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S'fe?
V s O.L. IV.
Advertising Kates.
One squnre, first itwerlton...... $ 75
Each subsequent insertion 50
One square tiiree months 5 00
One square six months ». Ift 00
Oie aqu'ire iwc!\e months 15 00
Quarter column twelve months... 30 00
Half,column six months 40 no
Half column twrlve months 00 00
One column twelve months 100 00
JSj>3*-Ten lines or less considered a square,
All fractious of squares are counted as full
squares,
wKwsrepxa dkoistonb.
1. Any person who takes a paper regu
larly from the post office—whether directed
tin hy» ijg»ne 9r another’s, nr whether he ha®
suha' , -’ v 9.1 or not—is responsible (or the
pavment.
2- If « person or-leis his pspoj discontin
ued, he must pay all arrearages, or the pub
lisher may continue to spnd it until payment
is made, and collect the whole amount,
shot her the paper Is taken From the office or
n >t.
3. The conrtO.ave deeidpd that refusin'?
t<» take newspapers and periodicals from the
postoffice, or removing and leaving them un
called for, is pnma facie evidence of intern
t tonal fraud.
TOWN DIRECTORY.
M ator —Thoms* G. Barneit.
{Nmimissionkr*—B B. Bivm*, F; R.
Junto, G. P. Bivin*. W. B. Pierce.
C'i.brk —<4. P. Bivins.
Trra*i?rrr —W. S. Shell.
MaRSHai.B— S. A. BelHinp, Marshal.
B. H. McKneely, Deputy.
JUDICIARY.
A. M. Sriow, - Judge.
F. D. Dirmukk, - - Solicitor Genera!.
Butt*—Second Mondays in March and
September
Hmry—Tlnrd Mondays in January and
July.
Monroe—Fourth Mondays in February,
and August.
Newton—Third Mondays in March and
September.
I’ike—First Mondays in April and Octo
ber.
Rockdale—Third Mondays in February and
and An? nst.
Spalding—First Mondays in February
and Ausurst.
Upson First Mondays in May and No
member.
CHURCH DIRECTORY.
Mkthodist Episcopal Church, (Sonth.)
Rev. Wesley F, .Smith. Pastor Fonrth
Sabbath in each month. Sunday-school 3
r. m. Prayer meeting Wednesday evening
Christian Church, W. S. Fears, Pastor.
Second Sabbath in each month.
Baptist Church. Rev. J. P. I. von. Pus
tor. Third Sabbath in each month.
DOCTORS
BR. J. C.TIJRMPSEED will attend to
all calls day or night. Office a resi
dence. Hampton, Ua.
f\R. W. H PEEBLES treat* all dis
* ' eases, and will attend to all calls day
and uigbt. Office at the Drug Store,
Broad Street, Hampton, Oa.
fkk mi.i,.
K«jh visit, in day *3l.
R ich visit,'in night, s2f '' *
M ileage, in d «y. 50c.
Mdeago, in night, SI.
Prescription. SI.
Obstetrics, from $lO to SIOO.
Consultation. $lO.
T\ T {. D. F. KNOT!’ having permanently
M located in Hampton, offers his profes
sorial service* to the citizens of Hampton
and vicinity. Ail orders left at Mclntosh’s
store will receive prompt attention. sp26
DR. N. T.’BARNETT tenders his profes
sional services lo the citizens of Henry
and adjoining counties, and will answer calls
day or night. Trents all diseases, of what
ever nature. Office at Nipper’s Drug Store.
Hampton, Ga. Night calls can be made at
ray residence, opposite Berea church. apr26
T F PONDKR, Dentist, has located in
’J • Hampton. Gtt.,and invites the public to
call at his room, upstairs in the Bivins
House, where he will be found at all hours.
Warrants alt work for twelve montb6.
LA WY ERS
CW. HODNEIT, Attorney and Conn
• seller at Law, Jonesboro, Ga. Prompt
attention given to all business.
r p C- NOLAN Attorney at Law, Me
• Donough, Georgia. Will practice in
he counties composing the Flint Circuit ;
the Supreme Court of Georgia, and the
Juired States District Court.
