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h * / n I TT1 t ❖ ELLAYILLE PUBLISHING CO. India, Central Asia and China produce about one-sixth of the 800,000 tons of the world’s annual wool clip. ■ An American company has leased Aboukir Bay from the Egyptian Gowmi. ment to grow oysters therein. New York has found it necessary increase the taxes, and it is now $2.23 on the $100, and Philadelphia has done likewise and increased to $2.06 on $100. Even Jerusalem is in the nineteen th- century swim, and has a real estate boom, l and near the city has gone up five hundred per cent, within the last few years. A colored man by the name of Ross, •who was lately convicted of murder in ■ the first degree and sentenced to be banged at Brandenburg, Ky., was granted a new trial on the ground that he had not be«n convicted by a jury of his peers. There was no colored man on the jury that tried him. The taste for realism is extending, ■observes the Commercial Advertiser. In Nova Scotia the other day three small boys, under eight years all of them, bound and gagged another small boy and proceeded to play “killing pig" so successfully that they cut his throat fatally to get tho proper flow of blood. I.ord Wolseley says that one of the bravest men he ever knew is Lieuienant- General Sir Gerald Graham, V. C., who was in chief command at the battle of El Teb, in Africa. Graham is several inches over six feet in height, and rather indolent physically. Many times Wolse¬ ley has seen him endanger his life rather ’ban take a few extra steps in safety. ( ' r e Rafael, a weather-beaten gypsy. has petitioned the Emperor of Austria to allow him to be invested with the sovereignty of all gypsies everywhere, offering to show incontestably his descent from that Pharaoh who would not let Israel go, and also, if his petition be granted, to make the gypsies cease from vagrancy and become serviceable citi¬ zens. An international congress of nearly ■ five hundred physicians lately in session at l’aris was practically unanimous that consumption, or tuberculosis, is con¬ tagious and transmissible between man and beast. There was unanimity also as to the-pnme necessity of boiling milk aed csoking meat well as a preventive of much of the consumption which now a i icts the human race. None of thes9 conclusions are new, but they derive ad¬ ditional force from the unanimity with which they wore declared and accepted as facts well es ablished. T’e ent arrivals from the Hawaiian islands declare that the Government is insolvent, and that nothing can prevent bankruptcy in the near future. The re¬ form Government, which came into power on the downfall of the Gibson Ministry, has simply used any coin in sight to pay current expenses, with no thought of future settlement. The pub¬ lic debt of Hawaii may be put in round numbers at $2,550,000, for which the only security is Crown lands and Gov¬ ernment buildings at Honolulu, which under forced sale would not realize hall this amount. >„ “P’ive million people upon the globe are now dope^ient on the electric cur¬ rent for their da : ly bresd,” so said Mr. W. H. Preece, at the recent meeting of the British Association held at Bath. “Scarcely a week passes," he continued, “without some fresh practical applica- t on of its principles, and we seem to be only on the shore of that sea of economy and beneficence which expands with every new discovery of the properties of electricity, and spreads already beyond the mental grasp vf any one single worker,” And what is in store beyond for man’s research and conquest who shall say? The New York Independent presents its annual statistical exhibit of the vari¬ ous churches} in this country, compiled mostly from official sources. The follow¬ ing is a general summary by denomina¬ tional groups; CIS. Kin. con. Adventists........ 1,563 S55 100,441 baptists............ 45,434 30,998 3,971,685 Christian Union... 1,500 500 120,000 CongrY-nationalists 4,404 4,090 457,584 Friends ............ 700 500 JOT,968 German Evange’i.. 675 500 125,008 Lutherans.. 7,902 4,215 987,000 Mennonites. 385 005 93,000 Methodists. ...48,258 28,313 4,690,529 Moravians.. 94 108 10,936 New Jernsal em. 95 101 5,750 Presbyterians.. Eposeopaliaus.. 13,057 9,586 1,136,635 416,785 4.706 3,931 Reformed. 2,025 1,345 269,523 Roman Catholics „ 6,839 5,596 7,200,000 Unitarians.. 375 -488 20,000 L'mversalists 730 C77 37,807 Grand total.. 