Newspaper Page Text
SECOND
HP The Atlanta Georgian
j SECOND
SECTION
AND NEWS
SECTION
£=
yol
vtiT- NO; 249.
ATLANTA, GA., SATURDAY, MAY 21,. 1910.
On Train: FIVE CENTS
jtivav^ * In Atlanta; TWO CENTS.
AN ADDRESS TO WIVES
...By ELLA WHEELER WILCOX...
(Copyright. li»«. by TI 'o New York
Evening Journal Publishing Company.)
To you. madam, thn wlfe-an'd mother,
I address myaelf. You may have no
„.0,J of my remark*; they may not ap-
you. If they do you will know it.
; i,«t)ier you confess It or not. But I
oulte certain you will be able to
think of some one or more of your ac-
iiualntancei to whom they will apply.
1 The tvpa of woman I am writing
shout today exists everywhere. She Is
in the ultra-fashionable circles, she Is
he found over the wash tubs In the
tenements and she prevails largely in
«i,e space between the two extremes,
in the country, where women do their
- ‘ „„ r |,, i have found her numerous
ly and In villages and towns where she
keeps one nr several domestics she also
"h'niakes no difference whether she Is
rich or poor, fortunate or unfortunate.
When a woman has allowed herself to
become a petty tyrant In disposition
.lie will And cause and occasion to ex-
rrrl-e her peculiar talenta to make
everrhodv about her miserable, no mat
ter what "her surroundings. Of course,
selfishness Is st the foot of It. let.
nr,haps vou are a woman who keeps
family miserable mentally, and yet
tell me that you are unselfish.
y„u ,|o the work of a domestic to
sue your husband the expense because
he Is not prosperous In money matters,
and vou do sll tlie sewing for the chil
dren' and vou deny yourself comforts
(,,,- ,1m sake of vnur family In order
mat the husband and children may en-
luxuries, perhaps.
Words Spoil Your Acts,
put my dear madnm. how can they
enjoy' these luxuries when you tell
them twenty limes a week how you
have slaved and saved for their sakes?
Whv have not you the good sense to
see Hint thev would he happier If you
t„.,k life easily and smiled at them and
l-i them work and save for you?
They would rather a thousand times
,1.. this, and see a happy, cheerful face
about the home, and hear loving worda
and hopeful talk, than to see the de
spairing hire you carry about, and to
hear >nur never-ending talc of toll and
sui: Hire.
Vou pretend to be a Christian. I pre
sume. hut the woman who Is always
dtsrriblng hey own good actions, and
uho makes everybody about her utter
ly wretched by her constant reference
her sacrifice* for their sake. Is no
Christian. 'Christ will be ashamed to
„vn her when she geta out of her body.
You say you want your family to ap
pro, late what you are doing, and you
ate obliged to remind your husband
and children of your unselfish labors
and economies or they would take
(hem ns a matter of courae after a
while.
l.et me anawer you. madam* that no-
bodv ever appreciated a favor of "which
Im was reminded every day In the week
lie the doer, ami talk about your fa
vor* to others Is a* had or worse than
forgetting others' favors to you.
Maks Tham Appraelata You.
Hlscontlnue vnur labors for yourfdin-
liy a while If you think the members do
ant appreciate you. dal* down and read
and he cheerful and amiable and affec
tionate. and see how quickly, husband
and children will spring to, your aid.
Tide is a far better way of getting at
tention than by demAhdtng. It. .
The woman' tyrant ha* an Idea that
she must always be first In every way
In the consideration of each member of
her household. I have known her.to
make a scene because her husband sat
for an hour with their daughter and a
sill friend who had Just returned front
hoarding school, white the mother was
writing letters In another room!
Rut she was accustomed to having
her husband come at onee to her side
when he returned from bualnes*.: and
•he considered It a slight and a lack of
proper courtesy when he lingered with
anj.me else, even Ills own daughter, for
an hour.
This is a poor way to keep a man in
love With you. Only ft weak man would
submit m ii. The man I refer to was
not a weak man In any sense save that
he longed for a peaceful home. He
submitted lo his wife's tyranny In »
great degree merely to-keep peace, and
he finally died Insane.
