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.gnwgrr mkali>. asn EVERY TITF.BDAV EVENING BATM: Oue tUI ! J a - - - - 75 - - - - so TlM** must lie paid in ft l ! ‘ u qn./if not renewed prompt vi.initi'-n will lie disomitln jy »t i‘ u r ‘ 1 Utnl. ADVERTISEMENTS ■' rlmraeter will be charg Ofutrousl “ iu , ! . t jiisertieu, and 50e 114 subsequent insertion li'i ,ea . ,riiie:itious intended fui l emdit. "iH be cnatgedfor advertised rates. . and newsy communica- any l>art of the county so jjtnisil 1 General Diretory. S CIVIL GOVERNMENT" S yl, Hut.-iiins. Judge Sup. Court. p's Pain. Clerk Sup. Court, jl'Lamkin. Ordinary. ■ V. F. Cosby, SPerUt. , « « M tV K. Brown. - S AiiJr.w>. I’inr- Receiver . jflß | \ \ rruer. Tax Oolleetorr ‘ B ‘X. Muffed, Surveyor. H j ii. Wilson, Coroner^ ,-01'Sn e i,M.MISsm»BRS. « I p ipenee. (’hairniun mil t’lerk, N J K Cloud, •>. K Hopkins, An ■ darner. boauoof K.nrerTtON. | p Winn. School Commissioner. J. i 1 * Spence, I' Fatillo, .J- Webb jH j,j \>l, I’ K Winn. ■■ jrSTICRS. ■ lawrennville, lb,lb diet —W. ( , ■ pale J. P. M. I, Adair, X. V. 1 -i Fri » lb ■ diet J. W. Andrews. ■ j.pChaHes McKinney. N. P. 3rd M Saturday. * ... S IJei, smitli’s, :il(i dist—W. I>. Simms JH | j, j p). Hawthorn, N. I’. 3rd Sal- V “tovCmA. llftioilisl u. J Baggett Mj i ',|. |. MeKivaney. N. F. I*l Sat urday. S , in -pi ad .1. M, Arnold,.l, j. j.;. JV, Nash, N . 1 •, 2nd Saturday. |B ('aiii' *s ■il'-’ir’ dist— A. Adams, J. F m p R Pool. N P* 3rd Saturday. m Duluth Klim dist. —W. F, Brewer, J. .S p„ Marion Itoberls. N I’.. Thursday U- H fore4th Saturday, B Harlun’s 178 dist —G. L. Knight BJ, I‘., J. W. Hamilton, N. F. B Thursday before Ist Saturday. . B Hug Mdaißain, 414 list—L. B jjjmui ns, ,T. F., W. L. Andrews, ’B N. T. 4tb Saturday. H,trim's. .714 dist -Asa Wright. P„ J. U. Nowell, N, I*. 4tli B Saturday- B Norcross. 4(Ki--W. It. Simpson, Bj. f. iA. .Martin. N. I’. Friday before' 3rd Saturday. I’” Rock Bridge, 571 dist—A. J. Lowery. J. F., E. ,T. Mason, N. F. 3rd Saturday. ■ Siewanee, 404th dist---T. N. Smith, J. F., A G. Harris, N. F. 3rd Saturday. Buford, 550th dis —T. C. Bur lon, J. P., ,1. M. Posey, N F. Fri day, before 3rd Saturday/ MI'NICIPAI. John C. Smith, Mayor. COUN'OII.. A I, Moore, K 1» lierrioS A Tttwnley \i J Hiowrr , > , AHRIVAI. AVI) DKI>ARTI'Rh: OF TRAIN Arrives from Suwonnee. 5 "'b-p. in . I,«ws lor Suwannee, 7 a- tm AHItWAt, anb bw aiUtirk <w iMtr. ' Jrri'Kasoii— Arrive 12 in, departs p.tu,, Monday and Thursday. Tmanes Stork.— Departs (i a m ar rives(j pm, Monday and Thursday. Looanyiu.e.—Arrives 10 a m, de— | parts 1 p pi.—Daily. Vkxlow River.— Arrives 12 m., de puts (i a m„\V (Tuesday and Saturday W. 11. IIaRYKY, P. i CUL'ROHRS hAfrisT--Rev J L R Barrett, pastor Service every Sunday. Mkthodmt—Rev M D Turner I’astor Services on the Ist and 2ml Sundays. SikDAV Sohoou —A T Pattillo, Supt bury Sunday at 3 p in Presbyterian--Rev J F M’eClelland, [t’aslor, Services ou 2nd nd 4th Sundays P»each month, Sunday School,—T It Powell. Supt herj Sunday at 9.3 b a nr I FRATKRNAy,. Lawrkncrviu.k Masonic Lodgr.— J Ds Pvnce W M., S A Hagood, S VV„ O.A'im JW. Meets on Tuesday light on or befoi e full moon jn each linonth. I Mt \ erxon Ohai'tkr. No 39, R A "■'-J D Spence, H P, A T Pattillo ■ f! ‘ Meets Fiiday niglii before the M Sunday in each month. Superior Court.—N. L. lutehiina. Judge. Convenes on the Ist ™daj in March and September. J, A, HUNT, attorney at law, NORCROSN, oa. Practice in.Uie Superior Courts .' ' '"Ji ts ot Ordinary of thecoun "l Uwinuett. and MMton, and in 1 iiiSi.-ca’ court of holh counties, "■'lulanrt prompt attention given f wiiiininei I Pel. Sl- 85-Omo. I letche,' M. Johnson ATTORNEY at law. rn,. dAINF.BVIT.LK, (i.V. I "I practice in tins ami adjoining | Wits, and the Supreme Court of .liie Kustiness intrusted' to life care [ i 2oTy 6 Pr ° mpt !lUen,io "-‘ R. H. V.. BRIAN I, j BTf bKNT at i.aw, ■ , Logansville, (la. ■ A ; 1 business entr isted to his K *ill receive prompt attention. ■ J ,Elions a specially. ■ipr-14-ly I Samuel €• POE, Intern* and Jiruh •* I T tneiffOH. ■ W, “f. W Wa«P?VILL.E, Ga. Hthh,. 