Below is the OCR text representation for this newspapers page.

Daile limy Tines. TRENTON, GEOIIGI A. ■ '■ The grade crossing boasts a far more appalling record as a life-destroyer than dynamite. Postmaster-General Wanamaker is said to favor the reduction of letter postago from two to one cent. mmrnmmmrmwwmmwmm i i ■ The Legislature of New Jersey reduced the legal rate of interest in that State from six to five per cent. There has been a marked decrease in the Boulanger excitement at Paris since the General’s exit from the scene. The Chinese Minister at Washington has a great admiration for American wo men. He says they are the most beauti ful in the world. The once fighting Modoc Indians have become industrious farmers in the past twelve years, and half of them have pro filed Christianity. According to Dr. Pliny Earle, the cure of insanity is becoming more and more difficulty. It is said that less than thirty per cent, of the patients recover. The New York Commercial Adertiser asserts that it is noted in Massachusetts that the prohibition amendment is the first constitutional amendment ever re jected in the State. The Land Commissioner says there will be an interminable lot of land contests in Oklahoma, and that it will probably take many years to clear up the titles to much of the land which will be in dis pute. The Toronto (Canada) Mail says that owing to the prosperous condition of af fairs in England at present, Kir George Stephen does not think there will be a large emigration from that country this season. It was a strange coincidence that forest fires were raging in many localities at a time when most of the States were a,bout to celebrate Arbor Day. History points the moral of tree planting better than a hundred sermons. A Minnesota man has set up a bear ranch, where he feeds corn meal to the bears he traps just as he would do hogs till they are in prime condition, when ho slaughters them, and, besides selling the meat at high figures, gets a good many dollars for each of the pelts. An interesting case is pending in the New York Supreme Court which involves $200,000. Two little boys, who were heirs to a considerable fortune, were drowned while skating. The relatives arc now trying to prove which one died first, and upon this depends the settle ment of the money. Major Burke, the manager of Buffalo Bill’s Wild West Show, says a seasick Indian is the drollest thing afloat. First he gets on his knees and sings a death chant. Then he dances a war dance. And finally lays himself down content to die in his moc r '~ ins, a thing every re spectable, scalp-loving Indian abhors. It is not often that such a little matter as three minutes stand between a man and the penitentiary. Yet that was the case in Toledo, Ohio, the other day, when it was shown that a theft was com mitted just that period of time before sunset, and hence was petty larceny not a burglary. Great is the ingenuity of th< lawyer. A SIOO,OOO mill, for the manufactun of sugar, salt and pepper, is now being built at Arkalon, Kan. For three months it will make sugar from sorgham, then work up the cane chips into paper, and the rest of the time turn out bushels and bushels of salt. To encourage sorghum sugar-making the Kansas Legislature ha« exempted all sugar plants from taxation until 1895. The military authorities at Berlin art beginning to practically utilize the bal loon for war purposes. At Tempelhof, where the balloons are made,rope-makers are hard at work, and a tailor shop has been erected, where the balloons are cut and sewn. In another shop they art made waterproof and dried, and on a fine day a number of soldiers sit in front ol the tents occupied in making nets. The courts of Boston decided a day or two ago that the law could not permit a local collecting bureau to persecute delin quent debtors by sending after them agents gotten up as corpses in burlesque grave clothes. The notion was not only ingenious, but humorous as well, convey ing a cheerful suggestion of pursuing the deadbeat even to the tomb. But some of the victims did not enjoy being followed iround by imitation cadavers, an I so the business was put a stop to. the settling up is certain. You may take the world as it comes and goes, And you will be sure to find That fate will square the account she owes, Whoever comes out behind; And all tilings bad that a man has done, By whosoever induced, Return at last to him, one by one, As the chickens come home to roost. You may scrape and toil aud pinch and save While your hoarded wealth expands, Till the oold, dark shadow of the grave Is nearing your life's last sands; You will have your balances