GENEKAL kews.
Key West is to have $150,000 hotel,
TliE cotton crop in Texas will be 1,070,
000 bales less than last year.
A hotel, costing $500,000, is to be
biiilt m New Orleans before tho Exposi¬
tion opens
Pubino the year no less than 18,086
hom esteads have been entered in Florida,
The FI >rida piue-apple is second in
jmpoatance only to tiie orange and
lemon. bushels of peach stones were
Sixty Hawthorne, Fla,, last week,
received at
ffhic hwM be planted out for a nursery.
T^E oldest man in Pike county , Ala.,
is sa id to be Thomas Grimes, of Spring
Hill. He is 106 years old.
XT is estimated, so says the Palatka
Hernld, that five hundred thousand alli
gators were killed in Florida last year.
By the census of 1880 there were in
Alabama 1,335 physicians and surgeons,
798 lawyers, 1,214 clergy-men, and 74
journalists. has been discover¬
A deposit of marl
ed on the Conecuh river, in Alabama,
■which promises to be valuable for com
pounding with other elements as a ferti¬
lizer.
Two cypress trees have recently been
cutin Sumpter county, Fla. From one
33,000 shingles were made, and from the
other 37,000 shingles and 6,100 clap¬
boards were made.
Wolves are so plentiful in the Black
Mountains of North Carolina that they
are poisoned with strychnine, and their
depredations render farming and sheep¬
raising very uncertain.
A Gum tree in Florida was fired the
other day, and the occupants summarily
evicted were a swarm of bats, followed
by flying-squirrels, screech-owls, various
other night birds, two coons and one
’opossum.
Improbable that a telegraph line will
be built from the cable of the Western
Union Company through the Everglades
to Jupiter Inlet, on the eastern coast of
Florida. A survey of the country is to
be made as early as possible.
Pensacola Commercial: The moss
crop of this State is worth more than the
cotton, and can be put on the market
with very little expense. The demand
exceeds the supply, and there is not a
county in the State in which the product
is not now going to [waste.
The dogs at the Louisville bench show
were valued at $250.000. Fortunately
for the dog raising industry, they are
exempted from taxation. The same
value in sheep would be annually taxed
about $2,500. Yerily, the dogs are hav¬
ing their day.
Leeds is spoken of as the next mining
and manufacturing town in Alabama. Its
situation is excellent, being in the bosom
of the great mineral sources, with plenty
of water power around, and a fine brac¬
ing climate. Several wideawake men
are already at work developing the place.
Mississippi has $7,000,000 a invested in
manufacturing industries, a gain of 100
per cent, in five years, and Alabama has
$5,000,000 in the iron production. The
lastSouth Carolina legislature chartered
nine new cotton factories with an aggre¬
gate capital of $1,725,000, and in three
years 275,139 spindles have been added
to the manufacturing capacity of the
Carolinas, Alabama and Georgia.
A Machine for picking cotton has.
tlie Charleston News says, been satisfac
torily tested in Sumpture, South Carolina
Its capacity is two hundred pounds pei
hour. The cost of picking the late crop
by hand was $50,000,000, or at the rate
of $7 per bale. The cost of picking by
machine will be $1 per bale. It is esti
mated that a third of the crop has been
left in the field in seasons past because of
lack of hands. The machine will remedy
this.
Montgomery Advertiser and Mail:
The number of persons who emigrated
to Texas and other portions of the YVest
and are returning home is astonishing,
On one of the north-bound trains of 1 he
M. and M. road a fe»v nights ago, eighty
of the passengers, and on another suc¬
ceeding, sixty were returning from Texas
to their former homes in Alabama and
adjoining States. Most of them were
former citizens of this State.
The original seal of the Confederate
States, which is of massive silver, is still
in the hands of an ex-Confederate sol¬
dier, who treasures it carefully. It con¬
sists of a device representing an eques¬
trian portrait of Wa-.hington (after the
Btatue which surmounts his monument
in the Capital Square at Richmond), sur¬
rounded with a wreath composed of the
principal agricultural products of the
Confederacy (cotton, tobacco, sugar¬
cane, corn, w heat), and having around it
file words. “The Confederate States of
America, Twenty-second February,
Eighteen Hundred and Sixty-two,” with
the following motto: “Deo Vindice.”—
The Confederate monument at Magnolia
Cemetery to the memory of the dead
Who fell in defense of Charleston hears
on one of its faces an enlarged represen¬
tation of the great seal of the Confede¬
rate States.
