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CONSCIOUSNESS There in no Cj«ar wh > can bridge the Rhine That flow* forerermjre bstweea oar soul*, There U no ship Lint mil* the s?a that rolls Around th»St. Helens*, where we pine Forth)taju©Earo;.e« that are thine and mine. In utter s.Ulnls wa s»lc ottr goali, As distant from each other as the poles Of rpare's era re sphere, whose walls confine The universe. Since we mast tread alone The awful galleries of Consciousness, , Since we mast smle the Alps of the unknown. Whose misty crag* are draft) our distress. How sa I h's lot who rsihs not in his own ^Breast for the bo»a of hilp and happiness. —Franklin'F. penlbnin the Carrent. CONSEQUENTLY. ’ CIIAPTEU I. Oliver Hannon was walking down necticut avenue one morning early in June. There had been rain during the night, and nater in placet still flowed •lowly through the gutters. Nature war almost at her be t. The gnus in the yards and little parks wai one solid emerald, not jet browned or shriveled by the increasing heat. Roses seemed in spontaneous growth, and everwhere gave color and perfume. Children were play ing on the walks, and names lolling on the benches of Pacific Circle, as it was then called, where-*he Dupont statue now stands. In spite of the greenness of the gross and tfce freshness of the flowers, it •wa i excessively hot. The whole surface of the ground except the streets where tho asphaltum lind dried was steaming. The heat was of that moist,'suffocating kind that makes us say it is going to rain again. Oliver walked on briskly, for he hid to be at the Triasiry building at nine o’clock, and dried his ruddy face as well as ho could, from time to time, with his handkerchief. As he reached the N street c o«sing 1c hesitated and looked at his watch. It had suddenly occurred to him that he would like a glass of mineral water. With the thought came the con viction that this would not only be re freshing hut highly medicinal, and that his sj*tQS$r Hood in great need of it. *1 hero Was a place on Fourteenth street who.} he liked to get it. This wai now considerably out of liis way, but a*-his watch showed that he still had ftit&m minutes in whfch to get to his dcatailurj was time on * “ extra walk was desirable fo: frijhtcicd and abxnbcd, to pay much much attention to our young frierd. He lingered a second, then bowed, and went He had done his duty, but it was his ure also. He did not know whom he had assisted. He noticed, indeed, the house was fine and richly furnished, but at first he had merely seen that a human being was in danger, lie would have ' as much fora hod-carrier. was flush d and heated when he get back to the drugstore, but he did not stop. It had just occurred to him that he m’ght be late, and he palled oat his watch to find it was nine o’clock. Here was another entirely unexpected consequence. The work of a clerk in the Treasury is not so exacting, and a good deal of time may bs whiled away without visible result during office hours, b :t tardiness is osc.pf the unpardonab’c sins. Twi *e. before within two or three weeks, for uo very good reason, he had been a few miuntes laic. He walked rapidly but not confidently. He could scarcely expect this time to escape a reprimand, but he had no reason to tliiak that an explanation of the circumstances would not set cvc:ythirg right. He could not hc’p thinking us he walked what an uncammon’y pretty daughter the old gentleman had. In going up the steps, her arm. all unconscio sly, ha 1 pressed against his. He did not.mean to be silly, but it had sent an electric thrill through him which reproduced itself [ the thought ever and anou recurred to him, and thus lie reached his desk to find a note lying on it informing him tint his iservices would no longer be required. Whereupon the druggist recite J the facts already known to the reader. Did the druggist know anything about this man? He had never heard his name. He thought he was employed in the Treasury. Couldn’t say why he thought so. He had sometimes seen him with ether clerks. He had often stopped at the store, but he hadn't sren him since the iccdent. Later in the day Mr. Amidoa callel at the Department, but did not find tho young man. He looked over the list of those who were for any cause absent. Finally, by accident, he learned that one had been discharged on the very day the old gentleman fell on the street. Inquiry showed that this was the person he THE DIPLOMATS LEADERS OF THE DIPLOMATIC CORPS AT WASHINGTON. Peculiarities of Some of the Foreign Ministers—Dean of the Corps— The Russian Representa tive's Clever Wife. The Diplomatic. Corp3 T writes a Wash ington correspondent of the New York Sun t includes 125 .persons, more or less. Viewed 03 a whoie, the corps is only bril liant from, the court uniform point of sought. Mr. Amidon hasten to vcri.y f 0 J aken ^ividually, it has clever the statements in the anplication for re- j aunerinr tnTh^ en ’ women are SSSaffiLPSSS “ to%i ” nd S e,1 | Cnt C l erk ', ' SS ton^' 4 " 3 ’ rreCa ° m to it happened, a day or two later, that | There are about thirty ladies belonging ™ growmg | to tho twenty-nine legations at W«lSng°- 1 ton ’ but °* this n “">ber not mora than two communications. The one bore the half havc been here this year or base “•*"T °| f n^j'll!' been seen to official circles. The Dean was first opened. It announced his re- j of t b 6 Diplomatic Corps comes from the tKtw ett H.5Hi*i°tnow C that 1 hI y h^ i little island of Hayti. ^Mr. StephenPres- H ^ an .n t . ln0 ' rt fe t .