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THE TRIBUNE. VOL. I. A SMILE TO WIN AND HEART TO WOO. The world is broad and the world is long. There’s agroiui of pain and a, snatch of song. 'There’s a sky that’s dark, and a Sky that’s blue. There’s a breast that's false and a breast that’s true; But above all else there’s a hand for you. There’s a smile to win and a heart to woo. The world is round and the world is deep. There's ft day of toil and a night of sleep. There’s an hour of pain and a day of fear. Thoro’s a week of peace and a month of oheer; But above all else there’s a hand for you. There’s a smile to win and a heart to woo. Tho world is sad and the world is gay. There’s a time to work and a time to play. There’s a thorn of woe and a word of love. There’s a sigh that startles tho cooing dove; But above all else there’s a hand for you. There’s a smile to win and a heart to woo. Tho world is bright and the world Is sweet. There's a resting halm for the many feet. There’s a bed of down and a spot of ease. There’s a look to cheer and a voice to please; But above all else there’s a hand for you. There’s a smile to win and a heart to woo. —F. Don Hobkrtson. Dans Predicament. • “Well, good-bye. Yqp will fall a victim, I have not the slightest doubt, to Emmeline’s charms.” “Yes; but will she allow herself to be charmed?” “Not if she’s wise. But here is your train. Goodbye; and if ydu break your heart the great remedy for such complaints is change of scene, yon know’. If I hear of you in Africa I shall understand what has happened.” The speakers shook hands. He found a place in the train, and she made her way again to the pony carriage in which she had driven him to the sta¬ tion, his farewell words not having been perhaps exactly what they would have been if spoken in the hearing a less limited audience. • “What an idiot he is!” she said to herself,, and then she laughed. The epithet w r ould not have wounded the feelings of the most sensitive of mor¬ tals had he read aright the laugh that followed it. “Poor George!” xvas with a sigh her next ‘Comment, and a grave look clouded her bright face. George was the husband for whom her mourning had now reached the lavender and white stage. Poor George he had never - liked her cousin, But there was no harm in Dau, absolutely none. The pony took his time through the hedge-shaded lanes—hedges gar¬ landed with wild roses and honey¬ suckle. Three days afterwards the post brought a letter, among others, that was read over more than once by the recipient. It ran after this wise: Dear Lydia— Wofds spoken in jest,as you and the Greeks say, ooino true. I am en¬ gaged to Miss Winterton., Emmeline—for so I have a right now to call her—made me the happiest of men by accepting me this morning. I feel X cannot lot a post go with¬ out telling yon my news. When I think of how we made a subject for ridicule and mer¬ riment of an object to me now so precious, I indeed come to theconclusion that my fate is better than I deserve. Yours, always affec¬ tionately, S.—Emmeline D. Forbes. P. sends her best love, and counts upon your presence at tho wedding. Lydia’s red and white grew very vivid as she read this communication the first time. On the second perusal, w'hite predominated; on the third, her color suddenly returned, and she laughed. .. He is a silly creature,” she told herself; “I will give him a good time in revenge. He deserves it. How could I be so foolish as to be taken in? Emmeline! Absurd! Poor old Emmeline, with her dust cloak and bag Lydia of keys,” down her sat to writing-table, and, looking very much pleased with herself all the while, wrote as follows: My Dear Dan — I do no: deny that your note took mo a little by surprise, but I am very, very glad (three underlines to each very) of what you toll me. Of course, our foolish little jokes meant nothing. In fact, as a blind, people often joke about those they like best. I think Emmeline is most admirably calculated to mako you happy, and I send my sincerost good wishes for your future life. Always, dear Dan, with love to Emmeline. Your affectionate cousin, Lctia Brackenbury. P.S.—Please give tlie enclosed note to Mrs. Winterton. I cannot forbear writing just a line to her to say how much your engage¬ ment. of which I have heard from you, pleases me. She will be so glad about it her¬ self, I know. Captain Forbes was at breakfast when Lydia’3 letter was brought to him. The Winterton family were ranged round the table, and without reading his own document, lie handed at once to Mrs. Winterton the note enclosed and addressed to her in his cousin’js handwriting. Then he read “ Don’t C3-1^7 -o ITp tlio Slaip. XI BUCHANAN, GA., FRIDAY, MAY 13. 