THE WEEKLY.
VI.
EDITOHIaL aOTES.
Germany has 500 mills for the manu
facture of wood pulp. Such a degree of
perfection has been attained in the treat¬
ment that even for the better qualities
ot paper the wood pulp is substituted
for pulp made from rags. It const! lutes
io per cent of the paper stock used
throughout Germany.
The Methodist Episcopal Mission at
New York, appropriated $15,482 for mis¬
sionary work in Bulgaria and Turkey,
$34,000 for Mexico, -and $35,648 for Ja¬
pan. The total appropriations for for¬
eign mi-sions is $370,898. The appro¬
priations for domestic missions are •
Arizona, Dakota $8,000 ; Black Hills, $3,600,’
and $13,525.
Large fortunes are rare in Switzerland
and the salaries . of public functionaries
are very modest. The president of the
confederation receives for Lis services
only $3,000 a year: few judges receive
more than $l,2o0, and there is probably
no bank manager m he country with a
salary of more than twice that amount,
A man with an income of $2,500 is con
sidered very well off indeed, and to have
$5,000 a year is to be “passing ricii.”
General Wright, chief of enginees,
wants in the next fiscal year $36,730,485,
wo*
undertlie direet , ion of tlle Mississipp
rivel . commission. He proposes to ex
pend | 90 000 i n Charleston harbor,
$I35 000 m fte Savannan river> and
$20,000 in Cumberland sound. The es¬
timates for the Atlantic cost are for car¬
rying on operations on 145 of the 151
improvements in progress. They pro¬
vide for the completion within the com¬
ing fiseal year of 75 of them.
While the men and boys of America
were drinking eight gallons apiece of
beer and whiskey last year they did not
exhaust the stock of the manufacturers
in this country. They exported over
5,000,000 gallons of spirits and supplied
Europe with 235,000,000 pounds of to¬
bacco. The tobacco went almost entirely
to England, France and Germany, while
the liquor found its way over almost the
entire area of the civilized world. In
spite of the fact that we used 75,000,000
gallons „ of x- our own wlnskey m • xi J.e „ _„„i. past
yeaf, there were imported 8,000,000 gal
Ions of spirits of various sorts, which,
by the way, is more than we exported in
the year.' It is proper to add, that the
internal revenue tax collected upon this
whisky, beer and tebacco during the
past fiscal year was $140,000,000. and
that the internal revenue system, since
its inception in 1863, has brought into
the treasury a total of $3,087,376,125,05.
An adroit reasoner once wrote an essay
on tea as a cause of cri ice in which he
contended that this mild beverage wrick
edmore nerves and ruined more consti
tutions than all the various forms of
alcohol combined. The consumption of
tea is increasing rapidly and tea drinking
is becoming more and more of a social
custome in England and America Sugar
is going out of favor at fashionable Ame
rican tea parties, and cream is losing
ground. The French drink their tea
very sweet and help themselves to sugar
with their fingers. The Russians, who
set many of our social customs for us,
prefer lemon with both hot and cold tea
and seldom use sugar. The luxurj of
tea drinking is said to be offered in its
most tempting form in Russia. Their
best brand costs ten dollars a pound aid
its proper preparation for the table is one
of the national fine arts.
Some startling facts are disclosed in
the report of the commissioners of
internal revenue. Last year the tobacco
factories in this country used 11,653,339
pounds of licorice in fixing their goods
for the market. Besides this they used
11,257,100 pounds of sugar to make the
stuff taste good. The total amount of
tobacco manufactured in the United
States last year was 110,000,000 pounds.
So that it is fair to conclude that ten per
cent, of the tobacco chewed by free
American citilens, is licorice and another
ten per cent, sugar. New Jersey takes
the lead in the manufacture of tobacco,
with Missouri a close second. North
Carolina third, and New Y’ork fourth.