Ii was small wonder. Constant asso
ciation with a tnan or woman who I* .a
petty tyrant wears the brain far more
than n great sorrow or tragedy.
Wearing On the Brain,
The wife who makes herself so ador
'd,iv sweet and charming that a man
prefers her society to that of'an.v other
person never needs to demand his at
tention.
H Is far more flattering to know a
man seeks you because nowhere else
.an he receive such a welcome, such
ihfluthtfulness for his comfort, such
pleasing attentions, or hear such ngree-
oliln conversation, than to glory In the
■nought that you have forced him to
,|w .' you by making a painful scene.
Tit.’ sort of woman who Is alwaya
working herself to death for the physl-
'"I comfort of her husband and chll-
'wen ttnd then ruin* the mental at
mosphere of the home by her moods
and | e r nrbltrary rules, I*. In my esti
mation. far worse than the Indolent
and neglectful mother who lets others
l ea - her burdens, but keeps placid and
go d matured.
I have seen a homo spoiled by a fine
housekeeper and a careful economlier
a "o made the meal hour a time to
dread for every member of the family,
if any one chanced to he ten minute*
I' led fn a lecture bestowed upon
tiie preparation of the repast and the
“It.v of Its being partaken of while
[•***' and Imt, and the Inconvenience
" caused other*—herself or the do-
ja*ftlcs- to have members of the fam-
:* snd so on, and so on, forever,
'■ f Tennyson's brook, until starvation
" ond have been rapture compared to
Spoiling the Family Meal.
Hon much kinder It would have been
, eway the dinner and tell the
aide hoy that he would have to take
’.tat h» could And on hi* return. *a the
fAr dinner was over? Told this
"h a smile, the boy would, have been
mom content with-a eendwlch and .a
f water than with a full course
r served with a tirade of scolding.
" 'on arc a woman of this kind, oh;
' ' m * hog of you to realise that It I*
" * ,w * SOU do for your dear ones
,P i 1 ll, * k ** • home, but It Is how you
’ >’ and what your tone and your
'* oxpress to them, far more than
"at your hands perform.
You Hava Not tho Right.
- Al d I't me tell you another thing,
ym have no right to rp ill the live* of
about you by your whims, your
•rr.iw Judgments, your arbitrary rules
'■our self-centered notions and The
>mi'and Intangible and Indescribable
•a'* which women like you have at
their command for rendering everybody
ftilserable.
What you need Is a good strong mas
ter. A man who will say to you.
“Madam. I married a woman I respect
ed. believing her to be possessed of
good sense and a desire to make me
happy. You are forfeiting my respect,
you are showing very little good sense
and you are rendering me miserable. 1
shall he obliged to take up my quarters
at the club unless you can control your,
self and change your system of tactics.”
It will be weil for you also If your
children make an open revolt against
your petty tyranny and get away from
your control.
It Is perfectly useless for husband or
children to yield to the home tyrant.
The more they yield the more Intol
erant and domineering she will become.
It Is absolutely useless, also, to argue
with her. She Is not amenable to rea
son. The only thing to do Is to take a
quiet, determined stand and maintain
It; and If she continues lo nag and
scold and Irritate, to get away from her
Influence, for there Is no tie of blood or
duty which gives one person the right
lo ruin the happiness of another.
The Nagger Destroys Peace,
And yet everywhere, all about us.
beautiful homes are to be found which
are mere pauper houses, so far as hap
plncss Is concerned, because of some
one member of the family who Is a
petty tyrant, a nagger and a peace de
slroyer.
Sometime* It la the husband and
father, hut no tnan, unless II be an In
valid. ha* the power to mRke or inijr
the home as every wife and mother
ha*.
» I* the providing mentality—the
person w ho Is constantly In the house—
who make* Its spiritual atmosphere.
Thoughts are like odors, and they All
the epace we occupy with their ema
nations.
A woman has the opportunity to so
dominate a home with her sweet, rest
ful. kind, cheering thoughts that she
can overcome the Influence of a crotch
ety man during the few hours he Is
In the house.
One of the most pearful homes I
ever entered was made so by the sun
ny hearted wife of a cross-grained hus
band. The mother’s view of life was
reflected by the children, and In aplte
of an unamlable host guests found the
house full of rest and cheer.
