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SUN DAI MORNING,
THE HAVEf'I OF CREAMS.
MABI K. BtTCK IS CHICAGO IXTEK-OCgAH.
When the weary day with its toil is o’er
Ana darkness broods over earth once
more,
We gladly slip tJjpeugh the gates of night,
And sail for a mystical shore.
Ir. the soft-winged shallop of sleep we glide
O era silent sea with a rhythmic tide.
That lulls to rest each throbbing woe
Our aching hearts may hide.
And though from afar no beacon gleams.
Nor mariner's star sheds its guiding beams
Yet ever the unseen ships go by.
Seeking the haven of dreams.
And when we’ve entered that haven fair.
The wonders untold that await us there!
Back meadows of childhood we
roam,*:.
Basking again in the lovelight of home.
The dear ones we’ve lost are with us once
more.
Just as we knew them and laved them of
ydre;
And none ever doubts all is not as it seems
” hile we linger entranced in the haven of
dreams.
S ° nijht meth t 0 mC t! ‘ at eott>t shad °"T
When death draws the curtain we'll slip
out of sight.
And sail in a shallop like that we call sleep
lo a wonderful land where no eyes ever
* jg
And the haven of dreams lieth white.
His Dream Wife
f T E—the ninu of this little inci
dent, that took place one af
ternoon this week in one of
<T the skyscraping office build
ings down town—was a young lawyer
of considerable practice and some in
herited wealth. She—the woman who
held the strong, shapely hand of the
man—was a manicure girl. The warm
rays of the sunshine that filtered
through the window glass in the young
woman's daintily furnished “manicure
parlor” seemed to smile kindly on the
pair. She was a pretty girl wit it nat
ural light colored hair and agate blue
eyes. There was an admiring gaze in
the young lawyer's eyes as he watched
her polishing his thumb nail. After a
few moments’ silence the girl ceased
work, looked up and inquired:
“How is your wife to-day . '
With a sudden start which indicated
that his thoughts had boeu wandering
the young man said:
“Ah; oh. yes—my wife, she is about
the same, you know.”
“I am glad.” responded the girl, “for
you said she was well when you were
here yesterday."
“Was it only yesterday that I was
here last'/” inquired the lawyer.
“It was, and you were here the day
before that and the day before, and in
fact every day for two weeks',” she
said with a smile.
He leaned back in his chair and
gazed into the attractive upturned face
of the girl and remarked: “It’s so
pleasant here, you know: just to rest
and chat with you —and —and have
you hold my hand.”
“Don’t say such things to me,” said
the girl as she brushed from her face a
stray straud of her golden hair. “Re
member your wife—she might not like
it.”
“That's true,” responded the young
fptlow, with a sigh, “but let us forget
her.”
“You must not,” sniil the girl, “for I
have always admired you for the way
you spoke of your wife. I hate men
who abuse their wives to other women.
I have always thought that no matter
how disagreeable a man's wife might
he nothing could justify him in gossip
ing about her faults.” *
“Do many men do that?” inquired
the young fellow. “I know they some
times tell their lawyers about their do
mestic troubles, but ”
“Oh. yes.” said the girl, “that's one of
the most disagreeable features about a
manicure girl’s life —at least. I find it
so men come to us with their
troubles. Men sit here by tbe hour and
tell me what disagreeable creatures
their wives are; it often seems to me
that no man loves liis wife. They all
seein to tell the same story -of a sud
den infatuation, a hasty marriage and
then disappointments and quarrels.”
“It's simply awful, is it not?” in
quired the interested listener.
“Yck, it is. There was a time when,
like every other frirl, I suppose. I
thought of marrying, but two years of
manicuring men’s finger nails lias
made me fearful of marriage. I could
not bear to think that my husband
would abuse me to other women.”
‘‘l don’t think that any man would
speak unkindly of you even though
you were his wife.” said the young
lawyer, as he looked full into the up
turned face of the girl.
She blushed, shook her head and
said: “That’s the way all men talk—so
I have been told—before marriage.”
“I am certain I never could were
you my wife," remarked tlie young
fellow with a tender tone of voice.