£ <! *2?' ha presented credentials mL Ncllio Amidon became aware at last that the young man had gone, and that she had made no acknowledgement of his service*. She did not regard him as a hero at all. She did not, of course, know whit he had done. She had in truth scarcely notice 1 him. Still she cou'd not be a woman witnout taking note, by some instantaneous-process, of the details of his dress and general ap pearance. The photograph was not un- pleaung., A ypui?g ofcfb of two or three and twenty,' fairly good-looking and fairly dressed. When she found he was gone, her im- had to wiittf all day. Why should he not go wanted to? Ninety-nine] young men in a hundred wt I reasoned a^>out ai ha did, -and Jwouldl have considered it a mere whim’ to -be indulged p.ynot, according to' Individ- fancy. He had not the fniptest idea ‘'' j depended upon it an epoch in t| time Oliver looked nt his lerly gentlemen was just ' the door of his.housc near ircle. Tnis gentleman,whom r. Amidon, was going down- uld take tho street car at ■COTS. slowly down tho steps. He was not a very large man, bqjfc, had somethii bulbous sppearanr ‘ M * i headed cane, cni | | What witfcthe liTHo WfeTny onthc steps and with- Hanndq’s rapid walk, they " " Bbe precise point to him, but he wai already a half-block away. . ; ; ?: ‘ - * A .;: • “Who was that young man?” she asked, coining hack to her father. “What, has he gone?” said the old gen tleman. “I meant to inquire his name and rcsiicncc.” “Well, hb must think wb are curious barbarians/ 1 said Nellie, and straightway began to distress herself over her lack of rj>t . courtew. Whatever other offonsi w Ncv*r-! condoned, however hirh crimes and life of m - s< ^ e!nc - nor3 might be palliated, for im politeness* there was no forgiveness, cither in this life or the life to cone. “But you will rco him when you arc well again, and tell him how very much obliged we are, won’t you, papa?” “Certainly, my dear,” said the old any dealing with the— ; —Bank. He was more than astonished at the contents. To a very neat letter of thanks from Mr. Amidon Was appended an offer of a situ ation in the bank at a better salary than ho had been receiving. And now inj story t is substantially told. Every reader knows instinctively what followed. Of course he accepted the latter offer. Of course ho became in dispensable in tho bank, being a really capable yonng man. Of course he was prudent and rogations, and invested his ’ igs.in real estate that soon doubled ilue, and in the course of. two or three years, was looked upon and pointed out as a rising young man. He often, siw Nellie, who persisted in- thinking him quite a hero, though he was not. Anxious to atone for her first rudeness, she had gone further, perhaps the other way than strict politeness required. So it came about, little by little in the chain of events, freely indeed, but in obedi ence to the far-off, ayparently uncon nected cause, they were drawn together, interested in each othsr, and—why pro long the tale? As so many worthy couples before them, and ,*o many, who will follow them to the end. of time, please God, they fell violently in love, and in due time were.-niarried. After- on the matter it had rather a.diffi- cult look. To find a man whose name, residence and occupation were unKnown ! was a good deal like finding a needle in a haystack. .He was not utterly cast down, however. The usages of society, with him, were not.a matter of life and death. Tho young man, on his part, had felt lived up surprise, and perceived no lack of would col i ■ n-w where the old gentleman would take the uv »•**!»*•*• «uu iwivchcu uw wi street cari ..Oliver had often enough ! courtesy. He quite appreciated Nellie's heard Mr. AmidohV name, but ho did 1 preoccupation. Certain! v he would have ‘ TIFt ’ ' ’ ■ was fully reciprocal who notjraSydi* _ | **'" % hut had never bo much as t strut rolled a wav, ho fell * closed o hard wil some one had not obi movement, and darted forward in the nick of time.’ A carriage was whirling about tlitw Circle between the track and the sidewalk, the eyes of tho negro driver being on everything except his team and tho road. A clutch at their bridl s brought the hofsok up so suddenly that th: d iver had nearly pitched head ing from his scat. iUfrjjrwhilMPiew»a blank astonishment he looked down to sec a man almost tinder his horse's feet. When the light began to come again to Mr. Amidon, he looked up to-see a young man. fanning him, and saying cheerfully: agR > .“filing better, aren't you? You’ll be enjoyed a word of recognition from such a very pretty girl. It would have been u great pleasure to tell her that it Was a satisfaction to bo of any service. But had she not run against him on the step? Had her arm not rested for several seconds against his? Ah, reader, ho was young. Alas! that we cannot always he eighteen and twenty-throe; that it can not always bA June; and that there is other work for young men and maidens beside helping elderly gentlemen up the steps. In the unexpected leisure that fob lowed, ho had a chance to go over the matter again and again. The doorstep scene, to which he succeeded * iadjvtc declare that it was a case of love ft tirsl sight, which the reader has seen was by uo means tiie cnee. And now let us turn back a little in our story to see how’strangely things* come about. It was a quarter to nine, we said, when Oliver Harmon looked at his watch, at the corner of N street and Connecticut avenue. He thought it well to be several minutes early rather than one minute late. It was very hot, and he did not like the extra walk. Besides, there was a place down-town where he could get his mineral water without going out pf his way, and he concluded to wait. Therefore it was that he kept straight down the avenue. ni3 walk was such, as we have said, that if he had turned at N street it would have brought him to the exact spot, at the exact instant that Mr. Amidon fell. But as he did not, he never knew the old gentleman’s need of assistance which he would have been de lighted to render. Consequently, he was ink; consequent- . not marry her. It was Henry Lcland who had been walking down Fourteenth street who did all that.