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EXCELilOa. Republicans may think it ill That old York Bute. “Executor” atill. Will spend the winter out in the cold. Pondering on the lies they told. Excelsior! The bloody shirt is ripped in two— John Bhenuan's yellow phiz, 'tie true They say has turned a vivid blue. Excelsior i Now let brave Foral.c r homeward prowl— A whine succeeds his deep-toned growl— We'll rip and snort and mako Rome howl l Excelsior i And Davenport—well, I should smile— As a sure reuiet.y for his bile, Oh, let him gnaw a large-size die. . Excelsior t SIC SLMPKB TYKANMU. Go tell tbo ruffian rabble rout The Readjlister's petered out; So is the time of tyrant*. Now Virginian hearts no longer bow. Though bate and malice pressed her sore. The Old Dominion's safe once more; Sweeps from the mountains to the sea The mighty shout that welcomes Lee. Mahone may say the record lies. And may contest, but 'tls not Wise; Tbo eUndered South don't care two bits— For didn’t they give the old man FiU! Americus, Ga. M. M. Folsom. A BEAUTIFUL WOMAN. Wickedness Which Makes n Hook Agent Seem an Angel. They were sitting, h number of kindred spirits, spinning yams in n law office in Louisville, says tlio Courier-Journal. The conversation had turned upon the snbjcct of beautiful women and where the hand somest women were to be found. There was a great diversity of opinion expressed, the majority stoutly maintaining, of course, that the girl par excellence wna not to he aeon outside the glorious .sovereignty of old Kentucky. “Gentlemen," remarked the old Colonel, who hnd been appealed to for hia views of the situation, “the most perfect figure and prettiest face I ever saw were in the wilds of Arkansan-. A party of us were out hnnt- inga>ver in the swamps between the White and the Arkansas rivers. Toward sunset wo came to a deep and muddy bayou, which we knew at a glance it would be im possible to ford. On the opposite side a canoe of the ‘dug-out’ pattern, indigenous to the country, wag moored. Away behind tho trees a blue wreath of smoke curled <piietly heavenward, marking tho place where some settler bail built big cabin in tho lonely vrnste. Atter a series of yells from our guide that would have fefiectcd credit on a Comanche bravo about to tike the war path, a woman glided down to the bonk on the other side, grace fully seated herself in the canoe and com menced paddling toward ns with strong, swift strokes. As she neared tho place where we were standing we all saw she was young—not more than 19—and with a face of surpassing loveliness. Her complexion was of that perfect brunetto type only to be fourd in those whose ancestors for many generatious have lived liencnth sunny slues; her checks hnd the indescribable tint so often seen on tile sun-kissed tide of a ripe poach; hermonth was exquisite, with pout ing lips like twin cherries; her hair floated down her bock in silkeu. shining, wavelets nearly to the^ronnd, and her eyes! ah, gen-’ tlemen, how shall I describe tho midnight splendor or the transcendent glories to be scon in the liquid depths of those dark orbs. “As she stepped lightly out on the bank and stood holding the 'dag ont’ for ns to get into," continued the oiii gentleman, “she displayed the most raTishlngly perfect figure I ever beheld. She was dressed in the single cotton garment, fashioned ont of coarse ‘factory,’ which is worn by ths fe males of her clsss in these distant wilds. It had evidently been made a year or two be fore, for she bod outgrown it to such an ex tent that it imperfectly performed the Uu- ties for which it had been constructed. It revealed a bust with which in artistie out lines, the famous Venus di Medica could > not tor a moment compare. The short skirt permitted a glimpae of her ankles that were absolutely fuultless, and—". •I have a hook here, gentlemen, which I should like to show yon, if yon will permit me,” said a dapper little fellow, stepping briskly into tho room. Ho was met with a howl of dlsaent from tho major and tho judge and the capt in and the old squire, so wild and fierce tliat he never stopped running until he woil down the stairs. “Go on, colonel; oh, go on," was the unanimous demand of lilt listeners. The old jndge stepped quietly over, closed the door and locked it, remarking his Amcrjcan heart would be dadbinged if he proposed that story would be interrupted any more if the court knew herself, or words to that effect “I don’t know tliat I have any more to tell,’’ waa the reply. ."Colonel," solemnly said tire venerable major, “if yon leave that peerless girl stand ing there bolding a canoe on the bank of that muddy bayou. 111 lioljl you personally responsible—I will, assure os there is a God in heaven!" “We didn't leave her there," responded the Colonel. "She paddled us across the stream, and when we asked what she charged she said, ‘Ob, nuthin’, I reckon, l’ou went • b'ar huntin' this unwnin', and took all the terbacker with him; ef one o’you fellers’ll give me a chaw I’U call it Minor. ’ We gave her u chew and went on about our business. 