The weekly telegraph. (Macon, Ga.) 1885-1899, March 16, 1886, Image 2

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THE MACON WEEKLY TELEGRAPH: TUESDAY. MARCH 16, 1886.--TWELVE PAGES. IS TJ THE TELE GRAPH, fUBLIPIlKD I T CRT DAT IN THE TEAS AND WEEKLY BT THE Telegraph and Mes?cn"cr Publishing Co., 97 Mulberry Streot, Macon, Oa. The Daily la delivered by carriers In the city or bailed pOBtage free to subscribers, fur (1 per month, $2.60 for three months, $5 for six months, or $10 a year. Tax Wxxxlt is mailed to enbecrlbcrs, postage tree, at $1.25 a year and 75 cents for six months. Transient advertisements will lie taken for the Daily at $1 per square of 10 lines or less for the first insertion, snd 50 cents for each subsequent in sertion, and for the Weekly at $1 for each insertion, notices of deaths, funerals, marriages and births, Rejected communications will notbe returned, Correspondence containing important news and discussions of living topics lx solicited, butmustbe brief and written upou but one side of the paper to have attention. Remittances should be made by express, postal Dote, money order or registered lettor. Atlanta Bureau 17 j. Peachtree street. All communications should be addressed to THE TELEGRAPH, Macon, Oa. Money orders, checks, etc s'lould be male paya ble to H. C. Hanson, Manager. Tills cliickeu when ilrcseeil is foully un. dressed. There Are many, many chickens in society. '•The PreBi- Tiie Boston Beoord says: dent's hungry fellow-Democrats look to him to repeat the miracle of the loaves and fishes.” Not Rt all. But his (ellow-Demo crats cannot understand why he should play penockle with the Sadducees and Pharisees night and day whiio there are ao many devils to be east out of the body oolitic. It seems that Miss Betsy Cleveland sc :ured the register's office in Washington city for the negro Matthews. Miss Betsy has, os the power behind the throne, achieved for herself what the woman' rights crowd has vainly sought, bnt it at, guos badly for the popularity of the move ment that tho first woman in power ecle brates her succeed by appointing a negro to office. Gen. Terry, who has been promoted to the vacancy made by the death of Gen, Hancock, is a llepublican candidate for the Presidency. Gen. Terry is a very able man. llo thinks that the llepublican party will want to bavo a soldier candidate tho next time and he hopes to bo tho one to be selected. The lost time he was in Wash ington was during the Swnimconrt-mnrtinl. Ho is n very plain, unassuming-looking man, with abroad forehead, straight nose, underneath whi ib hangs a flowing mous tache and long, 'frown chin-whislters. He is 4 good speaker, a man ot original ideas, ai d has a good military record, Since he has succeeded to the position ot Gen. Han cock he more than ever believes he will be nominated by the convention. The Washington correspondent of the Herald says: "Timothy J. Campbell lias had a few words with the President Tie journeyed to the White Houso this nftcr- noon to request the appointment of a clerk of internal revonue in Friedsam's district, Brooklyn. Mr. Cleveland heard his per- suusivo eloquence for soma time. Then he said: The incumbent will not resign and I can't remove him, hecauso hois indorsed by several hundred of the alleged best men of this city.' ‘Share, that’s nothin','was the prompt rejoinder. 'I can git the signachers uv eighty thousands of tho alleged ketther iliment uv the party axin’ ye to resign on account uv ineompeteney,' and clapping his toll tile far down on his head the mem ber (or tho Eighth district mado a straight line for tho stairs." Confederate History. Every now and then a Washington cor espondent gives a bit of so-callod Confed- rate history. This is the lite<t contribu- ,’.on, and from the New York World's man: 'A member of the Ci nteilerntc Congress said tho other day that there was a chapter in the history of the rebellion that had never yet been written. He was hoping that some of the members of the Confed crate Congress would take up the topic and put it in the form of a book. He referred to the story of the secrect sessions of the Confederate Congress, no record of which has ever been publisced. In speaking of the things which had never come to light he described an offer made by France to the Confederate Government. France of fered to recognize the Confederacy upon one condition, and that was that they would give up slavery. England offered to recog nize the Confederacy if they would ngree to let her have cotton at 121 cents a pound.' The Confederate leaders were very un wise, to Bay the least, not to have traded cotton to England foi liberty at twelve and one-lialf cents per pound. But the Confederacy started out with no money, no cotton and very little of anything else, ex- ept enthusiasm. As to slavery, it was very well understood that its extinguishment would have excited the sympathy of foreign nations, bat the Southern people at large were willing to