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# » subscription prices. .*1 ?5 fat months*................ year..—-...... ............................ 75 ........... 40 Atlanta Constitution, 1 yr.. 2 00 SB® evebt rarrjAY be f. ilAl.E.^ j HALE <S WHITE, Editors. SeD d for Sample Copy Free I (’Olivers, Ga. -DEALERS IN aLL KINDS OF Dry goods & Notions ** “®a (’jothinff, Hats, Caps, Boots & Shoes also Groceries such as Sugar, OetlVf, Tea, Syrup. Grits Meal, Oat M> al, T obacco, Snuff etc. We call especial attention to our line of iNCY GRQCER’ES& CONFECTIONER!’! as canned tomatoes, peaches, pineapples, oysters, salmon, Mack #reU sardines, eondmis d mi-k, jelly, pickles, candy both fancy atui jtick, inns, raisins, citron, macaroni, one spoon baking powders, Hors fcrd’s bread preparation, etc., etc. Our pepper and spices both ground and grain are the very best in the market. am: THEM A Tumz, m also keep a good variety of Fresh Crackers, both plain and sweet, Al«o the c< Id-rated, Luatro Shoe and Si ove Polish. A good line of Table and Pocket cutlery, Crockery, Glass and Woodware. etc jwrWE make fine CIGARS A SPECIALTY,“©a Our motto : Short Pi ofits and quick Sales. Terms Strictly CASH- G W. WFA VEli <£• BRO. G- M- Jones & Company Corner Commerce and Warehouse Sts- CONYEBS- GA, ee'jp’TOM mmiM* -HEADQUARTERS’FOR ALL KINDS OF ^ General Merchandise at Bottom PriceS. WAgents for the NEW HOME Sewing Machine. fi@“We keep all kinds of jerSEWINH MACHINE NEEDLES.-^g Head quarters Fm all School Books adopted by the Board of School Commissioners of this county. MORE POPULAR THAN EVER. Tin; Recent Improvements Made in The WHITE SEWI’G MACHINE! AUD MUCH TO THu MANY EXCELLENT QUAL- S'jj IIES of this tm Superior Machine.f^tes 3S53S Ii is Espeial Favorite of Ladies, u i-iL* an Tail i s and Others. Who use them for the many advantages theyin«essover other Sswing Machines. EVERY WHITE MACHINE IfHH J| I I VV oriented for 5 years. nr - ./ /> a? r f. s ji i 4 j yy Wholesale and Retail Dealers, As#- c'l W\ m 50 Broad Si., Atlanta Georgia. T- I H P. k 1) M. ALMAXD, Agents, Conyers, Georgia. Carriage Janufactory J W JuANtWOBB » Carriages, Wagons, Bugies, MY own make. ALt WARRANTED TO BE FIRST CLASS IN EVERY PARTICULAR. I keep also a GOOD LINE of Western Carriages and Bug¬ gies which I sell LOW DOWN Repairing of Carriages, Wagons and Bug" e.- Fa.u-.ng un«l Itimmin , «H grades done on short notice. ALL KINDS OF furniture REPAIRED ASGOOD AS NEW It should bo rememberd that My establishment is SS “1 have hand the largest and best, stock of waggons, of mv own now on ' T ' curried, J Hike, - - ever bugies homemade auu ot weste P J°u want bargains had better call. All wh > owe - for wovk are ear v u I money “«stly u-quest lo come forward and settle promptly promptly. will be nee. 1 te but sho * u *t have it. These who do not pay given So yon will please settle promptly. headquarters undertakers goods. COFFINS and CASKETS of all grades and sizes, and COh FIN HAM)V\ ARE 111 tact everything tha is kept in a first class Undertaker. COFFINS DELIVERED ANYWHERE IN CITY' OK COUNTY Thanking for their very liberal patronage in the past, I soliei ‘ootiaadBce my c.ntomer* satisiaetion. U f the same, with theeverv'biig wil he done to give Most Resoectfu!'”, LANGFORD. J. Vf. _ — ------- mmtmm mm tim [■■■■in mmir i—n w—i ■ ■■■ A. combination of J?TO Bff-y mm 1 WS | toxUlc of Iron, Peruvian. a M W igiir » M m SB fs? ~ 1L i Jlark and FAosyUorustn iff/f #' M # JT mW . a palatable form*. For SW fSfM0 a i » 1 Powers it is indispensa HGBI3S Writes.— QIIQIF!F?? / J - I “ T0WNER ’ irfwSM'aMS&Sr/ ^ak a beSfltii lU iTf/QT / p U nnn S!Q E A y tedu - try - m .j"Ser remedy for it l w &SY hLUUiJ most excellent the debilitated Vital forces. sSSSfffvssM L H. t Tonic :s neces- / ---- T. ia Uable recommend it Sffi&SSS&S xgetit remedial and -Jiss ______ SI si iss dr. harter ssedicIKE CO., *• - ^3 cr® Utaekli). SUBSCRIPTION $1.25. Volume VI. “INDEPENDENT IN ALL THINGS.” CONYERS, GEORGIA, JUNE 8, 1883. MOTTO IN A WEDDING RING. A lover gave the golden ring Into the goldsmith’s hand. “Give me,’ he said, “a tender Within this golden band.” The goldsmith graved, With careful art, “Till death us part.” The