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THE ELCERIUN GAZETTE Pt’BLl«iEl) WEEKLY, AT EI.HKRTON, GKOIKJIA ratks or si'KscraoTU'x is auy.vxck. OXK YRAK $2 r.o SIX MONTHS 1-5 TURKU MONTHS TANARUS: KATES OF AnVKRTISISOi One square, first insertion, $1 00. Tor eneli »übeq«eut iosevrtion, 50 cents. Deductions made tor advertisements inserted for three, sis, or twelve mouths. The OlflWulty thotii Tlitii Itnf BY JOHN Ql'tl.L. This was the cause of all the trouble : ‘•Lost,on the 10th Distant.,a small Ter rier Dog, with a brass collar upon his neck, and the tip of his tail gone. Answers to the name of ‘Jack.’ five dollars reward, will be given the person who returns liitu to John Quill, No. 81 Rickety Row.” 1 inserted the above in the Daily Flipflap in the hope that 1 might reeover the animal, to which I was much attached. The Flip flap goes to press at ft A. M. At (>•< 1 was awakened by a pull at my door bell. I got out of bed and opened the window. As l looked out l saw a man standing in my front yard with a mongrel dog tied to a rope, lie gated up and observed : 'Hollo! are you the fellow wlio lost a dorg ?’ ‘Yes, I am.’ ‘Well, then, I’ve fetched him,’ said the man. I then explained to this wretched hitman being that my dog was a terrier, while lie looked more like a log of wood with half the bark oft", and propped up on four sticks, than a dog of any kiud. ‘Well, ain’t you a going to take him ?’ ‘I wouldn’t have Ifni as a gift. And 1 want you to move oft" now, or I’ll call the police.’ ‘Now, I guess you think you're smart, don’t you ? I’d bust you over the jaw for live cents, 1 would. You don’t know a good dorg when you see h’m, you don’t.’— And lie went out, after ripping the palings oft’ the fence. In about a half hour the." l was another ring at the bell, i went down. There was a man with six dogs, of a variety of breeds. ‘Wh wh which of Yin's him, b b boss,’ said this fellow, f.r he stuttered as if he would strangle on a small syllable’ ‘Neither ot them.’ ‘Y you said his n na uarno was J Jack, and didn’t yon V ‘Yes, that’s it.’ «w well, then, wh wb what d’ye call tli that V says lie as be sung out, ‘Jack!’ and the whole six dogs looked up and wagged their tails like a lot of spavined oxen in fly time, ‘Why, I call it confounded nonsense to expect me to take the whole six dogs because they're named Jack. I don’t want to start a sausage mill, you understand. Mince moat isn’t in my line.” »‘\V Wflbain't yon going to . .ko him?! •Certainly not; do you a appose 1 am a gibbering idiot •\V w w well, you sh shan't have him Wow if you want him. 1w w wouldn't trust a ueeent and dog with a in .n like you anyway.’ And the six canines Ic'd into line and trotted down the street after him. I had not got fairly into Iho house before there was another ring. Seedy looking man 'with a semi decayed yellow dog. 11 is i'ibs stuck out so that he looked as if lie had gorged himself with a spiral spring, ‘You advertised for a dog, 1 believe ?—- Well, l caught him around herein the alley after a desperate struggle. Fine dog, sir.’ ‘Well, I don’t think hois, lie looks to me as if he wasn’t well. He etherial for this world, young man, depend upon it..’ ‘Oh, not tit all, sir. Only shedding liis coat, sir; all good dogs do it at this time of year. Bee that, sir,’ said this seedy Caucas ian, holding the dog by the cuff of the neck. ‘See how lie yelps; that’s a sign of pluck ; that dog would fight a million wilds eats, lie would, and lick ’em, too, sir.’ ‘Get out!’ 1 exclaimed, and the dog put bis tail between his legs ami ran for tin: gate. ‘See that, sir ? see that?’ said the man, ns he seized him, ‘that’s a sign lie’s well trained; no raw dog behaves like that, I want you to know. Now, s’pose you fork over that five.’ ‘Not much! I don’t want him, my friend.’ ‘You won’t do it? Well, then, take him for seventy-five cents, and say no more about it. lie’s a valuable animal. You 11 never got another such a chance.’ ‘I tell vou T won’t have him.’ ‘Well, don’t then,’ said the man, as he kicked the animal over on my flower pots and broke three of them, while the brute dashed madly down the middle of the street. Just then a big ruffian in a slouch hat came up with a bull dog, sprung in the knees, and lamenting the entire loss of his tail. When the ruffian spoke to him lie wagged the whole of the last half of him. ‘l’ve brought that ore dog,’was the ob servation made by the ruffian, ‘’and I’ll fing er them there stamps, I reckon.’ ‘My friend,” said I, that is not my dug.’ ‘Yes, it is, though.’ ‘But it is not.’ ‘But don’t I tell you it is ? Didn’t you say the tip of his tail was gone ? Well, jest look at him, will you ?’ Well, I won’t have him, anyhow." “You waut to cheat me, do you ? I’ll fix you. 8 sick him, Bull!’ said the outrage ous ruffian, as the dog flew at ;ue giving me barely time to get inside and shut the door on his frontispiece. 1 guess 1 squeezed the nose off of that dog. * But the man cursed me for about five minutes and then flung n brick at the door and went away. In less than twenty minutes another ring. Small pock-marked man in a red shirt this time. Had a speckled dog that looked as if he had been out without an umbrella when if was ruining ink Says this victim of the small- pox : ‘You know the dog you ndvcriim 1 for? Well, here he is ?’ ‘0 pshaw !* said I,‘you know that isn’t my dog." ‘Your name’s Quill, ain’t it V 'll i«/ said I. pawr® ?|TlflTgl!i i Pf|Tfr (T jt (JCfwmmm li\ 8. >i. ('AIM’KNTFiR.I ‘Well, then, this here is the. dog. lie’s the best ratter you overseen. Slings linen around like he was umuMii hissell, he does, and—’ ‘But lie is uot my dog.’ ‘And lie’s a bully watch dog. Look at j him! Leek at him now —lie's Matching | now ! Why, lie’ll sit there and waleh, and j natch, uutil he goes stone blind he will, j lie'll watch all night if yen only let him. I You never see a watcher like him. T guess j I’ll jest chain him up while you go in and get the V.” ‘No. you needn't’ said I. ‘l'll blow his brains out if ymi don’t take him away.’ ‘Well, say, stranger. 1m a litt lo strapped to-dav ; jest lend me five on him this morn ing, m ill you ? I’ll pay you hack to-morrow.’ •See here, now, you just get out, of here or I'll take the hide elf of you,’ l said for 1 bt gan to get excited, you know.’ ‘Aw! you* ain’t worth a cent, you actually ain’t’ said the peek marked man as ! lie walked off, after clipping the dog over the head with one of my fence palings, and ■'flu n putting his fingers to his nose. Not a moment after, "p came a man with a mastiff big a-- a small horse. “Say, boss, 1 want that five,’ Was all he remarked by way of introducing the sub ject. ‘Well, you can’t got it, and if you don’t leave I’ll call the police,’ / exclaimed, in despair. “Watch him, Z\\)V said the man instant ly, and the dog flow at mo, threw me down, and bit a slice of muscle out of my leg and disfigured my nose for life. Then the as sassin who Owned him called him oil, and went sway laughing. I didn’t answer tiny more rings that day, but about I o’clock in the afternoon 1 look ed out of the second story window, and the yard was full of men with all kinds of dogs. Jil ack dogs, white dogs, yellow dogs, varie gated dogs, flea-bitten dugs with tails, dogs without tails, rat terries, bull pups, poodles, fox hounds, spaniels, Newfoundlanders, mixed breeds, setters, pointers, and a mul titude of ether varieties, all growling, yelp ing, harking, snapping, and jumping about until there wasn’t a flower pot left in the place, and the noise was worse than a me-' lingerie at tuea! time. I haven't got my dog yet. I don't want Turn, either 1 don’t care if 1 never see another dog between this and the silent grave I only wish that all the dogs frnjti here, (o .Russian America were collected in to a convention, and hold of that man with the mastiff, that they might gnaw on him until! Itohadn’t u mei.a 1 -1 and Id? oho ,-keut.oi. 'Flint ;.!! 1 waAt 111 the deg dec ill this world. llerriil Mill'd*'!.'