“Don’t you think you had better go
now,” said the girl. “Your wife will
expect you home 1o dinner."
“My wife will not be kept waiting—
she never dines with me. She—well—
she Is a most disagreeable person.”
“Don’t; please go,” pleaded the girl,
“you know you always iohl me before
how much you loved and admired your
wife, r loved to sit and listen to your
description of your happy home—your
domestic wife. I know you said site
was not pretty, but you told me she
was dainty and refined looking; that
she was so gentle and considerate; that
she did not care for society, except
when yon went with her. Oh, I know
she must be lovely: I wish I could sec
her and tell her bow nobly you have
talked about her. She is all that I
would try to be to a husband I loved.”
She suddenly ceased talking aud sat
with her hands clasped and her face
upturned. The young lowyer arose.
walked to the window and looked out.
After a.few minutes of silence he again
faced the girl and said:
“Yes, that’s all true. I did say those
things, but that was the story of a
dream wife, an ideal, not the reality.”
‘•Then you were lying all the time?”
gasped the girl.
“No, not that.” <vas the response. “I
was just painting my dream in words*
—you know that there is nothing so
happy as dreaming, and I have been
dreaming some years about a wife—the
kind I would like ”
"But," exclaimed the girl with a per
plexed expression on her flushed face,
“you have a wife."
“She's a nightmare.” retorted the
young fellow, “not a wife.”
“Please go,” urged the girl. “It's
cowardly to speak so of a woman and
that woman your wife. I am disap
pointed in yon—more than I can tell.”
"Ret me teil you of my nightmare
wife.” pleaded the young lawyer as he
stood directly in front of the chair in
which the girl was seated.
“I admit that I loved her very much,
that our courtship was happy, roman
tic and all that. She was an ideal wife
for a few weeks, then all changed. To
my faults she was always unkind. She
became cold and indifferent to my de
sires and fancies. She was cross and
fretful. She became careless in her
personal appearance except when she
expected friends. She quarrelled with
the servants, she neglected the
house ■”
"Don't tell me any more,” pleaded
the girl.
".Inst a little more.” urged the young
fellow. “When I sometimes—not of
ten—came home a little under the gen
tle influence of something stronger
than.water, my nightmare wife did not
wait until the next morning, when I
had recovered, to scold me, but talked
at me when I wanted sleep and began
again at breakfast.” -
“Was that so bad?” inquired the girl.
“That was the very worst of it: a
man with a bad head can’t stand a
scolding. A wife—a loving, gentle,
sensible wife—would wait until after
the head had resumed its normal shape
and then do her scolding.”
“I think you are right,” sai l the girl,
with a smile.
“Do you mean that?” inquired the
man.
"I do: I know you are right."
“I thought that I had not made a
mistake in you—l have been studying
you for many days and 1 am a good
judge of character.”
“I am awfully sorry you have such a
wife. I loved the wife you first told
me about. Why did you do that?”
“Because I wanted to draw you out
and study you. I pictured my dream
wife and now I have told you of my
nightmare wife.”
“Which is ti:e real one you have?"
eagerly inquired the manicure girl.
"Whether I have the dream wife 1
think depends on you.” said the young
lawyer, as he leaned over the girl’s
chair and gazed Into her face.
"I don't understand you,” retorted
the girl.
“I have neither a. dream wife nor a
nightmare wife, except in fancy, but I
want you to be my wife m.v ideal
wife." Silence reigned supreme for a
few seconds and with the glory of tiie
setting sun full on her pretty face the
girl softly said:
“I understand,- and I will try.”—New
York Sun.
Pure Sunlight ami All-.
Wo have often heard of “Sunny
Italy,” or the “clear light” of Egypt,
says the Desert, but, believe me, there
is no sunlight there compared with
that which falls upon the upper peaks \
of tiie Sierra .Madre or the uniuhabit- !
able wastes of the Colorado desert.