1898. what she had written to him, nnd his usually lively color turned to a posi¬ tive gray. This was awful. He had given to Mrs. Winterton a letter to say how much pleased Lydia was to have heard from him of liis engage¬ ment to her daughter. What a fright¬ ful perdicameut to be in! He looked to the head of the table where Mrs. Winterton, a most grim, stiff and pro¬ priety-loving specimen of the British mother, sat behind the teapot. He looked across to Emmeline in her prim, unattractive, old-maidish, latter youth. How should he ever get out of this? Of course the letter was all nonsense. There hadn’t been a word of truth in it. How could there have been? Really, Lydia might have known. He had certainly taken a long time to compose the effusion and to make it seem as real as possible; but to whom would it have occurred, even if she had believed such a monstrous impossibility, that she would have gone and written off on the spur of the moment to the old woman? And she didn’t seem to care one straw. She believed such an outrageously im¬ possible thing, without the least hesi¬ tation or distress! It was nothing to her; evidently nothing at all. Good heavens! what a position; what in the world was he to do? He scarcely dared look again towards Mrs. Winterton as she read the most unfortunate and ill- conceived epistle. How furious the woman would be. He would have to apologize, He would have to ex- plain that it w r as only a joke; Only a joke! that was a pleasant explanation to have to make. Well, he had been in some nasty predicaments before in his life, but this outvied them all. As soon as the women had left the room, the door of which he had held opeu for them with the most hang-dog air that human being ever wore, Cap¬ tain Forbes sought refuge in the shrubbery, and racked his brains to determine upon the best course of con¬ duct to be pursued under the present terrific condition of affairs. He had best, he speedly concluded, go and have it out with the old woman and get it over. There was nothing to be gained by waiting. It was indeed past praying for. Thereupon he retraced his steps, and met Mrs. Winterton, as luck w r ould have it, immediately in the hall. “May I speak to you for a moment, Mrs. Winterton?” be asked. Mrs. Winterton acceded to the re¬ quest. She w - as always stiff and for¬ mal, and whether there was much stiffness and formality added to what was usual the unhappy man was too much embarrassed to rightly deter¬ mine. , “I am sure I am exceedingly sorry that it should have happened,” he be¬ gan, as soon as he found himself in the drawing-room. “Had I bad the faintest idea that my cousin would take it in that way, and that this would have occurred, I don’t know what I wouldn’t sooner have doue than write that letter.” Mrs. Winterton made no reply. Her pale, cold blue eyes were fixed upon Captain Forbes’ agi¬ tated countenance. “She gives no help,” he thought, “and certainly I don’t deserve it. Ass that I was. ‘Delirious ass,’ as Macgregor would say. You see,” he went hesitating and stammering on, “my cousin, Mrs. Brackenbury, did not understand that it was a joke, or, of course, she wouldn’t have written to you treating the matter seriously. No one can more regret than I do that I took Miss Winterton’s name in such a way. Yon must think it quite unpardonable.” “I do not quite understand you, Cajrtain Forbes,” Hrs. Winterton re¬ plied, in her rigid, frozen voice. “I do not quite understand to what you are alluding.” “I am alluding to my cousin’s letter to you that she enclosed in one to me. I gave it to you, not for an instant supposing that she had taken seriously what I said about my engagement to your daughter,” Captain Forbes answered, with the it’s-no-use-beat- ing-about-the-bush feeling now upper¬ most in bis distracted mind. Mrs. Winterton regarded him with a most withering expressing. “Am I to understand from you Cap¬ tain Forbes,” she inquired, “that you have Mrs. been amusing yourself, writing to Brackenbury to inform her as a joke that you were about to become the husband of my daughter?” “I kuovv it was abominable of me,” Captain Forbes said. “I see perfectly that it was wholly unjustifiable, and I regret my most atrociously idiotic let¬ ter more than words can say. ” “Yours,certainly, seems an ill-timed pleasantry, ” Mrs. Winterton answered,, her blue eyes colder and her icy man¬ ner icier than ever, “and I should have known nothing of the nature oi' youif humor had you not kindly explained it to me. There was no word referring to vour joke in Mrs. Brackenbury’s letter.” Poor Captain Forbes, “delirious ass” twice over he told himself. li he’d held his tongue, the old woman would have known nothing. He might, he thought, have trusted Lydia not to have been deceived in the way that, during the shock of his sudden dis¬ may, he had supposed. But it was too bad of her. In the sanctuary of his own room, he drew writing materi¬ als to him again and sent her a briefer letter this time than the first had been. “You have got me into a horrible hole,” he wrote, “and I never felt such a fool in my life. I am going back to London at once.” The next morning he found a tele- gram waiting for him at liis club, “When do you start ior Africa?” “She is really a little wretch,” he thought, smiling. But he could for- give anything better than that she should have received calmly, even gladly, the announcement of his ell- gagement to—well, to everybody, not only to poor Emmeline, in fact. “I start for Africa next week,” ^ he telegraphed. “Shall I come and see you first?” . . If you like,” the answer came. Tliere was no going to Africa for him.