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Morning Km Building Savannah. Ga.
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UASTERJ OFFICE, 23 Park Row,
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ISDEX 10 m ADVERTISEMENTS.
Meetings—Stockholders Savannah, Flor
ida and Western Railway; Solomons'
Lodge No. 1, F. & A. M.
Special Notices—Savannah Buiidtng
Supply Company; Andrew Hanky Com
pany; Walter W. Sheppard, Attorney at
Law; Suwanee Springs Hotel; Notice, Mrs.
L. C. Gcrken; Notice as to Saiurflays'
Closing, S. Guckenheimer’s Sons; A. C.
Oecschig, Florist; First Floor of Old
State Bank Building for Rent, Southern
Bank of the State of Georgia.
Business Notices—Harvard Beer; Warm
Weather Jewelry, R. Van Keuren & CO.
Auction Sale—Great Sale of Lots To
day by C. H. Dorsett, Auctioneer.
Administrator’s Sale—By 1. D. La Roche,
Auctioneer.
Legal Notices—Petition for Incorpora
tion of Lippman Drug Company.
Hotels—Hote) Victoria, New York.
Watches—Waltham Watches.
Electric Paste—Steam’s Electric Paste.
Grape-Nuts Food—Posturo Ceral Com
pany.
Whiskey—Old Quaker Rye Whiskey;
Murray Hill Club Whiskey.
Medical—Dr. Kilmer's Swamp Root; Mo
Blree’s Wine of Car did; Peruna; Castorta;
Dr. Hathaway Company; Tutt's Pills;
World's Dispensary Preparations; Dr.
Taft’s Asti" t:e; Dr. W. N. Van Bred
erode Fevet ,ue Medicine.
Cheap Column Advertisements—Help
Wanted; Employment Wanted; For Rent;
For Sale; Lost; Personal; Miscellaneous.
The Weather.
The Indications for Georgia and East
ern Florida to-day are for partly cloudy
weather, light variable winds.
Postmaster General Smith has given
up the lease of his residence In Wash
ington and gone to live at a hotel. This
has started the rumor that he will prob
ably retire from the cabinet at no dis
tant day.
Llpton is playing in hard luck. It is
now thought that Shamrock II will have
to be practically remodeled. Designer
Fife ia no doubt getting some satisfac
tion out of the situation, but It is safe
to say Designer Watson is not enjoying
it.
In Minnesota a law designed to equalize
the taxation on mortgaged property has
been passed. It reduces the taxation of
mortgaged real estate to the owner’s equi
ty )n it, and provides that the mortgager
and the mortgagee may agree as to who
shall pay the tax on the mortgage.
The Wisconsin Legislature has passed
an odd vaccination law. It exempts all
persons who have religious scruples
against vaccination. Such a law is use
less. of course, since a few families
“with scruples” might serve to defeat the
whole purpose of the vaccination law.
The announcement Is made that C. W.
Morse, the multi-millionaire organizer and
head of the Ice trust, of New York, is
to be married to an Atlanta. Ga., di
vorcee "of great beauty and wealth."
Isn’t it a little singular, by the way, that
only those who are great, rich, handsome,
talented, beautiful, etc., get married? In
the case of the man. he is always distin
guished above his fellows, and in the case
of the woman she Is one' of the most
beautiful and accomplished of her sex.
No plain people ever go to the marriage
altar; but lots of them become mighty
ordinary afterwards.
If reports are correct, an odd sort of
syndicate has been formed in Ht. Louie.
Its purpose is to raise $200,000 for the de
fense of Albert T. Patrick, who Is in
prison In New York, charged with having
murdered William M. Rice for the pur
pose of securing his estate, worth sev
eral millions of dollars. Should tbe syn
dicate succeed In securing the acquittal
of Patrick, it would. It 1s said, handle the
Rice property. The promoter of the syn
dicate Is credited with believing implic
itly In the Innocence of Patrick, and that
the old man Rice actually willed Patrick
his property.
The brightest of all the bright, partic
ular stars In New York and Washington
aoclety these days Is Harry Lehr, who
is next month to be married to Mrs. John
Vinton Dahlgren, a blue-blooded beauty
and heiress formerly of Philadelphia. A
lew years ago young Mr. Lehr went to
New York as a wine drummer, with only
his face and his wit as his fortune. His
tact and wit commended him to Mrs.
As tor, and she made him her protege;
since which time his successes have been
phenomenal. The lady he is to marry is
worth $10.000,000, and at the wedding he
will have a galaxy of millionaires, con
sisting of Clarence Mackay, W. K. Van
derbilt, Jr., George J. Gould, O. H. P.
Belmont, Thomas B. Wanamaktr and
John Jacob As tor, as the ushers.
EJI.I.AJ'n’t MIGHT.
When Premier Salisbury went to the
! South of France a few weeks ago the
English newspapers expressed the opin
ion that he was not long for this world.
It was said that he was suffering from
Bright's disease in its worst form. He
returned a day or two ago and. it seems,
he is looking brown and hearty and ts
more bellicose than he has been at any
time since the beginning of the South
African war.
