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Jimmy Carter To Face Demands
by Mar ben Bland
To the Chinese, 1979 may be
the year of the Sheep, however,
to Jimmy Carter, 1979 so far. has
been the year of the headache.
Only two months into 1979
the President faces headaches
at home and abroad which
would take the combined effort
of B.C., Stanback and Goodies
to provide some relief.
Around the world Mr. Carter
faces headaches in Iran where
the U.S.-backed Shad Moham
med Reza Pahlave has been
deposed by the Ayatollah
Khomeini. Where the U.S.
embassy and Americans them
selves themselves have been
under attack and where the oil
tap which supplies about 5% of
America’s energy needs has
been cut off.
In Afghanistan where our
Ambassador and their Adolph
Dube were abducted by a group
of Moslem extremists and later
murdered in a gun battle
between the extremists and
Afghan police.
At home the President faces
headaches in Congress where
Republicans and Democrats
alike are fighting the adminis
tration on budget cuts and other
programs.
In the public opinion, polls
where Mr. Carter's job-perfor
mance rating stands at the
lowest level since he took office
two years ago.
In challenges for the White
House in 1980, with less than a
year to go until the New
Hampshire primary, three Re
publicans, Rep. Philip Crane
(Illinois), former Democrat,
former Texas Governor, former
Treasury Secretary John Conley,
and ex-GOP Chairman and CIA
Chief George Bush have an
nounced that they are running.
GOP’s big gun, former Califor
nia Governor Ronald Reagan is
still in the wings.
With fellow Democrats, the
President may face several
challenges, the biggest from
Senator Edward Kennedy
(Mass.).
The president’s last headache
comes from his brother Billy.
The younger Carter’s remarks
about Jews and his association
with a group of Liberian
businessmen, have caused
some problems for the adminis
tration.
Other presidents have faced
greater headaches and over
come them, so we will keep a
watchful eye on Jimmy Carter
and see how he is going to spell
relief for his year of the
headache 1979.
Ashman’s Writes For The Last Time
by Glen Ashman
Dear Readers:
All good things must pass, to
coin a phrase. This is the last of
my regular Cluster columns.
Various responsibilities, includ
ing an editor over at the
Cluster's competition (the law
school's Legal Eagle), my
recent selection to Law Review,
my not-90-recent inclination to
attend class', and. most impor
tant of fj1, my girlfriend, a
Mercer+m I shall not name
because she is too modest to let
me say all the wonderful things
she deserves having said about
hb*^ simply leave me little time
to be the resident Art Buchwald.
Jack Anderson and David
Broder (my favorite three
columnists) of the Cluster.
1 have enjoyed the past year,
and am confident that some
brilliant and witty person, or
else Daryl Toor (just kidding,
Daryl) will fill this space more
ably than I.
So in this column it is time to
take care of business, to coin
another phrase. First of all, no
one w^n my impossible quiz,
which actually was a piece of
cake (I’m just reeling off those
new coined phrases today).
Hence, I still have a concert
pass for two, good on any night,
to any concert held at Atlanta’s
Agora. The first person to send
me a picture of themselves in
the Mercer fountain gets the
tickets, and the photo will be
returned after publication. Send
your drowning picture to me at
Box 108, Mercer Law School,
via campus mail. This contest
requires no brains at all. I’ll bet
a frat brother is in the picture.
1 almost ran a contest to
rename the Raven of Rock, but
the Mercer Rumor Mill says the
unique Mr. Toor will be leaving
Mercer. Besides who wants to
read through hundreds of
entries like Ayatollah RocknHol
la. Pigeon of Punk, and Blues
Bird anyhow?
Before 1 finish up. I’d like to
give some awards:
-The Failure as a Mother
Hen Award to Mercer’a Board
of Trustees and the Georgia
Baptist Convention for rples
that are the main reason all the
top students transfer from (or
shall we say escape from)
Mercer’s undergraduate school-
rulea like no weekday visitation,
letting Greeks overindulge in
daily alcoholisry in frat houses
while fining (and wbrse) non-
Greek mortals who do the same
thing (or even sip slowly) in
dorm rooms, and making
ref \ienta\eat in the worst
cafeteria in Georgia (not many
would if you didn't make them).