1 never saw her again." • ••I believe you’re a liar,” vociferated the Jndge, as he unlocked the door; “on infer nal old bald-headed liar.' «8o do I,” chimed in each of the listeners, ss they passed out and followed the irate leMler down the stain* to the street below. The question of which State produces the most beautiful women is still before the house. ________ PROHIBITION IN ABKAN8A8. The Novel Way of Presenting a Petit to the Court. Little Bock Spec 1st. Morrilton it a flourishing little city fifty-six miles up the Fort Smith railroad. The other day some of the best citiians of the town, men end women, circulated a petition asking the county judge not to imint the saloons then running in the town a license for 1886, and after obtaining the desired number of signatures thereto, marched in a laxly to the court-room, the district court then being in session. Her. 1!. 11. Greathouse, Methodist minis ter. in on appropriate talk presented his honor, Judge Blankenship, the petition. The judge read it, and on informing the m THE FRENCH QUARTER. New York Hail and Express. It is in the restaurants u’nd hotels that the French residents may be studied to tho best advantage, for in these many living in pri vate lodgiuga take their meals. They only "live"—as they will inform you, over the post-prandial cigar—when at din ner, or at tho theater or opera. Like Charles Lamb, their day be gins at 0 o'clock, and dinner is its most important event. Then they throw off the cares of business and life and surrender themselves to the enjoyment of the hour. The French fnmily dinner party ia one of the gayest of gatherings and gives you a good insight into the manners of the middlo class. Jests which seem to be spontaneous, but aro often carefully prepared before hand, are bandied about with a joyousness and abandon that are altogether infectious. If the party is large the din ia sometimes deafening, every one apparently striving to speak at the same time. They are rarely particular in Iheir choice of snbjects. They will talk as volubly oiul with as much' gusto of the weather and similar trite topics os they will of literature, the theater or opera; anil they work themselves into a great state pf enthusiasm and excitement, in which rap idly changing facinl expressions and ani mated gestures play prominent parts. Next to the guests the most striking thing about the hotels is the excellence of the cuisine. The cost of a dinner is usually about thirty centu, tor which yon receive soup, fish, two kinds of meat, vegetables, dessert, cheese and black coffee. Wine, of course, is extra, though at some places, where the tablo d'hote is fifty cents, a pint bottle of red Cali fornia \v ne is included. Much may not bo said in praiso of tlie soup, nnd the fastidious might at first hesitate about tho rest, but the fish and meats and other dishes nre really very good, well cooked, and savory. Nor should * the visitor entertain very high expectations os to the wine, though one might drink much worse things than red California wine at twenty cents the small bottle. On the whole, while the ctiisino of more pretentious restaurants is to be pre ferred, one gets n very good dinner in these places. The writer made one of a party hat explored tho region, and remembers the surprise of all except their guide —an amiable young Frenchman—at the good quality of the fare. One doubting member of the party could not for some time believe Hint the cost was so light, and when finally convinced, hastily concluded that the proprietor must either steal his ■revisions or was. knocking nt the door of Wnkrapfcy. “I know a poor devil;’’ he said, upon determining that the halter mnst be the case, “to whom this place would be a god send; but I couldn't reconcile my consc erice to sending anyone here to hasten this fel low’s ruin.” A BROTHER’S ANIMOSITY. elderly gentleman and the lad, and on the Northwest corner of Ninth and Lombard streeta he accosted a policeman and ordered the arrest of the old gentleman and hia companion. When tho prisoners were marched up in front of Sergeant Boyd, at the Nineteenth District Station-house, he noticed the deli cate appearance of the youth nnd questioned him os to the name. The lad’s lips quivered, but tho articula tion was so low it could not be understood. Tho old gentleman, seeing the embarrassed condition of his friend, who was about to brenk down, turned Sergeant Boyd nnd said; "Sergeant, I will tell you the truth about this matter. This is a young lady who desired to seo the Blums. She was afraid to undertake the journey in female attire, so, after talking the matter over for a time, it was decided that she should wear one of her brother's suits. Will you plense send word to Mayor Smith. He is a per sonal friend of mine and will release me at ouee.”J The man gave his Dnme ns A. J. Lechlar, Kilt) North Eighteenth street, nnd said his companion's name wna Mary Smith, 1920 North Nineteenth street. The prisoners were locked up, notwithstanding Lechlur's appeal, but were afterward released by Lieutenant Skillton for a hearing to-day. SADDBNERS. St. Louis ItepnbUcsn. “What is a saddener?” asked a