115 method to inform the ■ abov» TlP r a V’ that he is still at ■ '*imr«.a r ’ aii is ~ow prepared ■i. 1n,,, , 1 i any kin ' of work in Huumfa !tl “ now iga ed in the “ f brick a,. I will do 8,,1<B ~l< - * 1,11 short not.ee. Satistac- Buiiv sniei-e. Contructiug a spec B - ______ may FI 3in. I lit IRNHAM. S ■ hi i m proved ■JS* STAND’D TURBINE “■ I lie host con-1 IT ted H :u, d linUhecl, give bet ■aa ,Pr Percentage. ■ ; Tel Power and is so I for Wpgftl-jy ' ' money per horse k“wer. tlian aim oilier .V#, lorl.ine i n the world ■ ttl’hVß tree l.y _ ytli-VAI, EKUti., York. Fa. rHSUMPTiON. ’ r C k.. 1 • r l, >** »boVd dlSea-** ,by lt» ** y « k.d untl <>f long ':■D t i J 1 11 'fed. -iiptrollg ia my faith ■u. ‘ fcV A: , ’ ! W(> H<»TTLE3 KKER. ■ ■'! AKI KTRKaTISB on thudiMtM ■ “ tot Fcaitbt., N«w toit. fljainndt T) t'tahl. TYLKR M. PEEPLES, Propiieg r VOL XV. EDIT(JIHAL BREVITIES, An Alderney bull gored a Mary land farmer to death. President Cleveland, it i« said was a very dull bov at school. [lie President lias made nearly 2,000 appointmehts up to date. Jvr. Blaine’s health is reported better than it has been for years 4 lie highest style now is to have tooth brushes for pet dogs. /he Liberty Bell will pass through Atlanta on the 11th of June. .Slack longue dipththeria is spending in Western Pennsv'va ria.. A negro theif was taken from jail anti lynched at Brownyilie, Tenu. The walls of several of the Brit ish w-r ships are constructed of of paper. A dean sweep is .'o be made of all the Mahoue federal office holds ers in Virginia. A reporter was tat red and tenth ered by some of the “best people” of Norwalk O. The Arizona soldiers bad a fight with Yndians and retreated with a loss of three men. A woman in Detroit, the mother of 12 children. |ttempted suicide by jumping in the river. A father shot and killed Jeff C Davis in a Pittsourg hotel for slau dering his daughter. W. W. Bolts, of Baiahndge, Ga was"compelled to decamp for se ducing his wit/s sister. E. L. Cat'eville, an old cl Szen pf Eufaula, A la., suicided. Nc sevidance for the rash act, Two negro preachers ate bring ing civi 1 rights damage suits against a Norfolk, Ya., ferry com pany. Senator Bayard is goiug VY est to enlighten the coliego boys ups on the subject of Tho ,r >as Jester son, In Springfield 111., St. .Tonn made an address in which he lauded the democrat s and denounc ed the lepublicuns. The cabinet has decided that the Piesdent has no right to ex tend the Exposition beyond the point fixed by law. The Pope is holding some of his Bishops in seen t conference, it is i believed, upon the question of i their hostility to England. _ r- An Indiana man cut his seven year old daughter's throat anp then cut his own. The mother of the child was sueing for its pos i session. Energetic efforts are being J made to crush the Apache out- I break in New Mex ; co and to pro | vent- future outbreaks. The wife of John Glenn, a farm ' er of Bedford conty, was drowned I yesterday. G enu narrowly es j caped sharing his wifes late. The mission of Secretaries Man I uing and Whitney is said to be in the interest of restoring harmony 1 in the ranks of democratic faction. Li/tle sorrel, .S'tonewall Jack son’s war horse, g t stuck in the mud on Chattahoochee today, and it took about three hour-' hard work loget him bu< without injury The Hessian fly has made its appearance in the Pacific states, where it is doing grsat damage to the growing wheat crop, Hither to it has been thought /hat the lly would not cross the the Rocky mountains. The Central.railroad of Georgia has scored another point in Caroli na. It bas secured the control of tne fvreenville and Laurens rail road a most promising enterprise, which had partly been graded. A San Francisco husband shot and killed a doctor for taking im pioper liberties with his wife. The cowhiding of a journalists by a member of the Salvatiou ar my enliven© 1 the dullness of Glov ersvill, N. Y. The Office Eoy, It was time for the office to close, but Robert Harvey the office boy, still lingered, thouge the bookkeeper hud told him he could go home. “Non don’t seem to be in any' hurry this afternoon," said the bookkeeper. ‘•Do you thiug I could see Mr. Wilton before I go z” “ H’hat is your ert ana asked the bookkeeper curiously. ‘‘f thought as i had been here a year today, he might be willing to taiso my salary.’’ “I advise you not to ask,” said the bookkeeper, shrugging his should ers. “Business is only so, so and you are fortunate not to be cut down.’’ But Robert had a special reason for prefering his request. His lit tle sister was sick ana his mother who derived some income, from making vests for a city tailor, was unable to do as much as usual, and the result was they were bard pressed for money to buy absolute necotssaries. Then again, in a week the monthly rent came due. It was but s ; x dollars, but that seemed a large sum" to Rober* and his mother. Mr. 'Wilton sat in his counting room writing when Robert entered. “What can I do, for you Robert lie asked. ’‘Mr. Wilton it is a year today since / entered your service.” The merchat began to frown, already be anticipated what was coming. He had just been figur ing up his years profit. They ex needed twenty thousand dollars, but still they were two thousand behind the profits of the previous “year. This annoyed him, for he bad confidently expected to do better. “Wuat then V he asked curtly* ‘“I thought you might be willing to pay me a little more salary.” “How much do I pay you now ? ’ “Three dollars and a half per week.” “A very fair salary these times? Robert. The fact is, business has fallen off, and 1 have nor, done as well this year by acoubte of thous and dollars as I did the last year.” “2'heu you ckn’t raise me V ask Ail Robert, in a tone of disap pointment. “Certainly uot. Most men are cutting down wages. I won’t do that, but I can’t advance you. In another year, if things are favor able, I will pay you something more. Anather year ! It was a long time to wait when money was need ed so muce. Robert felt there was no mure to be said, and he turned away slowly, his face cloud ed by sadnes-. Mr Wilton watch ed him as he went out, ar.d felt a little twinge of regret. “It wouldn’t Have cost me much to pay him a dollar a week more only fifty- two dollars, he thought ‘Still 1 must consider die priuci pie of the thing. Why should lie receive more 1 am gelling less ? Mr. Wilton migu have consider ed that to him a small diminution of his large income meant no loss of comfort, or even luxury, while with Robert it was very different. He was not a hard hearted man hut lie was disposed to take * se/t ish view of whatever afiected his own interests. The sight of pov erty and privaiou made him uncom sortable, and be therefore made it a practice of shutting his eyes and ignoring them. It slid occur to him that Robert’s family wasprob ably poor, aid he knew that three dollais and a half would not go veivlar-bnt of, “of course,” he said to himself, “it isn’t for me to worry myself Sbout bow othei people manage. I should have my hands full if I went into that busi ness,” Robert vent home slowly. He would have hurried if lie had go d news to impart, but his ap plha ion had been fruitless. At last he reached the humble dwell mg in the onlskiits of the city in which his mother aud sister lived. His mother opened the door for hum She notice d the sadnes of his look. “You failed i n your applies tiou t” she said, anxiously. OUR OWN SECTION—WE LABOR FOR ITS ADVANCEMENT LAWRENCEVILLE, GA. JUNE 9 1885. “Yes, motLer. Mr, Wilton said business was not as good as a yoar ago. and I must, wait another year. If he had only added a dol jar a week to my pay it would have almost, paid the rent," Mrs. Harvey signed. “Well,” she said, “there is no help for it, If Alice recover- her health soon, I can do more work for the tailor, but at present she takes up a great deal of my time,” “How is she, mo;her?” “She feels al.tile bet'er She has been asking for oranges, but I didn’t have a cent to snare.” “Mother" said Robert decidedly, ‘it. is veto evident that I must earn more money. Afier supper I will go out and see if I caa’t pick up a little money for extra work.” for money for extra work.” “What extra work can you find to do my son ?" “I don’t know, but I can look about.” Robert did as he proposed but returned home after two hours unsuccessful. “Never mind mother he snid “I’ll try it again tomorrow. If my employer won’t raise ray wages. I will se if in one way or another I can't make up from fifty cents to a dollar a week,” “But it will be roo hard tor you Robert.” “/’ll