Cure sunlight requires for its existence
pure air. and the Old World has little
of it lift. When you are in Romo
again and stand upon that hill where
all good Romanists go at sunset, look
out and see how dense is the atmos
phere between you and St. Fetor's
dome. That same thick air is all over
Europe, all around the Mediterranean,
even over in Mesopotamia and by the
banks of the Ganges. It lias been
breathed and burned and battle smoked
for 10,000 years. Ride up and over the
high tablelands of Montana—one can
still ride there for days without seeing
a trace of humanity—anil how clear
and s' lhiess, how absolutely intangi
ble that sky blown, gunshot atmos
phere! You breathe it without feeling
it, you sec through it a hundred miles,
and the picture is not blurred by it.
Once more ride over the enchanted me
sas of Arizona at sunrise or sunset,
with the ragged mountains of Mexico
to the south of you. and the broken
spurs of the great Sierra round about
you. ; :% all the glory of tiie Old shall
be as nothing to Ihe gold and purple
and burning qrimson of this New
World.
The Sea Trout.
The gnmest of salt water fish, after
the striped bass, is the weak fish or sea
trout. The sport of angling for them
is generally enhanced because, feeding
as they generally do near the surface,
it is possible to fish for them with light
tackle. The best places to find them
in the vicinity of New York are Ja
maica Bay, the southwestern shore of
Staten Island and the mouth of the
Shrewsbury Kiver. While they have
been caught weighing upward of twen
ty pounds, a six or ten pounder is a
good size and the average will only
run from one to two and a half. There
is never any doubt when a weakfish
bites. He does not nibble around the
hook, but takes the bait at one fair
swoop and then starts off with it like a
limited express with time to make up.
He is a shy fish and the man who uses
a small liiie, light leaders and snells to
his hook, and keeps quiet while fishing
is the one who is apt to have the best
luck.—Country Life in America. 1
THE BRUNSWICK DAILY' NEWS.
HMIL
A Liberal Station For Cows.
If cows are fed a liberal ration of
palatable, nutritious ground feed night
and morning thov require no driving.
No dog or boy is necessary to chase
the fields over to persuade them, but
about milking time they are ready to
walk from the pasture to the barn quiet
ly. and paiis will be fuller, as there has
been no excitement. Keep cows quiet
and they give better returns. Tlius a
saving of labor and patience pays in
part for grain fed.
Horses Preferred For Cultivatin',;.
Slow horses are sometimes preferred
for cultivating, but a fast walking
borse dees much more work in a year
than the slower one. If a horse travels
twenty miles a day. and another twen
ty-five miles in the same time for every
working day in the year, the faster
horse will travel 1500 miles more than
the other. When working a largo field
a horse may travel from fifteen to
twenty miles a day. and a difference of
a mile or two, when several horses arc
in use, is quite an item in a week.
While attention has been given to the
breeding of fast irottors and runners,
there Is room for improvement in the
walking gait of horses.
Variation* 1 n Vegetables.
Freaks and variations in vegetables
have been numerous at experimental
stations. One of the beets planted for
seeds, instead of throwing up a seed
shoot, emitted branches from the root,
and these branches, coming from the
surface, threw out leaves, thus forming
a cluster of roots, which have grown
as annuals, showing no tendency fo
seeding. A potato plant developed tu
bers in abundance in the axils of its
leaves. An onion of the white Globe
variety sprouted into a top onion, tiie
cluster of small bulbs replacing the
top formation. Bi-annuals become au
nttals, for rows of sorghum and salsify
grown from seeds from plants which
were bl-annunls one furnished annual
plants the next year, thus showing how
easily and quickly the habits of some
plants can be changed by selection.
Strength of Farm Horses.
In trials made it was found that a
pair of more than ordinarily powerful
farm horses, one weighing 1250 pounds,
the other over 1400 pounds, at a “dead
pull" drew 1000 and 1025 pounds each.
This was when the band was so light
ened that the straightening of tin
traces gave the horses the benefit of
their own weight. With loose band,
allowing the traces to rise naturally,
each horse drew 300 pounds less.
These horses* were both well shod.
Another horse of about the same ap
parent strength as these, but unshod,
could only draw 075 pounds with a
tight band. In each case file horse
was hitched to the end of a rope about
150 feet long, having the benefit of the
stretching of the rope as a relief from
a “dead pull.” Tiie maximum strength
seemed to lie exerted at each trial, all
the horses being accustomed to heavy
pulling.
