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gjwgcrji UsCRIPTION PRICES. *1 25 ....... ......-..... •■••••••a* 1 * 4 *"" 1 75 • jtb®-..... .......... 40 Ati«» constitution, 1 yr.. 2 00 ^juiarn jrrBt m IT!AT ST i! l?E } SALE* WHITE, Editors. for Sample Copy Free I W. WEAVER & BRO. Convert Gci. __DEALERS IN aLL KINDS OF Dry goods & Notions -m n thin 0 '. Hats, Caps, Hoofs & Shoe? also Groceries such as Sugar, ** Tea, Syrup, nice, Grits Meal, Oat Meal,Tobacco, Snuff ete. We call especial attention to our line of fjCY GROCER’ES & CONFECTIGNERl’S ! I, ag canned tomatoes, peaches, pineapples, oysters, salmon, Mack gar ,hues, condensed mi.k, jelly, pickles, baking candy both fancy Hors- and I DlllS) raisins, citron, macaroni, one spoon powders, l’g broad preparation, etc., etc. Our pepper and spiees both ground and grain are the very best in the market. if* ms» A TMEALs ■ also keep a good variety of Fresh Crackers, both plain and sweet, 1 0 the celebrated, Lustro Shoe and Stove Polish. A good line of Table and Pocket cutlery, Crockery, Glass and Woodware, etc ! WE MAKE FINE CIGARS A SPECIALTY.-®* mi mono-. Short Profits and quick Sales- Terms -Strictly ,H- &. IF- WEAVER & BRO. I M- Jones & Company rner Commerce and Warehouse Sts- COTJYEBS. GA. _HEADQUARTERS FOR ALL KINDS OF General Merchandise at Bottom PrieeS. L lt * for the NEW HOME Sewing Machine. J86rWe keep all kinds of ; J6®“SEWING MACHINE NEEDLES.“issJt ^quarters For all School Books adopted by the Board of School Commissioners efthis county. MORE POPULAR TRAN EVER. The Recent Improvements Made iu The j [ ADD MUCH TO THE [Y EXCELLENT QUAL ofthis jerior Machine. - ^ =£5 an Espeial Favorite of Ladies, 'A- ■"> iSi je Tail os and Others, them for the many advantages * less over oiher Sewing Machines. 5RY WHITE MACHINE f YVarrented for 5 F. years. SMITH. J. I). <£• 7 Wholesale and Retail Dealers, MKmm I Ivoad St., Atlanta Georgia. ID. M* ALMAND, Agents, Georgia. ConyerB, larriap ' . f W JLtANGFOBB e> < riages, Wagons, Bugies, MV own make. IARRANTED TO BE FIRSUCLASS IN EVERY PARTICULAR. ep also a GOOD LINE of Western Carriages and Bug¬ gies which I sell LOW DOWN hiring of Carriages, Wigous and Bugg es Pa.n..ng and Trimmin , trades done on short notice, L KINDS OF FURNITURE REPAIRED ASGOOD AS NEW should be rememberd that My establishment is have now on hand the largest and best stock of waggons, of '' 1 ? 0 \ 11 bogies homemade ana of western baild that I have evei cartie • J int bargains had better call. All wh 1 owe me lor wot ar ®^ r y ou I need the . request to come forward and settle promptly promptly. will be moiitj u * ,1 “' ave it. These who do not pay given So you will please settle promptly. jDQUARTERS UNDERTAKERS GOODS. Iffins and CASKETS of all grades and sizes, and COFFIN HARD A ARE Everything tha is kept in a first class Undertaker. 10FFIN3 ’DELIVERED ANYWHERE IN CITY OR COUNTY . w^heevLv.ttTil r fnc P r givTsati,faction. ’ iniui 6 he d to Most Respectful'^, LANGFORD. J. Vtf. vmffis Me. sss&sagrgs EEV.J.L.TOWNEB, atme- pS& that X have "oeen /FURIflES 7 VAT r Industry, excellent Ill., ‘ k I says:— remedy consider for it W. benefited by- its a most vital forces. Mmisters A , the debilitated will and Pub °p&n find it MM a ^s e . W teef**?*®*®* Rfu^ tntl ' /e mu- and E£ve C:“- *»* Properties. oa. 2 1882 4 , . ®!)t ^C0«gcr0 Wuk l SUBSCRIPTION $1.25. Volume VI. "INDEPENDENT IN ALL THINGS-” CONYERS, GEORGIA, JUNE 1, 1883. A QUEER STORY. Dr. Hulme obtained the appointment of medical officer to the Graniwiteh Union solely and entirely because of a dastardly attempt on the part of some one to preju¬ dice his chances by means of annoynmous letters addressed to the guardians. Up to the last moment the result of the election seemed a foregone conclusion ; for his opponent, Dr. Burney, though a young practitioner, was extremely popular, and every one expected he would win easily. Dr. Hulme, on the other hand, had only recently settled in the town, and, besides being very little known, was regarded with a certain amouut of suspicion