Below is the OCR text representation for this newspapers page.

THE CONYERS WEEKLY VOL. XI. It is estimated that $250,000 worth of grain was raised on the unused portion of public roads in Iowa last season. There are in Germany alone 3000 Sunday schools, 30,000 teachers and 300,000 scholars, where twenty-five years ago there was not one. The sum of $400,000 was recently offered for the well-known English medical journal, the Lancet, which was founded in 1823 by Doctor Wakely. The offer was declined, the paper not being for sale. ___________ Three physicians have left Paris for Australia, taking with them germs of chicken cholera. The Australians are about to adopt Pasteur’s plan of de¬ stroying their rabbits, in the face of very strong opposition. In the office of the Recordeh of Deeds, Philadelphia, is preserved a justice’s docket over 100 years old. One of the entries in the volume is as follows: “Commonwealth agt. Stephen Blunt, July 24, 1778. Charged of drinking Damnation to General Washington and all his army. Defendant held in £200. ” Ten tons of Texan cotton seed were recently shipped from Texas to Zanzibar, Africa. An experienced planter accom¬ panied the seed for the purpose of in¬ structing the natives of Zanzibar in the cultivation of the cotton plant. This event marks the introduction of the cot¬ ton plant on the eastern coast of Africa. The Reverend A. J. Swartz, of Chi¬ cago, a believer in metaphysical healing, says that a letter was recently sent by a family in New Zealand describing the symptoms of a friend in this country who was sick with diphtheria. So graphically was the epistle written that its recipients in New Zealand at once became ill frem diphtheria. Old Fhilip Winebiddle, the founder of the Winebiddle Estate in East Liberty, Penn., bought 100 acres of land where the City of Erie now stands sixty years ago and paid $500 for it. Almost be¬ fore the ink was dry on the papers he made up his mind that he had been swindled, but thirty years later the land could not be bought for $2,000,000, and it is now worth $3,000,000. A correspodent, writing from Havana, says that ne never saw a people so clean in regard to their dress. A Cuban stev¬ edore will load molasses on a vessel for a week and one can hardly find a spot upon the white suit when Saturday night comes. The clerks in Havanna look as if they had just stepped out of band boxes. They are usually dressed in pat¬ ent leather gaiters, silk stockings and linen trousers and shirts that are spot¬ lessly white. According to United States Consul, Smithers, our Chinese brethren have recently been playing some sad tricks upon the barbarian merchants of the West. Camels’ hair and wool received in London fromTientsin have been loaded with sand to the extent of one-third of their weight; hides have been gener¬ ally woimv, and many shipments of straw braids have been a total loss, ow¬ ing to damp straw and inferior dyes. Many of these Chinese commodities are now coming to this country. It is a matter of general interest to know that in two years more a century will have elapsed since tne first success¬ ful crop of sea-island cotton was raised by William Elliott, at Hilton Head, South Carolina. It is suggested that it would be appropriate that South G’aro “na should take steps to celebrate in 1890 the centenary of the creation of this great staple, which has been so im¬ portant an element in the material pro¬ gress of that and other Southern States. Charleston Commenting on this suggestion the News and Courier says; “The matter is well worthy of consid¬ eration. The finest cotton in the world is grown on the sea islands of South t arolina. A cotton exposition to be held in Charleston in the fall of 1890 would be an appropriate way in which to signalize one of the greatest events in the history of American life. The first cargo of American cotton was shipped from this port. The most remarkable achievements in the cultivation of the staple have crowned the labors of South ( arolina planters. Here we have every opportunity for exhibiting the qualities and the uses of the plant. It is grown at our er ^” doors; , it . is . picked . in . our „ ‘etas; . it is ginned in our houses, packed in our presses, spun and women in our mills, shipped from our wharves Thou in honor of the king of Southern in commerce, and there is no better place which he can hold his court than in Charleston, the first and best of Ameri Can cotton ports.” CONYERS. GEORGIA. FRIDAY, MAY 11. 