struck some night, And you’ll find your hoard reduced. You’ll view your life iu another light, When the chickens come home to roost. You can stint you soul and starve you heart With the husks of a barren creed, But God will know if you play a part, Will know in your hour of need; And then as you wait for death to come What hope can there he deduced From a creed alone? You will lie there dumb. While your chickens come home to roost. Sow as you will, there’s a time to reap, For the good and the had as well, And conscience, whether we wake or sleep, Is either a heaven or hell. And every wrong will find its place, And every passion loosed Drifts back and meets you face to face, When the chickens come home to roost. Whether you’re over or under the sod, The result will be the same; You cannot escape the hand of God; You must bear your sin or shame. No matter what’s carved on a marble slab, When the items are all produced, You’ll find that St. Peter was keeping tab, And that chickens come home to roost. —Ernest McGaffey, in Inter-Ocean. THE THREE PASSENGERS. A STOUT OF THE SEA. I entered the service of the United Com pany when only fourteen years of age. The United Company was an organization of English and Chinese capitalists at Shanghai which exported teas and other commodities. It h’ad at one time eleven vessels, eight of which were small schoon ers and brigs, which were empoyed in visiting ports along the coast and various islands iu the China Sea and Pacific Ocean. It is of my first trip lam going to tell you about. I had run away to sea on a vessel bound from Liverpool to Shanghai, aud had left her on arrival. I found that the Captain of the Silver Crown, one of the com pany’s traders, was an old friend of my father’s, and so it came about that I took service iu the company under him with the rating of cabin boy. The Crown was a fine new fore-and-aft schooner, carrying % crew of eight men, all told. She had a native cook, but all the others were for •iguers. The Captain, mate, and myself Kere EnnrlGE -- * • > #nd the other two were Swedes. While t rated as cabin boy, I had to assist in failing the vessel, and was a sort of clerk to the Captain. The schooner carried a dozen muskets, a lot of boarding pikes, and half a dozen cutlasses as an arma ment, but everything was boxed up and Btored away, if not forgotten. Captain Wharton had been in the service for six years, and had never met with any trouble. When we got away it was with orders for the Philippine Islands, among which the company had many resident agents who collected products. Our course was to the southeast, to pass between For mosa and the Loo-Choo Islands, and we hud made the run thus far without inci dent, when one day about noon a junk rigged native craft, which doubtless came from some port in Formosa, intercepted us to the eastward of that island. We were about thirty miles off shore when she hailed us. She claimed to be short of water, owing to an accident; but this, as we afterward came to know, was only an excuse. When she found that we were bound to the Philippines she had three passengers to transfer. They were three natives of Formosa, who wore going down there to form a colony, and would pay liberally for a passage by the schoon er. They claimed to have contracted with the junk for the round trip, but she had spruug a leak aud must return to port. I am only giving you the gist of what was offered in excuse. We lay to for a couple of hours* and I heard only a part of what was said. It did not seem t« strike Captain Wharton or Mate Will iams ns queer or suspicious, aud after haggling over terms for a while the threo natives were transferred to our decks and the vessels separated. Then I had time to look the strangers over, and I was not long in concluding that I did not wish for an intimate acquaintance. They were a tough looking trio, and the cook had scarcely set eyes on them before he de 1 dared that we had made a great mistake in taking them aboard. We had no ac commodations for them aft, and ns the Bchooner was in ballast they had agreed to occupy the hold. This wasn't such a bad place with the hatches off, and they looked like fellows used to roughing it ashore and afloat. I took an early opportunity of com municating my suspicions to the Captain, but he laughed at me in a good-natured way. I tried the mate, but he saw noth ing to arouse distrust. It was singular, however, that every man of the crew out side of the two officers was satisfied that there was something wrong with the trio. While their excuse was reasonable enough, the looks and actions of the men were suspicious, and it was