owing to a general impression that there was some mystery connected with his antecedents. But the tide of popular sympathy turned strongly in his favor when it transpired that at a critical moment he had been the subject ol a base and cowardly attack. He not only denied the-calumnious statement contained in the letters, but frankly ex¬ plained the cause of his leaving his former practice. The facts which he disclosed were not, perhaps, calculated to enhance his professional reputation, but they were certainly Ibbs damaging than the allega tions made by the annoymous eorrespon dent. In their calmer moments the guar¬ dians would, no doubt have hesitated to nominate a gentleman whose antecedents would not hear the strictest investigation; but they were so carried away by virtuous indignation, they rather incontinently elected Dr. Hulme to the post, as a sort of protest against the conduct of his traduccrs Young Dr. Burney felt rather relieved than otherwise at losing the appointment under the circumstances. Hud he been elected, Dr. Hulme’s supporters might have uttered disagreeable insinuations, and the conciousness of entire innocence rendered him indifferent to the fact that his njection by the guardians might be construed as an imputation, He was a simple minded, straightforward young fellow, and it never occured to him to suspect that his honest disclaimer had not been accepted as frankly as it was made. His eyes were first opened to the existence of a hostile feeling against him bj’ the demeanor of his rival, when he stopped him in the street to congratulate him on his success. Dr. Hulme was a grave, middle aged man, with regulsr features, weiltrimmed whiskers, and a simi-clerical aspect. His ordinary manner was blandly polite, but he responded to Dr. Burney s congratulations in a very cold tone, and made an excuse to hurry off without shaking hands with him. Dr. Burney was utterly taken a back, and the reason of Dr. Hulme’s coldness burlt upon the him like a revela tion. He began to make inquiries in the town, and soon ascertained that in certain quarters be was credited with the author¬ ship—or, at least, with a guilty knowledge —of the anonymous letters. . He would have done well, perhaps, to have waited and learned to what extent this scandal was prevalent before taking any steps, for the truth was that no one of con¬ sequence really believed in it, so that he could easily have lived it down. But he was hot-tempered and impetuous, and feel ingparticularlyin dignant at the ungenerous behavior of Dr. Hulme, he could not resist calling upon him to demand an explana tion. By ill-luck he happened to interrupt a conversation between Dr. Hulme and a certain fussy little tradesman named Blake, who was one of the Board of Guardians, and whose resentment he had already managed to incur. “My dear sir," replied Dr. Hulme, in re¬ sponse to a rati er hotly-worded challenge from the young man, “I would very much prefer to say nothing whatever about the matter. I entertain no hostile feelings, whoever the writer may be. Please under¬ stand, I don’t accuse you, and I don't ac¬ cuse any one. My attitude is entirely neu¬ tral, and I intend to maintain that attitude, as I was explaining to Mr. Blake just now." “What the deuce has Mr Blake got to do with it?” cried young Burney, turning fiercely on the little man. “Come, Dr. Burney, that’s a good un, considering that I’m a guardian, returned Mr. Blake, firing up. “I consider that Dr Hulme’s duty to society is to discover the writer and bring him to justice. I was tell¬ ing him so just as you came in." “Well, let him," retorted Dr. Burney, angrily. “I am ready to do anything I can to assist him.” “i n that ease there oughtn’t be to much d ;g; cu ity. Eh. Doctor?” observed Mr. Blake, with a mischievous glance at Dr. Hulme. “Confound you, sir! What do you mean by that?” cried the younger man “If you can't guess what I mean, it would be hopeless to attempt to explain. Dr. Bur ney,” said Mr. Blake with fine irony. Fortunately for Mr. Blake, a servant came into the room at that moment, and pa^seu between him and the young doctor, whose had reached a boiling Bat for this timely interruption, the juard an most assuredly have measured his length upon Dr. Hulme a new carpet. As it was, .tern.