WM.T. DICKEN, Attorney at r,aw, Me
Donough, Ga. Will practice in the
•oenties composing the Flint Judicial Cir
. the Supreme Court of Georgia, and the
ed States District Court. (Office np
j i over W. C. Sloan’s.) apr27-ly
/ J. M. NOLAN. Attorney at Law.
dpDonough.Ga. (Office in Court bouse)
I practice in Henry and adjoining coun
\ and in the Supreme and District Courts
Georgia. Prompt attention given to eol
0' ons. roch23-6m
F. W ALL..Attorney at Law, A/amp»
. ion,Ga Will practice in the counties
co osing the Flint Judicia! Circuit, and
upreme and District Courts of Georgia
> nt attention given to collection!. ocs
'ARD J. REAGAN, Attorney at
v. Office op stairs in the Mclntosh
>g. Hampton, Ga. Special attention
to commercial and other collections.
1 ' ? . McCOLLUM, Attorney and Coun
sellor at L-*w, Hampton, Ga. Will
* in Henry, Clayton, Fayette, Coweta.
Meriwether, Spalding and Butts Supe
oorts, and in the Supreme and United
Courts. Collecting claims a specialty
uo stairs iu the Mclntosh Buildimr
ONE BY ONE.
One by one earth’s wrongs nre dn’tten,
One by one its errors fa ii;
One by one are eerved and written
Truth’s great triumphs over all
One by one tbe dreary pieces
Glow with green and gnsh with light.
One by one God’s linger traces
Moods and stars upon the night.
One by one are rent ard riven
All the links of bell’s hot gyves.
One by one the chords of heaven
* Gently, strongly clasp par lives.
One by one earth’s bitter weanings
Leave us nearer to the skies.
One by one life’s higher meanings
Break like sunlight on our eyes.
O, the weary months of sorrow !
O, the long and solemn years 1
0. the yearning for the morrow
That should give u« j ry for tears !
0, the nestling heart’s great anguish 1
O, tbe wasting of the frame,
And the love that could not languish,
And the spirit singed with Hamel
Let it pass ; the blessed throbbing
Of tbe purple b 'art of morn
Drew its pulses from the sobbing
Midwigbt, setting in her scorn ;
And the calm soul’s higher thirsting,
And the light of truer eyes—
These are hut the upward bursting
Of tbe seeds of sacrifice.
Therefore, though tbe iron shack le
Clasp and clench the writhing spheres;
Though the red fires flame and crackle
Through the ghastly shuddering yean ;
Though the green earth weep onshriven.
And thick and mildew blast the sun,
Still shalt all, site men and heaven,
Pass tod perish one by one.
—Richard Realf.
Old Hone-Shoet.
‘•I saw a funny sight in the street jnst
now,” said Mr. Patterson to his friend, Mr.
Johnson, in the Fifth Avenue Hotel barber
shop. New York, recently. “I met an ele
gantly drwaed lady «wi*ying m her band an
old horse-shoe covered with mini. I pre
sume she bul just found it and was carrying
it home for good luck.” “Good lock 1”
replied Mr. Johnson, “don’t talk to me
about old horse-shoes and good lack. About
a mouth ago, my wife and I were returning
from church one Sunday, when, in front of
the pew Roman Catholic church in Fiftieth
a horse which was being driven at a
lively gait, threw a shoe, and it went ring
ing along the pavement. ‘Go get that shoe.’
said my wife, ‘and we will keep it for good
luck.’ 1 picked it np, utterly ruining one
of my gloves in doing so, as it was covered
with mud. This I was going to wipe off od
the curb, but my wife cried out: *Qh, don’t
do that, for if you do you will wipe out all
our luck.' So I lngged the old thing all the
way home, and over the door we hung it,
mud and all. In the morning I went down
lo the store wondering whut my first streak
of good luck would be. Before night I bad
a misunderstanding with my employer—with
whom 1 have been for several years—we
both got hot, and the result was that be
gave me notice that, after the Ist of Jan
uary. be would dispense with my services.
“A few days afterward my wife went to
do a little shopping and lost her pocket book,
containing all the money we bad been suving
for a long time to spend for holiday presents
and amusements. In fact, for about two
weeks, everything seemed to go against me,
and I was in hot water all the time. Finally,
I said to my wife one day that 1 believed it
was that confounded old horse shoe that was
to blame for {toll, and that I was bound to
take it down and put it back in the street
just where I found it, and so I did. The
very neat morning my employer sent for me
to come and see him in bis private off Le.
He said he had been mistaken in the matter
about which we differed, apologized for what
he had said, hoped there would be no bird
feelings about it, and wouod up by engaging
me for another year at an increased salary.