138,885 94,457 19,799,328 The net gain for the year was 6434 churches, 4505 ministers and 774,681 communicants. By far the heaviest gain " among the Baptists—4587 churches at >d 3103 ministers. The Methodists, ^ith isters their 48,285 churches, 28,318 min- and 4,699,529 communicants, stand at *he head of the denominations, the f oman Catholics come next, and then •he Baptists, Presbyterians, Lutherans, Congregationalists and Episcopalians. IT I 1,' WADT VV UII.L.U l\ 0\ Arrn ElV. interesting items boiled DOWN IN READABLE STYLE 1 HE FIELD OF LABOn—SEETHING CAUL¬ DRON OF EUROPEAN INTSIOUB—FIRES, SUICIDES, ETC.—NOTED DEAD. Admiral Baldwin d i°d in New BrotherWs cotton mill, at Preston, Loss England, $200,000. has been destroyed by fire. An explosion of fire damp occurred in Frederick Pit, at Dury, in the province of Haimite, Belgium, Thirty mineri were killed. ialfa Messengers who have arrived at Wadi report that the mysterious Whits asliu in Bahort Gahzi district has fought 1 great battle and killed many dervishes. The yellow lever has broken out at Santa Cruz de la Palma, Spain, The sontagion was carried 10 the port by a iteamer from Cuba, The masters of the colliers in Lauark- mire, , England, have made idvance a 5 per cent in wages. The trade committee has advised the jute spinners of Dundee to give their employes a similar increase. The police have expelled from Berlin wo French journalists, M. Latapan and II. Ooriot, editors of Berlin correspond- ?nce with French newspapers. The offi¬ cial reason given fur their expulsion is that they made themselves obnoxious. Fred S. Simpson, night clerk of the Northern ^ Park Exchange Co., atLacona, W. T., who absconded with $12,000 of the company’s money a few days ago, the was caught at Manloops, B. C., and all money recovered. Hughes county, Dakota, has a genuine pase of ie prosy. The subject is a child pf missionary Mrs. Bansum, in Ctiiua. born while she was a The neighbors re¬ fuse to have communication with mem¬ bers of the afflicted family. Three young girls, Mamie Tann, AUie fiedman and Emma Nickens, while pass¬ ing over the canal bridge at Circleville, Ohio, were caught by a train of cars on the Cincinnati and Muskingum Valley Railroad and killed. The stage, near San Luis Obispo, Cal., he was stopped by a lone highwayman, and went through four passengers. He took all the registered mail matter. Re is thought to be the same man that rob¬ bed two stages last week. The British steamer Black Watch fouudered in latitude 36 north, longitude 19 east. The fate of her crew is un¬ known. She was an iron screw steamer of 936 tons, plying between Naples and Odessa, and was probably returning from Odessa when foundered. A shock of earthquake sharp enough to cause many people in hotels and private houses to run out into the streets, was felt at San Francisco, Cal., on Sunday afternoon. The direction was northwest to southeast; duration ten seconds. The shock was felt throughout Central California. Two lighters, Mary Hand and Charles Whitney, loaded with 800 bales of cot¬ ton, intended for the Hamburg line of steamers, took tire in New York harbor and were towed out into the East river. Before the flames could be extinguished, about $5,000 damage was done. As a result of an improvement in tbe iron trade, the Reading Railroad Compa¬ ny on Wednesday issued orders for a re¬ sumption of work at its large furnace at Bechtelsville, which has been idle for some months. The other company fur¬ naces will resume as fast as they can be repaired. The Glendale rolling mill, a few miles away, also resumed. Treasurer James J. Daily, of the Childs-Drexel fund of the International Typographical Union reports that up to Nov.! the amount on hand was $20,000, which more than doubles the amount of the original gift of $10,000 by Childs & Drexel in 18»6, and which was the nucleus of the fund named in their honor. The entire fund is drawing a good rate of interest. The strike of the Louisville, New Al¬ bany & Chicago brakemen continues, and no freight has been moved into, or out of LaFayette. The company, on Wednes¬ day, made up a train at LaFayette, which was moved under protection of the sheriff and police, and without brake- men to a station ten miles out, where it was side-tracked. The strikers endeav¬ ored to board the cars, and draw the coupling pins, but were prevented. The biggest check that even Wall street has seen for a long time, was drawn Thursday to the order of tho Central Trust company of New York, aud signed by President John II. Inman, of the Richmond Terminal company. T he- check was for $3,950,000, which, with $250 000 previously paid, makes the en¬ tire $4,200,000 that the Terminal com¬ pany bargained a few weeks ago to pay for the Georgia company. appointed last Spring The commission removing the South- will be successful in ern Utes from Colorado. Two weeks ho- 0 the commissioners and a delegation of the Utes appointed for the purpose re¬ turned from