1888. NATIONAL CAPITAL INTERESTING DOTS ABOUT OUR UNITED STATES’ OFFICIALS. Go«sfp About th© White House-Army and Navy Matters—Our Relations With Other Countries ami Nations. CONGRESSIONAL. In the Senate Mr. Stewart introduced a bill to execute certain treaty stipula¬ tions prohibiting Chinese immigration. Referred to the committee on foreign re¬ lations. The railroad land grant forfeit¬ ure bill was taken up and amended so as to exclude from its provisions the Por¬ tage Lake canal company and the Onta raio and Brule river company, both of Michigan. Amendments were also adopted relative to the course of proceed ure by land office officials in carrying it into effect. The bill then went over, and the bill for the establishment of a bureau of animal industry was taken up. Mr. Palmer ad¬ dressed the Senate in support of the bill. When the doors were reopened the bill was passed to perfect the quarantine service of the United States. It imposes a punishment of a fine of not more than $300, or imprisonment for not more than 30 days, or both, upon any person, mas¬ ter, pilot or owner of a vessel entering any United States port in violation of the quarantine regulations, framed under the act to prevent the introduction of infec¬ tious or contagious diseases into the United States. It provides for the es¬ tablishment of additional quarantine stations at the mouth of Delaware Bay, the entrance of Chesapeake Bay, Cape Charles on the Georgia coast at or near Key West and at several Pacffic coast points. Appropriations are made as follows for the construction and maintenance of quaran¬ tine stations: At Delaware breakwater, $75,000; Cape Charles, Va., $112,000; South Atlantic station, Sapelo sound, $38,500; Key West, $88,000; gulf quarantine, formerly Ship island, $15,000. The Senate adjourned. in ... .Mr. Belmont of New York, presented the House, and it was adopted, the conference report on the joint resolutions accepting, on behalf of the United States, the invitation of the French republic to take part in the international exhibition to be held in Paris in 1889. The com¬ missioner representing the United States will receive a salary of $10,000. The House then went into committee of the whole, Mr. Springer, of Illinois, in the chair, on the tariff hill. The bill reported in the Senate as a substitute for the Cullom bill, proposing amendments to tbe interstate commerce law, proposes to amend the sixth section of that law so as to require that “piinted schedules of rates shall be kept open to the public." The only amendments of general interest proposed are destitute one to per¬ and mit a railroad to carry free homeless persons, transported by charita¬ ble societies, and another to permit munici¬ a railroad to give reduced rates to pal goverinents for the transportation of indigent persons. In secret session Mr. Sherman reported back the Chinese foreign treaty from the Senate committee on re¬ lations with the recommendation of committee that it be ratified.... In the House, Mr. Harner, of Pennsylva¬ nia, presented a memorial of dealers in tobacco of Philadelphia, in favor of the speedy repeal of the entire tax on tobac¬ co. Referred. On motion of Mr. Phe¬ lan, of Tennessee, tbe Senate bill was passed for the establishment of a light¬ house at Newport News, and Middle Ground, Va. The House then went into committee of the whole (Mr. Springer, of Illinois, in the chair) on the tariff bill. GOSSIP. On motion of Mr. Houk, of Tennessee, a bill was passed by the House authoriz¬ ing the construction of a br.dge across the Tennessee river at Knoxville, Tenn. The appropriations committee notified the Georgia delegation that they wmuld be heard the Atlanta in regard Colored to the Exposition, appropriation which for the sub-committee have reported favor¬ ably. If the delegates ask for an appro¬ priation it will be given, and as the dele¬ gation could not do otherwise, it is al¬ ready prac.ically obtained. Mrs. Cleveland is much pleased with a stylish pony phaeton and the new sorrel team, which she drives herself with Haw r - kiiis, the old negro driver, who has been at