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TUESDAY, OCBER 20 OH, MTT ALWAYS MAKES IT FOR LIFE! s o) (W ffw ' \ 1 TA^e THe \ Sg J _ a* t " A «£W4H. T**A | \ PL6.S6G V f **&*> *°OH- HOW UtUAL, — J * ■ . iki,s have a Laugh with Mclntyre and Heath as “The Hold-Up Men” These Two Grea.t Comedians Are Going- to Be Seen Here in “The Ham Tree,’’ This Comedy Is Fully Protected for Al! Use by Mclntyre and Heath, Heme Published by CHARACTERS, ngerous Dan. ibe Tenderfoot ;ENE —A mountain gorge on a threatening eldy night. he hold-up men, Dan and Rule, enter tloto liu if very tired Rufe carrying a large spice C,st and Dan carrying an old dour bag con tning weapons and rope. 3 AN —Get a gait on you, Rule, we’re only got twelve miles further to go. RUFE —Twelve miles! Why, that’s six niles- apiece. DAN—Yes, that b all. Come on. RUFE—I can’t do it, I’m feeling too pre posterous. DAN—Why. you’re not going to weaken tow? RUFE —Weaken now’ I’ve been weakenin’ for a week back! And my back is weak, too. DAN—You’re weak-kneed, I think RUFE—No, I’ve got curvableness of the spine. DAN —(Toil haven’t sufficient backbone, as It were. RUFE+ That’s It I think I’m going Into a decline DAN—Tea, yor are falling away from a bar rel to a to: bead Are you very tired? RUFE- l'ired! Say, the best thing the good Lord evir tier c was to fix us so as we could sit dour fails on rock.) DAN lYou look kind of weather-beaten. (Sits opfosite j RUFE i ant weather-beaten. 1 bet a fellow $5 it wculd rain yesterday, and it didn't. DAN-Well, you ought to feel like a young broncho after that tender chicken dinner you put away yesterday 1 wonder if that was real punkinpie they gave us there? RUFE —Well. It was the punkest taste they had. let’s take a snooze here. DAN Snooze! Don't the doctors tel) you not o sleep on a full stomach? RUfE —Well, 1 can sleep on my back, can't l! DAN—Oh, nonsense! RIFE—A full stomach, why, I'm hungry enough to eat a peck of gondolas. DAN- Eat gondolas? What do you Imagine rondo-las are? RITE Gondolas? Why, a gondola Is a kind f vegetable -tastes somethin' like a squlnce. DAN 1 h. ridiculous Come, ’tls time we CONESSION BY “THIRD DGREE” HELD ILLEGAL Atlan, Ga. —A “third degree" con fession oes not amount to anything and is sgal, according to the ruling of Jud Ben Hill of the superior court, -ank Wright, a negro accus ed of bglary, admitted that he had confess* to the crime but that he was inn»nt and had confessed pure ly beca» Sergeant Bullard of the UGH CALOMEL IS HORRIBLE! II SUCKS YOUR LIVER, IE BILIOUS Calomelickens! Don’t lose a day’s work! Clean your br and Bowels with “Dodson’s Liver Tone.” Ugli! Gael makes you rick. It’s horrible! > a dose of the danger ous drug ight and tomorrow you may lose ay’s work. Calomel nercury or quicksilver, which camnecroris of the hones. Calomel, w it comes Into contact with sour brashes Into It, breaking It up This >hen you feel that awful nausea and nplng if :ou are slug gish and knocked out," If your liver Is toritnd bowels constipated or you have iache, dizziness, coated tongue, if Is bad or stomach sour, just ti spoonful of harmless Dodson's UTone tonight. Here's mjiarsni.ee—Go to any drug store igrt a 60 ce.nt hottlo of Dodson'* I’ tons. Take a spoon Permission. were on our way, I long to be rick. RUFE—WeII, yen don’t long any longer than me. DAN—Well, get a move on, then. RUFE—No, I don’t believe ni continue; I guess I’ll take root bore and grow up with the country. DAN —Why, you're npt going to quit now, Just when fc ne is within our grasp. Why, Rufe, 1 can feel the money In my hands now, RUFE —Well, my hands don’t feel nothin’ but warts. DAN—Do you remember when I first met you? Didn't I say there was money In you? RUFE—Yes; but you knew I swallowed a dime that day. Anybody could tell there was money In me If they knowed that DAN—Well, there Is money In you yet RUFE—Oh, no; 1 was broke when I started off with you, but now I’m completely busted. DaN—Well, I acknowledge that money is close. RUFE—Yes; bu: not close enough to reach. Dan, what's In this bureau, anyway? DAN —That? Why, that chest contains numer ous samples of deadly poisons. RUFE —Poison! And I’ve been cartin’ it ’round with me! That does sottle It—wo divide right here. DAN—-One moment! The scheme on which I am about to enlighten yon will at once strike you as being a brilliant achievement of the mind. RUFE —Well, I’vo had cheese on my mind for several days. A sweltaer sandwich would hit ms Just about right about now. DAN —Listen! The United State* Govern ment is offering fabulous sums to medical men to make diligent research Into the doato deal ing qualities of the different poisons. Carefnl Investigation Is