Where ihe wife and mother possesses
the despondent or tyrannical nature,
however, there Is small chance for
hushnnd or children to make the home
anything but a place to sleep. Only
when one Is locked In the arm* of
•Morpheus ls peace to be found under
the roof with such a woman.
And yet these women arc almost
always devout churchgoers, and usually
regarded by their neighbor* as de
voted wives and mother* who are sac
rificing their best Interests for the
sake of an unappreciative family.
It Is only those who dwell under thq
roof with them day after day who re
alise the enormity of their crimes, for
It Is one of the worst crimes In the
calendar to destroy the happlnesa of a
home.
There I* nothing In life for any man
or woman who has an uncomfortable,
discordant home. Wealth, honor and
fame are of no use to one who goes
back to his own roof with dread.
The petty-mtnded woman tyrant In
variably save* all herw-orfles and care*
and bodily aches to talk about upon
the return of husband' or children. In
order that they may appreciate how
much she suffer* for their sakes In her
effort to keep the home together.
She does not realise that a little dust
and disorder In the home could be
borne better than so much mental dis
order os her conversation > Indicates
THE BUTTERCUP MATINEE BONNET
THE SECRET OF HAPPINESS
By=
DOROTHY DIX
No. 5—Keep Busy So
. You Will Not Have
Time To Be Unhappy
The fifth secret of happiness Is to
keep so busy you will not have time
to-know; w hether you are happy or not.
The best way to get rid of trouble Is
to crowd It off the map.. You can't do
two things at once, and It Is physically
Impossible to fret and whine over the
disappointments of the past If you are
hustling after something . that looks
good to you for the future.
It takes leisure In which to he mis
erable, and that la the reason why
women as a class are so much more
melancholy and take ao much more
doleful a view of existence than men
do. The majority of women have lots
of time In which,to sit up with their
fingers on their pulses, counting their
heart beats, and searching their sys
tems for symptoms of unhappiness.
And they always find them.
Men, on the other hand, are mostly
kept on the Jump making a living, and
they haven't a minute lo spare to con
sider whether they are a* Joyful as
they expected to be or not. and the re
sult Is that they are cheerful under
creditable circumstance*.
Why the Men Recuperate.
It la observable, that. In cases of be
reavement In a family, the men recu
perate much more quickly from the
loss of a loved one than the women
Thle Is not because the men are
leea devoted than the women, but be
cause the exigencies of life thrust na
ture)* great panacea—occupation—on
the men, whereas, the women are left
Idle with nothing to do but brood over
their sorrow.
The lesson of all of this Is to get
busy If you would be happy.
If you are a man who hae always
fought an unequal battle with fate and
has gone down In defeat, don’t let
yourself sink Into a querulous, pessi
mistic “knocker." Oet up and try
eomethlng else, and work ao hard at
It that you won't have time to recall
the blows that you have received, nor
even to be conscious of the wounds you
may be getting.
If you arc an old man, too feeble to
work, don't alt down and bemoan the
days of your youth,, and make yourself
a burden to everybody around you by
your lamentations over how much bet
ter things “used to be" than they are
now. Find some Interest In life. Take
up some hobby, and ride It so hard
and fast that the days will go by like
a flash, and you will be gay and cheer
ful company before you know It.
If you are a young girl, discontented
and fretful, because you can't have the
pretty clothes and go to the parties
that richer girls enjoy, cut out the
whining and go to work and make tho
money that you want. The whole field
of labor I* open to you. and you will
And that there Is a lot more fun In
making the money lo buy a new gown
than there Is wearing It.
If you arc a married woman and are
rating your heart out because matri
mony lias proven a failure and your
husband a disappointment. Just try
the work cure for. It for awhile. Turn
off your servant, and roll up your
sleeves and get busy with the kitchen
stove and Ihe broom.
If you will observe, it Is the women
who live In apartment houses and keep
inald* wno And out moat frequently
that their husbands are common, soul
less, material creatures, who are In
capable of appreciating them as do
some long-haired aesthetes or profes
sors. Women who arc kept on the
Jump from morning unlll night cooking
and washing, and scrubbing and mind
ing babies nre not troubled with the
ufllnlty business. They nre too busy-
trying to make the ends meet, and
spread one dollar over the work of
three, to And nut whether their hus
bands come up to their Ideas or not.