He made a speech on Monday night at
the banquet of the Nonconformist Union-
ist Association. Ip the course of his re
marks he said: "The war in South Africa
has shown the strength of England, which
was never more conclusively shown.
There is no Power in the worid but now
knows that If It defies the might of Eng
land. it would defy one of the moat for
midable enemies it could encounter.”
It may he that it appears to Lord Sal
isbury that England has shown wonder
ful strengih in South Africa, but to an
outsider it does not seem that she has
accomplished such wonderful things
there. It is true that she has shown
ability to transport a great army thous
ands of miles across the ocean and a
long way into Africa, and to main
tain it there, but It cannot be said that
this great army has accomplished won
ders. It has been nearly two years try
ing to conquer two little republics, that
at no time have been able to put into
the field one-fourth as many men as Eng
land has sent against them. And the war
is still going on. Of course England will
triumph in the end, but at what a cost!
Only recently (he British minister of
finance declared in a speech in the House
of Commons, that the war had brought
Great Britain to the verge of financial
ruin.
Some allowance must be made for the
fact that the Boers are fighting on theii
own toil, and in defense of their homes,
but even taking that into consideration it
dors not appear that England has done
anyt.nng to make the great Powers of
the wtrld tremble at her might. Evident
ly Lord Salisbury was desirous of say ng
s- melhing to cheer up the English peo
ple. Suppose England nad attacked the
Ln'ted States instead of the little Soutn
Africbn republics! Would the war have
lasted two years, and would the English
have felt Justified in making the
boast he made in his speech last Mon
day right? It is doubtful.
THE GREENE AND GAYNOR CASE.
It took a long time to get a decision
from the Unfted States Court for the
Southern District of New York as to
whether Mr. B. D. Greene and the Gay
nors were to answer In Savannah the
indictment found against them in the
United States Court for this district. Now
that it is known they are to stand trial
here it would be interesting to know
when the trial is to take place. It is
hardly probable that the date will be
earlier than some time in the fall. There
is every reason for thinking that the
trial will be a long one. The Judge will
not want to give the greater part of tbe
summer to it.
The chances are that it will begin some
time in October. In that event, if it
drags as the Carter court-martial did, It
will last until well along towards Christ
mas.
There will undoubtedly be a good deal
of skirmishing before the defense an
nounces ready for trial. It Is probable
that tho indictment will be attacked on
the ground that there was something ir
regular in the drawing of the grand Jury
which found it. And It may be that ef
forts will be made to get a change of
venue on the ground that there is preju
dice against the defendants in this com
munity. These, however, are only spec
ulations. Nothing definite is known as to
what course the accused parties will take
in defending themselves.
There Is of course much interest felt
in the case, but more in the probable out
come than in the testimony! that will he
given. About every point of real interest
was brought out in the hearing before the
commissioner in New York. Whatever
additional testimony the government has
Is of an accumulative character.
There has been a great deal of spec
ulation as to what the effect of an ac
qultal tfrould have on the case of Mr.
Carter, who has been making strenuous
efforts to get out of the Leavenworth
prison. It Is a safe prediction that If
Greene and the Gaynors were declared not
guilty after a full and fair hearing he
would be pardoned, and given a chance
to clear himself in a trial of the Indict
ment pending against him in the court
in this district.
SAD TIME. FOR THE INVESTOR.
The outlook for the Innocent investor
In the stock of oil wells at Beaumont,
Tex., is not encouraging. There have
been fortunes made there, and It is prob
able there will be other fortunes made,
but very little, if any, money will be
made by those who have put their money
In the numerous oil companies organized
to sell stock.
It is alleged that of the three hundred
companies which have been incorporated
not ninety percent will ever pay a divi
dend. Each of them owns more or less
land, hut the lands of many of them
are probably not within miles of the oil
territory. And they did not ebst much,
but they were capitalized high. The pro
moters of the purely speculative com
panies never had any purpose of getting
oil. Their intention was to sell stock In
the companies they organized and then
let the stockholders find the oil.
It is said that in all parts of the coun
try. but particularly in all parts of
Texas, widows and other people of small
means have invested in oil companies
which will never yield a dollar to those
who own shares In them. The investors
are beginning to understand this, and
there is therefore a great deal of weeping
and walling on the part of those who
have parted with their savings in the
hope of getting rich quickly. The most of
those who have made fortunes out of the
oil excitement are the ones who have put
Into their pockets the money of the seam
stress and the servant, the widow' and
orphan and the small farmer and the me
chanic. There ought to be laws enacted
preventing such compaies, as some of
those at Beaumont from selling stock be
yond the amount needed for the develop
ment of the land which they claim to
own. Texas was so earnest In protecting
bar people against trusts, that it would
seem as If some of her law makers would
have provided protection for her people
.against speculative oil companies.
THE MORNING NEWS: THURSDAY. MAY 16, 1901.
THE ARMY ON A PEACE BASIS.
