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ijflB MERCURY, . aeoond-olM* mutter at the Sen- ‘^Wtl^toffloe, April 87, 1880. gMMnT m«. WorttafUM OMitf. ««. rnuonii JERNI6AN A SCAMOROUM. 1.10 per Tee;. THE MERCURY. A. .T. JERNIGAN, Pboprietor. DEVOTED TO LITERATURE, AGRICULTURE AND GENERAL INTELLIGENCE #1.50 PER ANNUM. WHITAKER dentist, —*11- OBMplfHIB) W« Tnu Cash. Ojloe *t hi« reeidenoe on Hard* Stoat*. April 1.1SS0._ B. D. EVANS, Attorney atLaw, u»n BMtanfltakOh DR. WM. RAWLINGS, Physician & Surgeon, Butanffl^Oe. Oflet at Om Surer Wo Hotel. April», l**®' E. A. SULLIVAN, NOTARY PUBLIC, Soadonrille, Ga. Special attention tire* to oollootion o Offlee in the Ooort.Houeo. 0. H. ROGERS, Attorney at Law, Sondenrflle, Go. Prompt attention given to nil horinam, Offlee In aorthweat room ol Oowt-Hoaaa. M», 1,1880 C. C. BROWN, Attorney at Law, BaiutanvtUa, On. WM practice in the Slate and United State* Court*. Ofloe in Cocrt-Hooaa. H. N. HOLLIFIELD, Physician & Surgeon, BnndrnirBle,Qo. Mm nast door to Mra. Bnjno’s milliaan •tore on Hanie Street DR. J. B. ROBERTS, Physician & Surgeon, »aH—rWe, Oa. Ihp be eoeenlted at hi* eOteo m> Hornea Dn«t, In the Maaonio Lodge hoUdiag, tram 9 '■to 1 p m, and from I to 8pm; daring otto boon at hi* reeidenee, on Ohnreh street, then not prolenioullv * April I 1S80. Watches, Clocks AND JEWELRY JERNIGAN. POSTOFFICE HOURS. 7:00 to 11:10 a. m. 1:80 to S:00 p. m. . K. A. 8piattan, P. M. Subscribe for the MERCURY, Only fl.40 per aumaa. PUBUSHKD NT JERNIGAN a SCARBOROUGH. BUY YOUR Spectacles, Spectacles, FROM JERNIGAN. Id^None genuine without our Trade Mark, On hand and for sole, Music, Music. 00 TO JERNIGAN roa nouns, accordeons, BOWS, STRINGS, —jOglN BOXES. CTC. Machine Needles, OIL and SHUTTLES broke, and new pleoee are wanted. JERNIGAN. »*I DHtMi POINTS. V'\ f *t'd into one f° n r ,/ ^mlfully.and instead of ertywding “ Blinl. aiZiff#,II a*, .nd 5 Ini. j a To STOOL dnrir. ,vitler a P a rt, have more ROOM 5> -a, beectna innr ,nuro u °urlhbuient from the soil, fci^avtrnra i produce better devoloped . , ?V"} ,or IHwitritod Pamphlet in mv bro»Uc t ' J,A * JOM ^YILMIHGTOH, j«L ?ith»o*ir P i. Ve , l ^ Cro i' one tillV,*! " ,unt ’ “bout 11 wcp b ago, *»nd 1 jW«£j ?‘ ,U8 ' Toni uil.{ S \"T r hcat whpr « 11 WM MU" 1 ♦wo of ti.* ? r<< h'rnL in i c 0 ““l measured some town, it mi ■•p'lin*."" 10 UM ‘ 8 "' °n r0 0l“AY , ?O^'“ r ' V ‘ *ltli ••ii-l., u'Vo Fanner." >v ,'•kowln. 1 "’’ »i ''i"*™’ lvll, -'»'. wEew I drilled 7. t»» no run,," 1,1,1 tlifm n fair 111 ' t;l ' A VT0.N', j„., m, piemaut, Del. The Country Boys. ‘ Ttiolioye arc coming homo to-morrow I mm our rural hostess n:ii<l ■ Wlnlo Lou and 1 exchanged quick ghmeea 1 nil of mingled fear and dread. Had wo hither como for quiet, Hither tied tho city's noire, lint to ohaugo it for tho riot' Of those horrid country boys ? Waking one with loud hallooing Early ovor.v summer's day, Shooting robbing, teasing kittmiM, Frightening the wrens away, ****«».* I wrote these lines ono happy summer; To-day I smile to road them o'er, Homombering how with anxious faces Wo watched all day the opening door. They came, " tho boys,” six feet in stature, Graceful, easy, polishod men ; I vowed to Lon, behind my knitting, lo trust no mother's word again. hor boyhood is a thing immortal, As each fond mother will agree j And sons aro “boys” to her forovor, Ohango as they may to you and mo. Now by tho window, still and sunny, Warmed hv tho rich October glow, Tlio dear old lady waits and watches] Just qh bIic waited years ago. For Lou and I aro now hor daughters— Wo married “those two country boys,” In spite of nil our sad forebodings Alxmt their awkward ways and noise, Dm springs up to moot a footfall, I list no luoro for coming foot; Mother and I aro waiting longer For steps on Beulah’* golden struct. Hut wlion sho blesses Lou's bolovxl, And seals it with a tender kiss, I know that loving words go upward, Words to another world than this. Always sho spenks in gentle fashion About "my Ikij'm”—she always will; Though one is gray and ono has vanished Hoyoud tho reach of time or ill. THE AVALANCHE. “ Away ! away! EJy for your lives. Tho gens-il’armos are already after yon!’ So the fugitives mounted their horses hurriedly and fled like the wind. A few friends stood looking after them from tho piazza of a country villa. About a mile away lay Milan, tho rising sun just coloring the spires of its churches and tho innumerable curved pinnacles of its Duomo. All around— far away on every side—extended the wide plains of Lombardy. To the north they wore bounded by lofty, inaccessible, frozen heights—the snow-crowned, the everlasting Alps ! The road went north, nd tow ard those lofty mountains the fugitives fled. There were three. There was an aged man, in whose veins the blood bad not yet been chilled by the hand of time; him form was erect and his face noble; there was a young man of strong frame and fine, resolute coun tenance, and between tho two rodo n fair young girl of extreme beauty. It is not necessary to tell tho story of tho old Count Alonzo di Vclletri and his laughter Laura. Sufficient it is to say that they belonged to tho ill-fated Car bonari, whoso plot hnd just been dis covered. The old man and Iuh daughter wore denounced, together with many others, among whom was young Henri, Count di Santana. But Milan wns not far from tho mountains, tho road was open—Switzerland wns the land of the free! Behind them no pursuers wore visiblo to thorn, but thoy well know they were followed. Two hours after they had left tho villa a company of gens-d’nrmes sped from Milan in pursuit of them. Tho villagers stared at tho gentlemen and the fair young girl who rodo.so furi ously; but there were none who inter fered. “ They ride for a sick friend,” said some. “ They fly from death,” said others. The geus-d’armes followed closely be hind, and at every village asked after tho fugitives. At every station they changed their horses for fresh ones, who kept up an undiminished speed. True, their horses wore but of tho common breed, and tho steeds of the count were noble Arabians, but tho constant freshness of the pursuers would prove more than a match for the over-ridden horses of the count, even though they were of the purest blood. They had ridden for hours in silence and without rest. Tho last look which they took behind them showed at a glance many miles of the road, but no pursuers. “ Laura,” said the young Count di Santana, “are you not almost wearied to death ? ” “ Oh, no. I can ride for many hours more,”£said thoyoung girl, courageously. “I wish we could turn into these fiolds on either side,” said the old count, “ for Laura’s sake. Site must be very weary.” “ But wo cannot,” said Santana. “ Wo cannot. Theso wide, level plains would discover us at once to our puvsu- crs. There is no chance for us but straight forward.” “ Yes, yes. The Alps,” saicl Santana. “ Yes, the Alps,” said all. On and on fled tho noble steeds, still bearing bravely up, although destitute of rest for many hours. “ Our horses are not tired yet, said the old count. “Thoy are good for many a mile.” But still lie looked anxiously behind . him. “Alas!” said Laura, “our pursuers, who cannot be far away, will have fresh horses constantly. Ours must fail at | last,” “ But if wo only can bo carried to tho Alps, all will be well,” “ God grant we may got there!” ex- 1 claimed thdgirl. I “ Yes, dear Laura,” said her father, ; “ on ce among the mountains and wo are | safe; for we can turn aside in a thousand wavs, and elude discovery as well as j pursuit.” j “ Ah!” cried Santana, at the lapse of j another hour, “ sec—far ahead—see, ! somethiug sparkles and glitters!" “Lago Maggioret" cried the old j count, in delight. “Is it tho lake! Oh, joy; we aro i near it, then!” j There before them, but yet many miles away, lay tho lake, its waters sparkling and glistening in the rays of tho warm mid-day sun. Boyond lay tho mountains, much nearer than at morn ing, for very many of tho miles that lay between Milan and the lofty Alps had been passed ovor by tho noble steeds. But thoy now began to show signs of weariness. They had gono far; they had | ridden fast. Foam covered their mouths, and their skins were reeking with sweat. Their pace was much loss light and I active than at first. They labored more heavily; yet still they went at a rapid rate, and there were no pursuers visible. Two hours more and the wearied travel ers wore riding along tho shores of Lake Maggiorc. Already tho level plains were far behind them, and hills arose on tho borders of the lake. They galloped wildly through the streets of Aruzzc; thoy rushed past tho shore where the Isolr. jViadre and Isola Bella rise from the transparent wave; they reach a ris- j | ing ground. j Santana was the first to look