Newspaper Page Text
■ FOIHiAKS.
BUT HE HAD THE DRUG CLERK TO
BLAME FOR IT
Pne* More the Little Gera, so Cob*
bier Tries to Attract Trade, but, ns
Isual. Gains Nothing; Except Sams
Very Inpleasant Experiences.
ICopyright, 1900, by C. B. Lewis.!
One day vhen I tells dot drug ctork
on der corne’- dot peesness vhas poor
urul rnaype I can’t pay my rent hs
looks at me und says:
“YUell, you vhas not a sharp may o.
yon make fife dollar a day.”
“How can 1 be sharp?” 1 says.
“It vhas ash easy ash some grease. In
dis country eaferypody vhas oop to
some leetle schemes. You must bo
oop too. I look at your sign, und he
reads, ‘Hans Jacobs, Cobbler.’ Vhell*
who cares for dot? Does somepody
stop und wonder who Ilaus Jacob*
vhas? Not a bit of it. If you > ho*
sharp, you shall be somepody else. r
“Eut I can’t be somepody else.”
“Oh, yes, you can. 1 shall make yjw
a sign, und he vhill read. ‘Der Sher¬
man Count.’ My brudder vhas a re¬
porter. nud he shall put it in der pa¬
pers dot you vhas a count from Sber
many who must mend shoes because
you haf lost all your money. In two
days one hoouered peoples vhill come
to your shop, lt vhill be romance, you
know. 1 belief in one year you shall be
a rich man."
“But I vhas no count,” 1 says.
“Nefer you mind about dot. May pa
you vhas better ash fife count*. 11
vhas der advertising und der ptfoness
you vhant. Schemes. Hans, schemes—
eaferypody vhas oop to schemes, und
if you don’t come along you vhas left.”
VheU. it looks all right, und I vhaf
glad, und in three days dot piece vhaa
in der paper und dot sign vhas oop.
Dot papei' says I vhas once a rich ruos
in Sbermauy und play billiards mit der
king, but I vhas poor now und h<f to
mend shoes for a lifing. It vhas 4
splendid article und makes rce praod
und ash queek ash I open my is
der morning a woman comes ;« 6
shoe, und a man comes in for’£ »ai
patch. More ash dwenty p^op'wg etop
on der sidewalk und look in by der
window to see der Sherman count faf
im
Ti a- if ft PJ
i W4 r>
i m
■■
-
A SURPRISE FOR HAN A
work.. In one day I haf fceftcJN sbobf
und make four dollar, unit Aot rlrjfi
clerk hits me on der back u?d says:
“Hello, old mans, but didn’t I tell
you how she vhas? It vhas all in
leetle schemes. You keep right oa,
und you shall roll in gold.”
It vhas ail right for one day, but
der next morning a man comes in mH
a shmile on his face und shakes hand*
und says:
“Count, how you vhas? 1 don’t aM
you for dwenty years. 1 vhas teecklafi
to meet you. How vhas der countMW
und der leetle countems? Don’t yw
remember me?”
“I can’t say I do.”
“Vhy, count, 1 vhas dot Baron Klop
infeldt who used to Ilf next door
you in Shermauy, und we used to drink
cocktails und shinoke together. Vhas
I changed so mooch? I should know
you in one minute. You vhas der sam*
old mans.”
“Vhell, do you vhant some shoes fix¬
ed?” 1 says.
“Oh. no! My shoes vhas all rlgbA
but 1 shust call in for dot two dollai
you borrowed of me in Sbermaay. 1
need him in my peesness shust now. I
didn't know vhere you vhas till 1 seat
him in der paper. Come down mit det
sugar.”
“But I don’t know you in Shermany,”
tl says.
! “Look oudt, count. If somepody call*
'pie a liar, he vhas six months by day
iospital Vhell. 1 must baf dot money.”
if some policemans don’t com*
An g I vlias a licked man. It vha% it
trow escape, und ma.ype V» don’t
t0 b " C0Uflf iiun’t quite yit
- •
SHfer bein scared vhen in comes a girl
She vhas a nursegirl. She read* la der
paper aboudt dot Sherman count, und
she looks at me und says:
“Ah. it vhas too bad, too bad! Sooch
a fine iookin man! Sooch ears und eyes
und nose! Count. I vhas only a young
girl, but I vhas true hearted, und 1
shall marry you und help you to ba u
great man again.”
