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by p. c. Pendleton. Davoted to Literature, Internal Improvement, Commerce, Agriculture, Foreign and Domestic News, Amusement, Slc. jc. r. iianleiter, printer. VOL. I. THE s® tuff SI IB 33 sy I? ©SI* is published in the city of Macon every Saturday Morning, at three dollars in advance, four dollars at the end of the year—two dollars for six months; and mailed to country subscribers by the earliest mails, enveloped by good s'rong wrappers, with legible direc ti ms. OCr No subscription received for a less period than six in >.iths—and no paper discontinued, until all arrears are paid. Advertisements will be inserted at the usual rates of advertising, with a reasonable deduction to yearly ad- Wr Any person forwarding a ten dollar bill, (post paid,) shall receive four copies for one year, to be sent to different persons, as directed. letters, on business either to the Publisher or Editor, must come post jmid to insure attention. L NEW LIVERY STABLE. TITHE subscribers respectfully inform the public that Ji- they have opened anew Livery S able, on the alley leading from Second to Third Street, the place formerly known as Bell’s Stable, and wheiethey will keep first rate Horses, Carriages, Baruutkie, and care ful Drivers. Persons visiting this place with droves of Horses or Mules, would do well to cull, as it will he to their interest to stop w ith us. Horses taken to board at the usal rates H. R WARD, \V. V. WAG NON. sept 29 49 LEMON SYKEP. «.f \4 A DOZEN Lemon Syrup, very superior.— W y*o, 50 dozen Stouphlon's Bitters, for sale by HARVEY till* TW ELL, Druggist, Opposite the Central Hotel. June 16 34 Dr. *<t iLUi t LI. I.rated Eye Water for In tlanmtiok .tjid Weakness of the Eyes. f I MIC great advantages of this infalible remedy places X it as a general appendage to families, ami a con stant radc-mn um to the traveller. Tins Eye Waer is prepared with the greatest care, and has never been known to fail in effecting a speedy and safe restoration of the diseased organs. It is useless to attach any cer tificates by way of praise or recommendation. The reputation and immense, sale tiiat has attended Dr. Scudder’s Eye Water, is the fairest proof of its utility and beneficial tendency ; it has been the means of preserving sight to many of the afflicted, from the help less infant to the aged parent Thousands of le ters have been received by Dr. S. within these few y« ms, containing flattering remarks relative to this Eye Wa ter —and the cures effected by it, have been set forth as wonderful beyond precedent. Dr. Scuddcr confulen ly recommends this Eye Water as a safe and valuable remedy—and he trust that Ins experience as nti Occn list, to weigh against the gross impositions which are daily practised on the public by advertisements of dif ferent kinds of Eye Wa er, many of w hich are unsafe to use. Prepared by Dr. John Scudder, Occuhst and inser’er of Artificial Human Eyes. A simple of »he a bove Eve Water, for sale by II- SHOT WELL. IFT Merchant in the country supphed at tin Pro prietor’s price. March 10 20 Carpenter's Embrocation for Horses. f’OR rhe cure of Swellings, S’rains, Bruises, Galls e S illness ol T. ndour and Joints, &.c. Ae. Tliis Embrocation is recommended to Farriers and o’hers w ho .visii a remedy for diseases above mention ed For safe bv J. H \ IP. S. ELLIS Septeml 4 ts SANDS* REMEDY For sill I ill rum. Ring Worm, Tetters, Scald Ilc id. liar rr’.s Itch <s-r. flllHS rente It- is a e unbitmtioD lu r. ".o" re unknown A in the annals of medicine. It is the production of much experience, deep research, and great expense, and is offered to the public in the fullest confidence of its being an effectual, safe and speedy cure for 1 1 ♦ St.lt Rheum, and all other diseases of the skin, such a c Titter, Rintf Worms, Seuld Head. Barber's or Jackson lh It, if'. These diseases are kno* n to be the most obstinate < f any to which the human system is subVe*, a id can on ly be thoroughly eradicated by persevi ranee in the right course of treatment, and by using the right medic me Such a medicine has been discovered in this remedy, and we speak from onr own knowledge and exp< rtenee when we say, dint in forty-nine cases out of fitly it w ill effect a permanent and rapid cure by attending to the accompanying directions for use. Sold by J. 11. df IP. S. ELLIS, Cotton-Avenue. March 21 22 Orris’ Tooth M ash. \ SUPERIOR article for the Teeth and Gums.