—II. E. Warner. voy Ex traordinary and Minister Plenipotentiarj of the Hayti Republic on February 18, 1873. This ceremony took place in the blue-room of the White House, where all foreign representatives are presented to the President. Thirteen years of service -places Mr. Preston the senior over the other ministers and. make', him their Dean. Before - he became Dean the honor lolpngcd to the Hawai ian Islands, whose representative, Elisha Allen, was De in, succeeding the British Minister, Sir Edward Thornton: After the latter’s promotion to St. Pe tersburg, Mr. Allen by seniority of ser vice became the Dean. Ho preceded the corps on the New Year's morning of 1883, and was the first to enter 1 the blue room to greet President * Arthur. This was only a short hour beforo his tragi cally sudden death in the White House ended the New Yoor reception. Ilis daughter. Miss Allen, is rememberc 1 us one of the loveliest young women in the corps. ^ The present Dean is a man of physique and Haytian com, lex is serenely smiling faco keeps company with a serenely courteous man ner that indicates the happy, smooth temperament of tropical people. . Two years ago Mr. Preston was sent by his gove nment ou a special mission to Eu-. rope, where his family have been with him. When here, theirs was one of t’.c very pleasant houses open to v’s tors on regular days,aftc.’ thVAmerican fashion. Mrs. Preston is Quite, as genial as her husbpnd. and was a popular hostess. Thnir eldest daughter, tall and of French type, was one of the best dressed girls in society. _ Mr. Preston, who recently paid a brief visit here, takes his family from Paris to London for the .summer, and brings them back to this country next autumn. The French Minister, M. Theodore Roustan, is a bachelor. There has never seemed to bo any doubt of that. And he could never by any possible mistake be taken for other than a Frenchman. He is a very agreeable Frenchman, too. His English is limited' but his gestures are not. M. Roustan may not be able la say more than “Yon have now a fine day,” in the six words, but in one gesture of his hands, and a single lifting of his eye brows, he will better express all that can be said about the weather, good or bad, than other diplomats; who pride them- previously been fortunate in.her repre sentatives to this country gave reason for Americans to bo severlv critical. Eut the Ds 6tuves are an honor to their coun try, and are an important social acqui sition to the diplomatic corps. The new Spanish Minister has but re cently arrived, and Scnor Valera has de parted. Ho hal been here two years and maintained a bachelor establishment, his wife was not with him. His nephew, Senor Mesia, one of the attaches' of the legation, is somewhat noted in society for peculiarities, which are more than eccentricities of person and deport ment. He is the yonng foreigner who has astonished society now and then by appearing at parties in knee-breeches and a dress coat with r large, smooth, brass buttons. Since cur Government insisted on send ing Mr. Keiley to Austria thixt Govern ment ha3 been represented at Washing ton by a Charge d’ Affaires, - Count Lippe Weissenfeld, a bachelor, and for some time connected with the legation. The Count is large, show;y and blonde, and looks more English than Austrian. Ho is an incessant but harmless flirt, never concentrating his affections long on one objects The Italian Minister is a picture of the Louh XIV. nobleman, and is tall, black- eved and white-haired. BUDGET OF FUN. HUMOROUS SKETCHES FROM VXRIOUS-SOyRCES. Tho Penalty 'of Profanity—A Walk- ins Mystery—Commodore, Van derbilt Overreached—Not Afraid of Burglars, Etc. The average small boy of the present day is seldom at a loss for something to say, even in the most embar:assingsitua- tions. Bobby, a precocious youth of six summers, had been indulging in pro fanity, and, in order to escape the pun- ishment for which hismoihcr .had made .thi preparations, he crawled under & b.irn and remained there in a state of siege for the greater part of tha afternoon. When his rather returned at'ni&ht and learned how matters stood he male his way, with much difficulty', under the barn in search of the boy. “Hello, pa,” said Bobby, cheerfully, as his sire appro been swearing, too!”—Huston. na*sc3 as bright and clear as one could ask for; the night following was equally pleasant, and the next day started in as clear as a morning in June, with no sign of snow to be discerned. “The boys couldn’t stand it any longer. First one sent a messenger to Swift in quiring ‘Where is that snow stornri’ and then another took it up and sent in his question. In a few hours Swift received about five hundred messages from Illi nois, Iowa, Missouri and Minnesota, in quiring where that snow storm was. and when it might be expected to arrive at the station of the inquirer. One of the boys Wanted his storm sent by express, and another asked wliat snow looked like, anyway. In this way,they kept it up until poor Swift was ‘knocked out of the box,’ as the baseball people say, and after giving orders’that the Signal Ser vice reports should bo fired from tho road he went home and stayed there for thirty- six hours.”