If U had not been for the Spanish-Amer
i lean war the regular army would still
consist of less than 30,000 men. And it
might not have been increased for many
years. The chances are that i>t would not
h3ve been increased until a war made a
larger army necessary.
Now the regular army on a permanent
peace basis is to consist of one soldier to
each one thousand inhabitants. It will
have a strength of 77.287 enlisted men. It
is assumed from the order that has been
issued that it will be increased as the
population increasee.
To maintain the army will cost at least
three times what it cost before it was de
termined to go to war with Spain for the
purpose -of liberating Cuba from her
rule. It will be seen therefore that
helping Cuba to independence, was a cost
ly undertaking for the United States. The
outlay has already been nearly $700,000,000,
not taking into account the thousands of
lives that were sacrificed and the thous
ands of men who have been made invalids
for the remainder of their days.
And the expense of that war is not fully
known yet. There are many millions of
dollars of claims pending which when ad
justed the United States will have to pay
and the payments for pensions will
amount to other millions.
We have Porto Rico and the Philippines,
and Cuba is to have her independence,
hut it is doubtful if the trade of all of
the possessions we gained will be suffi
cient to pay the interest on the cost of the
war. Still, in a matter of this kind the
money question and the trade question
are not all of the questions that are de
serving of consideration. In consequence
of the war the Cubans will have greater
prosperity and happiness and so will the
Porto Ricans and the Filipinos. After all,
probably, the money that was spent by
the United States in the Spanish-Ameri
clan war was well spent. (
A MAI* OF BANK BURGLARIES.
The American Banker, in a recent issue,
presents an article on bank burglaries in
the United States, with,a map illustrating
the distribution of them. From the map it
aopoars there is a bank burglary belt in
t.ie country, just as there is a wheat belt
and a cotton belt. The center of the area
of burglaries is Illinois, and the area ex
tends from Ohio to Kansas and frotn Mis
souri to Minnesota. During the past
live years there have occurred thir
ty-five successful bank robberies in
Illinois, ten In Indiana, seventeen
in Ohio, ten in Michigan, nine in
Wisconsin, seven in Minnesota, eighteen
in lowa, seventeen in Missouri, eigheen
in Nebraska and twenty-four in Kansas.
The burglaries in the other states have
boon very few indeed, with the N;w Eng
land states practically exempt.
It is worthy of especial note that there
was only one attempted bank burglary in
a city of more than 50,000 population. That
exception was in Portland, Ore. To such
perfection has the system of protection
to banks in the cities been brought, with
their immense vaults, armed waicninen,
electric alarms, etc., that would-o© burg
lars let them severely alone. To attempt
to raid one of them, after the manner of
tho famous old Jimmy Hope, would bo
hardly short of suicidal. The burglars,
therefore, give their attention to country
banks almost wholly, where there are no
armed watchmen, where streets are not
peopled to any extent at late hours of the
night, and where the safes used are not of
the elaborate patterns to be found in the
city banks.
The especial enemies of the country
banks are what Robert Pinkerton calls
“yeggmen.” The name comes frotn John
Yegg, a California tramp who turned
bank burglar. The class is recruited from
village loafers, tramps and bums. They
have not the capacity for what is known
as high-class work in the safe-cracking
line, but they have skill enough to pour
nilro-glycerine Into the crack of a safe
and touch it off with a fuse; and that Is
their favorite method of operation. They
are, too. usually desperate enough, when
detected, to fight to kill, as has been
shown in a number of bloody encounters.
During the past five years It is believed
that nearly nine out of ten of the coun
try bank burglaries have been the work
of "yeggmen," or low-class criminals.
• The high-class bank burglars have done
but little work, no doubt finding it more
profitable to employ their talents in other
lines of the "science of abstraction, or
drawing out.” as a famous thief once
characterized his profession. The largest
"haul” made In any bank burglary during
the past five years was $18,169 from a
Lima, 0., bank. The smallest was $2.
The average was about $2,500.
The Crugers of New York are of the
old Knickerbocker blood. That, however,
does not save them from some of the
follies of tho plain people. Some time ago
James P. Cruger disagreed with the wife
of his brother. William J. Cruger, with
respect to a matter of fact. "You lie,
and you know you lie!” said James P.,
ungallantly, to Mrs. W. J. No sooner
were the words out of his mouth than
the good right fist of Mrs. W. J. shot
out and took James B. fair in the face. It
was a good blow, well delivered; so well.
Indeed, that James did not make any
more remarks respecting the lady’s ve
racity. Subsequently William J. Cruger
died, and in his will left James P. the
munificent sum of $lO, and the pugilistic
wife $2,000,000. It may be this latter
matter that induced James P. to tell In
open court how he had called his sister
in-law a liar, and how she had pounded
him for It.
And now the trust has reached out to
win extra dollars from the fruit of the
labor of the hens. A combine was formed
In Kansas City the other day whereby
the entire egg output of Kansas, Okla
homa. Indian Territory and Southwest
Missouri will be controlled. This is said
to be one of the greatest egg-producing
sections of the country. The prices to
be paid for eggs will be fixed by the
trust, as well as the prices at which they
are to be sold. Producers will be pinch
ed on one side and consumers on the
other.