the White House since the Grant ad¬ ministration, seated in the boot behind. She is a good driver and holds the spir¬ ited horses well in check. Miss Rose Elizabeth Cleveland, who has been af the VS bite House for the past two weeks, generally accompanies her. A hill "was appropriations reported from the House committee on accordance with appropriat¬ ing $450,000 in the rec¬ ommendation of the secretary of the treasury, to make up the deficiencies in the appropriation for collecting the reve¬ nue from customs. Among the ports at which deficiencies existed are the follow¬ ing, with the amounts to be paid them: Charleston, S. C., $1,021.20; Savannah, Ga.. $1,258.48; Wilmington, N. C., $785.16; Mobile, Ala., $766.56. Tbe present session of Congress will undoubtedly extend well into , and prob¬ ably nearly through the Summer. If a tariff bill should pass the House at all, it will hardly be done before the middle of j UD6j an d the finance committee of the Senate wmuld scarcely be prepared to re¬ port it back short of several weeks, and then several more weeks would be con w ;u even take more time than between now and the 15th of June to defeat it, and whether tariff legislation be or be not enacted, it is evident that this isdes tmed to be the longest session of Con¬ gress of many years. The weather crop bulletin, issued by the Signal Office, says: During the past week the weather lias been unfavorable for growing crops in Minnesota, Dakota and Nebraska, where seeding lias been temporarily suspended owing to cold and heavy rains. In Illinois, Missouri, Kan¬ sas and Louisiana, the weather has been generally favorable and the growing crop is probably improved during the week. In Mississippi, Alabama, South Carolina and North Carolina, rain is greatly Although needed less than for the all usual growing crops. amount of rain occurred in Ohio, Indiana. Ken¬ tucky ,nd Tennessee, a number of well distributed showers the occurring in th se states during week have doubtless resulted in. the improvement of the crop condition. BOTH LOVED HIM. A duel took place recently at a email Mormon settlement in Luna valley, near San Marco, N. M., between two lovesick Mormon maidens. They had become en¬ amored of the same youth, James Whit¬ man, a cowboy and a Gentile. Their names are Sarah Bollon and Mary Lee more, aged sixteen and eighteen the years. They were always friends up to time of their love affair. They met a short time before the duel in the adobe taber¬ nacle in the hamlet and had a fight right then and there. This increased their hatred, and from that time up to the day of the duel both went armed with a re¬ volver. They finally met by mutual agreement on the outskirts of the small village and proceeded to fight a duel. There were no attendants. They meas¬ ured off about twelve paces, drew their revolvers, and fired shot after shot. The firing attracted the attention of some farmers working near by who rushed to the scene of the duel. When they ground ar¬ rived Miss Bollon was lying on the screaming, with blood flowing from an ugly wound in the shoulder. A few feet from her lay her revolver in the dust. Miss Leemore stood like a statue about a rod away, looking silently at her pros¬ trate rival, with her revolver still smok¬ ing in her hand. When the men ap¬ proached to disarm her she fled, and shrieked: “Yes, I have killed her, and I am glad of it!” Miss Bollon was carried to the nearest house, where her wound was dressed. She was found to ba seriously, though not fatally, wounded. DEADLY ENCOUNTER. E. L. Martin, publisher of the A 'eio Mississippian, of Jackson, publishes the following account of the tragedy which took place there. Mr. Martin, his rel¬ ative, was returning to his office from his dinner, at. about 2 o’clock, when he was met midway between his home and his office by Gen. Wirt Adams and a friend, who had left the postoffice a few minutes earlier and were proceeding to¬ wards Martin’s home. An eye witness, Walter Johnson, who was standing near, and states that Adams stopped Martin engaged him in conversation for about a minute, when Adams drew his pistol and fired, knocking Martin’s hat off. Adams’ second shot brought Martin to his knce j . The latter experienced considerable diffi¬ culty in drawing his pistol, but finally