also under way to discover their various antidotes. RUFE—I discovered a hairy nannygoat this morning, but I couldn’t catch him. DAN —Oh, tut, tut RUFE3 —No, butt, butt DAN—Now I have made a life study of poi sons, but I need a subject to show their effi ciency to ths clinics, and that Is where you come In. You see, what I desire of you Is this: I will incarcerate you la a hospital and feed you on poison. RUFE —You will? Well, you won't I feed on spare ribs and Ice cream, no poison In mine. police department had slapped him during the examination. Judge Hill charged the jury to dis regard all testimony in the negro's confession, saying it would have no bearing on the case Wright was ac quitted. The court took occasion to express his distrust of the brutal methods of the “third degree’ and his lack of faith in any statements made under terror of threats. ful and If it doesn't straighten you right up and make you fed fine and vigorous 1 want you to go beck to the store and get your money. Dodson's Diver Tone is destroying the sale of calomel because it is real liver medl. cine; entirely vegetable, therefore it can not salivate or make you sick. I guarantee that orm spoonful of Hod son's Mver Tone will put your sluggish liver to work and dean your bowels of that sour bile and consti pated waste which is c logging your system and making you feel miserable. I guarantee that a bottle of Dodson's Mver Tone will keep your entire fam ily feeling fine for months. Give It to your children. It is harmless; doesn't gripe and they like Its pleasant taste. THE VICE SITUATION IN ATLANTA BEING AIRED Atlanta, Ga.—The vice situation In Atlanta had another airing today the grand Jury reconvened for Its fifth day of investigation and called May er Woodward and others before it. Mayor Woodward expressed himself as emphatically against a plan to give the police department more money for “stool pigeons" who would play spy and hunt down offenders. The fore man, W. Woods White, had suggested that detectives be hired to spend sev eral days In suspected houses and thus gain evidence. The mayor said such evidence would be thrown out of court. The mayor read a list of a hundred or more boarding houses and other places alleged to be disreputable. Sev eral prominent hotels were named. G. N. Henfroe, who nas offices In the Gould building, testified 'that he could look acroes the street Into the windows of s hotel and see examples of the evil of scattering immoral wo men around the town. PRESIDENT’S POWER OVER THE STATE MILITIA. Washington.—A motion for an early hearing of the case of Lieutenant Colonel Daniel C. Stearns against Brigadier General George H. Wood, both of the Ohio National Guard, In volving the power of the president to vc-nd the militia out of the territory of the United States without first mustering it in as a volunteer force, was Monday submitted to the supreme •oiirt. The point was at issue In militia circles a few months ago, when ths guard was preparing for service in Mexico. fHE AUGUSTA HERALD, AUGUSTA, GA. DAN—Bat a* harm wtU come to yes. I watch you dally and when you show elans of dying 1 come to your rescue with an antidote. RUFE—When I’m dying you’ll ride to my rescue an a nannygoat Not me, a goat le toe slow. You'll have to rid* to my rescue in an automospUL DAN-—There Is heaps sf money In thle tor you, and tt you should dlo accidentally I will guarantee yon will have a splendid funeral. RUFB—That’s good. I hope I'll tlva to see tt DAN —And I’ll promise you a glorious wake RUnC Well, that’ll help some. But if Tm dead nobody will be able to wake me. DAN—But you won’t die, and think of the fortune In the poisons. RUFB—OHes, and think of the poison In me. Nay, nay. 111 fill my anna tummy with no poison. Ham and beans tar mtne. DAN —Then yon refuse! Rirra—Most posittvltous. I recline your golden offer. DAN—Don’t yen cere for money? RUFB —-No. I cere no more for money than I do for my life. DAN —Well, hold! I have still another proj ect whereby we caa speedily become wealthy men. RUFE—Expostulate the subcumstances. DAN- —Shi Not a soul but you most hear this. We will turn bandits. RUFE —Bandits? What’s them, hoboes? DAN—No. Hold-up men, sale to hold up anybody. RUFE —I can hardly hoM myself up. DAN—Sh! I have the victim marked. RUFE —What did you mark him with, chalk? DAN —You know the mall carrier. Grizzly Bill? RUFE —Welt you're not. going to hold up him, are yon? DAN —He’s our man RUFE —You mean, we’re his meat) Good-by, I’m going. Grizzly BIUI Oh; Oh! Why, had sooner wring your neck than ring a bell. DAN —You're not afraid, are you? RUFE—Oh, no; but what’s the use of dying so young? DAN—Oh, you won’t die. Listen! To-night at 11:30 Bill passes this spot and In his sad dle bags he will carry a large amouat of specie. RUFE —What'e that, tobacco? DAN—No, money. Fifty thousand dollars In notes and gold coin have been Intrusted to hie care. The exprees company heard the train was going to be held up by Broncho Pete’s gang, and so they are sending the money overland by Grizzly Bill If we ancceed In get “My oldeet son," said Mrs. Twlck embury, “speaks several languages quite flippantly.”