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Tfcaerr: CONOENSED STORIES. B m» Cat Was the Only Ona Praam! Not Embsrraastd. , The late Thomsa B. Reed enjoyed • joke on no one more than on hlmeelf. One auch ia related by a Washington society woman whoen- joyed hu personal friendship.' After all, the joke was chiefly on the lady, which may be the reason why she and not Mr. Heed was the narrator. She ia a cat enthusiast. Many and beautifnl are the cats she owns; grate and reverend are their names, chiefly borrowed from emi nent public personages, but none was more handsome or dignified than the one she had named “Mr. Reed." CONDENSED STORIES. ' How a Sharp Criminal Lawyer Wan a Dollar From Justice Duncan., Justice F. E. Duncan of Des QUICK WORK IN EL PASO. “They do things in a neat and workmanlike manner in El Paso, 1 * •aid a man who had been traveling I in the southwest. “1 was on a train When one da; Reeds” accident day tally the two "Mr. met in. her re ception room and the more illus trious of them, attracted by the beauty of his furry namesake, stooped to stroke lum and ask “What do you call him?” the lady had a bad quarter of a minute. She did not know just how the czar of the house of representatives would like the idea that a cat had been named for him. So she stum bled out a hastily invented fictitious name, and (he conversation passed to nptory voice sounded on I wav—“Mr. ReedI” “Mr. Reed!” it continued. “Are S ou in the parlor? What are you oing in that parlor?” Before any explanations could be made a white capped head was thrust in the door way and an angry looking maidserv ant cried, “Como out of that parlor, I tell you, Mr. Reed!” - It is not'on record that the cat seemed embarrassed.—Philadelphia Press. The Baker’s Romance. During a recent tour in Spain Mmo. Ella Russell received at her hotel every evening a parcel contain ing cakes, such as could be bought Moines, Is., gained some experience i com i„g j, from Mexico when a pas- and incidentally lost a dollar to a senger in the car I was in got into prominent criminal lawyer not long ■ — ago. The lawyer dropped into the justice’s court one day. “Are you ready to-take np the Ada Hailewood case?” asked the court. “Didn’t know it was set for to day,” replied the attorney. “Thought it was down for tomorrow.” “No, it was set for today, and the witnesses are here.” • “Well, let’s put it off until tomor row. 'We are not ready," pleaded the lawyer. “Can’t do that,” ruled the court. “We’ll take the state’s testimony to day, and you can put your witnesses ontomerrow.” '•But I don’t want to do that." “Well, you’ll have to do it" “Bet you a dollar you don’t taka the state’s testimony, said the law- FOR THE LITTLE ONES. The dame st Zoology Affords Much Amusement For Boys and Qlrls. This game will give all the more tenger in the car I was in got into amusement when played by boys a row with a negro porter. The . and girls, because they are not sup- lortcr hit the passenger. over the posed to be skillful artists. If their lead with a poker, and the passen- drawings, therefore, are somewhat S r took out his revolver and shat grotesque, all the better for the fun e porter six times. We took the j.of the evening, irter off the station at El Paso; if I say s “Is the bet still good?” “Yes; I’ll take it?’ other topics, when suddenfv a per-1 ^“^tnms^ Trtttete in 9 ““ 'the case against Ada Hailewood will rise and be sworn,” ordered 'the court. —- “No, you don’t 1” retorted the law- yer. “wo waive examination and will go to the grand juir. Give me the $2." And the court turned over the money.—Green Bag. jat an ordinary pastry cook's. One evening as she was leaving the hall she was accosted by a small individ ual, who took off his hat and bowed like a haughty. Castilian. He an nounced to the famous singer, much , to her surprise, ’that he had noticed j on- each of the twenty nights on which she had sung in “Lucia di Lammcrmoor” she had always gazed at him in his seat in the topmost gallery. His mother had a bakeiy In tho town. He was an only son, and placed his hand, his heart and his fortune at her feet. Won by a Photograph; A pretty story is told of the in troduction of the king of Portugal to his charming and clever wife. One day, when the crown prince, as he then was, was calling on the French ambassadress, his attention was arrested by the photograph of a sweet faced, fair haired girl on the mantelpiece. Taking up the photo graph to examine it more closely, he said to the ambassadress; “What a charming young lady 1" “Yes," was the answer, “and she is as charming as she looks. She is the Princess Amelie of Orleans.” On tho following day the prince was on his way to Paris, and a fort night later his engagement to the beautiful princess was formally an- . nounced to the world. Two Killers. It is a very rare thing for General Baden-Powell to be at a loss.for repartee, and his most humorous sayings are generally spoken in a low, even voice and with a serious look only belied by the twinkling of