— The concurrent testimony of the most eminent dentisis and members of the medical faculty, are united in favor of this article. For sale bv J. 11. W. S ELLIS, Agents, March 10 20 Cotton-Avenue. ALL persons indebted to the subscriber, either by note or open accoun’, are verv respectfully iavitftr? to call and settle the same. WM. 13. JOHNSTON. January 20 13.f CITY LICENSES. TJERRONS wishing any description of Licenses, can X obtain the same bv application to me, at the Post- Office. JESSE L. OWEN, Clerk Council. January 27 H NEW STRING GOODS. f' 1 EO. C. McNEILL is now receiving at his stand * in Messrs. Rea & Cotton's fire-proof buildings, Commerce Row, his Spring and Summer supplies of Fancy and Staple DRY-GOODS. Among which wil' be found some desirable selections, adap'ea to the pre sent, and approaching seasons. Purchasers are invited to call and examine for themselves. April 14 Sstf LAW NOTICE. S. M. STRONG AND P. C. PENDLETON HAVING formed a co-partnership in the practice of the Law, will attend the several Courts of the Flint Circuit, and these of Tw iggs and Wilkerson, of the Ochtnulgee. 03“ Office in the west end of Cow es’ brick building, Commerce-Row. March 31 J23_ Bacon ! Bacon I ! Bacon !! ! "I AWW4 POUNDS Baror. for sale bv lU.UUU REA Sl COTTON August Iff TO RENT, fIT WO large front Rooms on the second story of our J stores, on Th rd-street, suitable for sYepirg apart ments or offices. Possession given Ist of Or to! er rext. For terms apply to REA &. COTTON. July 21 39tf II A C O N 05-AND PURE LEAF LARD, ItA LBS. choice Bacon, most of which ■ D*lU has been cured here, on the nios approved principles. 4,000 Leaf Lard, put up in neat covered tin cans, suitable for families. Appfv to WM. B. BARKER & CO. February 24 18ft FOR RENT. LIMIE brick Store on Third-street, adjoining the sub • seribers’ (formerly occupied by Williams & Brad ley.) Possession given Ist ol Oc'olier rex' For terms apply to REA &. COTTON. July 21 39:f MACON, (Ga.) SATURDAY MORNING, OCTOBER 13, 1838. POETRY. * r ~-- : . ....., r ro MY COMPANIONS. WRITTEN ON LEAVING COI LEGE —BY O. W. HOLMES. Mine ancient chair—thy wide embracing arms Have clasped around me even from a boy; Hadst thou a voice to speak of years gone by, Thine were a tale of sorrow and of joy, Os fevered hopes and ill-foreboding fears. And smiles unseen, and unrecorded tears. And thou my table—though unwearied time Has set his signet on thine altered brow, Still can I see thee in thy spotless prime, And in my memory thou art living now; S >on mils' th >u slumber with forgotten things, The peasant’s ashes and the dust of kings. Thou melancholy mug—*hv sober brown Hath something pensive in its evening hue. Not like the things that please the tas'eless clown. With gaudy streak oforange and of blue ; And I must love thee, for thou art in*nc own, Pressed by my lip, and pressed by mine alone. Mv broken mirror—faithless, yet beloved, Thou who canst smile and smile alike on all, Oft do I leave thee, oft again return, 7 scorn' the siren.but obey the call; . I hate thy falsehood, while I fear th v truth. But most I love the, flattering friend of vouth. Primeval carpet—every well worn thread Has slowly parted with its virgin dve; I saw thee fade beneath the ceaseless tread, Fainter and fainter in mine anxiouseye ; Ro flies the color from the brightest flower. And 1 icaven's own rainbow lives but for an hour I love you all—there radiates from our own A soul