plain to all that they were sailors. They let us all severely alone except the Captain and the ccok, and I called it to mind afterward that while one interested the former the other two were occupied with the latter. I could I 'chin-chin” a bit and the cook could speak a little English, and so we managed to understand each other pretty well. Three days after the men came aboard “Slop-Slip."’ as we called the cook, assured me with very serious face that the strangem were evil-minded men, who had planned to capture the sqiioouer. They had asked him to join them, and he had refused. I posted off to the Captain with the news, and he greeted it with contempt. “If you and the cook have nothing better to do, I’ll put you to rubbing the rust off the auchor chain,” he gruffiy re plied. The mate also laughed at me, but when I went quietly among the men every one of them was rc idy to believe. Each one had noticed something to arouse his suspicions, but in the absence of orders we could do nothing but wait for what might turn up. We were getting well down toward the northernmost island of the group, when something happened which should have opened the Captain’s eyes. The leader of the three borrowed the glasses and went up to the crosstrees of the mainmast aud took a long look around. We saw the sailor in his every move, and he had not been down an hour when a native craft came creeping up from the south, bows on to us. She had a free wind, while we had been beating down all the forenoon. We were at this time forty or fifty miles to the northward of the group, with a beautiful afternoon and a smooth sea. Half an hour after the native craft had been sighted, one of the natives and the Captain retired to the cabin. Five minutes later the native showed his head above the deck and called to the mate, who had just come on watch. He disappeared down the companion way,aud at the same time I entered the forecastle to look for something wanted. 1 was down there about five minutes. I heard no particular row on deck, but when I reappeared I was struck dumb by the spectacle. One of the natives was at the wheel, and was bringing the schooner into the wind to lie to. The decapitated bodies of the two Americans and the cook were lying amidships, while the two Swedes were at the foremast cross trees. Not a shout had been raised nor aery uttered. The work had been done with terrible rapidity and in silence. As I reached the deck oue of the na tives came forward with a bloody creese in his hand and called me “good boy,” and said I should not be hurt. He left me sitting on the windlass so scared and weak that I could not stand, aud then as sisted his companions to lower the sails. When this had been accomplished they called to the Swedes to come down. The poor fellows began crying and lamenting, and refused to descend. The natives picked up the bodies from the deck and tossed them overboard, and then de scended to the cabin and brought up the bodies of Captain and mate and served them the same way. Both had been killed by the one native who enticed them down. About the time the last body was flung over the rail the native craft drew along side. .She had thirty men on board, all of whom seemed to know our three pas sengers and their plans. There was great rejoicing over the capture of the schooner, and for a quarter of an hour no one paid me any attention. Then there was a hot discussion, a part of the gang seeming was the cook s galley arid given to und<J®hd that I was to do the cooking. Although our cook was a Chinese they did not spare him. What saved me was my youth, or they might have planned to cut my throat after I had served their turm £ my fate had been settled the ;s were again ordered down. One of them descended, begging and plead ing, but he was cut down the moment his feet touched the deck. The other re fused to come down, aud half a dozen natives fan \lp the foremast shrouds with knives in their hands. Before they could reach him the sailor made his way hand over hand along the triantic stay to the mainmast. His feat was greeted with applause, but others ascended, and there was no longer any hope for him. The poor fellow made the best defence possible, but they cut and hacked him until he lost his hold and fell to the deck. His bodv wa9 thrown overboard, deck and cabins cleansed of blood stains, and about sundown the schooner,with twenty five men, was headed for the Philippines. The rest of the gang, numbering seven or eight, followed with the native craft, I boiled a large quantity of meat and got the best supper possible, and was glad to find that no one gave me any attention. We had a