A Cheap Hal-n lloor 1.,'1l I'll.
The accompanying illustration shows
a convenient latch for a barn or gran
ary door on roller . The inside view,
a. shows liovv this may lie attached to
the door, b is the latch seen from the
outside, c is the block over which the
latch drops when the door is dosed. I
have used it on my farm buildings for
a number of years and find it exceed
ingly convenient and very cheap. It
cannot get out of order, and if it is bro
ken it can lx* easily and quickly re
placed.—U. .1. Shell, in New England
Homestead.
I.oßatinff Jn Apiary.
Where wild flowers and linden trees
are abundant is an'excellent place to
locate an apiary. On the farm such
•seeds as buckwheat and clover can be
sown and will yield a crop of honey-be
sides the usual crop they are intended
for. The bees will find any nectar pro
ducing plants within a radius of two
miles of the apiary, and sometimes
they will fly even further. Bees need
a great deal of water during spring and
summer, especially in March and April:
this is used to dilute the thick rich
honey which has been left over the
winter and make it suitable for the
young larvae, so a brook or stream
year by would bo desirable, although
not specially necessary. The hives
should Ik: placed southward, or east
ward: a wind-break on the north and
west is a great protection to the bees,
a hedge ol’ evergreens or a wall of
honeysuckles grown on an iron fence
is a quicker way, as one does not have
to wait too long for results. A hoard
fence will answer the purpose if one
does not care too much for looks.
Formerly tall trees near b.v were con
sidered an objectionable feature, for
sometimes the swarm would go out of
reach of the apiarist, but they are no
longer a detriment to the beekeeper,
for with the queen trap placed on the
hives at swarming time, the queen
is trapped and the sjvanr. will return
to the hive in less than a half hour, no
matter how high they may have clus
tered. If a board is laid on the ground
in front of the hives, it will prevent the
grass and weeds from growing up in
front of the entrances; an occasional
handful of salt will also be effective.
—P. G. Herman, in The Epitomlst.
The Question of Breed*.
There are certain characteristics that
constitute the good, the best, or the
ideal horse. It will be conceded by all
that the horse deficient in such charac
teristics is not the best or the ideal
horse, no matter what his breed is. If
there is one breed that may be depend
ed upon to yield more of such horses
than another then that breed would be
adjudged to be the best of the two.
But even that does not prove that one
should buy or breed to the horse only
because it is of that breed, for it might
he a poor individual, and he might get
a much better horse of the breed de
cided by the test named to be the infe
rior one. The discussion referred to
should he made along the line suggest
ed. and If it can be shown that one
breed is productive of more good
horses than the other, then to that ex
tent it will be proven to be the best
breed, and to that extent only.
Breeding is yet too far from an exact
science to be depended upon entirely
as an assurance of quality. Tiie ideal
individual with a good ancestry, and
possessed of the prepotency that gener
ations of line breeding imparts, is the
one that is tiie best, while the poor in
dividual. with the same kind of breed
ing is the worst imaginable. The truth
is that education and discussion should
Ive devoted to equipping horse breeders
to know a good Individual on sight,
and to know how to use it, in reproduce
lion.—Earns, Stock and Home.
The U*‘ of Limn on Soils.
Probably more general misunder
standing prevails regarding the use of
lime on soils than any other mineral
element which we apply. A good many
still seem to believe that lime is a ma
nure, and that its application takes the
place of nearly all other fertilizers. The
best way to dispel this error is to state
at the outset that lime is not a manure
or fertilizer, and where so used a se
rious mistake is made. Lime put on
poor soils is generally a waste of time
and good material. It never yet im
proved poor soil unless the land was
: otir or overfed with humus which it
could not well digest.
