Newspaper Page Text
By HOLDBB ft WILLIAMSON.
VOL. XIX.
CANCER IS DEADLY!
Fatally in Nina disease often first appeal.
ralaM J 111 nIMO as a mere scratch, a pimple, or lumpin
nf Ton I too small to attract any
UUI Ul lull A notice, until, in many cases, the deadly
Cure Found at Last. dl cTce“ by a e^cai
• • _ _ | . operation, because the disease is a virulent
poison in the blood, circulating throughout the system, and although
the sore or ulcer —known as the Cancer —may be cut away, the
poison remains in the blood, and promptly breaks out afresh, with
renewed violence.
The wonderful success of S. S. S. in curing obstinate, deep-seated
blood diseases which were considered incurable, induced a few de
spairing sufferers to try it for Cancer, after exhausting the skill of
the physicians without a cure. Much to their delight S. S. S proved
equal to the disease and promptly effected a cure. The glau news
spread rapidly, and it was soon demonstrated _
beyond doubt that a cure had at last been
found for deadly Cancer. Evidence has accu- k
mulated which is incontrovertible, of which
the following is a specimen : ifJiSKjRSpS
“Canoer is hereditary in our family, my father, a
sister and an aunt having died from this dreadful
disease. My feelings may be imagined when the hor- H
rible disease made its appearance on my side. It was
A ujalignant Cancer, eating inwardly in such a way as
f cause great alarm. The disease seemed beyond the
■kill of the doctors, for their treatment did no good F Hfirair|.lv
whatever, the Cancer growing worse all the while.
Numerous remedies were used for it but the Cancer Mas. s. m. idol.
grew steadily worse, until it seemed that I was doomed
to follow the others of the family, for I know how deadly Cancer is. especially
when inherited. I was advised to try Swift’s Specific (S. S. S), which, from the
first day, forced out the poison. I continued its use until I had taken eighteen
bottles, when I was cured sound and well, and have had no symptoms of the
dreadful affliction, though many years have elapsed. S. S. S. is the only cure
for Cancer.— Mrs. S M. Idol, Winston, N. C.
Our book on Cancer, containing other testimonials and valuable
information, will be sent free to any address by the Swift Specific
Company, Atlanta, Georgia.
MARTIN
INSTITUTE,
JEFFERSON, GEORGIA,
An Endowed School, Magnificent Building,
Excellent Equipment.
faculty.
Ernest Neal President.
B. Marnix Mathematics and Commercial Branches.
Mrs. J. N. Holder English and Latin.
Miss Julia Beil High School Department.
Mrs. Ernest Neal Primary Department.
Miss Selma Niblack Drawing and Painting.
Miss May Storey Vocal and Instrumental Music.
• t EXPENSES
Tuition is entirely free to all Jackson coun
ty pupils between the ages of 6 and 18 years.
Students over 18 years of age and living in the county, will be charged
only 900 a mo.
Non-resident students, $1 per mo.
Incidental fee, 50c, payable in advance.
Board in home of the president, $8 per mo.
Book-keeping and Stenography are not included in our regular courß“
but will be taught at reasonable rates by Prof. B. Marnix, a specialist ir>
this Hue of school work.
Music, $3 per mo.
A?|t, $3 per mo.
During the present year, more than 250 students have attended this
school. With our increased advantages and free tuition, we expect to en
roll 300 oames next term.
Spring Term begins January Ist, 1900.
Our discipline will be firm, but kind. Teachers are required to re
mam on school ground at noon recess. For further information about our
live, progressive school, send for catalogue. ERNEST NEAL, Pres.
The Georgia Railroad .
The f llowiog named agents are
prepared to furnish full and reliable
information regarding *ll schedules
and rates to alt pointr North, South,
East and West.
Information given regarding all
routes, both as to partenger and
freight.
Communicate with any of the agents
named, and you will receive pron pt
reply.
A. 6. JACKSON, JOE W WHITE,
G*nl. Pass, agent. Traveling Pass Ag’t
Frank W. Coffin, S. F. & P. A.,
At Augusta, Qa
S. W. Wilkes, C. F. & P. A., At
lanta, Gi.
M. R Hudson, T. F. and P. A.,
Atlanta, G*.