around. ] ] Ono glance drove the blood to his heart. ! He turned pale as death. Tho others j glanced immediately afterward. They | ; saw all. Their pursuers were visible, i ! They were but four miles behind. In the first moment of discovery not a word ! was spoken. They looked at one an- I other in silent consternation. Yes, thcro behind them their pursuers followed : swiftly and closely. Armed, numerous, unwearied, they .were close upon the track of their ffioble, unarmed and tired ; victims. With a simultaneous impulse they urged their wearied horses onward I at a faster pace. Tho Alps were not now far away. There they arose, their snowy crests ascending higher and higher tho farther back they ran, until they seemed to mingle with tho white ■ clouds of tho overhanging sky. “Alas!” cried the old man, “if wo j could but get there ! ” i On they went, hopefully, though de spairing. Thonged Vclletri looked at I his daughter with an aching heart. San tana, too, easting many a fevered glance behind him, seemed forever counting tho chaneos of escape. It was late in the afternoon, and tho sun wns near tho end- of his course, when they went on among the moun- ■ tains. The road went more steeply than i before—the horses grow more slow and : uncertain in their pace. Hark 1 at n | turn in the road, apparently but a short i distance behind them, what a thunder | tramp of rushing horsemen ! It is the 1 sound of their pursuers. “ The frontier is yet four miles I away!” cried Santana, with a look of agonizing suspense. “ They will ho up : to us beforo three. Wo are unarmed. Oh, if I had but a gun—but one pistol— I should at least liavo a struggle for my life!” “ Wo have no chance whatever of re sisting!” caied Velletri, whipping up I his horse. . “No use—no use!” said Santana. “ My horse cannot do it.” His horse staggered. He lashed the poor beast furiously. Useless; tho | horse had nobly done his duty; still true to his master, be struggled to obey and go forward, but only to fail. He fell headlong to the earth and lay mo tionless. Santana leaped from him. Velletri groaned. “ We are lost!” cried Santana. “Fly, fly, Valletri! Ely, Laura! I will keep them back for a time. Uso well what time is left. You may yet escape.” “No, no; let me stay—me. They will not, cannot harm mo! I am inno cent, Take my horse and fly. I will wait,” cried Laura, “ No, children !” cried Velletri, inter rupting them; “you-speak thought lessly. Wo can fly no further. We must leave our horses. Let us climb tho mountains. See—look up yonder ; we can find refuge there.” He pointed to a steep declivity, on tho summit of which there was a projecting crag. It lay five hundred feet abovo them. Instantly ho leaped from his horse, and Laura, too, dismounted. Then, as though the time was too precious for words, he led the way, leaving Santana to assist his daughter. Then tho fugi tives began their toilsome ascent. Tho way lay through deep and thaw ing snow. It was the month of March and all the snow was rapidly melting. All around, amid the solemn silence, they heard the solemn sound of falling The Nan ol Glass, avalanches. Trembling at the fearful A very extraordinary existence was noises which boded no good to them, j brought to a close n few days ago by tho they hurried onward. They ascended \ death of a man who was known ns tho two hundred feet, and then reached the | “ man of glass.” The records of tho foot of the declivity which they had no-! asylum at Bicetre, where the man died, tieod. There was a wall of rook rising j show that as long ago as in 1707, when precipitously for nearly a liundrod feet, j he was eighteen years old, a certain Jubissicr was brought to the hospital and then tho steep declivity went bade at an angle of forty-ftvo degrees for three hundred foot more, Here the snou r lay, n tremendous, accumulated mass, full forty feet in depth. Its white fuco shone terribly upon them as they walked underneath and saw the wator trickling in innumerable torrents, and tho vast mass abont to fall upon them. It seemed as though tho touch of a child’s hand might send the wliolo down in resistless fury. “ Haste—haste ! Oh, what a fearful journey. Here lies our only pathway through I ” cried Velletri. There was no answer as they nil pressed forward moro quickly. It took not long to pass beyond tho shelving rock. Then they turned upward to reach tho top of the declivity. Tho