“But I vhas married.” I says.
“Vhell. we shall elope together und
lif on some desert island.’’
“But how can we? 1 must mead
shoes.” [
“Count Jacobs,” she says, “fio vt>i"
spurn some young girl's lofe? If you
do, beware!”
Ely wife comes out of der beck room
mit der broomstick und chases her
oudt of der shop, und it vhas Bad times
for me for half an hour. M. Q»jub.
The Pence Came.
The ghastly rider on the white bone
stopped at the gate.
“I am Death.” he said to thfl sick
man who was watching from ths win¬
dow.
“You are welcome,” replied the latter
aud added In a whisper: "If you value
your life, don’t let my wife see you ty¬
ing your horse to tbat tree. She'd nev
or let anvbody do that ”
Heading s Boole.
A writer iu the New York Medical
Journal says that the curved pages of
the ordinary book are Injurious to the
eye of the reader. The curvature ne
cessftates a constant change of the to
ens of the eye as it reads from one side
to another, and the ciliary muscles are
uuder a constant strain. Moreover,
the light falls unequally upon both
sides of the page, further interfering
with a continued clear field of vision.
It Is suggested that the difficulty might
be obviated if the lines should be print¬
ed parallel to the binding instead of at
right angles to It ______
BRUDDER GARDNER.
Some WlK SajiBB* by the 014 CaV
ored Philosopher.
[Copyright. 1900 , by c. B. Le*i».l
Ebery man should hov a fa r opinyun
ob hisself, but when he gits to thinkla
how inichtT iiic€ lit? uni h6 siioolu ruo
fur a political , office. a- He 11 ^ won t har hev ♦. tt
wait ober ftf weeks to find out da*
half de public at least has alius regard
ed him as a fool an a knave.
I has got $37 in de bank an a root
Strr^Jf JS ST 2
lookio tur soft .oops Is a heap mo
sartln to cotob do small,..I Jan to pit
o coat,' ob popcoa for 2.
I has alius tried to make , myself ... to
lieve dat honesty was de best policy.
but when I come to figger up how
much bone de butcher has left in mj
meat an how much hi own paper de
grocer has weighed In " ^ my tea I
fall t° wonderin if I hadn t orter tried
to work oft lc\en eggs fur a dozen.
Many a man has gone through life
widout too much bein said ag’in him,
but arter his death de widder has spoil¬
ed it all by erowdiu too much into de
epitaph. 1 nebber really got mad at de
mau who cheated uie in a mewl trade
till he died and 1 saw de epitaph op
his gravestone, readln, “It am mo’
blessed to give ilau to receive, an ob
such am de kingdom ob heaven.”
M. Quad.
Spraklnc From Experience,
“One half of the people of this world
would knock the other half down and
laugh while they were doing It,” said
the man on the rear platform of tb«
car.
“You haven't any grounds whatever
for such a pessimistic remark,” said
the argumentative individual. “What
makes you thiuk so?”
“Because i used to stick my hea*
through a hole in a canvas and let peo.
pie try to bang baseballs at me for 9
cents a bang,” came the answer. “1
know a few things about this beautiful
brotherly love, I guess!”—Indianapolla
Sun.
She Was Sensitive.
“Your face Is like an open book,”
sighed Mr. Softeigh to Miss Gooph, ac¬
companying the remark with what h«
thought was ills most winning smile.
“If I had as big a mouth as yours, I
would not talk about other people’s!”
sniffed the young lady as she flounced
out of the room, thus teaching the
young man to cling to the good, old, un¬
mistakable taffy talk when be desires
to be complimentary.
The Phllosophr of It.
“Why, sir,” exclaimed the erudite
Chiuaman, “we have forgotten more
about civilization than you ever knew."
“Yes,” exclaimed the practical Cau¬
casian, “but anybody knows that t
very little wisdom remembered is befi
ter than a whole lot forgot.”—Wash
Ington Star.