S. E. Magill, C. A, Macon, Ga.
W. W Hardwick, S A., Maoon, Ga.
C. D. Cox, G. A., Athens, Ga
Also agents at Washington, Madi
son, Mill**dgßYilie, Union Point and
C vin ton
R. E Morgan, C. A., Chattanooga,
Tenn.
Tim H Mo re, C. A., Nashville,
Tenn.
W. W Lumpkin, T. F. A, Colum
bia, S C.
W. I. C >rmier, C. A., Charleston,
S. C.
Dyspepsia Cure
Digests what you eat.
It artificially digests the food and aid 9
Nature in strengthening and recon
structing the exhausted digestive or
gans. It is the latest discovered digest
ant and tonic. No other preparation
can approach It In efficiency. It in
stantly relieves and no nnanently cures
Dyspepsia, Indigestion, Heartburn,
Fiatu'ence, Sou* stomach, Nausea,
Sick Headache,Gastralgia,Cramps,and
all other results of imperfect digestion.
Prepared by E C. OeWIU a Cos., Chicago
, SMITH & KLDJ£R.
THE JACKSON HERALD.
Save Your Money.
One box of Tutt’s Pills will save
many dollars in doctors’ bills
They will surely cure all diseases
of the stomach, liver or bowels.
No Reckless Assertion
For sick headache, dyspepsia,
malaria, constipation and bilio
usness, a million people endorse
TUTT’S Liver PILLS
RUSSBLL A ARMISTEAD,
ATTORNRTB AT LAW,
Offices at Winder and Jefferson
DR. A. B. MERRITT, D. D. 8 ,
Gainesville, Ga.
Will be In Jefferson the first Monday in each
month and remain < ne week, for the purpose
ot doing Uklds of <i?ntal work. Office over
N. N. Pendergrass store.
6. W. BROWN.
ATTOMT AT LAW,
Jefferson, 6a.
Will do a general practice, collecting a spe
cialty . Office over Herald office.
JAMBS M. MBKKITT,
ATTORN IT AXD COUXULOB AT LAW,
Jefferson, 6a.
rflmnr ittunMon rlT*B to ImdnM
W W. STARK,
ATTORKIT AT LAW,
Harmony Grove, Ga.
FANNIB ANDSRBON) l ibel for divorce, In
VS. > Jackson Superior
WILLIAM andßson.| Court, Aug. term, ‘W
To William Andersen:
You are n<-rebv notified and required to b
and aepear at the next trm of toe Superior
Court'o be held In and for said county on the
first Monday in February, iWO, then and there
to answer plaintiff’s cO" p‘alnf—as In default
thereof,<he court win proceed as to Justice
shall appertain, Witness 'he Hoi R. B. Rus
sell, Judge of said court. This Dec- 15, 1899.
A C. Appleby, C s. C.
V. M JOHNS ) Übei for divorce,
VS. y Jackson Superior court,
JOHN B JOHNS.) Augusr T erm< tgel
To John B Jobns: -You are he-eby notified
and -equtred 'o be and appear at the nev t*rn
of the superior court to be held In nd for said
coun y on first Monday In February, WOO, then
and there * o answer ?be i>lalntlff's complaint—
as In default, thereof, the cour r will proceed as
to JusMoe shall tain w itness the Honora
ble K. B WnseelL Judg" of said ourt. This the
94th day of November, i99
A C APPLEBY. O. 8. a
How Are T oar Kidneys
Dr Hobbs S psragus Pills cure all kidney Ills. Sam,
pie free. Add. Sieiuue fUuaedy Cos., CUcago or N. Y.
The Lord’d Work.
“I declare. I’m downright dis
co araged! I work early and late,
day and night, and am never
through. It seems as though the
Lord just piles work on me! Well,
if he does it, I suppose it must be all
right, and I’ll say nothing more
about it.”
And the poor overworked woman
dropped her sewing into her lap and
leaned back in her chair with a weary
sigh.
“If it really is the Lord’s work,”
said Aunt Jane.
“Now what do you mean by that,
Aunt Jane? It seems as if, by your
tone, you doubted whether he does
send it.”
“Well, Eliza, to tell .the truth, I
do,” answered Aunt Jane, laying
down her knitting and looking at the
tired face before her. “I do doubt
very much if the Lord sent you all
the work that you have done to-day.
I am pretty fully persuaded that you
have made a good part of it—the
part that tired you most—and now
you are laying it to the Lord’s
sending.”