In the manufacture of cigars New York
leads the list, having 3,893 factories and
making a miilion cigars a year, The to¬
bacco factories and importers supply for
every male person in the country ten
pounds of chewing tobacco, three and a
half pounds of smoking tobacco, two
CONYERS, GA.. NOVEMBER 23. 1883.
hundred and fifty cigars, and half a
pound of snuff. The whiskey showing
is still worse. Every male person in the
country cohUI have had six gallons a
piece last year if the quantity cconsum
ed had been ebually divided, while there
was enough malt liquor destroyed to
furnish every man, woman and child
with ten gallons each, The delightful
luxuries, while they regaled the Ameri¬
can voter, paid the treasury $140,000,000.
When fertilizers fail it is customary to
blame the manufacturers, without stop¬
ping to think that no manufacturer can
make a fertililer that will suit all soils.
No two farms are alike in their wants.
Then, too, the season may be adverse to
the manner in which the fertilizer is put
in the sol The Petersburg Index
Appeal says the chief reason is found in
the failure of tho farmers “to supply
their lands with that quantity of organic
matter which they alwavs need, and
without which no stimulant is ot much
value. All soil requires more or less of
organic matter (humus,) and if this is
insuflk-ent for the requirements of crops,
xk e fertilizer remains comparatively
inert. All must have noticed that ferti¬
lizers act best on soils rich in vegitable
mould. The fact ought to supply the
farmer with a valuable hint, Organic
material is the basis of fertility, and all
land should be liberally fed with it.—
<» such soil, andon
noother -
LATER NEWS.
Immense rlamagcvfas been done by a tor¬
nado in Oxford, Franklin and other counties
of Maine. Millions of trees were blown down,
many houses and barns des'royed, churches
unroofed and railroad bridges moved from
their foundations. The Fuses aggregate hun¬
dreds of thousands of dollars.
The sum of §150,000 has been raised by sub.
scription for the purpose of estab’isliing a
general Unitarian headquarters in Boston
and immediate steps will be taken to purchase
an eligible sight and erect a suitable building.
At the Prospect Fair grounds, Brooklyn
the bay gelding Frank, with running mate,
trotted a mile in 2)0834, thus beating 2:10J£
the best record, which was made by Maud 8.
without mate.
John VV affix, of Cleveland, bet a dollar
that he could drink fifteen glasses of whiskj
in fifteen minutes, and won the wager, ba*
lost his life.
Trinity cathedral, one of the most iuipos
m? Episcopal buildings in the country was
consecrated at Omaha, Neb., by the founder,
Bfchop clarkS0U) assistel by Lord Bishop
s weetraan 0 f Toronto, Bishop Garrett, of
,
Texas, and other clergymen.
The National league, for the suppression
of polygamy, in session at Cleveland, adopted
an address to the country denouncing Mor¬
mon practices and urgently requesting “tluq
petitions be circulated in every city, town
and school district in the United States, ask¬
ing Congress to submit to the legislatures of
the various States an amendment to the con¬
stitution prohibiting polygamy.”
During the recent heavy storm the barge
•Milwaukee wasdost with her crew of seven
men in Lake Ontario.
The annual report of General Merritt, su.
perintendent of the West Point Mi-ltary
academy, says that on September 1, 1883,
there were at the aa lerny fifty-five pro¬
fessors and commissioned officers and 311
cadets. There were no deaths during the
year among the cadets, officers or soldiers,
The average cost of subsisting each cadet
are goo(b altho „ gh the practice of hazing hai
n ot yet been entiiely broken up.
Gold in prying qu mtities has been found
j n the province of Quebec.
Senor Juan Valera, a distinguished
pP' d ” a f “ al ’ n °’f be fc en a a n ^ )0 S™d succeTsorto^he
^ g no r Barca> who kille 1 himself in New
York, as Spain's diplomatic representative in
he United States.
Furs.— An importer and exporter of
furs gives this information: “The house
cat is one of the most valuable of fur¬
bearing animals, and when they mys¬
teriously disappear from the back fence
they often find their way to the furrier.
It is an actual fact that in 1882 over
1,200,000 house cats were used by the
fur trade. Black, white, maltese and
tortoise-shell skins are most in demand.
They are made into linings and used in
philosophical apparatus. As for skunks,
350,000 were used in this country last
season, valued from fifty cents te $1.20.
They come from Ohio and New York
principally, and, as in pursuit of the
tiger and lion, the bravest men are re¬
quired.’’