his eyes. At a luncheon party a celebrated doctor was chaffing him. “And how do you feel when you have killed a man professionally?” lie asked. “Oh,” said Baden-Powell imper turbably, “1 don’t mind it. How do you feel under the same dream- ^stances ?” i The Fastidious Clubman. An unusually bold London pick pocket tried to remove the valuables of a Piccadilly exquisite as he saun tered to his club one morning. The fastidious clubman seized the thief by the wrist, gazed at his filthy.paw and flung.it from him with disgust, •tying, "For goodness’ sake, my good man, wash your hands before you put them into a gentleman’s pocket." A Story of Qtorgo III, The death of Dr. Temple, arch bishop of Canterbury, last winter recalled the manner in which Arch bishop Sutton, who was at Lambeth . palace when Dr. Temple was bom, received his appointment from George III., says a London paper. One night after the death of Arch bishop Moore Dr. Sutton was en tertaining some friends' at the Windsor deanery. There was knock at the door, and the butler announced that a gentleman out side who would not come in was anxious to see the bishop. Impa tient at being disturbed, Dr. Sut ton 1mfried to the door to find the king. “How d’you do, my lord?” said King George. ‘I’ve come to tell you that you’re archbishop of Can terbury. D’you accept? Eb? Eh?” The bishop bowed, and “All right,” said the king. “You’ve got a party. I sec all their hatjLthcre. Go back to them. Good night.” Hit One Joke—but a Good One. ' Robertus IJove, secretary-treas urer of the American Press Hu morists, never sprung Orally more than one spontaneous joke in bis life, according to his own modest confession. One time years and years ago he was on a train passing through Bal- but he died before the ambulance came. I was told- to be at the in quest at 10 a. m. next day to tes tify watch was wrong, or some thing happened, and I didn’t get to the inquest until seven minutes past 10. As I was going in I met the of ficials coming out. “Too late,' they said. ‘He woe acquitted and discharged five min utes ago.' ’’—New York Tribune. What Causae Fires. The annual losses by fire in the United States, which have averaged as high 'as $100,000,000 a year at certain periods, were attributed dur ing a single year to the following causes, the number of fires from each cause being given: Incendia rism, 1,927; detective flues, 1,809; •parks (not-from locomotives), 716; matches, 636; explosions (of lamps, etc.), 430: stoves, 429; lightning 869; spontaneous combustion, 826; prairie and forest fires, 280] lamp and lantern accidents (other timn explosions), 238; locomotive sparks, 211; cigar stubs and pipes, 20 friction, 179; gas jets, 176; engines and boilers, 160; furnaces, 136, and f-jm irecrackers, 106. — Harper’s “The actor,” said Roscius do Hammo as he gazed over the sward at the summer hotel where he was resting, “should always forget that he has an audience. He should im merse his soul in his lines and”— “That’s all very pretty,” inter rupted Horatio Tiewalker. “It isn’t half so much trouble to forget that he has an audience as to forget that he hasn’t one.”—Judge. Ona Appreciated .Benefit. "Yes, the flood was a calamity, of course, but it did some good in our town,” said tho native. “You’ll have to show me,” com mented the stranger, looking at the scene of ruin around him. “Well, tie. had one old fellow in this town who was here during the high water of 1844. He’s quit talk ing about it.”—Chicago Tribune. Has Her Doubts. “A hone," said the lover of ani mals, ‘Is man’s truest friend.” "I didn’t know that,” answered young Mn. Torkins. “Judging from Charley’s experience at the race track, 1 thought a horse was the kind of a friend who borrows money and forgets to return -Washington Star. your i It"—' timore. Some one in the car look ed out at the scattered houses that I end the ultimate. slier untold 'suffer. A POSITIVE GUARANTEE. Signed by Seals Pharmacy Who Agree to Return Your Money If Dr. Oarlstedt’s German Liver Powder Fails . to Cure You. GUARANTEE I hereby scree to refund tl o monev paid for Dr. £*rlataadt’a German Liver Powder on the return of the empty bottles the purchaaer staling it has tailed to relieve and cure him of any of the diseases for which it ia recommended. This guarantee cor. era tho use of a SI bottle or four CSu bottles or]two months’ treatment. Signed: I)-. Carlstedt’sUer iiisnl, ver Powder * wonderful remedy, u prescription used lor over Bile years M an eminent German physician in hfs practice both in Emoye and this country and sod by thousands of druggists all over the world, tjj mildly natural arc the ef fect of th's remedy that all Kiduey and Liver, troubles give way to perfect bealtti. It'eures the worst cases and many have been cured ivno bad tried evely known remet y. Svtnptoinsof Liver Complaint: Die- pepsls, indigestion rheumatism, glint, sain eruptions, ssllowness, conuttpa- tioju dizziness, vertigo, lieu. I nolle, p .Ics, isin in the back, melancholy, bail ireatli. fnrrv