•“*.!»*•'• man the , table. ,, “Mr. Blake,” said the young man, eon trofing himself with an effort, and speaking with forced calmness as the servant we "‘ out, “I will not condescend to argue with you for slander afterwards. “Very well! It's a challenge, thet>, cried Mr. Blake, furious at the other’s contemptu¬ ous tone. “Nonsense! nonsense! For goodness’ sake, let there he an eDd to this!” interposed Dr. Hulme, mildly. “Call it what you please,” cried Dr. Bur¬ ney, answering Mr. Blake and ignoring Dr. Hulme’s pacific intention,“as sure as you’re standing there you shall repent of your in¬ fernal insolence.” With these angry words Dr. Burney seized his hat and hurried out of the house, hardly daring to trust himself to remain within reach of the Guardian’s insignificant person. But when a man loses his temper, he never fails to feel vexed and humiliated after¬ wards. Dr. Burney did, for he soon realized that in his position, with a wife and family dependent upon him, he could not afford to indu'ge in the luxury of thrashing a Guar dian, while he had no money to spend in law expenses. He therefore hoped that Mr. Blake would, upon reflection, take Dr. Hulme’s advice, and let the matter drop, but he soon found that he had reckoned without his host. Mr. Blake was a mischievous, vindictive little man, and having been very much aggrieved by Dr. Burney’s treatment of him, he could not resist the temptation of causing him annoyance. He was unfor¬ tunately sufficiently well off not to be fright enert by the prospect of litigation, and he therefore deliberately set to work to drive the young man to desperation. At first his proceedings were marked by a certain de¬ gree of caution, for he had not forgotten the retreat of personal chastisement. But find¬ ing Dr. Burney had apparently relinquished that part of the programme, he became bolder, and talked so Irtely of his suspicion regarding the authorship of the letters, that people began to shake their heads and to hint that perhaps there was really some truth in the suggestion. It was in vain that Dr. Burney endeavor ed to ignore the scandal, and to treat Mr. Blake’s insinuations with contempt. He bore it as long as he could, chiefly because his wife besought him to avoid inourriug expenses which they could not afford. But his patience at length gave way, and even the most cautious of his friends agreed that he was bound to take some decisive step for the sake of his professional reputation. He therefore called upon Mr. Richardson, the leading lawyer of the town, and instructed him to commence an action immediately against Mr. Blake, and to fight the matter to the bitter end. His first interview with the lawyer was by no means calculated to soothe his rutiled spirits. Mr. Richardson was a shrewd, clear-headed old country practitioner, who hunted two or three days a week in the sea¬ son. and moved in the best country society, He had amassed a large fortune, and had long ago reached that state of independence which enabled him to treat his clients in rather an offhiud way. Still, he was a . kind hearted old gentleman, and he listened to Dr. Burney's recital with sympathetic attention, but at ttie close he shook his head ominously. “It is an awkward caBe,” he remarked, andcircumstanccs are more strongly agai nst you than you seem to be aware of. Tc tell you the truth, I was talking over the matter with one of the Guardians only the other day. Do you know that the hand-writing of the letters, though disguised, bears a stiong resemblance to yours ?” “No, I have never seen one of them,” said Dr. Burney, shortly. Well, it is the case,” continued Mr. Rich¬ ardson. “Another coincidence is that all the letters bear the London postmark You went up to London a day or two before the letters came ?” “Certainly. The day before, in