. Capt. 11. If. Fletcher, onoof our best eit. zens, was waylaid six miles from this place on the Culbbert Road, and murdered, on Tuesday, the 11 th tilt. It soepftfl that the weapon used was a shot gun, loaded with large shot, eight id which-'entered his neck, killing him instantly. t)nc white man and sonic negroes saw tlrfl man who fired the gun running off in the bushes. The day bolero this occurrence Captain /'"etcher laid u difficulty with a matt named John Lee, late ol West /'lomln, “almost a stranger in this country,’ "which Jte regard ed as hut a slight affair, until inAnTnud by a friend that this man Leo hatj a . aid ii. ,1 I j i v. his int to attack him. Rapt. F. remarked thfllMjc did not think there was much od on to the the place v.hcrfl he. was finish ing a bridge across tie iNoehaway and, with iiis hands, was returning homo tn the evening, when the font deed was perpg* trated. This man Leo went liOMMJ, twill a ! young matt lie had omployud" **f. 'afi revenge—he had shot the feltow-ritil. did not know win tlier or not be *uj killed him —that ho hoard hiiu fall troiif hfs horse, aud that lie must lonye tlMrjountry, and wanted to borrow all the money lie had- — lie left on loot, in the night, (about fifteen minutes before a jaosso of men arrived at his huusc for the purpose e 4 .arresting him. 110 was closely pursued hfid arrested in Randolph county, and brought to this place. On being arrested, the party arresting him remarked “that he lmd killed a very fine citizen.” Ilia reply was, “ l et., and 1 would do it again under the same circum stances.” It is proper lo add that politics had noth ing to do with this unfortunate affair. — J ourH<tl. Leo lias since been tried : eleven for mur der, and one for voluntary manslaughter— a mis-triaL Nkwbfavkh Decisions. —Any person who takes a paper regularly from the post office, tor three issues, whether directed to his name or another, or whether he has sub scribed or not, is responsible lot the pay.— If a person orders his paper disccmtiued, ho must pay all arrearages or the publishers may continue to send it until payment is made, and collect the whole amount, wheth er it is taken from the office or not. The courts have decided that refusing to take newspapers and periodicals from the post offieo, or removing and leaving them uncal led for, is prima-facie ovidenco of iutciition- Ia! fraud. I’ostmasters are required to inform the. publisher wlmn any paper is refused at their office. Falling to do so immediately the postmaster becomes responsible for the pay. This is the law. The test of an erg i. to hold it to the ! light from a dark plaoe—in a dark zoom to Ia candle, or in both hands tUutiol form, to , the window by day—if it shows a yelk ! color it is good ; if opaque throw it away. Aiwa)- be Cool when you find your elf iu • a hot place. “Oar (L ountrj)—m;m sbe altos bt JJigjjMiut gigbt or tffltroug, <!;% tfoiiiiln).” HLHKRTON, (lEOtt'ilA, FRIDAY JUNK 25 1.800. Tlir ( letuttra <tl Power li» Eu rope Wonderful indeed have been the oliVves of power among the nations of Kut“ju' Who, not Well conversant with hi<v y, would imagino that two of the leading t mo; t powerful countries upon the cottfitfinf are the creations ol the lust century mil n half. Before Fetor the (.treat, who died Ft 172 ft, there was no Bitssia known to eivilj Ration. Prussia was almost, it not entirely the work of thi' gioat Frederick, who corns I moneod his reign in 1710. H bat would now be a I‘inropean ballanei)' of power which did not take into account, these two mighty military tnr.narohics? Em-1 pires, even mote than civilizations, hunt their changes and vicissitudes. '1 hrou him* died years ago the sovereignty of the world was divided between the powers of Spain and Austria. Tltero was then no great Britain. Scotland had its separate King and Parliament. Ireland was by no means subdued. England was of but little more importance as a great power than Sweden or Holland are now. Tito power of Franco, which, if united, would have boon formid able, was entirely frittered away in the re i ligious wars between the Frotcstaut Hugue nots. There was no Italy, for it was parceled out among Iho foreign powers. There was no Holland or Belgium, fur they were churn ed by, and belonged to Bpain. Russia and Prussia, as we have