ihat lives in every shape we see ; There is a voice, to other ears unknown. Like echoed music answering to its key. The dungeoned captive hath a tale to tell, Os every insect in his lonely cell, And these poor frailties have a simple tone, That breathes in accentssweet to me alone. MIS CELLA NE O U s7~ -—’■■■ ■■ ■ ■ - - From the Knickerbocker. A HOTEL DINNER. From notes in pencil, on the back of a Dill of Fare. Dow stalling is the sound of the dinner gong! T. e tympanum suddenly recoils be neath the swell of the brazen instrument, and eciioes the. alarum to its fellow member of the lower house, of which Appetite is the speaker. In a large lioiel, t e effect is magical. What a rush from all quarters of the house to the dining room ! Chambers, offices, and closets, are hastily deserted by their occupa ts, that the tic rents of an unspeakable hurly-burly may mingle at the A tile d' hole. Loungers in the street catch the sound vv.M wonderful acuteness, and hasten homeward to the hotei. The boarder under The barber’s hands fietsat the practitioner’s slowness, gets cut, while ut tering a violent oath, starts up, looking dag gers, and w ping the soap hastily from his half-shaved chin, seizes his hat, and rushes to the place of fe ed. In ot.e dense crowd, they pour in at the door; pushing and squeezing, jostling and swearing, as if life itaell depended upon the celerity, of (heir entrance. Dignity is nothing, de< e. cy is nothing. A choice seat tit the table ■is every thing. The twenty or thirty individuals who tire already seated at the head of the board, and in the immediate vicinity of the choicest eatables, are ‘okl heads;’ they have ‘cut their eye teeth;’ they are ‘up to snuff;’ or, to cut tiie classics, and descend to homely English, they know how to live in an American hotel; an accom plishment by no means to be lightly regarded. Every day, about half an hour liefbie the din ner-hour, they station themselves near the door of the dining-room, and with a patience worthy of Job, await its opening. Barely does John, tile waiter, have time to sound the gong, the notes of which I have said are so magical, before they dart by him, and the last vibration of the brazen monitor finds the men of brass seated at the table. Some unsophisticated persons may think this a contemptible subser viency to the appetite; if so, they do the worthies much injustice. Their motives are of a high order ; an honor to themselves, and a great light to the world. Example is every thing. Punctuality is a jewel. Washington said so, and he was a man of veracity. The hour to dine, as specified in the rules and re gulations, posted up in the ‘office,’ was three. Not one minute before nor after three, but three precisely. Some inconsiderate man may think a minute or two out of tiie wav could make no material difference. Do n’t trust such an one with the conveyance of vour wife and five small children to a steam boat pier ? Ten chances to one'fie misses the boat. ‘ Time is money,’ and two minutes |qr annum. At this rate, supposing a man to live seventy years—a fair computation when we consider the caoutchouc case of Joiee Heth—thirty-five days, eleven hours, and four sixtieths, are wasted in a life time, by being two minutes behind han lat dinner! Shades of Washington, Franklin, and Dr. Alcott! — what a dissipation of money ! It was of this that the men at the door ruminated. They wished, like Washington, to set a good exam ple, in being punctual. If, in virtuous striving to excel in such a cause, they tread on each other’s corns, and tumble over each other's heels, making themselves appear excessively ridiculous, it is our busii ess not to laugh at, but to condole with them, as martyrs who suf fer for our sake; Many a gouty toe lias been • round into torture, in its owner’s- generous emulation to be the first and most punctual at ! the dinner-table. W uat disinterested mart) r dom ! The crowd have squeezed themselves into ! the loom. Sueh a scramble and jostling for seats! Spare the crockery. The lin—from din conies dinner —redoubles. Suc.i an out cry ! Babel is music to it. ‘Waiter!’ Wai ter !’ ‘John!’ ‘Waiter !’ “Thomas!’ ‘Thomas !’ ‘Waiter !’ ‘John !’ “Thomas !’ “Soup !’ ‘Soup !’ ‘Soup !’ were iterated in all octaves, fioni con tralto to soprano. 1 was a ‘looker-on in Vienna,’ when the scenes which follow oc curred, and I ‘ speak the things which I do know.’ ‘ Give us a stout, hearty plate of sotip, Wil liam !’ said a short, crimson-faced man, with an abdominal periphery like a semi-globe. As he gave this order for a second [date of soup, he shoved into the waiter’s hand, open to re ceive the plate of a gentleman who had as vet secured nothing, his own dish, and bade him make haste. Iguorunt of ‘ dinner etiquette*,’ as Fanny Kemble styles it, a dozen of tho>e around us hid at once commenced on the solids ; which of course made the rest work like beavers to finish their soup ; and s< me of tho,e at the end of the table, who, having but just received the initial liquid, vvere still sip ping after their luckier fr onds at the favored head of the table had concluded, were admon ished of the necessity of making haste, by the removal oftheir plates by the impatient vvai- j ters. Waiters are systematic. People should j be mote simultaneous in eating soup. A polite man swallows his, scalding hot, that he may keep peace with his more fortunate neighbor. ‘Here! Here!—you rascal,bring back my soup !’ bawled out a man with a thin, vinegar aspect, llis plate had suffeied abduction. The waiter feigned not to hear. The wr n kies on the pungent face visibly sharpened. That look would have soured an entire dairy. In a voice thin and sharp us his features, he exclaimed: ‘Here! here! you unmannerly Irish scape-goat ! (ah you hear at last do you ?) bring back my soup, instantly !’ ‘lt ’s ag’in’ the rules Sir-r ; I can't do it, Sir-r ! But here’s a beautiful arrangement!’ replied the Irishman,pas ing a bill of faro. “ D—n you and your rules, and your bill of fare, in a mess! I want my soup, you Irish blackguard !’ ‘C .n’t do it, Sir-r ; the rules must be oh. served. Can’t give ye any mote soup, Sir-r; Hie m dcs is on, Sir-r ; them must liq ate nixt; them’s the rule, Sir-r ;’ and the waiter ran to answer a cal! farther up the table. Tiie discomfitted man swore as terribly as if he bad formed one of the celebrated army in Flanders. ‘Pretty hotel, this ! Excel!* nt re gulations ! Polite servants! Must, eit meat, must 17 I’ll see ’em hanged first! Here,you chowder-head, J bring back my ’ “G*een peas, gentlemen—green peiis !’ j squeaked a bean-pole waiter, with a nose like a sausage, and little twinkling eyes. A dozen i hands grabbed convulsively at the dish. G een peas vvere a great rarity; a fact sufficie tlv evinced by the complacent air of the serv ant, as tie announced them. A dish of gravy and a bottle of catsup were upset in the scuffle, j much to the annoyance of tiie sour man, in ; whose lap •• greater part of the' first sought a depot. ‘ You have got your soup, 1 j find, Sir!’ said a wag, opposite, at which' every body laughed, and" one individual, j at an untimely moment, when his mouth j was full of Scotch ale, whereby a great gurg. j ling and spluttering ensued, ending hv a gen- j era! spirt upon the ‘fixitts’ of all who were near ' him ; a nio’st impartial division, for all receiv. j ed a portion. As soon as he could make him- J self heard above the discord, the person to J whom the wag’s remark had been addressed, j answered, with much asperity, “That’s Irish wit, I s’pose; 1 hate Irish!’ ‘Peas, waiter !’• Waiter,peas ! ‘Peas! peas!’ exclaimed a hundred voices in a breath. Rea sonable souls ! They looked to be all helped J at once ! ‘Pass those peas ?’ said a score of impatient I voices to the gentleman with the crimson face, who in the scuffle had succeeded in securing j the dish to himself. ‘Ha,ha!’ he spluttered, complacently, with his mouth half full of salmon, ‘I liave’nt eat any of these ’ere for a long while *’ .