Prof. Weir of the School of Pedagogy,
New York, told a meeting of Methodist
preachers In that city the other day
why It was that so much was heard of
Christian Science. Among other things
he said: “If some of the old maids, who
prefer it. could only get married and
have a lot of children, we would heur less
of Christian Science. There are always
a lot of Ignorant persons, more especially
women, who hope to get a reputation lor
culture by taking up some fad."- ■- 1
The oil strike in Texas is going to prove
a bonanza for the lawyers. Already there
is a mass and tangle of litigation. Many
titles are faulty, and transfers have been
made with such rapidity and so much
carelessness that actual ownership is
sometimes a most difficult problem. The
courts, as well as the markets, will there
fore be full of oil for some time to come.
Ex-Gov. Hogg, who is a lawyer as well
as an investor, is said to be. right up to
the eyes in business, receiving legal fees
as well a3 profits from his investments.
If he does not come out many times a
millionaire, his admirers will be very
much surprised.
A Pennsylvania priest has declared It
as a solemn truth, from his pulpit, that
German girls and Irish boys should not
get married to each other. “German Is
German, and Irish is Irish," he said.
and they won’t mix. Even if the man
and wife are getting along well togeth
er, there will be bickerings in the fami
lies on each side until finally the man
and wife will be casting up things to
each other, and then trouble will come.”
By way of a clincher the priest conclud
ed that he W'ould "almost as soon’’ mar
ry a member of his congregation "to a
Protestant as to a Catholic who is not a
German.”
PERSONAL.
" rector of St. George's, a fashion
able church in Brooklyn, has deemed It
necessary to issue a circular in which ne
announces that in future “audible court
ship will not be permuted In his church
while service is in progress. He does not
particularly object to such mild forms of
expressing affection as the holding of
hands, but the more strenuous manifes
tations must be reserved for less public
places.
—Col. James Hamilton Lewis of Wash
ington had a large audience at the Riggs
yesterday afternoon, says the Washington
Post of Monday. He came in from (he
Souto, where he has been on a short trip,
and signed his name in large characters
across the register. Shortly afterward he
wandered Into the parlor, where a lady
was playing sacred music on the piano,
and the Colonel rendered several solos in
a sweet but powerful baritone. The lobby
of the hotel was rapidly depopulated, and
the audience assumed the proportions of
a Sunday morning church service. Col.
Lewis, who has grown retund since he
stepped out of politics and started earn
ing phenomenal legal fees, unembarrassed
by the sudden assembly, sang with great
fervor, but declined several appeals to
render some sentimental songs, like
"Long, Long Ago.” and "Dearest. I Love
Only You.” clinging to music more ap
propriate for the day.
BRIGHT BITS.
—"Why Is Justice pictured as a woman
holding a pair of apothecary’s scales?”
"I don't know, but It would be manl
festly absurd to present her as an Iceman
with an iceman’s scales.”—Philadelphia
Times.
—Brain Rest—“ What is it you like so
much about golf, Mr. Noodler?”
"Why. you know, it makes me think of
something to talk about—you know, with
out having to think up something to talk
about—you know.”—Chicago Record-Her
ald.
—Might Borrow One—“ Poor old Habuln,
he hasn't a single relatfve in the world
under twenty years of age."
“I don’t see as that’s so sad.”
"You don’t? Why, what's he going to
do for an excuse to go to the circus?”—
Philadelphia Evening Bulletin.
—Widowed Father (to his ten-year-old
daughter)—"Do you know, Minnie, that
your governess is going to get married?”
Minnie—"l’m so glad to get rid of the
hateful thing—l was afraid she was never
going to leave us. Who Is she going to
marry?"
Widowed Father—"Me.”-Tlt-Blts.
—A Serious Complaint.—" What made
you leave yoh place wif dat gemmon?”
asked Mise Miami Brown. "Didn’t he pay
you right?”
"Yes,” answered Mr. Erastus Pinkley.
"He paid fus rate. But his clothes was so
out o' style dat I was almost foheed to
keep out o' society.”—Washington Star.
—Tried! to Please Her.—Mistress: "I’d
Just like to know what was the meaning
of a.ll that loud and angry talking down
stairs last night.”
Domestic—" That was just me and my
husband, mum"
"Your husband? You told me when you
came that you were not married."
"I wasn’t then. mum. but you complain
ed about havin' so much love-makin' in
th’ kitchen, so I married one of ’em.”—
New York Weekly.
CTHRHJiT COMMENT.