—Chicago UeralL l -their efficiency in- our lan- never employed in thebanl selves, guage. It was Mr. Blaine who said one even ing at a dinner party: “Mine, do Struve »ri.« ni«»irt nA + T n <iu«a j ** the cleverest woman in Washington.” The Bjaektoot Indians. - The wife of an ex-Cabtoct ircmbcr, who The five tribes were reckoned fifty felt herself not without cleverness, quickly years ago, to comprisonot less than thirty made tho nnnlifiestion: “Yon menn in thousand souls. Their numbers union, in ,ij 0 Diplomatic Corps, Mr. Blaine!" and warlike spirit made them the torror | without an instant hesitation, he an- of all the Western Indians. It was not. swered: <‘No, I mean that Mme. dc uncommon for thirty or forty war-patties struTC i, the cleverest woman in Wash- to be out at onceagamst the hostile tribes J togton.” Those who know the wife of of Oregon ana of the eastern plains, J the Russian Minister agree with Mr. from the hhoshonces of the south to the ; Blaine. Those who are not so happy addin'- Cr ' c ! offl» f, ; r , n “ r l 11 !: Th? c ? untr I would hardly see in the little, pale, gray . C 1 which tho Blnokfnottribe* clnimcrl nroti- r» .t,. » -i romantic little details, occnptod I The o’.d gentleman had not realized that anything much was wrong. It was only a slight attack of vertigo^ not at all uncommon. Ho would get "into the car, which was of course waiting for him; but ho was a little surprised that it had moved away. In fact, two or three had passed the same point since he fell. * He looked around to see quite a little , crowd collected about him. . He was lying in the shade of a tree at the edge of the sidewalk. His head, which had very little hair on it, was covered with a wet handkcrchiet. His collar was un buttoned and limp, and his shirt-front much demoralized. The pungent smell of ammonia was in the air and in his nostrils. Then he began to realize that something had happened, but he could not remember what.. When Mr. Amidon recovcr.d, the young m: I call a cab for you now “Thank you. I live very near here, sensible fellow on the whole! He knew that no significance was to be attached to the little episode. He did not so much as walk by the house in the daytime. He expected no recognition. It was not Certain that he wished for an acquaintance with the subject of his fancies. His judgment was in no way influenced by his virions. -He jcnew-thst the dau ibter* <tf wealthy m-h in Wash- ington did hot, as a rule, mnrry Treasury clerks—discharged clerks at that. It was horribly unjust, ho thought, that he should have lost his place through an act of humanity. And ,yet -in spite of the consequences ho could not tliiak that he would do differently if 'placed again in like circumstances. He chcided to make a full statement, in writing, of the case, and ask to be reinstated. This he did, and submitted to the slow grist of the gods. While he waited, his health demanded a good deal of exercise. Ho found none so healthful as walking, and no. street so wholesome as that on. which Nellie lived. It was only in the evening that lie walked there, ne always felt his pulses quicken a3 he looked up at the window, but he never saw her. What difference does it make, he thought, since nothing could come of it? He had not so much as thought of. inquiring who lived in,the house. - Mr. Amidon wav not dangerously i’.L But for that unlucky fall, the attack would have passed off iu a moment. , Ho had been considerably shaken, and what with the heat and Nellie’s fears, stayed at home for several days; then, feeling quite restored, he started downtown one morning. He looked- curiously at the dace where the accident occurred, as if and if you will help me to my feet I think he expected to see a dent in the pavc- I can get home.” ment. ne stopped a. moment at the lie got up, but stood so unsteadily on ' drug-store, drauk a glass of soda, water, his legslhat'the young man could not; and chatted a little with the proprietor, with whom he was well ncquafartpa. ’ “By-tfce-way,” said the latter, after remark'llg upon his apparent health, think of letilughim go alone, and two walked slowly along to the high steps the old gentlemau bad descended ten minutes before. He sat down wearily on the lower step while hi* companion ran up to ring. Miss Nellie, sitting at the w indow, at this instant looked out and saw her father's t unbled and generally disre-, caueu ni spec table appearun *c. Full of a great | him to i< * fright, she rushed out and narrowly ‘-Oh, crly as their own comprised the valleys and plains along the eastern slope of the Rocky Mountains, from the Missouri to the Saskatchewan. This region was the favorite resort of the buffalo, -vvhose-vast herds afforded the Indians their princi pal means of subsistence. In the year 1836 a terrible visitation of the smallpox swept off two-thirds of the people; and five years later they were supposed to count not more, than fifteen hundred tents, or about ten thousand souls. Their enemies were then recovering their spirits and retaliating upon the weakened tribes the ravages which they had