Below is the OCR text representation for this newspapers page.

AMERICAN HUMOR. rt Supplied by Our Exchanges. Classical anecdote: Said Cicero to Atti cus, “Shall you hang your stockings up to night at your father’s Lares?” Atticus pith ily replied: “No, I have hung up my sum mer toga at my uncle’s.” —Yale Record. He had just had his hair cut and return ed home. “Hum!” he says,after examining himself in the glass critically, “I guess I shall have to go back to the barber’s shop again This’ll never do!” “What’s the rnatter?” says his wife: “has he cut your hair too long?” “No, confound him; he’s gone and cut it too short. I’ll make him cut it over again.” At Hard Pan—Two gentlemen met on State street this morning. Said one to the other: “How is business?” “Poor,” was the reply “I met with a little accident. Night before last burglars broke into my store, but left without taking anything. Everything was marked so low that they came around next morning and made purchases. Albany Journal. The Mills of the Gods. “And what is the man whom you are to bless with your hand and heart, my dear ?” “Oh, his name is Arthur Mills.” “And how do you like him?” “Ob, he’s just the loveliest of men —a heaven-sent prize. He’s a trifle slow, though.” “Oh, well, never mind that. You know the mills of the gods grind slowly.” —Boston Times. “Hubby, did you mail my letter !” “Yes, my dear. Had to run like fury to catch the first mail.” “Why, here it is in your pock- V now.” “Hey? Um—a—yes, so it is— m, this isn’t your letter; this is—that s, t lis isn’t the one you wrote; this is thei one y u were going to write and forgot. Joi n Henry !” “No, Mary, I didn’t mail yoi r letter. “Well, I’m awfully glad. I want to add a postscript.”—Chicago News. O’Flinskin—Misther Macßell, ye’re a re spectable thradesman. I’m goin’ to thrate mesilf to a rale fish dinner, sorr, and I’ll give yes the ordher now. Macßell—lts mesilf ’ll be plazed to take it, sorr. O’Flinskin—Well, thin, will you be so kind as to send your gossoon of a boy round to me house with a red herr’n? —London Fun. “Oh, Mr. Savage, it is so kind of you to come up to criticise my poor little painting for the Art Monthly:” “Yaas. Which is this daub of your’v. mif’?” “There it is, on the wall sir.” “Ab, that will nevah uo. No art in it, m’ss. Very bad. Clio..ng simply shock *g. Pains me to look at it. And bless me ’ ” you haven’t even put some leaves on your trees when the whole landscape is cover I with snow. Nature net ah ” “Why, Mr. Savage, you are look ; ng out at the window. This is my painting—this little flower study behind you.” Home Items ami Topics. —“All your own fault. If you remain sick when you can Get hop bitters that never—Fail. —The weakest woman, smallest child and sickest invalid can use hop bitters with safety and great good. —Old men tottering around from Rheuma tism, kidney trouble or any weakness will be made almost new by using hop bitters. 4®*My wife and daughter were made healthy by the use of hop bitters, and I re commend them to my people.—Methodist Clergyman. Ask any good doctor if hop Bitters are not the best family medicine On earth ! 1! Malarial fever, Auge and Biliousness, will leave every neighborhood as soon as hop bit ters arrive. “My mother drove the paralysis and neu ralgia all out of her system with hop bit ters.”—. Ed. Oswego Sun. 33-Keep the kidneys healthy with hop bit ters and you need not fear sickness. —lce water is rendered harmless and more refreshing and reviving with hop bitters in each draught. —The vigor of youth for the aged and infirm in hop bitters 1! 