The New York Journal of Commerce
(Ind.) says: “Selling: fleets is a business
in which Englishmen are acquiring con
siderable experience. The Inman and
Leyland lines were bought by Americans;
a line on the Pacific was bought a year
ago by the North (German Lloyds, and
the Atlas Line has now been bought by
the Hamburg-American Company. We<k>
not apprehend that Englishmen are think
ing of retiring from the sea: Britannia
will continue, to have a good deal of in
fluence with the waves, even if her au
thority falls somewhat short of rule. But
it is a striking thing that at the same
moment British shipping interests And
themselves confronted by competition
with two countries, the maritime inter
ests of both of which are of rather re
cent evolution. It may be noticed in pass
ing that this competition does not come
from France, Italy or Austria, the na
tions which are making the greatest ef
forts, and with the least results, to in
crease their shares of the ocean-carrying
trade."
The Philadelphia Press (Rep.) says:
"Mr. J. Pierpont Morgan to-day comes
about as near being an earthly special
providence as any man living. No finan
cial sparrow falls without his watchful
eye. He holds up the New York market
by cable end saves the London Exchange
with an opportune eupply of Northern
Pacific. Steamship lines he carries In the
hollow of his hand and a billion dollar
steel trust la to him a very little thing.
He goes to and fro through all the earth,
or that part of it which has stock tickers,
and where he Is is Just nt present the
center of the stage. The German Kaiser
is not in it. If anything were to happen
to the world, what would Mr. J. Pierpont
Morgan do?”
The Chicago Chronicle (Dem.) says:
"Has It ever occurred to the ministers
and W. C. T. V. women to obtain a poll
of the soldiers themselves us to the re
sults of the anti-canteen law? The aver
age bluecoat who nurses a swollen head
ill the guardhouse after pay day, with its
resultant jamlwrec, and turn* his empty
pocket* Inside out Is perhaps ns well
qualified to give an opinion as the the
orists who study the question from a
lofty moral standpoint."
The Charleston Post (Dem.) thus quotes
and comments: "The Washington Post
says ‘Senator McLaurtn Is but trying to
introduce automobile politics' In ‘an os
cart state.' Tile Senator should organise
a political good road association ui con
nection with his movement."- .
The “Lost Cane" in Samoa.
From the South Pacific—from Samoa—
comes a curious, pathetic story of devo
tion to the “Lost Cause,” and even the
least susceptible reader must wonder who
the unknown ex-Confederate was and
what was 'his history, says the Saturday
Evening Post.
The Samoans are experts at rowing and
palling—from which fact Bougainville, the
French discoverer, called their country
the Navigators' Island—and since the ad
vent of the white man every Samoan
boat must have its flag. Just what the
flag represents is not so important a
question.
Sitting in the cool of his porch over
looking the bay one afternoon during his
term as Land Commissioner, ex-Chief
Justice Chambers of Samoa, saw u boat
approaching the shore flying a flag the
sight of which struck him at once with
peculiar interest. It was none other than
the stars ar.d oars of the Southern Con
federacy. What could it be doing, won
dered he, in the South Pacific—and so
long after Appomattox? He determined
to learn the history of the flag and ge
possession at it.
But, meeting the boat as it landed, he
found the owner by no means willing to
part with his flag. The offer of the
"American chief” to buy it was prompt
ly, though very politely, declined.
Then the justice tried a little diplomacy;
he took the boatman into a store and
bought for him a bolt of calico and then
a kit of mackerel—which delighted the
Samoan, to whom they were luxuries. But
the native still insisted that he could not
part with his flag.
"It would not be right for me to give
it to you,” said he, in such a manner a9
to show that some deep feeling was in
volved.
"But why? Where did you get it? And
why do you value it so highly?" asked
Mr. Chambers.
“Well, I wall tell you,” answered the
Samoan. “A long time ago a man came
to Samoa from far off in America—where
you came from. He was not a Bailor,
but told me he had been a soldier. He
was my friend, and lived! at roy house.
But after a while he got sick; and one
day he said to me:
" ‘Tasi, look in my bag there and get out
my flag, and put it up on the wall where
I can see it.’
"I did so; and he would lie there and
look at it andr look at it. Several days
afterward he grew worse* He called me
to and said:
“ ‘Tasi, l am going to die. I am far
away from my home and my people. This
flag is all I have in the world; you have
been my friend; I give it to you. Keep
it as long as you live. Don’t give it to
anybody—and whatever you do, don't you
ever let a Yankee have it.’
“No, my chief. I cannot part with this
flag—not till I die."
Kidnaped by a Horse.
Frank Ingram, a negro, was tried yes
terday in the Criminal Court at Opelika,
Ala., for horse stealing, says the Anniston
Hot Blast. When placed on the stand he
told the following story, in an earnest,
straightforward manner:
He said lie was passing the stable where
the horse in question was, and seeing the
open gate, he thought he would shut it.
He decided 1 there was no use to close tile
gate if there was no stock inside, so he
looked to see. Seeing the horse there, he
started off to fasten the gate, and: stum
bled against a bridle lying on the ground.
He picked it up and discovered that the
horse was following him. He threw the
bridle at the horse to stop him, and the
'bridle caught on the horse's head, and be
ing one that closed with a snap, it fas
tened.
