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Th# Persevering Guesser. “It is amazing what perseverance will achieve.” said an Englishman. “Even misdirected perseverance has achieved marvels. There is the case of Robson, the great Notts cricketer. Robson during his Australian tour was determined one scrolling afternoon that his side shouldn’t do the hard work of fielding. Well, when the Aus t**alian captain spun the coin Hobson shouted, ‘Woman!’ Then, seeing that heads lay uppermost, instead of ac¬ knowledging defeat Hobson said, with perseverance and nonchalance: “ 'Well, we’ll go in.’ “ ‘But—er—I thought,’ said the puz¬ zled Australian—‘you see, I don't quite know the English meaning of “wo¬ man." ’ “ ‘Then,’ said Hobson gallantly, ‘we’ll toss again.’ “The Australian made a second toss. Robson called heads, and tails came up. The ordinary man would at this point have surrendered in despair, hut not so Robson. “ ‘Honors are now easy,’ said he, with a pleasant smile. ‘On with the rubber.’ “The Australian a third time flipped the coin, and, having at last called the toss correctly, the persevering Hobson led in his side to the shady benches.” An Unofficial Order. Thomas, tenth Earl of Dundonald, at his death vice admiral in the English navy, tells in bis “Autobiography of a Seaman” of an incident on board the Hind, on which he served as midship¬ man. The pet of the ship was a par¬ rot, the aversion of the boatswain, whose w'histle the bird learned to 1ml tate exactly. “One day a party of ladles paid us a visit aboard. By the usual means of a ‘whip’ on the yardarm several had been hoisted on deck. The chain had descended for another. Scnrcely had its fair freight been lifted out of the boat alongside when the parrot piped, ‘Let go!’ “The order was Instantly obeyed, and the unfortunate lady, instead of being comfortably seated on deck, was soused in the sea. Luckily for her, the men were on the watch and quickly pulled her out, and, luckily for the par rot, the boatswain was on shore or this unseasonable assumption of the boatswain’s functions might have end ed tragically for the bird.” How Prisoners Converse. A man who was sent to jail recently for three days for a small offense was greatly impressed with the precau¬ tions taken to prevent the prisoners engaging in conversation. There seem¬ ed to be warders everywhere, and no one was allowed to utter a word. On the Sunday he was in the church the psalm given was the “Old Ilun dredth.” Beside him were two old jail¬ birds, and Instead of the orthodox words beginning “All people that on earth do dwell” this pair sang a hynm of their own In conversational style, which went something as follows: First convict sings: “How lopg are you In for? I am doing sixty days. X nearly broke a copper’s jaw. Bing low or else they’ll maybe hear.” Second convict replies: “Tou are a lucky plc-can. I've got twel-elve months to serve. Tried to break Into a house. Some'dy must have gl en me away.” By this method they exchanged his ♦orisc during the singing.—Glasgow News. Too Humiliating. A certain small boy of six is rapidly assuming manly ways. Not long ago his ‘room” at school planned an enter¬ tainment. There were to he little songs and recitations and a mysterious grab bug. The small boy waxed elo¬ quent concerning the coming glories of this show, and more especially the part he would take. On the morning of the entertainment bis mother suggested that he should take his little sister, aged four, with him. He hung his head. “Don’t you want to take her?” his mother asked. “No, 1 don't,” he answered. “And why not?” The reply came quickly. “ ’Cause there ain’t none of th’ other fellers has to bring their children!”— Cleveland Plain Dealer. No Acid Needed. Weary William Rhoades- Say, Hap¬ py, wot’s de difference between us an’ new fall eider? Happy Harry—Search me. Weary William Hhoades—Dey don't have ter put no acid in us ter keep us frum workln’.” At which the dry hay iu the mow burst into a furious flame.—Exchange. Getting His Straight. “I wouldn't make a confidante of ''^May,” A self said satisfied the conceited smirk. "She fellow, with told me yolj said you were crazy to marry me. Of course she's no friend if”— “No,” interrupted Miss Wise, “and she’s not even a good reporter. 1 didn't say I ‘was,’ but ‘would be.’”—Catho¬ lic Standard and Times. Noiseless. Wife—Would it please you. dear, if I learned another language? IIusband Yos. it would delight me infinitely. Wife—Well, which one shall I study? Husband—The sign language.—Smart Set A Woman's Secret. Biggs—There goes a woman with a past. Boggs—Yes, and there are about twenty years more of it than she is willing to own up to.—New York Jour¬ nal. Great is the fact that our interests gradually take a wider scope, allowing more scope for the healing power of compensation.