succeeding, he fired rapidly. The third shot by Adams caused Martin to fall flat on his back. After a few seconds, how¬ ever, he partially rose and steadying him¬ self on one elbow shot Adams direcily through the heart, killing him instantly. Martin lived a few minutes only, remark¬ ing to Charles Campbell; “I am a dead man.” Owing to the fact that Martin is believed to have received four shots while only three chambers of Adams’s pistol were empty some suspicions friend, at¬ taches to Ned Farrish, Adams’s and an investigation will be held. Mar¬ tin, though only twenty-five years of age, stood at the head of Mississippi journal¬ ism. Gen. Adams was between sixty five and seventy years of age and was one of Mississippi’s most distinguished men. SEVERE DISCIPLINE. At or near English, Crawford county. Ind., the “White Caps” were visited out on one of their raids. They first the res¬ idence of Peter Denton, near English, and took his wife out and tied her to a tree and gave her forty lashes over the hack with hickory switches. They then rode into English, and, going to the res¬ idence ot Wm. IT. Toney, took him out of bed, tied him to a telegraph pole and gave him one hundred lashes with stout hickory switches on the bare back. The residence of A. J. Goodman, m the sub¬ urbs of English was next visited. They gave Goodman forty-eight hours in which to go to work and earn a support for his family or take a hundred lashes. The “White Caps” then went to the residence of James Pro, editor of the local paper, and left a note for him to publish in the next issue of his paper. In this note the “White Caps” say that any man found using money in the purchase of votes, treating with liquors to influence voters or in any manner attempting to cor rapt the ballot during the pending polit ical canvass, will be taken from his home, tied face inward to a tree and given two hundred lashes on the bare back, and, for an aggravated hundred offense of this character, three lashes will be inflicted. The citizens think this to be about the right thing. A FLY EATER. A boy about ten years of age, living at Martin’s Mill, Tenn., has acquired a mania for eating flies, and will turn away from the daintiest dishes for this,* his favorite diet. He eats them, he says, because he loves them, and resorts to all kinds of schemes to catch them. He ys his little brother likes them as well as he does, but is too lazy to catch them. SOUTHERN GOSSIP. BOILED DOWN FACTS AND FAN¬ CIES INTERESTINGLY STATED. Accidents on Land and on Sea-New Enter¬ prises—Suicides—'lteligious* Temperance and Social Matters. The governor issued an order to the First regiment Alabama state troops to go into encampment at Mobile on the 11th of June. The Tennessee Druggists’ Association met in Chattanooga. Resolutions were adopted advocating the organization of a state pharmaceutical association. Thos. Durden, a masonry contractor on the line of the Powell’s Valley railroad, Tennessee, was killed by a stone from a blast. Ilis skull was literally smashed to a jelly and death was almost instantan¬ eous. A heavy hailstorm swept over a great extent of country from Wilson to Wil¬ mington, N. C. It has done damage of a serious nature to the growing and crops. the In continued to hail an hour, hailstones were very large. Alfred Gentry, colored, a train porter on the Nashville, Chattanooga & St. Louis railway, had his skull crushed while “skylarking” with another porter on the platform not far from Murfrees¬ boro, and fell on to the rails. Loundes county, Ala., has been all torn up by some colored men, who resisted the sheriff when he attempted to arrest Sev¬ them, and shot some of liis posse. eral military companies from Montgom¬ riot. ery were ordered there and quelled the Quite a strike is in progress at the Pratt mines, at Birmingham, Ala. The five company proposed to reduce wages The cents a ton and the miners resisted. matter will ho discussed by the board in a day or two. A strike is also on at the Wheeling mines. A special tax levy on each dollar of taxable property in Chattanooga, Teuu., the is the latest sensation furnished by city council. An ordinance to that effect has been introduced and passed its first reading. The tax payers are indignant, and the exposure of extravagant expendi¬ tures is looked