sacrifice everything but slavery. It will be a task of some difficulty to write the civil history of the Confederacy. The closing days of tho war were very de structive to data of all kinds. Bnt why does not tho Confederate Congressman, who talked with tho World’s correspondent, un dertake it? Let him tell us all about the of fers of France and England, as to slavery and cotton. In the meantime the government might save a part of the history of the country. The reports of battles are being published, bnt the Confederate government had a civil organization. It is claimed that the records of the Confederate Congress are in the possession of the Federal government. If this bo true they should bo published. The people who are to come after ns should huvo the benefit of the whole truth. That some valuable records are in tho hands of the government, is illus trated by tho fact that a clerk in Washing ton bos published a volume of tho laws passed by the Confederate Congress. Sena tor Vest, Mr. lteagnn, Mr. Singleton and Mr. Barksdale were Confederate Congres; men. They might take some action in this matter. Senator Kristie anil the President. When, almost a year since, Senator Eus- tis had tho courage to openly protost agaiust A Washington special to tho Herald says "It ia probable that when the history of Congress comes to bo written Mr. Dingely, of Maine, will be accorded the Bnnkum medal for the most stupendous and trans parent mock scheme yet sprung upon an unsuspecting world, llis bill (H. It. Bunk um, U'Jfi) proposes that "whoever, as labor er, workman or mechanic, has been cm ployed by or on behalf of the government of the United States since June 25, ISOS, the date of the act constituting eight hours day's work, shall be paid for each eight boars he has keen employed as for a full day's work at the price per day as regulated by private parties in the vicinity in which tho work was performed without reference to the number of honrs' work required by snch parties.” In other words bo proposes by his retroactive law to odd twenty per cent to all wages paid to government work men during the past seventeen years in tho navy yards and shops under national con trol. This tricky bill appeals directly to the laboring classes of San Francisco, Brooklyn, Norfolk, 1‘ensacola, Philadelphia, Kittery, Springfield, Boston, Rock Island, Washing ton and other places. It likewise delights the claim lawyers throughout the land and partakes much uf a lawyer bunkum for that reason. All the employes under the engineers engaged on the river and harbor improvements will, if properly instructed, shout for, the author of this back pay scheme. They forget what remorse back jsiy jobbery cost many Congscssmen. The men who have performed piece work will nr.tnrally favor sack an act Their claims will complicate matters dreadfully, but that will fuithe: interest the lawyers and enable them to exact more than the regulation twenty-five per cent for services os collec tors. Secretary Manning, when asked abont the matter, estimated roughly, from such information as was readily accessible at the navy department, that fully (3,0(10, 000 would be necessary to pay these claims, bnt the probabilities are that double that sum would be inadequate. In nearly every the workman performed his labor r a written or verbal contract to serve i hours. The abrogation of all neb r con tracts by a sweeping law of this sort demoralizing in every view that can be taken of ib If passed inch a law would encour age every workmen to break faith with hi* employer, and the gravity of such conduct is not altered because the employer is the Htti’Ml '* ■flHfiii tho methods then pursued by Mr. Cleve land, he was overwhelmed with a storm of reproach from tho Mugwump organs, aided and assisted by many Domoeratio journals, whose special friends hail not then been provided for. Senator F.nstia hos lived to see and enjoy a speedy vindication. Mr. Cleveland is in trouble. Tho task he boa undertaken, has proven too difllcnlt for one, with limited experience of public wen and measaros, nnd he is reaching out for sympathy and support. The truth of the late interview between Senator Enstis and himself baa been made publio. Mr. Clove land asked of a newspaper man: Why docs not Senator Eustls come to see me? I have not the slightest ill will sgainBt him, nor can I suppose that he haa any against me. My duties here take mo out of self. They leave me no time, even had I the inclination, to harbor personal resentments. I am trying to give the peo ple a clean and honest anil able govern rnent, and to this end I wont tho co-opera tion of clean and ablo and honest Demo crats. You may tell Senator Enstis I shall be glad to see and confer with him and hear his views." When Senator Enstis was informed.of this he promptly declared his desire to call upou tho l’resident; and, on Friday evening, ac companied liy the correspondent, he went to the White Uonse, where he was cordially received