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( .„7 XYKTT HERALD.
, 511SBED IVEBV TUESDAY EVENING.
SUBSOHiPTION ; RATES:
Ye»r - -
STi-ft. -. : - ■. 2
must Iks paid in
* ... Mid if not renewed promnt-
will be diseuutm
ued.
ADVERISEMENTS
.ransieiit eliaraoter will be charg
IK* 1 !", ttrst tusertien, and 50c
insertion
‘‘Srdommunieations intended for
will be cnarged for
•frtal-advertised rates.
*' “-Short ;iu d newsy eonnnuuiea
i niw from any part of the oounty so;
iH'ited
general Diretory.
ClVIh GOA KKNMEXT
ji L. Hutehins. .lodge Sop. Court.
■ [|’f Caiu, Clerk Sup. Court, >
j T Lamkin. Ordinary.
IV p, Cosby, Sheriff.
>/ K.' Brown, Treasurer.
[I. W. Andrews. lax Receiver.
j S Verner, Tux Collectorr
U.U. Maffeti, Surveyor.
j,H. Wilson, Coroner.
OOUNTV COMM ISSUIN'*Its.
J D jpeuce, Chairman and Clerk, N
llfonett .1 E Cloud. J. H llopuins, An
darner. »
BOARD or education.
T. K. Wiuu, School CounnissioDer J.
j i), Spence,. T Patillo, .d. Webb
I u, Noel, T K. Winn.
JUSTICES.
lasrenctville, 4(l7tb dist—W .C,
P., M. L, Adair, N. I*, Ist Fri-
Berkshire. 405 dist —J, W. Andrews.
JP„Ch»rles McKinney, N. P. 3rd
BroSoiitli’a,316 dist—W. 1). Simms
yp i j. 0. Hawthorn, N.P. 3rd Sat
nkf.
B»v Oieek, 1230 dist —W. .1. Haggel t
Ip. J' I'. McKlvaney, M. P Ist Sat-
Seffanoe, 404th dist —T. N.
taitli, J. P-, A G. Harris, N. P.
r j Saturday.
Buford. 55th h dis —T. C. Bur
on, J. P., I M Posey, N, P. Fri
jybefore 3rd Saturday.
MUNICIPAL-
John C. Smith, Mayor.
COUNCIL
A I. Mom -, K l» Herrin S A Townlcy
i J Bi.'wn
.laaivu iso DEPARTURE (>F TRAIN
Arrives Irmi Suwannee. 5.50 p. m
,Leaves lor Siiwanm-e, 7 a* in. ,
WiUil'i ANU UKI'A KI’URN of .vuii.s.-
■ JWfii.-As \mvex 12 m, departs
H.it., Sluiidny ami Thursday.
■ Tuhi.rs Stork.— Departs (> ain ur
liettpin. Monday and Thursday.
■ UsAiiVii.i.ii. Arrives 10 a in, de-
Mil p ru.—l»aily.
■ Tiu.o* Kivkk. Arrives 12 m., de
■ul! t a ui„W e luesday tind Saturday
I W. H. hahvky, p. m
■ CHURCH KS
I Bastist Kt v J 1, li Harrett, pastor
■miffs every .Sunday.
HUnnuDisr Uev M !> Turner Pastor
Metiers on the Ist and 2nd Sundays.
Msmd.u Schooi., -A T I’attillo, Supt
■wry Sunday at 3 p in
■ PsesBVTKHUN Itev .1 F McClelland,
Mm, Services on 2nd nd 4th Sundays
BwL month,
■ Bcsdu SeHOoi,.—T It Powell. Supt
Her; Sunday at 9.30 a nr
■ FKATKKNAI..
HUwrenckvii.i.k Masonic Lodok. —J
MSpenct W M , SA Hagood, S W,
HJ,Wiuq,.l VV. Meets on ’l'uesday
Bit on or helm e f ull moon in each
■tub
■Hr Vkrnon Chaptrr, No 29, R A
■ J 0 Spence. II P, A T Pattillo
He Meets Fuday night hetore the
Hmuluy in each month.
■SWIUNETT SUPRRIOR COURT.— N. li,
Hitfkine, Judge. Convenes on the Ist
Built; in March and September.