shewn, wore not in ex istence. The i’nitod States were net oven then iu embryo. A century later till this was changed. England, Scotland and Ire land have been consolidated into u llulled Kingdom. The genius of a great man, Oliver Cromwell, lmff made it a formidable power. The statecraft of Cardinals Riche lieu and Mazaritt, united to the ability ol Ljuis XIV., had made /Tattoo not only a great, hut a tremendously great power. Bite threatened all Europe, and was only pre vented by Jfrittttin, Austria, Holland and Belgium from obtaining universal dominion. Spain was rapidly losing her prestige. Bo closed the seventeenth century. Another hundred years witnessed the on tration ot Prussia and Russia into the Eu ropuan system as great powers. Spun was lading away in the dim distance as a bald ing nation. The power of thu house of Austria was declining. Tim Z'nitcd Stales, cradled in revolution, had been weaned front the colonial estate, and were taking a prop er position as a power of the immediate lit tore, if not of the present. France, mulei ll e oid r< ime, was losing its power and im ponum.e, , t tt.u. e \Un;', i • v- v, vitals. It 'l ined likely to follow in the path of Spain. Then catim ihoYevulntion of 1780, I’ltc it thunder-clap, or liN»' a J'.girado upon the civilized world. a to w politi cal birth.. Bite again became, utiuei demy, emtio energy, thu first flower of tlm eonti nent. Her main edfecks were Russia and Prussia, countries that had only appeared just below the political horizon. Tlteir power, however, mpidly increased, lit tt tew years these new adherents to civilized powers, in connection with Great Britain, entered Paris, and, if disposed, eftuld have blotted out /’ranee fruyi tbo 1 if;v ol the great powers. The loading European nations were then Groat Britain, Russia, Austria, Prussia tied .’’ranee. How rapid was the advance of Prussia ! In 1 72'), as wo liavu iissto was in her feeble inioiicy. Him Cossacks of the Russian Don U 4 Paris, the hoadquartots of Eu . W oiv ilizutiuii. /n the succeeding year the’ Prussian hussnrs, under lllueher, after tnlcampaign of Waterloo iu 18I'd, entered the 7‘TOiclt ctmitul. jpEifty'years have parsed since thou.— Train o is now one of the leading powers of Europe. Italy has boon reconstructed, and is utJwfimo of the great powers of the con tinent. The whole world has been changed. Those who once governed its destinies are impotent, and those who were once impo tent tiro now ail powerful.-*- CYAAi. ... v 4t»+ Some years ago, so the story goc;>, a far mer living not a thousand miles from New York, gave one of his sons some money, and told him to go West and remain two years, st the end of which time, if lie would re turn to a specified place, one of his brothers would moot him. The young man wont, an retured aud met his brother according to appointment, although t.o communication had taken place between them during the time. While going homo together the wanderer, alter relating some of his adven tures, inquired whether anything had hap pened since ho left home for the IVcat ? “No, not a single thing,” mid the other, “cverthiug is just the some as when you left—except that the old crow died.” “Indeed,” said the wanderer, “trad is (ho old crow dead—wliut killed him?” “Why he ute too much moat when iho matched horses died.:’ “Good gracious ' are tho matched horses dead, wlmt killed them?" “Well, you see when thu house and ham burned, they overdid themselves in hauling water.” “Good gracious ! arc the house trad barn burned down—how did it happen ?” “Well, you see when daddy died they | Were carrying tho lights around and wore ! careless.” “Good gracious ! and is daddy dead— what was the mutter with him ?” •‘Well, you see when Sal ran away and got married against daddy's whishes, lie just pitied away and died - ” “Good racious Iso nothing has happen ed since I’ve boon away l" “No, uvertliing is just tho -into !” To tho public.