—Dinah Mulock Craik. A Fulsome Compliment. During Mr. Cleveland's tour of the south shortly after his marriage Mrs. Cleveland and he were driving cue day through the streets of one of the larger towns escorted by two of Its citizens. Some one threw a bunc h of violets to Mrs. Cleveland, and Mr. Cleveland bent forward to catch it, remarking as be presented it, “I wonder why no one gives me flowers.” One of the gentlemen present gal¬ lantly replied, “We think you have won the fairest flower in all the land.” “Ah, yes,” returned the president; “but, you see, I can't keep her in wa¬ ter!” “It is not necessary since you keep her in such excellent spirits,” was the reply. Here Mrs. Cleveland interposed, say¬ ing, “I am afraid you are guilty of flat¬ tery,” whereupon came the reply: “No, madam. Flattery is fulsome compliment, and In this Instance no compliment could be either too frank or too fulsome.” The charm of this response lies in the last and fourth from the last words, Mrs. Cleveland’s maiden name being Frances Folsom. A Queer Chinese Notion. One of the beliefs which the Chinese are slowly unlearning is that foreign¬ ers use the eyes and hearts of China¬ men In compounding rare ahd costly drugs which are valuable aids in magic. Medicine and magic have for ages gone hand in hand in China, just as they once did in Europe. Ignorant Chinamen therefore readily believe such tales. The use of eyes of Chinese by foreigners in metallurgy is describ¬ ed in a work called “A Deathblow to Corrupt Practices,” published in 1870. According to this, when white Christians had charge of a funeral they drove all the relatives and friends from the house. Both eyeballs were then removed from the corpse, the ori flees being filled with plaster. This was called “sealing the eyes for the western journey.” By compounding these eyes with a hundred pounds of Chinese lead, this veracious chronicle continues, eight pounds of silver could be extracted from it. The sight or¬ gans of any other people were useless for this purpose. Marine Rubber Chewers. The sailor, taking a flue, new rubber band from the stationery display, be¬ gan to chew it with vigorous enjoy¬ ment. “What are you up to there?” snarled the druggist. “Just rubber chewin’,” said the sail¬ or. “It's n habit with all us navy fel¬ lers. Keeps off gun headache. “Of course you, a landlubber, don’t know nothin’ about it. But let me tell you, mate, when a sixteen inch gun goes off aboard ship the Jar shatters winders, splits planks and brings your lower teeth up against your uppers like a straight left from old John L. “The result Is a gun headache—such a headache! But if you chew rubber in firing time it eases off the shock and you don't suffer none. 1 been chewin’ It steady ever since Manila Bay.” “Itubber chewing—what a nasty hubit.” said the druggist. “Hag chewin’s worse,” was the sail or's reply.—New Orleans Times-Demo erat. Close Quarters Fo*- Washington. At the time, now some years ago. when subscriptions were being solicit¬ ed for (he erection of a statue in New York city to President Washington a gentleman called to secure a contribu¬ tion from an old resident who, ul though wealthy, was a little “near.” On learning the object of the visit the rich man exclaimed: “Washington! Washington! Why, Washington does not need a statue! 1 keep him enshrined In my heart!” In vain were the visitor's solicita¬ tions. and he was naturally indignant at the parsimony of the millionaire. “Well, Mr. It.," he remarked quietly as he rose to leave, “all I can say is that if the Father of His Country is in the positiou In which you describe him he is in a tight place!” The Title “King.” The sovereign title of king has gen¬ erally been supposed to be derived from the old British word “gyning,” signifying “wise.” But the Hebrew term “roseh” Is doubtless the root of all the present titles denoting kingly power, including the l’unic “resell,” the Scythian “reix,” the Latin "rex,” the Spanish “rey” and the French “roi.” The German nations styled their monarch according to their different dialects—“konig,” “kuning,” “koning,” “king.” Time's Changes. The captain was receiving the new middy. “Well, boy, the old story, 1 suppose— fool of the family sent to sea?” “Oh, no, sir,” piped the boy, “that’s •11 altered since your day,”—London News. Not Misplaced. Hotel Clerk—I found the “Not to Be Used Except In Case of Fire” placard those college boys stole out of the cor¬ ridor. Manager—Where? Clerk— They’d nailed it up over the coal bin.—Boston Transcript. Gritty. “Fifty miles an hour! Are you brave?” She (swallowing another pint of dust)—Yes, dear; I’m full of grit.— Chicago News. A Deserter. Hewitt—Green has been airested for being a deserter. Jewett — Wife or army?—New York Tress. They conquer who believe they can. -Yergii. THE COVINGTON NEWS Hick*’ Story. It was in 1847 that Hicks first made a county name as a witty raconteur. In that year Sir Samuel Spry, who had been member for Bodmin since tne great reform Dill, lost his seat and in a petulant mood took legal proceedings, against Hicks on the ground that he had abused his official position to in¬ fluence voters at the poll. In the course of the trial Hicks was called upon to state what he had to say in Lis defense. In the course of his state¬ ment he asked leave of the court to illustrate his position by a story. His request being assented to, he related how a few days previously he had been to see a lad whom he knew well who was laid up from a fall from a vicious donkey, which had kicked out ail his front teeth. The lad, said Hicks, had taken the matter in the most kindly way and had said to him, “ ’Tlsn't the fall, Mr. Hicks, and ’tisn’t the vally of the teeth what annoys me, but ’tis the nashty, ghastly, wishous disposition of the jackass.” Sir Samuel Spry sprang up in the well of the court in a fury and ex¬ claimed, “He has called me a jack¬ ass!” The court was convulsed with laughter, and Hicks was promptly and fully acquitted of the trumpery charge brought against him.