1 (—“At the change of life nothing equals ) J Hop Bitters to allay all troubles incident > ( Thereto.” ) —“The best periodical for ladies to take monthly, and from which they will receive the greatest benefit is hop bitters.” —Mothers with sickly, fretful, nursing chil dren, will cure the children and benltit them selves by taking hop bitters daily. —Thousands die annually from some form of kidney disease t hat might have been pre vented by a timely use of hop bitters. —lndigestion, weak stomach, irregularities of the bowels cannot exist when hop bitters are used. A timely * * * use of hop Bitters will keep a whole family In robust health a year at a little cost. —To produce real, genuine sleep and child Pke repose all night, take a little hop bitters on retiring. JKy-None genuine without a bunch of green Hops on the white label. Shun all the vile, poisonous stuff with “Hop” or “Hops” in their name. BUSIN You will have nothing else if you tiy “St ralgbt Web” Cigarettes, just once. If you want a good fitting shirt, either white or fancy, try L. Fried. For the latest style and low prices in gents furnishing goods, L. Fried’s Is the pls 'e- Look for General Lee’s picture on each package of Farorlte Cigarettes. Favorite Cigarettes are mild, sweet and very fine. Overcoats, nobby and resonable in price, for children from 2% up, can be found In large variety at B. H. Levy & Bro.’s. Favorite Cigarettes wi’l sweeten meditar ton. Clean teeth, healthy gums and a pure breath by using Holmes’ Wash and Denti frice. Try a bottle. Retailers can get Favorite Cigarettes from Hy. Solomon & Co., wholesale agents. Linen cuffs 30 eats or three pair for 50 cents *t L, Fried’*. Favorite Cigarettes will sooth your troubles See below. Linen collars, latest styles, standing and t irn-down, reduced from 15 to 10 ce at L Fried’s. Wanted, 10,000 boys to smoke Favorite Ci garettes, at 5 cents per package. Look through the locals for cheap! dres 8 goods at L. Frieds. Connoiseurs smoke “Straight Web” Cigar ettes, and will have ho others, for they are choicest, For latest style fancy percale g Feecan and shirts L. Frlmi’s is the place. At L. Fried's, the reason you are not forced or talked half to death to buy goods you do not like,is because he carries a largeaud well selected stock. Also sells so cheap that you will find it no trouble to buy or get suited,as he intends to carry out as he advertises. For the accommodation of our patrons we have established a Tailoring Department, where any garment bought of us can be al tered to suit the taste of the most fastidious, free of charge. We invite the public to call and look through our establishment, which is by far the largest in the & THE SAVANNAH DAILY TIMES, THURSDAY, JANUARY 1, 1885. KROUSKOFF’S Wholesale and Retail MILLINERY HOUSE l ANNOUNCEMENT! WE ARE STILL CROWDED IN OUR UPPER AND LOWER FLOORS WITH AN IMMENSE STOCK OF Fine Fall aai ta Millinery I ; WHICH MUST BE CLOSED OUT BEFORE OUR IMPORTATION OF SPRING MILLINERY ARRIVES , IN THIS PORT. WE HAVE DECIDED ON A i Grand Clearing Out Sale I ' AND OFFER THE ENTIRE STOCK OF FELT, VELVET AND STRAW HATS, TRIMMED AND UNTRIMMED, FINE PLUMES, TIPS, FRENCH FLOWERS, VELVETS AND PLUSHES, SATINS, VELVET AND SILK RIBBONS, &c., At Cost and Less than Cost WE SHALL PUT ON SALE AND ESPECIALLY DRAW THE ATTEN TION OF THE PUBLIC TO OUR French Fur Felt Hats at 75 cents. “ “ Felts, Bound, SI.OO. Wool Felts at 40 cents. TRIMMED HATS AND BONNETS! ACT HALF I‘liK i; ! AND ALL OUR OTHER GOODS AT EQUALLY LOW PRICES. BEING LARGE JOBBERS IN THESE GOODS, IT IS NOT NECESSARY TO SAY THAT RETAILERS CANNOT POSSIBLY COMPETE, MORE ESPE CIALLY WHEN WE DECIDE ON CLOSING OUT. One Thousand Children’s Trimmed Feit Hats I AT 25 CENTS. THESE ARE LEFT OVER FROM LAST WINTER’S STOCK, BUT ARE ; PERFECTLY GOOD FOR STREET OR SCHOOL