Utah, where they went to look up the new reservation. The coun¬ cil was held at the agency on Wednesday and all the Indians present—-one-fourth providing of the tribe-signed the treaty for the removal to a new reservation in Utah. Port-au-Pnnce, . • The prize court of Hayti, after trial, has condemned the American steamer Ilaytien Republic to confiscation for violating tbe blockade of the Port of St. Marc aud for actively steamship Boston has arrived at Port-au- prince, "where her commander is assisting the United States minister in investigat¬ ing the case. After seventv-three weeks of impris¬ onment in the county jail, Edward Mc¬ Donald, of Chicago, III., walked out of the criminal court a free man, under $10 000 bail. His ride down Clark street partook of the nature of an exile’s return. Long imprisonment in jail has not les¬ sened, apparently, the number of his friends. One of the attorneys of the so- called “boodlers” said: “McGaugle, who away, can now come 1 ar.i tc ran hands with Sheriff Mat- Chicago, shake and walk out son, spend ten days in jail e Iranian. ELLAYILLE, GEORGIA. THURSDAY. NOVEMBER 22. 1888. WASHINGTON NEWS. WHAT THE UNITED STATES OF¬ FICIALS ARE DOING. $10,000 Secretary Fairchild has decided to pay for Ilughoimer’s lot iu Charles¬ ton to facilitate the construction of the new postoffice. Y Representative Perry Balmont of New ork, has been tendered aud lias aceep- ted an appointment as United States min- ister to Spain, to succeed J. L. M. Curry, Flora Schmidt, the young woman who wus taken to Bellevue hospital. New York, with symptoms of yellow fever died at that institution. The light house hoard in its annual re- Port to the Secretary of the Treasury ha* recommended tho establishment of sev- eral new light stations in Charleston bar- ta '“ a lhe 8 ““"; burgeon Martin, at Gainesville, P la., telegraphs to Surgeon-General Hamilton that there is one new case (white) in that city and suggests the withdrawal of hold guards, as the fever has gained a foot- in all quarters of that city. He also says that great destitution prevails. T. S. Riley, chairman of the Demo- cratic state committee of West Virginia, has sent tho following dispatch to the Washington Post: “Wheeling, W. Va. —Official returns irom this state are sufficiently ascertained to warrant the announcement of the election of Jud>re A. B. Fleming, Democrat candidate for governor, The by a small but sure majority. rest of the State ticket elected by larger majorities. The Legislature will stand on joint ballot, 46 Democrats, 44 Republicans and " one labor union inde- pendent.” Some crooked business hus been dis¬ covered in connection with the transfer of silver dollars from the mint at New Orleans, La., to Washington, for storage in the new vault iu the court yard of the treasury loss building, which lias resulted in a of $1,500. From one box an en¬ tire sack of dollars had been abstracted and sacks of Nos. 4 and 6 shot substi tuted to give it weight. From another box half of the contents of one sack bad been taken and pieces of lead substituted. The broken seals on the boxes were patched up with impressions of a silver quarter. Gov. Swineford, of Alaska, in his an¬ nual report to the Secretary of the Interi¬ or, states that the white population hat greatly increased, and he estimates that there are 25,000 natives. The total ulation is 49,850, and of this numbc-i there are 6,500 whites, 1,900 Creoles and 2,950 Aleuts. He says that the climate is favorable and the soil rich. He sees no reason why Alaska may not ultimately rival Montana and Wyoming as a cattle country. Promising silver discoveries have been made. The government thinks that there is enough coal the in the territory to supply the whole of United States for centuries. The me Supreme r Court 1 . of t the 41 . United tt -i i States, through Chief Justice Fuller, ban rendered an opinion of unusual interest to holders of life insurance pollen s. Thomas L. Hume of the District of Col- umhia, died m 1881..totally insolvent, but either Spoils to the widow children of the or deceased. The administrators and cred¬ itors of Hume's estate sought to force the application of the proceeds of the poli- ries to the payment of debts due credit- ers. The Supreme Court holds that (he beneficiaries are entitled to the proceeds of all policies, and that where such poh- cies are effected in the name of bench- ciaries, they are no part of estate of the deceased, The military court of inquiry into the acqueduct tunnel scandal developed some very interesting testimony. Frank Thompson, a bricklayer on tho tunnel, tisrified that incompetent men were em- the ployed and they were hurried so by