,Moke eye glasses
■itchell’s
I Eye Salve
■ f ' l,a 'i', Sato, effective remedy for
.iSKMueify:
Long Siglitodiiess, and Re
wring the sight of the old
Wwiear Drops. Granulation,
■ S, J®Tumors, Red Eyes. Mat
fl ted Eye Las Les, and
fl producing quick
■ relief and per
■ manenz
Hire
efficacious when us tl
WBaladies, such as Ulccrw, K,
Tumors, Burns, Rhoum
u . ? r w,| erever iiitlam mat ion
Salve jia> lie used
tt| l druggists at. 'Ha cents
■ mv',’ W ‘ Jo, i >**<>»
■ ATTORNEY at law,
Bill rir UA , LNKBV ‘LLK, ua.
IPe in this and adjoining
the Supreme Court of the
111 ■,J Jusil,e * intrusted to his rare
prompt attention.
I Jf. A, HUNT,
I IS EY AT L 'AW,
■ NORCROSN, oa.
B Su l>eri (, r ( 'nnrts
V. r<l i,ltt r> of the eonn
■
■ & ail erinrt of hoth count ies
Prompt attention given
■ 1 4,,
■ E - s. V. BRIAN!',
■ att o»»ev at law,
B . Logausville, Ga.
■ ustness entrusted to his
.«» V „ rbl Llv e prompt attention.
“‘■E'Wnel C- POE,
■ ,u,d Kr,:!.-,
■ Ma.sou.
Ga.
» 'l'.ndiust to inform the
Bi ?! ly . 'l,at he is still at
|^B*ilraiVP a " ls now preiiareil
1 »„’ r a "> ki " 'of work in
,"V W 'K !I ed in the
u| koi, h, 'l‘‘k, at.d will do
■ '‘"‘rtn.iw* iiot.ee, Satistae
e - ' ‘*mrut ting a spec
mavl3-3r\
B?|SKIPXION FF.EE \
dbw'LiT* 11 *!I'*ll 1 '* 11
broU Oil b, India*
ISF
fiß u ' -a. n
Omintuil mSfe> |jcold.
TYLER M. PEEPLES, Proprietor.
VOL XV.
THE OLD LAWRENCEVILLE
CAMP GBOUND.
SOME THINGS OF ITS EARLY HISTORY.
CHAP. 111.
Editor Herald— Among the
Preachers /hat were present at the
tirst Camp Meeting were William
-I, Parks, John W. Glenn, Jonn
Pendergrass, A Hen Turner, Jonas
than Betts aud others who/can
ned recall.
I liese attended /he first meeting
and for several meetings follow
ing. They were Apostolic Chria
tiaus and preached wi/h power.
William J. Parks was Presiding
Eider, and presided over the meet
ing with skill and ability, I/o
preached occasionally and wi/h
great accepiabili/y to his congrega
tions. He had been known by
/he people here for a number of
yens before as “Circuit, Rider’
and as a missionary to the weak
and destitute chuiches, as a zeal"
ous man of God, whose every day
‘ife gave assurance of his devotion
to the service of his Lord and
Master.
He grew day by day in the con
fidence qf the people of all classes.
Beiug a trail of great practical
good sense, of large heart, large
Crain, and unquestioned devotion
to the service ot his Mas/o*, he
soon bt came, and to his last days
was, the “Nestor” of the Georgia
Confeieuce.
ll is wisdom iu counsel and his
practical judgement soon marked
him as qualified for the highest
positions in the Church, and he
wps selected as a delegate to the
Geueial Conference bdth before
and continuously af/er. the devis.
ion of the Church in 1844.
Being bo wall known by my old
er readers, as he was also fhrou gli
out the i’tate, it is unnecessary
that I should attempt to elaborate
his charector, as a man, and as a
Christian minister, further in these
writings. His history is too well
known by all Methodists and other
Christian people in this section to
need any thing more at my hands.
John W- 6rleDn was simtliar to
Mr. Talks and yet dissimila .
At the time of which l write he
belonged to the local ranks. r«sid.
ing in the County of Jackson and
by trade was a mill-right and a
successful one and master of his
trade. In this as in everything
bis hands found to do he obeyed
the injunction of the “ JFtse Man”
and did it with his might.
Mr. Glenn was genial in his
nature and companionable in his
manners, enlivening the fireside
with his words of wisdom, and
drawing occasionally from his
large fund of anecdotes. Tueie
would sometimes crop out in his
sermons; these for the moment
would make you laugh and then
in the next minute his wonderful
appeals would make you cry.
These anecdotss were used to
illustrate some particular point
and they always interested and im
pressed me.