On rich soil, however, lime has an
important function to perform, and it
can be made to do it with great suc
cess. Lime is more like a disinfectant
than anything else. One should apply
it to the soil much as a man would take
some anti-bilious medicine. When the
soil is in danger of getting congested
and heavy with too much plant food a
dressing of lime might well be applied
to help it. Consequently, we find tiie
use of lime in connection with clover
excellent. Clover crops add a great
deal of material to the soil, and some
times there is so much in the* land that
lime is essential to help Its digestion.
Asa dressing on clover, lime pro
duces the best results, especially where
the clover has had a heavy stand for
two or more seasons. Land that is fed
heavily every year with barnyard or
green manure will lie helped by a
dressing of time. Sometimes the soil is
so rich, but congested with unassimi
lated food, that a dressing of lime for
one season without any fertilizer is the
Host thing for it. Because of success
ful work in this way some have appar
ently got the notion that lime is a good
fertilizer. But it is not, and would not
have* worked so well on any other soil
that was not rich in manure to begin
with.—S. W. Chambers, in American
Cultivator.
Ah llxcullcnt Corn Crib.
Corn, unless properly stored, is liable
to great damage by rats and mice,
while that: which remains may become
so mouldy even as to render it unfit for
use. A good corn crib, therefore, is of
the utmost value where this crop is
raised, and for the generality of locali
ties none are better than the one shown
in the accompanying illustration. Not
only will the corn stored in it lie abso
lutely safe from the depredations of all
rodents, but it is sure to keep in splen
did condition.
The in-sloping sides will prevent the
rain from getting at the corn, albeit
the sides are of open sin t work to let the
air pass through. It can be construct
ed any size desired, though it is down
to not over five feet wide at the floor.
Doors can also be placed under the
eaves, and the corn turned in through
them direct lrnin tin* wagon, in which
case a chute is needed to pour the corn
into and two men to do tin* work of till-'
ing, one standing on a step ladder at
the required height to empty the bas
kets easily into the chute, and the other
down in the wagon to pass them up to
him full of corn.
Generally, however, the corn can best
be carried in by the basketful through
the door at the end of tiie building, and
dumped where wanted. The crib, un
less very large, should*always be filled
solidly from the rear to the door; if un
usually wide, there may be a walk
through the centre, with cribs on cither
side. The posts, it will be observed,
have broad strips of tin tacked about
them. These stop rars and mice from
getting up to the corn. If possible, the
structure should be built at a consider
able distance from all other buildings,
and no fences or the like on which
mice can find a foothold should run
anywhere near it.—Frederick O. Sibley,
in New York Tribune Farmer,
ENOUCH TO SCARE THE MERMAIDS.
A Bearded, Urvn-Faced Mojister of the
Sea Seen by Truthful Angler*.
■T. B. Tnomer lias just returned
Athens, Ga.. from a trip to the South
Carolina coast, and has many interest
ing incidents to relate. Among others
was one concerning the discovery of a
queer sea devil near MeCellanville,
S. C.
Mr. Toomcr. in company with George
I!. Oongdon and Dr .1. E. Taylor, of
Georgetown, S. C., made a fishing trip
to Sandy Point, a long, sandy reef on
Hull's Bay. opposite Cape Romain and
Bull's Island lighthouse, just in front
of tiie village of McClellanville. They
were quite intent upon their angling
when they noticed rapidly coming in
from the ocean a strange looking mon
ster. They ceased fishing at once and
gazed intently upon the queer creature
of tiie deep that had evidently conte up
from its deep sea home.
As tiie monster approached its out
lines became more apparent to the eyes
of the astounded fishermen. It had a
gruesome, uncanny look about it. it
gradually assumed the shape of a giant
corpse. The size was far beyond that
of any man living. The body was on
its back, the ghastly face upturned to
the skies. When within about 120 feet
of the shore this sea monster got into
water that was running like a race, and
the whole body leaped out of the Water
and was fully exposed to die aston
ished gaze of the three fishermen. Its
head was much larger than that of a
man and was covered witli long, black
hair. From the point of view of the
spectators no arms were visible. The
lower extremities of the body were blit
dimly visible and their outlines could
not be determined.