sub-contractors, that i|p was impossible that the work could be good. The con- epiracy was thoroughly organized, and its object was to deceive the government inspectors. A great deal of bad work was done at night, when nobody but the sub-contractors was ever around. Civil Engineer George H. Coryell, who was at one time employed on the work, testified that the masonry lining was, in his opin¬ ion, too weak to withstand the pressure that would be put upon it. He con- deinned the whole scheme for the work, and declared that the tunnel was nothing more that an expensive hole. YELLOW FEVER. Jacksonville, Fla., had 12 new cases is fever on Sunday. The city proper of comparatively free from yellow fever. The suburbs develop most of the new cases. The fever has appeared in viru¬ lent form in South Jacksonville, across the St. John’s river. The natural loca¬ tion is most favorable to the spread of the disease, the land being generally low, and, to a great extent, marshy and wet, and a number of yards being partially covered with tide water. At n meeting of the relief authorities a resolution was adopted to allow the Howard Association, of Fernandina, to draw on them for $3,- 000. No further aid could be extended to that city. Surgeon Martin reports five new cases at Gainesville, Fla. Mon¬ ey is badly needed, ’ Surgeon Martin is greatly overworked as the fever in .Teases, but stands up manfully. ROUGH TIME. Tbe Cunarder Etruria, which arrived in New Y r ork on Sunday from Europe, experienced one of the worst passages in her history. A tidal wave swept ovei the big steamer aud George Warnold, a sailor, was killed. Her record include* five more or less severely injured. The passengers were terribly shaken up. The Bailors saw a mountain of water approach¬ safety, ing. Terrified they scrambled for but with irresistible force, the green wa¬ ters curled over aud fell upon tbe tbe big steamer. Like logs the five sailors were jammed in a heap against the deck house. A LIGHT VOTE. Mrs. Cynthia Leonard, mother of Lil¬ lian Russell, the singer, candidate for th« equal rights party for the myorality ! eight in New York, received a total 0 vote#. HAD A GOOD TIME. The Georgia Weekly Press Jfssocia- lion, under the leadership of B. P. Perry, of tho Canton Admire, held an ad¬ journed meeting at tho Augusta Exposi¬ tion. Tho party mustered about 25 strong, and several young ladies were included in the delegation. The party W !iS treated royally by the people of Au¬ gusta, especially by Ilou. Patrick Walsh, of the Augusta Chronicle, nud Editor Gibson, of the Evening AVim, and culo- g is tic resolutions were officially for- warded to these gentlemen. A banquet was tendered, aud was a grand idT.tir. The AsBOciation donated $20 to the Mnr- t ‘ n * und * or tBe Bem ' dt of the family of the noble hero of the Time*- Union of ^ {“JIj' le ’ J, 1 *” “f 1 ° fficiall >’ s,lt do ™ n “" Vw . P °* suitnblo t,0n ’ man rec- i 1 The general opinion was expressed that the Exposition was a surce s and far in advance of the one held in Atlanta a year ago. The railroad facilities were simply perfect between the city and tho grounds, A SMALL WAR, ~ P hen tho r ecent elect 'on . in the Chickasaw Nation . was held, Governor Cuy was elected on the face of the re- hirhs, but V> llliam Byrd, his opponent, who was in control at the capital, threw onough votes to secure a small nia- jtrrity, and the Speaker of the House swore in B J rd c *Ued the legist n- ture together and put the capitol build- 1D S llnder guard. Guy, with fifty fol- lowers, marched < into lishomingo and took possession. He called his legisla¬ ture and was sworn in. Then he went to Washington, laid the facts before the interior department and was recognized as governor and told to call on the United States troops for assistance if nc- cessary. Each has a force of about 200 men, and the excitement Is intense. Guy’s life has been attempted several times, but he still travels alone, refusing to incur the expense of a body guard. He is waiting now for the time given Bytd’s men to expire, when, he declares, he will kill or capture all who resist or die himself. SUSPECTED. John Van Korff, engineer at the Steam Gauge and Lantern works, at Rochester, N. Y., was arrested by Chief Detective Hannan and Assistants McCormick and Naight on suspicion of setting fire 1° the works Friday night, in which thirty-seven persons lost their lives. Van Korff is forty-five, years old and ‘has a wife and six children. Some years ago bo was abraketoantm the Buffalo, New Yora & Plnlade phia Railroad, and was suspected of ha ving set fire to loaded freight building cars. Later B'oadway lie was in engineer that city, at a on Three times