‘Tiiey look very fine !’ said the next but one adjoining, in a manner that implied a strong de sire to ascertain whether they did not taste j respectably. - *. ‘Very, very!' replied the fat man. as he scopped nine-tenths of all there vvere in the dish onto his own plate. Sundry eyes glanced j pitchforks tit him. They were evidently as- | tonished. They should cot have been. The gentleman can e fiom a western pork-growing district. He fattened his own swine. * I’m special fond of peas !’ said lie half in e thusi. asm at his own appetite, and half as a sort of an apology. ‘ Split me, if I should n’t think so!’ exclaim* ed the w’ng. ‘Well, it’s nothing strange!’ snapped out Vinegar, taking the part of the obese, and chuckling at the discomfiture of the others ‘Some people will eat, until, being unable to help themselves, we shall be compiled to lilt them out of their seat!’ exclaimed one of the disappointed, giving the fat man a look that was not to be misconstrued. I looked about me for some pens, but saw none. As 1 was scrutinizing, my ey es en countered ti e rueful and bewildered face of a modest young man, with an empty plate. In all probability, he had never dined befi re in a hotel ; nt least, the diffident manner with w hich In- received the inattention paid to his modest requests, seemed to say as much. A constant tear, too, lest he should not behave quite like the rest, appeared to haunt him ; and the lon ger he was neglected, tl© more he apj eared embarrassed. Poor fellow! He had not yet received a mouthful to eat. What a bore is modesty ! Brass is, emphatically, an accom plishment. The young man looked very ri diculously for the lack of it; and I pitied him. ‘Waiter!’ said I, winking peculivrly to an Adonis with squint eyes, aud a mouth like a codfish. He sprang to my side. The wink had touched his feelings. I knew it would A waiter’s heart is open to a wink, w hen words are useless. ‘ Get me some peas, and fresh salmon, on a clean plate.’ The fellow’s eyes concentrated into their deepest squint, ns he looked inquiringly, first into iny face, and then at the space between mv thumb-and foi e-finger. Apparently not seeing there what he had expected, his sprigbt ly, helpful manner died away very suddently, and his answer, as he stared mechanically up the table, was unqualifiedly brief. •Guess there ar’ n’t any here ; do n’t see any.’ I pointed to my thumb and fore-finger. A quarter.dollar filled the space lately vacant. ‘ Do you sf>e any vow ? The mouth opened wide, and assumed an amiable grin, and the eyes an extra squint,and for half a minute glanced scrutinizing!/ around the table. ‘ I think I does !’ said lie. Ilis sight was completely restored. ‘ I thought you vvojild,’ said I, dropping the coin into Iris horny palm. What wonders the ‘•rod of ail evil’cun accomplish! It makes the best vegetable pills in the w;orld,and ‘ may ! be used with equally astonishing success in all ■ climates.’ ‘ 1 lere! you squint-eyed rascal!’ roared out Vinegar, who for the last ten imputes had been unceasingly cursing every servant within hearing, ‘I saw you tukethut lii ibe ! Bring me my soup, or I’ll expose you. Pretty joke ! Have to pay land ord exorbimrit charge for dinner, am then pay, beside, a lubberly set of lanthorn-iawed waiters for helping you to it! I won’t submit to such treatment, and those who will, are ninnies! I won’t stand it,. I’ll make them change their tone. 11l publish the landlord. I’ll blow bis hotel to the devil. I’ll—l’ll I’ll have my soup! Here you laughing hyena, w ithjour teeth out of doors, bring me my soup!’ The disinterested servant brought me the peas and salmon, with great alacrity,and looked as it he wpuld like to have the silver dose re peated, but I had no farther use for him, and sttired coldly upon hisenthusiasni. He was a’ philo jopher, and a deeply-read student of hu man .nature. He undei stood that cold look, as readily as he had done the wink, and, to adopt a western phrase, quickly ‘absquatula ted.’ Helping myself to a portion of the viands which 1 had lieen so fortunate as to ob tain, I passed the remainder to my .modest neighho -. He appeared very grateful, but was too much embarrassed tliat)k|’o me. Hay ing helped himself to salmon, he was proceed, ing (leisurely, lest he should seem indecorous,) to take som t peas, when the dish was uncere moniously seized, aid carried to the obese, who had bribed the waiter with a shilling to execute the manoeuvre. Whereupon my mo. dest friend looked very blank, and Vinegar took occasion to dilate sarcastically upon the ex; ense ofleeding pigs in the west; in which the fit man, unsophisticated, and seeing no allusion, coincided with fervor. Hc,had swine to sell, and crying up the expense of fattening them, would tend to increase their value in the rnaiket. And here ensued a confab, between the wag aud the obese, in which the latter was made the unwitting butt of a thousand and one small shafts, touching his professional anJ personal affinities. ‘Clear the tables !’ sang out the authorita the voice us one decked in a short white apron, who brandished, in a masterly manner, a huge carving.knite and fork. This was no less a personage than the head-waiter, or, ‘ butler,’ as he directed his follow-servants to style him. lie knew the responsibility of his situation,and filled it with gieat dignity. His own talents had raised him, step by step, from the com paratively low' office of a knife-scourer and cook’s errand-boy, to the high stand which, knife in hand, he now occupied. His history is an excellent illustration of the old maxim, that ‘talent, like water, will find its level.’ “I could dwell upon ihe hopes end aspirations of the low ly knife-scourc ; his surcharged bosom overflowing in the lonely watches ofthe night, as he plied his rag and ‘rotton-stone;’ his longings for the birth of porter; the attainment of liis wi-h; his enthusiasm upon his first debut with Day-and. Martin ; his still craving ambi tion ; in short, his whole rise and progress,and final attainment to that pinnacle "of usefulness, the situation of head waiter. My modest neighbor, supposing that tiie last-named order was intended as an insinua tion that the guests had ate enough arose and walked off. Upon reaching the door, and turning round, h * seemed to perceive his mis take, and that the order was but for the clear anceof the meats, to make room for the pas try ; but, ashamed to expose his ignorance of ‘ etiquette,’ by returning to the table, he left the room, hoping, I doubt not, from the bottom of his soul, th; t those he had left behind him would ascribe his withdrawal to surfeit rather than ignorance. He probably adjourned to a neighboring eating-house, to appease his tanta lized appetite. „ * What pudding is this, waiter?’ said a gen tleman opposite. ‘lt’s a pad-ding, Sir-r,’ was the satisfactory reply. ‘We know it’s a pudding, but what kind of a pudding is it ? Find out what pudding i it is.’ | ‘That aisily done I’said he, as with the ut mast sung froid lie perforated the crust of tl e doubtful dish with his dirty thumb. ‘Sure, gintlemen, it’s a rice !’ ‘ You ignorant ape!—do n’t you know fet ter than that? You ought to he lynched !’ *He would lie, if he was in our parts!’ said the fat gentleman, swallowing a glass of chum • pagr.e, which lie had taken, uninvited, from my bottle. ‘Look here, cabbage-head!’ said Vinegar, tweaking the offender’s ear; ‘bring me my : soup!’ I left the table, i! was my last hotel dinner. SPECIMEN OF RHETORICAL EMBELLISHMENTS. TIIR RErARTEE. It is a fine day.—lt generally is when a viper is abroad. Madam ;my lord is dying for you.—l wish he was ; and that he may never importune me on the subject of love. A loquacious blockhead, after babbling some time to Aristotel, observed, that he was fearful he was obtruding on his ear.