risk it mother.” The next day was Sa l unlay. Accordind/o custom some of the business men in the place closed tlieir stores or offices at four o’clock in tlie afternoon, to allow their clerks a li’tle space for re creation. It was in the winter season, and the boys congregated in large numbers at a poond not far from Rrobert’s home, where they had fine sport in skating. It, occur red ! o Robert that he might pick up a little money by putting on ska/es for young ladies, or inex ptrietic id skaters. By four o’clock he had earned ten cents in that way, and there seemed to be lit tle chance ot doing anything more in chat way. “Why are you not ska'ing Rob ert'?’ said Charlie Davis, as he was taking of his skates. “Because 1 have no skates.” “You may use mino while I ant gone home to supper.” “Thank you, Charlie, I shall en joy it. “I think my skates will fit you.’ “Yos, our feet are about of a size.” Most of the boys enjoyed their skating so much that they defer red going home to supper, so that Robert bud plenty of company when pn Charlie’s skates he sped swiftly over the ice. “We shan’t have skating much longer Rob,” bat'd Fred Lathrop. “It is bhgiuuing to mel “You are right. 1 think this wih be the last chauce for the present unless the weather gets colder. ’ “The ice is quite thin over on i,lie east side of the pond, but still the boys go there. l)o you see that little fellow with the sea'skin cap.” •‘Yes, what of him “It is the son of your employer, Clarence Wilton. He is an only child I believe. His parents idol ize him. T am toil.’’ “//e seems a bright little fellow. 1 never saw atiy of Wilton’s family before.” Clarence Wilton was one of the imprudent boys wlio ventured cut on the thin ice. He was rash and thoughtless, and only laughed when told he was running a risk. “I only weigh eighty pounds he said, “/ guess the ice will bear 1 me.” All at once Robert heard a loud cry, ‘ the ice is cracking ! J A crowd of excited boys and girls were looking on when the ominous sound was heard. Ail escaped in safety except one, who was farther away from the strong ice thin any other. “Clarence Wilton is in !” shout ed a dozen voices. It was quite true. The treach erous ice had given away, and the little boy after an ineffectual strug gle, bad broken through, Tbe boys looked on as if paralyzed, and appeare 1 not to know what to do. All except one. Robert bad his wit.B ahous h>m, and though he knew his own danger he started swiftly for the dangerous spot. You’ll be drowned !” exclaimed his companions. Robert uttered not a word tint kept on. He reached the dangerons chasm and iie two was ingulfed, ; but he two was ingulfed, bn/ he had grasped the little boy, and held him up so as to prevent his drowning. Bring a rail quick?’’ ho shouted. There was a rail on the ice not | far away as he knew, //alf a doz on boys seized it and pushed it tr wards the imperrilied toys. Not without a powerful effort Rober managed to pull himself ar.d Clar ' ence out of the icy waters. Both : were shivering from their terrible bath. Poor little Clarence was crying with cold. They got off the ice as quivkly as ihey could. Near the pond was a hack. “fret in Clarence said Robert, T will take yon home,” “"’here to? 1 ’ asked i lie drives, “Where do you live, Clarence ?” The little boy named the street ft ml number “Drive on as fast as you can,” said Robert, “you will be well paid.” There was great alarm at /ho house of Mr. YVil/on when the two boys arrived. Air. Wilton himsel admitted them. Robert hurriedly told the story to his employer. “-Vow,” he said, “I will get Mr. Irwin to take me home." “No,” said the merchant, “it is dangerous for you any longer to keep on your wet clotges. Y T on must come in and gc to bed, as well as Clarence, and 1 will send for the doctor.” “But my mother will be anx ious.” “I will send a messenger t o tell her where you are ” * * * * * * It was a week Robert was able to go back to his place He was moved the next day to his own house, but he had been thor- j otighly chilled, and a severe cold made it necessary for him to re main indoors. On the day of his return to work he was summoned to the merchant’s Counting loom. “How is Clarence?’’ he asked “Getting well rapidly,” answer ed Mr. IFilton. Then with a voice full of emotion he added: “We owe his life to you; how can we pay you “I am sufficiently repaid, Mr. Wilton, by the knowledge that he is doing well.” “That may be enough for you? but not for me, Do you remem ber abking to have your salary raised 1 How much increase did you expect “If you would give me a dollar a week more it would mak ime very happy.’’ Mr. Wi ten smiled. “How wi.l ten dollars a week suit yo i V he asked. “Ten dollars! It is much more than my my services are worth 1” exclaimed Robert. “Perhaps so; but 1 propose to pay you at /hat rate. You must remember /hat your service ol the other far outweighs all I can do for yon.’’ “How delighted mother will be!* said Robert, his face glowing with happiness. “That is not all. I shall to morrow deposit in the savings tank one thousand dollars to ycur credit, but I advise you to let it accumulate. When you are of age it may be of service in pro mot'.ng any business plans yon may Itave ” From til it time capricious for une changed, and ill went well with Robert. He was rapidly promoted, and became a trusted and important clerk in tne house of Mr, Wilton. He and Clarence are intimate friends, and the mer chant encourages the intimacy. He fe> Is *hat Robert’s influence over the younger boy, will bo ben eficial, and no one in his employ is so much a favorite with him as the one who started as an office boy. Go to Ahnand A Co s and get a It? finger Josh Berry giain cra dle . COUNTRY BOYS. Coun/ry lads often feel that their lt>t is a hard one ; they see the city bred youngsters on their travels and spress at the age of fourteen : veritable young gentlo meu with a finished exterior, a ci (lar and a cane. The young farmer at the same age finds himself with a hoe in his hands, and a cheap straw hat on his head, sweating among the hills of corn. He is frequently envious of his city brother, whisking past him in the cars with kid gloves, delicate wriuglets and plenty of money in lii.s pockn/. Mind your corn boy—hoe itont clean, keep steadily to the labor you have in hand, do it well, and in time iyeur good days will come too. If yon find farming is not suited to your taste or your strength, or to your oireumstances if you like mechanism bettet or have a cepaaity for business, what ever you may erentnaliy engage in, it is all the same, yon have be gun right, the city blade has be gun wrong, ana in due time you will see it. Their fathers and mothers will in the end see it, too Do not feel envious of the pleas ures t hat a hot house man enjoys but remember not in a malicious, linr in a sober spirt l , that such blanls wither early, By the time you have acquired fixed habits of in lusiry, ana ac quit ed a corresponding perfection of mind and Dody, your delicately reared coniempoary of the city begras to f.iel the debilitating -f feet of idleness aud dissipation. He is not alone to blame for want of a weak budv and a profitless mind; it is /tie result of a system; but he cannot escape from its ef fects—these he must endure for himself, in his own person. His father may be \ professional man or a merchant, or may be merely rich; /he chances are fifty against one that the sou will no/ replace hi- father. Such is the result of well set/led experience; business falls into the hands of /hose who are the most competent, it does no/ descend to heirs. It is /he country boys after a/1 who do tlie city business. Observing men have often stated thi- fact: and any one who will take a direetrry and inquire into the origin of tlx* 3 business men of Boston or New York, will find it to be so. All external circumstances are in favor of tha son or clerk suc ceeding to the trade of the eld firm? but the sol seldom, almost never dies in tic* position of part ner of the house. Why isil? simply because habitual indulgence is wanting. With all the external odds against it, the country fur nisher the cities 'with their busi ness meu. If intelligent, faithfu I and persevering and above all cheerful aud contented, the chances are that the lad with /tie hoe v il] eventually, do the business of the fatptr ol' the lad now luxuriating in his travels. LIKE OLL) TIMES. Last Friday recorded an inci dent in Monroe county, aoout four