for. The anniversary of the battle of Guil¬ ford, N. C., was celebrated in grand style at Greensboro, lion. David Sclienck delivered a stirring oration, depicting in glowing language the heroism of the soldiers of the Revolution. Gov. Scales also delivered a patriotic address. The plaid mills in North Carolina have decided to cut off the productions of plaids for the next ninety days, This was arranged at a meeting of the plaid mill owners at which twenty-two mills were represented. The market for plaids is largely overstocked and business light, as is often the case in a presidential year. Fire originated in the small Harris grocery store of Costello Bros., on street, Sandersville, Ga.; cause unknown. The flames spread rapidly; the town had no adequate fire apparatus, and the entire block from McCarty’s store to Haines’ hall was in flames. All that portion of Harris street, which is the main business street, from McCarty’s brick store to C. R. Pringle’s residence, across Haines street and back on Haines street as far as the residences of Mrs. Colin and J. A. Ronson, was burned. The loss aggre¬ gates $100,000; insurance $50,000. C. W. Moore, president, II. Y. Miller, vice-president, J. W. Quayle, secretary and teasurer of the alleged bogus “Hon¬ duras Mining and Prospective Company, ” claiming to have an office at 26 Caronde let street, in New Orleans, La., from which point circulars were sent by mail throughout the country, and remittances obtained, were to-day indicted by the United States grand jury charged defraud, with feloniously devising a scheme to “to be effected by opening correspon¬ dence with other persons by means of the post office establishment of the Uni¬ ted States, and taking letters from the post office in furthering the scheme in violation of law.” Six years ago, two young men named James Bailey and John Roberson, left Charleston, Miss., intending to go over to the river farm of Col. J. S. Bailey. Only a few miles of the journey could be made on horseback, before reaching the eastern limit of the water which, at that time, covered nearly the whole of the Mississippi valley, in some places nearly a hundred miles wide. The rest of the way was to be made in a dugout, through an uncleared swamp of great gum and cy¬ press trees,cane brakes and vines. These young men, against the i emonstrances ol some friends, whom they passed on the w*ay, persisted in their efforts to make the* trip. From some cause, which will forever remain a matter of conjecture, tiie ‘ ‘dug out” was capsized, and the twe men w'ent down to rise no more. Their bodies have just been recovered. CHURCH CONFERENCE, ~ The General , Conference „ of ... the African , . . M. E. Church will meet in Indianapolis I n d- Considerable interest is cen erct i n tbe General Conference, because a l® as t four new Bishops are to be e cc et. Among the prominent candidates mcn tioned are Dr. W. B. Derrick, of New York; Dr. T. B. Tanner, of Philadelphia; Dr. B. F. Lee, editor of the Christian Recorder, and Drs. Johnson and Handy, of Baltimore, and Dr. Gaines, of Atlan ta, Ga. The session will last about three weeks. The General Conference has jurisdiction over Canada, West Indies Hayti and San Domingo, of Ctiarlei Dickens is _ n r and copies MoS. lor a liv nig. WORLD AT LARGE. PEN PICTURES PAINTED BY A CORPS OP ABLE ARTISTS. Wliat Is Going on North* East and West and Across the Water-TIie Coming En* ropean storm. ing. Minister Pendleton is rapidly daily. recover¬ He takes carriage rides Fifteen banking houses in Buenos Ayres have suspended within ten days. Mount Etna, in Italy, is in a state of activity, but the eruption has not assumed a serious aspect. Gen. Carl Schurz and Bismarck havo been discussing politics at Berlin very amicably over their beer. At the Democratic territorial conven¬ tion held at Ogden, Utah, all the Mor¬ mon delegates were excluded. Gen. Boulanger’s friends in Paris liavo distributed free, 2,000,000 copies of his book on the Franco-German-War. Emperor Don Pedro, of Brazil, who is suffering with throat disease similar to Emperor Frederick, lies dangerously ill at Milan. Dispatches from India announce that Delhi and Moradabad have been visited by disastrous hail storms, about one hun¬ dred and fifty persons having been killed. The hailstones were