snow was vory deep where they walked. In some places rack* projected, afford ing a foothold, in others thero wore deep interstices. On tho right lay tho smooth expanse of snow which covered the declivity. They ascended quickly, and soon Laura's limbs failed her. The long ride had . weakened her; she trembled and sunk, after a vain attempt to go forward. Not a word was spoken. Their ex citement wns too strong—their feeling too deep. Velletri turned with an ago nizing look as his daughter fell, but Santana raised her iu his arms ami rush ed up with fitful exertions the remain Buffering from mental aliouatiou of a severe kind. His malady had been caused by a wound inflicted by a pane of glass, which foil on his bond; and beforo the out could be healed, the brain beeumo uffocted by a permanent disease. The sufle^er lapsed into idiocy, and then into madness of n moro violent kind; and lie was shortly afterward shut up in the asylum, where ho has remained over since. After tho first transports of delirium hod passed off tho man became moro calm, but he never got rid of the idea that ho was made of glass, and that the least shock or blow would eauso him to break in pieces. Ho rowained, thorofore, per fectly quiet and silent, being afraid oven to speak, for fear of precipitating the catustrophe which ho fancied was evor impending. For. eighty-three years he has led this singular existence, only once opening his lips in speech, when ho asked for a littlo tobacco. At ono other "period his intellectual and physical faculties appeared to be aroused, and that was when, during the siogo of Paris, ho could hear tho shells bursting in the nir at no great distance from his place of retreat. At this timo ho was seen to grow nervous and less lethargic, and to walk about restlosly humming some words which had no in telligible sequence or meaning. Ho sur vived, however, and, relapsing into his der of their way. They reached the i usual condition, hns so lived until the j summit. Panting, and almost fainting j ago of 103, testifying, in a somowhut with tho dreadful toil of tho ascent, j striking way, to tho effects of a totally they turned with a common impulse to ; placid ami inactive tranquillity both of look down. body and mind in prolonging life. No “Lost, lost!” ’ little credit is, however, due to tho an-. A choking sensation came to each, thorities of Bicetre for having thus pre- Tltey had not seen nor heard their pur- j served for eighty-three years an exist- suers, in the excitement of tho ascent, j cnee which from the first wns but their pursuers hiul hocii them. They j utterly useless and uninteresting.— had quietly dismounted and lmd reach-1 London Globe. ed tho foot of the mountain. Thev 11 — wore following their tracks. They saw how little hope was left. “Almighty God!” cried Vclletri, raising his eyes to heaven, “ Protector of the innocent, help us, for wo can no longer help ourselves 1 ” And lo 1 even as though in answer to the solemn praybr, they saw tho vast mass of snow slowly tremble. A liglit- Existing Orders of Chivalry. The orders of chivalry at present in ex istence number no fewer than 155, ex clusive of service medals and war dec orations, such as the Victoria and Iron crosses. Of all European sovereigns, the kings of Spain and Prussia are the most copiously provided with the means of distinguishing those whom ning thought darted to the mind of j they may delight to honor; for the for- oach. The thunder of falling avalanches ! , ner wvn diaposo of thirteen and the sounded all around. The vibrations of j lftttm . twelve orders of knighthood, their fall hnd loosened this. It seemed j France possesses only ono such order suspended but by a thread. Even as j —the German empire none. The most tho children of Israel looked back upon ; ft i 1( .j 0 nt existing order is that of St. the puisuing Egyptians, so now did the | Am1rcW) or the Thistle, founded in tho fugitives look back upon their foes. And they again cried unto tho Lord. Even as thoy cried again their foes wore visiblo. They came on quickly. They were at tho path which went under the declivity. They looked up and saw their prey. “ Ha, ha ! Ecco la !” cried all. They rushed on. Aiming their guns at their cowering victims, they tired a thundering volley. The echoes spread far and wide. Tho soldiers rushed un der tho declivity; and the three fugitives held their breath in