If you are a lonely woman, a rich
old maid, or a childless widow, and
life Is os gray and drear to you as a
winter's day, don't waste another hour
mourning over the drearlgess and love-
Icssneas and lack of Interest In your
life. The great work of humanity Is
waiting for you to put your hand to It,
and you can fill >-our days so brimming
over with exciting snd absorbing In
terest* that you will never have leisure
In which lo shed another single tear
for yourself.
There Is settlement work to be done
In the alums, there are little children
to be mothered, there are young girls
to be protected, there Is disease to be
fought, there are rights to struggle for.
They AM Have 8erene Faces.
Did you ever notice the faces of the
women who are engaged In philan
thropic work? They are the serenest,
the most beautiful, the cheerfulest
women that you will see anywhere, and
they are that way because they are
too busy to think about their own little,
petty personal griefs and worries.
The smile that won't com* off la
worn by the hard worker every time.
If you would be happy, keep hus
tling. Fill every hour with eome ab
sorbing occupation. Keep going. Get
excited over something, and before you
know It you will have forgotten that
you were miserable.
Photograph by Underwood A Underwood, Now York.
The charms of the matinee girl have been exploited by pen and pencil from the inception
of the afternoon performances right up to the present. And now comes the camera to prove that
this delightful young person has by no means exhausted her knack of becoming more alluring and
entrancing with the advent of the seasons. Here she is shown wearing the very latest creation
in headgear—the “buttercup” matinee bonnet, a filmy and fetching adornment made of dotted
Swiss muslin with a full crown, fitted to the head by means of a hand of black velvet. Deep
ruffles of lace fall from the bonnet down to ami over the shoulders. The trimming* are ot black
velvet and buttercups. A big bow of the material mingled with the flowers is tied under the
chin. A lace frill finishes the front’edge of the bonnet and lianga in becoming fashion over hair
"HER HIGHNESS, MY DAUGHTER"
...By BEATRICE FAIRFAX...
prompts and life requires and retain a
cheerful and agreeable deportment at
the same time. v
But If on* of the two must be neg-
Not that either Is necessary—there Is! looted, let It alway* he the physlaal
no earthly reason why a woman can I duty. Somebody else can be found who
not perform, all the duties which love I will do that for you; no one else ran be
agrpeahlc ond cheerful for you.
And remember this: You aje not a
good wife or a good mother or a good
Christian, tho you work your hands to
the hone for your hushand and chil
dren and deny yourself comforts for
their sake, If you are complaining,
scolding and making scene* over the
dally annoyance* which occur hi every
houeehold. ,
Unlesa you ore amiable, cheerful, op
timistic and agreeable In. yaur- family,
you arc a bad wife, a bod mother and
n had cltlsen.
The other day I watched a strapping
girl of about twenty pilot her mother, a
frail little old lady of "0 or thereabouts,
across Herald Square.
The mother hung to the daughter’e
arm as the young woman; [plunged
across the street; ‘ “
The old lady looked timidly about
her: It ovldently was a fearsome under
taking,’ tills getting across the car
tracks. Hh* wasn't very spry, for she
was an old, old little lady with bowed
shoulders and unsteady feet.
"Hurry up.” aald the daughter Impa-
Gently; "you've got to be spry If you
want to get arms* the street; you hold
oh to me ao tight that you keep me
back.”
The mother glanced, at her daughter
'linns
SOME CHARMING FASHLON HINTS FOR THE EARLY SUMMER
RICH EVENING GOWN. ” *'
The present fsd of veiling one material with another of different tex-
lure and color Is displaved In this beautiful gown, of classic line*. It Is of
aprTcot mousseline over psle pink liberty. The bodice and deep band on
the*skirt are embroidered In gold. Around the waist Is wrapped a englh
of tinted ribbon. In apricot and pink, one edge of*which I* finished by a
narrow gold fringe. Till* ribbon and a broader fringe are used to produce
Ihe draped tunic effect of the skirt. The fringe edge, the short sljev.s.
The square line of the corsage at the front Is softened hy folds of apricot
chiffon.
A PARISIAN CHAPEAU.