Dropped Out. —It appears by a lecture
of Mr. Laughton, delivered at Greenwich
recently, that the old Royal George,
whose sudden careening, just as she was
ready to start on a cruise with hundreds
of men on board, has been the subject of
verse and romance, really went down
because she was rotten, and the unusual
weight in her hold caused her bottom to
drop out, on which she filled and sank
One ungrateful man does an injury to
all who stand in need of aid.
Fools will otten mane success where
prudent people fail.
IMPORTANT TIME CHANGE
Changes in tlic Time by which *he
Uailroads oft tiie Country are
Hun.
The changes made on Sunday, November 18,
in the tune by which about all the railroads in
the country are run, cannot be brought about,
at the best, without considerable friction,
says the Scientific American. In Boston, for
instance, there is no little opposition to the
putting of clocks and watches back some
seventeen minutes, as will be necessary under
the new provision for “Eastern standard”
time, but orders have been issued for many of
the pi b ic clocks in that city to be so regu¬
lated, and, as the whole railroad system of
the Eastern States will be controlled by
this standard, tho prevailing opinion seems
to be that the innovation will ba generally will
accepted. There may 1)6 some -who at
first carry the two kinds of time, the “stand¬
ard” and the true, as can bo rea !i y done by
having two minute hands on a watch; this is
now ire ment'y pract ce 1 to keep both New
York and Boston time, by those who travel
much between the two cities. In ISew Yo<k
citv whi-ra the change required calls for
putting back the prebibly true time be !e;s only opposition four^ min¬ to
utes. there will
the a motion of tiie new standard, but confusion it may
b> readily conceived that great is at
will inevitably be caused wherever it
tempte l to use the two kinds of time simul-
1 ft T> 11 go Vi sly. adoption of the plan there will
v the new
practio illy be onlv four standards of time
throughout the country, instead of forty
nine as at pres n'. Tiie time-tables of many
of tiie railroads will also order have to to facilitate be change:!, tile
as well as the clocks, in between lines affected
making of connections
over < on-iderabie distances east and west.
The following list of changes lias, therefore,
boen furnished by Mr. W. E. Allen, secretary
of the railroad conventions which decided
upon the adoption of tiie new standard, the
letter t denoting that the clock is to be set
anead, and the letter s that it is to be set
Atchison, Topeka, and Santa Fe, east of
Dodge City, clocks only. D minutes, f.
Atchison, Topeka, and Santa Fe, west of
Dodge City, clocks and schedules, 51 minutes.
Baltimore and Ohio (west), both clocks and
schedules, 28 minutes, Tunnel s. and Western, both
Boston Hoosac
clocks and schedules, 4 minutes, s. 10 min
Boston and Albany, clocks only
U division), clocks
Canadian Pacific (Eastern
only, 0 minutes, s. Hudson Canal Company,
Delaware and
clocks only, 4 minutes, s. and Western, both
Delaware, Lackawanna,
clocks an 1 schedules, 4 minutes, s. Louisville,
Fort Wayne, Cincinnati, and
both clocks and s: heluies, 23 minutes, s.
Freehold and New York, both clocks and
schedules, 4 minutes, Connecticut s. Western, clocks
Hartford and
only, 4 minutes, Shore and s. Michigan Southern, both
Lake
clocks and schedules, 28 minutes, s.
Lehigh Valley, clocks only, 1 minute, f.
Louisville and Nashville, clocks only 18
minute=, s. Pacific, clocks, schedules at St.
Missouri
Louis only, 8 minutes, Erie, s. and Western, clocks
New York, Lake
onlqq 4 minutes, s.
(New York Central and Hudson River,
clocks only, York 4 City minutes, and Northern, s. clocks only,
New
4 minutes, s.
New York and New England (east of 14 Con¬ min¬
necticut), both clocks and cchedu es,
utes, s.
New York and New England (in Connecti¬
cut), both clocks and schsdu’es, 4 minutes, s.
Pennsyrvan a. New York division, both
clocks and schedules, 1 minute, f.
Pennsylvania, all divisions except New
Yo:k. c ooks only, and 1 minute, Reading, f. both clocks
Philadelphia minute, f.
and schedule -, 1
Rome, Watertown, and Ogdensburg,
clocks only, 4 minutes, s.