In one of his Sermons at the
Camp Meeting his subject was the
duty of a church to support the
ministry aud the institutions of
the church, He was pointed and
somewhat caustic in referring to
that class wno tighten ihe/r purse
strings when a call is made for
this purpose, ‘‘These," said the
preacher, “are the counterpart and
legitimate kindred of the old Meth
odist brother who got, happy at a
camp meeting just before Zhe col
lection was taken and with loud
shouting and the clapping of his
hands exclaimed .* “Glory to
God for a free t.ospel! I have
been a mtthodn-t 40 years and it
! never coat me but one qoarter of
a dollar.”
“This class I refer to,” said the
preacher, “are walking in the foots
steps of their illustrious pro lecess
or, and God pity them.
In an oilier Sermon on the hap
py manifestations of the good
spirit upon the newly converted
sinner, he illustrated the idea by
the conversion of an Indian who
knew but two words of English.
This poot Indian had all his life
been the wild child of the forest
and bud never before heard the
Gospel, under the preaching of the
Missionuy to his tribe he for the
tlist time heard of Jesue, believed
aid was powerfully converted.
Springing to his feet and raising
himself to his full bight and clap
ping his hands he ejaculated!
‘‘.Sunday Monday ! Sunday Mon
day! Sunday Monday! ’
“The sound conversion of the
Indian and the crude words of his
....
rejoicing s were as acceptable to
Hod as if Lis utterances had been
of the most eloquent English."
Mr. Gieen soot joined the Con
ference and soon rose to the high
est position in the ranks of her
preachers, and was often Presid
ing E &rr and delegate to the Gen
oral Conference.
“Old JoDiiy" Pendergrass was
also of the local ranks and he too
lived in Jaoksou. He was a saint
ly old man—tall and slender, with
a silvery voice and sols of zeal and
at times eloquent.
I have written of him at some
length elsewhere aud I will not
repeat here.
In his perorations when he wish
ed to raise a “stir’’ his wonted ex
climatious were : “O for a stir in
the camps to day!” aud the Key
note way sure to he followed by a
‘‘stir.*’ He was a blessed old
man, long gone to bis reward.
The venerable Allen Turner was
a preacher of many excentricities
both in and out of the pulpit. He
had long been a member of the
Conference and of the itenerant
ranks, out at the time of which I
write was superanua/ed I think.
He often preached upon /he sub
jec( of dress; condeming in strong
the frivoliiies of /he lash
ions, especially when these fash
ions were adopted by /he Metho
dists. If he found fault with the
‘‘frivoliiies’’ of the fashions then,
how would it be if he had lived
till these dlays!
The duty of paren/s in raising
their children was a subject he
often preached upon, e subject of
great importance we confess
Some what like his brother, Baugh,
he bad a dislike for long beards
especially among Methodists.
Then they were seldom worn ex*
cept by rowdys and biacklegs.
But occasionally a patch below
the chiu and around the throat
might be seen on a church man
and occasionally cn a Methodist.
Among these was my orother
in-law, Berry, who was a weak
man, and an inordenate, incorriga
ble Methodist. “Uncle Allen'
was preaching on the subject of
dress and in the first part of his
sermon, when Berry came down
the aisle and entered /he Altar
with his head up showing the
circle of hair around his throat.
Pausing for a moment the preach
er brought down his fore finger on
line with Berry’s throat and ex
claimed with emphasis'. “And
when you s/ave. shave!” Berry
was greatly abashed and offended
and never forgave Uncle Allen ’till
his dying day.
Old Father Betts was something
of a prodigy both in looks and
actions Ha was a good old man
and had the confidence of all who
knew him. He, no doubt had
lj6en a good singer in hia younger
days, and loved to sing at camp
meeting still but time had shatter
ed his voice which he had failed to
find out. While not the equal in
preaehiug powers to the three first
names, yet he was a useful man
and did much good within the
sphete in which he moved. He
was quite old at the time of which
I write and in a few years passed
away.
There was still another preach
et at the first meeting and at sev
eral succeeding meetings who im
press* dme as a strong, forcible
preacher and whose preaching and
personal appearance I even now
distinctly remember but whose
name I cannot recall. He was a
'ocal preacher and lived in the
county of Walton-
For a week I have cudgled mj
brain and have brought to bear
all my plans to recall names with
out success. This failure is al
most an affliction to me.