while he was in charge the building £ was on fire, ’ and on the third it wfl8 bur ned down Before u Van Korfi worked in Moore’s sash d bjind fact J a9 e ineer This was burn twice while he was , m B , > , in it when Gould , g / groc , ry / gfco Trowbrid gtreet and e8t a — discover — ‘—A it. *•*■* to BANDIT KILLED. The notorious Kep Queen, from Texas, was kil | ed ne ., r (;i ara more, in the Che¬ rokoc Nation, on Sunday, by the district fber jff Ed Sanders, and posse. A week Qr more ago it became known that Queen ^ some of his outlsw followers were iu ^ bc vieinity, and they were finally lo- ca ted in a cabin about a mile from the p> 0 g Creek court house. That night the 8 ht riff made up a party, and, going to place, they secreted themselves abo ut the premises. Three men then ca me out and mounted, and as they were riding away, were called upon to halt, jjjo answer was a pistol shot, which was returned by a vollev from the officers, Queen went down, mortally wounded, and one 0 f b j s companions was unhorsed, Rewards are standing in Texas for Queen’s capture, dead or alive. Tho cisco and other bank robberies are laid a { Queen’s door. SEVEN KILLED. Limited express train No. 5, coming west on the Baltimore & Ohio road, ran into an open switch at Valley Fails, ninety-three miles east of Wheeling, W. Vn., aud collided with the engine of an cast bound freight which I vy on and the John sid¬ ing. Ed Dwyer, the engineer, Sty, tiie fireman of the passenger train, both residents of Wheeling, Clerk were in¬ oi stantly killed. Postal Hall, Woodsiield, Ohio; William Clinton, en¬ gineer of the freight ttaiu, and a brake- man named Conley, were also killed. Two unknown men, tramps, who were stealing a ride on the freight train, were found dead in the wreck. Clerk Scott, of the postal cat, escaped through a win¬ bad dow with no worse injuries than cuts about the face and head. 8TRIKE THREATENED. A general strike against a re-arrange- ment of working hours is threatened by tbe iron workeis of Pittsburg, Pa. On account of (he shoitage of natural gas during have the daytime, the gas companies requested hours mill owners the heaviest to arrange working so that order work will be done at night, in that the consumption of gas can be made more uniform. the change, The manufacturers their employes agreed to but at meet¬ ings ot the various amalgamated lodges throughout the city on Wednesday re¬ in solved to strike against any change “turns.” - _ ENGLISH ONLY. petition A dispatch bad been from presented Rome slates to the that Prop¬ a aganda influence protesting of against German the Catholics predomi¬ in nating Archbishop Ireland, America, and seven Catholic bishops made a request that the catechism shall be taught only in the English language, and that in Ger¬ man parishes, where sermons were here¬ tofore preached in German, they should now be preached in English, and that no more festivities of any German nature should be tolerated; in short, that every¬ thing German should h? abolished. SOUTHERN STRAYS. A CONDENSATION OF HAPPEN¬ INGS STRUNG TOGETHER. MOVEMENTS OF ALLIANCE MEN—RAIL¬ ROAD CASUALTIES—THE COTTON CROP —FLOODS—ACCIDENTS—CROP RETURNS, ALABAMA. The safe io the county treasurer’s of¬ fice, at Carrollton, Pickens county, was blown open. The noise of the explosion v va used several people living near by and ho burglars fled without securing any joodlo. arkanhass. The long and tedious con tent ion between the Beil and Fan Electric Telephone com¬ panies was brought to a close in Little Rock, by tho destruction of the Pan Electric instruments by order of the Fed¬ eral court. Twelve hundred aud twinty- nine instruments were collected and cou- veyid to tho suburbs of the city and burned. The bonfire consumed property to the value o( $15,000, for which the investors got no returns whatever. GEORGIA. Christopliine, an Italian fruit vender in Atlanta, who was assaulted last Monday night by three young men, died of his injuries on Thursday. Hon. Jnmes Hunt, a member of the Georgia Legislature, was killed in At¬ lanta, Thursday night, by Sully Moore, a mail agent on the Western & Atlantic Railroad. The two men wero old * liends. N. B. Baum & Bro., of Toombsboro, $100,090 lave failed, with $125,000. liabilities Savannah ranging from firm to A ■ >f cotton factors lose over $50,000. Baum & Bros., did a large general merchandt-e business in Wilkinson and several neigh¬ boring counties, They operated three -tores, one each in Toombsboro, Irwin- ton aud Dublin. NORTH CAROLINA. An attachment against the property of the favor Bank of of Arthur Durham, has been granted in C. Elliott, of New York, in n suit for $5,984. There was a business crash