-The We're Number One
Award to Law School Dean
Bruce Jacob and most of all to
the Secretaries (without whom
the place would fall apart) for
making Mercer Law School the
best in the state and one of the
best small law schools in Jhe
nation.
-The Impeachment Award to
Jimmy Carter who deserves it
for his action (inaction?) in Iran,
Afghanistan, China. Panama,
and Mexico that has jeopardiz
ed U.S. security and oil
supplies.
-The Sorry State of Affairs
Award to Macon for having the
worst paved streets in Georgia.
Most needed paving a decade
ago.
-The Good Sense Award to
Americana everywhere for mak
ing ‘*60 Minutes’’ the top-rank
ed show on TV. One gets a little
worried about a country thr.
gets excited about being gl led
to the boob tube watching
educational TV like "Laveme
and Shirley”.
-Put Them In Their Place
Award to A. Edward Newton
(1863-1940) who reminds us of
the fact that "college professors
don’t know any better than the
rest of us”, something pre-med
professors should remember
when they try to flunk people
out of science courses in spite of
the shortage of doctors in the
country.
-Runner-up to the Put Them
in their Place Award to
Cleveland Amory (obviously
referring to the perverted sense
of humor that makes professors
offer important classes at the
un-Godly hour of 8 a.m.):
"People who get up early feel
virtuous all morning and sleepy
all afternoon.” How true.
So. it is finally time to say
farewell. Thanks for reading
this column over the past year.
Good luck on finals and may
God’s peace and love be with
each of you forever more.
Glen Ashman
TNX OBS
The participants in the
Cluater homecoming float
would like to thank our
friends in the,Organization of
Btlalian Students for their
aupport (literally) during the
homecoming parade. You
saved our poor feet for
another week's reporting.
Cluster
Hal Brodsky
Editor* in-Chief
Donna Gray
Managing Editor
Steve Reed Entertainment Editor
Gregory Mattson Photography Editor
Jerry Holden . Sports Editor
Pam Byrd Feature Editor
Elizabeth Donzella Aast. Entertainment Editor
Lindy Russell Layout Editor
Dan Goodman Production Manager
Karen Dnva Business Manager
Tom Bishop Newa Editor
STAFF REPORTERS
Glea Ashman. Brad Billings, Annette Boddie, Roni
Boyd, Vic Burchfield, BUI Gabbard, Walter Hauaaner, Dan
Kniffan, John Morgan, Cindy Morris, Mark Moeeiy, Rick
Niva, Claudia ScheaJer, Pam Secrest. Dawn Tonjes, Daryl
Toor, Greg Waling. 8ne Watson, Ub Williams. Ron
Akermaa, Catherine Hendricks, Stardra Protbo.
Randl Hamlin Pat Keenan and Mike Sisk.
LAYOUT STAFF
Mark Bloechi, Larry Patch, Alicia Ziadie, Sam Clymer.
PHOTOGRAPHY STAFF
Caren Campbell, Miadee Donner. Cindi God bold, Fletcher
Whitworth, Tom Erb.
THE MERCER CLUSTER is published weekly except
during exam periods by ths students of Mercer University,
Maeoo, Ga. Opinions expressed are not necessarily those of
Mercer University of The CLUSTER- Printed by KEEN
AND JUDD PUBLISHERS. Macon.
: —7
Homecoming Talk
Dear Editor:
I waa very pleased to see that
Mercer had a Homecoming
parade this year. I think it’s
high time that more than juat
Greeks get involved in the
U homecoming ck-orating and
festivities. In recent years the
Greeks kept the spirit of things
alive with lawn displays but the
big problem with this is. where
do non-Greeks build displays? .
As iov''the parade, I was well
pieced with the turnout of
participants. My only com
plaints were the lack of any
sizeable audience due to lack df
publicity, and the 35 mph speed
that it seemed the marching
participants had to make to
keep from being run down.
I hope that the .parade of
independents and Greeks is
reestablished as a tradition at
Mercer, and I hope to see many
more Th^the future.
MikeSla*