Newspaper Page Text
w. £. Publisher.
)U ■■
■
***•? ii 2
UggS ^ Saturday,
policed every
odl * W. E. HASP,
r POLIAKS PEli ANNUM.
,jqt
, “:-\. , rS ,RU ADVERTISING:
uts -will be inserted for ONft
(! #“ for the first insertion;
: inr .. t for
I. , [-c< per square each con
[b 1 ' *) joonth, or will less, be For made. a long
n ,j ,:iseonht
; ' 8 in length, or less, constitutes
! jl(?s ja the lecal colnmn.willbein
Cents per line, each insertion.
' 1D (1 deaths will be published an
,, obituaries will be charged
■ "/.Rising '. i.mfc
|b rates.
...j will lie give n to merchants
,thtr v ’]o doin’ to advertise by the
W. A. HARP.
Business Manager.
IIUIfftrT ifi®p.Byrr$ No. £2 EL Eighth St,
f UK/ St. Louis, Mo; the
r ?,,, I,act crpafer t-rperifnee in the treatment of
■ l!S j both female than any physician
, the re mits of his long a;:<l Bnrcesoiul
“puYSIOLOGY ' '-i-vonetr work*,just publiuhcd, entitled
: CF MARRIAGE
' ppjivATS MEDICAL ADVISES?
...... nud f*>!f«Tnniriic(or« in all rhtit
r.B(l Y/oninuhooi 1 . Riid supply •,%
lyillubtmird, and in plain 54i.
c two books boi!vmarried embrace
irforri t> {leu for and
, prove ’.Tientsin knowledge medical treatment Imparted
« ' n ])o:aeiMper.i cay; “Vive
., • • v ; In ]\n way pf qucrtionable ciicr-*
^jp.;’ -s (.. iiU’/ y Gu:t every on-;* should know. Th©
.Vi,r;' i, ft Ay ,‘hut indi tcretiori; -:T waning thft vfr Mini, in otherwise the prime
y 2 vb in v. niSwygHlc or
mi l,
it. her sc:; is heiftf Ii't; jl m pa Its
M L a
f".j prit: in sioimyoi-stomps- ! .i!: im'Ii r Beil,onfe[ \M |l K
9 .
I GEO. W. GtEATON 3
iimw ^ katTj
mm: : : GEORGIA,
?
F| w -ioi' in Bio Superior and Supreme
m;n! th# Strtt-'.
ii allcntiuii given io ilic collection of
xmiy3-ly
Ai C« M^CALLAj
Attorney at Law
mvEns, GEORGIA
rill practice in nock dale and adjoinirg coftn
k v3-n!5-ly
V'
fls3 I
IWracs. LOUISVILLE, MY.,
A rtw’nrly educated nrd legally will quail fled physlclaP Cures and tha
tv -thf Tul, as hia practice prove. pi iforma
cfyiv-to,,chronic nn\ sexualdfe»oa3ea, gpermiUtOT®*
rhea and Xmpoteney. aa^thoresuitofseif
tksoFi yonti>, sermt ^excesses in mature? years, or other
omQ cfthe folio .wing effectsNervous
s, Dimness of Sipht, Defective Mem
srv, I’|« tv, Pimpled ou Face, Aversion to Societv of
! imr.il* ntnak 1 1 , L’onfudon of Ideas, I.oas ol'Bexual Dower, ae.#
u. T'oiiz r?i;;rn'.'L v j Intnroner or tinhappv. ore thoroughly
vate OHRHEA? discuses quickly cured. Stricture, Patients treated Plh sond by moil other or pn- ex*
widcorrcspnndeuce^trictl pr<n ConsnUatiod !*• and invited, charges reasonably
7 confidential.
A PRIVATE COUNSELOR
OfSOOpntrcs, rent to cny •’» qrldrefts, necurel.t Foaled, for thirty
(f'td'us. Shou'd 1 toad by all. ./.ddross as above*
iiOiM hours from l) A. il. i.u 7 P. M, D udaya, 2 to A P.
The Itcmcdy cX the lOih C*ntnry,
Barham’s Infaliibto
w mi mm.
\ & U* ri* C / Mnnufhc.tr. ve d by the
' y < Barham Pile Cure Co., Durham, £T. C.