“Well, I never!” exclaimed Eliza,
sitting bolt upright in her chair, and
letting her arms fall from her apron,
in which she wound them for sup
port. “Well, I never did!” And
her voice was full of indignant pro
test.
“Now, Eliza, don’t be angry with
me without a cause. You are a just
woman, and I want you to listen to
what I have to say. I want to go
over the work of to-day. What
first?”
“First, I got breakfast,” said
Eliza, who was a just woman and
ready to listen to reason; “then I
cleared up and got the children off
to school.”
“The Lord’s work, sure enough,”
said Aunt Jane.
“After that I made my cake for
to-morrow. Well, what of that?” as
Aunt Jane shook her head.
“How many kinds, Eliza?”
“Six; but what of that?”
“Why six? Would not two, or at
the most three, have been enough
with all the other things you are go
ing to have?”
“Mrs. Simpson had six at her tea
party, and I’m not going to be out
done by her,” said Eliza.
Again Aunt Jane shook her head;
but her time was not yet.
“Then it was time to get dinner,
and clear that up; and after that I
had the trimming to rip off Mary’s
Iress. That took me till supper
time, and I have been ever since sew
ing it on again; and my eyes ache
bke the toothache, and I’m so beat
out that I shan’t get to sleep for
hours after I go to bed.”
“And so will not get half the rest
you will need for all that extra work
to-morrow. But why could not that
dress have done as it was? I
thought it very neat and pretty.”
“Well, I thought so myself until
I saw Abby Smith’s new one, and
then I saw that the trimming was
put on in au old fashioned wav, and
WHY HJEJCURES.
The Greatest Specialist of the Time Gives
Every Case His Personal Attention.
RnMn. Most doctors have a certain number
uui. ior- of stock remedies which they use in
Hathaway's all cases which seem at all similar.
u.iL.j This is not Dr. Hathaway's method,
wiexnou. Everycaso with him is most carefully
—rjgr- diagnosed and the exact
ixwition of tho diseased con
dition determined. Thus
every caso is treated separ-
W utely and medicines are ad
. B min is tore and which are
nlWi 3?? specially prepared under
,7 Dr. Hathaway’s personal
BA:-..-. A v 7 supervision for each case.
Vy -. J Noiwopeopleare affected
by a particular disease) a the
aine manner, consequent
-WfeS v 'Ay! Iy no two people should be
treated in the same way
jgmgt,-' oven for same complaint.
Dr. Hathaway is a special
ist in tho best sense of the
vjY 'wjw word—he treats special dis-
— —V- eases in a special manner of
of his own—a system studied out years a-o while in
n. r . college and hospital practice and Im
hvery base provodand enlarged uponconstantly
Soeciallv during the twenty years since—
twenty years of the most extensive
Trested. practice enjoyed by any specialist in
tbiscountTV Dr. Hathaway’s great and uniform suc
cess is due to this individual system of treatment.
V • In spite of hundreds of requests
Exclusive yearly from doctors in all parts of the
Treatment world, asking for the privilege of
nsinvDr.Hathaway’smcthoJof treatmonl,he believes
it wiser to allow none beside himself the knowledge
of his remedies, as he is too well aware of the mis
chief which may be done by the unskillful use of any
, system, never mind how perfect.
Blood and Skin Dr. Hathaway’s treatment for
D!,.,,., blood diseases in whatever stage
.seasss, cures all forms of ulcers, sores,
blotches, pimples, etc.,and not only restores the skin
and scalp hr their natural coaditlon, bntso purifies
the Hood that the disease is permanently and com
pletely driven from the system and all this without
administering poisonous or dangerous drugs.
His treatment of Varicocele
Varicocele and and Stricture is a method exclu-
Stricture. Bi 7 e! Jf hlB °*' a an<l in 90 Pf cent
3 of all cas-'s results in a perfect
and permanent cure. No operation is required and
no pain or inconvenience are experienced bv the
•■atient. The expense of this treatment is much less
than that of any operation, or hospital or Institute
treatment, and is both safe and sure, restoring the
organs to a condition of perfect, normal heal‘b.