I remember vividly after this
long time one of his sermons. The
subject was "God’s love to man.”
In that sermon le made what I
suppose was a quotating but which
I have never seen in print nor
heard repeated. It was photo
graphed upon my young mind
Our Own Section —l lc Labor Dor Its Advancement.
LAWRENCEVILLE, GA. September 16 1885
[that the dim forgetfullnese of 50
yean has not obliterated. I give
it here, but perhaps improperly
rendere^.
“If all the Sea’s were made of ink,
And every stick and a pen ;
And every man und child u scribe,
Twonld drain the ooeau dry,
And yet, the love of |*.id would not
be writ,"
l Tho force, pjwer aud unci ion of
the preaching of these Apostolic
men lias rarely been equaled, and
not surpassed even in this day cf
advancement in learning and train
ing. They and their coadgntors
did more to enlighten, h umanize,
civilize and christianize the people
of North East Georgi a than any
equal nutnbir of men living or
dead. And yet, at a recent meet
ing in this jurisdiction it was at
tempted to cbaiacterize the Gospel
prs,died in their day as “an etnas
culated Gospel!” Did W. J. Parks
aud Walker 6deun and their com
peers preach an emasculated Gos
pel ? Did Andrew and Ospeis
and the P-erces, father and son,
and the Boriugs preach an •‘emas
culated” Gospel ?
Verily, it was the veri est pre
sumption of a pretender who,most
probably, did not understand/he
meaning of /lie word. W.
A DREADFUL CATASTROPHE.
The Chicago Daily News has
the following special from Hard
iusburg, Ky:
Two miles from .his, there ex
ists what is known as the natural
gas rave, from the fact that a
strong flow of natural gas has for
maDyyears past been escaping
from it. *
It is in the same belt as that of
the natural gas well at Brandens
burg, and seems to be a great nat
ural vent for a great vein or natur
al store house of this great pheus
omeuon of nature. The flow of
the gas is tremendeoua, and the
pressure so great the cave fairly
vibrates, and the loose rocks toms
ble into the seemingly bottomless
pits.
But few persons have even ven
tured into the cave. At sucli
times as the gas is almost ever
poweiiug, and to enter with a
lighted torch would be simply
suicidal. A party of tourists from
Grayson ard Jefferson counties
came hereto explore the ‘Diamond’
and “Tallow” caves, two noted
caves in this vicinity, and while
here they heard, for the first time,
of the natural gas cavo, and deter
mined to visit it,
They had scarcely entered it
with their lighted torches when
there was a terrible explosion,
which extended throuph the cave
for miles. Explosions were fol
lowed by explosions. There were
violent upheavals of the earth’s
crust and new domes or vents to
the cave were at once created,
while great masses of rock and
fragments of wha/ were .once great
trees weee strewn in all directions
The shock was felt at Clover
port, ten miles distant. The en
tire party of six or buried in the
debris of the cave, and so great
is the mass upon them that many
days must elapse before the bodies
can be removed. The names of
the unfortunate victims of the ac
cident are as follows;
John Alexander, age twenty
two, resiled at Buckeville, Ky.
J. L. Reed, age about forty-five
resided near Orleans, Ind.; Thom
as Looney, age twenty-sever, of
Jefferson couDty, Ky., R, O. Wil
lis, age thirty-six, Grayson coun
ty, Ky.; Miss Oilie A'lison, Muh
lerbuig county, Ky.
Great excitment prevails. A
large force of workmen, headed
by Colonel Horace Ncott, a lead
ing business man of ihe town, are
endeavoring to effect an entrance
into the cave, but the task seems
hopeless.
The gas is overpowering and
work is carried on with great
difficulty, ax ne lights can be
used. Citizens from Cloverport
and the surrounding country are
flocking herein great numbers.
After a man has been elected
sheriff of a Kentucky county and
has served out about six months
of his term, he begins to appreci
ate the blessing of having a stone
wall or a log house between him
and the other man—/he one he in
ends to arrest.
BREER GARDNER’S TALK
“AmStpoff Johnsing in de hall
diseavnin’?” asked the presideut,
as he rose up and winked at Srw
uel Shin to s/tr up the fire anil
ronsr out the ejder Toots out from
beciud the siove.
“\es, sab!" replied a high pitched
voice from one the back corners.