in Durham on Thursday hitherto unequalled in the business history of North Carolina. Six firms made assignments almost simul¬ taneously. The firms assigning are; W. 1’. Blackwell, president and owner of the bank at Durham, $400,000; E. J. Parish, $190,000; W. F. Ellis, $23,000; Muse & Shaw, $10,000; Robbins & Stone, $8,000; J. W. B1 ck well, $110,000. The aggre¬ gate liabilities will approximate $1,000,- O00. Assets are not known yet. SOUTH CAROLINA. The British steamer Sandringham, loaded with ootton at Charleston lor ltevid, was found to he on fire in the forward hold, and wi g nearly destroyed ou Sunday night. Gn at preparations were made for the gala week wnicb. begins in Charleston, •4. C. Amusements include fireworks, naval sham battles, prize drills, balloon ascensions, trades display, torchlight procession, fantastic parade, prize shoot- ug, lawn tennis tournament, racing daily i.ndan illumination of forts and Charles¬ ton harbor. There is danger of a serious riot in Beaufort between the negroes. Ex- Congressman Robert Smalls ran for slier- dF and was defeated. He then became . i isgusted, and it is said assisted in hav¬ ing a split ticket put up against the Re¬ publican ticket for county officers and 1 epresentatives. Serious trouble is ap- pri handed at any moment, and, acting under the order of Governor Richardson, Adjutunt-Generd Bonham has ordered u battalion of infantry to arms, and they are now awaiting orders. VIRGINIA. William R. Shipe, a young man 23 years of age, committed suicide on Sun¬ day at Richmond, by shooting himseii through tiie head with a pistol at St. Jnmes Hotel. He is said to Vie a Vh- giuian, a resident of Brooklyn, N. Y., aud traveling salesman for tho shoe house of Pollock & Co., Baltimore, Md. DISCOURAGING. In view of the great falling of! in the ^Membership und the debt which is hang¬ ing over the Ordor, the delegates to the KLuights of Labor Convention are now feeling rather blue and wondering what the outcome will be. At the end of June 1887, tile order was $5,972 ahead. Of its condition one year later the balance was $164, with bills to the amount of $9,227 due and unpaid ; October 21, 1888, there was a cash balance of $40, with $2,887 due and unpaid bills. OFF FOR ENGLAND. Empress Victoria (tho widow of Em¬ peror Frederick), and her daughter! started for England on Sunday. They were escorted to tho railway station by the emperor. The parting between the emperor and his mother was very touch¬ ing. He kissed and embraced her severul times. The party met the prince of Wales at Flushing, and embarked on the royal yacht which started for England. GRAND 'NCREA8E. Treasurer Jss. G. Daily, of the Childs-Drexel fund, at Typographical Philadelphia, Pa., of the International U nion, reports that up to November 1st, the amount on hirad was $20,333, which more than doubles the amount of tho original gift of $15,000 by Childs and Drexel in 1886, and which was the nu¬ cleus of the fund liatned in their honor. LOST MONEY, The central exposition commission¬ ers of Cincinnati, O., read their report in a general way. They fixed the assessment to be paid by the guarantees of the exposition funds at thirty-five per cent, ff’hc guarantee fund ■was $1,000,000, and the assessment will be $360,00(1 SCHUR2 HONORED. A grand farewell was given on Tues¬ day to Gen. Carl Schurz on the occasion of bis departure from Hamburg for the United States. The Prussian minister, Yon Kusserow, president and of the other senate, dis¬ the board of trade many tinguished pmous, accompanied Schurz to the skewer. BUDGET OF FUN. Humorous rkktchim from various SOURCES. A11 Autumnal Idyl— Then Ton'll Remember Mo—A Precaution¬ ary Measure—A Creature of llabit, Etc., Etc. The roses from tho wild rose-trees Upon the gra^s are falling, And geese in happy argosies Fly southward, wildly csllirg. Upon The the squirrels top rail madly of tho chatter, fence And in the forest, deep and donsa, The chestnuts gaily patter; And "Mary .lano will when* soon commence batter. To make the buck Then You'll Remember Mo. Restaurant Waiter (to departing him cus¬ tho tomer who has failed to givo accustomed tip) —“You’ll not forget me, will you?" Miserly Party—“No, indeed. I’ll write you a letter when I get home."— Siftings. A Precautionary Measure. Enamored Youth — “Your father treats me with the most distinguished night called consid¬ eration. The other he to me as I was leaving and reminded mo 1 was forgetting my umbrella.” afraid Sweet Girl—“Yes, papa was the you would bo coming back after it next evening."— Philadelphia Record. A Creature of Habit. :*» r «*• •»* '“*■«*” sJi'iffir** ,h “‘ b " u, "" g “Because, you see, I bought this horse from the street railroad company and ho won’t move unless I ring 0 a bell."