formerly committed. In 1855 the United States government humanely interfered to bring about a complete cessations of hostilities between the Blackfoot tribes and the other In dians. The commissioner appointed for the purpose summoned the hostile tribes together and- framed; ;a| treaty for them, accompanying the act with a liberal dis tribution of present* to bring the tribes into good humor. This judicious pro ceeding proved effectual. Dr.' F. V. Hayden, in his account of the Indian tribes .of the Missouri Valley, states that from the period of the treaty the Black- foot tr.bss had become more and more peaceful in their habits-,, and were consid ered, when he wrotoj the best disposed Indians in the Northwests He remarks that their earlier reputation for ferocity was doubtless derived, fromtheir enemies, who always gave them ample cause for attacking them. “Idaa intellectual and moral point of - view;**! he* adds, “they take the highest rank, among the wild tribes of the West.” The recent reports of the Indian agents and other officials of the Canadian Northwest confirm this favorable opinion of the superior honesty and intelligence of the Blackfoot tribes. While constantly harrassed on their re serves by the incursions of thievish C:ees and other Indians, who xol> them of their horses, they.forbear to-retaliate, andhon- *you l.ad a rather close cill. "Mr. Amidon opened his eyes, didn't like the Ulusioa to h ; s apoplectic tendency, which he wa-» quite aware of. and to which his physicia i, inde.-d. had called his attention, but -which it suited , he said, carelessly; “it was upsetting the young man com- just a little rush of blood to the head.” yon poor dear papa, what is the matter ?*’ cried she, as she reached his side. “Nothing much, my dear,” said he, more cheerfully than his looks war ranter!. “Please help me un the steps.” So putting his arms over the shoulder of Ida daughter on one side, and of the on the other, he walked le steps into the high, cool i recuning-chair, where he : and with a sigh of satirise , . magnetism, bril liancy and fascination which are hers. Mme. de Struve has a short, thin figure, colorless complexion, blue eyes, and permaturely gray hair. As dress goes, she could not be called a well-dressed woman. Her clothes, though always of good material, seem to bs the one thing she is most unconscious of, and on which she spends the least thoflght. But with all lack of taste in sl&de and fashion, her appearance never suggests want of harmony. Without' beauty and without the art of dress,: she is acknowledged 1 by the entire Diplomatic Corps to be their cleverest member, and Jlr. Blaine give* her no equal and no rival in Washing ton. The Russian Minister's wife* i* thoroughly well read in books,and knows the newspapers qf all countries ft ginning to end. Sbo»iv master 6 dozen languages,speaking English as well asher native tongue: Her knowl edge of medicine is! large, and was gained by a coursc-of study. She 19 in clined to be what is called strong minded in this country,and if she were an Ameri can would be claimed by the woman suf fragists. * She i* abetter diplomatist than her husband,, and the compliment to her is no disparagement to him. - Iu fact, it may bq_saidthat few Ministers here are as accomplIsEeirin "diplomacy as Mme. de Struve. But she is one of the most truly natural women,frank anioutspoken and just. When * young American abused her hospitality % appearing af. one ot .. Teaching Canaries Tricks. Patience and continual instruction only can teach a bird tricks. Because it some times gives no outward sign of imitation is not to be accepted as a belief that it is not learning. It is practicing the trick in private, and not until a perfect rehear sal will it give a public exhibition. To teach a bird to kiss hold him tightly, chatting in soothing tones till he is quiet; then kiss the bill repeatedly, still soothing him with gentle talk. Kiss the bill again and a~ain till! he .ceases to struggle in fear of , the salute; then bestow a final one—a kiss of approbation —and release him to partake of his en joyment. . Repeat this the rest day- several times a day if you wish to teach him quickly—and h) soon resorts to this performance as a method of coaxing, opening and closing his bill between your lips exactly as you have done by him; so nearly as bird imitation is possi ble. If he picks your lips do no notice ir before him. The cage of a nervous bird should neve: be touched without calling the tenant’s attention, because, being always engaged in some project, aq abrupt action starts him just as it would a human being who is come upon suddenly. - , To teach him to sit upon your finger, draw a chair up near the cage, hold a conference with him, and then introduc ing a finger between the wires near his favorite perch, hold it there, patiently reading your book or paper meanwhile. The new object showing no disposition to harm him,'he goes up cautiously for an examination. Then he picks it to ascer tain the material—maybe he fights it. This is a good sign. He no. longer fears it. Repay him with some choice morsel and cheerful words for his courage. Try him again in the afternoon. He may go further and light on it. Possibly the trick may take several days. Be patient. Once the step is attained, vary the pro gramme by introducing the finger into other spots. He will-soon light on it at any point or angle. Next try thrusting, the fingers under the door. Next time fasten it open, blocking egress with