Republi- ciin reporter of a society friend. “A saddener, dear youth, is n trapping of woe; a painting of your deceased wife’s sis ter; a portrait of the late nnd very much la mented husband; n flower from nn angel mother's grave; little shoes that, having been vacated, have, as requested, been put awuy. A saddener is nn* evcr-prevnlent song, recitation or poem which was a fa vorite with some departed relative. A snd- dener is something to which your attention is invited when yon moke a call as having redolent reminiscences of some one who has censed to exist. If your attention is not invited to it by words, it is by signs nnd cursory glances just nt tho very* time you nre trying to say something nice nnd would rather think of the living. But sadder’n all is nn unpaid promissory note, which, act ing upon nn ancient precept, yon nre keep ing for nine years, hoping to have a use for it." • “Pshaw!" The reporter put tlie same question mildly to a lady friend. “A saddener is nn oft-rend and once prized lovo letter which you hate to burn nnd indignantly refuse to return to tbe writer now that he is married. It is a little o Charges III* Sisters With Arson amt Tes tifies Against Them In Court- Milwaukee, Wix., Special. The jury in the ease of the Traders' In surance Company vs. Miss Mary A. Melindy nnd Snrali E. Westcott, sisters, in the Uni ted States Court this afternoon, returned a verdict for the defendant within ten min utes from the time tho coso was submitted. The trial has been in progress for two weeks, and ban nttracl for three reoaona, viz.; The prominence of the oecnaed, the nature of the charge (arson) and the fact that tho chief witness for the complainant is« brother of tbe defendants. Briefly told, the history of the case is os follows; Seven yean ago, a large building owned by the Danibier A Melindy company nt Ludington, Mich., was destroyed by fire, together with nearly all its contents. At the time Mary Melindy occupied rooms on the second floor of the budding, and was being visited by her married sister, Sa rah E. Wescott. The property was insured for over (29,UUO and tho law claim was paid. A few yean later a brother of Sarah and Mar}', David A. Melindy, was married Z inst the wishes of his sisten nnd since t lima a family feud has existed. Among the companies having a low on the Ludington building was tho Traders'. Tho secretary of this com pany was nppcoocbed by Mrs. David Me lindy and informed that tho Melindy lis ters hod fired the building for tho sidco of the insurance; that they wanted to pay a mortgage held against him on vessel prop erty; that they biul threatened to do so be fore tbe fire and had since confessed tho act to David. The Traders’brought action to recover the amount paid the sisters. In tho trial David testified to the above admissions and also swore that a largo number of voluablo articles belonging to tlie sisters, each as jewelry, sealskins, laces, etc., which were listed as destroyed and npou which the insurance was paid were still in possession of the de fendants. Eminent counsel has been em ployed on both sides, nnd the bitterly com tested case has attracted great attention in this city. The defendants occupy a mag nificent Grand avenno residence—their property-aud ore quite well known through tho North. To-day'a verdict meets with the approval of nearly all who have watched the progress of tho cose. A GIRLS STRANGE FREAK. Slasquenullnff m a Hoy in Order to See tlie Bight* of the Slum*. Philadelphia Tiiue*. "Come along Charlie, we'll go in here nnd take a drink." The speaker was nn elderly man, well dressed and of good presence, and the per son called Charlie was s frail, timid-looking lad, neatly clad in well-fitting garments, with a Derby lint drawn well down over the eyes and a light cane under his right arm. They were standing in front of “Gil" Boll's saloon last night^ra Lombard street, be low Eighth. Therlderly gentleman mount ed the steps, bat the lad lagged behind as if afraid, lie ewt shy glances at the burly negroes and negresaes, who flitted past him through the "ladies' ” entrance to the sa loon. Pshaw! come along, Charlie," said the latter's companion, petulantly. The braced his nerve, and the two entered the aaloon and walked straight to the bar. ■Two beers, plinue,” said the elderly gen tleman. "You'll take a beer, won’t yon, Charlie?" A nod of the head from the lad answered this question. AU the while “Gil” Ball, the colored pro prietor, had been eyeing the lad, and thought he was rather yonthfnl to go float ing around at nightdrinking beer. D — be could not sell to minora. prayer. Permission was obtained from the the court, and it U said the reverend gen tleman fairly shook tbe shingles on the old courthouse with bis thanks to Great Jeho vah and the county judge for the hltsdng that day granted the people of Momlton. The funny part of the above proceedings is, on the petitioners finishing their singing and praying and withdrawing from the room! the court becoming so wrapped up in w hat was transpiring. walked down from the platform and ont of the courthouse, thinking church *»tvieee were over and the M’CULLOUCH’S CAREER. How a llrlplit Irish Ln<l Mmln Himself n DlstlnguUhcri American Actor. Philadelphia Time*. While very many of the foremost actors of the generation now passing sway were born to tho profession and gained their training for tho stage by inherited tradition and their earliest associations, there have been also very many—and they not the least distinguished—who came to tho stage from out of tho crowd in tho gallery and whoso position, was won without other ad vantages thau those derived trom their own inherent talent and their own persevering industry. Forrest was ono of these aud his most successful disciple was another. John McCullough began life in Philadelphia as a poor Irish hid. He was bom in London derry in 1833, nnd was early left on orphan in the care of nn uncle, who rid himself of his responsibility, when John was sixteen, by shipping him to America. He found employment here in wheeling coal nt the Northern Librties Gas Works nnd afterwards wns engnged in a chair fac tory. It won at this time, when only seven teen, that lie married. Ho won a youth of quick intelligence, though without educa tion, and like other bright boys of his time he frequented the theatres. Those were the days of the atock companies, when real dramas were played and when every lad had had his favorite actor, whom he tried to imitated at the “spout shops"—the amateur associations that developed so many profes sionals. McCullough joined one of these and read SUakoapeare at homo and even while at work, nnd such dramatic capacity diddle develop that in 1857 he was allowed to play “Othello,” with the support of hit associate?, nt the Callowhill street Museum. He bad the manly person and the strong, melodious voice of which ho afterwards made such good use, and William T. Fred ericks, then the stage manager of tho Arch Street Theatre, who witnesso.t his per formance nnd who Bnw, too, that the boy knew how to speak clearly and was letter- perfect in his lines, thought that something could be made of him. He offered him ac cordingly a position in the Arch Street company, to play tho smallest part at $1 a week, and McCullough made bis first pro fessional appearance at that theatre aa the servant in “Tho Belle’s Stratagem." With an entrance gained in such n company nn nctors future depended on himself. McCnllongh waa faithful, studious, determined. He gained recogni tion and made friends. Through E. L. Davenport, whom he met at the Arch, he obtained nn engagement the next season at Boston at the Howard Museum. A year later he returned to Philadelphia and won playing in tho company nt the Walnut faded flower, a deserted walking cane or a when he attracted the attention of Edwin few lines, such ns I have hero—’ ‘Thanks; never mind rending them.” “A saddener," said a small boy, “is n maternal test on fhe bronchial tube of your new pouts; it is twelve pages of the Revised Testament to write ont In recess. I guess you can’t fool me on saddeners. Whoop!’’ Said a little girl: “A saddener? Why a saddener is Sunday and no preaching. It’s rent dny and your father full; it is a picnie and a hole in your stocking; it’s—oil, pshnw, go home nnd play with your toes. There’s lot’s of saddeners.” “It’s an empty treasury,” replied n preacher. ‘No copy,” said a printer. ‘Few patients,” answered a doctor. ‘Samchere,” remarked an undertaker. ■Toothache!” responded an old swell. ■Olden a job!" from a striker. ‘Its a saddener when yon have spent yonr Inst dime in having the growler filled and reaching home find the beef stale.” “Having fulsome marriage notices and not n nickel for car faro next dny.” ‘ “No credit and dry." “To have a wife who weighs 100 pounds heavier than yourself.” “To have to stand up simply because you can’t sit down/] A CLOSE CALL. petitioners that their prayer shonlJ be he could--, plied in * low, girlish voice; “I am 21, go ing on 22, sir.” “I don't believe it," said Bell, end turn ing to the elderly gentleman he said: "I’ll not sell yonr kill e beer. You’d better take him borne and put him to bed." The gentleman and his young companion left tbe saloon, while tbe crowd of Africans hanging about guffawed and yaw-yawed. ••Tbere'e something wrong with that couple, aud I’m going to see what it is, ’ „.>id “Gfl" Ball, aabeput on hia coat and L.:t and left his place. Ue followed the si Railroad Velocipede Hare for Life Against a Locomotive. Johnson City (East Tennessee) Comet Sir. Wallace Trnslow, tho yonng depot agent and telegraph operator at Cranberry, hnd n thrilling odvcntnro and a narrow escape from death Inst Friday morningbe- tween Elk Park nnd Cranberry, on the East Tennessee nnd Western North Carolina nils road. Sir. Trnslow spends the night at Elk Park, coming from Cranberry in the evening and returning the next morning, Jon a railroad velocipede. On tbe morning in qncstion, for some reason, he was not ex- peering a train, and, mounting his veloci pede, started to Crauberry. Ho had gone perhaps two hnnilred yards, and hail gotten in the middle of a trestle forty feet high, when suddenly and unexpectedly the down- train