Realizing that no one would believe that
the bridle would fasten itself, he decided
he would fasten the gate, climb the fence
and flee. This he did, and the horse
jumped the eight-foot fence and pursued
him. He fled in terror, and the horse ran
hint nearly a quarter of a mile. Seeing
that the horse was gaining on him, he
got to one side of he road and squatted
partly down to let the horse pass without
seeing him. The horse ran between his
legs and caught him up on its back and
carried him on, despite his efforts to get
off.
When seven or eight miles from the
stable, he says, the horse became con
jured, and told him that he was going to
throw him off, which was done. That
was the last he saw of the horse.
He told the story in dead earnestness,
while the court officers stood with bated
breath and gaping mouth and listened
with awe at the weird story. The jury,
having no case against the horse for kid
naping the negro, promptly convicted the
negro for the strange ride.
Dishes Slot on the Bill.
He pulled himself up at the hotel ta
ble, tucked his napkin under his chin,
picked up the bill of fare and began to
study it intently, says London Tit Bits.
Everything was in restaurant French, and
he didn’t like it.
"Here, waiter,” he said sternly, "there's
nothing on this I want.”
"Ain’t there nothin’ you would like for
dinner, sir?” inquired the waiter, po
litely.
“Have you got an sine qua non?”
The waiter gasped.
“No, sir,” he replied.
"Got any bona fide?” j
"N-no, sir.” ' 11
"Got any semper idem?”
“No, sir, we haven’t.” i
"Got any Jeu d'esprits?”
"No, sir, not one.” ' "•*_
“Got any tempus fugit?”
“I reckon not. sir.” * 1
"Got any soirees dansantes?”
"No. sir.” f*
The waiter was edging off.
’’Got any sine die?”
“We ain’t, sir.”
"Got any pluribus unum?”
The waiter's face showed some signs of
intelligence.
’’Seems to me I heerd of that, sir,” and
he rushed out to the kitchen, only to re
turn empty-handed.
"Maybe you've got some beef and cab
bage and a gooseberry tart?"
"Sure we have, sir,” exclaimed the
waiter, in a tone of the utmost relief,
and he fairly flew out to the kitchen.
He Got the Money.
A Henly man has a son, aged 8, who
recently clamored for money, after the
manner of small boys, says London An
swers.
"What do you want to do with It?”
asked his father.
"Oh, nothing!” responded the boy In
definitely.
"You have plenty of spending money,
and I buy you everything you need or
ought to want. T’nless there Is some
special reason, X can’t let you have it.
There Isn'fe any reason, is there?"
’’Not exactly; but I want It. You know
how it Is, papa; you were a little boy
once.”
This appeal failed to move the pater's
heart, so the youthful diplomat said:
"Papa, suppose I was to meet a high
wayman In a lonely street late at night."
“Yes, my son.”
"And suppose he should pull out a ple
tol and say. ‘Little boy, your money or
your life,’ what could I do?”
Reflections of n Bachelor.
From the New York Press.
AH roads lead to Rum.
You can never tell, by the slse of a
woman’s waist how big her heart Is.
Ten to one it was a woman’s club that
caused the first murder. Probably Cain
killed Abel with Eve’s churn-dasher.
A woman's graceful walk depends half
on the way the Lord made her and half
on which petticoat she put on that morn
ing.
Love |s like arsenic; if you take a lit
tle It's deadly poison, but If you take a
lot you’ll get. over It and it will only
clean out your system.
ITEMS OF INTEREST.
—An engraving company of New York
issues a sample of miniature engraving
that fs rather an interesting piece of
work, says the Jeweler’s Review. It is a
duplication of the Lord’s Prayer from a
larger design and is engraved on a pearl
button on a space nineteen-hundredths of
an inch wide. In the composition there
are fifteen lines. There are twenty-four
letter spaces, making each letter approxi
mately ten one-thousandths of an inch
high and five one-thousandths of an inch
wide. Notwithstanding the smallness of
the letters, they are as perfectly and ac
curately formed as the letters of the large
original, and It Is even possible for a per
son of keen sight to read the composition
without tiie aid of a magnifying glass.
—Mr. Watson-Armstrong, who has just
presented the Newcastle Infirmary with
£IOO,OOO, Is the great-nephew and heir of
the world-famous inventor of the Arm
strong gun, says the London Sketch. The
late Lord Armstrong, who was justly in
cluded among the nation's Grand Old
Men, for he was 91 years of age, had a
much-loved sister, Anne Armstrong. This
lady, who died very shortly after her
marriage to the late Sir William, Watson,
Baron of the Exchequer, left a son, wljo.
In due course, became the father of Mr.
Watson-Armstrong, who since 1589 has
borne his grandfather's name. Mrs. Wat
son-Armstrong, who Is closely associated
with all her husband's good works, was
a daughter of that famous soldier. Sir
John Adye. She is a clever and charming
W'oman, much loved on Tyneside, espe
cially in the neighborhood of Cragside,
near Rothbury, a lovely place where
Lord spent much time.