WEAR, AND ARE GOOD VALUE AT ONE DOLLAR. jS. Iv lt O L Wholesale and Retail Millinery. M. STERNBERG, JIIWEIER. When moving into my new Store I made very extensive purchases, and compliments have been showered upon me from all sides upon my Elegant and Tasty Stock. I presumed that my stock would have been ample for the Holiday Trade, but I was com- ■ pelled, owing to the appreciation I met with, to make continual additions to my stock, and yet my purchases could hardly keep apace with Tlie Unprecedented Demand ! I have now made arrangements so ample that I can assure my friends and the public that ■ after today my stock will be again as complete iu every respect as can only be found in the 1 very best houses in the leading Northern cities. MY SPECIALTIES ARE Diamonds, and the Most Celebrated and Reliable Makes of Gold Watches, and my Fancy Jewelry is not Wanting in Either Taste, Design or Workmanship. NO FANCY PRICES ! Every Article Guaranteed as Represented. i My unprecedented success is summed up in these few words. No matter how ignorant one may be as to the quality or value of Jewelry, he receives honest goods at honest prices. IVT. STEJFLKrBKZJFLCSr/ BROUGHTON ST. HOLIDAY GOODS o Finest Limoges China. o GIPSY SAUCERS AND PLATES. After Dinner Coffees, Tete a Tete Sets, Dinner Sets, Tea Sets, BREAKFAST SETS, DESERT SETS, AND Toilet Sets in Endless Variety I COLOGXE SEISI Fancy Glassware, I.einonade Sets, FINE HAMMERED BRASS LAMPS, W A. 3C D O LL. 0! And Thousands jof Other Fancy Articles at Store of JOHN A. DOUGLASS & CO. 161 Broughton Street, SAVANNAH, GA CARPETS & FURNITURE AT EMIL A. SCHWARZ. 3FLTTC3HS ’ JUT-A-TIB! Special Induce Hint to Buyers. Having replenished my extensive stock of CARPETS by the addition of the LATEST PATTERNS, I am prepared to offer SPECIAL BARGAINS iu that department. Goods at a Lower Figure than ever sold in Savannah. o RUGS AND MATS. A full assortment of Smyrna goods in Oriental and Persian designs and colorings at ower price than the common Tapestry and Velvet goods. COVERIIKTGrS, In Coverings we have the last shades of Silk, Flushed and Sateens. Also Cretons, Heps and Turkomams for Portiers. OIL CILOTHS. English and American sheet Oil Cloths and American goods from 1 to 2% yards wide. Antique Lace Curtains and Window Shades. Special designs, which must be seen to be appreciated. FURTVITUTAE. Having made special arrangements with some of the leading Furniture Manufacturing Companies, we are prepared to offer the finest assortment of FURNITTRE, at such a low figure that it will certainly be an i nducement for you to refurnish. We do uot publish price ■ as that only misleads. Call and look at the goods, and you will see that the facts are as stat ed EMIL A. SCHWARZ, Entrance 127 Broughton street, 1 door from Bull. FlßST ’class - STOCK A T LOW PRICES A T W, J. Lindsay’s Carpet and Furniture Emporium, 169 AND 171 BROUGHTON STREET. Lace Curtains from S.'i to Sls Per Pair and Tapestry Brussels Carpet at almost any Price. Ingrain and Hemp Carpets always on hand. Fringes, Felts, Canton Flannels, Raw Silks, Ramie and Jute Goods iu numberless designs. Window Shades by the Gross, the Neatest and Newest Patterns Always in Stock. Pole aud Adjustable Cornices, Symrna Rugs and Mats, Oil Cloths to suit the Rich aud Poor. «■»- A new lot of Imported CRELONNES with figures on them, just arrived. We mean business, and will sell LOW DOWN. Competent workmen. Satisfaction guaranteed. CALL EARLY, ON W. J. LINDSAY. everybody’wants to know why AL. FALK & SOIN, are selling their Clothing so cheap? Simply because they bought that Immense wholesale stock of Clothing of this season's manufacture, for Mk, Htjs, W d Mta’i fa in I. M, and