wedding bells rang gladly out; The husband said: “Oh, wife, Together we shall share the grief, The happiness of life. I give to thee My band ray heart. Till death us part.” ’Twas she that lifted then his hand, (O, love that this should be!) Then on it placed the golden band, And whispered, tenderly; “Till death us join, Lo, I am thine And I am thine. “And when death jolns'we nevermore Shall know an aching heart; The bridal of that better love Death has no power to part. That troth will he Vor thee and me Eternity.” So, up the hill and down the hill Through fifty changing years, They shared each other’s happiness, They dried each other’s tears, Alas! Alas! That death’s cold dart • Huch love can part! But ODe sad day she stood alone Beside the narrow bed, She drew the ring from off her hand. And to tiie^goldsmith said: “ Oh, man, who graved With careful art, ‘Till death us part,’ “Now grave four other -words for me: •Til death ns join.’ ” He took Tho precious golden band once more, With a solemn, wistful look. Aud wrought with care, For love, not coin, “Till death us joiu.” —Exchange. WRAITH OF THE JUNCTION “It’s going to be an awful night, Ned.’’ And as she spoke the giri shivered beneath her cloak, though she strove to conceal the movement. They stood at the entrance of a wild mountain pass, beside the panting engine which was to draw a heavily laden train over fifty miles of the most dangerous road be found in the great West, The day was just endingin dismal blackness had one in which r^in bad fought with the for the mastery, and, being conquered, in its flight been sent hither and thith¬ in blinding sheets. Every torrent which its way from the heights above was madly, roaring and hissing under bridges which spanned the deep chan¬ which had been perhaps centuries in their present depths, as if angry being lashed so furiously by the tem¬ now abroad in the mountains. Ned Lester, the engineer whoqg Katie kept on at his work without look, up as he replied,— ‘Yes, ’tis rather lonely out to night. But I don't mind it. I ve seen many full bad." "I don’t know when," responded the girl for such Katy was. “I never the wind bowl so mournfully, nor the sound so madly as it does to night. 1 1 hail worry about you till I know you’re beyond the mountains.” “Worry, Katy! Why should you?” And the strong young man now paused with his lantern in his hand, and looked anxiously into the face of the girl. “You haven’t seen it—that thing—again?" Katy's eyes were at that moment turned away, and Ned, could not see the expression they wore. have,” “You will laugh at me if I say I she said ; “but I cannot help it. I don’t want to see it, indeed I don’t. It never comeB except just before something dread ful. You remember the last time was when Ben Anderson went down.” “Poor Ben!” The engineer’s face wore a cloud for an instant In spite of himself, the words of Katy sent a chill through him. He could not understand the girl. She was a strange creature. Often he had wondered for hours at some peculiar expression she let fall on occasions like this, when he drew up at the Glen to look his engine over before starting out on the perilous ride before him. “I don’t blame you, Katy,” he continued, trying to smile. “It must be unpleasant to have such things haunting one. I’ll promise yon ti. keep a sharp eye out to-night. Don’t let your heart grow lonely thinking of me. ’Twouldu’t do any good, and ’ll only make the hours pass more slowly. Now good He stood with one foot on the step. Leaning down, he felt the lips of the girl up on his own for a moment. Then she whis pered,— should “Ned, would you believe it if you see that yourself? Would it make you more careful?” There was an earnestness about her question that almost caused the young man to shrink from the touch she laid on his arm. “Whv Katy, I’m always careful, you know - I can’t bear to think of such a thing, I ef s put it away from our minds. I shall be ad right" “But would you? I must have an answer, n “Yes, then. I think I should be more cautious, would expect semething trouble some if such a thing should appear to me, “ But it won’t I'm not one of the kind they , 'we R„ t Smart is getting in a hnrrv must be