Newspaper Page Text
| Kathleen Norris Says:
Be Worth Wanting Girls
And You’ll Be Wanted
| (Bell Syndicate—WNU Service.)
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"Tom" said this girl, “we have to take my kid brother to Grandma’s. And Mama
wants me to stop and get her some vanilla. Isn’t this fun! This is the first time we’ve
been to a movie together!"
By KATHLEEN NORRIS
A WOMAN in our town, af
ter nine childless years of
marriage, adopted a baby
boy. She and her husband be
came so infatuated with the
charms of the tiny Keith that
a year or two later they adopt
ed a brother for him.
' Never were parents so hap
py as these two in their hand
some boys. John Macgregor
came home every night to
play with “our kids” and help
put them to bed. Nell Mac
gregor boasted everywhere
of the smartness of “the chil
dren.” And when Keith was
three and Bruce two, Nature
Stepped in and sent the Mac
gregors a boy of their own,
and this morning when the
ages of their small family are
five;. four and two years I am in
formed that there is to be another
child.
Stop Worrying.
This happens so often that it
makes one realize that the minute
a woman begins to stop fretting,
and worrying, and thinking exclu
sively about something, is often
the very moment when she is near
est to attaining it. Over and over
again the years, in which a woman
talks and worries and hopes for a
child, are wasted years and when
she becomes absorbed in some
thing real and forgets her yearnings,
the contrary baby decides it is time
to start on its way.
It is the same way with the un
married woman whose whole
thought is a fear of spinsterhood and
a desire to secure a beau. She ema
nates some element that repels a
man’s interest; she creates about
her an atmosphere that is destruc
tive to a love affair. Such a woman
places far too much importance
upon the whole thing. She can’t
take love naturally; she is always
thinking of it, construing the most
innocent friendly advances of any
man, into serious declarations,
frightening him off with her own too
eager response.
Looks Play Minor Role.
Hundreds of women, whose ages
range from 24 to 40, write me every
year about this problem. Sometimes
they send their pictures, to prove
to me that they are good-looking.
As if looks had anything to do
with it!
But they think looks have. And
many a time it is her fussiness
about her appearance, her embar
rassed apologies for her hair or her
old hat, or that maddening little
patch of poison-oak on her cheek
bone that make a man know that
here is a born old maid, thinking of
nothing but herself. Or rather, think
ing of nothing but the impression
the man is getting of herself.
She can be natural and simple and
amusing, with comfortable silent in
tervals, in the presence of anyone
else. But the minute a man is
around she goes stiff, self-conscious
and silly; tittering, saying things
she doesn’t mean, painfully shy one
moment, wildly reckless the next, al
ways presenting to him not only her
least natural side, but making an
impression that is absolutely un
fair to herself.
Develop ‘Comfortableness.’
The real basic trouble is that such
girls make men too important. The
man knows it, and while it flatters
his secret pride, he goes for com
fortable friendships to the other girls
those cheerful casual souls who don’t
mind his seeing them with a cold
in the nose, with an old coat, with
errands to do. If there is one qual
ity a man likes in a woman it is
“comfortableness.” He likes to be
made to forget himself, forget that
he is openly announcing himself as
an admirer of this woman, forget
everything except the pleasantness
of companionship and the fun and
joy of a good time.
The other night, on an evening
walk, I passed a small lighted house
from whose doorway a tai] girl was
briskly emerging. A young man was
waiting in the garden shadows for
her, and as she approached him she
was calling back a message into
the house.
“Mary, if you read my book don’t
lose the place; I will, Mama! I
Will, Dad. Tom,” said this girl,
joining the waiting swain, “we have
to take my kid brother to Grand
ma’s, because my sister’s here with
her baby. And Mama wants me to
stop and get her some vanilla; I
promised I’d make a chocolate cus
tard for Dad tomorrow. Isn’t this
fun!” she went on, as she and the
young man went toward his car,
“d’you realize this is the first time
we’ve been to a movie together?”
The Full Life.