I went home that night feeling better
uatured than I hud for weeks. I told my
wile of my good luck, and then she took
from her pocket a letter which she had that
day received from her father, notifying her
that he was going to send her a check for
SSOO for u Christmas present. In (act, I
liave only good luck since I threw away that
old horse shoe. They may bring lock to
some folks, but my wife and I don’t want
any more horse-shoes in ours, you bet.”
“Can dogs find their way borne from a
longdistance?” asks an exchange. It’s
according to the dog. If it’s one you want
to get rid of, be can find bis way back
home from California. If it’s a good ooe,
he’s apt to get lost if be goes around the
corner
HAMPTON, GEORGIA, FRIDAY, MARCH 5, 1880.
A Marriage Rehearsal.
"T have been a snhscriber for the last ten
years,” said a ' broken up” looking young
man coming into the p-hiiog < iT.cc the other
day. and sitting down in front of the m*n
cging editor, “sod I cal! upon you (or aid
and assistance.”
Tbt editor looksf poin’edly at the clock,
and asked what he could do for the visitor.
"Why, I want you to hold up to public
! =corn aw] detestation a fell '-v call M'Xtney,
mid a mean, red- i>e-tiled girl na tied Morris
sey.” • j ... •«-.
“Scandal case, eh 1”
“A heap sight worse. T m see, l was
engaged to be married to that girl—her
name’s Maria—and Dr Stone was to hitch
us np the first of the month, so I asked this
mean cuss M ioney to be a groomsman.”
“He consented, of course?”
"You bet he did Yon see, Mooney has
a big black mustache and—tnd all that ;
nnd he’s a good deal of a ■’masher, as it were.
He said he’d try to make it lively aod pleas
ant for the bridesmaids ”
“And did he?”
“ Why, he actually made love fo all four,
Gol the o'hrr groomsmen furious by flirting
with the whole lot. Told 'em it was the
correct thing in Europe for the groomsmen
to kiss the bridesmaids all abound before and
alter the cerimony, and that they ought to
meet and practice to get the thing in good
running order.”
“Did they practict 7" said the editor, lay
ing down his pen.
“Did they? Why, it was just disgusting
the way they went on every evening. To
see that villian Mooney pretend to steer
down the aisle and back up against the
dbanoel-rail and then, when the m'*ck ner
vine was over, kiss and paw around the girls,
would have made your hair rise a foot. Why,
he began flirting with my Maria—l raeaD
lb«t Morrissey girl."
“Made love to the bride, eh T"
“Exactly ; and she a-letting him do it—
mind you. Well, yesterday they said that
they were going to have a fine rehearsal that
night, and to make the thing more perfect
they inten'ied to get Bings, the young divin
ity student, to read the service And as I
was toing over to Oakland with a. load of
furniture for our new house, Mooney said he
would officiate in my place.”
“That was kind of him."
“But wait a minute. When I got bsek
and called at Maria’s house about 11 p. m., I
found all the party sitting ’round the par'or
and a-looking very serious, except the bride,
who seemed kinder frightened. “Whut is
the trouble?” said I; “what’s happened ?”
“Welt, the fact is," said that cheeky Moo
ney, “there’s b<en the most singular acci
dent, the queerest mistake, you ever heard
of it* your life. You see, we were rehearsing
the service as usual, and 1 was holding Ma
ria’s hind just like this, when young Biogs
got sorter absent minded, so to speak, and
the first thing we knew he pronounced us
man and wife in the regular form, and he
now says we are married in real earnest.
Too bad isn’t it ?"
“Singular mistake," said the editor.
“But the worst of it was the way that
false-hearted Marla took it. She said it
was pretty hard, but whut couldn’t he cured
must be endured, and that she suppos'd
they couldn’t get a divorce under a year,
anyhow, and a lot of stuff like that."
“’Peared resigned to her (ate, os It were,"
“Exactly ; and then Mooney chipped in
with a lot of stoff about not cryiog over
spilt milk, and Baid he’d take the furoitnre
off my hands, and pay for the ring. Baid
he’d give his note for ’em. Cheek? Why,
that man has got more gall than a pawn
broker’s clerk, and I want yon, Mr. Editor,
to show him and bis red-beaded, big-footed
wife op the very worst way. Accident, in
deed 1 Why, it’s the plainest pot up job 1
every saw in the whole course of my life.
Just let ’em have it in italics, if you please,
and I’ll lake 500 extra copies !”
The editor said beM tend to it, am) has
since written to Mr. Mooney to say that a
position as reporter was always open to him
od his go ahead journal.