11- m»vi*r f»n» to euro Hemorrhoids
or when a euro 3s
l*rler» and bona fide
■turaibhed on uppliuulica
• » 01 SimwFs,
Whitehall St. Atlanta, Ga.
WHOLESALE AND RETAIL DEALER IN
rosy, Mia. (lias; aiil lone fares,
^hvi:rt-PLATsn> Lamps, Lanterns,
goods.
C' tinods Carefully Repacked. Quick sales
lndShort Profits, for CASH. Established 1850.
march 2,1878. Gin.
PRESCRIPTION t till' surnly 1 Weakness, FEES Lost 1
•umi(i" \ eim'ol'Sc-minal tndis
l ;u,<i an disorders Uronelit on by
'Una o r oxi ess. Anv Dnursost has the Invre
H Or. »V. J A < 0 .. No. JSO
Sixth Mwt, <Tm‘ci3>i:rii. O.
WOK BEFORE YOU .BUY.
"MliS & SillllBDl,
DEALERS IN
pi Motions, ssees,
hats, caps, SllOES,
BOOTS, &c.
SOOCEBIES
OF ALL KINDS.
^ 01 in o * Tobacco fact, Everything and Cigars, Confectioneries!
Kept in a
FIRST class store.
WEST DEMI, IS OUR I 3 TT 0 .
v ri MAIMS CASH and Short Profits.
■
Co “yers Ga. Feb. 16, 1878. tf
W
HOB.toU'TlZ’S and CATTLE POWDERS,
m - wSiff
OPIUM Th« CUBE. and Opium Worthington, Original Morphine Eating, Send Greene stamp and to hahtt W only for Co., B. absolute eurrd. book Squire^ lud. on
PRINTING
at Tins OFFICE.
THE (GOITERS EM1IS1H.
“ Error Ceases fee
to Dangerous, While Truth is Left Tree to Combat it,”
CON YE ItS, GA.. SA T URDA\ T, APRIL 27 1878.
% -L ,
i 1
Purifies the Blood, Renovates
and Invigorates the Whole
System.
ITS MEDICAL properties are
Alterative, Tonic, Solvent*
and Diuretic.
carefully-selected \ EGLTIKE isj made exclusive'y from the juices
barks, routs and, hoibs, and so
b*.. on;;-y c« uiuetibrated that if will clTectually eradicate
from the Hj .-item, every taint of .Scroi’uhi; IScrofu*
loim jiii'.ncf* Tnwiorftij ranrci*, ( aKccroiia
H«:iior , Eryalj^ilps, Suit Rlietnii, U
1:1 ic Diseases, (‘jinkiT, Fain:mss at t?:o
Slomudi. Mid a 1 dihrus«s that arise from impure
blood. SuL.Iieil, Ir fltsaiKiraoTy and Chronic
I* heimtuci*-;*, Cout$ and .Spinal
( Alinplanits, can on.y bo effectually curedthrough,
the blood.
Uor l .Lwrs aivi Fruptive Diseases of the
Skh:, files, Uiir.vies, JUlotelus, Roils,
Tetter, SiuiULemi, an-J Hin»v. o; ui, Veaetine
has never l a <' - *o c-fiuct a pennanont. cure.
lor l»i»; i< in the Bark, Kidney Com¬
plaints, Uronsv, "emali; Weakness, !.«»
eouiiie:., m.-.i’K from internal ulceration, and
utbnns acts C’^da'-ea i n 1 (a ntral hcltilhy, Vege
TINK oireoi.y npi.n the causes of these com.
p .ants. It u7*fforatc3 and strengthens the whole
system, nets upon the secretive organs, allays inflam¬
mation, fives ulceration laid rcijulatcs the bowels.
r»v Calarih, IlyKjiepnia; Habitual Coa
tivcncai,, PrJpItaticu of the Ilesut, Head¬
rrostratioii ache, I’Hes, NeivauMicsK, and Ceueiid
uf the Nervous System, no
medicine has ever given such perfect satisfaction us
tl’e V..C J’ilMK. It purities the blood, cleanses ail of
the organs, and posesses a controlUhgpoweroTferthe
nervous system.
'i ho remarkahlo cures effected by Vegetine have
induced many physicians and apothecaries whom wa
know, to prescribe and use it in their own families.