The first time. But if I know men
it wasn’t the last. For in her easy,
joyous way she’d told him that she
loved her family and needed them,
and they needed her, and that even
a beau didn’t put her father’s, moth
er’s, sister’s, brother’s comfort out
of her mind; that she was interested
in plenty of things other than the
excitement of having a man take
her to a movie.
To be able to extend simple friend
liness to male friends, as easily as
to women friends, is a real gift. But
if it is not a natural thing it can be
cultivated. The secret is to be a
whole, complete person yourself, not
waiting for another person to round
out your entity. The moment a
woman finds life full and satisfying,
some man turns up who wants to
break in on that happy, contented
life, and share it. She is absorbed
in books, friends, work, hobbies,
plans. Next summer she is going
to do wonderful things; next win
ter she has been promised that ador
able apartment she’s had her eye on
for two years. Friday night is sym
phony night and Tuesday night is
the hilarious Spanish class, on Sun
day she always goes out to her
brother’s place and they picnic or
do something with the children. She
has a victrola, a radio and a car
and one or two of those male stand
bys who are not beaus, exactly, but
who are always on hand for escort
duty on real occasions.
Challenge to Men.
When an eligible man meets a
woman whose life is as well-rounded
as this, a yearning to upset her smug
little apple-cart takes possession of
him. She doesn’t need him, and so
he has to convince her that she does.
He asks her curiously why she, at
32, has not married, and she can
answer with perfect truth and seri
ousness that she’s been too busy—
she likes men, really she does, but
she never seems to have any time
to think of marriage!
But surely she’d like a home, and
kids of her own?
Well, ye-es, of course. But then
so often things don’t turn out right.
And she is so comfortable, with her
fire and her books and her friends—
He then must set to work to con
vince her that she is all wrong. A
woman doesn’t know what happi
ness is until she marries. He’s al
ways thought he didn’t want to mar
ry, himself, but as a man gets old
er and sees the happiness of his
friends—
And from that point on, all is
smooth sailing.
THE SUMMERVILLE NEWS, THURSDAY, JUNE 6, 1940
MENLO NEWS
Rev- and Mrs. Henry Norris are
visiting in Warrenton. Mr. Norris’
aunt, Miss Lenora Norris, who has
been visiting them the past few
weeks, returned home.
♦ ♦ *
Mr. and Mrs. Edward Majors and
son spent the week-end with Mr. and
Mrs. Luther Bryson in Summerville.
• * •
Mr. and Mrs. J. H. David, of At
lanta, were the guests of Miss Mil
dred McWhorter for the week-end-
» * •
Rich Bowers, of Elizabeth, 0., was
visiting in Menlo over the week-end.
* • •
Mrs. C. A. Wyatt and Mrs. S. T.
Polk were in Rome Monday.
• * *
Miss Pearl Hudson was the guest
of Rev. and Mrs. David Boozer Tues
day.
• * *
Mrs. Inez Young has returned from
Chattanooga after visiting her sister.
* * $
Miss Juanita Crane is visiting rela
tives in Rome this week.
* * ¥
Mr. and Mrs. J. H. Thomas and
family visited relatives at Tulip and
Coosa Sunday.
• » •
Mr. George Shoats left for Michi
gan Monday after an extended visit
here.
• * •
Rev. Steve Cloud will preach at
Chelsea Saturday night, May 8. Rev.
Cloud is pastor of the Menlo Baptist
church-
* * *
Mr. Lester Edwards and Billy Ed
wards spent Sunday at Sylacaugh,
Ala.
* * ♦
Miss Kathryn Story left last week
for Jacksonville, A|a., where she
will attend summer school.
* * *
Mrs. W. K. Laster visited a few
days last week in Chattanooga.
* * *
Mrs.. F. H. McWhorter and Mildred
McWhorter spent Monday with Mr
and Mrs. J. Robert Henderson in
Gaylesville.
• * •
Miss Olene Watson is visiting in
Mississippi for a few weeks.
* * *
Rev. and Mrs. A. H. Glasure, of
Hazard, Ky., are spending a few days
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