—Any person having a tew minut i to : pare, is respectfully requested to send them to our ofliee, where they will bo thankfully ree.ivod. “Time is money," mid “every lit! h. ’p. Tlie Tux Hill. Somebody proposes the following now amendments to the tax hill: For kissing a pretty girl, one dollar. For kisssing ti homely otto two dollars the extra amount being added probably for the man’s folly. For tadies kissing one another, two dot" lavs. The tax is plaeetl'at litis rate iu order to break up the custom* altogether, it being regarded layout' M. I'.Vits.ti piece of Inox t usable absurdity.. , ‘ ’ \ /’or ev.cry flirtation, trn cents. ' Every young man who has more flipn otto girl is taxed five dollars. For courting in the kitchen, twenty ILy*) M * jJWdtikoni uhureh without tioooinpany log ti hiSy, five dollars. Seeing tt lady home Irotii the Mine So ok ly, live emits —Tim proceeds to bo do vttoU to the relit tof disabled army chaps ltnt'jfe Eor Ladies who paint, fifty cents. /br .wearing tt low-nocked dress, one del lai\ ■ I >r each curl on a lady's head above ten, livdpojts. /'or uov unfair device forentvapping men into liuttimony, five dollarsi /fio' weaving hoops larger than eight foot in otrcuiufereueo. eight vents for ouch l^iop. Olt btiohclors over thirty tiro taxed ton dollar , ami banished to t tr.li. Eaih pretty lady is lo bo taxed twenty. five clots ‘o twenty-live dollars j oho is to fix tho estimate ot"Vr own beauty. It is thongl t a very largo amount is to bo realiz od lro! i this provision. Kno) boy baby, fitly omits. Kitoi girl baby, ton omits. /anilies having moro tbnu eight babies ttru notVo bo taxed ; unit lor twins a pro minUin if forty dollars will bo paid out of (bo fituis uemuing from tux on old bache lors, 1 P.aohmnduy loafer on tho street cornor or about! (dm, eb doors to bo taxed liis vtil* no, whivb is about two cents. 1— ’i’ll*' «>l Four Lieut Men. 'Fluidutil' eonqtior.irs wlmooottpy tho tnosl eons|WutVi places in the history of the world are, Alexander, lltuinibal, Etesttr and liotiaputtol Alt satidor, uf.cv havingolitnhml thedlttr.y hr.cloy II ] .la iniou, With liis tOlllpluS b'MM.’ uA •!. y’,j >d e Fhe lie.. I el’ miri'ni ,T) I,l'd. ,1 ctelvu upon a euiiqinueii Mon ~ tiod w. pt Fuat tltero was not tray ether fetid ibr 1 * tin lo eotiqtn r, set ncily on liie, met tiled iu a mine of debauch. ii.u : .11, after imuop;, b> the Ufttout.'h n:ont ami coi'bternulioh of Rente, pasta" 1 tho A’| i and having put to flight lira ar mies of tho mistress id' the world, and strip ped “litre© btishidrt ol gold rings from tint Unger* of iter slaughtered knights,” and made hot fouittlalioua quake, tlud from his country, being haled by llraso who nnott oxs ultingf, ariitoil bis itame lo that of tlioir g.od, and oalletl him llaui-linal: and died at lust by poison administered with liis own bund, unlumcutod and unwept, in n foreign land. Cai-tit:, after having onnquorod eight hun dred cities, aud dyeing his garments in lira blood of one million of bis foes, alter hav ing pursued to death lira only rival ho had on onrih, was miswably assassinated by those Ira ei'msid'ored his nonrost ftiontls, and in that very plaoo the attainment ot'which had been bo; greatest ambition. Botnparte, whoso mandates kings and popes übeytsd, after having tilled the earth with tho terror of liis uuino—alter Iniving deluged Europe with tout's mid blood, and clothed tho world iu snckolotli —closed liis days !tt lonely banishment, almost literally c.'Jtlod from the world, yet whore lie coiilu sometimes see liis country’s Imtinor waving over the depot, but wlneli did not and could not bring him aid. Thus those four groat men, who seemed to stand tlm representative! of nil those whom the world calls great- those lour men, who ouoli in thru made the earth tremble to its very centre, bv tlioir simple trend, severally died—otto by intoxication or, as Yvu* supposed, by poison mingled with his wine—one a nuici(le«sono murdered by liis ft;ictuts trad one a lonely exile! How wretched in the end of u!I w’V earthly greatness 1 Popular Eititoit*.