the rest of the hand as one finger extends within. When he perches on it draw him forth a little way. Next tempt him to perch outside a little, andeoon. In a short time you but have to open the case door, uplift a finger and he is sure to fly for it, arid he may be thus called to any part of the room to rest on the familial perch. To eat from the fingers let him hun ger several days for some favorite dainty —say a fig. Show him one; disregard his elation; do not let him have it. Spread a few seeds over the end of youi finger and offer them close by his perch, allowing him plenty of time for specu lation. Soon no will sna‘ch off a seed or two. If he utterly refuses, put him sadly away, leaving the fig where he may see it. Next day try again; he’ll take one or more. That will do. Do not plague him any longer. Give him piece of fig in the cage, and leave him alone until next day. He may feel in dependent, btiug surfeited, a .d refuse to pick. No matter; put him away without his fig. The next day he is sure to pick all off the fingers. Praise the act and reward him.. After that, if is plaiu sailing.'—Cincinnati Em/ Walking Mystery. A young lady belonging to oiie of the first families of NewYork returned from a walk. - Her mother, who is very strict with her, asked: “Where have you been?” “I have just been taking a 'little fresh air iu Central Park.” “Aloac?” “Alone.” “Arc you sure of it I” “Of course I am. Why dv*» you ask?” “Oh, nothing at all; except when you went out you to k with you a parasol, and you come home with a gentleman's cane in ycur hand.” The young l.dy has taken the matter under advisement and will bring in a vordict at an early date. — Tcxjs'SifJngs. The Commodore Overreached. An amufcing story is told of the way i which William H. V anderbilt overreached his father, the Commr>dcre. William wanted manure from the Fourth avenue car stables for his Staten Island farm, and asked his father what he would charge for ton loads. “Wtat’ll you give!” asked the Commodore. “‘It's worth four dollars a load to me,” said the farmer. “Goodenough; Til let you have it for that,” answered the railroad man, having a decided impression that the price was a* at least twice as mu:h as the ituff was worth. Next d iv he found his rustic sou with a scow" just loaded for home. . “How many loads have you got on thats off, Bi ly?’’ oskc l tin commodore, in excellent humor. “How many?” r:prated tho son, feign ing surprise; “one, of course.” “One! why there's at least thirty,” the old gentleman exclaimed, inspecting it curiously. “No, father, I never put but one load a scow—one scow load! Cast off the lines, Pat!”—Chicago Times. No Fun in tho Judge. Two Dakota lawyers recently had soma trouble with a new judge and were dism asting the subject. Said one: “You got thirty days or §100, did you?” x “Yes.” . • \ ‘Pay the fines” ' ” ^ mounriit tturi Vhat’d, in jail was good enough hofineyou't” V “Fifty dollars.’/ “Pav it?” jrabljrab'de by the terms- of their late . He writes all bfe notes t*) Americans in. treaty, which binds them to leave the je-j English, us he- deem* this more rompli- dress cf such grievances to the Canadian j jncutary to. them than tlie use of French. thQritics.—Popular Science Monthly. i pjis official papers are also written Trees* Profes ;or Lazenby, of Cornell Univer sity, says: To make timber plentiful and to render our climate more genial we must re-clothc all rugged, broken land and rocky crests, in fact,, every acre that is not cultivated or is cultivated at a loss, with valuable forest tree?. First—All ravines and steep hillsides, all land too rocky to be thoroughly cleared of stone and plowed, shoufcf be devoted to-trees. Second—Protesting belt* of timber should be planted wherever buildings, orchard, gardens,etc.,are exposed to cold, sweeping winds. Third—The banks, of streams, ponds, open- ditches, etc , should he so planted witli> trees that they will be protected from, abrasion by floods andi rapid .rent* Fourth—All public road* should be belted by graceful, stately trees. We- should preserve, improve and ex tendi out existing forests by keeping up a constant succession of young, growing trees of the best varieties. To do this it is-nocessary: [ First—To allow no stock to wood-lots for purpose of forage. This should be a rule inflexible and relent- leesv Second—Young growtii in forests should be thinned moderately and judi ciously. Worthless varieties should be exit out and the valuable sorts should be trimmed up so that they will grow tall, forming trunk rather than branches. Third—Timber should be ent with ii -taBigeht reference to. future growth. Valuable trees that you;wishto pr should be cut in the spring. Those that* Engl&h, After Mr. Lothrop. ou'r'pTescM !">>> to.extermiMt*should be cut a Minister to Rustia, was appointed, hc-j Au » ast - , her evening parties'in sUhalf-intoxicated condition, she- quietly requested his friends to take him home. The next day. she, wrote the young fellow a note recall ing the invitatiDiuvvrhich prevented him from going; again to her house. At the same time she was even more kind than before to his sister, whom she continued; to welcome as her guest. * Mr! Charles de Struve reads and writes English perfectly, hut do?s not speak.it as fluently -as- his wife. He is most punctilious oa fit points of etiquette. ‘I did not mean that, but the car riage,” a»id the druggist. Mr. Amidoa opened Ins eyes still wider. Somebody was evidently quite off the track. “The carriage? What do you mean?” “Didn't yonr friend tell you how nearly you were nmov^rf’ “Run over? My friend? The young men who walked home with me, you mean?” “He seemed to take matters quite into his own hands. I thought he was a personal friend.” “I never saw him before,” said Mr. Amidon. “Tail me about it.” to Wa-hiugton, but | * =■» p a y hi* On l»s lm of his the bcich and begin to supply the mu-j *.ty,hc otliled at Ae kgH?”