. Dr. Hathaway has just prepareda new
Kidney test question blank for those who have
TlUea&es reason to suspect Kidney trouble and
Ulftinin, this pj ank will gladly send free to
iveryono who sends him his name and address.
u D , The demand for Dr. Hatbavrav’g new
Mew BOOK book “Manliness, Vigor, Health” has
pgrr already exhausted the first edition of
100,000 but for a li mi ted time a copy of
h.s book will be sent free to anyone who sends his
n „ name and address to Dr. Hathaway.
'OnSUlttUm Dr. Hathaway makes no charge
?arE. for consultation andadvice at either
hi* office or by mail.
l. NEWTON HATHAWAY M. D.
Dr. Hathaway <& Cos.,
ftiH South Broad Street. Atlanta, Ga.
MSNTXOX THIS PAPKH VUAN WHITING,
DEVOTED TO JACKSON COUNTY AND THE DEMOCRATIC PARTY.
JEFFERSON, JACKSON COUNTY, GA.. FRIDAY JANUARY 5.1900
I wasn’t going to have Mary looking
old-style to-morrow just because her
mother was too lazy to do a little
sewing.”
“And you call that the Lord's
work! Well, I don’t. Eliza, I’m
going to have my 6ay, and you
musn’t interrupt me till I am done.
I don’t call spending your precious
time and strength making, six kinds
of cake when two would answer as
well, for the sake of not being out
done by Mrs. Simpson, the Lord’s
work. I don’t call straining your
eyes and using up two hours, when
you might have been resting, in
taking off and putting on trimming,
so that some silly girl might not be
able to call Mary’s dress old-fashion,
the Lord’s work; if for no other rea
son than because it made you nerv
ous and unreasonable, so that you
spoke sharply to John and sent
Mary to bed crying. Shall I tell you
hat I heard your little girls saying
just now as I sat iu my room?
“‘Oh!’ said Kitty, ‘I wish mamma
would take us on her lap and kiss us
once in a while like Mollie’s mother.’
“ ‘So do I,’ said Ella; ‘but mother
is always so busy, you know, Kitty,
she does not have time.’
“I tell you, Eliza, it made my
heart ache to think how you are neg
lecting some of the Lord’s work for
the sake of that which you have
made. One part cf the work which
the Lord has given you is the care
of your health, for how can you be
what you might be, what you ought
to be to youi family, if you are al
ways tired and nervous? What does
Mary care that the trimming is
sewed on her dress in the newest
style, when her mother has broken
her heart with sharp, unloving words?
What is it to your little children that
your table is loaded with cake, if you
are always too busy to hold them in
your lap, or to give them a loving
kiss? If necessary—which it never
will be—let the dust lie thick on
your furniture rather than have your
children grow up without a mother!
You need not open your eyes. Y'ou
are an excellent housekeeper, but not
much of a mother, yet, Eliza. And
now I don’t want you to speak one
word or answer'me for ten minutes
by the clock. You are awfully an
gry now, but when you have thought
over what I have said for that time,
you won’t do anything but thank me;
for you’re a just woman, Eliza, and
you are going to be one of the best
mothers the Lord ever made after
to-night.”
The ten minutes were not qnite
up when Eliza rose and left the room.
Silently she entered her daughter’s
bedroom. All was quiet, but when
she came to the bedside she heard a
little sob. In a moment she was on
her knees beside the bed, and Mary
was gathered in her mother’s arms
as she had never been since she
could wa'k alone. What passed be
tween them they only knew; but if
any more tears were shed that Bight
they were tears of joy. The little
girls were fast asleep in each other’s
arms, and did not feel the longed for
kisses, but they would to-morrow.
Aunt Jane had fallen into a gentle
doze when Eliza returned, but stared
broad awake to find her standing by
her side.
“Aunt Jane,” she said, “you said
gome pretty severe things to me, but
not too severe. I was in a desperate
way and needed desperate remedies.
You were right; I thank you from
my heart Good night.”
For some time Annt Jane tat with
her hands folded, her lips moving a*
though in prayer.
“It seemed as thongh the Lord
had laid it on me to do it,” the mur
mured finally, “and I did not dare
shirk it, thongh it was despera'eiv
hard to do; and now I can never be
thankful enough that I did!”—North
Carolina Advocate.
Aunt Martha—For merev’s sake,
what are you crying about, Carrie?
Carrie—Harry called me ‘dearest’
to-day.
Annt Martha—l’m sure that was
nice.