awe—in horror. For the echoes of that discharge or its strong vibrations had shaken the treach erous snow. It trembled—it moved all in a mass ! Oh, Heavens, all in a mass. Millions upon millions of tons, it moved onward—downward 1 year 787, and the most modern is tho Takovo of Servia, the foundatory statues of which bear ditto the iifteeuth of February, 1878, Among the 155 or ders are ten exclusively bestowed upon members of the fair sex. Bix orders of chivalry derive their names from ani mals, only one of which, the dragon, is a heraldic and imaginary beast. The remainder, for the most part, commem orate the fame of patron saints or pop ular princes, only a few—conspicuous among which are the British Garter, the Austrian Fleece, the Saxon Coronal of Rue, the Swedish Sword, and ono or two others—owe their titles to more or less curious historical incidents. Charlie Ross. The father of Charlie Ross says that Hark! a hollow sound, then a deeper report, then a'rush as of an army; and ! tho last spark of hope has gono out, and then, with a long, loud, deafening roar ho mourns the lost ono as dead. Ho a roar liko loudest thunder, the whole • says: “ I have always believed that my mass descended with irresistible fury j Charlie, although only four years and downward, sheer downward, upon the j Uvo months old at the time lie was taken, heads of the doomed wretches beneath: , would remember his brother Walter, And as the echoes rolled around amid j "'ho was taken away with him, and had the Alpine eaves, there was mingled with i U I H0 thought that lie would even have the thunder and roar of tho avalanche, ! ft distinct recollection of the feeling of the smothered shrieks of the over- j lo neliness that he must have experienced whelmed pursuers. All was over. The rescued ones sang a song of triumph and of gratitude. Their pursuers’ horses were on tho road, and these soon carried them over the frontiers to liberty and happiness. The Chinese Barbers. The Chinese mode of wealing tho hair makes the flowery land the para disc of barbers, and the Chinese barber has not bis counterpart the world-over. From dawn he is in the streets carrying on his shoulders at either end of a long bamboo, adorned with an effigy of a chimerical creature, the paraphernalia of his craft. Eagerly on the look-out for any one whose poll is not perfectly shaven, as soon as he detects such an ono he has him in a trice installed on a stool beneath a largo parasol fixed in tho ground. In the twinkling of an eye Ah is ready, and the skull under his man ipulation soon becomes as smooth as ivory. This done he passes on to the pigtail, which ho brushes, perfumes and dresses with great care. The passions of men of society differ as much from the passions of the natural man as the fruits of a grafted tree from those of a wild one, when lie found he was in the hands of strangers and separated from his pa rents.” On another recent occasion, Mr. Ross said: “ The only tidings I have ever received of Charlie sinco he was stolen, was the demand for a ransom of #20,000. If I had paid that, I would have had him long beforo this. As it is, I have spent #00,000, and have not got him.” Worked Both Ways. “ I have a bill began a man, as he stood in the door of an office on Lamed street yesterday and looked over his file—“I have a little bill which ” “ Leave it with me and I’ll collect it if I have to follow the debtor a straight year,” interrupted the lawyer. “ Yes—here it is—bill for #10. It is a bill against you.” “Against me! Ah! that alters the case. You must give me a year to pay it in. Good-day, sir!”—Detroit. Free Press. A rattlesnake which was caught some six months ago in a harvest field fifteen miles south of Chatham, Out., is still on exhibition in a local drug store. It lias eaten nothing for five months, but seems fat and healthy, WONAN'S C0LUNN. \ IJenlul It crept I mi. Evening receptions, for some inseru- j tablo reason, ore iTevor vory popular in I New York society. Thero is an nnoer- j tainty about the success of these enter tainments which is in tho end wearing I to the hostess. A gentleman oneo bid- i den to a series of evening receptions j found himself tho first to arrive in the gentlemen’s dressing-room on tho occa sion of tho initial soiree. Lingering awhile for other guests to appear, he heard a stealthy trend at tho door, and to his infinite amazement saw the host peering cautiously into the room. “Is it you, my dear fellow?” asked his friend, in n tone of relief. “ Wo feared that it might bo a burglar I” This was not precisely tho looked-for greeting, or one calculated to put i\ guest at his ease.