“You will please step to de fiOnt
Bioibpr Johusin has always
bragged aboi-t ‘be length of his
lieels and he now appear ad to
think that that hour Lad come
when he was to recieve a cbromo
prize. His face were a broad grin
and just a/ that moment mould
have ient Back.-lid Davis 50 cents
withou/ the least security. ‘
“Stepoff Johnsing,” said Brother
Gardnei in his deep-toned voice
‘I war in do- feedstoL de odder
night to see abou' gittin’ two- bits
wuth of meal fur my lieus, when
you walked in an wanted to git
trasted fur a ba e of hay fur your
mule.”
“An' he /rusted me sah.”
‘‘Zactly an it plased me to see
it. In few miuits de ole man
Cummins limped in. De two of
you talked about de general wick
edne-s of maukind fur a few min
is, an deu a dispute arose as to
de ai/>e of the world.
“Yes, sah. De ole man (Jura
mins doau no nuftia sab.”
“You calod him a liar.”
“But he called me a fool."
“You called him a bigot.”
“An’ he called me a humbug."
Zactly—'Zactly—l heard it all
Brudder Johnsing, an now I want
to ax you what you kuOM about
dc aige of the worldl”
“I—l—kuows as much as de
ole man Cummins.”
“How old am ds airth?”
“1 duno, sail.’'
“Oh you don’t! You an Cummins
call names an’ almost tight ober
what Deithar of you kin come widin
a miilyun miles of knwin.’ Dat’s
msnkind, zactiy. We kin be bluffed
on wbal we do know, but we wont
back water fur any libin’ man on
Avhat we doan know. When we
git a ‘heory we fight for it soone
dau fur solemn sacks. If we can’t
convince de oder party by blab we
am leady to do it slnggit’. Brud
der Johusing, it will be well fur
you to disrtckolect a few sacks. A
gill of argyment am worth a bush
el of a buse. It takes a man of
stnong common sense to admit his
faults an’ errors. You may believe
wid ail yer might am’ still be in de
wrong. Find a man who prides
himself on suckin’ to his opinyuns
an you nas found a dangerous
member of de community. You
may now set down, an we will
at/ack de reg’lar pragraume.
—Detroit Free Press.
A BABY BUTCHERED
The most horriple trageday in
the criminal of Alabama, happend
in Talladega county lasi week,
about nine miles from Talladega
City, near a little place called deck
er wood.
J. H. McGowan is a respectable
farmer with a lovely and intelli -
gent family. On Friday last he
killed and dressed a pig as his
contribution ta a neighborhood
barbaoue. The pig was killed;
clean d and hung by the legs to
the hind legs to the pole in an old
fashiond way. disemboweled and
left to cool. McGowan’s three
children, aged eleven, nine, and
four years had witnessed the op
eration.
Next day McGowen went to the
barbacue leaving his wife and
children at home. The children
were playing in the yard where the
pig hud been killed, when it ocs
curreq to them repeat the opera
tion they had witnessed the da*
before The two older children
for want of a pig agreed Ztmt tney
would make their little brother
the victim. They procured the
knife used by ibeir father and
first drew it across the throat of
the four old child, watching him
as he lay on the ground bleeding
to deatu. They then stuck a stick
the tendons of the child feel and
swung it across the same pole on
which the pig had hung. The
corpse had been already stripped
They ttien disembowled the corpse
catching the entrails in the tub,
and repeated the process of wash-
ing the body as the pig Lad been
cleaned
A bout this time the nuttier of
the children nuns out to look after
them, when her horror struck eyes
met the teriible sight of the dead
child hanging to (he pole. She
is Dan/ic grief and may die.
A coronr’s jury sutnmoud, but
it decided thst. the ehidreu were
too young to lie heled legally re
sponsible.
HINTS FOR HOUSEKEEPERS.
Tome toes ate nice with c*eatn
and sugar.
Sugar looses part of its strength
by boiling.
Figs are good boiled five min
utes and served hot.
Wet and flour well the inside of
ptfddicg bags.
Wrap fruit jars with paper to
keep out the light
Su r nr should be browned in a
dry pan for suace.
Never wash raisins; wipe them
with a dry cloth.
K eep preserves in a dry place;
seal with flout paste.
Boil coffee in a salt sack; it is
nicer than egg to settle it.
Put soda in sour fruit for pies
and they will require less sugar.
A little sulphate of potabsa add -
ed to preserves prevents ferments
tion.
After paring fruit, dfop it in
cold water to prevert it changing
color.