Carrie—Why, Auntie, don’t you
sec, if lam dearest, somebody else
must be dearer. If there is it will
surely break my heart—Ex.
Physician’s Strangest Case.
“What was the strangest case I
ever had?” said one of the surgeons
in attendance at the late convention,
repeating the question of a reporter
with whom he was chatting. “Well,
let me see. I believe the oddest in
cident of my career occurred in—but
hold! on second thought I don’t care
to give any names or dates.
“The facts, if you like, were these:
I was called by a messenger to a
cheap boarding house one evening to
attend a man who was said to have
been hurt iu a fight. I found a
young man of 25 or thereabouts, half
dazed, with a bloody contusion on
one side of his cheeks and a badly
broken nose. The bridge was
smashed almost flat with the face,
and I saw at once that the case would
need very careful handling to pre
vent great disfigurement. Not to
bother you with technical details, I
confined myself that night to a su
perficial dressing and deferring fur
ther proceedings until next day.
When I called the following morn
ing the young man had quite re
covered his senses, and although his
clothes were shabby and all his sur
roundings poor and mean, it was evi
dent from his hands, talk and bear
ing that he had never done any hard
work and was a person of education
and refinement. I took him for the
black sheep of some good family, but
made no comments, and explained
briefly that I would try to restore
his nose as far as possible by per
forming a slight operation and in
serting an artificial support. To my
astonishment he objected flatly, and
insisted upon letliog it heal exactly
as it was. ‘But you will be fright
fully disfigured,’ I protested; ‘I doubt
if your best friends would recognize
you.’ Strange to say, that assurance
seemed to render him only the firmer,
and I was compelled to let him have
his way. It was nearly three weeks
before he was well, and, as I antici
pated, he looked exactly like some
battered bruiser of the prize ring.
“I never saw the mau again, but
six months later I was shown the
photograph of a handsome young
chap who was badLy wanted for a big
embezzlement. I put my finger ovar
the nose and recognized my late pa
tient. He had walked aboard ship
right under the eyes of the detec
tives and sailed for the Argentine
Republic. They had his photo, but
never dreamed cf connecting it wiih
the caved-in countenance of that par
ticular passenger.”
“Did he get somebody to break
his nose on purpose?” asked the re
porter.
‘*l never ascertained,” said the sur
geon.—New Orleans Times-Demo
crat.
“Shall I sing ‘Because I Love
Yoti?’ ” asked Mrs. Darley, as she
seated herself at the piano.
“No,” replied Mr. Darley, who is a
brute; “if you love me, don’t sing.”
—Ex.
Friend—Why do you have such
misspelled and ungrammatical signs
in your front windows?
Sharp Tradesman— People think
I’m a dunce and come in to swindle
me. Trade’s just booming.—Ex.
The Eminent Kidney
and Bladder Specialist.
Tie Discoverer of Swam*-Root at Work la
Els Laboratory.
There is a disease prevailing in this
country most dangerous because so decep
tive. Many sudden deaths are caused by
It—heart disease, pneumonia, heart failure
or apoplexy are often the result of kidney
disease. If kidney trouble is allowed to ad
vance the kidney-poisoned blood will attack
the vital organs, or the kidneys themselves
break down and waste away cell by cell.
Then the richness of the blood—the albumen
—leaks out and the sufferer has Bright’s
Disease, the worst form of kidney trouble.
Dr. Kilmer's Swamp-Root the new dis
covery is the true specific for kidney, bladder
and urinary troubles. It has cured thousands
of apparently hopeless cases, after all other
efforts have failed. At druggists in fifty-cent
and dollar sizes. A sample bottle sent free
by mail, also a book telling about Swamp-
Root and its wonderful cures. Address
Dr. Kilmer & Cos., Binghamton, N. Y. and
mention this paper.
A Freak in Chnrcli.
“The greatest human monstrosity
of the nineteenth century was ex
hibited a few nights ago at the
Thirteenth Street Colored Baptist
church, Covington, where a revival
was being held, says the Covington,
Ky., Post A living woman, per
fertly formed in every way, with two
heads, four arms, four legs, double
kneed and double-jointed, with eyes
in the sides of her head, was the cu
riosity. With superstitious awe the
assembled colored people gazed upon
this extraordinary combination.