off. Good night, again." r'irther moment he had mounted his fiery S steed, and pulling the lever, started i train with its precious freight of human lives out into the darkness lying ahead, while the girl went back to the little house she occupied almost alone at that lonely place as watchman for the great railroad. Two years prior to that time, her father had held the same position. In a tempest such as the one now howling abroad he had been carried away on a high bridge over which he was hastening to warn an ap¬ proaching train of danger. Since then there had been two disasters along the fifty miles which lay around the side of the mountain, and before each one of them there had come to Katy Grent the wraith of her dead fath¬ er, just as it had come now. “God grant it may mean nothing to Ned!” she said feverently, as she placed a lamp in the window, where its rays fell far along the track, dispelling the shadows, “for I love him better than all the world besidel” Ned Lester’s lace wore a determined look as he stood at his post that night, yet it was plain to see that the words of Katy had brought uneasiness to his mind. He see the wraith of old Great, the dead watchman! He remembe-ed what bad come to all those who had had the misfor¬ tune to look upon it, and could not repress a shudder. Then he threw off this emo¬ tion. “Pshaw!” he muttered, hardly above his breath. “This is all nonsense. I mnsn’t give way like this. No man on the line has the reputation of being more careful than 1 am. If Katy has seen that thing it may not mean anything to me." He looked out ahead The ronte ran along the side of the mountain which tower ed away overhead, further than the eye could reach Now and then the train thun¬ dered across long bridges which extended like threads from bank to bank of ravines almost boundless, and which it made one dizzy to look into, while on the other side nothing met the eye but darkness seemingly palpable. Turning his gaze behind, Ned saw the long train creeping along like some great serpent winding its way over a crooked track. And everywhere the wind and rain. What a storm it was! Who can wonder if the young engineer, lion-hearted though he was, wished the run were over? But he must face the night and the tempest. At a little way station apparently crowd¬ ed into a niche in the rocks, the train halted for orders. The engine, hissing like some uneasy demon, drew up slowly, and Ned leaped down for the instructions he was wont to receive here. The wind caught him the moment he was on the ground, and hurrii d him swiftly to¬ ward the rear of the train, while the rain splashed heavily upon him. Once he al¬ most lost his breath. Pulling his coat clqset about him, he battled with the storm king. Suddenly something touched him, Turn¬ ing abruptly, he caught a piece of paper which fluttered into his hand from some source unknown to him, for no one was within reach. Raising his lantern, he stared at the words written upon the sheet in clear, bold characters. They were:— “Do not pass Riverton Junction without orders. Meet extra Twelve at Landreths and take switch." “Not pass P.iverton Junction! I wonder what’s up?” soliloquized Ned, starting back toward his engine. “This is something un usual. I never took the switch at Landreth’s in my life. Wonder if Stuart knows any thing about this? ’ Pausing a moment, he then bounded back to find the conductor, stiff holding ttie slip in his band. “How is this, Stuart? Why do we take switch to-night at Landreth s? ne asked standing beside the conductor. “Take the switch at Landreth’s! You are wrong, Ned,” wag vhe startling reply. “We stop nowhere, but go through without stop, as usual. Everything has to get out of the way for us,” “But see here. 1 have orders to— Great heaven! What does this mean?” He raised his hand to show the paper which he had a moment before received. It was gonel The engineer turned pale, and trembled What was the meaning of this thing? He knew he had held the orders when he came up. Distinctly had he read the words. Yet the papei had disappeared, Might it not be that the wind had snatched it out of his grasp? Search revealed nothing. “You are dead sure, S’uart, that we