milos of Bur lies vide, that we fee! it proper to note through these columns. Mr. Newsome Sappington was nick about ten days, and his ciops began to suiter for work. This fact became known to his neigh bors, and they sent in last Friday fifteen plows, and at once Mr. Newsom’s crop was cleaned be tween tbe rising and setting of Fridays sun This is an example of neighborly generosity that de monstrates very clearly the char acur and hearts of the people of that community, Tliis act Dow evea is in thorough keeping with the record of the community heres toforc. When any one |gots sick in the settlement the neighbors promptly give all the attention ueeded. It need in any shape breaks into any household it is promptly met. We r ceommend the spirt and the practice of these people to every community in the land.—Barnesville Gazzette. Collector Crenshaw now decides that every physician who prescribes whisky will have to pay tax. JOHN T. WILSON, .In., Publisher A STRUTT CAR EPISODE “I’ve be n laughin’ most fit to kill myself all the way tip,’’ said tlie driver, doubling up over the brake handle in another paroxism as tlie reporter swung on to the front platform with the calm con fidence and krace of the possessor of a $5,000 accident inmiiuixce pol icy.. -"We pieke 1 up an old lady down hero on Grand street and al ter the condrctor had helped lwr oil and she had fixed herself in the seat a young man had given her, she pulled out an old fashioned purse, and counting oil. five pen nies, says ; “Conductor I want to get out a'. .Treat .Tones street. “All right muni,” says the con ductor, and he went, back on the tear platform and began talking to a friend. When we got up to prince street site waved her parts asol and sang out : “Conductor ain’t this Great •Tones street ?" “No mum,” says the conductor: “this is prince sleet." V\ hen we passed Bond street she jumped clean out of her seat. “Conductor” she shrieked, “this must bo Great Jones street.” “Be easy mum.” saia the con ductor with a scowl- I’ll look after you.” •‘pretty soou we did come to Great Jones street, but the con ductor was talking politics and ho didn't notice it. I made u*? my mind I’d see the fuu through, so I kept the horses going at a right smart pace. Just as we was-a-go in’ by, the old dame saw the hame on the lamp post. Did she holler? not much. Bhe just grabbed for the cord that wins- to the clock aud commenced ringing up faros at the rate of 500 a minute ’lhe coitduc/or was so paryJzed he could’nt move a hand, while I was laugliin so I couldn't have stopped it if I'd wanted to. Bimeby, a man in the corner pulled the bell and the horses stopped Then the Old lady got out and sailed tip the street, leavin the conductor etariu’ hopelessly at the clock, which registered fifty fares when we hadn’t had a dozen passeugers since we left the stables. BRIGHT BITS. A brass baud has been engaged to play regularly at a Aew York e liurcfl. Now if the minister will only preach his sermon from the tropexe the services will be com plete. Boston Globe. Those men who are anxously wailing for the office to seek them are seriously troubled by the con viction ibat the oflice has sat down to sest are has given th« search entirely.—Exchange. A piano play er should be strong fingered. A pi"k pocket should be long fingered. Tnero may be other small difierences. but /hey cannot be called to mind just now, —Binghamton Republican. The world now makes use of 68,000 milcaof of submarine cables mostlw foe the purpose of adver tißing travelling actresses and an nouncing the deaths of people no body ever heard of. —Lowell Citi zen. With pleasure Olarmsa, will we endeavor to inform you what /he difference is between spring water and spring poetry; one is run out the ground and the other is run into the ground ; that's alt—Yon kers 8 atesman, > » • • At a country dance, where pro grammes were in use for the first time, shortly afier supper a young man approached a young lady and said : “Is your programme full miss ?” “Do you want to insult me, six'?” she replied “No indeed mis. I only wanted to know if your programme was full. ‘ Well, you are not a gentleman sir, or you’d mind your business. Full! Well, I should say not. I didn’t eat anything