—Cornhill Maga¬ zine. Great Wars From Trifles. Great wars, pregnant with bloodshed and all the horrors accruing thereto, have very often been the outcome of trifling incidents which might, had they been treated properly, have been smoothed over and the slaughter avert¬ ed. More often was this the case In earlier times than It is now. Every one knows that William the Conqueror lost his life in France through his horse treading on a redhot cinder while he was superintending the burn¬ ing of Mantes, but few people know the fact which gave rise to the cam¬ paign that cost William his life. 1 tilling the latter part of his reign he became abnormally stout and con¬ sequently the laughingstock of not only his subjects, but tiis neighbors across the water. One day his con¬ temporary, Philip of France, compared him to a fillet of veal on casters and suggested that he Rhould be exhibited at a prize monarch show. This so en¬ raged William that he straightway made war upon his rhliculer, and the loss of thousands of lives was the re¬ sult.—London Tit-Bits. Gestures Part of Talk. There is a man who from a very early age has lived in countries where Spanish is the almost universal tongue. From force of this training he speaks Spanish perfectly. He has not the slightest trace of an English accent, nnd persons who do not know that he Is of American parentage are willing to believe he is a Spaniard, merely from hearing him talk. He is so per¬ fectly bilingual that it shows even In his gestures. When talking with Eng¬ lish speaking persons he sits quietly and does his conversing with his mouth alone. Only in case of making a point most emphatically does he use a ges¬ ture. But the moment lie drops into Spanish his every word is accompa¬ nied by a movement of the hands or arms. It is interesting to watch tlie change from the English to the Span ish side of him, because it comes so suddenly, lie really can’t speak Span¬ ish without gesturing.—New York Sun. Some Slang Words. A remarkable fact Is that many slang words have a classical origin. For example, the word “mill,” a vulgarism for a tight, is traceable to the Greek word “hamilla,” which means a com¬ bat. “Uncle,” the affectionate term for a pawnbroker, is derived from the Latin “uncus,” a hook on which the article pledged was hung. To go before “the beak" is a distinct reference to the old Homan custom of adorning the platform from which jus¬ tice dispensed with the beaks of ships, which platform came to be called the rostrum, that being the Latin for a beak or prow. Cruel. The rich bachelor sighed and looked at the beautiful girl fixedly. “Things are at sixes and sevens with me. I feel the great need of a woman iu my home, one who could straighten out my tangled affairs and make life worth living again.” Her glance spoke an Interest which approximately expecta¬ tion. "Yes?” she queried softly. lie blurted out. “Do you know of any good, ablebodied woman whom I could get to clean house?”—Argonaut. A Sure Scheme. Young Wife—I am determined to learn at what hour my husband comes home at nights. Yet do what 1 will I cannot keep awake, and he is always careful not to make a particle of noise. Is there any drug which produces wakefulness? Old Wife—No need to buy drugs. Sprinkle the floor with tacks. Aristocratic Fowls. 'Do animals have their social cus¬ toms and institutions?” “I presume so. 1 have no doubt that the geese have their descendants of the eacklers who saved Rome.”—Puck. His Specialty. Friend—That new gardener seems to be a very hard worker. Suburbanite -Yes. that’s his specialty. Friend— What? Working? Suburbanite—No. Jeeming to.—Town Topics. Oil of Bergamot. The world’s supply of oil of berga¬ mot comes from a comparatively small part of Calabria, in the extreme south of Italy, fronting on the strait of Me* slna. IS YuUR NOMELIFE HAPPY IaaMjL J^iCiiM'/ryuzlcC ite 1 1 his is a question which will naturally lead you to believe that our impression is that there are some homes in this city and county where the happiness and contentment is not what it should be. 1 have been in business here for the past twenty years and my observation is that a home where contentment reigns supreme is generally the ones furnished with that class of furni¬ ture recognized to be the most elegant, no matter how low the cost or how humble the home. It makes no difference whether you want to put a thousand or a hundred dollars in your house furnishings I have a line that will at once appeal to the artistic taste and also give the best wear and look good the longest time. In fact, 1 make the assertion that my stock of furniture is the best, most complete, durable and lowest priced of any house in the county. All I ask is for you to come to my place and look it over. We will make the terms to suit you and give you the best values you can get anywhere. Bear in mind that happiness and contentment will almost invaraibly be found in the home furnished from this mammoth stock, which includes everything in the furnishing line. j R. E. EVERITT. j 1 have also the only licensed embalmer the % got in city and my line of undertaking goods cannot be excelled. SEE' US FOB THE BEST OFFICE STATIONERY j ! How About That New Spring Suit? Getting time you were thinking about it? So it is. We’ve thought of you long ago. Just drop in and let us show you, Bring a friend or two if you like. We are always glad to see you. LEE BROTHERS, Covington, Georgia.