brisk wind all night and during the next forenoon, and at about 2 o'clock we reached an'anchorage on the east side of the main island and within a quarter of a mile of the beach. The native craft passed us and entered the mouth of a river. From what I could gather she was going to bring out men and cannon to the schooner. A hunt was made through the schooner for gun car ! riages, and the discovery of the small 1 arms seemed to put the fellows in good humor. There wa* about $2500 in gold aboard in the cabin, and this was counted out ard divided pro rata,or in some other satisfactory manner as we lay at anchor. Then I was ordered to draw a pailful of wine from a cask in a sort of lazaretto or storeroom, reached from the galley. The cook might hfive known of the presence of the wine there, but I did not. 1 had i never looked into the place. There was a tin pail, holding about ten quarts,in the galley, and this I filled and carried to the main hatch) with several glasses, and i everybody proceeded to help himself, j Now that we were at anchor all discipline had ceased, and one man w;»3 as good as ! another. They w&rc prowling all over the schooner, and perfectly at home. The wine must have tickled ther pal- ates mightily, for a second pailful was soon demanded. It was while I was drawing it that I noticed the barrel had no bung in it, aud I wondered why the wine had not soured. I retired to the galley as soon as I had filled the second order, and for half an hour there was a | great deal of loud talk and laughter. All j of a sudden,while I was reflecting on the j situation, and perhaps crying a bit in my sorrow aud anxiety, it struck me that things were wonderfully quiet. I looked out of the galley to see half a dozen fig ures lying on the deck, and later on,when I had summoned courage to walk the length of the schooner, I found every man aboard apparently asleep. Their breathing was labored, but I supposed this wa» the result of too much drink. The night had come down dark and gusty, with the wind directly off shore,' and as the sleepers continued to lie quiet some strange ideas came to me. I was tempted to take one of their knives and begin killing, but doubted my nerve. The yawl was at the davits, and I planned to lower it and let the breeze carry me out to sea. I held to this idea for a few minutes, and then surrendered it for an other. I would swim ashore and hide in the forest. I had to abandon that scheme ns well, for I saw at a glance that the tide was running out strong. I was wondering if I should not start a fire in the forecastle or cabin when I discovered that the craft was under way. She had her light anchor out and had been tug ging heavily under the tide and gust. The chain had ground off against some sharpedged rock or the pin had slipped from a shackle. It was probably the lat ter case, as I heard a splash as of the end of the chain falling from the hawe hole. She drove off stern first and then, as she began to swing about, I stepped softly back to the wheel, put it over to get her off, and then extinguished the two lan terns on deck aud the lamp in the cabin. lam not boasting of my nerve in stepping over the sleepers to do this work or of my sagacity in getting the idea. I was working like one in a dream and could hardly have identified myself. What occurred between the time I put out the lights and daylight next morning, I never can clearly remember. The schooner took care of herself for any ef fort of mine, and I think I went into the galley and crept behind the stove. At least I crawled out of that contracted space soon after daylight, in response to a call. I suppose I was called to prepare breakfast for the pirates, hut I .was no sooner out of the galley than I saw a large ship hove to a quarter of a mile away, while one of her boats, with five men in it, was alongside the schooner. I must have looked and acted like a stupid, fo» as a couple of men came over the rail one of them gave me a hearty shaking and growled out; “You idiot, cau’t you get your mouth open?” There were twenty-five men lying on the decks and in the cabin sound asleep. No! Dead! Every one of them dead and cold, and I the only living thing aboard. It took some time to explain matters and get at all the particulars, but with what I could tell them and what they could sen it finally became plain to all. That bar rel of wine had been dosed with some, deadly drug. The cook must have done 1 it previous to the attack, or the bung had been left out by another, and some poi sonous reptile had crept iu to die. No oue could tell for certain, but the drink ers were all dead, and all had died