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PACE 2B THE BANKS COUNTY NEWS WEDNESDAY, JULY 9, 2008 Outdoors With Skipper Great to see the future enjoy fishing I t all began with a phone call from my seven-year- old grandson Hunter. In an excited voice, he said, “Grandpa, I caught 15 bream today!” “That’s great, I replied!” In the background I heard the voice of little Morgan, age four, “Tell him, I caught two!” I love to hear of children fish ing, as it gets them outdoors to enjoy the beauty of God’s cre ation. My son later told me that Hunter had caught them all by himself. He put the worm on, threw out the cork, reeled them in and took the fish off the hook. I was certainly proud of him. They had gone to a friend’s four- acre pond to fish over skipper the July 4th holiday. The pond had the usual assortment of fish, bream, catfish, bass, crappie, but seems no one had ever caught a fish of PRIZE CATCH Ethan Stokes, 10, recently reeled in this six-pound bass, an accomplishment the young fisherman was quite proud of. any size. Well, that changed later on in the same day that my grandson had called. Ethan, 10-year-old son of Kip and Amanda Stokes, who live on the pond in Dacula, was fishing the pond. He had taken his Zebco outfit he used for catfishing, put a live bream on it along with a bobber, and cast it out. A bit later, he noticed his cork went down, then popped up, then it began moving, dragging the float. It stopped for a while, and the cork was at the surface. Ethan began reeling, and then felt something big on the end of his line. There was a fish on. This was to be the biggest fish caught out of the pond. After a battle, Ethan brought the fish to shore. It turned out to be around a six pound bass. With the neighbors from around the pond coming to take a look, and giving Ethan high fives, he was one proud fellow. His mother told me he loves to go fishing and that you will find him almost every other day down at the lake giving it a try. A young fisherman in the mak ing. I think that keeps a lot of youngsters out of future trouble, when they enjoy fishing and/or hunting. That bass is going up on the wall in Ethan’s bedroomas soon as it gets back from the taxider mist. Congratulations, Ethan. I am looking for a 10 pounder next. If you have an outdoors story do give me a call. Skipper Smith is an outdoors columnist for The Banks County News. His column appears weekly. Let him know about your hun ting or fishing adventure at 706-677-1520. Diamond Talk Items which may turn your stomach I’m very proud to have been a baseball fan for 87.5 percent of my life. It has opened my eyes to a massive amount of philosophi cal insight (a la Pee Wee Reese, Casey Stengel, Yogi Berra and Harry Caray) and overall made me, in no humility whatsoever, a smarter person. There is, however, one thing that has been bother ing me about the game for years. Why is baseball the only sports venue in which gross behavior, manifested in vulgar habits dis played on the field and in the dugout, is not only accepted, but expected? These things I speak of are a bit touchy to discuss in good society: spitting, slobbering, and adjusting one’s, ahem, private parts. (Or, as I like to refer to them, ssa.) Spitting is an important part of the game, nearly as important as the game itself. We are able to see a myriad of amateur, advanced and expert spitters among the rosters of all teams. Watch a game on the tele vision and you will catch spittle being ejected with practically every camera view. That so much liquid is being lost from the body through spittle makes it amazing that we don’t see more dehydra tion in the big leagues. I have watched for years the great spitters in the game, and by a wide margin, Boston Manager Terry Francona is baseball’s pre mier spitter. Tito, as he is called by those who like him, is a baby boomer, which may explain why he is such an accomplished spit ter. Born in 1959, Terry is a second- generation major leaguer; his father Tito Francona played major league bah for years (1967-69 for the Atlanta Braves) and no doubt taught Terry how to get the best out of every drop of moisture in his mouth. I recently watched a BoSox game and was abso lutely mes merized by the spitting exhibition Terry put on. Spit was flowing like the Mississippi River at flood stage. Terry