- Fhegende E,,- >. Blatter. r- Not Due to Success. First Poetical Aspirant (to second ditto)—“So you say you sent off more than a hundred poems and never had ono returned?” Second P. A.—“That’s what 1 said.” First P. A.—“It’s a phenomenal suc¬ cess! I wish I knew the secret." Second P. A.—“Well, I’ve sometimes thought it was because I never enclosed postage stamps."— Life. He Diked to lie Accurate. The farmer’s wife ran out to the road and looked up and down. A tramp was shuttling along, when she hailed him. “I say, did you see any cows iu the corn in that corner lot?" “No, ma’am,” ha replied as he in lifted his hat, “I didn’t see any cows the corn, but I did see some of the corn go¬ ing into the cows at —” But she was off .—IA is. , Didn’t Hocogni/.e the Bivalves. Mr. Byam Kegs (from Kalamazoo, with 11 intense disgust). — “Here, waiter, ordered raw oysters. What ozi airth are these nasty black stones! Waiter (petrified)—“Oystahs, suh— on de hail-shell, sah!” " Mr. Byam Keggs—“Ilaff-shell, is it? Oh, git out! Pvo eat a million canned oysters out home, anil never saw a shell on ary one of them I” Careful of His Mind. Woman (to tramp)—“I s’pose you’ve traveled a good'deal in this country?” of it, Tramp- “I know every toot Ma’am, from Portland, Maino, to the llio Grande.” Woman—“Don’t ye git tired 0 ’travel- in’ sometimes?” Tramp—“Occasionally, Ma’am, I am oppressed with more or less ennui : still, there’s nothing like travtd, you know, to broaden one’s mind.”— Tm Epoch. ’ Two Pictures. In Courtship—“What makes the stars so dim to-night?” she asked. bright they “Your eyes are so out¬ shine them,” hand. he said, as he tenderly pressed After her Marriage —“I wonder how many telegraph poles it would take to reach from her# to the moon?” she said, musingly. if it long enough,” he “One, was snapped; “why can’t you talk sense?” —Boston Courier. What Can He Tell Pa? Clara (shyly)—“You will have to gain papa’s consent first, Mr. Sampson, ere I give you my answer. ” Mr. Sampson (heart throbbing with hope)—“Can I see him at once, dear Clara?" “I think so, Mr. Sampson; and papa is so absurdly practical, ho may ask somo foolish questions.” What will he ask? He may want to know how much you are worth, and oh, Mr. f ampson—George (and the name dropped so tell sweetly him?— from her lips)—what will you Sift¬ ings. Learning to Shop. Pretty Miss~“ilave you any plows?." Jeweler—“i’lows?” “Yes, or harrows!” “Yes, or rakes, or hoes, or mowing machines—” “See here, my little miss, you seem to he out of your bead, and I don’t know but may be I ought to call a doctor or policeman “Oh, or-” me! Don’t do that! My head mercy wanted is all right. You see, I to go shopping and as I had not any money ma told me to bo careful not to ask for anything the store 1 went into wus likely ‘.0 have in slock. ”—Philadelphia Record, Food for a lover. lie—“Amanda, this is the neat little restaurant where I have those delicious lunches 1 have mentioned to you but could not describe, and this is Tom, the waiter who serves me my favorite dishes so nicely, Adolphus." 8he-»-“Howsweet, order, Amanda? He—“What will you They have birds, oysters, and all tiie delicacies of the season. ” 8he—“Your favorite dish, Adolphus, of course. Waiter, you may fetch Mr. Wigwag’s favorite order, which he says you serve so nicely." (giving Waiter—“Yes, ladv” “Draw one in de dark. Soused pigs’feet on de Iron .”—Niw York Sun. Vanquished. “You malicious nuisance 1” exclaimed Jiff » VOL. IV, NO. 9. tho angry business maq, “you h*ve been here every day for the last six month*. How many more time* do you need to be told that I never buy anything of* f peddler*?” “I carrying orft the wishes _ of my **i a am late father, sir,” said the peddler. “He railed on you 3!(* times without «f«r making a sale and tiion turned the job over to me. He dmd of a broken heart, sir, and 1 am fast breaking down, but I have a son who -.—” “I surrender,” said the business man, brokenly. “I don’t want the blood of three generations on my head. I’ll take your entire stock if you quit and sail it square.”— Chicago Tribune. / A Moan Trick. Gus De Smith has been engaged far to he s number of young ladies, but thus lias never married any of them. Besides being a gay Lothario, Gus is also a pout. "On meeting a friend recently Gus re¬ marked: engaged “Did you bear that I was again?” “You don’t tell ? When.areyou me 10 going to get married?” “I didn’t say that I was going to get married. I am only engaged." lady’s name?” “What is tho young “Her name is Lucy. Two other young ladies to whom I was why*-, engaged engaged were named Lucy. That’s 4 myself to this last girl. I can use on this present Lucy the sonnets and love- letters I used on tho other two. See?” — Siftings. A Pointed Reply. After the downfall of Napoleon in a'vsijrrs ass r»°A p .oV™n™ Tho ^em payments for the were to be made ““Kj m 1316 ?