in sleep. Th'e ship was English, and the schooner was over thirty miles off the land. One of 11. M. men-of-war, as sisted by a civil functionary, attempted an investigation, but nothing came of it. Our crew had been slaughtered and the schooner captured, but she had recaptured corpses. "'Not VfWHht fouud among the islands who would acknowledge that he had ever seen the schooner, much less participated in hei capture. —Mem York Sun. The Loving Memory of Dogs. The late Mr. Eyre, a clergyman, left, a dog, which was -very much attached to him, at the country-house of a friend while he left England for a long sojourn abroad. After two years Mr. Eyre re turned, arriving at his friend's house late at night, and retiring without having the dog called. Next morning, Mr. Eyre was awakened by the dog bursting into his bedroom and leaping upon him with the wildest dem onstrations of delight. “How on earth did he know I had ar rived?” asked the gentleman of the ser vant, who brought hot water. “Oh, sir,” the man replied, “it is the most curious thing 1 As I was cleaning your boots the dog recognized them and became excited beyond measure, and I have not been able to quiet him until he saw where I was carrying them, and rushed Up along with me to your door.” A correspondent of the same English paper relates that he gave way, at a year old, a dog which he was unable to keep in his London home. After eight years the dog was returned to its first owner. “The dog met me,” says the correspon dent, “at first as a stranger, and then, with little animated sniffs of inquiry, go iug round and round me. I remained still for a few moments, while she grew more and more exCited. At last I stooped and patted her, and called her by hei name: ‘Dee.’ “On hearing my voice the poor beast gave what I can only describe as a scream jof rapture and jumped into my arms. From that moment she attached herself to me as if she had never left me, and with tire tenderest devotion.”— Zoophilist. A Family of Age and Weight. Three brothers were in New Bruns wick, N. J., recently, who show a heavy aggregate in height, age and size. They are Captain Samuel Acken, who is 6 feet inches in height, seventy-six years of age, and weighs 240 pounds; William Acken, of Metuchcn.who is C feet 3 inches in height, eighty-six years of age, and weighs 220 pounds, and Henry Acken, of Raritan, who measures 6 feet 2 inches, weighs 200 pounds, and is eighty-four years of age. The joint weight of these Middlesex brothers is, therefore, 660 pounds, their total height 18 feet 11-i inches, and their combined ages amount to 24C years. What is equally notice able is the fact that the Acken family is a family of giants, among the younger as well as the older generations. Freeholder Acken is the biggest official in Middlesex County and stands head and shoulders over the other members of the Board, and there are ms ny young men and boys, ai) I of whom are tall, aud most of whom arc •as remarkable in weight as in height.— ! New York Times. The British Government will devote $60,000,000 to the improvement of the national defences. THE CITY OF THE MOGULS -A MARVELS OF MAN’S HANDIWORK IN DELHI, THE ROME OF ASIA. Magnificent Halls of Marble—The Fa mous Peacock Throne—A Won derful Tower—Stores of Delhi. Delhi, for the past three thousand years the Home of Asia, possesses a his tory dating back to the mythical period of the Aryans. The city is situated on the banks of the Jumna, just outside the Northwest Province and within the boundary of the Punjab. It has suc cumbed seven times to attack, and as often risen again to dominion and grand eur. Delhi owes her present renown tc the extravagant ideas and abject cruelty of Sha Jehan, who swayed the rod of empire from 1627 to 1658. The Great I ort, the Dewan-i-Kas, or hall of private audience, the Motoe Musjid, the Mosque of Pearls and the “Grown of the World,” the Taj Mahal at Agra, built for the last resting place of the fair Persian Queen of the ruthless Emperor, all stand as eu logies to perpetuate his name. The fort is a little less than two miles in circuit, aud its walls rise forty feet from tire ground; inside this inelosure are the most superb and costly buildings of Hindu stan. Entering by the Lahore, now Vic toria Gate, succeeded by a long vaulted ailse, which at present is utilized by the native hawkers for the display of theii wares to the English soldiers who occupy the citadel, the Hall of Public Audience and the-Pearl Mosque stand out against the clear Asiatic sky, bringing to mind the productions of Geromc and Constant, who have immortalized the scenes of Eastern luxury. Pre-eminent among