—New York Ledger. Tlie Kaiser and His Nicknames. There is a story told in the English Illustrated in connection with the German emperor, and his nicknames. In the course of conversation at a reg¬ imental dinner at which the Duke of Connaught was present the Kaiser said: “They call me the Traveling Kaiser, don’t they? I.wonder if that’s the only nickname I’ve got?” Prince Henry laughed, and Major von Ples- sen, unable to control himself, joined him. “What is it?” asked the Empe¬ ror. “Do you know of any other nickname? If so, out with it.” The major mumbled something about bis respect, but the emperor said, “Well, if you don’t want to do it to please me,-1 command you to speak.” The major then confessed that the empero^ was known' among the com¬ mon soldiers as “Alarm Fritz,” on account of his habit of suddenly, in the middle of the night, rousing the ■garrison of the town in which he might be staying. The emperor laughed heartily at this, and Prince Henry remarked to his brother, “Well, you have a similar mime in the navy! The boys call you ‘Gondola Billy,’ for gondoling about, as they call it, on your ships constantly in the summer, and being everywhere and anywhere on the boats.” “Well,” said the em¬ peror, “those are three fine nick¬ names; but inasmuch as all of them paint me as a busy man, I rather like them.” A Paradise for tlie Poor. London will scon become the ideal home of the poor man. Lord Bowton, the well-known private secretary of the late Lord Beacousfield, is extending in every direction in the vast British metropolis his eminently successful scheme of cheap hotels, built and run on the same lines as the Mills hotels in this city, and now Sir Thomas Lip- ton has made arrangements to follow suit by establishing all over London restaurants of an analogous character, where substantial and good meals can be obtained for cost price. It is not proposed to run these restaurants at a loss, but neither is it intended to-run them at a profit.—New York Tribune. Bright Excuses. “Shiftless as ever, Thomas?” said the wealthy uncle. “Still making a failure of life, as you always have done?” “I don’t know that I’m such a ter¬ rible failure,” sulkily answered the poor relation. “Why, you have nobody but your¬ self to support, and you can’t make both ends meet.” “Well, the rainbow has only itself to support and it doesn’t make both ends meet, either.”—Chicago Trib¬ une. Has 235 I.iving Children. Mrs. Sallie Shiver, who lives near Albany, Ga., has 235 living children, grandchildren, great-grandchildren and great-great-grandchildren. In addition to these 75 of the old lady’s descendants are dead, making the total number 310. Maine people are shipping pine cones to the treeless plains of the West. HYPNOTISM IN INDIA. So Say* Till* Man Concerning: the Tricks of Jugglers. A correspondent writing fromTndia regarding the theory that the jugglers perform their tricks by “will power,” says; “During the course of the In¬ dian mutiny .1 made the acquaintance of one of these gentlemen of India, w ho tried to instruct me how to per¬ form these tricks. He said it was all imaginary on the part of the specta¬ tors, as lie simply willed that they should see those things. Yet I, in common with Western nations w r as too auimalized and materialized, by flesh-eating and consumption of alco¬ hol, to retain or accept any deep spir- itual teaching, •‘The most exciting performance that he gave for my amusement was the converting of a bamboo stick iuto a native servant. Afterward—in his absence—I tried it on, and to my sur- prise the same man was before me asking for instructions. I directed him to till the chatties on the veranda with water from the well in the com- p 0U nd. This ha proceeded to do. when he had filled them all to over- flowing I requested him to stop. He, however, took no notice of me, and went on stolidly bringing in the water, until, in my excited imagination, it seemed that the bungalow, would be washed away. Finding that I could not arrest or stop his movements, he passing through me as though p did not exist, I drew my sword and lay in wait for him. Making a slash, 1 ap- parently cut him in twain, when lo ! there were two men bringing in water, neither of whom could I restrain or prevent from doing so. “I was completely out of my depth, when I heard a quiet laugh behind me, and on turning I found it was my instructor, who held up, liis right hand, and the two men disappeared, the stick resuming its place on the ver- anda, and to crown all, there was not the slightest sign of any water having been brought in. I excitedly ap¬ pealed to him for an explanation. He said that he had been present all the time, having willed that he should be invisible to me, and that I should im¬ agine myself to see and do what I thought had taken place. In order to prove it, he asked me to step out iuto the compound, and directed my atten¬ tion to a huge cavern, which I knew was not there before. As 1 entered a number of huge elephants and camels issued from it in a continuous stream, yet I could not touch one of them. They apparently passed over me as though I did not exist. He again raised his hand, and the cavern and animals disappeared, and there was no indication of au exodus of any kind.” For Thin Folk. Eat for breakfast oatmeal swimming in cream. Drink not tea or coffee,but cocoa, chocolate and milk. Spurn toast- especially if it be made of graham or gluten bread. Eat freshly made wheat bread, with batter and honey. Eat fruit for your breakfast, but not the tart grape and the tartar grape food. Eat baked apples with plenty of sugar and cream, and all sorts of stewed fruits which require sweeten¬ ing. Eat meats with fat on them. Eat fisli with white sauces. Eat potatoes, cornstarch, simple puddings and ice¬ creams. Drink milk and cream whenever you happen to want them. If you dou’t care for these nourishing