—No, no, repl.ed Aristotle, I have not been listening. A qunker, in a stage-co:ich with an officer, observed tiiat his sword was very troublesome. All my enemies are of the sameopiui.au, re plied the captain. A .link-bov, one very dark evening, asked Dr. Burges, the preaclier, if he should have a light ? No, rcpjied the doctor, lam on.c of the lights of the world. I wish then, replied the lioy, that you were hung at the end of the alley w here Hive, for it is very dark. THE ANTHBORISMUS. A figure ly which n person renders the propo sition of another of counter effect. Turpin took my mare from the stable, and rode to York, without my knowledge and con sent : which I term a lelony.—-It is true, he did so ; but* it was no theft; lor he rode her to your yard again, and tied her to the rack. Charlotte, it is my duty as a parent to inform you, th it you are sitting by a man of very profligate character, w ho wall mar your reputa tion.—Papa; Vice placed near virtue, makes Virtue more lovely, strong and clear. You might have had a deal more whit, papa, had you been governed by inv mnnima.-Child ! b’er who is governed by his w ife* has no wit at ail. . „ . ... a nr. bon mot. Brackley Kennet,.who was lord, mayor of London in 1780, was originally a waiter: and when summoned to attend the privy council, Jo answer for his pusillanimous conduct during the riots, his arrival was announced to the .council-chamber. Ring the hell, said Lord North, and let him attend us. In a recent duel between two lawyers, one them had shot away the-skirt of the other’s coat, ilis second observing the truth of his aim, de clared that had his friend been engaged with a client, he w ould very probably have hit his pocket. THfi DOUBLE ENTENDRE. Two ivacious girls,entering the pump-room at Bath, mot a short, fat, ruddy, coarse lady, retiring. Here i§ beef a-la-mode coming out, said one of the girls—this is usual, replied the dowager, to make room for the gahafe ! The roses on your cheek were never made To bless the eye alone, and then to fade; Nor had the cherries on your lips their being, To please no other sense than that of seeing. THE ANECDOTE. A conceited juvenile puipit-performer im portuned (on some anniversary ) the bishop of iiis dioeess to allow him to preach. I have uo objection to permit y ou, said the bishop, but nature.will not. An officer in a dragoon regiment, at a re view, lost his hat. by a gale of wind. A pri vate dismounted, and presenting it to him on the point of his sword, accidentally made a puncture in it.—D it,Sam. I would sooner tiiat you had pierced my arm. Why so, colonel ? Because I have credit with my sur geon, but none with my hatter. THE IMPRECATION. May heaven’s dreadful vengeance overtake him ! May the keen storm of adversity strip him of all his leaves and fruit! May peace for sake his mind, and rest be banished from his pillow ! May his days be filled with reproach, and his nights be haunted with remorse! May he lie stung by jealousy w ithout cause, and maddened by revenge without the means of execution! and, may all his offspiing be blighted and perish, except one, who may grow up a curse to his old age, and bring his hoary head with sorrow to the grave ! THE DILEMMA. Why should he be so sharply rebuked? If be has done wrong, a mild admonition would be better : if he has not done wrong, reproof will fall on THE PROCRASTINATED CLIMAX. What is your name ? said a gentleman to a porter. Mv name, replied the fellow, is the same as my father’s. And what is his name ? said the gentleman. It is the same ns mire. Then what are both your names ? Why, they are both alike, said the porter. A fellow who was tr : ed at Dublin, for some private offem e. received the following sentences Judge—The sentence of the court is, that you be flogcred from the bank to the quay. Priso ner__Thank you. my lord ! you have done your worst. Judge—And be flogged back again. NO. 51.