fact,’’ returned the young man, uneasily. - “Quite so. The letters were posted in the West end of town; some in Kensington, and some in Bayswater,” added the lawyer look¬ ing at him keenly. “I went to both of those places that day to visit some relatives," said Dr. Burney, with the readiness of innocence. “Look at that, now. Lastly, there is the fact that some of the letters—one or two of them were written on note paper of a peculiar kind, such as you use. “So I’ve heard, but there is nothing sin gular in that,” returned Dr. Barney, almost fiercely. “I bought a job lot at the Civil Service Stores in London—dark blue ribbed -about a year ago. Any one could have done the same. “True, but it is a coincidence, for the paper is certainly uncommon," said Mr. Richardson, quietly. “Upon the whole, therefore, and'eonsidering there was a direct inducement for an unsctupulous man in your position to blacken Dr Hulme's char acter at the time, it is a very nasty case to meet ... “Good gracious! I’d no idea it was so aerioagj „ exclaimed Dr. Burney, anxiously, u[ ^ yQU do£ - t believe I 8m guilty, Mr. JKchardson 7” he added, seeing the lawyer s Bje(1 fixed upon him j . *?r™;r s*-*°“\T. fcc. .1 ! and I tbink, before incurring the expense and , nsk . _ of . an action, . . ,t would i j be as ao we1 to j shape our case a ut e. *°* 1 n ™ ; a “^'oLwoumL •> worseoff than you K« therefore, take a little Burney, rising to take his leave in a very dejected frame of mind. “I place myself in your hands, but please don’t spare either trouble.or expense, for my reputation is at stake.” Dr. Burney was naturally very much upset by this interview. He had hitherto shrunk from taking legal proceedings solely on the ground of expense, without the least notion that anything more than a denial on oath would he required to estab¬ lish his innocence. He now perceived, however, that the charge which had beeD made aga’nst him was based upon evidence which he could not disprove. He quite realized that a jury might disbelieve his oath in the face o. th6 extraordinary coin¬ cidences which Mr Richardson had pointed o. t, and such a result would mean absolute ruin Under these circu instances, it was very little consolation to know that he was entirely innocent, and the sense of utter helplessness rendered the position the more tantalizing. He chafed very much at the delay suggested by Mr. Richardson, and upon receiving a letter a day or two after¬ wards from the lawyer, requesting him to call, he rushed round a, once, regardless of the pouring rain, and burst into the old gentleman’s private room unceremoniously. “Dear me I What’s the matter ?” exclaim¬ ed Mr. Richardson, looking up as he enter ed. “I came in consequence cf your letter,” said Mr, Burney. “My letter said two o’clock,” returned Mr. Richardson, rather curtly. “u—I really beg your pardon,” said the young man, plunging his hand into the pocket of iris overcoat. “I have your letter —hello t what is this ?” pulling out a black and white check muffler or scarf, with a puzzled expression. “By Jove 1 I forgot all about it.” “What is it ?" inquired the lawyer, ab¬ sently, while glancing over a letter he had been writing. “I've never worn this coat since I went up to London, the other day,” said Dr. Burney, “I had just got off an omnibus when I discovered my change was short, and in turning sharply round to speak to the conductor, I collided with a gent eman who had apparently been an inside passen¬ ger, and was making for the pavement behind me. In the collision he dropped the scarf, which I picked up ; but before I could overtake him, he had jumped into a hansom and driven off. I put the scarf iDto my pocket and forgot it till this moment." “May I look at it ?” said Mr. Richardson, with sudden interest. “It’s not worth twopence-halfpenny,” replied r.D Burney with a laugh, as he laid it on the desk. “Just my luck 1 Well, Mr. Richardson, what about my case ?” he inquired eagerly. “Look here,” remarked the lawyer ab¬ ruptly, extending the scarf towards him, on a corner