—Jokes about dressmakers’ bills have
been threshed out by the comic journals
time out of mind, says the New York Sun,
but a recent report of profits made in the
English newspapers by a well known Paris
establishment, one though by no means
among ihe most famous, would seem in its
Alnaschar proportions to justify them all.
To be sure, it is a report to shareholders,
and Us publication Is in the nature of an
advertisement, but the figures given are
astonishing. The concern started mod
estly in Paris ten years ago, and the
profits of the first year were $3,160; they
jumped in the following four years to the
following figures: $19,000, $63,000, $164,000,
$234,000. It was then thought best to
turn the establishment into a stock com
pany, with lihiited liability, capitalized at
$2,500,000. The profits of the company for
the last four years were $264,000, $296,000,
$327,000 and $413,000; that is to say, $1,300,000
net profits, or more than half the amount
of the nominal capital In four years. One
cause for the amount of business is, per
haps, the practice of giving credit to cus
tomers, the books showing an indebted
ness to the company of $878,000. There is
no doubt that the business is profitable,
and the bills proportionately high.
—A New York plumber was the victim
of a startling error the other day, says
the Philadelphia Record. Having been in
jured in the left side, he applied to a char
ity hospital and was told that an oper
ation was imperative. He was placed un
der the influence of an anesthetic, and
his side was opened and sewed up again.
When the bandages were removed he
found that the right (or rather the wrong)
side bad been opened instead of the left.
The surgeons were dismayed, and offered
to cut into him on the left side; but he
declined. The plumber brought suit
against the hospital authorities for $25,000,
but the court has decided that a claim
on account of negligence or inefficiency
cannot hold against a charity hospital.
This ruling might prove to be a great
hardship to the poor who are compelled to
go to such institutions for surgical treat
ment. If the plumber did not pay for
the' treatment he is not entitled to sym
pathy, since he confessed to an income of
$5,000 a year. The abuse of the free dis
pensaries and clinics of New York by
well-to-do persons has become a scandal,
even a multi-millionaire having been ac
cused of getting medical treatment free.
—London during the past decade has in
creased in population by more than 300,-
000 souls, but the increase has been by
no means evenly distributed over the
twenty-nine metropolitan boroughs, says
the Pall Ma-ll Gazette. Seven of these
have actually declined in population, one
of them, Westminster, by more than 18,-
000, the total decrease amounting to over
06,000. Among these, naturally, one finds
the city, which actually contains less
than 27,000 inhabitants, after business
hours. If you look at the names of the
boroughs where numbers have decreased,
and compare them with those in which
the increase has been the largest—as, for
example, Westminster on the one side
and Wandsworth ou the other—you can
not fail to perceive that the tendency of
the currents of migration is uniformly
centrifugal, that the central districts of
the metropolitan circle are losing their
population, while those at the circumfer
ence are gaining. That, of course, is pre
cisely what might have been expected.
The whole tendency of the age in Lon
don is toward a state of things in which
the central districts will be occupied by
huge shops, warehouses, offices, public ed
ittces, and, in short, by business rather
than residential buildings. Increased fa
cilities of transit by cheap train and
tram services tend to make the transition
easier and more rapid from the old order
to the new. Time was when it 'was an
innovation for the city merchant to live
in the suburbs instead of over his office;
nowadays not only the master, but his
men too, come up to business and go
down of nights by the daily bread train,
and the caretaker alone, the Alexasder
Selkirk of the twentieth century, remains
monarch of all he surveys when office
hours are over. The centrifugal force of
modern conditions is, then, the fact that
strikes us in connection with London life
as revealed by these figures.
—The London Lancet says: “It seems
that sweets are made to glitter by means
of splinters of glass, so that the sweet
has the appearance of consisting of
sparkling crystal sugar. We have in our
laboratory at the time of writing some
specimens of even high-class confection
ery, said to be of French make, which
all contain a liberal sprinkling of glass
flakes. When the sweet Is dissolved in
warm water the flakes tumble to the bot
tom of the fluled into a miniature heap
of broken glass. The flakes present both
sharp points and sharp edges, which are
eminently calculated to cause an Injury
to, or even to perforate, the walls of the
digestive canal. It is difficult to Imag
ine a more powerful mechanical irritant
than Jags of glass which might easily
cause laceration and hemorrhage, not to
mention other disturbances, such as are
set up by foreign bodies less Jagged than
glass, in the alimentary canal. The sweets
to which we have referred were sent to
us by a correspondent with a request for
analysis, and he relates that these sweets
were partaken of by two little children
who shortly afterward suffered from se
vere abdominal pain, in one case In
the region of the appendix. The pain
persisted for several days. The effect of
sharp glassy particles lodging in the ap
pendix could, of course, be easily disas
trous. Our analysis enables us to say
most positively that these glittering par
tides are glass. They are quite unchang
ed in boiling water or In boiling acids,
and they melt into beads at a red heat
On analysis we obtained silica, lime, soda
and a little lead, which are the constitu
ent* of common glass. It Is probable that
the practice la adopted In order to com
pensate for the absence of any crystal
line appearance in glucose, which Is now
so much used as a substitute for cane
sugar In confectionery. In such a case
the practice 1s not only monstrous be
cause it Is likely to lead to serious in
jury to health, but because It Is a fraud
also. Sanded sugar was bad enough, but
to put glass splinters In sweet* * 4a.
fceMest.” |
■ Better Than
f Nostrums^,
, Physicians all con
cede, the beneficial
jBmJ uses of Whiskey in
the treatment of dig.
