Newspaper Page Text
HOUSTON HOME JOURNAL
Published Weekly at
Perry, Ga.
JOHN L. HODGES, Publisher.
RUBY C. HODGES. Editor.
Official Orpran of Houston County
and City of Perry.
Subscription, $1.50 per year.
Entered at the Post Office in
Perry, Ga.. as Mail Matter of
Second Class.
Condensed translation of Ger
man communications to Japan
concerning Uncle Sam: “You
hit him, I’m busy.”
0
The best regulator on a stove
is the hand that pays the bills.
0
For retreating Italians, it may
appear that all roads lead to
Rome, but there aren’t enough
of them.
0
The average American family
consists of 0.8 persons. The eight- (
tenths must be father.
Biggest complaint fifth-column
ists have against America is that
Uncle Sam just won’t listen to
treason.
A man who gives in when he j
is wrong is wise; the man who
gives in when he’s right is mar- j
ried.
A horse may pull you out of a
ditch, but horse sense will help
to keep you from getting in.
Fortune tellers are pretty
dumb, but they aren’t as dumb
as those who believe in fortune 1
tellers.
n
The wind isn’t worrying the
college man this season. u'b:
the draft.
And there was the so, homon j
who thought a mushroom was a 1
place to make love.
Ask the fellow who says the
world owes him a living *o make
out an itemized invoice of goods
delivered and services u.iu.nd.
0
No doubt, when the Nazi‘‘puls
on the dog” it means he is pre
paring for dinner.
The man who keeps his chest !
sticking out all the time may be
hiding something.
- o
American Indians never harm
ed a feeble minded pers >n. i m
believed them to be possessed oi
the great spirit, an 1 tr<ale>
them as small children, w.u
kindness and care.
- ■ - O
Ancients believed that tin elk
pul his left hind iuva u> n.a kill
ear to cure himself of tailing
sickness, so they used the kit j
bind leg of an elk as a cine U.i
epilepsy.
. 0—
Soup made from crows i- us d
in Mexico as a cure for asthma.
Scientistd have quit worrying
about “How doth the little bum
hie bee improve each shining
hour” since they have discover
ed that an antidote to rbeuma ,
tism can be extracted with its
sting.
n
If you waht to get an idea ol
the actual size ol a germ, look at
a drop of water and imagine ii
inhabited by 2,000,000 of the!
Jit tie cusses.
0
In Arkansas they believe in
a "bark fora bite” so they soak
cherry bark in sweetened water
and use it for coughs.
0
Another proof that men are
but little boys grown tall ninety
per cent of the licorice consumed
in the U. S. is used in tobacco.
o
Don’t scoff at the man with
the overgrown beard, the an
cients wore long beards as pro
tection against sore throat.
0
If you can’t cure a headache
any other way, try rubbing a
glass rod with a silk handker
chief. It used to be considered
a good remedy. i
LOST HER FRIEND
One day a lady entered a large
establishment and asked to eee
some blanket*.
After she had viewed a quantity
of blankets and not made any pur
chases, the clerk said, "I am sorry,
madam, but I am afraid we have
no more blankets in stock.”
“It’s quite all right,” replied the
lady. ‘‘l am only looking for a
friend.”
“Madam,” said the perspiring
: clerk, “if you think your friend is
among the blankets, I would be very
pleased to go through them again
I for you.”
LEARNS SPANISH
Hubby—Do you notice any im
provement since you began eating
olives?
Wifey Why, don’t you know,
dear, I believe I am getting a de-
I cidcdly Spanish accent.
Well Experienced
i The very new recruit dropped his
rifle during drill. The sergeant could
hardly believe it. Seething with
rage, he confronted the trembling
| youth.
“Hey, you!” he roared. “How
: long have you been in the army,
I anyway?”
The answer was touching,
i “P-p-please, sir—all d-d-day, sir.”
Who Is She?
“Briggs,” said the owner of the
car, "I found this long blonde hair
i on the back seat of my car. My
1 wife’s hair is dark.”
“Yes, sir,” stammered the chauf
l four. “I can give you an explana
tion, sir.”
“Explanation nothing” was the
retort. “What I want is an introduc
! lion!”
Hand Me the Peroxide!
Professor—What is the outstand
ing contribution that chemistry has
given to the world?
Student—Blondes.
Could be Worse
Lady—Aren't you ashamed to
come to a house like this to beg?
Hobo—Ma’am, you ought t’see
some o’ th’ houses I’ve went to to-
I day I
True
Professor—D{. the quick thinkers
| become leaders?
Freshman—Well, he who hesitates
i* bossed.
NEVER AGAIN
“Why don’t you give a house par
ty some week-end at that wonderful
1 country place of yours?”
“Never again. The last time 1
did that the party was snowed up
and 1 had to feed the whole bunch
for nearly a week.”
Changing Times
It used to be the bedtime-story
i broadcaster who topped off a tale
of gore with “Sweet dreams, my lit
tle ones.” Now it’s a news com
! 'mentator who glooms over the
I iworld’s plight and signs off with
j '“Cheerio.”