- ket of Tiburon and Greed Gu.re nith De Struve was .bout to start for Mew mest. The specialty was sc attractive ' ._?* <*£*** at ,ho door to variety of fresh pork steaks that found a * a * £2 “ un *° ready sale,' till one day a storm-flood Dear Bought Knowledge. washed out a sand-bar at the mouth of a ighboring bayou and revealed a whole abattoir of carved human corpses. Sus picion at once pointed to the Marsette boys, who at the time were absent on one of their weekly cruise), but were caught the next night in the act of landing ation. Hut when Mr. Lothrop's note,asking when he might call, was handed to the minister, he answered it at once, inviting Mr. Lothrop to lunch with him. Then he dismissed hia car riage, and half an hour later received and entertained his visitor. In the evening he took the tram for New York, and Mr. Lothrop probably does not know to this nis host w frrab of vic4bn.r They (ecm 6 to day ttot ki. hov. w., purf«tly .w.ra,of . ® a it..: v: __ *1 j: i the breach of etiaoette in the omission to students would terra it, by cruising ! ““““J” along the coast and raiding solitary fish-1 lt had beeocause for some diplomatic ermen's cabins and jungle ranchos. comment. The foot that Russia had not But by looking at the picture just below, You will see whv it will fall “short.” The grocer^men now will have 1 ▲ deaf man could see that we’ve got ’em; In fact ere right ou to their little game— That dottecl lino U the bottom. —Detroit Free Pres*. Not Afraid of Burglar*. ‘It’s a joke on me, of course, but I'll give it to you fellows,” said a Cass farm man to a little group in the city hall yes terday. * ‘I have a great fear of burglars. When I go to bed I want to know that sry door and window is securely fas- icd. About a month ago wo changed hired girls, and the new-comer was very careless about the doors o' nights. On two or three occas'ons I came down stairs at midnight to find a window up or tho backdoor unlocked/ I there ore deter mined to put up a job on her. I got some false whiskers and an old rig, and ’ht about 11 o-’clock I crept up the back staiis to her room. She was snor ing away like a trooper, but the rainut: I struck a match she awoke. I expected a great yelling and screaming, but noth ing of the sort took place. She bounced out of bed with a ‘I0u villain!’ on hei lips, seized a chair by the back, and be fore I had made a move she knocked me t> my knees.- Before I could get out of room she struck me again, and it only after I had tumbled down the back stairs that she gave the alarm. Then she went through to my room, rapped on the door and coolly announced: “ .‘Mr. Blank, please get up. I’ve killed a burglar.’ ”—Detroit Free Prcxt. Surprising Unanimity. said the police reporter last night, as he paused to sharpen a' pencil, “I see that Bob Burdette has given an account of a strike he went on when a schoolboy. I never was on a strike, but I had a lively experience in another line. On Friday afternoon when we were ex pecting the School Board to come around and see the school on dres* parade, the boy* agreed, with one “Th» boy stood Well, the Bo ird came, and things looking as solemn as a funeral when the first bogr walked out and started off: 'The boy stood on the burning deck Whence all but him hal fled; 'Eh©- flames that lit the battle wreck Shone round him o’er the dead.* “He* went through the thing without t “Yo\ that-is, my wife’s father,did.” }/ “Of c:urs;—I didn't suppose mu raised « it yourself. What w^s it you call.d the old judicial snoozer?” “I was telling him that his counte nance reminded m? of a fre*ght-car wh’ch load been to a smash-upland that in his various rulings he leaped about from wrong ideas to untenable premises like an insane jack rabbit—when he socked it onto me.” ’; “Yes. Now that’s thp usual talk and the old judge never objected. I put it a little stronger and told him that 1 could only explain the unheard-of rulings of the court by the supposition that they came from a man with a spavined intellect and then threw my coat and hnt and jeUggfr ‘Comedown, you ancicut antiqui|y,;nridj I’ll whale enough^senrf $nfo your shat tered mind so tnat|yo:& can hold Uj por tion at pounding-sand with a ball clubT * Lernrny get -you and difigtfre the fair face of nature by scattering your worth- . loss remainsaround this judicial district!* He said it would be §100 or thirty days and then went oa and decided the case against me.” “Yes, that’s the way it goes—it seems he can't take a joke. It strikes me that f this administration is going to send many more of these kind of judges out here* that tho e ntire temtorial bar will bo in jail. If this is the way they arc going to work it there don’t appear to be much encouragement for a lawyer to tako right hold of a case in earnest and make Romo open her mouth clear back to' her ears and howl.”