but a small piece of Chicken and jus', a few bites of cake.” “What One Girl Did." is the title of a new story. She doubt did /be same as all other girls do —jump upon a table and frighten a poor little mouse tc death. a WIXXETT TtEll/!L D. A WIDK AWAKK OOTtS'TV NEWSPAPER. JOB PRINTING A SPECIAL FEATURE. Book work, legal blanks, letter heads, note heads, bill heads, pos ters, cards, envelops—evervthing in job printing lino done in neat and tasty s,tyle aud ou short nos tice. Brices low and work guar anteed: CalJ on us. Entered at the Pont Office at .Law feneevilM, ns second class mail mat ter. NO 13 GOT SATISFACTION. A man whose appearance does no. warrant a long discription, wer.t into the office of ttc Arkan sai paper the other day. He didn’t say, “Are yon the editor and draw a revolver, Im/ remarked ait'he stoed a green hickory club against the table: “Tilings have come to a focus.’ “Politically? v ’ asked the editor, looking at the visitor and then at the club. “You may call it politically, but 1 dou’t. YYiur course, sir. all along has been full of knots anti bumps, but / have excused all but one outrage Some time ago you said that my sou Jiu, the no torious whiskey drinker, had re„ turned from Texas. That was all right. Again you said that the chances were that my daugho ter would run away with a hair lip peddle. Smiled over that. Liter you said my wife sent a lot of butter to town, and thaZ when when she took the lid oft’ the bn rk et in a magistrate’s office, it stop ped a law situ aud made the Jus tine throw up. Even that was alt right.” “You must be mistaken, my friend, but, to humor the thing „long, how Lave I insulted you '” “In this way, sir,” —and /lie visi/ or took up his hickory cuib-—“uiy wife gave birth to an eighteen pound buy night afore last, and you have not mentioned i/. Not a line—though wo have had six girls right straight along. lam a peculiar man I don’t ask you /o stop your paper, but 1 propose to beat you until you agree to put in a notice jus/ as I tell you.” Aud the visitor grasped the club tight enough to twist off the bark. “11l cgie6,” said /he editor, tak ing up his pencil. JGpaliead with your dictation.” The nex/ number of the paper contained the following notice of the boy. Ttie senteners in brack ets were thrown in by the editor: Important NoTicE, —Mr Sottle is tne happiest man (old thunk) in the world. 11 its wife, a beautiful woman (in a horn) lias just present ed him with a magnificent boy. We do hope (that the /Ling will die) that the boy will live to be a hunyred years old, (serving half tha time In the penitentiary; and occupy the Presidential chair. 7’liis child has our most hearty congral ula/ion.” The editor hosa’t been seen at the office since the wa- published —Arkansaw Traveler And this is the sitting room of your insane asyinm, is it, doctor ? !‘Yes, madam," “Dear me 1 what a vicious look iug lutauic that is sitting over thereby the winpow. I should think you would keep her in a cell with a straight jacket on,” “She is not so dangerous as ytu say -he looks, my dear madam.” ■‘But why do you allow her the use of this room '?” ‘ Because she has no oths.i apartment in which to spend her time. She is my wife !”—Betroit Journal Mrs. Hayes the *ife of his fraud ulency H. B. Hayes, is going to start a school for the purpose of learning colored girls how to do house word. Let tier come down here and try. She’d have a large sized pic ric. But she’d commit suicide in less tha>? a week. Tn elen jears she might learn a mut ton headed negro to get np and ry a chicken so a fel'ow could have breakfast somewhere in the neigh hood cf nine o'clock, t»nt we have our doubts about, it.—Moi tezmna Recorder. A little boy in Springfield, after his customary evening prayer a night or two ago, continued, “and bless mamma and Jenny and un cle Benny,” adding, after a few moment's pause, the explana tory remark, “his name is Hopr kins.” The Confederate Soldiers’ Home at Richmond lias been formally opened aud Las successfully begun its great charitable and noble work Tie ceremonies attending the opening were profoundly inteiest. iLg, and especially beautiful feat ure of the occassion wss the tens der and and fraterna' mingling of (he blue and the gray.