by the President, The conversation between them lasted about an honr, and was perfectly frank and earnest on both sides. Senator Eustls guvo his views as to the situation with reference to tho Senate, and explained at length bis idea of its real purport. He told the Pros! dent that, in his opinion, the Republican Senators were using tho controversy to rivet the attention of the people, so as to secure thp fullest possible audience for cer tain disclosures they hoped to bring about rcfiectiug upon tho character cf some of his nominees, and that they were concerned very little, if at all, about the papers they had asked him to produce. He said it would be fatally unfortunate if the Repub licans should he able to establish serious charges against any considerable number of the President's appointees. The President qnietly said: “If it be true that any of my appointments are un worthy, I hope they will bo rejected. It is the Senate's function to do this. The Sen ators are my coadjutors and advisors; they cannot be too exacting for my taste. I want no improper men in office.” Very true,” responded Eustls. "If the matter ended with the rejection of the bad men and the substitution of good ones, there would be satisfaction all around. No body imagines that you desire any other consummation, but, Mr. President, do you not see the political aspect of this matter and its bearing upon the administration and the party ? The lesson the Republican Senators will seek to teach is not tbst of your acquiescence in the rejection of u had man, bnt that ot your having appointed these bad men in the first plsce. They will make the point that your administrition has been unequal to ita responsibilities; that it is under reckless or vicious influ- ences, snd in support of this will bring forward the list of defeated nominees, with the charges made snd sustained against the country to remember that but for the Republican Senate's intervention these men would have boon bolding office under a Democratic administration.” The President nodded, bnt said nothing. "It is not a question,” continued Mr. Eustis, "of whether you knowingly ap pointed had men, or will approve or disap prove of their rejection. No intelligent ob server of political events believes, or can be made to believe, the slightest charge agaiust the perfect integrity of your motives. The question is whether the Democratic party can afford to go before the people ia the ap proaching Congressional election with the record of having produced so much rejected material." “Ido not see how that is to be prevented now.” "The record can be forestalled. The names of appointee* as to whose fitness there is any doubt can be withdrawn. Every man whose.presence in the govern ment is a source of criticism and suspicion can be eliminated.” “Would you do that?" "I would, from tho highest to the lowest, I would lop off every branch threatening the health and vitality of the Democrats." At the close of the conversation the Presi dent shook hands warmly with Sanator Eustis and thanked him for tho candor with which he had spoken They parted good friends, each evidently convinced of the other's purity of motive. This is manly, truthful, courageous nnd creditable to both parties. Much harm has been done the publio service, and the Democratic party by way of appointments, already made and confirmed. The Repub licans of tho Senate have only been too happy nnd prompt to confirm the bad ap pointments of the President. If all the appointments in place of sus- suspended Republicans are rejected, farther injury will bo done to the public service and the Democratic party. This can he avoided, if Mr. Cleveland will carry out his pledge with the same bravery that it has been given. He has been "de ceived nnd imposed” upon, by the very lowest specimens of spoilsmen, nnd the fact can be no more strongly illustrated than in the success which has attended the junior Senator from Georgia in providing for his kin and henchmen. It is fair concede, that what is true cf Georgia may he applied with equal force to other States. Tho Senate holds in its committees the names of men as appointees to “public trusts" whose characters and careers are standing insult to “honest civil service re form," such as tho Democratic platform de manded. They arc known quite os well to Republi can os to Democratic Senators. Their re- juctjfui wilt plnco the administration in un unpleasant attitude before lAc couu 6y. Their confirmation means disgrace and con fusion to the Democratic party. The mistakes of the past cannot bo cared. The future always bolds out the chance for amendment. If Mr. Cleveland will lop off these miserable fungi from tho party for whoso “health and vitality” he claims to be concerned, the way will bo open to him to reunite the acattered and discordant ele ments which stood solidly at his back a year ago. The situation demands acts— prompt ones - and not word*. vote in favor of the abolition of