How It Is of Benefit.
“If your medicine Is nothing b«k
colored water with a little sirup in (%
how can you claim that it does an,
good?”
“Why, if they believe what I say *
constitutes a sort of a mind curt,
doesn’t it?”—Chicago Post.
flood lienson.
“What makes you think that he is 1*
sane?” said one attorney to anothei
who were discussing their client in 4
heart to heart talk.
“Why, the idiot actually wanted
plead guilty.”—Indianapolis Journal.
A Shrewd Observer.
“Dat kid goes ter Sunday school Ai
likes it,” remarked the firat boy SD v f»
lngly.
“How d’yer know?” asked the otha*
“ ’Cos he calls it Sabbath scbooL)^
>
Philadelphia Press.
Doubtful.
“They Bay old Skinner has moDap
burn."
“That’s a mistake. If he bad, K.
would have some hopes of taUVag
with him when be
Bulletin.
A Real Vacation.
“You afid your wife don’t seem
talli to each other mueb when
travel.”
“No; we agreed before we start**
that we’d get rested."—Chicago
ord.
None Esoopes.
“How many boarders dots*, Mrs.
Prooiis take in this summerf Mkefl
Skidds.
"All of them,” replied Spadd‘> —Dy
troit Free Press.
Considerate,
& II
"Sill Jm
Sufy/J
Cl
.a
“Now, little hoy, what should yot
say after I have given you the penny?"
"On de dead, mister. I’d hate ter teH
yer in de presence of a lady I”—New
York Journal.
Didn’t Know Dore.
In discussing the want of compre¬
hension of one branch of art for anoth¬
er Mr. Sutherland Edwards says that
when Gustave Dore began to Illustrate
Ihe “Idylls of the King” Tennyson did
not even know him by name,
“I wonder what they are going to do
with my luylls’ next,” he said to a
friend. “They have now got a man
called ‘Dore’ (without the accent) to 11
lustrate them.”
„ fi ’“hT Char
j otte „
“Yes; I read something today, and 1
wanted to talk to you about It, but I
think what It was.” —
Record.
THE PC I R OF BEAUTY.
A Barela r Who Preferred a Klu to
Keep:.-.* the Sir*(.
<*j fancy,” sc I a handsome woman
3 j go or m oro, "that there is as mudi
trutj, a „ poetry in what has been said
_ • . Is . M&S . said .. about the , of
power *
woman , . b aut . ° „. f lt ls
8 « - v - cours *’ Ba P
lt > a t ° n l)‘ poets know anything
about the matter, but I can bear testi
mony of a different sort, and it is from
my own experience. When I was a
*»r d “" T “VVV'r 7 “
1 bM.M-7iW fo?'l *a, witter tot SO, !2
“ w pirt tbat £" on ,,nlioart
or was there, tboupb 1 was not eon
eipeTienee of jts strength until after mv
-j u ved ; , a southern city of 25,000
p^pje an ,i one nigl)t j attended a
dauce a half Jozcn blocks from my
home and di{] not g( . t baek until j
o’clock in the morning, my escort being
the gentleman who is now my husband,
He proposed to me that uight, and
when I came into the house I fancy I
must have been prettier than I ever
was before, for I never was so happy,
The house was still, for the only people
In It, except two old servants away
back in the L, were my father and
mother, who had gone to bed hours
before. I slipped up stairs to my room
as quietly as a mouse and turning up
the gas I was confronted by a burglar,
who pointed a pistol at me and told me
not to make any noise or he would kill
me. I didn t faint, because I was so
happy that It Inspired me, I suppose,
f u< ... ! * st f o0 , 8t 11 , lo “ klng , , at ... him „ He
‘
looked at me, too, dressed , , in my best
gown and shining with a lot of jewels,
for our family had some fine diamonds
and other things of ornament that had
descended to me, and like most south¬
ern girls I liked to wear them even
when it was not in the best taste.
‘“I wouldn’t hurt as pretty a girl as
you arc for the world,’ he said with a
bow; Tuit I’ve got to have the shiners,
so Just take them off and hand them
over, while I pick up what I can find
lying around loose.’