In fact, Vegutixe is the-hest femudy yet discov.
ci ed for the above diseases, and is the only reliable
llLUtil) PCIUii'iC iiyet placed before tlie public.
UilQUAliFEED AFPREGIATIOfi,
II. R. Stev fioSTOK, Nov. 18,1875.
hear (Sir,—-durinfc’tl.o past five yearn I have had
ample opportunity io juiifre of the merit or Vege
j (NT. Aiy who liafe ip mi it, fur ooiupmiiits aitendiiuj
11 lany ot deiicate huait Ji, v/it.i ltjure benolicial rosul^s
Jhan i anyumi it qhdciYfcjii cub© wLich sW ovt r tried, i havo
I veu tv) iny* undor ovory cirouiu
Stance marked at lionetit. ten ding I a have larjuo lamijy, ana always with
taken it myself with bucii
preat benetit that 1 caimut hud words t<i express my
Unqu.'i.lilied \V hile a|)|ire< iatuni of its goodness.
this , city, perionuiuK jt ijfct?, been my Jot duticb as a Police Officer in
Coal my (<> lall in with n trreat
or sit k.ieK:;. 1 anhpritatinfrly reoohmiend Veu
I'Ti.NE, and I Hover knew ot a cube where n didiiot
| > rove •ill that‘JVM claimed for it. Particularly, it,
cases ot a debilitated or impoverished btuto ot t}i>j
blood itu effects aro really wonderful; and i\>r nl<
com plinnta arisms from an impure state of the blood
it appear.; to work like a charm, and 1 do not believe
there are any circtinistaucea under which Vegetike
can he used with injurious results, and it will always
atiord what nio pleasure know to hive any further information
as to i abyut Vegetin WM. l.
B. HILL,
Police Station 4.
CAWNOT BE EXCELLED.
H. R. Steyex s• Chaklesxown, Mass.
Hear Sir,— J'liis is to certify {list,1 liave used your
“Blood Preparation ” in my family for several years,
and think that for Scrofula or Cankerous Humors or
Rheumatic affections it cannot he excelled ; and as a
blood purifier and spring liaye medicine it is the best thin
I have over used, recommend and 1 used almost everything.
Euclt 1 1 can cheerfully medicine. it to any one in need ot
a , > ■ • ,
• Yours DLNSidOllii, respectfully,
Mrs. A. A. 19 Russell Street,
VECETIME
, ( , Prepared by
H. It. Stevens, Boston,Mass;
Vegetine is Sold by all Druggists*
GO
B 0 j B MNiF©aB !, S
FOR WINES.
LIQUORS,
CiDER,
CHAMPAGNE; Ac.
Oysters,
Sardines,
Crackers,
Soaps,
Blacking.
FINE CIGARS and TOBACCO.
Pickles, Peanuts, Candies, &c.j
BOTTLED BEER CP THE BEST BEARDS 1
A Specialty.
rCCTAll Kinds of FANCY DRINK S
at Short Notice.
A FINE BILtt/RD TABLE
attached and Privately arranged.
Under the Whitehead House,
Conyers, Ga: Feb. 16, 1878.
sirni; niiiiH;
NO. ID WHITE FRONT,
CONYERS, GA ■-«*
— Dealers in—
DRY GOODS, FAMILY GROCEllIES
HARD-WARE.
CUTLERY,
CllOCKERY-WARE,
GLASS- Vi ARE, etc.
HARNESS,
Clotin, Hals. Cars. Boots, aMStejCleaj.
A full line of Notions and Ladies Dress
Goods.
A FINE LOT OF .
GOOD TOBACCO, CIGARS, ETC.
WOODEN-WARE, TINWARE,
Jug-\Yave, and Bratarria Dippers, &c,i
Sardines, Crackers,
Fancy Candies, Nuts, etc.
In fact we keep a good Stock of all that is
usually kept in a first class Dry Goods or Gro¬
cery store. All of which we
WILL SELL ON TIME TO GOOD PARTIES.
aplr. 13, ly.
a week in your own town. $5 outfit
9 free. No risk. Reader, if you want a
business at which persons of either sex
_ _
caii make great pav all the time they work,
write for particulars to H. Ballet & Go.Port
land, Maine.
POETRY.