When sauce boils from the side
ol the pan the Hoar or corn si arch
is done.
Glaze the bottom crust of fruit
pies with white of egg and they
will not be soggy.
Always put a little soda in milk
/hat is to he boiled, as an acid is
formed by boiling.
Do not boil vinegar for pickles.
Boil the vegetables in salt water;
drain and pour the vinegar on.
Seal the juice left from canning
fruits in small boitles and keep
for making fruit pudding sauces.
For convenience in cleaning
lamp chimney,, nothing is nicer
than a small sponge attached to
the end of a stick.
A MIXED CROWD
The Austrian Empire is com
posed of quites a Lumper of differ
ent uationalit'es, among thorn
Poles, Hungarians, Bohemians
and Croats, the chrracterislic of
which are proirayed in the fol
lowing anecdote:
Four A*s/rian soldiers were
quartered over night at the house
of a peasant. In the morning
after they had resumed their inarch
the Pole said;
“Comrades, that peasant had a
very fine watch ”
“We (hold liuvtt taken it along
with us, "observed thr Hungarian
“I’ve got that watch, said tno
Bobhmian.
“Yon did have it but I’ve got it
now, remarked the, Croat, closiug
the debate. He hud already sto
len it from his comrade.—Siftings.
IA THE SPRING
The country school teacher bad
been telling her scholars about the
seasons andthier beculiarities, and
to impress theii you hful minds
with the fads, she questioned
them on /he poin/s she had given.
She had asked several question
and fiualy reached the bad boy id
the eoner.
Well, Jobuy,' she said, have
you been paying attention!”
“Yessura," he answered prompt
ly. “Im glad lo hear it Jobuy.
Now can you tell me what Iheie
is the spring.”
“Yessuin, I kib, but I Jout want
to."
“Oh, yes you Jo. Don’t be al
taid You have heard ihe other
scb< lars. Be a good bojr now and
tell us what is in Hie spring?”
“VVy—m -iii'jin there’s a frog
an a lizzard and a dead cat in it
’bat 1 didn't pat eat there It was
Ge>rgie Winters, fur I seen him
do it —Merchant Traveler.
JOHN T. WILSON, Ji ~ Publisher.
PITHY POINTS.
The swettest thing in life is the
unclouded wdlcouie of a wife.
It is more c.itmueuda'ile to ae
knowledge our faults than to boast
our merits
//ahits hava more force in form
ing onr characters than our opin
ions have.
A great deal of talent is lost to
the world for want of a little cour
age.
No great characters nre formed
in this world without suffering
and self denial.
Make the most of what God
has given you, and yon may be
happy if you will.
The company in which you will
improve most will be the least ex
pen sixe to you.
Dost thou Jove life* Then do
no: squander time; for that is the
stuff lffe is made of.
Divine confidence caL swim
upon those seas which feeble reas
on cannot fathom. ‘
Seem as you are simply comfort
able,*_don’t pretend to he tr/Tnend
uously happy.
Flowers sweeten the Air, rejoice
He eye, link us with nature an>t
innocence, und are something to
love-
RAYS OF MIRTH
It is a gin phiz that indicates
the confirmed toper.—Boston
Post.
A Frenchman likes his betroth
ed to be in her do/-age—St. Paul
/herald.
When a man gets tight on whis
key he has to take the corn-ses
quence—Boston Budget.
What the inebriate sees may
very often be described as a cir
cular saw.
The road to wealth is crowded
with the men who are turning
back.
“She’s not of my set,” said the
old hen as she chased a strange
chicken ou/ of the yard.
The temperature of a woman’s
love is materially lessened by
poverty’s refrigerator.
It seems a little strange that a
man’s face is generally the long
est when tie himself is the “short
est. ”
We often sympathise with a dog
when we think of the man who
owns it.
A man may Bee through a glass
darkly, but the xtone beer mug
knocks him out.
A dog would rather hunt his
own fleas than have a cau of in
sect powder thrown at him.
For every man killed in the war
*ei. have been sent over the gull
by the aid of the corkswrew.
It is not the man who thumps
the bar the hardest who has the
most money to pay for his drink.
This would be a better world if
the people in it who loose their
tempers would never find them-
Tnere is more magic in one
child’s innocen/ pra/de than there
is in the growl of a regiment of
pessimists.
Lo, the Poor Colorado Iddian,
ready to fight the moment Uncle
Sam shows a disposition to Chey*"
enne thing at him.