This queer creature floated about for
two or three minutes, then made a sad
den reverse movement and started out
to sea against tiie tide. In doing this
it raised its head far shove the water
and faced the three gentlemen who laid
been so intently watching it. A flow
ing black heard fell several inches lie
low its face, and as a small boat with
a negro in it approached it gave a
savage look that betokened danger to
the occupant of the boat should he ap
proach any nearer.
Then the monster sank beneath the
water and rose again nearer the shore.
It came up out of the water perpendic
ularly, exposing about two feet of its
body, and as it did so, Congdon fired at
it: with liis Winchester. It again disap
peared to rise again about every five
minutes. Over ten shots were fired at
it. but none took effect. The shadows
of tiie night fell and tiie attempt to kill
or capture this wonderful curiosity of
the deep sea had to lie abandoned.
Just then a fearful storm broke over
the bay, anil the fishing party had to
seek shelter under their boat, which
they turned upside down on the bench.
- Mr. Toomcr declares that it was such
a sight as the oldest inhabitants of tiie
coast section had never seen. AH three
of the gentlemen in the fishing party
were reared near McClellanville, and
they say they never saw such a creat
ure before in their lives. People along
t In* coast will keep a close watch, and
if it returns again they will make a
strong effort to capture it.—Atlanta
Constitution.
American Concho* In South Afrien.
The conches used in South Africa are
built in the United States—at Concord.
Most of them hold twelve people inside
in rows of three, six people facing and
six back to tin* mules. By experience
we learned that the two corner seats
back to the mules are most agreable.
Luggage on these journeys is a consid
eration, as it is charged for at the rate
of a shilling a pound, but each pas
senger may take a rug—or “blanket,”
as they are always called—anil a
small basket of food. Tiie great ob
ject is to get ns much food as possible
into a small space, for when we trav
eled we could only be sure of two
meals—one breakfast and one dinner—
during the three days and nights of
continuous t raveling.
We made inquiries about the outside
places, thinking they might be prefer
able, lint some follow passengers, who
were old hands at such traveling, ex
plained that when the coach upset the
outside passengers were those to suf
fer; tiie insides come off, as a rule,
with a few bruises, the others getting
the broken arms and the like, and this
outbalanced our desire for the open
air. Not that one suffered from want
of air, for the conch has no windows at
all; glass would not stand Die jolting
for an hour. There is a tarpaulin that
one may unroll and pull down over tin*
windows when tin* rain comes in intol
erably. The sun one must bear, for if
the tarpaulin is down it is too insuffer
ably hot. J. W. Davies, in Lippin
cot t's.
Tattooing Instead of Branding;.
Owners of pure bred registered ani
mals are often bothered by the ques
tion of how best to mark them, to dis
tinguish them in case they stray, and
to establish their identity under any
circumstances. The central experi
ment farm at Ottawa, Out., suggests
tattooing in place of the more usual
branding. The branding iron not only
frequently leaves an unsightly and dis
figuring scar, but fails to serve every
purpose, since it indicates the owner
rather than partiularly identifies the
animal. The tag and button devices
commonly used in the car are usually
a source of annoyance, due to the apti
tude they display for attaching them
selves to everything they may lie
brushed against. Various live stock
associations have devised at one time
and another more or.less ingenious,
and less or more satisfactory devices
to insure identification, but nearly all
are open to the objection that they
fall in a short time to serve the end in
view.—Springfield Republican.
Most men have as much faith in air
ships as they have in air castles.
NOVEMBER 9
THE LADY GIRAFFE.
l’he lady giraffe for the ballroom was
dressed
Iu tiie latest decollete style.
When a dashing young beau,
The good-looking dodo,
Stepped lip to her side with a smile.
"My dear Miss Giraffe,” said he, with a
liew.
“You're the fuirbst of maids at the ball;
And yet, if your neck
Should grow longer a speck
You would need to wear nothing at all.”
—Fuck.
_ Ji iroles ak
“Their wealth must lie prodigious.”
“It is. They own two automobiles.”-*
Detroit Free Press.
Me studies his geography
And thinks lie has it tine.
When someone tilings the soldiers out
And moves tiie boundary line.
—Washington Star.
•Sim (after accepting him)—“Have you
ever loved any other girl?” He—“ Sure!