drinks, cultivate a taste for them. Avoid lem¬ onade, lime juice, and the like. Wear warm, luxurious clothing, but be careful not to have it so warm as to induce perspiration, for that will prove flesh reducing. Do not let it be too heavy, either. Don’t worry. Don’t lie awake at night to think about your shortcom¬ ings and other people’s sins. Use of London Fogs. Until now people have been at a loss to discover the use of those terrible fogs which so frequently envelop the British metropolis as with a pall. From the annual reports just furnished by the London gas companies it would appear that each foggy day in London represents to the gas companies ex¬ tra receipts to the extent of over $100,- 000. In view of this revelation peo- plo are now asking themselves in Eng- land whether the parliamentary op- positiou to legislation in favor of compelling all industrial concerns in the metropolis to use devices for con- sinning their own smoke does not originato with the gas companies, siuco London fogs are largely composed of the smoke from coal.—New York Trib- uno. NO. 23. A TYPICAL EGYPTIAN VILLAGE. Huts of Sun-Dried Mud, Without Ventila¬ tion and Full of Vermin. B. Talbot Kelly, the English art¬ ist, has written for the Century an article entitled “An Artist Among the Fellaheen.” Mr. Kelly says of a typical Egyptian village: Built entirely of sun-dried mud, the small, low huts, from considerations of economy nnd space, join one an¬ other whenever possible. Narrow and tortuous laues, left at haphazard, form the only thoroughfares, in which at first appears to be a huge mound of mud, surmounted by heaps of cotton and durra stalks, which serve the dual purpose of thateli and fuel. Many of these lanes are merely culs-de-sac, ending abruptly in a neighbor’s court yard, and forcing one to retrace bis steps and try again. Experience has taught me that the streets lead in the direction at first suggested; it is often safer to start the other way, nnd trust to the winding of the path to bring one out somewhere near the desired spot. As a rule, the villages have the ap¬ pearance of fortifications, the outside walls being frequently without doors or windows, and the lanes of the vil- lage terminating in massive wooden doors, which are usually closed at nightfall, and guarded on the inside by the village guffrali, or night watch- men. Each “house” has usually one door, opening into the lane, small and low; and the few windows, if provided at all, are merely slits in the mud w;*!l, innocent of glass or shutter, but or- nameuted with a lattice of split bam- boo, placed crosswise during building. Ventilation there is virtually none, the smoke of the fire of dung or corn cobs finding its egress by the door, and well nigh choking the inhabitants, which include not only the family,but chickens, turkeys, pigeons goats and whatever live stock the inhabitants ' possess. Every effort to exclude air seems to be made, the houses being too low to feel the breezes, and the streets too narrow to allow of any air circulation. The roofs, covered with piles of rub¬ bish for fuel, afford accommodation for a second installment of goats, pigeons, cats and especially dogs. One wonders how life can he supported in such conditions; yet the people are well conditioned and healthy, living' their lives in the fields and returning to their houses only to eat and sleep. Insect life naturally abounds, the Egyptian flea particularly being a prodigy of manly vigor and activity; but the Fellah lias a hide like a ga-^ moose (the Egyptian buffalo), and even travelers like myself eventually become impervious to its onslaught. Outside the village and almost at their very doors, the filth nnd ofi'nl of the place are deposited, resulting in the development of that plague peculiar to Egyptian life—“flies”—disgusting,but very necessary as scavengers, without which and the equally valuable rat these villages would quickly become uninhabitable. Shark Charmers. In the Persian gulf the divers have a curious way of opening the season. They depend implicitly upon the shark conjurers, and will not descend without their presence. To meet this difficulty the government is obliged to hire the charmers to divert the atten¬ tion of the sharks from the fleet, As the season approaches, vast numbers of natives gather along the shore and erect huts and tents and bazaars, At the opportune moment —usually at midnight, so as to reach the oyster banks at sunrise—the fleet, to the number of eighty or a hundred boats, pulls out to sea. Each of these boats carries two divers, a steersman and a shark charmer, and is manned by eight or ten rowers. Other conjurors remain on shore, twisting their bodies and mumbling incantations to divert tlie sharks. In case a man-eater is perverse enough to disregard t he charm and attack a diver an alarm is given and no other diver will descend on that day, The power of the con¬ jurer is believed to be hereditary, and the efficacy of his incantations to be wholly independent of his religious faith.—Lijipincott’s. Over 4000 Pieces in One Floor, The floor of the rotunda at the Lon- don Coal Exchange, where the mer- chants gather, is very unique. It is composed of inlaid woods, arranged in the form of » mariner’s compass, within a border of Greek fret. Up- ward of 4000 pieces of wood are em- ployed. Almostevery English variety is included in this scheme of decora¬ tion.