capital punishment." Two men who had committed a foul murder were enabled to enlist thirty thou sand signatures in their behalf. The mem bers of the Legislature even attempted to bribe a Governor from the discharge of his duty. Hero were a lot of people petition ing for a wrong against law, society and justice. Fortunately in this instance the petition proved worthless. The right of petition cannot be taken from the people, even if they misunder stand and abuse it, but Rome safeguards should be thrown around i£ Judicial, administrative, executive and legislative officials should be barred from this method of securing the tenure of their positions, and inflicting wrongs upon the community. In addition to this, all petitions for office and the pardon of criminals should bo fully set forth in tho public gazettes, before signatures are sought. These precautions might disarm a practice which has become d.mgerous and demoralizing to every de partment of the public service, and to the peace and good order of society. bade him farewell. Despair for the first time broke her resolution. It left her a poor, weak wreek of a woman, with five helpless children dependent upon her. If the condemned murderer possessed the instincts of a true man, and there are proofs that he did—that ho had been a loving hus band and father—the picture of that ruined homo and those clouded lives must have been more terrible in his last hours than the shadow of the gallows itself. The scenes are not uncommon. Every day the courts Chat grind out justice crush with tho husks of society, hearts of gold. Crime is a two-edged sword, and murder is four sided. Is it not strange that passion is so strong, humanity so weak, and judgment so easily unbalanced that men go forward to acts that will blast the future and the present aliko for all those whom they hold dear in life? “Tho son of a convicted felon"; theHe words will ring in the ears of those Louisiana boys as long as life shall last. “The daughter of a man who was hung;" this is to bo the dowry of the little girls. “A murderer's widow!" This for be the party’s candidate for Govci Major Bacon is a candidate before the T)7 ocratic electors of the entire State, J would not, if he could, limit the a single county or group of counties. ‘‘(.IltfstjJ Slireds and Patch**. Borrowed money is of all things theuj scriiiitilons about keeping Lent.—L 0 ,.l Citizen. “ The silver-plated statesmen have a i plo creed—long speeches and short doll^l —Fhiladelphia Press. " It is notod that "Gathering Beans" Millet, of tho Morgan collection, bought by a Boston man.— Philudelpt^I Record. Nature accommodates herself to fins cnmstunces of tho people. Yon never hsu|l of a wntei-spout in Kentucky.—Pittsbml Chronicle. 1 Wa durin busiu unite dent, naval natio "V Sb tflkei be s' 1 will III T1 If the agricultural bureau can find i t,jl tn raise cold tea on the Smithsonian c the mother, who is carrying a cross as Congress will be liberal in the matte; J appropriations. —Philadelphia Times. Explanations from the yonth who i forcibly ejected from a WeHt Side reside# The night of Petition. To lie people belon >s the sncrel right of petition. It is the vohicle through which they may make known tlieir wrongs and burdens to their rulers, nnd oak forjredrcss, But this right haa been fearfully abused by politicians uud office seekers. Tho present administration, bowailx the fact that it hna hearkened to petitions, nnd the public service has been scandalized, that notoriously incompetent, nnd in some cases bad men have been clothed with ‘public trusts.' Not one man in n thousand has the moral conrage to refuse to sign a petition of any kind when asked. Very few mon inform themselves oa to the object of petitions when their signatures are sought. They sign to get rid of an unpleasant appeal, with the mental reservation and hope, that it will he counted as nothing. Examples after examples have been given of the worthlessness of the ordinary petition, and yet men will continue to sign them, and the couutry is burdened with bxd officials, and justice ia often cheated of its victims Bnt n few days since, a distinguished Georgian, who admitted that he could not refuse to sign petitions, related to the writer, the history ot one, recently pi Rented to a municipal corporation in Geor gia. A wag wroto a petition, asking that n paved street be opened to a disreputable resort. He first obtained the signature of his father, n clergyman. Armed with this, the grand jury were easy victims, when the names of many prominent citizens followed on the list. Not one had read the com tents cf the paper. A very strong illustration is afforded in the case of the murderers recently hung in New (Jrhulls "Petitions asking for a commutation of the death j>enaltv to imprisonment tor life were circulated, which, in a very few wet-ha received the signatures of 30,000 persons, including the Governor of Mississippi, mem bers of the Supreme Court of Mississippi