of which was sewed a small piece of tape. “Why, it’s—it’s Hulme’s name !” exclaim ed Dr. Barney, in surprise. “Yes.” said the lawyer, rising rather excitedly to his feet; “it’s the strangest thing in the world. Do you know, when I saw that ecarf in your hand, it reminded me unaccountably of Hulme, and now I remem¬ ber he was wearing i —or a similar one— when I met him one morning as I was riding to the meet at Handley Cross." "That was the day I went up to town,” said Dr. Burney, “Yes; and Hulme was driving into Salis bury,” remarked Mr Richardson, his eyes fixed absently on the other’s face. “The train you traveled by started from Salisbury, didn’t it ?” “It came from there, certainly. I got in at our own station,” replied Dr Burney.. “The reason I sent for you was to suggest a theory which had occurred to me, and which I now feel convinced is correct," said Mr, Ricnardson. “1 should meDtion that I have had the curiosity to endeavor to dis cover what took Hulme to Salisbury that day.” “Why?" demanded Dr. Burney, open mouthe( j ..j thonJ , ht the matter overi and j came ^ ^ conc i Qg ; 0 n that the curious compina t ; on of circumstances which seem to impli cate y 0U cou i(l not possibly be the result of acc ident. In fact, from the first, I have sua p ec ted a conspiracy.” “On the part of Dr. Hulme?” said Dr. Borney Btarting . “Yes. I feel sure he wrote the letters himself,” said the lawyer, quietly, <*What 1 Do you think it possible a man wou | ( } deliberately blacken his own charac j er y” ejaculated Dr, Burney, aghast at this atar ti n g theory. “Look at the result, which he was no doa bt shrewed enough to foresee,” said the !awyer argamen tatively. “I believe it was a c [ ever move on the part of a desperate and nna cruDulous J scoundrel, to oust a rival and eatab h himself in business. By means of ; ^ letterg he aroused the public sympathy, obtained the appointment, and dealt a . o“, ** __ n »> T _ .... 1... m a. -* fr“-*“ "No doubt; b. t ,h. ,c„f .biob ,o« »d just now was not wortn twopence halfpenny may be the nf nn*Ptfcimr all bis elab ora e p an Rriehardson , pickL’p t how came you to the scarf in London the day, when the owner professes to have been in Salis- C. W. WHITE, Publisher. Number 11. erate intention of fixing suspicion' upon you I” ■'Good heavens! What an infernal scoundrel,” tried,Dr. Burney, starting to his feet. “Now you mention it, the person I ran against might have been Hulme dis¬ guised. I only caught a glimpse of him but I remember be wore blue spectacl s, and was about his build. He seemed to scuttle away, too; and though he must have heard my shouts, he hurridly jumped into a cab.” “Supp’sa we call upon him, and try the effect of a little bounce !” exclaimed the lawyer, slapping his thigh. “We will ra store his scarf, and see what he says. You leave everything to me, and I will endeavor to extract a confession from him.” The suggestion exactly suited the young doctot's impetuous temperament, aud half an hour later they were ushered iu to Dr. Hulme's consulting-room. The interview was a stormy one, but the upshot was that the same evening Dr. Hulme disappeared from Grantwieh The next issue of the local paper contained a full and abject apology from Mr. Blake, unreservedly with¬ drawing his accusations, he had paid £100 to the Grantwieh lnfirmeary, those being the terms upon which the doctor had con¬ sented 'o abandon ids action against him. The appointment of medical officer to the Union being again rendered vacant by Dr. Hulme’s disappearance, was unanimously eonfered upon Dr. Burney, who became the object of much popular sympathy.