“With trembling fingers 1 took off
my handsome jewels while he gathered
up all he could find on my dressing
case and put them In his pocket, keep¬
ing the pistol pointed at me. He was
not a bad looking man, and as I put out
my hnnd to him with the Jewelry in lt
I smiled at him, as frightened as I was,
and asked him If he wouldn’t go right
away. But he did not take the Jewelry
and he did not go away. He simply
stared at me In undisguised admiration
and took out of his pockets the
he had gathered from the dressing case.
‘“If you will excuse me, miss,
Impertinence,’ he said, ‘I’ll say to you
that you are the prettiest girl I
saw in my life, and I always did ad¬
mire pretty girls. I hate to rob you like
this, and If you will let me kiss you,
just on your elicek where it Is pinkest,
I’ll leave everything else and take only
the remembrance of that as a reward
for this night’s job.’
"This time I did almost faint, but 1
tried to be strong and succeeded so
well that I kept my wits. It was some¬
thing dreadful to be kissed by a bur¬
glar, but be was so respectful and
ly did admire me, and besides I was
saving several thousand dollars’ worth
of Jewels, so I didn't say a word, but
Just turned my cheek toward him. He
took off ills cap. bent forward, touched
me on the cheek with his lips and stood
baek with ills pistol in his hand.
“ ‘Now, if I may trouble you to to
go
the front door with me,’ he said, ‘so
that if anybody should see me coming
out it will not cause any remarks, I
will relieve you of my presence, which,
I assure you, would never liaVe occur¬
red had I known as much as I know
now.’
"I thought I never could do it, but 1
did, ami I stood in the door till he dis¬
appeared around the corner; then I col¬
lapsed utterly, and the night watch¬
man found me there 15 or 20 minutes
afterward arul vrntsed the house. By
the time I knew enough to tell any¬
thing the burglar was far, far away.
The story got into the papers.of course,
and In a week or two I received a
of regret from my burglar, postmarked
Cincinnati, which was the only clew
we ever hail of him. But the
part of the story was not printed. I
kept that to myself, and the first
son to whom I told it was nty
and he was gallant enough to say
the burglar had got the better part
the bargain.”—New York Sun.
Care of a Lawn Mower.
One of the most necessary and yet
one of the most abused of nil Imple¬
ments is the lawn mower. To sharpen
the knives is not a difficult matter.
do it remove the wheels and slip the
cogwheel off the end of the sbgff. A
little clutch will be found in a slof In
the shaft nt each end. Simply reverse
the positions of cogwheels and clutches
from one end of the shaft to the other,
so that the reel enn he run backward;
then replace tiie outer wheels and fas¬
ten them In place with either the nuts
or cotters. Witb the oil can run a little
oil along the edge of the lower knife.
Upon this oil sprinkle medium coarse
emery powder. Now turn the machine
upside down and push lt along the
lawn rapidly, the reel turning back¬
ward causing the emery to grind all
the knives. The wheels may then bo
taken off and the cogs and clutches re¬
versed, the emery carefully wiped off,
the knives adjusted, the machine oiled,
and It will be ready for use.—'Woman's
Home Companion.
Nice and Quiet.
Tommy—Can we play at keeping
shop in here, mamma?
Mamma (who has a headache)—Yes,
but you must be very, very quiet.
Tommy—All right; we’ll pretend we
don’t advertise
Then She Missed It.
Wtggs— Poor old soul! She doesn’t
believe as much In the efficacy of pray¬
er as she did.
Waggs—Yon surprise me. She has
always been so extremely religious.
Wlggs—Yes. but the other day she
got ready to go into the city, and then
•be discovered that she had only ten
minutes in which to catch the train.
So she knelt down before she started
and for five minutes prayed fervently
that she might catch it — Catholic
Standard and Time*.
INSPIRED BY DREAMS
TRIUMPHS OF THE BRAIN ASLEEP
OVER THE BRAIN AWAKE.