“Fo’ God,” said one old negro,
reverently, “she is de most salam
bacious lookin’ woman dat I ever did
see. My ole woman can see enough
out of two eyes, but when it comes
to fo’ excuse me,” and the old fellow
shuffled off with an indignant look
at the four-eyed monstrosity.
She could sing like a mocking
bird, or play the guitar. She said
she had sung before all the crowned
heads of Europe. She can read a
book with two eyes and flirt with
the ice man with the other two. She
can keep her eyes from picking and
stealing, but she cannot keep her
lips from evil Bpeaking, for, the Post
reporter heard one pair of lips sing
ing “Because I Love You,” while the
other pair was ‘cursing’ the band
man.—Ex.
Woman’s Love.
Apart from the notoriety which
Bob Ingersol achieved by his an
tagonism to the Christian religion,
he was noted as a master of rhetoric
and eloquence. Here is what he
once said about woman’s love:
“The one thing in this world that
is constant,|the peak that rises above
all clouds, the one window in which
the light that forever burns, the one
star that darkness cannot quench, is
woman’s love. It rises to the grand
est heights and falls to the lowest
depths; it forgives the most cruel
wrongs; it is perennial of life, and
grows in every clime. Neither cold
ness nor neglect, harshness nor
cruelty, can extinguish it. A wo
man’s love is the perfume of the
heart. This is the real love that sub
dues the earth, the love that has
wrought all miracles in art, that
gives us music all the way from the
cradle song to the grand symphony
that bears the soul away on the
wings of fire; a love that is greater
than power, sweeter than life, and
stronger than death.”—Ex.
The Same Old Story.
“I wandered to the circus, John; I
sat beneath the tent, and saw the
man from Borneo, likewise the tat
tooed gent. I heard the toothless
lion’s howl, while men in spraDgled
clothes stepped fearlessly into their
dens and whacked them on the
nose. I saw the sacred elephant
spout water through his trunk, the
salamander eating lead and other
melted junk. I heard the merry
clown get off the jokes we used to
know, when we were boys together,
John, some twenty years ago. The
same old horses waddled ’round the
same old kind of ring, the same old
comic vocalists proved they couldn’t
sing. The same old hippopotamus
was grunting with disgust, the same
old Persian ox was kicking up the
dust. The same old rheumatic
acrobats crawled painfully around,
*nd the ossified contortionist was
•rawling on the ground. And ladies
rode barebacked, steeds to music sad
and slow, the same old girls we used
to see some twenty years ago.”—
Minneapolis Messenger.
At a Christmas entertainment in
Cleveland the other day, Senator
Hanna made a littla speech, during
the course of which he said that the
first Christmas gift he ever got was
a sugar dog, which cost probably
five cents; and no gift since that
time, he declared, had ever given
iim so much pleasure. With tha 1
statement as a basis, a New York
paper figures out that Senator Hanna
is now able to buy one hundred and
twenty millions of sugar dogs at five
cents each—enough to four sugar
dogs to every child in the Uaited
States and the colonies. —Ex.
Some Good Advice.
A set of rules for young men to
follow are those laid down by a man
who built up an immense business,
the ramifications of which extended
all over the United States. They
will bear perusal, and are as follows:
Keep good company or none.
Never be idle.
If your hands cannot be usefully
employed, attend to the cultivation
of your mind.
Always speak the truth. Make few
promises.
Live up to your engagements.
Keep your own secrets, if you have
any.
When you speak to a person, look
him in the face.
Good company and good conver
sation are the very sinews of virtue.
Good character is above all things
else.
Your character cannot be essen
tially injured except by your, own
acts.
If any one speaks evil of you, let
your life be so that none will believe
him.
Drink no kind of intoxicating
liquors.
Ever live (misfortunes excepted)
within your income.
When you retire to bed think over
what you have been doing .during
the day.
Make no haste to be rich if you
would prosper.
Small and steady gains give com
petency, with tranquility of mind.
Never play at any game of chance.
Avoid temptation, through fear
you may not withstand it.
Earn money before you spend it.
Never run into debt unless you see
a way to get out again.
Never borrow if you can possibly
avoid it.
Do not marry until you are able to
support a wife.
Never speak evil of any one.
Be jußt before you are generous.
Keep yourself innocent if you
would be happy.
Save when young,to spend
when you are old.
Read over the above maxims at
least once a week.—Chicago Jour
nal.
The Circuit Rider’s Horse.