don’t stop at Landreth s to-night?” “Sure?" As sure as that I stand here Read. . The conductor held up his orders, and Ned saw that he wa3 right. Without a word the astonished engineer weut back to his seat in the locomotive He seemed like one in a dream. Over and over again the question formed itself in his mind: “What does this mean ? What can it mean ?” Question as he would, no reply suggested itself. Once he thought the night operator might have made a mistake; but this idea vanished as speedily as it came; there could be no doubt about the operator s accuracy: Hai he an enemy who had taken this means of injuring him? This too, seemed far from likely; lor nowhere in the world was there any one that hated him. Beside, upon noneof these theories coold he accountfor the mysterious disappearance the of paper That was the thing which put to rout ah his fancies on the subject. Sti'l moving like a man in his sleep, Ned started out ag’in into the night Blacker than ever seemed the sky overhead, and more bounding the g nets of w„,d and rain Tn epite of the blazing headlight which did its best to dispel the gloom, the engineer could not see more tnan a hundred yards ahead, though he bent forward and peered 1 earnestly over the track, Now and men a | sharp curve would completely shut out the short view he otherwise would have bad, j and it was impossible to know what lay in the way. Ned Hope was not a superstitious man. No braver handled the iever on the line ; but the curious thing which had just hap¬ pened to him, coming so closely upon the words of warning uttered by Katy Grent, was almost enough to unsettle any man. There was so much dependent upon him ! On and on rumbled the heavy train, and Ned thought with satisfaction that every turn of the nightly drivers brought him nearer the plains beyond the mountain. Now they came shooting up to Landretli’s. Would he find extra Twelve here, as the mysterious telegram had led him to infer 7 Eagerly Ned leaned forward to catch the glare which would answer this question. He more than half expected to see it, though never before had he done so. He was be¬ ginning to believe that in spite of his hopes there was something behind this singular warning. There it was! The blaze from the extra train lying off at the switch lighted up the darkness just ahead. Almost instiuctively Ned pulled the throttle, for'Riverton Junc¬ tion lay only half a mile beyond. Then, as if half ashamed, he threw it open again and the train flew on. Just beyond Riverton Station there stretched the longest bridge on the ronte, spanning one of the deepest defiles, at the bottom'of which roared a rapid stream now thrice its usual size Often had Ned gazed iuto the depths of that chasm, and a hush came over his soul now when he thought what would be the result should an accident take place there. Ashe approached the Junction once more his hand sought the lever and again it was withdrawn. What was the matter with hitn7 He asked the question and tried to laugh. Did not the conductor say they were to go through without stop? Had not his own eyes seen the orders 7 This was only weak¬ ness. He would overcome it; and setting his teeth grimly together, the young man stood in his place, and the train swept past the station, nothing being visible but a glimmer of the lights shining through the storm, A few minutes more, and the engineer saw the long bridge in advance. At that instant something appeared on the timbers of the structure ahead. Rubbing his eyes, Ned stared out of his window at the object. A man’s form, yet it was no mortal. A weired, ghostly thing, which waved a lan¬ tern widly in its hand while it tottered along between the railst Nearer and nearer drew the train, and Ned, with his fingers glued to the lever, J tood like one struck dumb, for he knew at that moment that something awful was be tore him. The face of the wraith was that of old Grent! As the engine came abreast of the apparition, there was such a beseech¬ ing look upon the face upturned to Ned’s that he exclaimed,— “Great heaven I Bill, look at '.hat thing. The fireman leaped to Ned’s side and peered out of the cab. Nothing hut dense blackness met his gaze. The