these marvels of man’s handicraft is the Hall of Private Audience, which com mands an extensive view of the silent Jumna ana L.j. pause of rolling plain.' The hall is of marble, at the sides and supported by pillars rich in precious stone aud gold mosaic and carving. At each corner rises a kiosk, composed of the same material as the building, and the ceiling is decorated r. ith gold and silver filigree work. The culmination of all splendor is attained in the Takt-i-Taus, the famous Peacock Throne, which stood in the centre of the palatial chamber be fore its destruction by the Persian Nadir Shaj in the early part of the last century. It is formed of a mass of gold wrought in the form of two peacocks with dis tended tails, fashioned to life with dia monds, sapphires, rubies, emeralds, and suspended between them a parrot of nor mal size. This regal seat was perfected at a cost of six crores, or sixty millions of rupees, nominally about thirty million dollars. The Jumna Musjid— i. e. , the Friday mosque, that day being the Mo hammedan Sabbath—contains a large quadrangle 450 feet square, approached ou three sides by broad sandstone steps. A small fountain in the centre gives forth a constant stream of cold crystal water for the ablutions of the faithful. On entiredeirginUfi"iiYe'Udiw, tby three white marble domes, which are capped with gilded spires, At the ex tremities two minarets, alternately striped with sandstone and marble, perfect the symmetry of the religious edifice. To westward, toward Mecca, the mid dlebuilding lies open,aud on Fridays the vast area is crowded with worshippers, principally men,for. according to the Mo hammedan education, women have no souls; they live for and are the property of men, the Koran permitting a man to have four wives, to say nothing qf concu bines. A drive of some hours brings us to the Kutub Minar, written monument. Having passed through one deserted city after another, some containing a few buildings in a tolerable state of preserva tion, it is not strange that this tower should seem of such colossal height Un doubtedly it was erected in the middle of the Dark Ages, and was one of the won ders of the period. At the base it meas ures 100 feet iu circumference,and gradu ally diminishes in a scries of five stories to thirty feet at the summit. In dose prox imity to this “Pillar of Victory” are the ruins of a mosque built from the remains of a previous religious building. At the time of the acquisition of the Punjab ter ritory by the English, anti in the battles which prefaced it, among other spoils caine the Kohinoor diamond, now the property of Queen Victoria. The stores and bazaars are all built on the main street, Chandee Chowk, running from the entrance of the imperial jjalace to the Lahore Gate. These stores contain pro ducts varying in value—lacquer ware from Sind, silken shawls from Kash mir, and carved sandal-wood jewel cases. The bankers fern no small part of the motley throng, the city be ing the principal money-mart of Southern Asia, since the bronze-colored financiers extend their dealings over Arabia, Afghanistan, Turkistan and Thibet. The shoemakers, their stores laden with hun dreds of brightly decorated trappings for the feet, carry on a thriving trade with their eager customers. Delhi being a money centre, the goldsmiths find it profitable to locate their shops with the others aud exhibit jeweled and metalic work surpassing in actual quality and delicacy of manufacture the productions of the best Parisian or American estab lishments. The “bowlee,” or well-house, was formerly a favorite retreat for the rich during the intense heat of the slim mer. It consists of a large stone build ing, built around a deep well, resembling a small pond in size. Almost all of it has fallen into a state of decay, and the remains are only used by the urchins aud indolent men as a means of deriving a livelihood by leaping from the domes down into the slimy stagnant water. For this foolhardy act the tourists and foreign residents give them three or four annas, virtually about a cent, and for this pit tance they will often jump eighty feet, without sustaining the least injury.