Newspaper Page Text
4
tax him about SIOO for every minute he staid in the
office.
It may be that Hoke Smith has full knowledge of
the unpleasant side of the man’s nature and has
already reached the conclusion that he is a very
good fellow to give advice, but that the advice must,
not be taken. Roosevelt recently called him to a
conference simply to please him. just as Hoke ap
pealed to his Ego in 1906 and got a battered, tat
tered and torn reninent of populist votes for his
trouble. Where this trouble is to end no one can
say, as no one knows just how long Tom Watson yet
has to live. It is pretty certain that the P. M. of his
life, like the A. M. of it. will be devoted to cussing
out and fighting to the last ditch all the best that
there is in statesmanship and good government. He
is. in our opinion, as serious a menace to well-regu
lated and orderly society as the rankest of socialists,
and were we in favor of banishment of citizens,
would unhesitatingly endorse any proposition look
ing to such disposition of him. The better remedy,
however, is publicity. Give the people the light, and
then it will be up to Mr. Watson to show on the an
vil reason just why his theories, not principles,
should prevail.
Both Sides of the Georgia Campaign as Reported by
Strictly Impartial Country Correspondents.
By Evad Reyd.
(Special to Joe Brown Newspaper.)
Suwanee, Ga., May 16.—Gwinnett county is now
unanimously for Brown. There were never any out
and out Smith supporters, but one citizen was
undecided until yesterday, when he came over in
a gallop.
The reason for this citizen’s precipitancy was
the action of his favorite hen. Day before yesterday
this hen laid an egg bearing on the shell a base
relief of a strong and classically beautiful masculine
head and face. T'he features were identified by
scores of citizens as those of our nonpareil stand
ard bearer, the Hon. Joseph M. Brown. The hen’s
owner, however was not wholly convinced until yes
terday when, as if in rebuke of him of little faith,
the aforesaid fowl produced a second egg with the
initials “J. M. B.” clearly embossed around the mid
dle. The owner could no longer doubt that the Lord
is on the Brown side and he wisely accepted this
dual manifestation of His position as an admonition
that Mr. Brown’s election be made unanimous.
Great enthusiasm prevails, and Mr. Blank's hen
is the heroine of the occasion.
Long live Brown! Down with Smith!
THE REASON
(Special to Hoke Smith Newspaper.)
Suwanee, Ga.. May 16. —Your correspondent will
be unable to report further progress in the cam
paign for the re-election of our noble Governor, the
Hon. Hoke Smith, for the simple reason that his
cause has already progressed to the maximum limit.
We were humiliated last week because honesty and
truthfulness compelled us to acknowledge the pres
ence of one Joe Brown thistle in the Hoke Smith
rose garden of Gwinnett county. But now this
fungus has been removed, and Gwinnett county
proudly proclaims to the rest of Georgia that she
is unanimously for lion. Hoke Smith.
The last convert to our righteous cause had not
been exactly an opponent, but was unable to com
pletely make un his mind. The circumstances of his
regeneration are interesting. Mr. Blank is his name
and he raises many chickens. Day before yester
day one of Mr. Blank's hens laid a malformed egg,
bearing on one side a sort of medallion of what
remotely resembled a human face. A scientific man
visiting hereabouts pronounced it a picture of the
head of a Pithecanthropus Erectus, which he ex
plained was a creature not exactly human and not
wholly animal, but now entirely extinct. Some
neighbors suggested that it was the likeness of Joe
Brown. Mr. Blank said this was nonsense and asked
who it could be proved by, as no one had ever seen
Joe Brown. Late that afternoon a drummer came
to the village who was willing to make affidavit that
he had once seen Joe Brown at his office window,
and that the egg-shell features were unquestionably
his.
Mr. Blank then and there proclaimed that he
would be no party to shell-game politics, and de
clared emphatically his endorsement of our peerless
Governor’s candidacy. There was great rejoicing
over the return of the solitary sinner in our midst,
which was increased to tumultous proportions on the
following day when the same hen laid an egg on
which was inscribed the letters “J. M. 8.,” which
all. of one accord, interpreted to mean “Just Massa
cre Brown.” And we will.
No more bulletins from Gwinnett county until we
send in on the night of June 4 the report of her
unanimous vote for the lion. Hoke Smith.
\ ive la belle Hoke Smith! Abas le Brown ter
rible !
Has Mr. Gray Failed?
The many friends of Hon. James R. Gray deep
ly sympathize with him m the financial embarass
ment that has befell The Journal through the fail
ure of Inman & Co. of Augusta. The stock of the
Journal corporation was held by the creditors of
Inman & Co. as collateral for advances made, and
with its failure Mr. Gray, it is stated, is left penni-