wrai h bad vanished. With pale cheeks, the engineer reversed his lever. He could not go on heedless after that. Now the train, already upon the bridge, came to a stop, and the deafning howl of the steam hurling itself down the precipice fell upon his ear. Springing down from the locomotive, the engineer groped his way out over the iridge with his lantern in his hand. He could feel the structure tremble beneath aim, and he fancied it swayed two and fro irom side to side. He clung tightly to the teams for safety, for the wind blew a hur¬ ricane, and nearly carried him away. A few paces further, and he came to a dead halt, glaring like a maniac before him. At his feet yawned an abyss a hundred feet deep. The bridge had been broken at the centre pier, and dahed into the valley below a erased and ruined mass I A Strange Case. A curious story is told of a man who is -iuffering from a deadening of the nerves. The recognition of any kind of feeling is delayed; sensation follows an act performed just a minute and four seconds after the performance. For example, should he prick iiis finger the pain would be felt just one minute aud four seconds alter the puncture. There is. no diminution or loss of sensation au J concioasness, and feeling is just as acute as if he were in a normal condition ; it is only delayed in transmission, owing to gonle organic cerebral deficency or poison , n g. There is also an absence of the mas cu ) ar tension or rigidity noticeable in well defined cases of catalepsy. To describe his ease ag one 0 f extreme nervous prostration would be incorrect. It is only a temporary inertitude, a slow communication to the brain of an action performed. The eyes, ears. nose and all the senses are similarly afficted, and acknowledge impressions ac cording to their nearness to or distance from the brain. Should the gentleman stub his toe, while walking on the street, he would travel half a block before he became con ciousofit. Should he strike his head against something, the seusation would be trans ; mitted sooner. He hears himself talk about j thirty seconds after he has uttered the words and in eating tastes his food several seconds after it is masticated and swallowed. For exsample, he eats a plate of soup, and imme diateiy after finishing itcommencee on meat, By the time be is industriously feeding on the meat he begins to taste his soup He ’ is not at all sensitive concerning his abnor- 1 the ^condition, inordinate use which of tooacco. doctors attribute to C. W. WHITE, Publisher. Number 12. The Many Things Into Which Paper is Made. A tall man, with sharp features and a thoughtful air, sat in a small study, and gazed gravely at a brown object that lay at his feet. “It is a paper railroad cross tie,” he said. The reporter raised it with some difficulty. It was of very close fibre, and so highly pol¬ ished that it resembled rosewood. Its in¬ ventor tapped it with his nail, aud said: “It doesn’t look much like paper, does u?” “It seems more like iron. Is it possible that it is made of paper?” “Oh, yes; almost anything can now be made of paper. A paper ball can be ren¬ dered so solid that nothing will indent it but a diamond tool. Car wheels are now made of paper. Its strength is astonishing. You can suspend 330 pounds from a Bank of England note and it will not part. Bath tubs, pots, plates, knives, forks, cooking stoves, printing presses, steam engines and chimneys are made of paper nowadays, and there is absolutely no limit to the uses to which it may be put.” “Have paper cross ties ever been used?’ “Not yet. The cross tie is my invention.’ “How did you happen to think of it?” “Well, I didn’t happen to think of it, ex. actly. I started out deliberately to invent a substitute for the wooden cross tie or sleeper; and I kept steadily at it nntil I was successful. I thought of paper. There are scores of mills in the country where paper, straw, prairie grass, and other fibrous sub¬ stances are converted in Btraw board. The process is simple. The straw is reduced to a pulp aud run out into hoards. These straw boards are gold all over the country as substitutes for wood. My invention util izes straw board. The cross tie is construct¬ ed of sheets or layers of paper or straw hoard, laid one upon another, cemented and compressed into molds. It makes a perfect cross tie. It is practically water and fire proof, as it is manufactured under 500 de grees of heat Atmospheric changes have no i fDct on it. It can be made as cheap as wood at the present time, and will last at least twenty-five years.