__ "~ =Z=
THE PHILOSOPUyUf~life;
In Church and in State
It is rule or be ruled
In courtship and marriage
It is fool or be fooled;
In logic an i law
It is nick or be nicked;
In gambling and trade
It is trick or be tricked;
In Iriaty and war
It is beat or be beaten
In the struggle of life
It s eat or be eaten,
HOW LITTLE WE KNOW.
How little we know of t ach other,
Wo pass*through the journey of life; *
A Ifcli its struggles, its fears and temptations
Its heart-breaking cares and its strife,
V e can only see things on the surface,
For- few people glory in sin,
Ami an unruffled face is no index
io the tumult which rages within.
How little we know cf each other,
I he man who to-day passes by,
Blest with fortune and honor and titles,
Ahd .holding his proud head on high,
May carry a dead secret w th him
Which makes his bosom a hell,
And he, sooner or later, a felon,
May writhe in the prisoner’s cell.
How little we know of each other,
That woman of fashion, who sneer :
At the poor girl betrayed and abandoned,
And left to tier sighs and tears,
May, ere the sun rises to-morrow,
, Have the mask rudely torn from her face
And sink from the height of her glory
To the dark sliad,.s of shame and disgrace.
How little we know of eaca other,
Of ourselves too little know •
We are all weak when under temptation,
All subject to error and woe.
Khan let blessed charity rule us,
Let us put away envy and strife—
For the skeleton grim in our closet
May foive day be brought to light.
One ot the greatest pedestrian fetha on
record was accomplished in this city°y cs
I.-rday. An old t oper passed a saloon
without' walking in.— [Philadelphia
Chronicle.
Women who would hesitate about cry¬
ing before a husband of a lover have IK)
scruple about shedding tears before an
.atidience. It is with their emotions as
with their shoulders ; they are only tlis
played in public.
The wonderful sricess of the teleph one
is all owing to the fact that you can at.
tich one end of it to a mule’s ear and
s rear at him in seven languages without
running flic risk of g Ring kicked.—
[Philadelphia Chronicle.
A negfo teamster in Nashville declares
that he must either give up driving
mules or withdraw trom tlie church, the
two positions being incompatible.
Sunday school teacher: ‘Who was
the Strongest man V Boy: ‘Jonah, be¬
cause tlie whale couldn’t bold him after
he got him down.’
Consolation—Inebriate—‘Now, fiiok
here: wbat I shay is; what’s the use
o’ riches ? S’pose a man’s a Roth—you
know—-a Rothschild bank, eh ? Well,
what’s the good of it? He can’t get no
more drunk than I can—now can he?’
A benister gave this reminiscence in
an after dinner speech : ‘When i began
to practice I was in perfect rages ; the
smallest hole in my shirt was the one I
stuck my head thiough, and I had to
have that, my only shirt, washed by the
dozen, for it was in twelve pieces. - ’
‘Squigglums.’— ‘School mistress [jnst
beginning a nice improving lesson upon
minerals to the juniors]: ‘Now what
are the principal things we get out of the
earth V Youthful angler, a?tat lour
(confidently): ‘Worms.’
A Vicksburg negro fell front the deck
of a steamboat the other day, vVas sucked
under a coal barge, came up in time to
catch his breath before he slid under a
ralt a mi'e long,’ and finally scrambled
ashore down at Warrentown, about sev¬
en miles below, with the remark, ‘No
use tryin', ye kant drown a deep water
Baptis V
A correspondent of Harper’s Maga¬
zine sends to ‘The Drawer’ a copy of an
order received by a Broome county den¬
tist, which says : ‘My mouth is five in¬
ches acrost, five>eight inches threw the
jaw. Sum humoky on the edge. Shap¬
ed like a hoss-sbew, too forrard. If you
want me to be more pertickler, I shal
hav to cum that*.’
The wise daughter is the pride of her
father, yea, her mother also doth delight
in her ; but the foolish maiden bringeth
sorrow. She ban get h on the front gtte;
she tippeth rip her hat over her left eat;
her eye is full of the Old Nick ; she
glaoceth oVer her shoulder when she
promenades on Broad street. Her hand¬
kerchief, is also seen. Then the dry
feth goods clerks say : *Ha, ha Y Ke
to himself; he maketh Mistakes i n I
the measure of a calico.
hospitality.