and California, the mayor of San Francisco, United States judge and other influential citizens. The Board of Pardons met again in February, and all these petitions were presented and speeches made. One of the members of tho board changed his vote in deference to this expression of public opin ion, the other two—the majority—stood fine, and the pardon was refused. "The last appeal made in behalf of the condemned men was a request signed by forty-two members of the Ktate Legislature asking tlw Governor to postpone the hang The Last Point uf Resistance Tossed. A friend at our elbow, who is gloomy as to the future of the Democratic party and the South, suggests that Southern repre sentatives should make no further struggle to hold tho government to its written char ter, hut should go in for a fair divide of the spoils. He contends that the South can never catch up with tho North in the march of progress, when hundreds of millions are annually expended in the latter section, o which the South is compelled to pay her proportion. He is dumbfounded that Democratic President is controlled by Mug wumps, and thnt there seems to be no hope of better government for the South. He contends that we bad best take all the Blair bill can give, all that the rivers nnd harbors legislation can draw out of the Treasury, and thnt Southern representatives join al the jobs on hand and all that may bo pro posed. He argues thnt the country will be bound to go to pieces under a continuance of unwise legislation, nnd that the Sonth should sco to her fair share of the assets. There is mnch meat in his ideas. Per haps tho end he desires is approaching more rapidly than he ia prepared to admit. Every Southern representative hut one voted for the late pension bill, after having made speeches against it, in order that a few Northern Democrats may but carry their districts. It is claimed that juggling will have to ho resorted to to prevent tho pas- sago of tho Blair hill by a stiff majority. Even Riddleberger has had to make the motion to expel tho lobbyists from ll/o floor \of tho Sennit-, including thoso holding cards of admission from the Southern Senators. The long straggle of reconstruction, nnd tho demoralization which followed in South ern States governments, have dulled the sense of honor of tho people and it is re flected in their representatives. The Sonth does not exhibit staying powers of resist ance, and her return to the government has not Ire-established methods of honesty snch ns were predicted by Sumner and others. The spirit of the people has been broken, and it has communicated the misfortune to nil animate things in this section. Even the Georgia mule has succumbed. Pa tiently he has toiled In the cotton-field, and carried accumulating mortgages on his back, for theso many years, but during all this time it wna dangerous to fool with him iu his hours of cose and leisnre. Orators have embalmed the forceful and expansive reach of his hind feet, and poets have sung of tho strength of bis back hone, his lightning agility and calm exterior when contemplating an extraordinary coup. All men have admired the heroic straggle he haa made against the encroachments of tho “intelligent contraband" between whom and be lias raged “an irrepressible conflict. Alas, the stern power of the male has succumbed. He has forgotten his cunning agility, and has ceased to remember his years of wrong and oppression. A toddling child might hang toy bells on his heels now, or fondle with his once unapproachable and untouchable ears, the blazon of his blood and heredity. Bnt a tew days since we noticed a lmck darkey, appareled with a pair of keen spars, mount a four-year-old mule. Immediately we trailed to enjoy the free circus. Though poorly provided in the way of saddle and bridle, the darkey rammed the cutting blades into the flanks of the mole. True Co his instincts, there wa* a visible eleva tion of spine and a couple of eccentric dashes to the right and left. Another gig from the glittering rowells, and he lowered bis crest, laid hack his ears and loped away like a buck-rabbit in front of a hound. His spirit hod been broken, ho hail surrendered to the inevitable, and the "intelligent contraband” was master of the situation and victor over his life-long en emy. In the halcyon days anent the late civil strife, such a performance would have cost some white man fifteen hundred dollars. The last point of resistance has been reached and passed. The Georgia mule has been reconstructed, and by a coon. The way is clear anil open to the Northern invader to come and share -he Unit. The day may not be distant when the gloomy friend, at our elbow, shall Vee the many htujl statesmen of the South totting off spoils from the public treasury. heavy as that under which Christ fainted on the road Calvary; who has six mouths to feed, and no friend on earth. Can any man who has such at Btake yi-ld to passion or temptation with this picture before him? A