JMWIL eaae. They also rec
ommend the beet—
IjAMjafiamf pure and unadnlter
ated; hence the
wonderful popularity
Haig Murray Hill
■■ Club—
Whiskey, which for medicinal purposes
has no rival. It possesses all the vir
tues of a stimulating tonic, strength
ning, soothing and pleasant.
CINCINNATI, O.
HOTELS AND SUMMER RESORTS.
three"” mTILION-DOLLAR hotel
ABSOLUTELY FIREPROOF!
PARK AVE. HOTEL,
Park Ave. (4th ave.) 32d to 33d St.,
NEW YORK.
One of Ihe Coolest Hotels in New York
city, having a beautiful
COURT GARDEN WITH FOUNTAINS,
FLOWERS AND MUSIC.
Travelers from the South take 23d street
cross-town cars and transfer to Fourth
avenue cars direct to the hotel.
American Plan, $3.50 to $5.00 per day.
European Plan, SI.OO to $4.00 per day.
REED & BARNETT. Proprietors,
Miller’s Hotel,
37, 39 and 41 West Twenty-sixth Street,
NEW YORK.
This house is located between Broadway
and Sixth avenue, one block from Madi
son Square. It is in the very center of
the shopping, amusement and hotel dis
trict. The Broadway and Sixth avenue
lines of electric cars, with their transfers,
connects with all ferries, railroad depots
and other parts of the city. The house Is
fitted up with all modern conveniences,
and for years has been the home of
many prominent people from both South
and North.
Rates—Single rooms, with board, from
$2 to $2.50 per day. Double rooms, with
board for two, from $4 to $5. Special
terms for a stay of two weeks.
W. M. HAIGHT, Proprietor.
Hotel Victoria
4 Broadway, sth Avenue
nd 27th Street,
NEW YORK
European Plan
In the centre of the shop,
ping and theatre district
Absolutely Flreprool
A Modern First-class Hotel
Complete in all it 9 appoint
ments. Furnishings ana decorations new through
out. Accommodations for 500 guests; 150 suites with
baths. Hot and cold water and telephone in ever*
loom. Cuisine unexcelled.
GEORGE W. SWEENEY, Prop*
THE WINOLA.
This modern hotel is beautifully situa
ted with full lake view on an eminence
of ground overlooking the main body of
water 150 feet away. Pine grove of large
trees surrounds hotel. Orchestra will
furnish music at stated intervals during
day and evening. Cuisine first-class;
rates reasonable. Located on the direct
route to the Pan-American Exposition.
Illustrated booklet and other information
on application. C. E. FREAR, Prop.,
Lake Wlnola, Pa.
Mountain Park Hotel,
HOT SPRINGS, N. C,
The healthiest place in America. Re
duced rates for summer—July I to Oct. 15.
Mineral baths. The medicinal virtues of
its waters are unexcelled. Swimming
pool, riding, golf and tennis. For booklets
address JOHN C. RUMBOUGH, Prop.
Greenbrier White suipnur springs,
WEST VIRGINIA.
The representative resort of the South.
Open June 15. New lights, sewerage, and
private baths. Also sulphur, Turkish,
Russian, and spout baths, in charge of
professional. Orchestra of 15 pieces.
Write for Illustrated booklet. Address,
until June 1, Harrington Mills, Mgr., ths
Grafton, Wasty, D. C.
Fauquier White suipnur Springs. Virginia.
Open June 15. Elegant modern brick
hotel and cottages, with baths and sani
tary plumbing. Fine livery, golf links,
boating and fishing. Large, beautiful
grounds; good orchestra. For booklet,
address, E. B. MOORE,
Ths Savoy, Washington, D. C.
WARM SPRINGS,
Bath County, Virginia,
are now open for guests. For circular*
and terms address
EUBANK & GLOVER.
Warm Springs, Bath county, Virginia.
A CARLOAD OF
GARDEN
TILE
JUST RECEIVED.
hid iomii'B *
113 Broughton Stroet, West.
ASTHMA
HAY FEVER asthmalexe
Send for FREE TRIAL BOTTLE.
Address DR- TAFT. 79 E- 180th et.N.Y 011 "
Cook’s Duchess Tablets *reuce*rtruW
used monthly by over
■MU:. By mail. *1 OK. Wendt cen• h*
af *ampl and particular*. TboCook 00,
W Woodward a?©.. Detroit, Mlcb.
Bold In Savftnnafe at Cubbtd*© • *****
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