^ fl,e hospitality is a thing that touch
eS the beart and l) c\cv goes beyond the
circle 61 generous impulses. Eutertain
me «t with the true hbspitable man means
more than the mere feeding of the body;
it meins an interchange of sou! gifts.
Still it should have laws, as ali things
good must have laws to govern them,
i he obligation to be hospitable is a
sacred one, emphasized by every moral
code known to the. world; and practical
outcome of liie second great commmd
ment.
There should never be a guest in the
house whose presence requires any con¬
siderable change in the domestic econo
ray.
However much the circumstances of
business or mutual interests may demand
in interta’uiing a stranger, he shou d neV'
er be taken into the family circle unless
he is wholly worthy of that sanctum
sanctorum of social life ;. biit when once
a man is admitted to the home fireside
he sir. uld be treated as if tlie place had
been his always.
I he fact of an invita'iofi gives neither
host nor guest tlie i ight to be master of
the other's time, and does not require
even a temporary sacrifice of one’s entire
individuality or pursuits.
A man should never be so much hi nn -
•self as wlien hie entertains a friend.
To stay at a friend’s house beyond the
t*me for which one is invited is to perpe¬
trate h social robbery.
To abide uninvited in a friend’s house
is as much a misdemeanor as borrowing
his coat without his permission. It is
debasing the coin of fr’endslnp to mere
dross when a man attempts to make it
pay his hotel bills.
'Tlie fact of two men having the same
occupation and interest in life gives to
neither a social right to the other’s bed
and board, A traveling minister I IMS iio
more right to go uninvited to a fellow
preacher's house than a traveling shop •
keeper or shoemaker has to go uninvi¬
ted to tlie house of his fellow cratlsmafi.
Men are ordained to the fninistery as
preachers; teachers and pastors,’ and not
as private hotel keepers.
They who go into the country in suifi
mer as uninvited guests of their fanner
friends should he rated, as social brig¬
ands, and treated accordingly.
These few social maxims are by no
means to be taken as a complete code of
laws. Others quite as important will
spring up out of the personal experience
of every reader of this article, arid tlie
justice and equity of all may be tested
by that infallible sfrindard of society—
the golden rule. There can be no true
hospitality that in practice is ai violation
of this rule ; and you may safely rest as¬
sured that you have given the fullest and
most perfect measure of entertainment
to your neighbors if you have done ex¬
actly as you would be done by .—Sunday
Afternoon.
Tiis Printer’s Estate,— The prin'er’s
dollars—where are they f A dollar here,
a do! ar there,’ scattered over numerous
small towns rill over the country, miles
and miles ripart—how are they to be
gathered together ? The printer will
have to gef up an address to these wide¬
ly scattered dollars like the following :
“Dollars, quarteris, halves and dimes,
and all manner of fractions’ into which
ye are devided, collect yourselves and
come home. Ye are wanted ! Collect
yourselves, for valuable as you are in the
aggregate, single you will riot pay the
cost of gathering. Come in here in sin¬
gle file, that the printer may form you
into a battalion, arid send you forth again
to battle for him and vindicate his ered<
it/ Reader, are you sure vod havn’t a
couple of printer’s dollars sticking about,
your old clothes?
The Guinea Fowl.—T his species of
poultry is poorly appreciated,' but in our
judgment is to the poultry yard what the
cow pea is' to the plantation crops, cheap,
productive and profitable. Cheap, be*
cause they roari) far and wide, and thus
feed themselves and require no care.—
They are comparatively wild, very watch¬
ful of danger, hence can’t be caught by
‘varmints,’ in day time or at night. In
fact, they are the best kind of watchdog,
for if an owl/or other kind of ‘Varmint,’
or a human thief come about at night,
the guineas are the first to know the fact
arid are suie to give the alarm. Their
y le1 ^ of eggs is astonishing, one hert will
ls v "P^ards of two hundred in a season ;
-
two dozen bens would fnrnish a small
* atnb y ,n meat. Their flesh is good to
eaL L T on the wholp ’ lbej ^ e is l ,robabl 7
raore mone y in a guinea ^ 6lUt
fowl.
What kind of essence does a young
man like when he pops the . question? .