—Lon¬ don Truth, How He Tamed Her, Sam Brown was a quiet man, who seldom wasted words, but a determined fellow under all his meek exterior. He married Beckie Shaw, a notorious shrew, and people said they’d separate in a month—that she’d hetipeck Sam without mercy. They lived on a farm, and everything went on smooth for about a year, until it came to bog butch¬ erin’ time. Sam got all ready to have the usual party for the occassion, and just as he was sharpenin’ up the knives Beckie came out. and said : “Sam, I’m goiu’ home.” Sam protested in his quiet way, hut it was no use, so he said he'd get a man to row her across the pond. It was about half a mile over. She said : "No, ye won’t; ye’II row me over yourself 1” Sam told her he couldn’t, and Beckie fired up and said : “Then I’ll drown meself." Sam said he’d go with her if she wanted to do that, so the boat was got ready, she got in, and they rowed out till the water was twenty feet diep, Theti Sam stopped and said : “Weil, Beckie, this is a good place for ye to drown ycrself I” She didn’t open her mouth. He waited a while and then said : “Come, Beckie, I'm in a hurry to git back.” She never looked up. Sam put down the oars, caught hold of her and pitched her in. She grabbed for the boat, but he wouldn't let her get near it. When she was almost done out she said: “Sam, let me in that boat and ye’U not hear anything more from me pot o' the way,” So he pulled her in, and they went back home. She changed her clothes and entertained the guests. They’re now nearly eighty and you never eaw a happier old couple—did you ? I don’t think they ever spoke of that duckin’ since the day she Wbs goin’ to drown herself. Animals. Darwin, in his “Descent of Man,” has many kind things to say about animals. So¬ cial animals he tells us, perform many little services for each other. Horses nibble and cows lick each other. Monkeys pick from each other thorns and burrs and parasites. Wolves and some other beasts of prey hunt in packs, and aid each other in attacking their victims Pelicans fish in concert, The Hamadryas baboons turn over Btones to find insects, etc.; and, when they come to a large one, as many as can stand r mnd turn it over together and share the prize. Social animals mutually defend each other; Brehm encountered in Abyssinia a number of baboons which were crossing a valley; they were attacked by the dogs, but the old males immediately hurried down from the rocks, and wiih mouths widely opened, roared so fearluily that the dogs retreated. They were again encouraged to the attack; but by this time all the baboons had re-ascended the heights, excepttng a young one about six months old, which loudly calling for aid climed on a block of rock and was surround ed. One of the largest of the males, a true hero, came down again Torn the mountain, slowly went to the young one, coaxed him, aud triumphantly led him away, the dogs being too much astonished to mak“ an at tick. On another occasion an eagle seized a young monkey, which by clinging on to a branch, was not carried off at once. It cried loudly for help; upon which the other members of the troop, with much uproar, rushed to the rescue, eurrounded the eagle, and pulled out so many feathers that he no longer considered his prey, but how to es cape. _______ If parents could be convinced that a large proportion of the troublesome faults of childhood actually proceed from errors in 2, Z,ZZl 1SL", *». my ' ^ * 4 and brighten sluggish . , Li passion, up many a torpid mind. If this dependence of good conduct on physical well-being were fully recognized, it would also dissolve much of the criticism wb.ch we use so free our aid. @b* ®cngws ¥ttfcJg. CITY AND COUNTY ORGAN, THB LARGEST CIRCULATION, FINEST ADVERTISING MEDIUM. Advertising Bates. One eotano, on* year I00SS On* column, six mont hs. _ „ ..... M ** On* column, three month s «<a Small advertisement*, is ceuls » Special Rates to General Advertisers. ALL SORTS. Reef-formers. The coral worm—Boston Star. The Weather Beureau is the storm scenter.—Cincinnatti Drummer. If every dog bad his day, how long would a bench show last ?—New York MaiL Cheek is one of the hardest-worked busi— ness capitals in the country.—Boston Globe. \ ery lew people nowadays suffer from suggestion of the brain.—Mrs. Partington. It is stated as a fact that many people t ear best when their eyes are closed. Think of this in church.—N. Y. Advertiser. To remove paint: Sit on a freshly daubed cellar door, or wash the rosey cheeks of a sleeping beauty.