—To think that the more a man outs, tho fatter and stronger he will become. To believe (but lira more hours children study, tbo faster limy learn. To conclude, that il exercise i* good, tho limit violent*lt is, the more good is done. T«. imagino that every hour taken from /dcup in an hour gained. lo'nct on the presumption that tho small est room in the house is largo enough to sleep iu. To argue that whatever remedy causes one to feel immediately better, is good for tho system, without regutd to more ulterior offset a. To eat without an appetite, or to con tin no to eat after it has been satisfied, merely to gratify tho taste. 'J u eat a hearty suppor for the pleasure experienced during the brief time il it. is passing down the. throat, at the expen e of a whole night of disturbed sloop, trad a weary waking in the morning.— Bouton Journal ft Clicmirtiy. — — - ♦ *• -- A Lawk'h Man.—We uskod a friend u day or two agu about u gentleman who bad just left him. Mr. 1 ho answered,‘ho is onoof those follrws that tho ladies think m, imieli of—they are all on excellent terms j with him, you know —they ask him to go places with them and when they get there they talk with somebody else." IVOR IV7--NO. 20 Tlie ri*‘n. IIV JIN<!O, will I, K HE WAS UNt'Elt THE INSPIRATION OE 1118 R'IMF'T. The 11 ec iz a uoomerotts bu;;g—esprsliily in Jitno. Tho origin ov this bugg iz'iailod in mistry. Bwedouburg sez he originated in It—ll. I wish he werjliar.now, if 1 ntav use the expreshun. 1 kuthrat' lull oYit \vitlt itaelmre or eny otra elso I’er L. eopatrinaion but 1 du say i wist' edw had made .bins ;t Jiltlo eltJtnJei' ill ' ' * «■. A'©*' tfWTO'tnT!Vovygij bung. Ho h ro ,spk«kfuljy rVferred trmfi the Boriptures, WmwJi faith,■■“tbo wlokwl fine when nu man pursUoth,” which remaik ur vqtiilly apply'- kttble to sum 0 or a ball dttzin now in my Intle which 1 kannot now ]niisue. Tho flee lie i also jump PdUU times his own length without dtnu lie I Is. This tire sum jumping this iz! The (tttbjook ov these pltew remark* iz sod lit ltav a poooollar nlleekshin for die boag. But wften wo amtlize tlie matter WO find ho only uses tho hegg tu ’vide on bis buck Into tno human fumiloe, wieli he likes better than tho ltogg familee. One flee can usually bo found at sever'd plaees at oiiet, but yu very selilum ketch him at any ov them. El' you do, you are smarter tlmo I, mul 1 will give yu a chew ov 2d handed juice ex I meted torbuckuw on demand. Even so! Tho following remedy Ibr tbo (leo I ltayo ttown ter Hukseod. It. is onuvailabul, how ever. till your (leo iz knuglil. 1. Entangle your 1100 in his I ggs lo pre vent tseape. 2. l'l ace him onroluliy on your left tliuiu nale. 11. Plaoo the right. Ilmtn tittle on lt'iu. 4. Mash like 2 millstones. Your flee iz then usually found Iu boded, darned and doluuot, except enulV for bis pielor under a mikerskopo. hi Oil Story. Bam Black, who owned a tiling little farm, was somewhat startled one day by an offer ot more than twice iho worth of it in green backs, “Shall yen sell lira farm, Samuel?” uskod his wife. “Ecrtninly 1 shall,” said Sum, “il tho ex cited individuals don't hack out or prove to boa couple of escaped lunatics, ns I linlf sup pose (Item to bo.” A fin ite bargain wax made and the mom i ay J r.. >oira ot moil* foul* Bum ami flu* WjJii to tin- hark part of lira farm, whore wiTsT" small excavation in the ground filled up by tbo recent, rain. “800 what you’ve lost and we've gained," raid lira excited individual scooping up some of the water in uu old tin cup, and holding it for inspection* Bure etiOUgll'the oil was ball'tut inch thick on lira top 01/lbo water. Ham was izMignant. If ho hadn’t been n foul, us lie said to bis wife, and bail wntoli ml lor indications, ho might have died a inillionait'o. Sum's wilb wan bursting with laughter, hut coimtrtiining homill, slio coaxed her luisbatiil into the house and told him the whole story. “You remember when 1 had my cough last, winter and l lie doctor recoin mended cud liver oil, Bam, ami you brought homo a whole gallon boouuno you got it cheap, and made me protniHO to take a dose throe times a day? Well, I didn't und it stood in the (doNot, until I cleaned the bouse, when I threw it into the bole lit lira foot ol tbo garden Ham flow lira joke and pocketed tho cream of it in tlm ftitupo of a pile ol greenbacks. At last accounts, Bum wan living in clo vor, while tho hunters were industriously boring—and may bo until t hi,-; time for all wo know. Dat’h Wot 1 Sj'Ket.