I can bring you half a dozen written
testimonials if necessary.” Chicago
News.
“I hope there will he no mistake in
administering these medicines.” “Have
no fear, doctor lam a professional
nurse, and madam is a professional in
valid.”—New York Weekly.
Stranger-" How did this out-of-the
way place ever get the reputation of
being a health resort?” Native—“ Why,
tn.v dear sir, at least three prominent
men have died here.”—Chicago News.
’i here was once a villainous tough,
W ho receives a surprising rebuff'
When In trying to jolly
A chappie named Clioily,
lie was handled exceedingly rough,
- Philadelphia Record.
Mrs. Dimpleton—“Why don’t you get
■Vour life insured?” Dimpleton—
"What's the use? I’m well enough,
and I'll probably outlive you.” “Well,
you always did look on the dark side.”
—Life.
Stockson—“Are the officers of your
new oil company prudent and far-see
ing men?” Ttckertape “Are they?
Why, they only own three shares each,
and we had to pay ’em to fake them.”—
Puck.
Captain Smythe fa good soldier, but
no society man, to the hostess) —“I
have to thank you, Mrs. Brown, for an
evening which lias been—er—after two
years on the veld, most enjoyable.”—
Punch.
Mamma -“Johnny, I told you to go
and wash your face and hands. When
I tell you to do a thing, I expect you to
do it.” Johnny—“ You're not much of
a judge of human nature, are you,
mamma ?”—Boston Transcript.
Barnes—“ There goes Hiller in his au
tomobile. How quickly he has learned
to run the thing.” Sbedd—“Yes; I sup
pose it is a faculty that is inherited.
His father used to be quite an expert
at tiie wheelbarrow.” Boston Trans
cript.
“I wonder if advertising like this.”
said the unsophisticated youth, after
looking over the department store an
nouncement, “is really expensive?”
“Wait till you get a wife who reads
those ads and you’ll find out,” replied
I’hamliman. -Philadelphia Press.
“Well,” said tiie lady who was en
deavoring to give the widow consola
tion on the way home from the ceme
tery, “Hie worst is over now.” “I’m
afraid not,” answered the afflicted one.
“The lawyer says there’s a bad flaw in
one of the insurance policies.”—Chica
go Record-Herald.
The liuyer of Ileef.
The buyer occupies a position of con
sequence in the stock yards com
munity. He is an expert, usually a
man of middle age. who has obtained
his education anil technical ability
partly in tin* packing houses and part
ly on the ranch. An experienced buyer
is likely to receive a salary of .SIOOO to
SSOOO a year, and he is worth all of
that, for on his ability to tell, by a
moment’s inspection, what quality of
beef will lie produced by a steer thet
lie never before laid eyes on depends
primarily the excellence of the product
issued by his house, and hence the in
crease of its business.
The buyer's work is not arduous, and
to all appearance his task Is a simple
one. Ho walks along the fiat board
laid along the top of the fence, glanc
ing keenly at the cattle in the different
pens. Some lie passes by without a
pause, others he stops to inspect more
closely and occasionally lie displays
his interest in a group by asking a
question or two of the man in charge.
Long experience enables him at a
glance to distinguish between a grass
fed steer ami a corn-fed steer, to de
cide whether an animal is entitled to
be classed as “fancy," “good” or “com
mon,” anil to guess within a few
pounds of an animal’s exact weight by
glancing at . him. The buyer makes
his purchases “on the hoof,” paying
tiie market price ruling for the day
for the grade in which it is decided
each group of cattle belongs. In a few
words the transaction is completed and
tiie buyer's interest in the affair is
ended.—Leslie's Monthly.
IS 100,090,000 of Beef.
The total annual export value of
United States meat—of which beef
forms the principal item—is in round
figures $100,000,000. If we add to this
the distributive sales of tin* various
packing establishments in the United
States for the domestic market as well,
we line! that it reaches the enormous
total of 1,000,000 carloads, valued at
$2,000,000,000. Added to this is the
value of the many by-products of the
packing house, which amount to many
millions more.—Leslie’s Monthly,