in order to reduce same, they are giving their patrons and the public generally the benefit of low prices, guaranteeing all goods as represented, or R E F UM > I A T II E M O X E Y OX all unsatisfactory purchases—providing the goods are returned uninjured, within TEN DAYS after purchase. Their stock is still well assorted, and they would advise all who are in need of (not cheap clothing) but CLOTHING C’HC Al*. Give them a call before purchasing elsewhere. Remember the stand of TV. F'A. L. K. «fc SORT, THE ONE PRICE CLOTHIERS AND FURNISHERS, Successors to I. L. Falk & Co. Corner Congress, Whitaker and St. Julian Streets. HOLIDAY GOODS! AT A. J. MILLER & Co’s Furniture and Carpet Emporium Fino Farlcr Suits aud Beiricm Suits! Mirror Door Wardrobes, Combination Dressing Cases, Chiffoniers, Fine Dining Room Pieces. Also, choice assortment of NOVELTIES upholstered in Leather, Plush, Silk and Ramie. BOUQUET STANDS, BRACKETS, &c. OUR CARPET DEPARTMENT Is also filled with a choice assortment of goods suited to this purpose. CJEIILDKEIN’S DEPARTMENT. FINE DOLL CARRIAGES, BUREAUS, TABLES, CHAIRS, V ELOCIPEDES, &c., &c. <3“Do not fail to inspect our stock. J. MILLED Ac CO. HOLIDAY GOODS I WILL SELL MY GOODS AS LOW AS THE LOWEST, NOT EXCEPTING PEOPLE who offer to sell at COST. Come and see me and be CONVINCED. Bargains in Diamonds Gold and Silver Watches, Gold Jewelry, Huff ? 'kA? ’ Ladies’ Bar Pins, Ear Rings, Gold Pens and Pencils, Gold and Silver Headed Canes, Iklc . Gold Spectacles. ’ fl All at the lowest prices. ~ Gre‘it;inducements in Silver Platedwaro -“A T Al. L. DESBOUILLONS, No. 31 Bull Street. 3 PKOVISIONS AND GROCERIES. New Orleans Sugar! Ns?/ Orleans Syrup RECEIVED DIRECT B Y A. JI. & C. W. WEST. Yew Goods. DEHESA RAISINS, LONDON LAYER RAISINS, SULTANA RAISINS (Seedless), LOOSE MUSCATEL RAISINS, LEGHORN CITRON, NEW CURRANTS, DRIED FIGS, PLUM PUDDING, EVAPORATED PEACHES, EVAPORATED APPLES, TABLE AND COOKING PRUNES E. L. GEORGE’S, Cor. State and Whitaker streets. FIREWORKS ROMAN CANDLES, !SKY ROCKETS, VERTICLE WHEEL MINES, FLOWER POTS,' FIRE CRACKERS, CANNON CRACKERS -AT- BRANCH A COOPER'S. At A. HOYLE’S; Quinces for Preserving. Green Root Ginger. Hot fine Fulton Mark’t Bee Fresh Cabbages. No. 1 Ham at 15c. “ Strip Bacon at 13o» P. g’s Head at Gc. Pig’s Feet in half barrels Hebron Beauty Potatoes, The finest Table Potatoes in the wo 2 boxes string Garlic. V. DOYLE. Choice Family Groceries FOR THE HOLIDAYS FRESH NUTS, FRESH CRACKERS, IVative Wines. The Original Budweiser and An.causer Bot tle Beer. Fresh Candies, Wilson’s Crackers, Canned goods of every description. Goods delivered free in all parts of the city, Give me a call. V. S. STUDER, Corner of Drayton and Perry streets, ta to tars mi Hi THE TENNESSEE STOII KIMI w CONSIGNMENTS RECEIVED DAILY. Fruits and Vejyetatoiow ALWAYS ON HAND. Corner St. Julian street aud MarketSqu aro PRICES REASONABLE. r- GREEN GROCERY, O. W. TEIDD E JR PROPRIETOR, Corner Habersham and Chariton Sts. Always on Hand the Freshest and Choicest MEATS,POULTRY AND VEGETABLES FINE VEAL AND MUTTON, COUNTRY AND YARD EGGS FRUITS OF ALL KINDS IN SEASON. O-All orders promptly attended to, and Goods Delivered Free in all parts of the city | Your patronage respectfully solicited.*®* Christmas -AT- LaT’AIl’S. GENTLEMEN’S DRESSING GOWNS, GENTLEMEN’S SMOKING JACKETS, Handsome Patterns Silk Handkerch’fs FINE KID GLOVES, New Satin Scarfs and Ties, Fancy Walking Canes, Opera Glasses. LEATHER DRESSING CASES— English make, SHAVING SETS, Valises and Satchels ALL WOOL UNDERSHIRTS. CAMELS HAIR UNDERSUITS, BUGGY ROBES, WATERPROOF COATS- Englisli style, cloth on ouejado, 4S* Anything needed by gentlemen —A T LaF-AJR’ S, 23 Bull street.