* a gold, but as the French were unable to raise the amount in gold, tho Allies baa of to be 8atisned with silver in payment the other installment. naturally The people of Paris wero very much interested, and took having no pains to conceal thoir anguish at to part with their gold and silver coin. The subject was under discussion one day in the salon of Madame de Stael. A young German officer who being was present protested against the Allies com¬ pelled to take the inferior metal in pay¬ ment. «t You had better be satisfied," inter¬ the rupted Madame de Stael; “wo paid in first installment in gold, the second silver, and, if pressed too closely, we might pay the third in iron." “Very well, Madame," replied the German officer, calmly; “you can if pay the third installment in iron, you ! choose, but if you try it we will give you a receipt in full in lead ” ^ Penelope’s Words of Comfort. “j enelopc, can’t you say something to soften the blow?” implored the young man. canlsay? “.)li, Philip, Philip! Vthat It is all over between us.” “That doesn’t soften it suid any,” rejoined Philip; “that’s what you before.” And the unhappy youth looked mourn- fully at a ten dollar volmno of poems he had presented her a few months before, and heaved a sigh his so shoes deep, perceptibly so pro- found, that it made tighter. “Penelope,” he continued, “when a young man builds ali his hopes on the promise of a young womap and that young woman deliberately goes back on that promise, it knocks the props, as it were, out from under his hopes, and they come down, kerswash! You may have a perception sometime, Penelope,” “of ho added with increasing gloom, standing the feelings of a human being by a wreck of this kind happiness.” aud “looking at the debris of his own “I couldn’t help it, Philip,” she re¬ plied. “I have become satisfied that we were not made for each other. We should not be ha ppy together. We”-- he “Is it because i am a mugwump?” demanded. “No, Philip, it is not that, I think, with proper nursing, you would recover from that in time. Neither have I any objection to your personal appearance,; hah-’ your position in society, your its”_ not. “My Penelope habits!” Witherspoon, he ejaculated. I “I hopoj in never my life took a drink of anything tobacco, intox-j ieating, never chewed never; smoked and a cigar, in never ballroom. went to a I circus,j don’t; never was a drink tea or coffee, eat peatnuts, chew! gum, read novels, swear, gamble, lie,: atj use snuff, play checkers, sit up late night, go to theati%s, eat between meals, ; nor rea.d Amelie Hives. I never kissed a young womau in my life”-- “As far as ray experience goes,” “I as¬ serted Penelope, retrospectively, “Philip,” van she certify that you have not. added, with a glow of tender womanly sympathy on her face, “you asked me to say something to soften the blow. I think I t an foresee a great future for you. Y’our habits have fitted you for a shin¬ ing career.’’ “In what capacity, may I ask?” “As a $50O-a-week freak in a dime museum.— Chicago Tribune. Squirrel Skins mid the Weather. Tacked upon the wall in one corner of mv room are three native gray that squirrel skins. The agile chatterers wera once within these soft jackets were shot last October in the Maine woods, and theil furs were tinned aud sent to me at the same time by an enthusiastic sportsman of my acquaintance. The ordinary way in which ihese merely skins are tacking preserved them in tbe country, is by upon a good broad shingle, sprinkling a little 8a j t ovcr them and then setting aside for a week to dry. F’or almost a year now have these furs been upon my wall in a soft, pliant and dry condition, though, as they should be. Last Tuesday, when the atmosphere was so’ excessively sat- united with moisture I found them soak- i D g We t,withgreatbeadsofwaterdistrib- The salt with u ted over the sui face. which they were withstand permeated, the humidity had simply in been unable to the air, and bad, of a consequence, been dissolved by it. If squirrel skins provo to be such an accurate register be of atmos- bad pheric moisture, it might Service not Bureau a idea for the Signal to adopt them henceforth as standard hy- grometers.or at least to use them in con* nection with their other instruments. dition My skins, again as .’’—New I write, Y.ni are Jn^ Xeu>.<. normal con- Tho skin of murderers, tauued, ha* been used to hind books in England. ■ ■'......