One of the very n*»weat and the
most striking noveltle* of the Parla
season, In matter of headgear, I*
pictured above. The hat, which la
of blaek crln, hna a narrow,-Ir
regular brim, which turn* hack
over a row of •mall, white wing*,
arranged In an upstanding ring
around the crown. The latter fa
high and soft, and does much to
soften the severe effect of the
. nrnnet nf wings. The hat Itself
seta well down over the head, al
most concealing the coiffure bo-
neAth. Bo striking Is the effect of
thla chapeau as to he almost start
ling. hut the design has the two
fold advantage of being direct from
Paris, and being « departure In
the matter **f *lr.o, from the many
monstrosltlen one sees on every
hand—or rather on every head.
rw A LITTLE GINGHAM GOWN.
This design Is presented as a suggestion for a morning frock of ging
ham or other washable material. It* simplicity and cut recommend this
frock. It being so constructed a* to practically prohibit the stretched ami
misshapen appearance which with many frocks frequently follows n tub
bing. The closing of the surplice bodice Is finished by a simple ruffle of
lace and Ihe neck la filled In by a shield of tucked muslin, bordered hy a
band of embroidery. The skirt I* fulled Into a fitted pleee at the feel,
which extend* half way up the front In tabller effect, and In the back be
come* a panel which reaches to the.watst line.
meekly and apologetically, and tried to
hasten her poor old steps. I think she
wa* more afraid of her smartly dressed
young daughter than of all the pushing,
Jostling crowd.
The girl, no doubt, considered that
ah* wa* taking care of her mother, and.-
In a certain sense, she wa*. but her
manner toward the old lady was
brusque and disrespectful to a degree.
About half the girls we meet are
laboring under the Impression that they
know more than their mother*.
Look on Mothers as Old-Faihionad,
They look on their mothers as old-
fashioned and Ignorant, and very often
they are ashamed to bring their friends
home for fear mother or father will say
something “queer.’’
Not one of those girls will ever have
to undergo the hardship* that their
mothers did In their youth, and for that
they are Indebted to their mothers' un
selfishness and hard work.
They need not for a moment believe
that uielr smattering of learning and
fine clothes make them superior to their
mothers.
Any man or woman of Intelligence
would Infinitely prefer the society of
the simple, unaffected old mother to
that of the self-conscious, affected
daughter.
Nothing In the world so prejudices
people against a girl as her failure to
•how her parents proper deference and
respect.
Buppoaing they do make a few mis
takes In grammar and In table man
ners. That gives you no right to be
ashamed of them. Have they not given
you every advantage you have had?
Since »h« hour of your birth your hap
piness and welfare have been their
heart's deslr*.
How Are You Repaying ths Dabtf
One display of lack of reapert on
your part Is far more shameful than
their lapses In grammar or etiquette.
You have taken all their unselfish de-
votlon os your Just due. You owe them
much for all that you have taken for
granted.
Hnw are you repaying the debt? If
you have ah education, who paid for It,
or gave you the leisure to get It for
yourself?
You ought lo be on your knees before
your parents, Instead of treating them
with tolerant condescension.
Nobody els* thinks you superior to
them: you are the only one who takes
that high attitude.
Until the day of their death you are
not free from Hie debt of love and car*
you owe your parents.
When you have children of your own
you will reallie th» magnitude of par
ental love.
The youth of this country Is famous
for Its lack of respect for Its elders.
Help to counteract that general Im
pression among foreigners.
I remember In Venice a frl»nd ahd f
became much Interested In watching s .
very pretty girl who, with her parents, -
was slaying at the same hotel that we
were. ■ i •
Don't B* Like That Girl,
"They are Americans." remarked my
frl»nd. who wa* an Englishwoman.
"How- do you know?" I asked. "You
have never even heard them speak."'
but I can tell hy the way she
treats her parents and older people. No
English girl would dream of showing
such lack of respect."
Don’t you think that I* rather dread
ful, girls, lo be picked out a* Ameriran
on account of lack of pollteneaa to
parents?
Don’t he like that girl: make up your
mind* that you at l*a*t will prove that
American girls can he Just as thought,
fill and polite to their parentg a* the
Iris of other countries.
You can tlo It If you try.