A i.kctursr was explaining to a little
girl bow a lobster east bis shell when be
had outgrown it. Said he : “What do
yoa do when you have outgrown your
clothes? You cast them aside, do you uot ?’’
“Ob, no,” replied the little one; “we let out
the tucks.”
Modkrn m ddens do not eare as much for
hearts of steel in their wooers as they do for
bulky bank accounts. A big balance on the
right side outweighs tbs rot ire lack of heart
and brain ; a sensible result of firing in a
practical age.
A wkart-ukking West End man calls
his wife’s aunt ooe ol the eternal vigil-
M C«onskin.”
A passenger train which left Lansing
coming East last Monday had among the
passengers a plain-faced, sensible-looking
girl about twenty years of age, and a thin—
twisted, siekly-loolring young man a year or
two older. No or.e would have mistrusted
that they weieelnp'itg Imd not the young
man asked the conductor if there was a
ciargyman on the train. There was none,
ami 'he young man explained to the passen
gers around him that he was in a had fix.
Hr hud eom> down from Bath township in
a boggy, and he was quite sure that the
girl’s father would take the other road down
to (Toicago Junction, and there board the
Lan«ing train aod raise a row He was not
much on a row, but yet he loved the girl,
and they were bound to marry.. If the old
man came alone he thought he could bluff
hint off. but if his two big sons came along
the scale would be turned. He therefore
wanted to know of » mm wearing a red
woolen shirt and connskin cap if he would
stand by him
“You bet l will!” was the hearty re
sponse. "I got my old gal by running away
with her, and I’ll see you through this if I
pever do any more good. You wouldn’t be
worth a cent in a free fight ; and now you
go into the baggage car and let me run this
affair alone. I want to be seated beside the
g«l when the old man comes in.”
When tbe whistle blew for the Juoction
Coonskin changed places, and as the cars
bailed he put his arm around Mary aod took
one of hei hands in his. Tbe old min and
kis two bods were on hand, add they piled in
the car pell mell. *
“Here she is 1" called the father, as he
caught sight of the girl, and the tbrue made
a ru-h.
“Run away with ray”- began the old
man, but when he saw the stranger beside
her he checked himself.
“Want anything of os ?” asked Gooaskin,
ns he looked up.
“Who are yon, sir ?”
“I’m going to lie your son-in law iu lesp
than an hour—eh l darling ?’’
lie gave Mary a -queue and Mary looked
happy.
“Come along, Mary—come right home
with me!” ordered the father.
“Let’s mash the villain I" addl’d one of the
sens.
“Put a head on him —let mo get at him I”
shouted the other.
The father seized Mary and the sons seized
C ionskin. Then a red shirt towered aloft,
a pair of big fists began working with u
“pop 1" ‘ pop J" and ns fast as tbe trio got
np they nude for the door. Coon»kin fol
lowed, arms and feet working Ike n trip
hammer. and when the train moved.off the
father sat on a box with a big woolen mitteu
held to his nose, one of the sous was pulling
loose teeth from his jnw and the Other boy
wag groping hia way to a snow bank.
“Now, then," paid Coonskin, as the ex
nltant lover returned, “resame ycr seat, take
her litt'e hand in yours and don’t ealkorlate
you owe me anything."
“Soy. Tom,” said the girl, “I’m going to
kiss him for that 1”
“All right, sis!"
“Wall, ju j t as you feel," said Coonskin,
as he returned the smack, "tint I want it
distinctly understood aroor.d these parts that
when I see true love on its wny from Linsing
to Howell to get spliced I kin lick all the
pursuing dads in tbe State of Michigan.”—
Detroit Free Press.
Ticari.rss Lunatics.— One of tbe most
carious facts connected with madness is the
otter absence of tears amid the insane
Wbaterer the form of madras*, tears are
conrpicuons by tbeir absence, as much in
the depression of melancholia, or the excite
ment of mania, as in the utter apathy of
dementia. If a patient in a lunatic asylum
be discovered io tears, it is either a patient
beginning to recover or an emotional out
break in an epileptic who is scarcely truly
insane, while actually insane patients appear
to have lost tbe power of weeping ; it is only
returning reason which can once more un
loose tbe fountains ol tbeir tears. Even
when a lunatic is telling one in fervid lan
guage how she was deprived of hpr children,
her eye is never even moist. Tbe ready gusli
of tears which accompanies tbe plaint of tbe
sane woman contrasts with the dry eyes
appeal of the lunatic. It would, indeed,
seem that tears gave relief to feelings which
* hen pent up lead to madness. It is ooe of
tbe privileges of reoaou to be able to weep.