—Few York Hour. How lo Make t'ollon llrcsacn. Some of the prettiest have a Jevsey- slmpod waist, with low pointed throat, worn with a muslin ttohu. The open sIoovoh are turned up in monk’s sleeve style, Vicing caught permanently on the inside seam nearly as high as the elbow. Tho long overskirt, with wrinkled apron pointed deeply on tho left, and quite bouffant behind is sowed abovo tho edge of tho waist, concealing it, and giving the effect of an entire overdress. Tho part of the lower skirt visible on tlm right side is covered with many small flounces. Another figured muslin dress has « full round waist, worn with u narrow belts j and elbow sleeves edged with two rutflos. Tho long overskirt I has a box-pliatoil effect iu front, with j points on each side, and is worn over a i plaited skirt that lias no flounces. An- ! other pretty dress retains tho pelerine, ; or round capo worn with winter dresses, i This barely covers the shoulders, reach- j ing over the top of tbe armholes, and is j edgod with a striped border. The daisy I border is popular on dark percales, and ' is used to trim narrow flounces and to | border the deep-pointed apron or over skirt. A soft sash of those cottons is ; worn around the waist, pointed in tho front, and tied on tho left side, with the short wide ends cut off diagonally and , bordered.—J {upper's Bcuw. I-'iimIi Ion Pane lex. Mulberries aro in great demand for ! mourning bonnets. Dueliosse de Berry hats of black vel- I vet and jot are very stylish. Crushed roses of pink and crimson , will be worn upon spring hats. Tho most fashionable rings are of hammered gold, made iu pliable strips, and wound around tho finger. The monastic stylo ol' dress is much : in vogue, It is an exact copy of the : Trinitarian garb, except tho Maltese \ cross and headdress. Largo box plaits alternating with j clusters of knife-plaits are sometimes used for flounces and clusters of knife- plaits alternating with squares of bro cade aro considered in good taste. Although white is tho fashionable : color for evening a dress of plain white | silk marks its wearer as a person \ ignorant of style. At least two materials : must bo combined in eacli costume. Fashion decrees that little boys shall! remain in knickerbockers as long as pos-, siblo, that is to say, until they break out in open rebellion, and protest that they I will not go into the street again until : they have long trousers. A Worth walking suit recently import ed for a young bride has the skirt in : blue and tiger-tinted plushes. The fac ing of the rovers, sash drapery and sleeves of the basque are formed of blue satin. A wide cut jet fringe adorns the j tablier; pure gold blue enameled but- tons are used. Tlio entire cost of this rich costume was #135. NOTICE. • AU BtaWBiinrttan intended lor tkto paper moat bn accompanied with Urn foil name ol the writer, not neoenenrily lot pohH* cation, bat a* a ana ran toe of Rood laith. We are in ne way reaponaMe tor the view* •r opinion* d eewe*pendente. Lite’s Quiet Way. 1 clip high-climbing thoughts, The wings of swelling pride; Their fiito is worst that from - the height Of greater honor slide. Milk sails of largest size The storm doth soonest tear; 1 lieu so low mid small a sail As frooth me from fear. I wrestle not with rftgo While fury’s flame doth bum ; II is in vain to stop tho stream I'ntil the tide doth torn. Hut when tlio (lamo is out, And ebbing wrath dotli oml, I tnm a late enraged foe Into a quiet friend. And, taught with often proof, A tempered calm I And To be most solace to itself. Host cure for angry mind. ■Soutlaeelt. Words ot Wisdom. The body of man oppressed by excess | bears down the mind and depresses to j the earth any portion of the divine spirit i wo have been endowed with. How independent of money peace of conscience is, and how much happiness can be condensed in the humblest home. The beam of the benevolent eye givetli value to tho bounty which tho i hand disperses. When mankind estimate the value of truth by dollars and 'cents it would be ! good policy to drown t the world again. A wise man never triflos with nature’s ! laws or gets in their way, but tbe uii- { wise do, and their life pays the penalty of their folly. Give expression to every noble and ! generous thought. They will vibrate down through the centuries when we aro dust and ashes. A tender conscience is an estimable blessing; that is, a conscience not only quick to discern what is evil, but instantly to slain it, as the eyelid closes itsolf against the mote. Those who speak always and those who never speak aro equally unfit for for friendship. A good proportion, of the talont of listening and speaking is the base of social virtues, FUN. A correspondent ftslts us wlmt is tho relation of a university to an ordii,^ college. It is a step farther.