fiend might, but a man, never! Men and women who yield to crime for get these things. And the strangest part of it is that many who often have the pictures of human misery thrust before their eyes, and who note the far reaching and blasting effect of error ore not impressed. The man Ford and his accomplices were- officers of the law, and in the jails and courts had seen despairing women and broken-hearted children go forth to lives of misery. Yet with cold-blooded determination they went upon the streets, assassinated a citizen. They staked their own lives and the happiness of their families upon a mere political game with the coolness of a gambler who tosses a coin before a faro dealer. Sorely for the sake of onr common humanity, we must believe that the possible consequences never rose to mind. H that final jail scene had been flashed before tho eyes of Ford as hare possibility of the result of his intended crime, he most have fled from the scene even when the pistol of his desperate vic tim was in his face and hia own life in danger. The Washington Star makes this centre shot at Cleveland's coon: "Petitions are pouring in from New York State in favor of the confirmation of tho nomination ot Mr. C. Matthews to a district ofllco. Now let the President nominate a citizen of the district for a Now York office, and see which way the petition stream runs." Mu. Cleveijanu has the longest score on language, as may he seen from this sum mery: “‘Usufract.’ — 8. J. Tilden. 'Bright Snnlight of Publicity.'—Manton Marble. ‘Turn the Unseals Out.'—The Sun. ‘ltobcson ism.'—Tho Han. 'Star eyed Goddess of Reform.'—Henry Wntter- son. ‘Structural Weakness.’—William C. Whitney. ‘Offensive Partisanship.'—Gro ver Cleveland. 'Publio Office ia a Public Trust.’—Grovor Cleveland. ‘Innocuons Desuetude.'—Grover .Cleveland.” log for a month until the Legislature met, tbdr competency ami fitness, and then aek I and pleJging themselves, if he did so, to —- rcsol the i tho 1 hail Mg'iss'J in F day' tho other evening are unnecessary. Yieldixo to the "unwritten law” of the Democratic party of the State, Governor McDaniel has retired from the guernatorinl contest. It remains to be seen whether this action will simplify or involve the campaign. It would be un'ortunate for him and the State if his exit from like his entrance to the Governorship shonld be in any manner connected with a political bar gain or trick. The announcement of his retirement will create no surprise, as it had long since been discounted. Referring to Mr. Clevolsad's promises to Senator Enstis, the New J York Herald says; • “If the case is so had the President ewes it to himself, to his own good name, to make public, without hesitation or delay, tho names of the Senators, Representatives and others who have deceived him into making any nominations which are so unfit that even bis own party ask him to with draw them.” This is right, and the Presi dent in order to redress the wrongs done to the Democratic party and the country, and to carry out the spirit of reform, shonld de mand the resignation of a number of his appointees who have been confirmed, and in cose of refusal, Bhonld suspend them promptly. He shonld not hesitate at any- thing calculated to restore "the health and vitality of the Democrats.” T/a Where Crlu.e Fall* Hen*lent. Cre of the biulileiit features of the lute e*«cnUon in New Orleans of the murderess of Cspt. Morphy was the parting between Ford and his family, a wife and five young children. Through al! the fifteen month* Ural have paaaej since the commission of tho crime for which Fold wee convicted, 'lie baa labored with every energy to save h'x life. Haggard and broken, believing in bi. innorvnee, (became to the cell ot the doomed men on the fatal eve of his death aid The Augusta Chronicle has this to say with reference to the proposition ot Judge Simmon*, to leave the choice of the next Democratic candidate tor Governor of Georgia, to four connties: "The Demo cratic party of the State ot Georgia will not consent to any settlement of the Guberna torial question by one county or a cluster of counties. The Gubernatorial canvass in this State ha* fairly begun, and is exciting interest among the people. Every Demo cratic voter in the state is interested in the question as to the gentleman who slrall be nominated for the high office of Governor. The nomi nating convention will not meet till mid summer. The indications are that the rank and file of the Democracy will have practically decided the pending question before the date referred to. This is the more probable in view of the canvass now being made by the distinguished aspirants for Gubernatorial honors. Bnt the choice between two leading candidates—Major Bacon and Judge Simmons—chonld not be decided by Bibb county, or by Bibb and the counties contiguous thereto. It dne Major Bacon to say that while be and hia friends are confident of carrying Bibb county, neither he nor they fevor any snch proposition. We know that Major Bacon's position, succinctly stated, is, rbei the Democracy of the State does not, and ought not, recognize (he claim of any conn- chill reason wns a parent,—Detroit Free There is a lingering, lurking suspii that Carl Schurz and Dorman B. have gone off somewhere and oiynni&d condolence meeting.