Amid all tbe misery of the insane they can
Sod no relief in tears.
A bio Yankee from Maine, oa paying
bie bill in a London restaurant, was told
that tbe earn pat down didn’t include the
A Biyihelor’s I^eagu**.
Many highly respectable unmarried m“n
in London, about thirty years ag>, its the
Punch files tell us hid become thoroughly
impressed with the idea that something
ought to be done to relievo Ihomrclves from
certain social duties which had been gradu
ally growing more and more onerous.
After some canvassing among the inteiested
persons it was finally decided to form a
League of Bachelors, and ns the members of
that league were endeavoring to escape from
responsibilities which are no'orlously shirk
ed by the young men of to-day, we shall pet-
Imps interest onr feminine readers by tran
sc ihing a few of the rules which were laid
down for a Lond m socialv almost a gener
ation ago, and which aj;e likely to he reviv
ed before long on this side of the water.
1. Every bach 'lor joining the league is
i
to cancel nil previous engagements.
2. Every bachelor having subscribed for
five yenis to the League, and who, by mis
fortune, shall have incurred a matrimonial
engagement, shall be defended against any
action for breach of promise, and thui saved
from the sham' and mi-ery of going through
the Court of Hymen, which is too frequently
another name for the Insolvent Court.
3. Connected with the Leagne it is in
tended to establish a Bachelors' Insurance
Office, to insure single men against marriage
ami flirtation, on the same principles as are
usually applied to death and fire. Any mem
ber having visited wilfully n house with
more than two marriageable daughters will,
in the event of tbe calamity of marriage be*
falling him, be regarded ip the same light as
ftlo dr. k, nnd his policy will be vitiated on
account of the very bad polity that Will
b ve guided him w Aoy bachelor falling—
into matrim my—by hie own boo l, as in the
ease of a written promise to wed. will be
priced of all the benefits of bis iitHurnocfi,
and every applicant proposing to be insured
must aeswer the following questions among
others that will be proposed to him; Wimt
is vonr age next birth day ? At what age
had your father tbe misfortune to marry
your mother? H ive you been afflicted with
the (jerman or other mania ? Are you sub
ject to sentimental fits? Have you been
addicted to the writing of sonnets ? Or have
you ever suffered from the cncoethcs «c abend i
in any shape, or a* any lima whatever ?
Have you at any time in year life been a
victim to the flute, or any other deadly-live
ly instillment 7 Have any of your near re
lations fallen in love at any time, and if so,
have they recovered, or have their ca-es
ended fatally ?
If these questions are all answered in a
satisfactory manner, any member of the
Bachelors’ fjOague may insure for any amount
nnder £5,000, to be paid within tlueo months
after the melancholy terrnina'ion of hip sin
gle career, on prool of wedlock having actu
ally overtaken him. The insurance against
flirtation or fire cannot be effected where the
applicant is more thin ordinarily inflamma
ble, and watering placi’S in the seasons, balls,
and picnic parties must bo considered as
doubly or trebly haz irdous, and charged ac
cordingly. A groat moral engine will be
kept oo the premises, so that, in case of at)
alarm of fire any member m >y have cold wa
ter thiowo upon him without extra pre
mium.— Boston Times.
That’s John’s Gnu.
At the battle of Blue Licks, 17R2, the
Kentuckians were defeated, with great
slaughter, by th? Indians. Among the cap
tives was a citiam of Mercer county, a bus
band and a father. He and eleven oth
ers were painted black, a sign that they
were devoted to torture and death. Rang
ing themio a row on a log, the Indians
slaughtered the eleven, one by one. When
they came to the bushaud they panned, and
after a great pow wow, spared bU life.
For a year he remained » captivp,
mourned by his friends as dead. But his
wife insisted that he was alive and would
yet return to her. A lover wooed her.
Her relatives aided his wooing. She con
sented to marry him, but from t me to time
postponed the wedding day. She could not,
she said, rid herself of the belief that her
husband was living and would yet return.
At lust the pleading of her lover and the
expostu'ation of her friends won from her
a reloc*ant consent to be mirried on a cer.
tain day. Oo its morning, just before
daylight, she heard the crack of a rifle.