thundered around a sharp curve seventy yards in front of him. Ill speed with which tbe train nnd tbe velocipede were approaching each other made it impossible to prevent a collision, nnd to leap to the ground below would probably be ilAtth. Taking in tho situa tion nt a glance and without a moment’s hesitation, he put forth every energy of mind and muscle to speed the velocipede faster toward the oncoming train. By the time the pilot of the engine won within a few feet of him he was nearly across the trestle, and then just as the locomotive and velocipede rushed together he mode a gal lant leap, cleared the track and went down to the ground twenty feet below, saving himself almost miracuronsly. No bones were broken, and with the exception of tho terrible jar ho received, he Is not otherwise injured. FURS AND FINE RAIMENT. IVliat Dome of the Women will Wear Wien tlie Iliads of Horens lllow. Boston Journal. Fashion has prepared for n cold winter with ita rough, thick wooleua and fats, and ita materials ore most suitable and comfort able if worn with discretion. To increase the appearonce of warmth a dash of red is given to many costumes, either in the ca pote or in tbe dress with a red veat or a red K -rnent. Red costa have been a craze at nox ami Newport, and are aeen New York anil Washington, though they have not been accepted yet by the quieter taate of ltoeton. Red coate with heavy trimmings of astrachan and ucarlet turbans to correspond will be worn by ^ ladies later in the season, particu- or winter sports. .Esthetic or doll shades are evidently no longer favored. The furriers have preparations for cold weather, wisely knowing that the feminine delight in rich fun ia a standard and not a transitory taste. Russian sable, the most costly of sll furs, will be by those who can afford their rich elegance. Furriers predict a revival in siislshtn sacques, for the heavy dolmans have been discarded and only tbe short mantles, long and short sacques are in de mand. The deeply dyed sealskins are trimmed with black astrachan. Fur-lined circulars are still to be worn by elderly ladies. Astrachan fur is used for jaunty little jucketa, perfectly close fitting with high collars. Fur trimmings ore made, as usual, of beaver, oral even more popularly of durable, glossy skunk for. Chinchilla remains the lint choice for children’s fur, ami alribya makes a pretty contrast with velvet. For fringes an aa numerous as ever. Forrest. It was one of Forrest’s characteristics that if he took a liking to a person it meant a warm and enthusiastic friendship, of more or less permanence, and one of theso strong likes attached him to McCullough nnd Mc Cullough to him. Ho was engaged to play the juvenile rolca to the famous tragedian, who thus became the patron and ex ample of tho industriom* young nctor. McCullough's professional career practically dates from his association with Forrest which wns equally tho foruintivo influence in hia whole artistic history. Ho played with Forrest in the Eaat till 1800, when he accompanied him to California. At the close of the engagement McCullongh re mained at San Francisco and began there the independent career which developed him into one of the most successful of re cent American stars. lie played an engage ment in support of Edwin Adams and then oined forces with Lawrence Barrett, who ud lately arrived on tho Pacific. They ; ilayed together in the old-fashioned repre- : ;ory through the mining regions and east ward overland, returning Inter to Son Fran cisco, where they opened the California the atre, with the banker Ralston as their backer. Here they produced aeries of Shakespearean and other dramas with a completeness, both in the cast and in the mounting, that had not been equaled in Californio. On Ral ston's death, in 1873, which announced the beginning of a serious financial disturbance, the risks of a costly theatre became too great for the acton to bear alone and Mc Cullough abandoned management and be gan his career as n stan From that timo on his history is snffl ciently familiar. He hail been sixteen years an actor, working and stfadying earn estly. His great natural gifts—a command ing presence, a bandsomo face and a rich and musical voice—had becomo carefully trained, with nn exact if aomowhnt iuelostic method, and tho frequent remiuiacvuces of Forrest which his acting called up were but an additional element of popularity among those who saw with regret the gradual extinction of the old school of his trionics. Deservedly, therefore, McCul lough won his place in public recognition anil became one of tho most popular of all the serious actor* of hia time, aud for quite ten yean there was no more prominent fig ure upon the American stage. With the ex ception of “Jock Code,” in Wingfield's play of "The Bondman,” he produced no origi nal part, confining himself to the old legit imate repertory and notably to thoso pseudo-classic play's of tha school of Sheri dan Knowles, in which Forrest had been so illustrious. It may be said, also, that he developed no original aspects in his art, except so far aa a stroiqi