Dramatic Achievements That Owe
Tlieir Being to the Mysterious
Workings of the Mind Under the
Subtle Influence of Slumber*
There are numerous authentic cases
In which, inspired by a dream a per
son has achieved in sleep something
ft ’““™ s *''* tl '” ,Ucre 1 '"“ tovc re >“ b "W»terj “” l0 '
■“ "»*>"*>
“ lrHl “ U<, « P"* 1 ™. a. very nearlj
aa PI»ened in respect to an artist whose
Pictures sold well and whose genius
tor color combinations was considered
a8 astonishing as his output.
The painter used to tell the creepy
s t 0 ry of how', going into his studio aft
er breakfast, he would often stand
spellbound at the fact that some super
natural “double” had been hard at
n 'ork upon his canvas during the night,
more than once obtaining cleverly an
effect in scheme or coloring that he had
strained after for days in vain. Here
' va8 something to make the strongest
brain i eel.
A » it continued at intervals after he
ha(1 trk ' c! locking the studio door and
placing the key under his pillow, the
effect can be better imagined than de
scribed, and it was only a chance acci
dent tha * at length burst the bubble,
£ot up one morning to find bis
dressing gowu streaked with a dry car
mine pigment, anil fragments of the
same material lay strewn about his
easel below. Impelled by a dream, he
had gone down there in the night to
paint, trodden upon the pigment, and,
automatoulike, picked up the pieces be
fore retiring again. And precisely the
same thing is known to have happened
to a well known worker in mosaics
some years ago. Ills mind continued
to work out schemes after bis body
had struck, and he would proceed to
his workroom and arrange designs, the
effect of which simply stupefied him
next morning.
At least one enduring piece of music
owes its inspiration and production to
a dream In the same dramatic way.
The _ singular distinction, in fact, is
claimed for several. It occurs at the
end of a famous Russian opera. For
weeks the composer had struggled with
his finale and had all but given lt up
In despair. The spirit of a certain
theme danced vaguely through his
overworked brain, but always eluded
him when he went to set it down
the orchestra.
One night, ns he lay asleep, it came
to him, grandly definite. He dreamed
that lt was an accomplished fact on
paper. Events showed that he must
have gone down stairs, played it trl
umphantiy over on his organ several
times and then written down
chords that had caused him so much
anxiety. Next morning the score sheets
were found neatly dotted and the finale
a great success; but, although his wife
had heard the organ going and even
remembered the tune played, the com
poser himself could only recollect the
dream itself and was absolutely at a
loss to account for the position in
which he was found—fast asleep
the keys. The brain had succumbed
lmmedlately the dream Inspiration had
taken a practical shape.
Equally dramatic, again, is the sto
ry often told of a struggling must
cian who had written a song which he
could not Induce any music
to risk publishing. The fact had prey
ed on his mind. One night he
that he had written a pathetic letter
a popular singer, inclosed lt with
scorned masterpiece, walked all
way to the vocalist’s house at
stead and pushed Ills envelope through
the letter slit there. He recollected
tie of it next morning, not having
casion to miss his manuscript, and
stoutly denied his landlord’s assertion
that he had left his bedroom and
for n nocturnal stroll. Shortly
ward, however, lie was astonished
receiving a check and a ticket for
concert, and then, especially when
heard his own song rendered at
concert, it nil flnshed baek to him.
had unconsciously acted upon
dream—owed ti is stroke of luck
to a somnambulistic Inspiration.
It goes without saying, too, that
most humorous things are
done by persons who retire to rest with
a fixed intention for the morrow in
their minds and nre discovered
ing out the scheme In their sleep.
The writer kndws a gentleman—nev¬
er suspected of acting upon
tions evolved in his slumber—who had
laid in a stock of enamel paints, with
which lie intended to decorate
rooms after a pattern not yet decided
upon. Some fantastic notion
ably must have presented itself as
slept. All unconsciously he proceeded
down stairs^n the small hours, mixed
all the oolorsr.vgetlier in a bowl and
started to daub the doors and walls
with considerably more determination
than taste. The result was a polychro¬
matic chaos, to say nothing of a bad
shock for the gentleman, who sprang
out of ills dream at the sound of a cry
from his startled wife.—Philadelphia
Times.
A (inn of London Humor,
“Well, gooilby, Mr. Green. It was so
nice of you to come. It does father
such a lot of good to have some cue to
talk to.”