Acqaiessews©;
TWO BOLL AES Per Annum
A Puzzled Justice* —A man named
Josh was brought before a country
squire for stealing a hog, and three wit
nesses being examined, swore they saw
him steal it
A wag having volunteered his counsel
for Josh, knowing the scope of the
scjuile’s brain, arose and addressed him
as foil ows :
Uvlay it pleas yer honor; 1 can establish
this man’s honeltv beyond the shadow of
a doubt, tor 1 have twelve wriness who
are ready lb sweiir that they did not see
him steal it,’
The squire rested his head for a few
moments as it in deep thought and with
great dignity arose and brushing back
his hair, said :
‘It there lire twelve who did not see'
him steal it, and only three who did, I
discharge the prisoner.'
The Barnwell People is of the opin¬
ion that tlie farmer who crawls out of
bed at 8 o’clock, eats a poor breakfast,
and then goes fishing or hunting, or to
the village corner to talk, politics, drink
whiskey and rail against the State as no
farming country, who takes no [tapers
and condemns book farming, and threat
ens to move to Texas of California to
get revenge on the State that will not
give him a good living without work; is
a dead weight upon the fainting inter
ests of any country.
Kufep Borax in the House.— Tn the
laundry it is economical, sis it saves both
labor and soap, arid is really cheaper
than the latter. For blankets and other
large articles it is especially valuable,
and in all cases the use ol a little borax
will save half the labor when thd articles
are mucli soiled. It is perfectly effeetd
ai in driving away red ants, cockroaches;
etc,, if sprinkled around on shelves or
put in the fun-ways ot the insects. Bo
rax is also of great value for toilet uses.
For removing dandruff and cleansing
the hair it is unequaled.' It is also a
good retriedy for rough face . and chap¬
ped hands. Its application to wounds,
sores; bruises, sprains, eld. proves very
salutary, and is often the only remedy
required; even in severe eases,
--
Benjamin Godfrey and Mollie Win
age,"ot nedger, lovers, 1 neither over 18 years of
Norfolk, had a trifling quarrel.
It was on Sunday, and that evening she
refused to let him accompany her home
from church. lie went to a barroom,
got drunk, went to her house,' shot her
through the heart, and then killed him¬
self. Both belonged to wealthy lami
lies.
At twenty you know every tiling,’ at
thirty you have your doubts, at forty
there are some things you don’t know at
fifty you are sure of your ignorance,’ and
after that you read Mr. Beecher’s sermon
on everlasting punishment and hope he
is right. — [Boston Courier.
An exchange says the married la’dies
of a Georgia cit y have formed a ‘Come
Horrie- HiisbancLCiub.’ It, is aboutTfour
feel long arid has a brush on the end of
it
Prince Albert,'of Englaud, insisted that
each of his sons slioii’d be taught a U'ade,
so that if necessity arose they might earn
their own living. The Prince cf Wales
is a good shoemaker, the Duke of Edin*
burg can make his own clothes, and
Prince Artbui is a very fan* carpenter
Sensible man, the Prince Consort.
IIufRS Wanted eoT a Million Doris
Lars.— An advertisement in the sun
from the Brittish Consulate in Baltimore
indicates several points of somewhat 10 -
inantic interest. In 18'7G, in England,
the widow ot Gen. Roht; Blake died,
leaving an estate of over $1,000,000 to
fall into the lap of heirs who are yet to
turn up, and who, there is a probability,
may be traced to early residents' of BaU
timore. Gen. Blake died in Suffolk.
England, in 1850. There fs some doubt
whether he left a will, but his widow re
msiaed in posesston of the entire estate
from bis death until her death, in
If thete was a will leaving it to her, then
her heirs are the parties entitled , other¬
wise it will go to the heirs of Gen.' Blake.
Mrs. Blake was Miss Helen Sheridan,
daughter of Wm. Le Fanu Sheridan,
formerly of Baltimore, who came from
Galway, Irelafid, in 1871, leaving the
daughter Helen in England, where she
married. The nearest relatives of Mrs.
Blake are the ffescendents, if any, of her
mother, Mrs. Sheridan, by a second mar¬
riage. Richard Brinsley Sheripan is sta¬
ted to have been a connection of the
family.—[Baltimore Sun.
A Schenectady girl at a spelling
school sat down on ‘paniloons.’ That
happens here often, and yet it neVer gets
into the papers.
N(1; 18 • -
‘All women are angels before marriage,
and that is the reason why their bus
bands so soon wish them in heaven af
tefward.’