—N. Y. News. Be a philosopher: but amidst all your philosophy—be still a man.—Hume. Follow this advice faithfully aud be a "hu-man.” —Boston Star. What is the simplest way to keep jelly from molding on top ?—Boarding House Keeper. Put it on the table once in a while.—Phil delphia News. Here is proof conclusive that a pig may be a fish. A tautog is a fish; an educated pig is a taught hog; ergo, the metamorphosis is apparent.—New York Advertiser. “Postponed on accont of the feather," as the timid city man said when he didn’t go through a sheep pasture with a belligerent ram holding the fort.—Cincinnati Drum¬ mer. Rev. Dr. Pusey left a personal estate of more than $80,000. All his property goes to his daughter, Miss Mary Amelia Brine. That is to say, it is all Baited down.—Bos¬ ton Transcript. “Mr. Isaacs, can you tole me vere vas the first diamond ?” “Ny Mr, Yawcobs ; vere vas it?” “Vy, Noah's Bon on der ark ; he vas a Shem of der fust vater.—Boston Commercial Bulletin. The poet said that cleanliness was next to godliness. ThiB is not to be understood to apply to all kinds of godliness represent¬ ed in the top gallery of a theatre.—Balti¬ more Every Saturday. When Carlyle said that everybody should have an aim in life he had no reference to the fair sex, He had doubtless often seen a woman trying to throw a stone at a hen. —N. Y. Advertiser. The editor of the Waco (Tex.) Sentinel, having been blown up by the explosion of a saw mill boiler, we suppose it will now be in order to allude to him as “our bighlv steam¬ ed contemporary."—Life. “Dead broke, eh ?" quiried a Boston man of a seedy looking individual, whom he Baw passing into a shop adorned with tbreo golden balls. “No-,” was the curt reply, ‘‘pawn broke.”—Burlington Free Press. A New York paper says the Brooklyn bridge is to be “opened with eclat." If any persons thought it was to be opened with an oyster knife or a crowbar they now see their error.—Norristown Herald. One of the most sanguinary puns of the season was perpetrated by the Boston Bul¬ letin, as follows: “A blooded horse is of course a good gore." After such an effort as this life appears much brighter,—N. Y, Advertiser. At Iliedsville N. C., Frank Apple, being attacked by four negro robbers, killed two of them outright and seriously injured the other two.—News item. Some people will maintain (that this is a pummel logical incident.—Yonkers Gazette. Elderly philanthropist, to small boy who s vainly striving to pull a door-bell above his head. "Let me help you, my h'ttl* man.” (Pulls the bell.) Small boy^ ‘Now you had better run, or we'll loth get a licking I”—Fliegende Blatter. Hint for liars about the weather: “I never remember anything like this season for dryness, Three mopths without any rain!". "Bah! That’s nothing 1 Now, in 1845, I remember, we didn’t have a drop of rain for eighteen months 1"—French. As a matter of fact George Washington sat down in the boat and held on to the seat when he crossed the Delaware, but such a position would not make a striking tableau, and so the hero of the terry passed into pictorial history standing.—New Orleans Picayune. One of the Boston papers, in reporting a lecture on the "corona in total eclipses,” set it np the “coroner in total eclipses,” and becausa it got the coroner just where he be¬ longed there was a disposition among tha fraternity to make a dead-set at the typo.— Yonkers Gazette. Lawyer—"You say yon made an examin¬ ation of the premises. Wbat did yon find?” Witness—“Oh, nothing of consequence; a beggarly account of empty boxes, as Shak— speare says.” Lawyer—“Never mind what Shakspeare says. He will be summoned, and can testify for himself if he knows anything about the case."— Boston Transcript, A highway woman named Annie Richie was arrested for snatching a watch from Joseph Pullen, who was walking down Greenwich street As she has heretofore been found guilty of a similar offense it is preeume d that pullin’ watches has mad* Annie ric h. Annie should change her ser.