—New York Sun The Altitude of Boys. The Superintendent of the Public Schools of Denver, having noticed that small boys are of assorted sizes, has tried to discover the physical causes which make one variety of small boys taller than another. Follow¬ ing the truly scientific method, he first as¬ sumed that boys born at the level of the sea would grow taller than boys born at any given height above it—or, in other words, that the height of small boys varies inversely as the elevation of their habitat. The Denver School Superintendent may be well acquainted with books, but he evi¬ dently knows very little of boys. Variation in the height of small boys is due, not to climate influence, but to fruit influence. In countries where apple trees abound small boys are tall, as in the New England States. In countries where apples are scarce and melons abundant, as in most Southern Countries, small boys are smaller than they are els 3 where. The reason is obvious. In New England the constant effort to reach up to an apple tree bough and steal a few apples stretches the small boy to his utmost height, and as this process is constantly re¬ peated, the small boy becomes elongated, or, in other words, grows tall. In the South¬ ern states the act of stealing melons re¬ quires the small boy to bow down in order to inspect and pick his melons. Consequent ly he is rarely stretched to bis full height, and, of ccurse, does not become as tall as the boys ol the apple-growing regions. Remarkable Surgical Operation. A Paris letter says that t ie young man who an operation was perf irmed for the extraction of a spoon from h s stomach has completely recovered from the effects of the hazardus operation, and is now enjoying his usual health. Interesting particulars are given of this operation, which was performed by Dr. Felizet. Iiy the use of the Faueher tube introduced through the mouth the stomach was fully cleansed prior to the nov operation, which prevented the risk of per¬ itonitis. An ineiaion was then made in the epigastric region, in order to render the coat of the stomach easily accessible, M. Felizet employed the following contrivance. To the end projf cling from the man’s mouth he fitted a spherical vessel containing ether. This he heated by submersion in water of sixty degrees temper iture. The ether vap¬ or rushing through the tube filled the stom¬ ach, which, becom-ngdistended, was brought forward to the wound effected by the oper¬ ator’s knife. The spoon was thus readily found and extracted. It measured over nine inches. 1 s had been accidentally swal owed by the man, a waiter at a cafe, in the attempt to imitate the feats of a famous sword-swai !< w. r. It is not srffi ;ie’t that we introduce the young into an aimosphere of virtue, so called. It most be also bright and clear j with happiness and energy, if it is to win young hearts. Where religion is made gloomy, virtue melancholy, and all duty tinged with the sombre hue of self-restraint, it is certain that young and joyous natures will shrink from them. Such religion is not religious; such virtue is not virtuous; it rather shows itself to be the enemy of true goodness by driving away by its repellent aspect those who might embrace it. Hap - piness is the twin-sister of right doing. To preserve their union with sacred care is the highest office of philanthropy; to divorce them is the wr-troad to degradation and mn. f«S WwMg. CITY AND COUNTY ORGAN, THE LARGEST CIRCULATION, FINEST ADVERTISING MEDIUM. Advertising Rates. One column, one year,..* On* column, six months. mot On* column, thre* months . <tf 09 8maU ahverUs*m«nU, u cent* n Una. Special Rates to General Advertisers. ALL SORTS. Thing8’worth noing—Invitations to drink. —Boston Star. Breaches of promise—Those your tailor didn't bring home.—Chicago Herald. The musician, like the cook, makes his bread out of his do.