tongue, horrid taste, un pleasant dreams, insomouit. undue sleepiness, nausea, fistulence.awaillng of the abdomen, colicky condition of the bowuis, pain and soreness In the stomach, liver spots on the skin, loss ormemorv. impaired yllnlitv.dlre fore bodlngs, lack of energy, indfctslon, crankiness, blood poisoning, nervous ness, falling hair—oh, there are lots of them end each one emphtsizee the importance of having Dr. Carlatedi’a German Liver Powder constantly with in reach It is the right thing at the right time, sure and certain in. effect pleasant a d perfect In action. For your own cake, don't neglect any ot the symptoms of liver disorder ilaf - — • Get a large sheet of white card- \ board and hang it on the wall. Now | give to each player a piece of all- j Couette paper about five inches { square and a- pencil. Tho paper ; should be black. on one side and . white on the other. j In one corner of the white aid* ! of the paper write the name of soma ! animal—a different one for each j player, of course—and also tho play er’s number. Direct the players j then’to draw with the pencil on the white side of the paper the animals assigned to them respectively, and when the drawings are completed to ; cut them out. | The lender of the gamo then col lects the figures and with paste or mucilage attaches them to tne card- ! board on the wall, the black side of 1 the figure out, and each figure with - its number beside it. — I Now give to each player a sheet j of paper with numbers, written down the left hand side, as many ! numbers a; there are drqwinge, and | ask them to write opposite to each ! number the name of the animal that i the numbered figure ia intended to ! represent. I Hero is where the fun comes in, I for many of tho drawings will prove | to be rather hard to make out. The i player who guesses tho greatest! number of animals receives the ! cardboard ns n prize. The “American fever” is spread ing so fast in Norway that the au thorities are becoming alarmed. The country is very sparsely settled, hav ing only about 2,000,000 inhabit ants. Of these 28,000 emigrated last year, mostly to America, and the indications are that that figure .vill be nearly doubled this year. The Deceased Wlfe’e Niece. In Australia a man can marry hit deceased wife’s sister, but the courts have decided that he cannot marry his deceased wife’s niece, The law which made the former marriage legal had omitted all mention of the The anomaly is probably ths result of an oversight Scored Heavily on Claranoe. “You young men ere so deceitful sad so insincere I” sighed the pretty maiden. “I don’t know what to isy. Clarence Hargus tells me I in worth my weight in gold. Think of the abeur"— “In gold!” exclaimed voting •more, with indignant fervor, atilla, you are worth your tin-radium 1" never had. tha ghost of a CASTOria Atbgelable frepataiionfcr As similating dtelbodandReffula- tingtheStomachs ondBowcBof mmm Promotes Digcstioii.Chrcrfu! - ness and Rest.Conlalns ncitlier Onium.Morphine nor Mineral. Not Narcotic. nnft^nua-siMvamaaR /I«yJA .W- ££Sti- lion, Sour Stomach.Dial Worms .Convulsions .Feverish ness and Lobs of Sleep. facsimile Signature of NEW YORK. EXACT COPY Of WRAPPER Tor Infants and Children. The Kind You Have Always Bought Bears the Signature of Use For Over Thirty Years CftSTQRIA D. & O. LOTT. Eeal Estate and Rents. We Advertise Extensively AND FREE AllJProperties listed with us Offices Johnson Block, Lott Street, 'Phone 55; Waycross, Ga. / trence never had. the ghost < •iUr that.—Chicago Tribu For Fresb, Wholesome Bread, Cakes, Pies and Rolls, Batronizr The A. P. PERHAM. JR. Notary Public, Evening Herald Office Telephones; office 35, residence rz Palace Barber Shop, Mary Street. V Ov Reynold* PKormrro*, Blmrlnp. HhnnipnQhiir. Hair f nttln* m In KInt Hem HtyIh. Polite nnd car*, jf ftil'n'twitlon, \ Waycross Bakery, Fritz L. Braun, Prop., Clean methods, {First class bakers. Let us serve you. Hot Rolls Every afternoon at 5 o’clock. Telephone No. 72, Cottingliain'Building. Waycross, Ga- or the complaint will become chrome lay on either side the railroad track and asked: “Is this the outskirts of Balti more?” - Just then the train whisked into a tunnel like a rabbit into its bar- row, and-Mr. Love shouted out glee- fulhr ia the darkness:. “No; it’s the underskirts.”—Bal timore American. Inc., I. DEATH The Seal* Pharmacy cm tell yon all /.bout Dr. CarlzMdt'a German Liver 'I'owder; it h.a cared ' many of their ccrtomer. who ar. recommending It <0 tn.lr IrienJ*. Batter than testimonial, la the guar antee coder which D-. CayleteiO'e German Liver Powder f. auld. If it doea not railave and core you It will coat you nothing, ao go at nnet and procure the remrdr and taka along thia guarantee. Contest continues 'until November loth. Read the Conditions All girls under 14 years of age living in thik vicinity may compete for the prize. i ..e Buck’s Junion Kange will be given to the girl who cuts out and brings us the greatest number of our ads containing Buck’s trade . marks-