Gambling Legally Defined.
The Supreme Court of Michigan holds
pools selling on games of base ball to be
gambling within the meaning of the
statutes of that State against keeping
gaming rooms. The fact that the games
upon which the wagers are laid do not
take place in the room, but at a distance,
is unimportant. of billiards
“Betting upon played a game in New York,”
which is being readily be
says Judge Cooley, “can as in the
carried on in a distant city as, very and
room where the playing is going on;
if the latter is a gaming room so must
the other be.”
The court considers it to he gaming al¬ or
gambling to bet upon any game,
though the game may be perfectly between inno¬
cent and there may be no wager
the players themelves. Betting is thus
equivalent to gambling whenever the
bet is to be determined by the result of
a game, but there may be betting which
is not gaming, as for example, in the
case of an election wager. Horse races,
however, as well as dog fights, foot races
and cock fights have been held to be
games within the terms of the English the
statute on the subject, passed in basis
time of Queen Anne, which is the
of much of the American legislation.
Pensions. —In the United States the
average value of a pension is about §105.
The average date when arrears begin to
accrue is 1864. The number of unset¬
tled claims now pending which involve
arrears is 148,813. In addition, 95,692
claims are pending which will not in¬
volve arrears, The present annual
charge for pensions is $32,0110,0( 0. If
half the pending claims are allowed,
this will be increased to $84,836,565. If
no further claims are received, the an¬
nual charge will of course diminish
slowly at present, but very rapidly in a
few yeafs.
A Guy Hooter.— Mr. Edwin Booth,
when told that a “guy hooter” was a
regular attacliee of a girl’s baseball nine,
and was hired to make boisterously
funny remarks in order to excite the
crowd to laughter, said that it was a
i good idea for the comedians. “Put a
I good infectious laughter into an audi
I ence,” said he, “and it would he a tre¬
mendous help to a tarcial performance.’ 1
NUMBER 35.
THE JOKER'S BUDGET.
WHAT WE FIND IN THE HUMOROUS
PAPERS.
SHE GOT IT.
“’There,” called out a woman who was
a passenger on a Bay City train leaving
Detroit a day or two ago. “I’ve went
and gone and left my satchel in the
depot! Somebody call the conductor !”
A benevolent man with a bald head
and a double chin volunteered bis ser¬
vices, and after a time the conductor was
brought in.
“Can’t you stop and run back ?” asked
the woman.
“No, ma’am, but I’ll telegraph to
have your baggage sent on. What is
it?”
“A satchel.”
“Very well,” he said as he began to
write. “It’s an old satchel with one
handle off, and the lock broken, of
cottrce. ”
“Y-yes, sir; but it’s none of your
business if it is. You don’t buy my
satchels!”
“No, ma’am—of course not. Let’s
see! I’ll telegraph them night-cap.” to open it. The
first thing on top is a
“S’posin’ ’tis !” law she agin blustered wearing up. night¬ “I
guess there is no
caps !”
t * No, ma’am; and the next thing is a
pair of black woolen stockings which
have been darned in the heels. What
next ?”
‘ ‘The next thing is that if any man in
this ’ere State of Michigan dares to open
that satchel and go to pawing over tho
contents I’ll make a corpse of him !” she
exclaimed, as she untied her bonnet,
“But I must telegraph.”
“Then you call it a black satchel kind¬
er busted in on one side and kinder
busted all to Goshen by you railroad
wretches on both ends, and let it go at
that! I won’t have it pawed over.”
“But, madam, you—”
“Not another word,” she said, as her
spectacles danced on her nose. Do as
I tell you, and if they can’t find it I’ll
come back and stir things up and bounce
folks around till they’ll think it’s a bad
year for burrieanes. Just say a busted
black satchel, and add that if it comes
along with the other handle pulled off
I’ll begin a lawsuit to make this railroad
flicker!"
The busted black satchel left on the
next train .—Detroit Free Press.
ON THE WRONG BACK.