Learned Ills Lesson
Geography Teacher—Now, class,
remember Iceland is about as large
as Siam.
Johnny (in tost paper)—lceland is
about as large as teacher.
How It Sounded
Visitor—Will I get any otter hunt
j ing here?
Native Well, you won't get
j colder.
Unusual
“The telephone girl next door
landed a husband a week after she
met him.”
“Pretty quick connection for a
! telephone girl to make.”
Silly question
Lady—Poor man! And are you
married? Beggar D'ye think,
ma’am, I’d be relyin’ on total
strangers for support if 1 had a
wife?
Studies Music
“Is your daughter going abroad
to study music?”
“No indeed! If the neighbors can’t
stand it, let them go abroad.”
The Usual Way
We put off ’til some better time
Dull duties of the present;
But any time is good enough
For follies that are pleasant.
Changed Doctors
“I understand you’ve changed
doctors.”
“Yes, the first one’s charges were
too ridiculously low for people ol
our standing.”
Souvenir
“A souvenir by any other name
would probably be called trash.”
Movies for Religious
Education Aid to Church
Churches and church groups
should take a hint from Hollywood
and make motion pictures for visual
religious education that are not only
inspiring, instructive and uplifting,
but technically as good as those
■ shown in theaters.
Bishop W. Bertrand Stevens so
advised delegates to the forty-sixth
annual convention of the Los An
geles Episcopal diocese.
Declaring that a present weak
ness of the church was the fact that
children drifted away from religious
affiliation at an early age, Bishop
Stevens urged three means of meet
ing this trend; an improved and sus
tained religious education program
extending over a longer period, a
wider use of visual education, and
a better program for adults.
'Too many children, now,” he
said, ‘‘attend Sunday school in their
early years and drift away from the
church at the age of 13 or 14. As a I
result, more than 50 per cent of
Americans are ‘pagan’ in that they 1
have abandoned identification with (
the church.” i
Pointing out that in many cases, |
church groups using motion pic
tures to strengthen a religious edu
cation program have relied upon
amateurish and poorly made films,
Bishop Stevens said:
‘‘We must have motion pictures
for this purpose that are not only
inspiring and instructive, but arc
commensurate in quality—not nec
essarily in spectacular extent but
in technical details—with the pic
tures that young people see in the
theaters.”
Such a strengthened program of
religious education, he said, would
help correct the ‘‘woeful and
pathetic ignorance” of many people
as to their place in Christian faith.
Tchaikovsky Revealed
Emotions in His Music
Peter Ilich Tchaikovsky, noted
Russian composer, revealed his per
sonal emotions in his music, full of j
depth and melody, somber and filled !
with unrealized longing. Critics see 1
in his compositions a reflection of |
his unfortunate romances.
Tchaikovsky fell in love with an I
opera star when he was 28. She
refused his proposal, married a [
baritone. At 37 he met and mar-1
ried Antonia Milioukov, but the'
marriage lasted only 13 days. The
real woman in Tchaikovsky’s life (
1 was Nadejda von Meek, a wealthy
widow, who became interested in the
young composer, paid him a yearly
allowance so that he could devote
all of his time to music. Although
they corresponded for 13 years, 1
wrote more than 3,000 letters, they
never met.
He visited the United States in
1891, played at the dedication of
New York’s Carnegie hall. He died
two years later from cholera, after
drinking unboiled 'water.
Catching Up on Coffee
Substitutes for coffee have ap-1
peared the world over. In France
and Italy chicory is usually mixed I
with it. And when the supply of I
coffee is very low, chicory is used
exclusively.
Here in the United States roasted
rye has been used as a substitute.
It is considered quite a good drink.
We can thank Cortez for the dis
covery of chocolate as a drink. When
Cortez was sent out by the Spanish
government to explore this new j
world discovered by Columbus, he |
went in search of gold. In Mexico, j
he and his men were entertained j
royally with strange food such as
corn, and strange drinks such as [
chocolate. The Spaniards loved it j
and took it back to Spain.
The Roman Catholic church con- 1
demned chocolate as immoral. Peo
ple were fascinated by this new vice,
and tried it on many occasions.
When finally the Church relented,
the monks used to drink it before
mass. Theoretically this did not
break their fast.
Prognosticator Uses Indian Method
William F. Hudson of Orange,
Mass., uses an old Indian “magic
formula” in making his annual long
range winter forecast. He says of
55 yearly predictions, 52 have been
accurate.
Here’s his system:
Find out when the first quarter j
of the October moon occurs. Count
the number of bright stars that ap- j
pear located about 30 feet from all |
sides of the moon. Look for a dull j
star above six inches from a bright 1
star. The brilliance of this extra j
star will determine whether there
will be one storm more or less than
the number of bright stars.
Hudson says that according to
the stars this year there will be ap
i proximately 26 storms in which
enough snow will fall for dog or cal
tracks to show.