“1 was delighted to come, Miss
Blown, but I’m afraid I’m not much
of a conversationalist.”
“My dear Mr. Green, don’t let that
trouble you. I-'ather's,Ideal listener is
an absolute Idiot, with no conversation
whatever, nud I know he has enjoyed
himself tremendously tonight!”—Lon
don Punch.
a nrrolue.
In a cemetery on the banks of the
St Lawrence river, near Prescott, is
an epitaph saying that the stone was
“erected to the memory of Elizabeth
Richardson, who heroically defended
the life of her lover by sticking a
pitchfork In a mad cow’s nose.” The
heroic Miss Richardson was 38 years
old when she died.
If a man has a good scheme and
makes money out of it, people call him
a genius; If be loses, they call him •
looLf-Chlcago New*.
WHAT THE TAILOR 8EE8.
Peculiarities of Mrs Being
For New Clothe*.
“Yes, there is a time for
out one’s chest. Inst as there Is a
for everything else,” 3aid the
as he read out one of the
ments for the customer’s coat,
the latter stood before him on the
tie pedestal.
"Now you probably have no
1116 tailor continued, as he
the “P? over the shoulder and
.
,heJ * t,u,d v “» “ be
ptopotU I «m °«< I»«
ate alw«T« mo« nalonl SALES' In your
Jone * sm iles ’, a “ d the tailor . „ note,
tK i,.?, 1 r T ° DeS * UFe 8 * 603 *
'
|u „ ntlnDed tbe mea surer
1<th CU8to er ts not always frank
, th than the Datlent j,
a i way s frank with telling a physi
c ] an about himself There are oppor
tunltles for deception In both eases,
For lnstance ' it very often occurs that
a man witb s i oplng shoulders come,
u t0 be measured, and instead of al
lowIng us t0 sIze Wm up as he reaUy lg>
he tbr0 ws himself ail out of position,
and there Is the deuce to pay generally
when it eomos around tryIng on the
garment> for he cannot a lways strike
the game pogltlon twlce> much less
keep , t Some men would no more
admlt tb at their shoulders needed
‘reising- or ‘lifting,’ as we say, than
they would be ready to confess that
tbeIr ca i vea needed a little re-enforce
ment. Imagine what we occasionally
get from a new custome r-and it Is
incidentally true that these deceivers
are the one g who do the most shifting
f roIn one tailor to another as a result
0 f , b is lack of personal frankness!
They are the ones who seldom get suit
ed anywhere.
“Of course, there is an opportunity
0 f us i ng t ac , w ltb this sort as well as
in many other ways of our business. It,
0 f course, would never do in the world
for us t0 say t0 some m en, ‘Shall I
no j pu { a uttie in the shoulder. Just
t0 ju out a
- To be sure, we can say, and witb
perfect sincerity, that coats are being
cu t this season to set squarely as pos
a ible on the shoulder, but there are men
wk o won’t stand for that sort of thing,
aa ‘they know what they want.’ At
aay rate, they would have us believe
they know, and it is a temptation to
give a man what he wants, even if
one realizes there may be loss of busi
ness on account of it in the long run.
But it !s not always loss of business,
f or there are kinds of customers that
ar e almost perpetually a loss—in wear
an <j tear on our nerves. If not in actual
work. Tailors have nerves, by the
way, although they are not sometimes
g i ve n credit for having any.
“it i s the best all round method to
give the man what we think he wants,
or> a t least, what we think he should
have, taking down all the while with
the nod of respectful and obedient
understanding all that he prescribes
f or Himself. That’s a confession, sir,
but one has to meet the grand bluff
w ith the same brand once in awhile,
“This man who throws out his chest
comes in many different species. One
may owe us a trifle too much to bp ex
ac tly 0 n the level, and his financial dlg
nity comes to the surface, something
by way of a ‘very ready help in time of
present trouble.’ He doesn’t want us
to assume any undue pressure and he
needs some clothes. We can tell him
as B ooa as he heaves in sight. But we
respect him by comparison with the
vainglorious ones who twist them
selves out of shape. We get the first
of the trouble when he Is on the stand,
and it shows up when he tries on the
coat. When up before the three sided
reflector he usually expands the limit,
a nd the cutter may have to tell him to
‘stand perfectly natural, please.’ After
doing the best we can, and the coat is
til made up, he will find something
wrong, or, perhaps, it may not crop out
until his wife sees him as he Is. There
are so many parts that show poor fit.