—hi the olden time when tho planters wore less thoughtful for the corporeal health of tho slaves, Eolottol Ramsey siDv liis hny, Dim (aged forty) going otto morning, lliblo in hand, to cliurclr— Knowing that Dun was not a porsofl will) strong literary proclivit ie s the Colonel said : “Wlmt are you doing with that Bible’ Duo—you can’t toad it. i’ “No, mossn, can’t ’zaelly read 'em, out 1 ennspell ’em out a little.” “What's the use ol' spoiling it out? You euu't n.iulofstaiid it any way. Tho Bible, fur iustauoe, says that. ‘the. very hairs on pur bead are numbered,” Now you lmvi »*’t any hail' on your bead—nothing but wool. Wlmt do you say to that V “Yes, iiiassu, 1 ’spoof dat’s so ; but 1 spell out one little verse, which say dal ou las’ day do sheep iley go one side und do goats on tedder. Now do sheep lias do wool, but do goals iley got liar just like white folks; and I ’spool iley ain't gwitra to bo saved— dal’s wot I ’speed.” „ ■*«', A Staumik Adventure. — Mv, Rodblo.v Horn drank more than hi* usual allowance of hut rum and sugar, one cold night, the eou s(!(|ueiieo of which was, lto gave his wile a rather confused uccount of liis conduct, on his return home. “Mr. Smith's grocery store invited mo to go ami drink cousin Hum, and you see, tho weather was dry—and I was very sleepy—so I said 1 didn’t mind punching one drink—nod's queer how my head went into the punch though 1 The way home was so dizzy', tint' I slip ped upon a little dog—the corner of the street hit mo--and uu old gentleman with cropped ears and a brass collar ou bis neck, said ho belonged to Iho dog—/ was- -you undos,ssand —ic—that is, l don’t know noth, ing more about.” An editor says that when Itc was in pris on tor libelling a Justice of the ’’('at''', bo was requested by the jaitor "to ;;iv the prison a puff." J’llid ci A Z IdTT Id JOB OFJ 'ICi: is COMPLETE, AAD \\ i« hit jhcjeucil to do all kinds ot‘ JOB WORK in ill,. 1,..nt, i ylc, trail on reiieouulil • term* I.IUUI AI. VIl: I I MINI fNsKHTXn AS SOLI.UW* : [ ,-![>,Tin’. ■ll 11, r levy ot It) ltties, 00 i. uim't.'iige Null-*, (JO (lays, 7 00 Hal . to du) , i.y Altai rs, Kx’rs or ‘tear. « 30 Cllaiirai iit'Ailmii.l-ti'nt’ti or (iiiarJiultidilp 6 00 I Nut ire io I'(‘liters amt Creditors, & 00 j \i I, |,i'r sqteii'C, each liisottioa, 1 00 Two Mimtlu. Notices 1 60 i Citall.m ter di- iiii.-iuit of Administrator, S OU |. " " “ Guardian, 600 PeNmeraiice I*a I'ai'iMlnjr. There are many larmers who do not stick to one thing lung enough to make it pay, and eons 'qnontly they lose in everything.-*. At otto time they conclude to devote them* . Ives to stuck raising. Before they get fair ly utidcr headway in tiiis they change their mi mI - amigo back to raising grain. Some •again nmko a specialty lbv u time ol u cer tain mop—wheat, corn, or potutooa for in tanee. AYhile they arc following this sue- Viulity the crop* may Ira small and tna pt i.-'. lew, ami-they turn to ju«t in liuiC'tft Ati** large'i'V'.pv iff w’at they ImverhjfL The Best Armors we have observed arc those who havcTomtd out what Their soil is best, adapted't n produce, They then turn their ctrercie- in that direc tion, Ttitf go for'.'it'd iu Fiat, line; A poor crop does not, tliscourngo them. They goon,and nro sure to be successful.— To illustrate our idea : W’o once knew a far mer who made it tt point to fatten from 25 to 'ill lings every year. Let tho price of pork be high or low, ho every year had his lot ol hogs,about the usual number, lie took great pride in having the best itt (lie noiglt liutltood. Some years, perhaps, lie might have done better by selling liis corn than by feeding it. Some years, lie might have done better by turning bis whole attention to soimt other specialty in farming. But 1m always noticed this, that, taking otto year with another for a long time, say ten years, ho made tlm hogs pay. Ho was a successful farmer. Another farmer near by, planted potatoes every year. Sometimes Ids crop would fail, and other times when lie had a good crop the price would be low. But lie kept straight forward. 