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PAGE *-THE CLUSTER. MARCH 13, 1**0
Mercer Mystery Diner:
Nu-Way Wiener Stand
By JIMMY-JO SMITH
Howdy! The Mystery Diner is
back! Having been bed-ndden for
ihrce weeks by a bowl of Mercer
cafeteria baked beans. Cameron
and I are once again healthy enough
to continue our fearless food forays
into the jungles of Maconga.
' Our stay at the Mercer Infirmary
gave Cam and I a chance to take
stock of our accomplishments. We
began our food and dining critique
by visiting the H & H Cafeteria, a
five-star eatery worthy of six. Then
came our tnp to Woo’s Pharmacy.
the place w ith cherry slushies and
a line of credit. The next logical
progression, we thought, was to get
ov er our bout with food-poisoning
and visit the Nu-Way Wiener
Stand.
As soon as we were healthy. we
jumped into Cameron’s trusty
Movie Review
family truckster and navigated our
way to 430 Cotton Ave. The
distinct aroma of hot dogs (or
wieners, as Nu-Way puls them)
met us as we entered the door. As
we sat down, we noticed the variety
of menu items Nu-Way had to of
fer: everything from hot dogs to
hamburgers, chicken sandwiches to
chib sandwiches, and even fish!
Fvc never relished a hot dog (it’s
a joke... get it?), so I let Cameron
order a Nu-Way chili dog while I
partook of a Mega-Burger. I was
quite pleased with my burger, but
Cameron w*s a bit upset over the
lack of beans on his chili dog. I
reminded him of what we had just
gone through with the beans in our
cafeteria, and we concluded that it
was for the best that there were
very few beans on his chili dog: the
general public, on the other hand.
may be a bit miffed at the lack of
quality in the chili. I believe thb is
an issue that needs to be looked
into.
There arc plenty of great things
about Nu-Way besides their aptly
named Mega-Burger, the french
fries, for example. These arc bet
ter than McDonalds' fries! 1 highly
recommend them. If you like
chocolate malts, (personally I
don’t) then the Nu-Way malt is
something to look into.
Truly, this place has quite an ar
ray cf food offerings to please even
the most finicky eaters.,
Well, thb b the last Mystery
Diner of the quarter, so I urge you
to vbit these establishments and let
Cameron and 1 know that we aren’t
wasting our money reviewing food
nobody is going to cal. It’s a dirty
job. but somebody’s got to do it.
Nightbreed: Beginning Of The Fun
By KEVIN BRADLEY
Young Aaron Boone (Craig
Scheffer) has a problem. U seems
tha he has been having these recur
ring nightmares about murder and
monsters and other such nastiness,
and a place called Midian. Decker
(David Cronenburg). Boone's
psychologist, leads Boone to
believe that his dreams relate to a
senes of brutal murders an^ihar
Boone should him himself in. But
then Boone finds out that Midian is
real.
Decker and the police chase
Boone to the real Midian, an
ominous looking graveyard, and
Decker tricks the police into
on Barker's writing, Hrtiraiier,
and Hellhound, which cover up a
lack of an interesting storyline with
obscurity and blood by the bucket,
Nightbnstd is riveting and well
done. Every time youthint you've
got the story pegged, it zooms off
in another direct son
The basic idea involves the best
twist on the old monster movie for
mula in years. Il seems that all your
basic monsters, vampires,
wolfmcn. snaketnen. all those
creepy craw lies, were all. well...
were all just these guys, you know,
who shared the earth with us in
limes gone by. Like Greta Garbo,
they just "vanled to be let alone.''
But all us natty mean human types,
given to hating what we don't
understand, exterminated them all
(and aren't we ashamed). aU except
this one surviving colony living
happily bepeaffi'* graveyard. So
here we've got our monster
character, or characters rather, led
by our old friend Boone (who got
bitten by a monster, you
remember), and axled by his per
sistent, if a bit daffy, girlfriend Lori
Winston (Anne Bobby) "Boone. I
don't care what you look like," she
says, “1 love you.” Right.
Anyway, Van Hcituig die Vampire
Kilfcr Ts” played' by our
psychopathic killer. Mr. Decker. In
place of the angry peasant mob
with pitchforks and torches, we get
a gang of crazed yokels led by a
brutal local sheriff, played with
great zest by Charles Haid, armed
with hamokas and fiamethowers.
By the time the smoke dears, the
audience is cheering wholehearted
ly for the monsters Get some more
popcorn, this is great fun.
The special effects and make up,
done by Image Animation, are in
credible. We get even more
varieties of uglies and slimics than
mHeUrmstr. And the blood spur
ting is handled with taste and
restraint (well, relatively). Don't
expect any Oscar nominations, or
even a Golden Globe for that mat
ter, but if you are an addict of tale
night horror movies on television.
Nightbmd is beyond your wildest
dreams.
Do You Want ViSA A MasterCard
Cradit Cards?
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