and intelligent personality gave an individual charm work that wns in itself more less conventional The dignity and beauty of his “Virmnius,” for exam ple, will be always remembered. Its beauty was essentially statuesque, but beautiful it waa and fullYif a stately sort of poetry that was qnite his own. His method was less adopted to the warm passion aud rapid movement of Hhakespero and tbe romantic drama and in modern parts be was never successful; but within hia own well chosen line bis work waa admirable and it waa of a kind that is now almost unrepresented on the stage. With the exception of a visit to England in 1882, where ho played at Drury Lane and waa kindly receivM, McCullotigh’s profes sional career waa comparatively uneventful and quite evenly successful down to the season before the last. At this time it be gun to be whispered that he waa losing something of his vigor and the fear* of bts friends were confirmed at the beginning of last season, when be finally broke down at Chicago, and it waa recognized that hie ill- nesa waa incurable The hut year he has been simply one of waiting for the inevita ble end. On Dress Parade. Sharp shifting lines of loyal light; Tliu bayonets flash firm flies along. O'er hearts whose patriot fires born bright, That muster near a thousand strong. With baud* untrained to martial deeds But quick to lean tbe aoldier’s trade. Her champions when their country needs. Stanch freemen stand at Drew* Parade. A shortened service, shrunken line. On soil fraternal blood has drenched, Flushed with the victor's gory wine, With patriot ardor still unquenched; Another dawn brings battle-storm! Well knows each heart, all undismayed. Thereafter many a manly form shall stand at Dr< No rnoro shall stand at Dress Parade. The final happy victory won, Fresh garlanded with loyal thanks Stand a bronzed handful in the sun. Remnant of thrice replenished rank*. For songs of peace and home they change Familiar martial music, played Where death well knew the gamut’s range— And hut, glad peace-crowned Dress Parade. A last—till (panted their release From life a hard marches, sharp alarms, Aud won those fields where perfect peace Folds tbe war-weary In her arm*. Comrades! when 'neath the soothing sod, Or soon or late, we are all laid. On shining sands, triumphant trod. We'll have a glorious Dress Parade! —John 8. AtebeMou, in San Francisco News-Letter. ITEMS BRIEF BUT INTERESTING. Oh. what has become of the Mugwump bird In this weather of wind and snow. And does he roost as high as we beard He roosted a year ago? A vesrajo and his plumes were red As the ueepest of cardiual huer. But in th j year they 've changed, 'tis said. To the bluest of bilious blues. A year ago and this beautiful thing warbled In careless glee. It's oh, we stab, for the times gono by When the Mugwump lived to laugh— When, coy and shy, he roosted high. And couldn’t be caught with chaff. And it's oh, we say, for the good old day Which uever again may come— When the Mugwump threaded his devions way, And whistled lumty-tum. CrmiZAXioN marches with the quickstep. A Sioux chief rides a bicycle. Lnxa honeymoon trips gladdon the hearts of British brides this autnmn. Farmer Dalrtmple, of Dakota, has har vested 210,000 bushels of wheat this year. A parrot that sings "My Love is Like a Red, lied Rose" is a California curiosity. A $50,000 emancipation monument is to rise nt Vicksburg by the dimes and dollars of ex-slaves. The fnney of G. A. Sheldon, of Randolph, N. Y., is for old carnages, in which he has invested $20,000. A floral fnnch in high favor is a bank of chrysanthemums, fringed with low border of frngrnnt pinks. Some coins sent all the way from Japan were chinked into the Longfellow memorial box the other day. Quite a common complaint in England is “tennis elbow,” a soreness that it some times takes a year or two to cure. A full-length “state" portrait of Qneen Victoria is abont to be pointed at Windsor bv Professor Angoll, the coart painter at Vienna. A sum of $500,000 is to be token yenrly from tbe King of Bavaria'a civil list for tbe payment of that princely spendthrift's pri vate debts. Flaoeolet, now the most famous sire in Europe, has been eold by M. Lefevre for $20,000, and the hone goes to the imperial stud at Graditz. ConxTiLLE, Cal., isatownof forty houses and bat one inhabitant, who saw the min ing camp at ita rise, ita glory and ita fall. His only neiglibon are jnst over tho hill- in tbe cemetery. The rear car of a circus train that left Brandon, Miss., a few nights ago had upon it a $3,000 gnu. 8ome negroes, who had fallen in love with the ennotu beast, un coupled tbe car, and, running tbe gnu off into a swamp, stole it. A medical journal notes that whllo one eminent writer boa asserted that those who •moke tobacco grow brainless aa lizards, two German savants have arrived at tbe conclusion that smoking is nothing at all except watching the amoke. Tup. town of Posen, in Germany, iadonbt- less the only one in the world which bos a college graduate as its baker. He advertises in the local newspaper his “Carlsbad bak ery," and signs bis advertisement "A. von Uraheki, Dr. Phil., master baker.” It la doubtful, says a Nevada paper, if a legislative body in any country ever paseeil a law that was so completely anil universal ly ignored aa the anti-treating act of the last Legislature of Nevada. Everybody claims the right to treat a friend, auu the claim ia so reasonable that even the officers do not dispate it. A quart of milk was recently taken from .several ftno bred cows on exhibition at Portland, Or., to test the richness of each. The milk was placed in glosa jars and allowed to rise. That from one of the cows ehowed more than three-eights pare cream. The jar was filled to a depth of nine inches- ot which four were solid cream. Fire sprang up in a London bird home a few days ago and there was much flatter within and stir without. “Don’t let the birds burn to death,’ laid a stranger, “smash the roof.” “But they'll tty away," •aid the keeper, who hardly knew his heels from his head, so beside himself waa he. The glass roof was smashed, however, and ont new many of the birds; hnt they could not fly far, being singed; and were caught in tho trees. Shiny of the objects in the aviary were lost, and tbe death list in on ad joining monkey borne was heavy. A writer on palmistry says the hands of different nationalities differ. The German hand ia thick, abort-fingered, short-nailed, a wide palm. The Spanish hand is noted the world over for its tapering fingers and rare flexibility. The French and Italian hand is long and capable of close pressure, but the English hand is tho best knit, firmly-set hand, blended with all the varia tion of typical beaniy known. The rich, accomplished and beautiful daughter of a German savant recently de- ceamd, has deserted her mother in order to marry a coarse, brutal and ignorant fisher man. He made her give him all her fortune before marrying her, and she now does menial work like other peasant women. The husband is a firm believer in the right of a man to beat liis wife. Moat people will think this yonng woman was crazy, bnt a medical commission declared her perfectly mood versos tiolil. Mr. Johnsing (to Mias Tompkins, whose family archives* how her grandmother to have been a muse to George Washington) —May I hub do pleasure of prein traducin' to yo Miss Tompkins, a gemmen frenob mine? Miss Tompkins (rather superciliously)— Who am da gemmen fr n, ob mine? Mr. Johnsing (depr. i itm.ly)—He am ob no pa’tickler fninly Mias Tompkins, bnt be am pa’t proprietor ob a faah’nable up-town hot. 1 touv.rial pu’lnr. Mias Tompkins (gnefaraaly)- I will gran- Ufy myae’f de pleasure ob teethin' yo’ f ten’, Mutoli John-ing. > J The dentists' bills nt Vaasar Collegi ere said to be something frightful, 1 Lis corns- from compelling every girl to e.it a pm.-; of her first cake.—xonkerr tituteeiusu. tectnre. Tho main building will bo siiraonnded by a fence made of shrubs covered with ice, a beautiful ef fect being secured by spraving the shrubs nnd allowing the spray to freeze. Between this ice feneo and tho walls of the palaoo will be constructed a race course. .Tho in terior of the palace will be lighted by dee- tricity. Electric lights will also illuininnto the race course nnd tho entrance to tbo palace. The interior arrangements will bo similar to thoso of fhe Montreal palace. The ice blocks to bo used in its construc tion will bo sixteen inches thick and fonr feet square. WHEN FAIR .MAIDS WED. A Silken String of Hits for tllT Ilrlites that Are to He. A diamond “lucky" slipper is a novelty for brides. A Washington bridegroom recently gavo the minister n $1000 note. A pale pink gown wreathed with chrys anthemums wns tho dress worn by a bride- elect at a party in Paris the other night. At a recent wedding in Washington, D. C., tho bridesmaids (eight in number) wore presented with veils of Flanders lace, which had been specially ordered from abroad for the occasion. Mr. and Mrs. Alfred Taylor, of Westport, Conn., aged respectfully 94 nnd 92 years, expect to celebrate their seventy-fourth wedding anniversary in Thanksgiving week. A recent issue of the Louisville Courier- Journal contained on one page reports of sixteen weddings, nnd another announced the granting of seven divorces by tho Chan cery Conrt, of that city, thns giving matri mony a majority of nine. At a recent wedding tho organist created some amusement by interpolating “Prithee, little maiden, will you marry me?” fronx “Patience," in his musi.' at a critical point in the ceremony. At a recent fnshionnliln wedding the one bridesmaid wore bright buttercup yellow, a real Directoire dress, white lace skirt, yel low bodice, bat trimmed with yellow—a genuinely picturesque costume. 