Bad Teeth iu Children
Dental care for children from the
age of two on was urged recently
by Dr. John C. Bauer of lowa City,
at a dental convention in Los An
gelcs. “Two out of three children
have dental defects and the earlier
they are cared for the better,” he
said. Dr. Brauer's recommendation
for a child’s diet was as follows:
“An optimum of dietary regimen
with a reduction cf conccntratec
sweets. They should got a quart ol
milk, one or two eggs, two vege
tables, one tablespoon cf codliver ci
and three teaspoons of butter cacl
qJL Few |
M. Little ©
X , - I—-- 1
FOLLOWED INSTRUCTIONS
The new maid, preparing to serve
at her first dinner party, was in
structed by her garden-loving mis
tress to place a “little flower” in
each fingerbowl for the guests.
That point in the course of the
meal arrived, and to the hostess’
perplexity, she saw that no blos
| soms were floating about as planned, (
but that the water had a decidedly j
I murky nature.
( Asking the maid afterward as j
! to the cause of the murkiness, she
j was informed: “Why, ma’am, Ah
jes’ put in a little flour like you
tole me.”
Good Reason
“Don’t they teach you to salute in
your company?” roared the major
to Patrick Malone, who had passed
him without raising his hand.
“Yes, sir,” replied Pat.
“Then why didn’t you salute?”
“Well, sir,” Pat replied, “I didn’t
want to attract more attention than
necessary, because I’m not supposed
to be out without a pass.”
HASN’T DECIDED
| “Is your husband going south with
I you?”
j “I haven’t decided whether to ask
him or not.”
Vivid Memory
1 A Negro whose recollections of
( great men appeared to run back far-
I ther than one listener could stand
was finally asked rather sarcastical
ly:
“I suppose you remember the day
George Washington took a hack at
the cherry tree?”
i “Oh, yas, sah, I ’member dat very
1 well. Why, I done drove that hack.”
Time Will Tell
A boy in grade school refused to
sew, thinking it beneath the dignity
of a ten-year-old.
“George Washington sewed,” said
his teacher, “and do you consider
yourself better than George Wash
! ington?”
“I don’t know; time will tell,” re
plied the boy seriously.
Successful Bazaar
“Your club must have realized
quite a neat sum for the poor with
the bazaar.”
“It was quite a success. We had
a little supper afterwards and came
out just about even.”
Already Solid
“What did Miss Sharp say when
j Tom told her he would like to make
j himself solid?”
“She replied that so far as his
| head was concerned he would have
| nothing to do.”
Cause Enough
' Bystander—You took a great risk
in rescuing that boy; you deserve a
hero’s medal. What prompted you
to do it?
Johnny—He had my skates on.
Indispensable
“The banquet tonight can’t get
along without me.”
“You have a very good opinion
of yourself. Billed for a speech?
“No; I was invited to listen.”
WINTER RESORT
“My this must be one of those
Southern winter resorts one reads
about.”
Stone Age
Mrs. Highbrow—Don’t you find the
Stone age interesting?
Mrs. Lowbrow’—Yes, indeed! Jim- i
mie’s just that age now, but it’s I
awfully hard on our windows.
Takes the Cake
Bobby had been to a birthday
party. Knowing his weakness,
mother said, “Bobby, you didn't ask
for a second piece of cake?”
“No, ma’am. I only asked Mrs.
Smith for the recipe so you could
make some like it, and she gave me
two more pieces, just of her own J
accord.”
For Better Speech
"Joan can swear like a pirate.”
“It’s shocking, but you should say
‘like a piratress’!”
A FEW DOLLARS MORE
I | THAN SMALLER, |
| LOW-PRICED CARS!
|/ FLUID DRIVE ONLY *25 EXTRA '
| McLendon auto co.
Phone 57 Perry, Ga.
We Offer For Our Daily Trade
Choice Fresh Vegetables
Best Selected Fruits
Fresh Bread, Cakes
Select Staple Groceries.
For Prompt Delivery Call 8
W. B. SIMS
Phone 8 STAPLE & FANCY GROCERIES Perry, Ga.
Cotton Choppers
Don’t Sr end Money Chopping Cotton By Hand
Dixie Cotton Choppers will chop more in a day
than ten hands. Let us show you these machines.
Several good Used Tractors, Combines, Binders, Plows,
Harrows, and a complete line of New 1941 Model
Farm Equipment.
It will pay you to SEE US for Farm Supplies
and Equipment.
We have Binder Twine, Hoes and Handles, Scrapes, Scoot
ers, Sweeps, Walking Cultivators, Weeders, several Mules,
and Everything for the Farm.
We Appreciate Your Trade
Geo. C. Nunn & Son
Phone 31 Perry, Ga.
Calcium Arsenate
We have in stock Calcium Arse
nate for the control of 801 l Weevil
and will keep a full stock on hand
at ail times.
Ihe Corn Elevator will operate until June
15, so would like to have all the Corn you
wish to sel! before that time.
J. P. ETHERIDGE
Phone 45 - Perry, Ga.
ONLY THE BEST IN
Diamonds, Watches, China, Silverwear, Glassware
and a complete line of Jewelry
See our complete line of Wedding Invitations,
Announcements and Visiting Cards
Watch, Clock and Jewelry Repairing a Specialty
KERNAGHAN, Inc.
411 Cherry St. JEWELERS Macon, Ga.