flat and oval in shape, and some of them weighed as much as two pounds. grievance Chairman Hodge, of the committee of the Brotherhood of Loco¬ motive Engineers at Chicago, Ill., says the strike has not been declared off, but the men have been allowed to secure their places with the Burlington com¬ pany at the best terms they can get. In the Edgar Thomson’s Steel Works, at Pittsburg, Pa., the new rail mill was put in operation recently, and the first rails made since last December were turned out. Pinkerton guards are still on duty, but everybody is in good humor, and no further disorder is expected. Col. William It. Aylett, of Pickett’s division, delivered a lecture in Philadel¬ phia, Pa., on “Gettysburg,” before a large and distinguished andience, in¬ cluded among which was Mrs. General Pickett. He paid a glowing tribute to Generals Grant, Sherman, McClellan and Hancock. Mrs. Pickett says she takes great interest in the great ussem blage of Northern and Southern soldiers which occurs at Gettysburg early in July. The schooner, Edward E. Webster, ol Gloucester, Mass., arrived at San Fran¬ cisco, Cal., after a six months’ voyage, during which she ran out of all provisions except musty flour, and the greater dying part of her crew came near from a strange disease, probably caused by insufficient food, The meat on board became tainted and had to be thrown overboard. Soon after several of the crew fell ill of a strange complaint, which swelled their limbs, made them useless and several died. About three miles above Centerville, Ohio, at Milkanna Station, as the train of Miller and Freeman’s circus, passing that point, went through a deep cut known as “Backbone,” it met a landslide which threw the engine and five cars from the track, piling them up in. a con¬ fused and broken mass. A. H. Stillwell, of Wellsville, O., engineer, was terribly scalded. Elmer Ellsworth, of Colum¬ bus, Ohio, a colored cook, was killed outright. The passenger coaches, con¬ taining performers, were uninjured, as were also the cars containing the horses. Edgar L. Hermance, late pastor of the Presbyterian church, in the village of White Plains, N. Y., shot himself while in the pulpit. Ilermance’s resignation was asked for some months ago, in con¬ sequence of dissatisfaction arising be¬ tween himself and the flock over his sal ary. Ilis wife is the daughter of ex¬ President Woolsey, D. D., LLD., of Yale college. Shortly before he shot himself, llermancc was sitting within the chancel conversing with the sexton, John Blake¬ ly, and appeared perfectly rational. Hardly had he closed the church door on leaving, when he was startled by the report of a pistol shot, and rushing back into the church, found the pastor stretch¬ ed prone upon the floor of the pulpit, l ie was bleeding profusely from a bullet hole in his right temple. Close beside him lay a smoking 32-calibre revolver. BAD WORK. A Burlington & Quincy freight train was badly wrecked when entering the Louisville, New Albany and Chicago yards at Chicago, Ill., and under circum¬ stances which leads to the belief that it was the work of the strikers or sympa¬ thizers. After the engine and two ears had passed, some unknown miscreant threw the switch and the next fifteen cars were piled up in a hopeless wreck in a ditch. Just as the switch was thrown, a man pear the rear of the train threw a tie on the track, wrecking the last three cars, and at the same time a car of “dope” material of a highly inflammable nature, used tor oiling wheels, which was in the center of the train, was on fire and destroyed. The conductor was found lying near the tracks nearly insensible. He bad been beaten by three men who boarded his caboose. He cannot live. The crew of tbe wrecked train was en¬ tirely made up of new men. WHOLESALE REFORMS. The bishops of the Methodist church in annual session at New Y'ork severely criticized secular Sunday newspapers, and claim that they are one of the means of robbing the people of their day of rest. The liquor traffic was advised. deprecated, and total prohibition was NO. 11. AN OPEN SECRET. What is it that gives to the plainest face The charm of the sweetest beauty? Not the thought of the duty of happiness, But the happiness of duty. This is Life’s lesson, children dear, They are blest who learn it