The shoulders may sag, the back
wrinkle and, worse than all things else,
the collar may sag down. The collar
obviously may set in perfect position
when he has his chest out and big bead
erect, and when he falls into his cus
tomary lag or stoop the thing doesn’t
hang 6nug—and he is back upon us
with grievances.’’—Boston Herald,
Candid.
A bachelor farmer a little past hia
prime, finding himself bard up, thought
the best thing be could do would be
to marry a neighbor of b!s who was
reputed to have some bawbees.
Meeting with no obstacles to bis woo
tnjf be soon got married.
One of his first purchases be made
with part of her money was a horse.
When fie brought It home be called out
h» wife to «ee it.
After admiring it she said, “Well,
tots, if it hadua been for my siller lt
wadaa ba* been here.”
"‘Jenny.” Sam replied, “if it hadne
beod for yer siller, ye wadna hae beea
»«•« yM*el!”- -London Answers.
— *> -MSA' >- - -
Tit* Ulr y* l«c Valiev Poisonous.
That delightfully fragrant and grace¬
ful Sower, the lily of the valley, Is de
WSTffsd by the German papers as
under Its simple beauty veiling a dead¬
ly poison. It ia stated that both the
stalks and ihe flowers of this lovely
plant contain prussic acid. H Is ex¬
tremely dangerous to put the stalks
Into cue's mouth, as, If the sap hap¬
pens to get Into even the tiniest crack
In the lips, it produces swelling, often
accompanied with severe pain. It is
also advisable not to throw the dead
flowers where birds can get at them.
* or ** ie - v ‘ff'en cause the depth of
T °" 112 fowls and pigeons.
More FoenniiiiK Than Labor.
"Nancy, did the doctor sny you had
nervous prostration from overwork?"
“No; 1 told him how my shirt waists
and high collars worried tue, and he
said my eouditlon was brought on by
trying to look stylish and keep clean.”
—Detroit Free Press,
What He Got.
‘Tardon me,” said the suitor as he
picked himself up at the bottom of the
f l ,een ront a ste misunderstanding P s • ‘‘ but thore seems somewhere. t0 bave
1 asked for >' our daughter’* hand, aa4
J. have received your foot”—
. . H. V. JOHNSON . ■
Practical Watchmaker.'
REPAIRS
x BICYCLES, GUNS, PISTOLS
i\ SEWING MACHINES,
T MUSICAL INSTRUMENTS.
Repair Work of All Kinds.
Store on Railroad Street, near D. & S. depot.
Shoe and Harness
Repairing.
I am prepared to do first
class Shoe and Harness
Repairing at reasonable
rates and on short notic<
and Breeching other straps, tie reins
parts of harness
kept on hand for sale.
Having added a stitching
machine, I am better pre¬
pared than ever to do first
class shoe repairing.
Respectfully,
T. A. Wilson.
Ths Johnson Houss.
Permanent and transient
Boarders can get good ac¬
commodations at reasona¬
ble rates at the Johnson
House, on the Court House
square.
By the Mouth, $10 siiul $12.
Single Meats, 25 Cents.
A share of the public pat
ronage is solicited.
* * * Mrs, A. M* JOHNSON,. ♦ ♦
♦ ♦ ♦ * Proprietress*.
Savannah & Statesboro Railway
TIME TABLE IN EFFECT DEC. 24, ls'.i'.i.
y No 3. I l No. a. m. t I_ | (Trains Standa run rd by Time.) Central i j~No,2 i a. m. I j p* V). m* 4
.
__
515 B00 Leave Statesboro Arrive | i !t 45 j f 51
5 28 8 12 “ Pretoria “ 9 331 9 00
5 :i'J 8 28 “ Nellwood •• | it i; 8 45
. I
5 4,’ 8 35 * Sbearwood “ I 9 11 8 4?