1C very spring he planted potatoes. Tho result iu thatcasu was tho same us that in tho oilier. Taking otto year with another for a considerable number of yours, ho mado tho potato crop pay. lie, too, was a successful farmer, The farmer who would make his business pay must have a policy, and adhere to it.— American Earner's Magazine. - *•*■»+ ————— The I'heem and the Ftinuo.—One of the most common but most absurd mistakes which people make now-u days, says the (iluirlenton News, is in imaginiug that a com munity confers upon tho newspaper which it support* an obligation, which can only he ouncollod by the most obsequious eom p i nice with (bo whims trad dof'oronce to th» opinions of the individual among tho mass of its renders, who may take tbo troublo to favor it with his views. Modern journa lism like it; sister institutions—the postal ."iVsteni and telegraph -gives to tho pubh’o Tiav'anla’geV nut nr all prnj-oiEten ;» the money value at v.'.rah limy are rated ; ntid the man win lor- a good newspaper, a valla hi me cl I' of a privilege, (ho oxtvodinury cheapness of which by can hardly appro*' ointo because of hibitual enjoyment. Tbo ndverti; r, likewise, who make*known bis business the column: of a journal circula ting widly among all classes, ought; to unclerj stand that lie thereby secures tho richest possible return for the trifling sum be may have invested. In both eases, tho custom er gets bis full money, worth tnuny times multiplied ; mid the assumption that thero is titty obligation whatever in either is sim ply preposterous. The terms “patron” and “patronage" as applied to the ratdeis and business of a newspaper, nro still used by some country editors ; but have long since Ik m repudiated by all journalists who am mindful of tho true position and dignity of tboir calling. »*——— Symptom* op Old Maidisiiness. — When a woman begins to drink tea without any sugar—that's a symptom. When a woman begins to road lovo sto ries a -bed —that's a symptom. When tt woman gives a sigh on hearing of a wedding—that’s a symptom. When a woman begins to say that site’* refused many an offer—that’# a symptom. When a woman begins to say what a dreadful set ot creatures men nro, flint slio wouldn't bo bothered with one for all the world—that's u symptom. When a woman begins to have n little dug trotting after her —that’s n symptom. When u woman begins to hnvo a cat at Lor elbows at meal times, and gives it sweet milk —that's a symptom. When a woman begins to rub her finger over the vhttirs and tables to see il tlray tire dusty —that’s n symptom. When a woman begins to go to bed wilfi hor stockings and liattnel night cap ou —that's a symptom. RemAitKAiiLK Work* oif Human La eoe.—Nineveh was so ur toy n miles long, eight wide and forty miles round, with a wall 100 feet high, and thick enough for three chariots abreast. Babylon wus fifteen miles within the walls, which were 75 feet thick and 100 feet high, with 100 brazen gates. The temple of Diana, at Ephesus; was 420 foot to the support of the roof.— It was a hundred years iu building. Tbo largest of the pyramids ir 481 feet high and lift;) on the sides ; its base covers eleven sici'i"). The Stones urn about OU leet in length, trad they nro 2UB in number. It ( mpli'yuil li.’iO,ooo men iu building. Tito labyrinth in Egypt contains 200 chambers and 12 hulls. Thebes’in Egypt, presents rnin* twenty scum miles round. Athens was twenty live utiles round, and contained ”>50,000 inhabitants and o*o »luvos. The temple of Delpbos was so rich in donations that it was plundered of fifty millions of dol lars, and Nero carried away trout it 200 i i.tatuos. The walls of Route \vero 13 miles { t mind. - ♦ -op “Why, Mr. Jones, arc you drunk?” ex daiuted Mrs. J., as her husband came into the hottsQ late at night. “N-tvo, my dear,” | said Joucs, “N-uottd dvuuk, but. ouly diz ; d'tZg fr-from lookin’ at the tellers go round | on their vctewsipedc*." t