makes Old Faithful look like a dripping faucet - a magnifi cent work of art. Many years ago I worked on the railroad and crewed with a wonderful fellow named Harry Bortmas. Harry was a conductor, and older gent, that we ah loved. Harry also chewed tobacco. Harry’s affectionate nickname was “slobber lip” due to the con tinuous drip of brown juice that came slobbering out of the comer of his mouth. Baseball has many slobber-lips. It has, however, improved from years past. At least now the players are able to change out of their stained shirts between innings. Chipper is a great slobberer. His method is to work up a good load of spit, tilt his head forward, hori zontal with the ground, and then, through his patented release meth od, slowly let the goop fall from his mouth over a period of 30-40 seconds. The sight of this nearly made me physically ill once. Men have a tough time keep ing ah of their private parts in the right place during the game. Those private parts protected by a “cup” are exceptionally dif ficult to manage. The cup itself is uncomfortable and unyielding, and the private parts lying beneath the protective cup are next to impossible to shift once the cup is in place. Hence, one can see ballplayers continually attempt ing to get their private parts in a comfortable position throughout the game. Someone really needs to talk to Mark Teixeira about this. Every time the camera focuses in on Tex, one can see him trying to arrange his cup and that which lies under. It is becoming rather embar rassing for us men to continually explain to our spouses just why a guy has to do this seemingly ah the time. Baseball is the only sport I know that has allowed this behav ior to continue and blossom. One does not see football players slobbering ah over their jerseys. Basketball players do not spit on the court. I have yet to see a PGA pro adjust his private parts. I’ve not seen NASCAR drivers emerge from their car in the winner’s cir cle spitting, slobbering or adjust ing their private parts (ssa). The purpose of this article and the delicate subject within was twofold: first, to acknowledge to women that we men realize that it ah does look quite horrid, and, secondly, to simply explain why ballplayers have to ssa. Spitting is manly, slobbering is both Neanderthal and studly, and adjusting the private parts, well, that’s simply a man-thing. Yes sir. A smarter person. Banks County resident John Rieken is an avid baseball fan. E-mail comments about this col umn to jrieken@windstream.net. PREPARED The Commission Chairman must be prepared to manage the county: Departments Road Department: maintain all county roads, bridges and rights-of-way Public Utilities: Fresh and waste water treatment and distribution Planning & Zoning: Property development and regulation Fire & EMS: Protection for property and people E911: Dispatching help for all emergency calls Personnel: Overseeing employee benefits and procedures Finance: Developing and managing the county budget and expenditures Functions Public Relations: Spokesperson for the county. Relationships with Constitutional Offices: Working together for the best interests of the county. Leadership: Setting goals and direction for the Board of Commissioners Accessibility: Open Door Policy Involvement: Board member of various community outreach programs. Keep the Continuity of Banks County Government Vote for GENE HART I would appreciate your vote and the opportunity to continue progress in Banks County serving as your Chairman of the Banks County Board of Commissioners. Questions/Concerns? Contact Information: 706-340-0825 (C) or gene@bcrp.org Paid for by the Committee to Re-Elect Gene Hart BOOK YOUR SUMMER PARTIES NOIV! Offering Birthday Parties, Corporate Events, Family Reunions, Church Group Events and More! 1 FREE ROUND OF MINI 60LF Limit 1 per person. Expires 7/31/08. No cash value and no substitution. Lr^ippin^a r Available!, Closed-in shoes required for go-karts. Socks required in inflatables. 706-335-3866 40155 Hwy. 441, Commerce, GA 30529 Located at Interstate 85 at exit 149 just past the Wal-Mart www.funopolisfamilyfuncenter.com Hours: Mon.-Thurs. 11 a.m. - 10 p.m., Fri.-Sat. 11 a.m. - 11 p.m., Sun. 12 p.m. - 9 p.m. Where the Fun Begins and Never Ends!! Now Open f • Laser Tag Arcade Games * Inflatables Spider Zone