.
5 53 8 40 Irk " | 9 0S 8 41
i; ?E Stilsou ” | 8 56 I 8 35
8 15 1 W Woodburu “ 8 41 8 24
J) 23 7 12 Ivanhoe “ 8 38 s 10
* 7 20 i liiicv “ 8 32 8 08
|0 40i 7 27 F.ldora 8 26 03
0 48 7 30 BUtchton 8 20 145
7 00 j j 7 48 Cuyler 8 (19
8 25 8 40 ! Arrive Savannah Leave j 7 25 6 30
All trains make close connection at Cuyler with
G. A A. trains to and from Savannah.
W. F. WRIGHT. Gen’l Supt.
Lever 2i States’porc L. L.
Schedule In effect September 11th, 1899.
Going Itertn- l E»~ 5^ T< oTT no TT No T
L’ve Statesboro i I 5 ldatu | U50am 3 15pm | 7 15pm
" Clito 5 25am ID D5am 3 30pm T 30pm
Arrive Dover ___15 45am 110 25am 3 50pm ! 7 50j nu
Trains No. 1 and 8 dally. Nos. 5 and 7 Tuesdyas
Thursdays and for Saturdays only,
Passengers Savannah take Trains 3 ana 5.
For Macon. Augusta, Atlanta and all Western
potato take Trains 1 and 7.__
Going So uth I No 6 I No 2 I No 4 So 8
Leave Dover | 8 Warn [ V 00am | f 20pm i 8 lupm
Arrive Clito i 8 25am ! 11 15am I 4 35pm I 8 26pm
" Statesb’ro 8 45am 11 30am 4 50pm 8 40pm
_
Thursdays Trains No. and 2 and Saturdays 4 daily-. Nos. 8 and 8 Tuesdays!
Take Trains 2. 4, 8 and 8 only. Dover for
at Statesboro
Blast ot whistle 15 minutes before departure
trains at Statesboro. J. L. MATH EWS, Bupt,
Factory Loaded Shotgun Shells,
“Leader” and “Repeater” loaded with Smokeless
powder and “New Rival” loaded with Black powder,
Superior to all other brands for
UNIFORfllTY, RELIABILITY AND
STRONG SHOOTING QUALITIES. ;
Winchester Shells are for sale by all dealers. Insist upon
having them when you buy and you will get the best.
172 s
$
J
ft
B/ actsveWide ^wal^e
% a ft. K! Young Men
L*. ■otsj j||^"Vvqo < •f'VfONIEN
■=_ m 1aKe our practical
JPK ; usii\ 6 ss (oiirse
ESTABLISHED IS^is
COLLEGES.} BUSINESS _____ r s 7 1/
Send for Catalogs#'
EAKK 07 STAT2SBQR0.
CAPITAL 550,00(1.00.
Accouuts of Firms and Individuals Solicited.
i>. 11. l.ROOVKH, PBKSJDEST.
J. L. COLEMAN. CASHIER.
DIRECTORS:
H. S. BLlTCil, D. R. GROOVER,
J, F. Brannfn, J. \7 OLLIFF,
J. A. FULUIER, B. T. (JUTLAND,
W. c. Parker.
Hi
RySf §
i
Tm
&
mi
rx. - V
1554 MILES
OF
WQaERfi RAILWAY
TRAVERSING THE
Finest Frim,
Agricultural,
Timber, anc
Mineral Lands
IN THE SOUTH I
THROUCH RATES AND TICKETS
FURNISHED UPON APPLI¬
CATION TO ALL POINTS
North, South,
£
'9 ■m
ft t
AW
Central of Ceorgia Railway.
Ocean Steamship Co.
FAST FREIGHT
AND LUXURIOUS
PASSENGER ROUTE
to Mew York;
Boston the East,
Complete Information. Rates. Schedule! ql
Trains and Sailing Oates ot Steamers Cheat
fully Furnished by any Agent of the Company.
THEO. D. KUNE.
Gantral Supt
E. H. HINTON. J. C. HAILE,
Traffic Managei. Gta’I Pass Aft