—Boston Transcript. Type-setters’ song—“We never speak as we pass ’pie.’ ’’—New York Advertiser. Why are bores like trees? Because we ove th m best when they leave,—Oil City Derrick. What did the paper weight for?—New South. Probably tor its ink,—come—Geor¬ gia Major. Could the pitcher of a base ball team be spoken of as “the power behind the thrown?" —Life. The wig is the missing link. It is neither man nor monkey, but a bare boon.—Boston Transcript. A bee often meets with reverses, hut as a rule he is successful iu the end.—Rochester Post-Express. , A man in Rochester has such a cracked voice that he rarely says anything without breaking his word.—Rochester Post Ex¬ press. A California man choked himself to death with a tape measure. The coroner’s verdict was that he died by inches.—Burlington Free Press. A new paper in New York is called the Lamb. The proprietors will probably have hard work to keep the wolf from the door, —Boston Transcript. The oldest song in existence is said to be: “We won’t go home till morning.” It evi¬ dently belongs to very early times.—Music¬ al Herald. • The Grecian authorities now exclude American pork. Greece without pork must be almost as bad as pork without greace.— Boston Transcript, Dr. Potter, of N- w York laments "the decay of enthusiasm.’’ He should watch the small boy on the morning of the circus. —Hartford Post. A genius advertised—“A sewing machine for twenty-live cents in stamps,” and his dupes did not see the point until they received a cambric needle.—The Book Keeper. A young lady being told at a recent fire to stand back or else the hose would be turned on her, replied: “Oh, I don’t care; they are stripped on both sides, anyway."-— Columbia Spectator. A good deal of comment has been bestow¬ ed upon Red Cloud and his gold mine. If the darkest cloud may have a silver lining, why shouldn't a Red Cloud have a gold, one? —Boston Transcript. Brigham Young's grave iB utterly neglect¬ ed, and his widows never visit it. They went there once to cry over his remains, but it made the ground so sloppy that they al] caught cold.—Las Vega 3 Optic. “My Watch Below" is the singular title of the last novel. The writer’s timepiece had probably, by reason of a hole in his pocket, found its way to his boot via his pant’s leg. —Pittsburgh Telrgraph. "I was so mad at George last night,” sai * a girl of her sweet hea -t. “Yes,” said her ill natured brother, "I noticed that when I looked in the parlor you were up in arms.” —Cincinnati Saturday Night. Grayling is the name of a fish; Fish is the name of the Grayling’s owner, and Fisher is the name of her skipper, who had just finished his fish when the Grayling went down to the fishes,—N. Y. Sun. An Irishman seeing a Dnde emerging from Delmonico’s the other night exclaimed: “Oi say. come down out of that—will yez, from under th’hat. Maybe ye think Oi can’t see the legs of yez a danglin’down." _ It is Slid that a young lady can never whistle in the presence of her lover. The reason is obvious. He doesn’t give her a chance. When she gets her lips in a proper position for whistling something else always oecurB.—Rochester Post-Express. Jones (a wealthy prohibitionist, who is giving a dinner to Pareber on strictly tem¬ perance principles)—“John, it is very close in here. Can’t you open something?” Parcher (witheagerness)—“Yes! that’s a good idea 1 Open a bottle.” At the bank—Cashier: “Excuse me, madam, bnt your account is rather over¬ drawn.” Mrs. Maltravers (whoso husband is off on business and has left her a check book): “Oh, Mr. Cashier! that can’t be possible. I’ve got lots of checks left yet.’ —Columbia Spectator. Lady friend—“So yin are going to grad¬ uate next month, Celia Dear me I what a time of it you must have I I suppose you are nearly fagged out.” Celia—“Oh, dear, no; mamma hires a dress maker and she does all the sewing. All I have to do is to try on, you know.” Lady friend—“Ah, yes: I see.”—Boston Transcript. inch of . wort A conic go ' is “ ’ “ cnbtc foot, ounce" 763. I his K ’ , , , . . At the commence. there was in the world 14.7,000,000 in gold, This bad diminished to Sto 00° 00 , »t>» time Amertca was dtscov re .went began '“