An invalid gentleman and his wife had
engaged a berth in a Pullman car on a
certain railway. Toward midnight the
patient awoke with a severe pain in his
back, and asked his wife to possible. apply a mus¬ His
tard plaster as quickly as plaster ready
better half at cnce got the
and then ran to the other end of the car¬
riage to warm it at the lamp and make
it draw all the better. Returning to her
sick husband the little woman unfortu¬
nately went to the wrong bed, which hap¬
pened to lie occupied by a stout German
wine merchant , who, was fast asleep. She
quickly drew the curtain, lifted the bed¬
clothes, and in a twinkle clapped the
plaster on the traveler’s back, At that
moment the sick husband called out
from the berth: “Mary, what a long
time vou are !” Now the poor woman
first became aware of her terrible mis¬
take. Hurrying to ber husband she told
him in a whisper of what she had done.
The poor sufferer could not help laugh¬
ing in spite of his pain, and lie laughed
until his pain had left him. Then all
was still for awhile, until suddenly loud
cries and imprecations were heard pro¬
ceeding from the wine traveler. “Herr
gotsmiilionendonnerwetter ! What is it
that I have got on my back ? Himmel
mel-bombemgranaten - elements-donner
nnd Hagslwettei! Whew, how it burns!
Water! Fire ! Ah ! Oh! my back !
The bed is on fire ! Thunder and light¬
ning ! Water! my back!” We draw
a veil over the rest of the story .—Port
Jervis Union.
PLANTATION PHILOSOPHY.
De reason dat we thinks dat our mud
ders could beat anybody cookin’ is be¬
cause we kain’t carry de boy’s appertite
inter ole age. When my wife says
“Doan yer think yer’d better do so an
so,” I commences ter argy wid her, but
when she says, “Go an’ do so an’so,” I
hus’les den an’ dar. I knowed one man
what was so good dat he wouldn’t pull a
steer outen de ditch on Sunday. He
was arterward sont ter de penitentiary fur
stealing a horse on Tuesday. De baby
is more ap’ ter die den de man; de little
apple is more ap’ ter fall den de well
grone one; de ole man is more ap’ ter
die den de young man, fur de ripe apple
is al’ers ready ter drap. It is a mighty
good thing ter be ’dustrious, but too
much stirrin’ ’ronn’ ain’t good fur seed yer. by
De pateridge is more ap’ ter be den when
de hawk when he’s flyin’ ’bout
lie’s restin’ under de bush. Once a man
tole me dat he didn’t want de office wliat
he had been nominated fur, an’ dat he
wnn’t agwiiie ter ax no man ter vote fur
him, but when he foun’ dat I had voted
agin him he come aroun’ an’ raised a
row wid me. Now, when a canerdate
tells me det he doan want de office, I
may not say mi thin’, but I has a mighty
stron ’spiciondat he’s a bar .—Arkansaw
Traveler.
THE RIGHT OF CONQUEST.
“Why do you make such a face in tak¬
ing medicine?” asked a wife of her hus¬
band. “You pour it down Tommy.”
“Yes, because I am stronger than
Tommy. If Tommy were stronger th
pour it down me.”
=—rl rla
THE FARMER AND THE TELEPHONE.
The Saginaw (Mich.) into Courier says:—
A; farmer stepped wanted a grocery sell
house here and to a
load of apples. The buyer for the firm
was at the telephone, and the financial
man told the farmer to wait a moment,
and as the buyer turned from the tele¬
phone the man of cash, who was busy, and
attracted his attention by a nudge,
pointed to the apples. He went out
with the farmer and asked him what his
apples were worth. The farmer pulled went
down into his pocket, and out a
dollar, and pointed to the bushel basket
on the load. The buyer said, “That’s too
much. I’ll give you 75 cents. ” The
farmer shook his head and flourished
the dollar. He was told it was too
much, and that he must take something
less. He took out a scrap of paper and
wrote 85 cents and $1, and then by mo¬
tions indicated that he would take 85
cents for one lot and $1 for the others.
The buyer said, “All right, but why
don’t you talk ?” The farmer found his
tongue, and replied: “ Why, ain’t you
deaf?” “ Not that anybody knows of.”
“ What did you have that tube to your
ear then for ?” and the man from the
rural districts learned about the tele¬
phone.
ONE OP LINCOLN S STORIES.
