices md Reviews of such publications as may end to the interests of the Husbandman; tsnpruvmeuts in the Breed of Domestic \nimals Accounts of such Foreign and ‘domestic Trees, Shrubs, Vines, Plants, “■eeds, and Grams, as are considered rse *ssary or useful for Subsistence, Com fort or Ornament, with information rel itive to their treatment , growth, requisite und of Soil, and, in short', whatever may tend to increase the product of the soil and advance the rural economy of the country. Insertion will alwavs be given to such Reports, Addresses, and Papers as may b communicated for publication by the several Agricuituial Societies of this aticl other States. A Land Register will contain, as far as practicable, a list of Farms which are iow, or may hereafter be for sale, ac ouut of their size, situation, quality, and •iich other particulars as may be deemed iseful. Space will he afforded for the solid and sterling beauties of Literamre, the useful \rts and Sciences, Chemistry, Natural History and Philosophy, Biography, and Travels, State of the Markets in the prin cipal Seaports, kc. &c. —-The Fanners’ Maga izme will be published semi-monthly; the price is three dollars per annum, payable either at the time, of subscribing, or on j receipt nf she first number. That form and size has been adopted, which is ideemed most convenient for binding, while the qualify of paper, the beauty of the type, (entirely new,) and the general execution of the work, will be such, as it is hoped, will reflect credit ou the pub lishers. and gatify its patrons, i Address (post paid) THOMAS C CLARK, Agent for the Proprietors, No, 48. Makel-street, Philadelphia* copying the above, may contribute to the inteiests of an invalua ble science, and will receive a copy of the w^rk. THE CABINET Is published every Saturday , by P. L. ROBINSON, Warrenton , * Geo . at three dollars per annnm. which may be discharged by two dollars and fifty cents if paid within sijety days of the time (f subscribing.