“That’s John’s gun !” she cried : snd,
running from her cabin, in a moment was
clasped in her husband’s arms. Bit tbe
romance did not end with tbe husband’s
return. Nine years after be fell in “St.
Claic’s defeat.” Tbe disappointed Lover
renewed bis suit, and tbe widow at last be
came his wife. — Ex.
raking Advantage of Leap
Year.
A Detroiter who was out in the country
the other day to look after some poultry got
in a mud- bole, although having a light bag
gy and a strong horse. He got oat, took a
rail off the fence, and was trying to prize the
vehicle mi*, when along come a strapping
young woman about twenty six years ofage.
She hailed, surveyed the situation and sa : d :
"You stand by the horse while I heive on
the rail, and don't be afraid of getting mud
on your hands and bools.’’
Their united off trta released tbe vehicle,
and the Detroiter returned thanks and ask -
ed her »n get in and rile. She hesitated,
looked up and down the road, and final.y
said :
“Stranger, I’m blunt spoken. Who are
you ?’’
lie gave his name and residence, and she
continu.xl:
"I’m oker twentv-five, worth IP.'iOO in
cash, know all about housework, and this is
Leap Year.”
"Yes, I know ; but for henvenH sake don’t
make me marry you I” he replied, as he saw
the drift.
“See here," she continued, looking him
square in the eye. “I’m a straight up ami
down girl, wear a No. 7 shoe, and I like tbe
looks of you."
“Yes, but don’t—don’t talk tbit way lo
mcl"
“Stranger, it’s L“Rp Year, and I’m going
to pop I Will you have me or no f*
“I—l’m already married. ”be faltered.
“Honest Injua?’’
“Yes."
"Well, that settles it; and I won’t rMe.
11l take a cut across the field over to old
B poofter's. He’s got four sods and a fool
nephew, and I’ll begin on the old man and
pop tbe crowd clear down to the idiot, for
I've slummixcd around this world just as
long as I’m going to! Good-bye, sir, oo
barm done!— Detroit Fits Frets. 1
The Nabobs of tbe Press.
“Editors Hre usually wealthy," the man
with the sample case remarked.
“Yes," I »aid. “they are familiar with all
slang and business phrases of the money
market; they write about millions as ordi
nary men talk abut dollars; they know
how lo pay the national debt; they* build
railroads ; they organize mining and mag
nificent transportation companies with fabu
lous capital; they declare war withant coin
suiting the Rothschilds, and if all the banks
in America were to fail to-morrow, the
editors wouldn’t be a cent poorer than they
are to-day. Yes, they are rich. They
associate with the moneyed classes, they *<t
down at table with kings, and sometimes, to
h ippier, luckier moments, with aces ; if you
want to borrow money, go to the editor, be
will turn to bis advertising columns and tell
you where you can borrow it. If you havs
money to loan, rather than *ec you suffer Ik?
will borrow it of you himself. Rich ? Hu
know* the secrets of tbe moneyed rings ; be
divulges tbe plans and »cbem s of tbe heavy
operators to the people ; be roars himself
louder thon the balls, and growls among the
bsar« ; his voice is heard io tbe temples of
the money-chiqtgers. a-king for money ; be
warbles bis little roundelay oat nn the curb*
stow, in a melancholy minor key, when be
iloesii i get it. Oh, yes, editors are rich!
Whtn you want to spend all tbe money you
have in this wide, wide world, go to yoor
lawyer ; when yoa want something done tor
nothing, bie you to your newspaper office.
Then when you want to send some man to
Congress, send your lawyer, because you can
get along without him.”
I paused, and s profound, impressive
silence filed the car like a dream of pence. 1
looked around upon my audience.
It was asleep.— Bui tittle in Burlington
Hawke ye.
“I cal! you, my friends, to be witness if
this is Christianity,” is wbat tbe minister
was going to say ; but he got only as far
as “I call you,” when a balf-slnmberiug
brother in a near pew yelled, ‘Two pair—
aces and deuces but he was promptly
suppressed, and snaked oat by tbe sexton.
Two hooters at Circleville, Ohio, smoke.)
over a ponder keg, and the explosion blind
ed them tor life. That fact, bowevtr,
won’t make much difference to them, ns the
same explosion blew tbets into more pieces
than two coroners could pick up io. *
day.
Tbr most fuuny thing about a reformed
mao is that the day after be sweaas off from
drinking be wants to deliver a temperance
lecture, sod bare a prohibitory law exacted.
You no bouse wife—‘What miserable
NO. 35