—Boston Transcript. Josh Billiugs says that a good doctor is a gentleman to whom we may pay #3 a visit for advising 11s to eat less and oxeroiso moro. “ Tho crash has come at last,” iib the dry goods dealer said when the bale of toweling was dumped at his door.— Somerville Journal. They had women doctors in Egypt over 3,000 years ago. Who knows but the obelisk may bo a petrified M. D.— Few Yitrlc Commercial. The almanac crop was twenty per cent, abovo tho average, this year, and Home of them give directions to regu- lato your liver in nine languages. When a man comes from Michigan, they call him a Michigander. When a lady comes from tho same State, who is there that would dare to call her a Miehi-goose ?— Waterloo Observer. An exchange says : “ A um» died in Kentucky last week, aged ninety, who never saw a locomotive or entered a steamboat.” This may, in a measure, account for his long life.—Picayune. Some men say they don’t pay any at tention to what thoy read in newspa pers, and yot if you should see the wife of one of them chasing him over the back fenoo with a retired broom, some day, and put it in tho paper, he’d como around pretty quick to know if you had any business to meddle with bis homo recreation. -Middletown Transcript. We have received a copy of the Con- ijressional Record, a paper published in Washington, which is evidently a para graphic shoot, but we lmve failed to flnff anything funny in it. As an evidence of this, “laughter” is written in various places iu parentheses, to inform its realtors whore they should smile. W« don’t believe in any such “ funny busi ness,” and we must beg tho Record to excuse us from exchanging with it. Why doesn’t it add a calendar, and como out as a comic almanac?—Steubenville Herald, “Aro you fond of flowers ?” she in quired. “Vory much so,” ho replied. “ What aro your favorite flowers ?” she further inquired. “ Tulips,” he an swered, as his eyeSjdwelt admiringly upon the twin chomes Thnt woro parted in a ravishing smile, displaying “ teeth like ivory dipped in milk,” as Joe Brad ford says. Thero was a pause. A warm blush suffused her volvot cheek; the lily lids dropped, half concealing tlio starry eyes, and bIio murmured: “ If you were to ask mo which is my favorite ship, I should say a smack 1” Let us draw the curtain.—Somerville Journal. A Wonderful Record of Change. The changes which Fetor Cooper has witnessed include tho entire series of the national Presidents. AVluit a majes tic array of national dignitaries! He was born when Washington was in his first term, the presidential office being tbe old City Hall iu Wall street. Ho was six years old when Washington re tired at the close of the second term, and he was eight when the old hero died. He was thirteen when Burr killed Hamilton, and is said to be the only per son who can remember the latter. He was seventeen when Fulton made his first trip up tho Hudson in the Cler mont. The Erie canal was one of the * projects discussed when he reached manhood, though the war with Great Britain delayed it for ten years. His first vote was cast for Madi son, and he has been a regular voter ever since—a period of sixty-eight years. He was thirty-five when the first railway iu America was projected, and lie built the first locomotive of Ameri can manufacture. His wholo life has been identified with public improve ment, and he has been u leader in the ad vance of the age, having witnessed a grander march of progress than any other man in tho entire annals of the human race. Probably tho most won derful of all those improvements is the telegraph, which will always bo one of the marvels of science. The next is the progress of journalism.—New York Letter. Pennsylvania has 10,000 more female# ^ than males.