—Chrlatlan Register “Give Me Another Cup” Just deliciously wholesome coffee with all the goodness of the coffee bean retained. A real, health-building drink—free from all injurious substances. It’s real coffee—not a substitute. Jatt a "pinch " |n a cap— add hot ivolar and seres. SMITH BROS., Jobbers. Cnvriffct. ieiA w sm mu Omr. »«•* anwai sight, am™*. ting It Just think what your share would bo. “Tired! Are you good at figures? <* RUFE —Yes, I need to pick out chorus girls , “‘J 1 for comic operas. the DB«t DAN —Then you are all right Now. your thing half of *36.009 would bo *M9O. the RUFE <countn on flnpert) That’s correal good But how can we get all these samoMaas? Lord DAN —Very simple. This spot Is where ever Grizzly Bill stopz to rest When be arrives done at this spot he and his horse will be almost W3S exhausted. to fix RUFE—That would be a ootngular atnri us so as donee. ’Cause this Is where I gad exhausted. we COdld What's the name of this place? §[f DAN —This locality Is known as Dead Man’s down." It’s tough, but a bride must ex pect to lie neglected aome during her husband's office hours. Malaria or Chills & Fever Prescription No. 666 it prepared 'especially lor MALARIA or CHILLS a FEVER. Five or six doses will break any case, and if taken then as a tonic the Fever will not return. It acta on the livar better than Calomel and does not gripe or ticken. 2So BE REASONABLE NOW LISTEN CARII is the mighty FACTOR In TRADE)—We eel) for CASH and HAVE TOC MONEY as quoted below: 4- bottle Hyr. White Pine Co., with Tar 200 614-ounce bottle syr. Tar. Cod Diver Oil Extract and Menthol 300 5- Aspirin (capsules nr tablets) 20c doa. 5-graln Quinine (capsules or tablets) 20c doa. 1-pound White Moth Balls 5^ GET OUR PRICES ON DRUGS AND PREBCRIPTIONB. WE SAVE YOU MONEY. TRY US 18 ALL WE ABK. Your, for GREATER AUGUSTA, THE GREATER AUGUSTA PHARMACY Wrong Bide of Street, 1281 Broad Btrsot —Right Side of Prices. Augusta Trunk 735 Broad Street. BY “BUD’' FISHER Gulch. RUFE—Dead Man’s Gulch? Brrrrl I’m go ing home. DAN—Why. you ere not a coward, are you* RUFE —1 should say not. DAN —You see, several hundred emigrants were murdered around here, and they say that their ghosts promenade here after midnight. RUFE -Ghosts! Good-by, Liza Jane. I’m off for sure now. DAN (p ultimo pun) —Hold on! Toutl stay; or HI send you to Join the ghost promenade before your time. RUFE—I knew 1 was due for mot* head luck, I lost my rabbit's foot this morning. DAN—You don’t know when yoa*xo well off. Look at the freedom you enjoy. Yon have free air, free water, free roads; freedom every where. Everything free. RUFE —All except free lunch. »• DAN—Now the time Is drawing nigh for Grizzly Bill’s approach. He is a daring fellow and we must arm ourselves. Here are two trusty weapons. ( Pull* out tong twordt.) Take your choice. Are you a good fencer? RUFE —Oh, yes. I’m a wonder at that DAN—Well, now, how would you use your sword In a duel, if, when you lunged, your opponent feinted? RUFE- I’d faint, too. What I mean. I’d tickle him with the point to see If ha was klddtn’. DAN —Well now then, don’t let Grizzly BUI get too dose quarters. HoM htm off with your sturdy weapon; and while yam fence with him and engage hie attention I’ll com* on kins un awares and finish him up. RUFE—WeII, where will yon be while I’m fencing? DAN —Oh, ?U be off In the woods somewhere and pretend I’m not around. RUFB—You'll be off to (he waste? DAN—Yes. RUFE— How for off? . jft} DAN —Oh, twenty miles or so. RUTO--Twenty miles I and ms here ndens fencing with Grizzly BtUl DAN—Sure! You must hold Mm at bay. RUFE —Yes, and Til have my heads Ml hrddln’ my own without holdln’ BflL DAN—Well, if he’s doing you Jest braes off and whistle for me. RUFF—fhipposs I don't get a chance ff whistle! DAW—in that case you can declare a tram and then while the truce Is pending, wMstlb. RUFE—Declare a truce, HI declare tt all off. Dan, you’d better not go, I can’t wMotlm How many people do you suppose will be willing to live in an unwired home five years from today? Fair Week Prices This week we offer specially Low Prices on TRUNKS, VALISES, SUIT CASES, ETC Gents’ Pocketbooks, Ladies’ Hand Bugs. FIVE Factory Opposite Monument.