Thus spoke Murpliey’s sweetheart to
him the other night: ‘If you intend to
hug me don't do it suddenly, because tho
chair you are sitting on has a broken legj
and you might get a tumble,’
‘This is what I call wlien capital jiunish^
ment? remarked a boy his mater¬
nal protectcr shut him up In the closet
with the preserves.
It is well enough to hang up a chromd
with ‘God Bless Our Ilome’ on it, blit
it will do no harm fo help.on the matter
by a little less fretting, great V
man
people won’t ask the Lord little to do lingers what tliey
lift up tlieir to do
tliemselves.
Good morning said a compositor to
the head of a flourishing family; ‘have
you any daughters. who would make
good type setters ?’ ‘No, but I have a
wife that would make a Yery good dev—
il.’
A spread-engle orator of New YorK
wanted the wings of a bird to fly to eve
ry village and hamlet in the broad land ;
but wilted wlieh a naughty boy in the
crowd sang out, 'You’d be shot for &
goose before you had flew a half a mile.”
An Iowa than served four years in
state prison, and then it was ascertained
that he tvas innocent of tlie crime .cnar- cb
g u d. The legislature gave jiiifi ^fteetl
hundred dollars and his liberty.
According to the Rome Coimef some
persons are proposing to hold a fail* in
l ^ la !' nex 'f Ob on tbe pool system)
T l) at is, let the person entering the best
bushel of corn, as an example, take the
Pn tire amount df corn entered. A good
pf an > we think,
We never have a fo^iriotrow; it is
simply a world of prophecies. It has
been said that the two pleasures of liv¬
ing are in having something to love, and
SOI bathing to hope for, and the last of
these is ever before us in the promise of
‘to-morrow.’ To-morrow we may not
know, and it is as well it is thus ordain-*
ed to be, for beyond tlie invisible veil that
comea ^ s Mive its coining joys find SOfH
vovvs > GUl ' * aii cy may revel only id what is
k euu *MM and fail, nor see the gloom or
fllc shadows a th coming at; could trials anticipate and worldly nU
V on j\ we as
ed realities that were certain to come,
would mar all our peace ailfe enjoy ment
of the present. It is well for ris that we
cannot withdraw the veil which hides
our future.
A Baby Weighing One Hundred
Pounds— On last Monday there arrived
at the Olive Street Hotel Mr. Henry
Henderson, a vyelLto-cfo f irmer of St.
T rancois county, Mo., with his wife and
infant boy. The latter,' though only
thirteen months old, tips the scales at
one hundred pounds, rind in spite of iris
monstrous baby. It weight, is a handsome, healthy
is perfectly formed in every
respect. A number of leading physici
ans called to see tlie infant prodigy and
pronounced it one of trie wonders of the
age. 'The mother of the boy is a rerriark
ably fine looking lady of forty, arid is the
mother of eight children. Before leav¬
ing the city the parents expressed their
intention of exhibiting their giant .baby
to the public at an early day, —St. Louis
Lost, March 21.
Why ladies sire called ducks : Because
they ate not tame. Because there w
a S°°d deal of sport to be got out of the
w ^d ones. Because they may be cap
tured: Because they may bt sold. Be
Cause » as F°v erf by the'results of the
public examinations, they may lie pluck
Because, as we can see in the illu3s
trated newspapers, they may be drawn.;
Because they may be beautifully done, a
S ood deal cf buttcr bein S uauafly era,
l )X °y ed in the P rocess ‘ because they are
al ' va > rs drc88ed ln some fasWon for din “
ne, ‘ 3iecause th ^ hdVe lou - b,lh
catf f e there is always plenty of them in
rnl *het.
A stranger seeing ari Irishman leaning
against a post, watching a- funeral pro¬ nt
cession coining out of a brick house
bis side, spoke to him, when the follow*
ing dialogue ensued : “Is that a funer*
alf “Yes, sir; I’m thinking it is? ‘Any.,
body of distinction T “I reckon it is/
sir.” “Who is it that died T “the geu
tleman in the rioffiD, sir.’
According to the pastoral addresses of
successive Protestant Episcopal Convene
lions, “gambling.’ “horse racing? “pub¬
lic balls” arid “theatres” have been de¬
clared by that church to be objectiona¬
ble, and have been forbidden to commu¬
nicants;