A man has a stall in a Cincin
nati market who loct both legs in
the army, What a splendid cush
ierhe would make.
A scientific journal tell how to
prevent hiccough. Another good
way is to refrain from going out
between /lie acts.
An Englishman has discoved
lhar kissing, to beScriptual, must
be between those of the same sex.
It is evident that the Bible needs
to be revised just once more.
“Yes, indeed Brown is a very
sick man.” “When was he Laken
11 ?” “Yesterday morning I was
called to a/tend him.” “Ah that
accouEtsfor it.” Aud now those
two physicians pass ’each other
as perfect strangers.
The villiage minister was away
on bis summer vacation, and the
editor of the local paper, being a
G WINNETI HERALD.
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JOB PRINTING
A SPECIAL FEATURE
Book work, legal blanks, lettei
heads, note heads, bill heads, pos«
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in job printing line done in nea
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anteed! Call on us.
Entered at the Pont Office at Law
reneevUle, as second class mail mat -
ter.
NO 28
literary man, and like all editors,
deeply religious, was conducting
the Sunday services during bis
absence. Everything went well
until, in expounding the scriptures
one morning, the editor said;
• Yes, my brethren, ev?u the hairs
of our head are numbered.” And
then everybody . smilsd, for it
sonuded so much like the editorial
“wo" aud Hie editor was bald.
“Mister! Have you any busi
ness here T”
“I haven’t jus/ now, bu/ I ex
ipect/o have.” .
“ “How’s /hat?”
“Why, I'm the coroner of the
district, aud seeing the first load
of imported watermelons enter
this town I thought I’d loiter
around where I'd oe most useful.
You mayn't notice it, but there’s
already a sme'l of reyenue iu the
air.”
“Revenue!>Goab ! I’m gouter
quit this climate. Fust i/s dipthe
ory, then its malaria, an’ now it 8
revenue.’’
WHAT SHE GOT
Mrs. Blue had sent her cook
out to do the marketing, and wheu
she returned she went down to
see what she had got, and if she
had dune her work properly.
“Well, Mary,” she inquird, “did
you get the vegetables?”
“Xesum.”
“And thu fish.*”
“Yesutn.'’
“And the melon?"
“Yesum.”
“And the groceries?”
“ Yeßsuin.”
“There wasn’t anything els for
you to get was /here?”
“Yessum?”
“I guess you must be mistaken;
thats all I told yon to get wasn’t
it?”
“Yesum.”
“Well, 11 ope to goodness yon
haven’t been buying things you
had no buisness to buy. What
els dm you get?” and the lady’s
voice had an angry quaverin i/.”
“1 got back, mum, that s all.”
The lady lookod at thet load of
stuff the girl had brought with her
and, wundred if sarcasm was in
tended, put she only smiled sweetly
—Merchant fravler.
One of the hottest days this
summer a suburban granger came
into this office and /he ejitor re
marked, in his usual original
s/yle .*
“Is this hot enough for yon’’’
“Ob, I don’t know,” was the oft
hand repl»; “there was ice at our
place this morning, when I got
up”
“No?” said the edl/or, in sur
prise, wiping off the prespiraiion
with his sleeve.
“Yes,” continued /he visitor con
fldentlj.
“Much ?”
“Not much. About five pounds
the ice man brought it.”—Mer
chant Traveler.
- - - ——• •«*» • 10m
Young Wife (to husband) —
“Don’t you no/ice a difference in
the milk, dear ?”
Young Husband—“ Yes; this is
much better than we have l>eeu
getting."
Young wife—“ Very much oet
ter. I got it of a new man. He
said he would guarantee it to be
perfectly pure, and so I concluded
l o baj enough to last a week.
He wore a full suit of black, and
a weed on his hat, and ue eyed h/s
drink with extreme disfavor.
“Why do you drink that mess?”
inquired a friend.
“Duty old man.”
“What is it?”
“Rum aud molasses,” said the
drinker.
“Since my poor aunt died I
have drunk nothing but Black
Stray, out of respect to her tnemo
ry’”
“Just one,” said the lover aa he
stood upou the step with his girl
“Just one!”
“Jurt one,” said the mother put'
ing her head out of the bedroom
window above; “well 1 guess iu
aint so late as that, but its pretty
near twelve, and you'd be going
or her father will be down.”
And the lover took his leave
with pain in heart.
- n— - ----- ■
Take your county paper.