—EstelUnc (Dak.) Bell, .vi - Taking Disease From Books. Visitors to 'the Congressional Library bad their attention attracted the other day by the demeanor of aa old man who entered with the as istance of a crutch, writes a Washington correspondent of the New York Mail and Ex/.res*. He had a bandage over one eye and q roll of red flannel enveloped ope pf his hands. Ho stored his crutch away by the side* of his chair, adjusted the bandage over his eye, ani rubbed his., side while waiting. Presently the attcuaaut brought him an armful of books that seemed to be medi cal work). The cripple was soon ppur- , ing over these with the deepest interest. “That’s one of them,” said the re- P9rtcr’s companion. . “I see,” replied the reporter. “So de voted to books thut he climbs up tho Capitol steps and comes hire (dread,, notwithstanding his terribly afflicted frame.” ‘ ^ * “Well, it’s not exactly that.” replied the habitue. “It’s his affliction^ that brings him here, and it’s, his^affliction that he comes. You sec he is/ as I said, ono of them. There ara .enough more. They come to read up their own cases. Those books before him speak of blind ness, lameness and lheumatism. He is one of the best informed men on those subjects in the city. * The more he knows about the ailments the worse becomes Iris affliction, and he will probably, add some new ones bcfo:e A ho gct^ through w&h that pile of books.' Whefl he started in here he had something the matter with one of his eye*, and he came to read up on blindness. «By careful study he has spread ailments* all: over himself,, until there, is no point in his body that ain't in* torture. He had been reading up his own case, .and ha* improved upon it. . , v „„ That’s about the way with all of them. The**hurliiniTde'clT”of* them arc actually suffering from ' ■ -me trouble for wli'ch*they are seeking remedy. Others are unconsciously looking for trouble) to have. Men who have some* chronic ailment, for which doctors have been unable* to give them any relief,, go to the library and read all the works they can find that may, in any way, apply to their case. Some of them become experts in particular branches of medicine. .They devote* their whale lives to it,, and never seem to'think tr speak of anything else. 9bm?, like this man, discovorthat they are in posse sion of a great variety of ailments, and their researches into medicine becomes very extensive, though somewhat desultory. Some get cured of one complaint when they fall into possession of another, but others retain all the old ones and continue to nurse and train them vary carefully while adding new ones constantly. But generally they are devoted to one particu lar thing, and they pursue* that assidu ously. They ore one of the peculiar classes of leaders.” “ * The.bay stood on the burning deck,’ etc. “Tha-teacher’s eyes opened wide; and the School Board looked puzzled) but the boy*all looked so solemn that the uninitiated thought there was rathim? wrong: The second boy went through the last:lihe* P took his seat and tho third boy. arose. Tsc silence was oppressive until hc*begj*n: ‘“The boy stood on the burning deck: Whence all “bat ho had flea; “3ht that was all the further he* got. The teacher rose in his might, marched the.antire crowd off to a burning deck adjacent and thrashed the whole ca boodle.”—Atlanta Constitution. Sxrift’s Snow Storm. “Talking about the signal service and its bad lark in th3 wcither prophesying business* 5 * - said a station agent “let me tell you a; Utile tt *ry about Swift, Super- intendcafc- of Teh graph on the Rock Island. Some time last winter the Sig nal Service people told Swift they would furnish him their bulletins, if he would urdertakc to send them ojafc and have them posted along the road. Swift cepted the offer, and thought it a big thing. He had instructions sent out to all operator) conccrni g. posting of the weather bulletin)/and felt so proud of the new service that he went around .I ragging what a good thing it xv b.\ Iu a few days the Signal Service predicted a very heavy fnov; storm, and Swift sent word to the Superintendents, suggesting that they had bettor make arrangements in advance to keep the tracks clear of the unusual fall of snow sure to come. “ ‘Now, you see,* he said, ‘how valu able this service is to a ra lroad. When that snow comes we’ll be prepared for it, and not a wheel will be stopped. ’ “Instructions were sent out to station agents and section bosses, and in some places gangs of extra* laborers were hired to shovel snow. But the snow storm didn’t seem to be in a hairy, The Changes in Congress. There is nothing, in this, country that has „ undergone a greater change than its Congress. When. I.wa&iu that body, says Judge James J. Xindlcy, of St. Louis,, to A Globe-Democrat reporter, we received §5 a day, and even that was an advance which at that time was strongly opposed and condemned by some. My first year I received §720, while on th* next year the-pay-roll credited me with, about §2.000. The only satisfaction now is- in knowing that Webster and Clay worked for the same money. Then wo did a great deal of ov* own committed ■work also. No” the pay-roll for com mittee clerks is about as large as it then was for members. This shows a vast change. The present members of Con gress can hardly appreciate how the work was then done. Thunderstorm in a Clear Sky. Captain Andersoa, of the British bark Siddartha, which, lately arrived in New York, reported a peculiar thunderstorm while on the the northern edge of the Gulf Stream. The sky was quite clear at the time and the sun shining brightly, although there appeared to be a thin mist about the ship. Suddenly there ap peared a vivid flash of lightning^ companied by violent thunder.