—Philadephia Presi Tho Rev. Joseph Oook says: “If I k dog which smoked 1 would shoot him.' would any man. Tho rascal would as as not sneak in and steal all the cigara. Chicago News. We heard a little four-year-old child to its mother who hnd threatened to spasi] her if she did no* keep quiet at the diow| tabic: “Yon tant do it. I’se sittin' on Warrenton Clipper. If the rates on fourth-class mail mi are increased it would merely signiiy thil our beloved country is suffering from bulky surplus of fifth-class statesmanship Philadelphia Press. Tho art of smiling, while one is phobl graphed, is taught in Pittsburg. It in smile different from the one used at bilk when being presented to a partner for th dance. — Picayune. It is evident that the pension rolls shod have a careful overhauling. Voting for Jia Blaine is not exactly tho kind of patriot*] service for which the public should pay fu sions.—Chicago Times. A California statute forbids tho sale of | liquor within one mile of the StatoUni-l vorsity grounds. Tho Legislature evidently realizes tho value of walking as an oxorcui| for studious young men.—Boston Post. Tho Kentucky treasury is empty, and! sorno ot the members of tho Legishton have been unnblo to get their pay. Happy old Kentucky! Then her Legislature is ton] adjourn before long.—Now York San. A Boston Indy last summer attended funeral in a country church. After'' fl»| singing of n hymn, a man who was sitting besido her remarked: "Beautitnl kytur, isn’t it, ma'am? The corpse/wroto il“- Boston Beacon, The cable gives an account of tho antial f a crazy man on the Paris bourse. Tb] honrso cannot fie much like our Amerii boards of trade nnd stock exchange!, they couldn't tell a crazy man from asj body else.—Chicago Times, Polygamous Mormons are being s;»| tenccd to prison at the rate of five daily When one considers that each leaves on u average of fivo widows some idoa of tb extent of marital destitution in Utah mi)| he formed.—Chicago Tribane. Mr. Grow, do yon think the RepubB-l cans will elect the next President?" "V* think they have ( sure thing] next timo. Cleveland U the high-wiW mark of the non-partisan experiment i> government.”—Cincinnati Enquirer. The last reception of the season having been given, the diplomatic corps and Ib army and the navy officers at WoMliingtj* will have time to rest up a hit preparstorj to the arduous task of drawing their f*I for tho current quarter.—Chicago New*. Logan declared the other day that lie «• as sincere a friend of the negro as thm was on the floor of the Senate. Perhap; bnt he was the only man in the Sena* whose name is linked with the pnmuge it the infamous "Black Laws" against the m - gro.—Courier-Journal. It is officially denied that Mies J* - Chamberlain, tho Cleveland beanty, «*• called the Prince of Wales Jnmbo; hut, * this wa* by all odds the brightest rem»d Miss Jane has ever been accused of uiiku* we sincerely regret that a denial of its **■ thenticity has been entered.—Chicago S«»s A Washington newi item says: clerks in tho Federal departments h**s formed a mutual protective association, bf which any clerk who is discharge 1 recei"* the sum of (200 from his fellows to ensU* him to start afresh.” But the necessity 1 * such a thing is not apparent. A sntfieb** protection is a President who eontinurs <• warn off oil the wicked Democrats »*• would like their jobs.—Chicago Times. A possible reason why Mr. Evarts s w* - tory does not make a greater impression '* the country is given by a western N‘* Yorker. Ho had attended n meeting at “* Cooper Institute, where the great nu* spoke. Dropping into a store in the neig borhood ho observed that he bad been o at the Institute bearing a speech. ^ speaking?” asked the storekeeper. Evarts.” “Ah! And what is he tatt* abont?” “Well, I dunno; ho dids t s»f- —[Brooklyn Eagle. — Yon Have a lYrfeel Bl*n*» when you demand a Uensons Cnpcine OA I dninri.1. to expect to receive one. let tee I we rezret to ear. a few draoMs of the I variety who will try to persuade you hr erere — I worthies* eubetitule with a eUalfar sooadW* ^ I eueb as •Ce|*irtn." •■Capsicum." -** I Sirin*.- etc., prefixed sutoetimes with ■trin*.~ etc., prefixed sometime* eun y-- . I ••Burton," or ••Heaton." Cheap Johniwffl I one ot these wretched imitations foe hair “J/Jd I of lb# Jeuntne. se he ran well J a«CA 1 value hetufi nothtnz, aad IU root bel laG I U* aeon's are the only porous pu«*erv w w I depended upon to euro everjatlmoat O* I Uraal treatment. Thoy ais prompt, sate I u-wrh. Protect yoarself afiatasS deewptma ot reliable dramrletreaty. Th* Y, ■Three Heels" trad* mark and haa thaword etna" cut la the centre.