At one time, the Rev. Frank Gun
saulus, the popular preacher, was a
poor circuit rider. He traveled from
town to town, was lifted over the
roads in farm wagons, and boarded
around at the houses of the deacons*
returning occasionally to his father’s
old farm to spend a few days. His
father, so the story goes, was a
rough old chap of the uncut diamond
sort, with a vocabulary more expres
sive than elegant.
Well, at one time, young Gunsau
lus found himself in possession of
enough money to buy a horse. He
thought it would be better to ride
his own animal around the circuit
than to borrow transportation. It
was a sorry looking steed, but it an
swered the purpose, and what was
more to the point, it was cheap. So
after he had bought it he rode it
home. His father was in the barn
yard when he came in,and he looked
critically at the animal.
“Where did you git that boss,
Frank?” he asked.
“I bought him cheap, father,” said
the young preacher.
“He’s a sorry lookin’ critter,l must
say,” said the father.
“Well, father,” said Frank, “you
remember that our Savior rode into
Jerusalem on a worse looking animal
than this.”
“Darned if I don’t think it’s the
same one.”—Chicago Chronicle.
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High Lights.
There is no fun in grumbling when
nobody pays any attention.
Nature is kind; any artist can
paint a sunset and sell it for a sun
rise.
Knowledge is power sometimes
when communicated, at other times
when withheld.
Dignity and pride are lonely be
cause happiness always wants to sit
in somebody’s lap.
Life is not short when we count
up all the foolishness we have had
time to indulge in.
He who does many things correct
ly and makes one error will hear only
of the error.
Luck consists in getting a few of
the desirable things we started out
in life determined to have.
Love can’t break a man’s heart
after he has got old enough to take
an artistic interest in his dinners.
When a woman truly loves a man
she admires his indifference more
than the attentions of other men.—
Ex.
Just Like Boys.
“I’m afraid Willie will disgrace the
family, John.”
“What has he been up to now?”
“Why, I gave him a quarter to
buy a scrap book.”
“Well, what did he do?”
“Brought home a book called
‘Points on Pugilism.’ ”
“Freddie, do you know what the
Bible says about a lie?” asked his
mother with feigned severity.
“Yeth ma'am,” lisped Freddie, “a
lie is an abomination unto the Lord
and a very refuge in time of trou
ble.”
Mother—No, Johnnie, you must
not piok those apples yet They are
green and they will make you sick.
Johnnie—l know that, but if I
don’t get them now the other kids
will get all of ’em before they’re
ripe.
Broken Commandments.
The brilliant young preacher when
he makes his parochial calls endeav
ors to cultivate an acquaintance with
the development of the younger
minds, thus after a fashion keeping
tab upon his Sunday school teachers.
The other afternoon, while he was
waiting in the drawing room of a
beautiful Cass avenue residence, for
the delayed of Elsie’s
mamma, he was entertained by the
little daughter herself. Taking her
upon his lap he began a review of
the church lessons that had been
given to a little maid of five.
“Can you tell me, Elsie, how many
commandments there are?”
“Yes, sir; seven or eight.”
“Oh, no, dear; there are ten.”
“Yes, I know there used to be, but
1 heard papa tell mamma yesterday
that you had broken two or three of
them at least, and that would leave
only seven or eight, you know.”—
Ex.
A fellow tells as that in a country
postoffice not far away hangs thia
sign:
“No letters will be delivered until
they are received. If you don’t get
a letter or paper on the day yon are
expecting it,have the postmaster look
in all the boxes and down in the
cellar also; it ought to be there
somewhere; he likes to look for
you. If your friends won’t write,
cuss the postmaster. If the post
master tells you that there is no mail
for you, put on a grieved expression,
and say there ought to be some. He
is probably hiding it for the pleas
ure of having you call two or three
times. Ask him to look again. If
you don’t get your paper, write to
the editor and give him the devil.”
—Hayesville Courier.
Tommie Brown—ls your big sis
ter engaged to Mr. White?
Susie Green—No, an’ I guess she
don’t want to be.
Tommie Brown—Did she say so?
Susie Green—No, but she knowed
he was cornin’ to-night an’ she eat
onions at supper.—Ex.
“I’m afraid,” remarked the stamp
on the love letter, “that, strictly
speaking, I’m not sticking to faota.”
—Ex.
NO. 49.