— New York Post. The Emperor of Germany has just ob tained a raise in salary. One million dollars has just been ip ve red in tunnels at Olean, N. Y. THE GREATER WORLD. When you forget the beauty of the scene Where you draw breath and sleep, Leave city walls for gleams of sky that lean To hills where forests creep. The heights, the fields, the wide-winged air Make the embracing day; Not city streets. That little life of care Steals our great joys away. Live with the spaces, wake with bird and cloud, Spread sentiment with the elm; Our home is nature, even to the proud Arcs of the sunset’s realm. Then say the scene God made is glorious! Breath deep aud smile again. The glow an 1 noble dusks, victorious, Disperse regrets and pain. —Rose H. Latlirop, in Scribner. HUMOR OF THE DAY. Fish arc not weighed in their own scales. A stock operation—Milking the cows. —Merchant Traveler. Speaking of book-binding, dictionaries ought to be spell-bound. The blacksmith ought to be able to give a slioer tip on horses. The polecat has only one life, but the other eight are not missed. Charged with electricity—The sub scribers to the Bell ’telephone. Wisps of straw by the hay scales are bits that have fallen by the weigh side. It takes a good many strikes to make a base-ball match go off well.— Siftings. The fidelity of adversity is exemplified by the manner in which poverty sticks to the poet. The young idea may sometimes be best taught to shoot by putting it through a A/Miwm of onrnnts An “octave” dinner is the laresi iaau ionable craze. The guests arrive after everything is ate up. Down on the Rio Grande a horse thief stole a runaway mule that nobody else could catch.— Siftings. Little drops of water. Little lumps of chalk, Take their occupation From the bovine stock. —Merchant Traveler. Some people are called weak-minded because it takes them at least seven days to make up their minds. —Somerville Jour nal. Ordinarily the ministers create the Benedicts, but at the White House the Ben-edicts create the ministers.— Hotel Mail. When a young man proposes and is ac cepted he rings the girl’s hand. If he is refused he wrings his own hands.— Statesman. Berlin is a bad place to choose for an important conference, for it is a notorious fact that its inhabitants arc always on the Spree.— Baltimore American. The doctor sits in bis office chair, A paradox, strange to see, For VhOHrJ’uJ'pdis hj n waitinfr a call. j inij —GoodalV s Sun. sheriff has j^ 0 P s . iß “” bro} <e up. The Jangs—“ls that’*sos hlB mcat market -” morning, and I tWjght h® aW tlna he’d lost flesh. ’'-t-LoUsjj 213 A ship and a baker are n. . Would you know the reaso. fake; The first you see has a pilot on T.hy? Aud the last has a lot of pie. r d* — Goodall's is Sir Rotten Rowe—-“I thought didn’t have bishops sitting in the Ameri can Senate?” Mr. Madison Squeer— “We don’t.” Sir Rotten Rowe —“Then who does the confirmations the papers speak of?”— Puck. HOW SHE DROVE THE NAIL. - She hit the nail a fearful whack— I mean to say, she tried; She bathed her thumb with arnica. And then sat down and cried. —The Epoch. She (at a party)—“Did that rich bachelor, Captain Rudder, get his title in the army?” He—“ Guess not. A few moments ago I saw him duck his head when the servant announced Mr. Low bridge.”—Philadelphia Record. Angling for Pie.—Mrs. Salstonstall (of Boston) —“Tommy, will you have a piece of mince pie?” Tommy Beacon street (who is taking dinner out)— “Yes’m, and I trust that your apportion ment will be commensurate with my esteem for yourself.”— Burlington Free Pres*. Young Mr. Brokaw (who believes in doing everything in a business-like way) “Miss Southmayd, I am matrimonially inclined. You arc my-choicc above all women. I desire to marry you. Is it a go?” Miss Southmayd (freezingly)— “Yes, sir. There is the door.”—Burling ton Free Press. “I think that armchair is a beauty,” said the old man, who was in the parlor with his daughter and her young man; “it looks almost large enough to hold two." “0, yes, sir,"spoke up the young man, “it is plenty large enough.” And then he relapsed into a state of innocu ous desuetude, while his blushes turned the ice water on the table into a bright cochineal red.— Lawrence American. Guinea Cows. Lowndes County, Ga., produces a lit tle cow which is indeed a curiosity. It is the same distance in height, length and width, and is supported by legs uot more than twelve inches in length. It bears the name of the guinea cow. The first were brought here from Spain by an old Spaniard who came to this country be fore the war. The cow is very small and chunky, but it keeps rolling fat on al most nothing, and is a splendid milker, the average giving from three to three and a half gallons of milk per day. Mr. R. L. Stapler has a herd of fifty perfect little beauties. Hh disposes of young cows for SIOO each, which almost equals the price paid for Jerseys. While their milk is not so rich as the Jersey, the peo ple there prefer the guinea. —Atlanta Con stitution. Over $2,000,000 are paid annually into Philadelphia church treasuries for pew ren‘s iu the different houses of worship.