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ABSURD ADVERTISEMENTS. the eternal unmerciful vengeance of God, and the people think that these teachers must be remarkably kind to use such con stant endeavors to deliver them from the hands of such an enemy as God is! Be ing deceived they cannot reason. If they could reflect, and calmly reason on the subject, they would see at once that if these teachers were in reality so much better than God, as their preaching repre sents, God would not have sent them. If God were an enemy to His creatures, in room of sending such loving creatures as these foxes pretend to be, He would send His messengers of vengeance and cut them off at once. When the deceit has succeeded, and the people believe in the false doctrines which are inculcated, have they any peace? Have they any rest? Do they enjoy quietude? No, they have no peace, no rest, day nor night. What is the matter? The fact is, the creed in which they are taught to believe is full of cruelty, and teaches them that they are every moment in danger of worse conse quences than can be represented by any similitude in nature. We are informed that the fox will cun ningly feign himself to be dead, will stretch himself out in a lifeless posture, by which deceit he induces the fowls to light on or near him, when in a sudden and nimble manner lie snatches and de vours them. So false teachers cunningly feign themselves to be dead to the world, to have no desire for earthly riches, honor or power, by which deceit the)’ draw the people.into their very jaws, and between their sharp cutting teeth. Of all classes of the community none have a greater thirst for riches, honor and power than these false teachers. They are continually laying plans and contriving schemes to get power into their hands, and at the same time pretend to be dead to the world. This is acting the fox faithfully. in delineating, illustrating and defend ing their creeds, false teachers resemble the cunning of the fox of the wilderness in several respects'. Where this artful animal burrows in the ground, he takes care to have several outlets, so that if he be attacked at one of them, while his adversary is looking out for him at that place, he makes bis escape at another, and is gone long before his adversary knows it. Thus do false teach ers ; they endeavor to hide themselves in as great obscurity as possible, but if in quiry and argument pursue and find them out, they have taken care that they have more ways than one for an escape. If they were attacked on the principle of the works of the creature as matter of justifi cation to eternal life, and if the argument is likely to bring them out to the light, they make their escape through the well- studied avenue of partial sovereign grace and particular election. If, on the other hand,they are questioned in a skillful man ner on the doctrine of partial election, and what they call sovereign grace, and if they find no way to defend this scheme, all at once tlley tack short about and are pleading in a most tender and affectionate manner for the free offers of salvation to all, and laying it down in the most solemn manner, that all are invited to come in welcome to the gospel feast. Thus the fox is gone. [Concluded in our next.] 4 « » » » —A man may learn infidelity from books and men, but never from nature. “I would like this advertisement trans lated into French/ said an American in Paris, handing to a clerk in the American Register office the following curious ad vertisement Twenty francs reward will be paid for the recovery of a cameo brooch which represents Venus and Adonis lost on the Boulevard des Italiens about ten o’clock last evening.” But the literary productions of advertisers who have axes to grind, and who pay liberally for the privilege of occupying space, have before now proved very interesing bits of read ing in the columnsofa well edited paper. H. H. Brown A Co. of no 1 Center street kept standing tor several days in a leading New York Daily, “Soldiers who have lost their discharges, and who did not receive pensions from the date of-their discharge or' death, please apply.” In the “wants” department of a country ex change a resident advertises for a woman to wash, iron and milk one or two cows a wine merchant asks for bids for “ sixty dozen of prime port, lately the property of a gentleman forty years of age, full in body, and with a high boquet.” A livery stable offers cheap a mail phaeton, the property of a gentleman with a movable head as good as new,” and “a splendid grey horse, calculated for a charger, or would carry a lady with a switch tail and warranted kind.” It is easier for some people to determine what they want than to aks for it. Words arfebugbears to them and language takes terrible shapes. “To be sold—an erard piano, the property of a lady about to travel in a walnut case with carved legs,” was humorously com mented upon by the Saturday Review a few months ago. The Irish World copies an item, “ Purse lost by a poor widow woman who has a sick child containing 13s and a letter.” No wonder the child was unwell. The next item in the col umn is the World’s own, and is as follows: Robert Taylor, eighty-eight years is the father of twenty-five children by three -wives seventeen of whom are living.” Robert should be tried for bigamy. The Chicago Tribune not long since copied the advertisement of a widow 7 who inten ded to succeed her hvsband in the man agement of a hotel: “The hotel will be kept by the widow of the former land lord, Mr. Brown, who died last summer on a new and improved plan. She will be aided by other stockholders.” Such a corporation would not deserve to have a soul. A coroner’s verdict reads thus: “The deceaed came to his death by ex cessive drinking, producing apoplexy in the minds of the jury.” A country paper says, “ A child was run over by a wagon three years old, and, cross-eyed with pan- tlets on.” —Cunning signifies especially a habit or gif 7 of overreaching accompanied with enjoyment and a sense of superiority. It is associated with a small and dull conceit and with an absolute want of sympathy and affeefion. It is the inten- sest rendering of vulgarity, abso.ute ut ter.—Iiuskin. THE CONCEITED BOY. Lawrenee Green was a .very proud and conceited boy. and his uncle TlTomas thought it woura be well on that account to humble him a little !So one day he spoke to him, and asked him to take a- walk. Before they had walked an hour, they saw a bird, u fish, a squirrel, a rab bit, a spider,, and a goose “ Can you fly like a bird ?” asked Un cle Thomas. “No,” replied Lawrence. “Can you swim like a fish?” “No, tlncle.” “Can you climb a tree like a squirrel ?” “ No, I cannot.” “Can you run lfke a rabbit? ’ “No, Uncle, you know I cannot.” “ Well, then, can you spin like a spi der ?” “ I cannot,” said Lawrence, not a little mortified that he had to say no to so many questions. “ What can you do then ?” inquired liis uncle, “ can you hiss like a goose ? “ Yes, I can,” quickly replied the boy, his face kirdling with smiles as he an swered. “ Then,” replied his uncle, “ if you can neither fly like a bird, swim like a fish, climb like a squirrel, run like a rabbit, nor spin like a spider, and do nothing better than hiss like a goose, I would advise you to be more humble hereafter ; for it appears that the bird, the fish, the squirrel, the rabbit and the spider, are in some things much more talented than you are.” Lawrence Green profited by the les sons of that walk, and was not so con ceited afterwards. ADVICE TO YOUNG MEN. Never use a lady’s name in an improp er place, or at an impioper time, or in mixed company.- Never make assertions about her that you think are untrue, al lusions that you ft el she herself would blush to hear. When you meet with men who do not scruple to make use of woman’s name in a reckless aud unprin cipled manner shun them, for they are the verv worst members of the commun ity—men lost to every sense of honor, every feeling of humanity. M any a good' and w( rthy woman’s character has been forever ruined and her heart broken by a lie, concocted by some villain, and re peated where it should not have been, and inffhe presence of those whose judg ment could not deter them from circula ting the foul report. A slander is soon propagated, and the smallest thing de rogatory to a woman’s character will lly on the wings of the wind and magnify as it circulates, until its monstrous weight. crushes the poor unconscious victim. Respect the women, for your mother and sisters are women, and as you would have their fair name untar nished and their life unembittered by the slanderer’s biting tongue, heed the ill that your own words may bring upon the mother, the sister, or the wife of some fellow-man.