early For it brightens the darkest day with cheer, Though Fortune’s face bo surly. There’s a certain narrow, quiet path Of daily thinking and living, Of little deeds of sacrifice, Of loving and forgiving. Of patience and obedience, Of gentle speech and action, Of choosing the right and leaving the wrong With a sunny satisfaction; And if we never leave this path For the thing the world calls pleasure, There will come to meet us a heavenly joy Beyond all powor to measure. For on this narrow, quiet way, God’s angels move for ever, Waiting to crown with peace divine Our every high endeavor. Yes, this is what sheds on the lowliest life The glow of -the sweetest beauty, Not the thought of the duty of happiness, But the happiness of dutyl —Celia Ihaxtcr, in Youth's Companion. PITII AND POINT. Spring novelties—Fine days. A host in himself—The landlord. Perspiration never rains—It simply pores. Much adieu about nothing—-A woman’s farewell. There are no rounds of drinks in the ladder of success. A pen may he driven, but a pencil does the best when it is lead. Teacher—“What is lava?” Junior Girl—“What men put on their faces when shaving.” Time flies and stays for no man. The only fellow who can beat it is the musi¬ cian. —Merchant Traveler. Agent (at the door)—“Is the lady of the house in?” Gentleman (calling to his wife) : “Ma’-y, is the cook in?” Mamma—“And who dwelt in the gar¬ den of Eden,Freddie?” Freddie—“Oh, I know; the Adamses !"—Harvard Lam¬ poon. Judge—“Madame, wliat is ago?” your She—“Your Honor, I leave that to the mercy of the court .”—Buffalo Com mercial. Let a woman busy herself with hammer and nails, and it is usually difficult to determine wliat she is driving at.— De¬ troit Free Press. “May I help you to alight?” said a young man to a lady about to leave the railway car. “No, thanks,” said she, “I don’t smoke.” The girl t hat hath a dimple she Doth know it, lips And always bites her pretty To show it. — Mercury. At the restaurant: Haughty Stranger waiter." —“Your thumb is in my soup, Waiter—“Well, it don’t take up much room. If you kick, though I’ll fill the bowl up.” A spark arrester is a recent locomotive device; but nothing seems to fill the bill of a spark arrester so well as a good, healthy dog with a knack of holding on. — lloitonBnd.ijet. , Young Physician (pompously)—“Yes, three times I’ve called at Mr. Brown’s a day for a week. ile is a very sick man, Miss Smith.” Miss Smith—“He must be by this time.”— Epoch. An old man who never did anything WOKC in his youth than throw a snow¬ ball at a dead cat, will amuse himself by the hour telling you what a bad boy he was .—Philadelphia Call. Bjones— “That fellow Gagley tried to borrow $500 of me this morning." Smythe— “Five hundred? lie must bo cracked!” Bjones—“No; he’s not cracked. He’s broke.”— Life. Lieut. Boxer (showing his cousin around the cantonment)—“Would “It’s you like to look at the magazine:” Stuyvcsant—“Thank just over there.” Miss you, no. Papa subscribes for them all.” The Rev. E. D. Huntley, of Washing¬ ton, has delivered a lecture on “The Girl to Love anil IIow to Treat Her.” The how to treat her depends upon the season of the year .—Richmond Dispatch. It is all well enough to say that thir¬ teen is an unlucky number, but America started in business with thirteen states, and seemed to be holding her own up Tid- to the time of going to press .—Lomlon Bits. Husband—“What is that you are read¬ ing, my dear?” Wife—“A letter from -other.” Husband—-‘Anything im¬ portant?” Wife—“I don’t know, I haven’t got to the postscript yet.”— Harper's Bazar. other , Chauncey M. Depew the morn¬ ing found his coachman’s children play¬ ing about, and he introduced himself. “Well, my little man, and do you know who I am!” Boy “Yes; you’re the man as rides in father’s carriage.”— Mercury. all Sharp Husband—“Been shopping day, you say?” Sharper Wife—“r.ver since breakfast." Husband—‘‘Why, I hadn’t but fifty cents to give you this morning.” Wife—“That was plenty. I never pay more than that for lunch.— Omaha World. Tramp (to partner)—“Did the old man give up anything, Bill?” Partner “Naw!” Tramp- “Wliat did you say to him?” Partner—“I asked him if he couldn’t help a poor man who was out o’ work, and he said he could give me some’ work. Times Epoch. seems to be gettln’ wuss every day.”—