Secretary Lincoln lias enough of hia
father’s nature to enable him to make
good stories and to tell them well. When
he was in Chicago with Arthur he, with
a number of other gentlemen, was en¬
joying an after-dinner chat, when be told
this story, illustrative of the craze in
Chicago for entering the plea of self
defense : Three men quarreled in a room
above a saloon, when one of them fell
dead from heart disease. Tho others
were fearful that .they would be charged
with murder, so one went to the saloon
and enticed tho bartender out, while tlia
other carried the corpse down and placed
it in a chair with its head on a table as
if tender sleeping off a drunk. When the bar¬
returned the two men took a
drink, saying the drunken man in the
cliair would pay for it, and went away.
The bartender soon shook his customer
and demanded his pay. The corpse fell
over on the floor, and as the bartender
stood trembling with fear, the two men
returned with an officer. The bartender,
anticipating his arrest, quickly said,
“ He struck me first.”
SUPPOSING A CASE.
It was an ingenious witness that turned
the laugh upon the genial County At¬
torney of Androscoggin County, Maine,
at court recently. The case was the
Philip Atkins case.
“Now, sir,” said the County Attorney, would
holding up a gold chain, “what
you have thought if you had seen such a
chain as that around the respondent’s
neck ?”
“Well, I can’t say. I didn’t see any
such chain.”
“Well, if yon had?”
“I can’t say; never see any such chain
on Atkins’s neck.”
“Yes,” replied the Attorney; “but let
us suppose a case. Suppose, for in¬
stance, that you had seen this chain
around Philip Atkins’s neck; what
would you have thought, knowing At
nins, as yon do ?”
The court-room was very quiet. Tho
witness drawled perceptibly as he re¬
plied:
“Well, I suppose if I had seen it, I
should have thought that he had a gold
chain around his neck.”
The Judge relasped, and the audience
exploded, and the prosecution lost tho
point .—Lewiston Journal.
Domestic Recipes.
A delicious way to prepare baked
apples for tea is to cut out the core be¬
fore baking. When ready to send to
the table fill the space left in the apple
with sweet cream with a little powdered
sugar iu it. Quinces are also excellent
prepared in the same way. In these
butter may take the place of cream if
more convenient.
A delicious hot sauce for puddings is
made of six tablespoonfuls of sugar, two
of butter, and one egg; beat the butter,
sugar, and the yolk of the egg together,
then add the white beaten to a froth;
lastly stir in a teacupful of boiling wa¬
ter and a teaspoonful of vanilla.
One way to economize and to produce
excellent results in cooking is to use suet
in place of butter or lard. For many
purposes it is better than either of these.
Some people who object decidedly to
cakes fried in lard relish them when snet
is used for frying. Beef balls are very
nice fried in suet. Round steak can be
used for these. Chop the meat fine, sea¬
son well with pepper and salt and any
herb you may choose, shape them like
flat balls with your hands, dip in egg and
fine cracker or bread crumbs, and fry in
the hot suet.
Fried Tomatoes.— Have ready over
the fire a frying-kettle half full of fat, or
a large frying-pan containing butter
enough to cover the bottom to the depth
of an inch; peel half a dozen firm toma¬
toes of medium size, and cut them in
slices about quarter of an inch thick;
put into a howl quarter of a pound of
Hour, half level teaspoonful of salt,
quarter of a saltspoonful of pepper, the
yolk of one raw egg, a teaspoonful of
salad oil or melted butter, and sufficient
cold water to make a batter thick enough
to hold a drop from the mixing spoon
for an instant on its surface; beat the
white of the egg to a stiff froth and mix
it lightly into the batter; when the fat
is smoking hot put dip the them slices into of the tomato hot
into the batter,
fat, and quickly fry them brown; when
they are brown take them from the fat
with a skimmer, lay them for a moment
on brown paper to free them from
grease, and then serve them hot.
It Was There.
Judge David Davis was once making
a deposit at a Washington bank and
stood counting a large pile of money at
a desk. A well-dressed young man.
stepped up and, with a bow and a smile,
said: “Judge, you have dropped a bill.”
Sure enough there lay a clean, crisp,
genuine two-dollar Dili at the depositor's
feet. “Thank you,” his blandly answered
the judge, placing bill ponderous right
boot over the on the floor and calmly
resuming his counting. The sharper,
taken aback by the coolness of the pro¬
ceeding, disappeared and the judge was
$2 ahead by the transaction.