1 Tbe silk stockings were of yellow, the hnt of Leg horn, very large, turned np at one side, yellow plume, nnd long streamers of yellow- velvet nbbon. Yellow is now esteemed a favorite color, and n fortunate one; it is no longer deemed the synonym for envy. M. Pcnali, a portrait painter in Lyons, was engaged to be married to Mile. Minnio Bernard, and the dny of tlie wedding hod been annonneed. A short time ago Pennli said to his fiancee, “I hope yon have paid defcrcnco to my antipathy and ordered all yonr clothes without a bustle." Tbe girl smiled and replied ; "Sooner than wear a wedding dress withont a Immure I shall never wear any at all.” The artist earnestly protested, and finally begged her to cheese between him and her devotion to fashion. The result was not in hia favor, and he left the same evening for Egypt. Concerning wedding etiqnette, the fash ion of bridesmaids has gono ont tempora rily, and one person, generally a niter, alone accompanies the bride to the altar oh her aid. The bride, attended by her father or some near friend, comes in lust, after the ushers. After the mother, sister and family have preceded her, these near rela tives group themselves about tlie altar steps. The groom takes his bride from tho hand of her father or nearest friend, wjio then retires and stands a little behind the bridal pair. Ho must be near enough to re spond quickly when lie hears the words, '■Who giveth this woman to be married to this man?” It is no longer the fashion to display tbe presents at the wedding. They are arrnngrit in an upper room, and ahowu to a few friends of the bride the day before the cert mony. Nor ia it tho fashion for tho bride to wear any jewels. These ore re served for har flnt appearance as a married woman. NEWSPAPER FUNNY MEN. Ur. K. J. Mi-Cablet, postmaster at Wal nut Grove, S. C., is said to have the longest beard in the United State*. Ue wear* it plaited and keeps it under his clothing. Tbe plait runs down to his waist ami then around his waist twice. When combed ont it reached down to his feet Air. McCarley is five feet ten inebe* high, is ah yean of age, and of light complexion beard ia alitUe mixed with gray, lie owns a good farm and is well to do. ’ Mr. McCar- ley says that hi-le ant continues to grow, and when it gets long enough to lie • n tie floor, and ha can VMk mufl UklMM*$MB to -.-it i..:.. If on . xbiliitiou. Sr. !v Minn., will have an ire palaeo tlii. -niter, l’lfty men have mil.„en!»d . . : touurd il- romuruotiou. The I e e . - ' !.■ 15l| h ( l 125 feet, with llOO eT- i oi:i -. .. r- of the .Suru.ui btvlr of President Eeelve, of Amherst College, wna in Congress, and recalls with pride that hi* election coat him only five cents. Treated tooneboer, we suppose.— Alto California. Ah, ah. Another faater 1 A man in Ohio has (rone twenty-eight dsya withont eating anything. Tho name of the paper he i> editing U not stated.—Brooklyn Eagle. A German statistician has discovered that there are 1,000,000 blind persons in the world, not counting, of conne, those in love.—New Y’ork Commercial Advertiser. The man whose name gets into the paper withont his consent should go and comfort tho man whose name is left ont when he wanted it in.—New Orleans Pica yune. The statesman who so far forgets himself as to ran after a street car suffers a fall in public estimation which twenty-five years of penance will not repair.—Detroit Free Press. An Ohio man has invented a practical thinking machine. It will be the greatest boon for dudes since the invention of tho aword-pointed shoes.—Burlington Freo Press. “With money come poor relations," says on exchange.” Bnt poor relations never come with money. This is one of the rules that won't work both way*.—Norristown Herald. When Lome told his mother-in-law that he bad been rotten-egged, she- put her handkerchief to her face, bnt whether to dry her eyes, to stifle her laughter or sim ply to hold her nose, will never be known. —Boston Post. A new variety of bee has been discovered in California, twice aa large aa any other on record, with a sting in proportion. It is ■aid that even the Chinese will go when ono of these bees backs np against them and begins to posh.—Detroit Free Press. The pyrophono is a new musical instru ment, constructed to make music from gas. Tbe inventor evidently got his idea from tbo consumer who was presented with an exag gerated gas bilb The consumer made the ■•music, long metre.—Norristown Herald. In amt Uut of Clrareh. The men who seek to drag polities into the churches and sectarianism into politicn should be sternly rebuked by every good citizen.—New York Graphic. ■ ‘What do they do when they install a minister?” inquired a small boy; “do they B nt him in a stall and feed him?” “Not a it,” said hia father; “they harness him to the church and expect hiiu to draw it alone." Husband—I noticed to-day that the Smiths hare bad their pew at church up holstered in bine velvet plush. Wifs (envi ously)—I know it. And just think how shabby and cheap par pew looks. It is positively wicked. A thief entered the Congregational ^ Church vestry room at Maquoketa, Iowa, 15 through tha window and stole the savings is bun- containing the contributions of the us , infant class of the Sunday— hod, nmonnt- ir- ing to about $7.-Chicago Times. *• A well known Tela. . . verted anil bee-sine a n.ii .lay, just b, orb p roach th.- ..j. -■ l> ■ i Vie* I thought, when -1 l>y tin- oiyani.-t, v 1 nin- hvnin. n.ii.1: ••Wbat'kiii ■- •4 th Wu* h.tli'l Imv, min r wascon- <)n*‘ Sna- iit, lie- U'slH e np- fcrrinn to t bhitll I